Hahaha! I enjoyed this and nearly died when the boatman imitated their accent :D The ending line is rather fabulous. I have to admit I kind of want to read a novella about their experiences lol.

There were a few lines that threw me off, for e.g.:

Like a week after the guide in the swamps. Lightning striking practically overhead and I was stuck outside, jumping at every flash and thinking the next one was going to bring a burning tree down on top of me or hit me directly.

D: Is there something missing in the first line, or should the next line be a continuation of it?


Nice work, Minna! Silly, but definitely entertaining.

Author's Response: Ha, glad you enjoyed the accent-imitating (I kind of winced at it in retrospect, but that may just be how horrible his imitation is). Actually glad in general it's not as stupid as I feared. :D I'm not sure entirely what confused you about those lines, but I've gone back and made them more...grammatically correct. Poke me on AIM if that's not the issue? Anyway - thanks for the reviewww <3

I don't have a lot to say, but I hope the following few words can fully convey how much I enjoyed this.

I love how different this was from your other fanfics. There is something very OF about it. The characters and settings are so refreshing, and without Oliver being a wizard, it would still have been engaging.

This is in my opinion one of your best, seriously. The ending had me grinning!

Author's Response: Thank youuuuuuuuuu! I think the ending was a tad rushed, actually, but I had a deadline to reach. If I get the chance after the comp, I'll add a little more, perhaps.

I am pleased you liked this, Nat because this was one of those fics that kind of took over (you know that feeling) and so I wasn't sure if it actually worked and was interesting or whether it was just me quite liking it. Ohhh, and OF ... hmmmmmmmmmmm .... thinking, now :)

Thank you very much again :D ~Carole~

Er ... Why does this not have any other reviews? I am perplexed. People, come out of the damn closet!

Anyway, Miles and Adrian. How many times were they even mentioned in the books? :D But that's what's great about these characters, isn't it? You have a canon network that you can play with whichever way you want, but one who is deemed a good fanfic author is one who does that well. And you have so far!

This story is not pretty. Neither are the characters. It's not one designed to make the readers fall in love or make them think that - hey, life is beautiful. Because it often isn't. You haven't wasted any time establishing a dark, uncomfortable and unpleasant mood.

The characterisation shows promise as of now; the plot is still very raw. I am trying to figure out how the rest of the story is going to pan out. But what you have given us so far has me caught, and I eagerly await the update.

Welcome back to writing!

~Natalie

Author's Response:

I feel like I've lived with these two for so long, because I've always had head canon for them both. Adrian's is less unpleasant than Miles's, but both of these boys have a story to tell.

It's almost surreal for me to see someone read this, not knowing what I know about how it ends. It feels like it's cast in a different light than it is in my head, and I do wonder what sort of epiphany will happen once the fic progresses to the next stage.

In a couple ways, Adrian isn't that much different than Harry. Both of them had s*** childhoods, but they take these things in stride and look for better things. Miles...is a different story, one you will see in full force next chapter.

Thanks for reading and reviewing, and it feels good to be back!

~Jezza

Oh my Kara!

This is such a fantastic story. UGH! I don't know if I can explain my feels properly in this box :x

The characterisation is just so spot-on, and I don't just mean the main characters of the plot, but the house qualities and even the minor ones, including the gargoyles guarding Dumby's office. The banter was absolutely entertaining to read, too. It just had a ... Tonks vibe to it. I can't describe it exactly; it just fit so well. The only thing I doubted at the beginning was Oliver being the captain of his team. He's in fourth year here, right? But then, it dawned on me that apart from Charlie, the other players are also rather young, and he might have wanted to concentrate on his NEWTs instead. Actually, the more I think of it, the more it made sense not to make Charlie captain. This way, it's clear he loved Quidditch but his top priority was not it.

The details, though. That is something that I admired - nay, envied - endlessly about the Unbreakable Curse, and it was no different here. The way you planned classes and curriculum is awe-inspiring. I've said it before and I'll say it again: if there's anyone I know in our friend circle who will make it in the fantasy literature world, it's you. You have the kind of expansive imagination and attention to detail required. Seriously, I'm a sucker for the "magic" part of the Potterverse, and there's been plenty of times when I wondered what NEWTS would be like, and this satisfied my cravings!

And the plot! GAH. Perfectly paced, my darling, and how well-executed. l like how easily I was fooled into thinking Martha was going to be a possible victim. Hahaha! The dream realm was an endlessly intriguing character in itself. Quite scary, actually.

My only crit is that a few of the chapters suffered from minor technical issues: missing punctuation, capitalisation issues (in naming), and spelling errors. I saw a Venomous Tentacular somewhere - it was the second chapter in which it was mentioned - and Laura Byrd became as Myra in a later chapter, and Lisa in the final one. :O

These are things that can be easily fixed when you read the chapters again. The core content remains wonderful and exciting.

My haircape is off to you, Fraulein Dargen!

~Natalie

Author's Response: Nataliiiiiee! Wow, you read quickly!

I could kick myself especially for these name issues! I fixed everything you pointed out now - thanks! I changed almost everyone's name two times at least and thought I'd caught everything, but then I had different versions of chapters floating around between betaing and editing etc. -- anyway, thanks for pointing it out, and if there's anything else I'd appreciate if you'd let me know!


Thank you so so much for all your kind words. I don't quite know what to say, but you have to know that I'm feeling very fuzzy inside right now.

Oliver being Quidditch Captain that year is actually canon (because Fred and George knew his speech, and Tonks and Charlie graduated the year before Harry got there), as is his age. I tried to show him as a slightly less secure Captain. And yeah, Charlie used to be Captain but gave it up (in my opinion) to focus on NEWTs, in an uncharacteristically sensible move ;)


Again, thank you so much. wow.

I am crying. Yeah, this is what I meant on AIM lol. This is just one of the most amazing things I have ever read, not only because it was written for me (hehehe), but because it is utterly brilliant in its execution! There were so many lines that literally made me shiver, and I think my brain had multiple nerdgasms as each student was assessed.

:( this was rather ... Heavy stuff, gina. The tension, anger and confusion were all so thick and palpable. I'm now registering what it must have been like for remus that night. The only thing nagging me is that in POA, sirius and remus reveal they had suspected each other of being the spy; or was that all sirius at first? But this is a nitpick that doesn't cause damage to the overall great quality of the fic. Nicely done! -Natalie

Author's Response: Natalie! Thank you so much for the review! You know, I really did think about those lines from PoA, I did. Well, I don't know why I didn't include it the first time around, but as I was editing out Snape I thought about trying to include it in the rewrite. Dumbledore does mention something. We do know that Sirius didn't tell Remus the location because he suspected Remus. I think Remus says something then in return about suspecting Sirius. I guess I just saw Remus *at this moment* as simply not believing Sirius could do such a thing. I think I've been influenced by too much fanfic, lol - esp. Remus/Sirius. WHICH is not going on in this story, but maybe, just maybe, Remus didn't really believe it was possible until after it all happened. Plus, I just wasn't sure where to add it. I focused Remus's anger more on the fact that the charm failed, the Potters were dead - even a bit on Snape (the original had him punching Snape in the face, lol) So yes - hope that answers your question a bit. I hope it wasn't too distracting. I bet someone else will call me on it too, lol. But I do (as always) think there is room for interpretation when it comes to this...at least until PoA comes out on Pottermore. Then I'll have to delete half my author's page, I'm sure, lol. Thanks again for reading!! I really appreciate the review. :) ~Gina :)

for a minute there, i thought you had hooked tracey up with susan. oop. see, caron still stuck in my head :P

Author's Response: I know, it all gets very confusing in my head, but Tracey was with Demelza in one story, and Susan hooked up with Lisa. It's when i still have them doing the same jobs that I get very confuzzled. This story isn;t caron, though. Well, it doesn;t fit with High or Sabrage or ... whatever else I'm joining together to make one huge fic that JK will never take down. Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaa.

Thank you - tee hee. ~Croll

Great work gingin!i just typed out a longish review and my phn lost the text.will review properly again tomorrow :x

Author's Response: As per Croll's orders, I am finally responding! That you for the review and especially for calling me gingin as I haven't heard that in a long time! Is this enough? I will respond properly to the next one. Thanks again! ~Gina :)

Perfection.

But hahaha let me first laugh at Ron blundering into a pivotal moment, It made me giggle, as did that momentary lapse of Snape's solid demeanour. I wonder if I should write Severus/Fleur. Fleverus. YES!

Ahem. Wow. As I said, this pair has chemistry that - er - showered down on my biology, after a fashion. Their relationship is amazingly sensual, but I also love how they show their vulnerability to each other. I never did think about Fleur being that lonely, with her girl friends unwilling to be not biased, and boys preferring to droll rather than lend an honest ear. That was startling.

Tonks. Oh dear. I now have the hottest hots for her. I've always adored Tonks, but never felt so much attraction towards her. Her characterisation was fabulous as well!

But Bill and Fleur... that's like a sacred pairing ... so sorry, Tonks. You do get Remus in the end.

~ Natalie

Author's Response: FLAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You must write it.

I demand FLAPERY!

So pleased you liked this. I had horrible issues with it, having started initially for the Rainbow Challenge then stopping when I decided I hated it. But then I liked the peaches bit at the beginning, and after rereading decided to rewrite and add (and add a lot lot more - ooops)

Mmm, for some reason Fleur didn't come over as that hot, but I think that's because I was writing from her POV and so while we were experiencing her thoughts and reactions, it was her reactions to Tonks that we were reading. I've never written smutty Tonks ... not sure I can believe that - ha ha.

Yeah, I had to split them up because Bill and Fleur are just too hot not to meet. If I dared do a Tarentino and Kill Bill (geddit) then I'd reunite them, but alas, I believe half teh flist would rewrite the scenario and Kill Croll.

Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu ~Carole~

Once upon a time... uh well, actually not too long ago, I read another fic by another author on the same situation: Hangman by littlebird. While the two fics are very different in tone and mood, I think both manage to do justice to this phase of their life, and especially to this day.

You wrote Ron's shifting moods very well, how cheery and positive he can be without the locket and how he can immediately go sour once it's back on. But I thought Harry and Hermione was great, too! And the of plum cake? Genius! Hahaha! I may have to try that out someday.

This is a memorable fic, Pooja. I love it for its genius, but also because you wrote it without sugarcoating anything :)

Author's Response: Really? I wanted to read 'Hangman' but it slipped my mind somehow. I must read that, then. Thank you for letting me know!

Ron'd moods were the most difficult to write, to be quite honest. I needed the thought processes to change abruptly, and yet maintain Ron at a bearable level. I also wanted this to be a little fluffy, and to bring a smile to the reader's face without compromising on the situation at this point. So yes, I am very, very happy that you think it worked well! Harry and Hermione were easier because I didn't have to write much of them, ha, but I'm pleased that you liked them too.

As for the plum cake... :D. I might actually try it at some point too, ha! And, well, nothing in life is ever sugar-coated, is it? We have to take it as it comes. ;) Thank you for the review, Natalie! <33333