I am the same Inverarity you may have seen on the Beta Forums, and other sites as well. I am an older HP fan, and prefer not to give out too much other personal information.
Reviews are greatly appreciated; I don't usually respond to them individually, but I do read them all. I'll answer questions when possible.
You can find information about my stories and characters on the Harry Potter Fanon wiki. (There is also a separate Alexandra Quick wiki.) Be aware, however, that most of it was written by fans, not by me, so the information there is not coming directly from the author and might not always be correct.
Artwork and banner images for all my stories, including illustrations donated by fans.
This is a very promising beginning, well written and in character for Snape. I hope it lives up to its promise, showing us a complex but not prettified or glorified Severus Snape.
"His mother was most likely what her classmates had needed to practice defence against."
Heh. I like that line. Severus already has that dry, acerbic wit.
And from such small childhood idiocies, tragedy follows.
After two chapters, I'm hooked. This is very well-written, the characters likeable, and your attention to culture and historical detail quite impressive.
I look forward to seeing how Tzipporah fits in at Hogwarts; there aren't many stories that deal with witches and wizards from different cultures in a realistic fashion.
That was beautiful. What a charming, bittersweet ending. I can see how wrapping it up with an epilogue that can do it justice will be a challenge; part of me wishes you would write more stories about Zippie and Edward, but I think this one was pretty complete. This has definitely made it to my small list of all-time favorite fanfics.
I continue to be impressed by the subtle way you interweave history into the story without overloading us with exposition. The OCs are very nice too, particularly the names (one thing I hate in a lot of OC stories is names that sound silly, out of place, or poorly thought out).
I also like that you are using some canon names, but not right away trying to make everyone Tzipporah meets be the grandfather/grandmother of one of the central HP characters.
Author's Response: Thanks! Sometimes I feel like my characters named themselves. The name Tzipporah was meant to stand out, but the rest I intended to sound just odd enough to be wizarding names, or else muggle names from the 1940\'s. I also had a lot of fun picking out canon surnames, just to keep my readers guessing.
That was an exciting chapter, and it was nice to see so many other students coming to Tzipporah's rescue. The idea of Hitler Youth Muggle-born wizards never occurred to me. The wizarding world's ignorance of Muggle culture explains why none of the teachers thought to do anything about the swastikas.
This was a really marvelous story. The epilogue felt a little rushed, trying to cover so many years and events in one chapter, but it tied everything together nicely. Rowling has told us so little about James's parents; they are relatively unexplored territory in fanfic. But it's amusing to learn that James Potter was, in fact, Jewish (since his mother was). One wonders if he was actually raised Jewish -- wouldn't Tzipporah have insisted on it?
For an Orthodox girl, Tzipporah seems awfully modern (becoming an Auror?), but then, she was eleven when she went to Hogwarts, and lost a lot of her connections to her faith, so perhaps she became less Orthodox over time.
There is so much glossed over here that could have become another story, or several stories, but I guess you've brought Edward and Zippie's tale to a close. I hope you have something else in the works!
How sinister! And I like that you are not automatically makng all the villains Slytherin. I really like the budding romance between Tzipporah and Edward, though at eleven, she does seem a little young.
I noticed one typo, where "do" should be "due to."
Can't wait for the next chapter!
This was a beautifully written chapter. (Actually, they have all been beautifully written, but this one stood out.) Tzipporah's reluctance to tell her friends, as frustrating as it has been for us readers, is just so believable, especially for an eleven year-old girl. And every line of dialog in her conversation with Clarice was perfect.
I love the way you are developing each character, letting the story build without rushing it.
This line:
"Edward looked as though he had just bowed to a hippogriff and was waiting to see if it would bow back."
is just so cute, so brilliant, and so perfectly Harry Potter!
This story is beautiful and touching and sweet, and one of the best works of fanfiction I've read. It's a wonderful children's story, and good enough to be published. I hope you are going to try to write professionally. It blew my mind when you mentioned AP exams in a previous chapter's end notes and I realized you're still in high school!
I would say something about looking forward to the next chapter (which I am), but I'd rather you take your time and update when ready, rather than "update soon." Just please do finish the story!
Mai struggles to find out where she belongs, caught between the worlds of Muggle and magic.
(Some emotional abuse, and mild substance abuse. Sexual situation warning applies to chapter four only)
This was an interesting, sad story, and it's piqued my interest enough that I might read your other one. It could have been a really good story, except that so much was compressed into such a small amount of time, the change in personalities seemed abrupt and unrealistic. The way Mai's entire family implodes and everyone stops caring about everyone else could have been much more believable (and just as tragic), but in four chapters, it just appeared that everyone gave up right away. Mai's poor mother seems to be suffering from depression, which is the only explanation for not even trying to curb her youngest daughter's dangerous behavior. Mai seems to be in complete denial.
I felt sorry for all of them, and wanted to smack all of them at the same time. I wonder if they will reconcile someday, as teenagers estranged from their parents and siblings often do once they put a few years behind them.
This is an interesting perspective on Muggle-borns going to Hogwarts, and I like that you are making the canon characters only peripherally involved. Mai's mother does seem a little quick to accept the idea of her daughter going off to an unknown school and learn things she sees no evidence of, and her father's abrupt coldness towards her seems extremely harsh. But it makes for a poignant story.
Author's Response: I certainly understand your point of view, and I would definitely say I agree. My only \'excuse\' is that this story was originally going to be a one-shot side-project, so the pace and reactions ended up magnified (perhaps a bit beyond belief) in order to quicken things up so I could get back to the main story. I admit, I probably should have spent a bit more time working on this fic than I actually did. :/
I liked the description of the classes -- it made the chapter long and full of exposition, but Witness Stone is so different from Hogwarts, it's wonderful to see how much thought you have put into describing each class.
The last few chapters have mostly been about introducing us to Marissa's world, and the cast of characters, so it's nice to see the story getting back to the main plot. The wizarding world clearly has no shortage of prejudices to overcome, even after the fall of Voldemort.
I like that you are including friends and foes from each house, rather than having a "good" house and a "bad house." The distinguishing characteristics of each house are starting to be more clear, whereas in previous chapters I could never remember what the differences between them were, other than arbitrary mascots.
Marissa is still my favorite character, of course. She still has that delightful combination of street-smart toughness and childlike innocence. It's nice that she's starting to develop bonds of friendship, albeit slowly and cautiously. She's tough and brave (she'd totally be a Gryffindor at Hogwarts), but she's got a lot of weaknesses as well.
I'm seeing much smoother writing, too. You have a marvelous way of capturing Marissa's unsophisticated way of thinking. The only sentence that really bugged me this time was "...she added it to her mind’s list of best things to learn." I know Marissa probably doesn't know the term "mental list," but here it reads like an awkwardly constructed phrase, not like Marissa's thoughts.
That was marvelous. You must either know Brazil well, or have done a lot of reading to capture the plight of Brazilian street children so poignantly. Marissa is already a wonderful and sympathetic character, and I can only wonder how she will reconcile going to a wizarding school to learn magic with leaving her friends behind on the streets.
Author's Response: Thank you for your kind review. Harry had a miserable life with the Dursley\'s, but we all know there are many children in this world who live an even more unfortunate existence. That is where I drew Marissa from.
Well, it wasn't a two-year wait for the next chapter this time!
I'm so happy to see Marissa's story continuing, even if I wish she'd make some progress. This chapter was very enjoyable, with more magical wonders and more of Marissa's interaction with her friends and enemies. But she's been struggling to do magic and enduring hexes from the Anacondas for several chapters now. I wonder if her magical gifts are truly "wandless," but I still remember how that one wand responded to her way back in an early chapter.
The Witness Stone teachers are as frustrating as the Hogwarts professors, with allowing all this bigotry and bullying to go on right under their noses.
It was nice to see the Condas get some payback. And a hint of romance for Marissa! Surely not a love triangle for 11-year-olds? :D
Please don't stop - it is my hope that we will eventually see this story complete.
Author's Response: Yes, I feel I'm really reaching breakneck writing speed now (or not). And yes Marissa is taking too much time to find some wand ability, but that's the fault of my story pacing. Maybe the next chapter will help her change that a bit. Thank you so much for your constant reviews.
Maybe it's only Marissa's MageMart wand that's holding her back, but I think there is some other barrier she needs to overcome. I love her unique talent. ("Avian legilimency"?) Now the question is whether this is just a unique character trait of hers, or will it prove somehow crucial?
I also really like the added details about the Quills and the legend of Jaguating. Beyond Marissa's tale, you have a crisis affecting the entire wizarding world. I can't wait to see how Marissa figures into it, but will this really be resolved in one book, or are you planning more Marissa stories? :)
I like how Anna and Sakura are becoming distinct personalities, and of course now I am curious to learn Anna's full story. Potira's possessiveness (and jealousy of Marissa's bond with Flap-Flap) is cute, but could be trouble later. (Is it too early to start shipping Marissa and Tiquinho? Heheh.)
I really have no criticisms to offer about this chapter, other than a few typos. This remains my favorite story on MNFF, and I'll be eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
I like that you're not glossing over the complexities of Marissa's situation, and that Professory Merrythought, while wise and well-intentioned, is clearly a bit oblivious to many aspects of Muggle existence. Marissa is sure to question some of what she learns as she enters the wizarding world -- how can she resist the temptation to use her magic to help her boys?
This story is becoming one of my favorites. And I love Marissa's swallows!
This is a very intriguing beginning, with a creative premise and an original setting. I look forward to seeing where you go with it.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I hope I can make it as interesting as your Alex story (although I don\'t think I can update quite as fast).
I'm so glad she was able to make the decision to go to school without alienating her friends. But I think it will be harder than she thinks not to become disconnected from the world she left.
Mr. Palito is interesting, and I suspect he knows a lot more than Marissa thinks he does.
I really like Saci! And your houses are great -- they aren't like Hogwarts houses at all, but their divisions and traditions still make sense.
It looks like Marissa is making friends with those who are ignored and dismissed, and she's staying strong despite her trials. I'm glad not everyone is cruel to her. This story is still brilliantly creative, and I can't wait to see what classes are like at Witness Stone.