Forget cricket...that's not Quidditch! At least no one has reviewed, which is what that person deserves-- to be ignored, and then banned from the site.

Keep your head up, and keep writing this story! ^_^

Author's Response: Thanks for your support! MNFF has taken swift action! Thanks for the encouragement!

I still think Harry's story will overshadow any other, lol, but if the true Marauder tale is told in the wizarding world, it will be fascinating. Nice start- funny to think of a poem having chapters, but I look forward to reading your take on them! ^_^

Author's Response: As I can\'t tell Harry\'s story as effectively as Jo, I leave it to her(Hee! Hee!). I chose the Marauders as there are a lot of undercurrents in that story. As for the chaptered poem, my muse hits me in installments! As always, thanks for your reviews and encouragement. I wouldn\'t be writing, but for it.

"Remus smiled."

I smiled too! ^_^

Author's Response: I think that was one of the nicest reviews till date!

Broody!Remus isn't my fave, blasting bushes like Snape, lol, but I loved this line, ‘My favourite flavour too! Bubblegum!’

There is a splinching problem, your chap looks like one humongous paragraph, that you might like to fix.

Author's Response: OK! Will try to fix it. Thanks!

I love this story and your sense of humour! Poor Remus, the pranker pranked. :D Seems he should be the one given a little extra credit!

Author's Response: I think Tonks awards him bonus points on a fairly regular basis. And you can be sure he gets a good score on his practical exams. The extra credit goes to you, though! Thanks for reading, reviewing and pointing me down the straight and narrow. ;)

I have a different view of R/T, but yours is very moving. I think you should consider adding Romance/R/T cat to your poem to give more Tonks and Remus fans a chance to read it! :)

Author's Response: Thanks!

Yay for you using Fire Crab nail polish! ^_^

What made you decide to use 'real time' narration? Why make Meera Riddle's daughter, and do you really think Draco Malfoy would name his son Oedipus, much less shorten it to a Muggle-sounding Ed? I find it really interesting that you have Meera 11. Being a romance writer, I wonder if this is a friendship story or if you're going to show Meera growing up during the course of the fic and caught in a love triangle with James and Ed. Questions, questions, lol. :D

Author's Response: Yay for you coming up with Fire Crab nail polish so that I could use it in my story! Many thanks! :D I\'m more comfortable writing in the present tense, plus, I feel it helps my audience really relate to the characters and feel what Meera is feeling. As for Malfoy, well, Draco was a really harsh Greek lawmaker, right? So it sort of makes sense that he would name his son after a Greek king. And remember, Ed spent time in a Muggle juvenile deliquency centre. There\'s more coming to that story, but I guess I can tell you that\'s where his name got shortened...I mean, how many kids do you think can pronounce Oedipus? haha As for the romance, I was thinking about having some later, but I never thought of a James-Meera-Ed love triangle. Great idea though!!! Hmmm, I might have to use that one...;)

I don’t read much HP original character centered fiction, but I liked your title and the mystery of how a person would have such a Patronus.

Joseph is a sympathetic character. He studies hard and has big dreams. You do an excellent job hooking the reader with worry while setting the scene for his disappointment. Sprout was delightfully in character and shrewdly used to reveal Joseph’s situation and character (he’s competing against students with higher marks, but he’d be atop the list if decisions were made on effort alone) and to state what struck me as the theme of the story: Given enough time, anything is possible.

In the second paragraph, I noticed that you’re telling when you could show to greater effect. What does “looking dejected” mean to you? Slumped shoulders, feet dragging, long face: whatever you “see” can be shown to let readers make inferences.

Also, when you italicize a character’s thoughts, you don’t need to say “he thought to himself.” The italics are doing that for you.

Joseph’s humanity, for lack of a better word, was expressed very nicely when It infuriated and hurt him when he laboured so assiduously to meet deadlines only to see his work go completely unnoticed. He has pride and a writer’s ego that would rather collect rubbish than work for the Prophet.

In the second scene, his inconsistent emotions seemed very true to life. He’s tried to brace himself, but it’s still a painful blow. He tries to find solace that the torturous wait is over, yet sends out his application knowing in the back of his mind he’ll always be waiting, he’ll never abandon his passion, no matter how he appears to move on. He’s realistic yet optimistic, and quite likeable.

I did wonder about Joseph’s background when I read Two torpedoes had just slammed into his hull. Did he get the expression from his Muggle father? Comparisons usually clarify, but this one muddied the story waters.

When Jessica says, “That’s my favourite!” the “she” in “she beamed” should be capitalized. Characters can only speak dialogue. They can’t beam it, even if they’re transporter room engineers on the USS Enterprise. :)

It was interesting to find out Joseph didn’t go back on his vow not to work for the Prophet, that his pride wouldn’t allow it, yet he could work as a short-order cook. His elation at receiving the letter and Jessica’s thoughts on what her husband endured for them was vivid and touching. The only thing lacking was an explanation of what Jessica had been doing the last four years. Did she work? If not, why not? Joseph’s pride, or a medical condition? I assume her parents are wizards but it isn’t stated, and until I read about Uncle John I wondered whether Joseph was an orphan or estranged from his family for them not to be mentioned. I think it would have had more impact if you’d mentioned Uncle John along with Harry Potter at the beginning (or if the character occurred to you when writing, to have gone back and edited him in afterward).

The scene with the Dementors was riveting, the explanation behind the Patronus moving. There was a Tiny Tim air to the whole thing, a subtle foreshadowing. If I’d been your beta, though, I would’ve gently demanded you edit His son’s eyes exploded to Aiden’s eyes grew huge with delight or sparkled with delight. You used “his son’s” two sentences prior, and “exploding” gives a cartoon air to what is a tender, pivotal moment. As a reader and fellow writer, I implore (since I am in no position to demand, :D) you to edit that one line before any other.

In the final scene, the image of the grass waving like his son’s hand was so poignant; I read that paragraph twice to enjoy the beauty fully.

The ending was bittersweet, in a satisfying way. Thank you for writing the story.

Oh, how he hated finishing his own sentences.

Very angsty, in a lovely way, that tightens the throat and brings a melancholy smile. No one could hate this, so I demand you change that to especially if you enjoyed it! :)


Author's Response: Lol, thanks for the demand. It\'s an honor to me that you read my story and actually liked it.

I was struck by how often she refers to Ted as 'the Hufflepuff' or his qualities as 'Hufflepuf' this or that. Andromeda's trying to maintain distance but then kisses his cheek. I think she's outsmarted herself! ^_~

Author's Response: Lol. You\'re the first to catch that, even before myself! :D