It was over.
All of this, it had seemed to take up so much time, so much effort, so much thought, so many people working together, and now it was over, in one instant. Everyone was most certainly not alright, and Harry was one of the many people who were scarred - both physically and emotionally - and would be forever. It just didn’t seem right that it should be over now after all of this work. Everything was gone in an instant, one night made everything change.
Nobody seemed to want to talk about anything: they were all bursting with so many words that they seemed unspeakable. This was a mixture of every emotion, of sadness, of loss, anger, joy, and, most strongly, of love. For those who had survived the night before - and for those who had not - love was the strongest emotion. There was grief over the lost, there was happiness of their victory, but the feeling of love topped them both.
They had all feared that they were going to lose somebody. And they all had. There were losses on each side; there was betrayal; there were families torn apart. There were tear-stained cheeks, there were red-rimmed eyes, and there were battle injuries that would leave their marks forever. There was a sense of defeat on one side, a sense of triumph on the other. But no side seemed to really have won, because everybody had suffered their own share of pain.
But in the air, there was something else. It wasn’t a sad feeling, but it wasn’t a happy one either. And it lived through the halls of Hogwarts, through the streets of Hogsmeade, through those who had participated in the war and those who had not. It was relief: relief that this was all over, that the enemy was gone. There was no more reason to fear closing their eyes at night. Hardly anybody had slept for days, and most people had chosen to catch up on that sleep in the day after the war.
Harry hadn’t, though. Oh, yes, he had tried, but nothing could make him calm enough to close his eyes. All of them... they had died for him. Fred. Snape. Lupin. Tonks. Colin. And far, far too many more had died fighting for him. They shouldn’t have had to do that. If he had gone straight to Voldemort when he had been called, they wouldn’t all have died. He might not have survived, but that was one loss against many more. They shouldn’t have had to do this just for him. He wasn’t worth that.
–Harry?†A very familiar voice brought Harry back into the real world, and a beautiful red-haired girl was standing in front of him. There were no more words said as she leaned up slightly on tiptoe to kiss him, and wrapped her arms tightly around him, her lips pressed up against his. In that short while, all of his worries were gone, and as he ran his fingers through her hair, he realized that not everything was lost. She was here and with him.
–Harry, they’re having a party in the Room of Requirement tonight. And they wanted me to invite you.†Her voice sounded a bit pained, and Harry knew why: she knew he wouldn’t go.
He sighed. –Ginny... you know what I’m going to say.â€
Ginny’s head bent down, as her head nodded minutely. –I - I mean, we just thought that you deserved it after all you did to protect us, to help us win. You deserve to celebrate, have some fun.â€
Harry shook his head. –No, Ginny, I don’t. Fred would be here if I deserved to be celebrated. And Lupin. And Snape. And all of the others.†He felt Ginny’s soft touch on his hand.
–Please, Harry. We would have lost some if we had won or not. Please don’t blame it on yourself.†Ginny reached up to flatten back his crazy hair, revealing the scar that was much more faded than it had been two nights ago.
Suddenly Harry let out a breath, and his thoughts escaped. –Aren’t you even upset about your brother? You can’t say that you aren’t.†He looked down at her, regretting what he had said immediately, but unable to help how he wanted to know her answer.
–Look, Harry, I am. But I’m not blaming it on you, or even myself. H-he...†Ginny paused for a moment, her eyes glistening but not spilling over. –We’re all sad, but I know he’s glad he died fighting for us.†Her eyes strayed towards the ceiling and she took a deep breath in, trying to contain herself. But soon a small tear began to form on her left cheek. Harry stared at her for a moment, unable to find any words. He just stroked the tear away with the back of his hand, cradling her face in her hands. Her watery eyes stared into his, and they stayed there for a moment. Then Harry allowed her to fall onto his chest and stay there for a while.
–P-promise me you’ll go. For me, and for Fred, and all of the others,†Ginny whispered, her voice shaking a bit. Harry looked down into her tired eyes and knew that he had to go. Nodding slowly, he gave her a small smile. Her cracked lips were expressionless, but her eyes smiled up at him.
***
A few hours later, as he walked slowly through the tarnished hallways of the castle, Harry couldn’t believe that this was the same school that he had first entered nearly six years ago. He couldn’t even believe he was the same person. Though, he supposed, both were correct. He wasn’t the same person; this place wasn’t the same. They had both been torn apart by hatred and unfairness and war. Neither would ever be the same.
As he slowly opened the door to the Room of Requirement, Harry was bombarded by friends - and people he’d never met in his life.
–Harry! C’mere, I want to show you something!â€
–Harry, can I have your autograph?â€
–Harry, is it true that you turned into a dragon to defeat You-Know-Who?â€
Harry suddenly regretted going and began to wonder why he had agreed to, until he heard a familiar voice beside him.
–Harry, mate! I didn’t think you were going to come!†Harry let out a huge sigh of relief to see that it was Ron.
–Ginny... asked me to,†Harry said, hoping there would be no more question. Ron had gotten used to the fact that they were together, but it was obvious that he wasn’t quite over it.
–Mm.†Ron began to wander over to a mostly empty corner of the huge room, and Harry followed him, slipping past the many people he had discouraged by not answering them. Harry was vaguely aware of his friend’s silent ponderings and glances back to him every so often, knowing that he was wondering what had given him this change of expression. But Harry would never have told Ron that it had been Ginny.
–It seems like I haven’t seen you in forever... Or Hermione, for that matter,†Harry said, trying to break through the wall of tension between them that had built up over the past few days because of Harry’s mood.
–Yeah... Hermione was supposed to be here; I don’t know where she is.†Ron looked down as he said this, his cheeks slightly pink. Harry raised an eyebrow at this, for it was the perfect clue he had been looking for in the past few days: he had a hunch that something was going on between them. He didn’t want to make the situation more awkward than it was, but he couldn’t help but ask nonchalantly,
–So... How’s she been?†He still couldn’t look Ron in the eye exactly.
Ron, quite obviously trying to get out of answering the question, tilted his head to the side. –Who?â€
–Hermione.â€
–Oh... Yeah, she’s been doing fine, just fine.â€
–Mm.†Harry nodded his head down. –I’m going to go and get a drink. You want anything?†he asked, as he had just noticed Ginny near the table of appetizers.
–No thanks,†Ron answered quietly. This surprised Harry slightly; he had rather expected Ron to get a large Firewhiskey. As he slowly made his way over to the table, Ginny came up beside him.
–It seems you haven’t broken your promise. I half expected you would.†She gave him a small smile.
–I almost backed out when I came in here: it was chaos,†Harry admitted. Just to prove his point, at that moment, a curly-haired Hufflepuff girl came up to him, nearly shaking with excitement.
–Harry, could I maybe... could I have your autograph?†she asked, her grin faltering as he didn’t answer after a second.
–I’m a bit busy at the moment, if you wouldn’t mind. Can’t you see I’m talking to someone?†Harry snapped back. He felt a bit bad, but he couldn’t help feeling on edge with all of these people pondering him. He didn’t look at Ginny as he poured himself a glass of water, knowing the reprimanding look reminiscent of her mother that would be on her face.
–Harry, you’ve just reminded me of somebody,†Ginny said, the smile she had given him seconds ago gone completely.
Harry glanced down, not hear her compare him with any bloody Slytherins.
–Harry, you know perfectly well that sounds exactly like something Malfoy would have said.†Ginny’s tone was harsh and cold.
Harry’s head hung. –Look, Ginny, I’m sorry. I dunno... You just don’t know what I’ve been through, alright? You don’t know what it’s like. I don’t even know how I defeated Tom; I don’t understand why I’m so famous. I just wish people would just drop it about me for once.†Harry once again became angered, and he turned to look Ginny in the eye. Her expression was pained, and Harry let out a deep sigh at this, realizing that he had hurt her. –I’m sorry,†he mumbled.
Ginny nodded. –It’s okay; I know this is hard for you. Could you please just understand that it’s hard for us, too?â€
Harry took in a deep, shaky breath, looking at all of the faces around him. Most of them bore injuries or scars from the cruel things that the Carrows or Death Eaters had done to them. There were smiles on most of the faces surrounding him, but there was a piece of happiness that was gone from each one of them that would never come back. They were going through just as much pain as he was, some a bit more, some a bit less. And he shouldn’t get angered by something as small as fame, something that many of these people would give a lot to have.
–Yes, Ginny...†His voice faltered as he stared up into her eyes and she wrapped her arms around his chest, her face growing closer and closer to his by the second. Then she did something he didn’t expect - she knocked the glass out of his hand. The corners of her mouth slowly turned upwards, and she gave him a rather mischievous smile.
–This is a party, Harry. You’re just going to have water? C’mon...†She gave him a small smile as she filled his glass up with the bottle of firewhiskey. –Have some fun.†She took a sip from his glass, then handed it to him, the grin on her face growing larger.
–Alright...†Harry took a sip and then set the glass down, his arms wrapping themselves around her neck. He closed his eyes as their lips met, and he lifted her slightly off of her feet.
In that moment, Harry realized: it was most definitely not over.
All Over by Theloonyhermione
Story Notes:
This was originally written for the Milestone Moment challenge, but... well... it's a long story. Basically, I just didn't get it in on time. ;)
Chapter Notes: What can I say? I'm not the great JKR.
A huge thank you to BrokenPromise as well, she did a fantastic job betaing this.
Chapter Endnotes: I will trade love, virtual pizza, and fried chicken for reviews. :D