I have always been a huge fan of Draco/Hermione fics. When I started out on MNFF I was obsessed with James/Lily and gradually the ‘Other Pairing’ category drew me in. It took me quite a while to find D/H.

The thing about Draco and Hermione is that they are involved in such a fire and ice relationship. To write both forces and involve both elements is an extremely difficult task but Kyte, you have done it. I originally thought that their relationship was purely platonic but I must give your fic the credit of pulling it off. I have read a variety of fics, each with their own explanation of how this pairing came about but I loved your idea! It was very original and did not deal with circumstances forcing them together. So kudos to you for that!

One thing that bothered me a bit about this fic was how quickly Draco and Hermione came together. They have been enemies for seven years and can one kiss really change all that? Even if it did, I think both of them would be in denial at first and wouldn’t admit it so openly to each other. Perhaps you should extend your second chapter a bit, concerning this.

Another aspect of this story is the dance. Now, dances are generally considered cliché in the fandom and pulling them off is difficult. For one thing, I do not think that Dumbledore would ever host a dance to raise school spirit. He might allow potential Lockhart’s to have their fun with decorating the halls, but we haven’t even seen one dance other than the Yule Ball in the six years Harry has attended Hogwarts. For one thing, is the dance really needed? Harry and Hermione could still make out with Draco Malfoy coming across them. The dance doesn’t seem that crucial to the plot.

"How does he expect dancing will take away the fear of You-Know-Who simply bursting in on us at any moment?” sighed Hermione. Ron shook his head and Harry simply stared at his dinner plate without saying a word. He seemed to not be talking and staying silent quite a lot lately.

I think that you captured Hermione’s reaction perfectly. She would take a rather logical stance at this. And of course, you captured Ron and Harry perfectly too. Right here, you characterisation is spot-on. Good job! Also, Harry’s reaction wasn’t sudden at the end. When I first read this, I was wondering about it’s relevance but when I went on I realised that he was thinking about Hermione.

"Well then....that was unexpected," said Hermione, and Harry and her both smiled, happy for their friend.

I am a grammar freak unfortunately. The thing is, you really should have elipses in that dialogue instead of four periods.

"Does Weasle know about this? Does Weasle know that his two bestfriends are kissing in the moonlight by the lake", cried Draco.

This is such a typical Draco statement and perfectly shows the rivalry between them. Alright, again my grammar freakiness comes into play. There really should be a space between best and friends. Also, Draco calls Ron ‘Weasel’. Aaaargh! How I hate my nitpickiness.

"Fine. Your friendship will be ruined then." Hermione sighed and, without looking at Harry, said," Fine. But once and only once."

"Deal."

Oh wow. Perfect ending to a lovely chapter. I love the finality with which Hermione says deal but there was one thing in this paragraph that confused me a bit. ‘Hermione sighed’ should really come as its own paragraph to avoid confusion. You should get something like-

“Fine. Your friendship will be ruined then."

Hermione sighed and, without looking at Harry, said," Fine. But once and only once."

"Deal."

Overall, I love the theme of the fic and its lovely characterisation in the beginning! You have an excellent start here. All you have to do is to remember to take things a bit slower. Other than that- lovely job! I look forward to reading more from you.

An excellent chapter and i am glad to see this tory has beem getting along so well with such a positive response from all it's reviewers. Now to get down to business. What i liked was that you have a very good voice in your writing style, your grammer is quite good. I also enjoyed your descriptions and the emotions potrayed and the fact that the story began with Mr tibble's point of view. Maybe it was unwise to start the first half of the story that way because by the way it was described i thought it was Ginny not Molly. Anyway it was a nice, entertaining story! Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: Thank you!

An excellent story. Wow! I really liked it but peter pettigrew and umbridge? *shudders*. They are suited for each other though. I really should have used this in the rare- pair scavenger hunt. Oh well! What i like was your characterization, your ideas, your imagination, your humour and your creativity. They were all excellent and i thoroughly enjoyed your story. You migbht want to add a little bit of action to prevent your story from becoming too much of a drag but overall an excellent effort

Author's Response: *lol* I don't think it was even in the option *L* - No one is probably sick enough to actually write a romance about those two. *snicker* I do have a sick sense of humour.

Thanks for the advice.

As always with you Miel, good work! I have now read almost every single story of yours and i must say i thoroughly enjoyed every one of them. Ok, i like this chapter a lot but it needs to have a wee bit more flow and that is pretty much the only mistake you made. Otherwise everything is perfect. Your writing style is good and your characterisation excellent. An extremely delightful read!

Author's Response: *lol* This is actually my first fic so it is a bit choppy. I've been trying to slowly fix it by adding a short scene here and there ... correcting the tenses... although not much recently.

A rather interesting story written from a whole new angle.I can't beleive i did not notice it before.Ok i have to go out so i will leave a short review- what i liked was the way you took the story, its angle, its gist, i realy liked it.Your construction grammer and general writing style are excellent as well.Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: Thanks :) AU does give us a chance to twist everything up nicely :)

An excellent chapter. Well written. Good plotline. And a real good choice of characters. You certainly know your grammer. This chapter is really well thought out and makes a reader thirsty for more. Good job! 8 is the highest i give anywhere.

Ok my previous review had a lot of mistakes so I am correcting it here-

Another example of your twisted sense of humour Miel. I absolutely loved it! Ok, very little criticism to be given here so I will speed things up a bit.

The humour in this fic is wonderful and it is a witty parody. Now, the pranks described leave the effects to the reader's imagination, I really liked that. Also, the part about Fred and George working with two blind house elves is hilariousl. You potray them very well, bright and funny not to mention the little (forgive me a huge) mischevious streak. The prose is excellent and quite pleasant for some light reading. Descriptions of reactions is well done and also I like the way Percy emerges from the shadows. That is such an overused method of eavesdropping in dark, sinister fics that it is quite refreshing to read them here.

Now just some minor stuff.

Some lines seem to be a little abrupt as if you are deliberately restrictig yourself from expressing the story better in order to make it rhyme. This disturbs the flow of the poem a little bit. However, there are very few areas in which this has occured. So overall, it's good.

Miel, I totally love your writing. You are an amazing author. Keep up the good work!

PS- I too am staying in Gryffindor.

Author's Response: Glad to hear that. At least things won\'t be so quiet anymore :) ... I don\'t hang there as often as I used to. ^_^

*lol* this is one of those stories where I can get away with just throwing things in; use age old cliches, it\'s actually not really a poem nor a story. It\'s a parody-play or sort - the idiotic force-rhyming is part of the comedic tactic. :) I want the rhyming to sound force sometimes to emphasise the idiocy of it all. *L*

A good read! yeah, i actually kind of enjoyed it ok i will review in two parts.see below what i liked- the actual story. Your grammer was good and your writing style was excellent too what i did not like- your story is too slow. You could improve upon thisby putting a lot more action. There is always room for improvement Good job!

Wow. Rarepair all right!

OK, this review is basicaly going to give you a little critique and character help-

1) Molly as we know isn't all that sharp or intelligent but is instead kindly, wam and homely. So in this light I would suggest using charms instead of transfiguration. It seems to make more sense.


Just a suggestion.

2) I doubt Arthur Weasley was the 'cool guy' as you describe him. He might have seemed that way to Molly but I doubt anyone else thought the same.


Ok, just as few minor flaws in characterization over there but I love the story so far.


Especially how Molly thinks she isn't worth him and all that. I would love to see more of your work.

Keep writing.

PS- I have to dash off to school now.

It is a really good fic! Well as i see most Draco/ Hermione fics are ste after the fifth year but this is really cool and i from a whole new perspective. Also you have somehow managed to keep everyone in character and developed an interesting plotline. The teenage angst shown is pretty realistic. Overall i would say a good story but i cannot give it a full rating because i really like extreme stories (that's just me though! most people will like your story) and this one is a little fluffy in parts despite the angst.