Aw, this was a really nice story, with a fabulous ending. The grammar needed some work, there didn't appear to be many question marks when there really should have been, but it was a lovely concept, and Harry hugging Teddy in the rain was a very touching scene. I think the writing needs a little more care, mostly stuff that could be fixed with some proof-reading, but overall it was really nice. So thanks!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review. I know I missed a few grammer things, and I proof-read it twice, and then some one actually did beta it for me, but I\'m sure some things were still missed. Glad you liked the ending, it seems a lot of people did.

Hee hee, I loved crazy Sirius in the story's story. It was very believable. This is such a fantastic idea, I love how wrong it keeps going for poor James ... *huggles James*

Can't wait until they get together for real!

Author's Response: Oh, yes, James has very, very bad luck in this story... (rubs hands gleefully) but as almost all fairytales go, this one\'ll have a happily ever after. Thanks for the review! (:

SCHMERGO! You made your way into Marauder Era! THIS IS SO COOL! I, LIKE, LIVE HERE!

Yet somehow I managed to miss this. *Shifty eyes* I've, um ... been busy. =D

Love it so far. The accent was hilarious, spot on for his character. My money is already on James for the Pheonix. *prays that it's James*

Great opening chapter! I'm away to the next one!

Author's Response: Yay! Thanks so much! I\'m glad you like this, because your Marauder stories are awesome! I have too much fun writing accents and dialects. As for your theory, well... you shall see!

Oooooh, I love this fic! I really, REALLY want the Pheonix to be James. It would definitely explain why he's acting ... um ... more unusual, lately. Right? Cos he's trying to stop people thinking he's capable of anything as heroic as the Pheonix? Right? *clutches at straws*

Still. That would be be so coo.

LOVE THE FIC SO FAR! EEEEEEE! Lily and James are so original and wonderful! Yay!

And, as ever, you remain an expert on the Voldemort front. *Bows*

Author's Response: Thanks! *Zips lips as to Phoenix\'s identity*

And I\'m very, very happy that you said my Lily and James were original. I stayed away from this category for so long because the portrayals of these characters are always so similar.

I love writing about Voldemort. I had to include him because I\'ve stopped writing Voldemort humour fics-- everyone does it now, and it\'s not as fun anymore... but since this story has a lot of humour in it, I wanted to put Voldershmookins in there.

Wow. That's amazing! A really original story. The writing seemed a little clumsy at times, with occasional mistakes (Gryffindor Towel instead of Tower, and when she is listing her sons, she says Ablus James, which I presume means "Albus James", only spelt wrong) but the story and mystery that is incorporated really carries it through! Honestly, I think it's an amazing idea.

As for making it a chaptered fic ... it's a good idea, but I kind of like it how it is, I think it's nice this length - it kind of gives it a rushed, impatient feel, which works with the story, because I would imagine you would get pretty impatient living the same life over and over again ... so it works the way it is, I think.

Congratulations on a really original and interesting fic, anyway!

Author's Response: Thanks for the detailed review, I am really glad you enjoyed it!

Whee! This is moving pretty fast. First Task already over with? Wow. If I were you, and this were a movie, not a fic, I would have put in a montage. Something like this ... *cue rock music in the background*

(Remember for each shot, it holds for about five seconds, and is usually slowly zooming in on the person, or slowly zooming out, or slowly panning the scene, in a very montage way.) Open with Emma tying her hair up to get ready for training. Cut to Haley writing in the diary. Cut to Ivy studying. Cut to Jordan on the computer typing an email (close up on the words “Dear Georgi” as they are typed in). Cut to Ted talking to whatserface, the werewolf girl. Cut to Tyrone checking his hair in the mirror. Cut to Emma hexing a punchbag. Cut to Ivy turning a page in a book. Cut to Haley tapping her chin with her pen, then writing some more. Cut to Jordan typing furiously, and panning the email again, with words like “jealous” and “wish it was me” jumping out. Cut to the other champions doing some training. Cut to Ron blathering on, while Harry stares at a headline about Apple, and is clearly not listening. Cut to Tyrone pointing to himself with both fingers in the mirror and grinning. Cut to Ivy rubbing her eyes. Cut to Ted and weregirl (okay, I forgot her name, sorry. I know it began with A ...) saying goodbye and going in opposite directions. Cut to Emma really laying into the punchbag. Cut to Jordan typing the words “From Jordan”. Cut to Haley shutting the diary and stowing it away. Cut to Ted finding Ivy asleep, and covering her with a blanket. Cut to Emma hitting the punchbag so hard it goes flying. Cut to Jordan pushing “send”. Cut to Harry and Ron leaving the office, Ron knocking back another cup of coffee as Harry shakes his head. As the music hits that final drawn out note on the electric guitar, Jordan would look back at the room with the computer, and then wave his wand and turn out the light just as it finishes.

Yeah, I know. It's not a movie. But still, if it was, and there was a montage, that is SO how it would go.

Anyway. About the actual chapter. I really liked it, because I love how you never know exactly what's going on, and you sort of see things as the characters do. Like when Ivy saw Ted and the girl whose name I forgot - who knew they were friends now? Did Ted realise what she was feeling, or brush it off? What exactly is going on with Ivy anyway? And why wasn't there more Jordan in this chapter? Okay, I was kidding with that last one. It was a good chapter without overdosing on Jordan. It means I'll enjoy it even more when we get to see his thoughts next time!

I want to be friends with all five of the "Pentagon".

Until next time! =D

~Amy

Author's Response: Ahhh, it has to move fast because my story is only thirteen chapters long! I LOVE your montage idea. The parts about Tyrone made me laugh so hard. He WOULD do that.

The weregirl is named Arden. You\'re not the first to mess up her name, so maybe she\'s just not that memorable.

There SHOULD have been more Jordan... but then, there will be more Jordan in later chapters, so it kind of evens out. And you can only take so much Jordan at once! (He wasn\'t in the first one much, if you remember.)

The "schmell dem shlurpees burnin'" story IS the coolest thing ever. Interesting stuff like that never happens around here. Although possibly even funnier than that was "We're rehearsing a play" (Monsters inc. reference?). That made me laugh so much, especially imagining the look on Ron's face. And I totally wasn't expecting Giorgi to have made most of that stuff up. That was pretty cool. Well, not that she was making it up. That you'd written it so that it was as much of a shock to us as it was to Jordan (speaking of Jordan ... JORDAN!). Or, at least, it was a shock to me, I can't really speak for everyone else. But I generally believe whatever anyone tells me anyway. So maybe it's not that amazing. But I was impressed. =)

I don't know why you didn't like this chapter. I thought it was pretty fun. Although when they kept stopping to talk about their feelings, it was kind of like, "GO! Stop it! Apologise later! Run!" but I guess it made it a better storyline because they didn't quite make it, and Haley had to take over. Which was also pretty cool, by the way.

One of my favourite lines was also Jordan (JORDAN!)'s: "I tend to be." It was so Jordan and adorable.

So, anyway, back to more Chemistry revision for me ... *head hits desk*. If I didn't have all this work to do, I would totally enter your art challenge. *Sigh*.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I always like getting reviews from you... yep, the \'rehearsing a play\' was totally a Monsters,Inc reference. I\'m just that kind of person... can\'t come up with anything original. ^_^ Yeah, see, I hate this chapter because it\'s like, you start up the lawnmower, you start mowing grass and... the motor dies. And it comes back on, and it dies again. The action keeps stopping for the weirdest things. But I couldn\'t figure out how to fit these plot points in any other ways. I HATE CHEMISTRY. IT IS MY WORST CLASS AND MY LEAST-FAVOURITE. And until this year, I was Li\'l Miss Science Whiz. What kind of science is it, anyway? It\'s just math in disguise. And I am bad at math... but weirdly, I\'m better at math than chemistry.

Aaaaahhhh!!!!!

That was me exploding. JORDAN! JORDANJORDANJORDAN! He was so authoritative and adorable! And even though I don'tget the last line about the pigtails yet, I still found it really funny.

Seriously, this is the best chapter yet. Probably because it has Jordan at his most adorable. I just want to run at him and squeal. Is that weird?

I can't wait for Pride and Pre-juiced Plums (Funny name!). I got an email about a week ago telling me it had been put up (probably when you submitted it) but it wasn't there. But I'm already excited. I hope there's Jordan.

Speaking of whom ... JORDAN! Eeee! So sweet and full of authority with his little plan of action. Oh, and I share Haley's thing about team names. I always have to have a team name that is interesting, such as Team Sparkle.

Great chapter! My favourite so far! I seriously can't wait for the next one, it will be brilliant. Oh and one last thing ...

“He’ll read anything you shove in front of him.”

I think we're soulmates.

=D

Author's Response: I love my Jordan.... and I\'m very glad that you do. The thing about pigtails was, when Emma did the task earlier, someone commented that she always wore pigtails when she was being tough. You know what, I was hoping some people besides me would like Jordan. Pride and Pre-juiced Plums actually has three chapters up right now... There is very little Jordan in it, though, because it would involve HUGE spoilers for the third book.

For some reason I feel like sobbing. Only in a good way. I'm such a sucker for believing in yourself and conquering the world (uh, metaphorically) cliches at the moment. Even the song 'Defying Gravity' from Wicked makes me want to cry. In a good way. So all this finding yourself and growing up and sticking together has really got to me. In a good way.

Gosh, it's going to be really hard to pick favourite and least favourite OCs. Well, okay, Jordan for the favourite. But I also love Haley and Ted (TED! Why did I never notice how adorable he was until the last two chapters? It was the zoo that did it) and Vladislav and Giorgi and Apple, even though he was a bit wackadoo. I'm trying really hard to think of a least favourite OC but I can't. Except for Marina, but she's been banned. I even like Arden, because she reminds me of me three or four years ago (until I finally started making some really good friends at my school, and stopped being so annoying and shy to the point of stupidity. My past self REALLY annoys me. Luckily, now I'm more like Ivy crossed with a slightly toned down Haley). Um ... ooh, I know! My least favourites are those two guys with the weird names beginning with S who rigged the tournament for Apple. Yeah. I hate those guys. Yeesh. What were you thinking? =D

Also ... LEE IS LILY! I TOTALLY DIDN'T GUESS THAT! I read the theory in a review, but I didn't really hold much by it. I thought it was Lee Jordan (Hey, Lee Jordan's last name is Jordan! I never realised until now!). But it makes much more sense for it to be Lily, especially if James or someone had shown her the trick with the map, and she decided to do the same with a diary. I loved the way she was like "Why is everyone asking me that nowadays?" I love Lily. Especially when she's a little bit kooky. Which is why I wrote so many fics about her being kooky.

Although I don't know why you had to include that bit about Hagrid dying. Yeesh. Way to bum everyone out. Unless that was mentioned before now, and I just forgot. Whatever. Poor Hagrid.

Meanwhile, what past could Ron possibly have that could land him in serious trouble? That he once bought a book with tips on how to attract the opposite sex, then gave it to Harry for a birthday present and swore that it taught him all he knew?

Oh, wait. When you put it like that, you can kind of see why he'd want to keep it quiet. =D

Anyway, to conclude, I loved the chapter, I loved the book as a whole, and I love the series. I love Jordan, and also now Ted, although Jordan will always be my special favourite for old time's sake. Not that I didn't love Ted before, but ... the zoo thing means that I love him even more now. I'm also dreading someone dying in the next book. That's going to majorly suck. Are you sure you can't change it at the last moment? Please? No? Fine. Be that way.

Thanks for keeping me entertained! Still muddling through these exams ... so it's especially fun to take a break and read this every now and then.

Author's Response: Awww, thank you! I\'m the cheesiest person in the world, so I love sticking in all of these cliches! (And, yes, \"Defying Gravity\" does make me cry, too. Even when I\'m singing it. Though that might just be because of my terrifying voice! Also, the soundtracks to Tarzan and Brother Bear make me cry. DARN YOU, PHIL COLLINS!)

\r\nYour OC preferences seem to be extreeemely similar to mine. Jordan first, closely followed by Ted and Haley. I think my personal least favourite is Ivy, but then, I\'m so different from her that I have a bit of trouble relating to her. I\'m actually really pleased that you didn\'t guess who Lee was... I was worried that absolutely everyone would. And I really adore your kooky Lily (not enough people write her kooky!), so I just thought I\'d mention that.

\r\nAs for Hagrid, I mentioned a couple times throughout the first and second books that he\'d died, but the real reason why I killed him was that I was a hundred percent sure that JK Rowling would kill him in the seventh book. I killed off all of the characters that I thought were going to die, not necessarily who I wanted to die. (For example, Lucius Malfoy. I loved that jerk. But I thought he\'d die for sure.)\r\n

WHAT? NOOO!!!

I loved Apple! I was fooled! Tricked by those darned pinstripe suits. Hoodwinked by those dratted Converse trainers! This is terrible! Such a betrayal! How can someone with such perfect taste be apparently evil? SUCH PERFECT TASTE!

Anyway. I don't know why I didn't review the last few chapters, because I don't even remember reading them ... I just had to do a serious catch up. Let's see ... what happened ...

1) Ted and Ivy. SQUEEE! So adorable! Love it!
2) Jordan (JORDAN! EEE!!!) winning the Quidditch game in ten seconds. Uh ... that was ... anti-climatic. I wouldn't want to be one of the Beaters in that team, if all the training was for nothing. But still, it was Jordan, so ... EEEE!!!! LOVE!!!! HUGS!
3) Emma winning on moral grounds. Unexpected. And kind of hard to follow. But that's because I'm not in a particularly intelligent mood today.
4) Ivy being an animagus. Awesome.

Hooray! Confetti! Looking forward to the next one. Sorry it took me so long!

Author's Response: Helllooooo! Were you being sarcastic or serious about Apple? Because it sounded like sarcasm, but if you were serious, I\'m sorry.... at least there are still plenty of other lovely people in this story to fangirl!

I agree about the Jordan game... I hate Quidditch, I really do. I had to write it somehow... so I did that. Especially since I wanted ol\' Jor-jums to get a self-esteem boost. However, I do feel bad for Beaters like Tyrone and Chasers like Emma, \'cos they didn\'t do anything. >:( I feel like any sport where one player matters so much is unfair anyway.

I think the Emma part was hard to follow. I wanted to get it over with so we could leap into the \"Crazed Stop-Apple Mission Of Insanity\" of the next couple chapters.

Thanks for reading, and I\'m so glad you liked the Ted/Ivy! This was the first story I ever wrote with romance, so I was a bit insecure. (I did it about two years ago...)