I am old. Older than Jo. Not quite as old as Voldemort.
In fact, I am exactly Marauder-aged. Which might be why I don't read much Marauder-era. Can't compete with Lily....
I love Neville's job! I also like your gilly-weed-in-the-chicken problem - how clever, to have the cooked results be different from the raw, so the customer would not have to stick his head in the lobster tank to live...
This is a really good story so far. One suggestion I have is that I'd like to see a little more of what Neville is thinking and how he behaves. For example, having his tell Luna a bit more about how he is feeling, even if she already knows (She made that bulletin board - how does he react when he realizes she did that for him?) or showing the scene where he is getting the poor man to ST. Mungos and dealing with his family could be really good forshadowing of how he is going to deal with Harry... You sort of hint at his dealings with Willis, but a tiny touch more of that would be great...
What I'm saying is that this is a terrific story, and the suggestions are just things that would make it even better - for ME. Your mileage may vary, as Muggles say in their car commercials.
Author's Response: Thanks.
I\'ll try to add more of what Neville is thinking and feeling and so on in upcoming chapters, but I don\'t know how it\'ll turn out.
I can see why you were in a rush to get to this point!
In this chapter, if Ginny actually HAD that conversation with Luna, instead of us hearing about it, I think it would be worth it, even though it would take a little time.
I started reading this story because I am writing a story with Neville as a main character and I wanted to see how you handled him, but the plot is very interesting and I am caught up in it. I hope you are able to update soon.
Author's Response: Thanks for the feedback. I\'ll try to update ASAP.
Amazing! Having bothered you with that silly e-mail question I thought the least I could do was click on your banner and read your story...I am so glad I did! The magic you've introduced is very well thought-out, and of course if there was going to be one muggle alarm system in all of Diagon Alley, it would have to be on Fred and George's shop, for so, so many reasons...
The burning question is who is Marlow, and the fear would be that somehow he is Harry...
I'm flagging this. I really want to read more!
Author's Response: Hi ProfPosky,
Lol thank you, and the email wasn\'t silly at all. With regards Marlow your fear may be correct, although my lips will not part again on the subject.
If you want tore ad it in a big chunk (if you haven\'t already) there are a lot more chapters over at Phoenixsong.net.
Thank you for reviewing,
Myth
Marvelous - I read straight through, which is why there is no review to chapter 1 - I couldn't stop to leave one! "The boy who insisted on living" - Oh, I LOVE that line... But really, the whole thing holds together well so far...although I am expecting to find out that Hermione hasn't used a love potion at all..however, is Snape really moving this quickly. Sigh. I await your update to find out. I think you've really managed to capture the characters as they would be a few years down the line, btw.
Author's Response: I\'m glad then that you caught on at Chapter two and not ten. *grin*
Hee. VV\'S favorite line is in the next chapter; this one was mine.
Do you really think Hermione managed to slip something into his drink while he was looking...? Only the fic shall tell...
*is flattered*
This is ONE DAY'S work? I am in awe...
That poor woman! That nasty Julius! Now I have all sorts of questions running through my mind. What happened to her when Draco fixed the cabinet? Is she still alive in there? Montague was gone for weeks and survived without food or water... (He also apparated out of the cabinet, on Hogwarts Grounds... that has always bothered me...) Could this poor woman walk out of the cabinet one hundred years after she went in? That would be very interesting to see.
She is a very real character to me, and in a funny, inverse proportion warped kind of way reminds me of her antithesis, Emma Bovary. Thank you for this terrific story.
Author's Response: Now, see, you\'ve given me the idea for a follow up with this review. I\'m glad you enjoyed it. I realy loved writing it. *hugs*
As another huge fan of the WWI poets I applaud your achievement here! The green light of AK reminds me of "as under a green sea, I saw him drowning..." from Dulce et Decorum Est, by Owens... of course, AK just IS green light, but the feeling around the two was similar. I am being as clear as mud here. You captured a bit of their sound and sensibility - Brava!
Author's Response: Thank you, ProfPosky! It\'s always good to find a fellow admirer of that particular group of poets. Such a shame that many of them, by their deaths, will be forever \'War Poets\'.
I am so glad to see you have this up here! I've already told you I think it is really good, so I wanted to tell everyone else, too.
I don't hink this sort of thing happened much at my HS - I would have known, because I was probably friends with the people it would have been happening to. However, I went to HS long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away. I think a lot of people face these situations today, from one side or another. It's really good that you told it from two different sides - we see how Ellen felt, and also how Cedric felt. Maybe it helps "neutrals" to see that doing nothing in these cases is not "neutral" at all...
ProfPosky
OOO, I love this! I like Luna more and more, the more I think about her - she seems very deep to me, just the sort of person who would look for someone for years, just so she could help him. I also think you've done a great job with her mother. "I should have been able to keep you from all harm, especially when you were a baby..." every mother feels that. Well, I do...
Author's Response: Thanks a lot. I wrought this in a hury, so I am happy somone liked it. My BETA thought that Luna was a little to emo, I am happy you liked her. Thanks for the review,
avenger
LOL at myself - it took me a minute or two to figure out why he was worrying about more bunnies in a month...
As usual, the quality of your prose is almost alarming. I have no idea how hard you have to work to get it to flow that way, or if it just comes naturally to you, but I always enjoy it. (I have deep suspicions about the parrallel construction or lack thereof in that sentence, but I will keep them almost to myself...)
The most startling thing to me about this story to me was the almost human quality to Bella. She is so far gone by time we see her in canon, even at her youngest, that it is difficult to imagine that she was ever just revolting, as opposed to revoltingly violent and insane.
I AM enjoying trying to picture the look on Sirius's face at an owl actually arriving at his uncle's farm for him... except that it is actually painful to think of him hoping it's a letter from Lily, and then discovering it's a letter from Sirius.
On the other hand, AU wise, what if Sirius HAD been that bored, and somehow they HAD struck up a correspondence... that would definately be worth reading...
ProfPosky
Author's Response: Another bunny? *whimper*
In answer to the half-question, after a few years of slaving away at grammar, punctuation, rhythm, imagery, dialogue, rhyme, and allusion, it now comes spontaneously. Sort of like playing scales. Bella\'s almost-humanity surprises me a little, though, as I wasn\'t really aiming for her to have or not have any. She is, as you say, revolting all the same, but hasn\'t had her years of Azkaban yet. Thanks for the review!
My favortie lin here is "What was lost was recovered once again."
Do my eyes deceive me, or is this almost a sonnet? Have you tried it without the isolated line to see how you like it? I've always loved the sonnet form myself, but have never succeedes in writing one...Hmmm, maybe I should try again...Thanks for the inspiration to attempt a difficult format!
Author's Response: Yes. Its a Petrarchian sonnet. I studied it at school, and decided to give it a try. I am so glad you liked it.
An interesting look at Fleur, not at all the usual "Fleur is a stuck-up-#@%" we so often see. This is, I think, much closer to how Canon Fleur might have felt. I got a particular enjoyment out of Lurent nudging Maurice, who nudges Gaston...
Author's Response: Thanks so much. Every time I get a review I get so excited! I\'m glad you liked it. Yes, I actually liked Fleur during the canon, so I wanted to show her in a better light. Just a warning she is a little nasty at times, when she gets upset.
I laughed. Well, I grinned very widely...even though I do think it is a little unfair that Ravenclaws can get any book they want in the whole castle that easily. Some of the rest of us also like to read...(smiling)
Author's Response: Yes, well, if you would have Sorted properly (or at least petitioned for a house change like VV wants you to) you could be in on the fun as well. *grin* And there\'s nothing stopping you from actually asking Madam Pince....
Made me chuckle! Don't we all wish it were true...
Author's Response: Yeah. I think Ginny would be a pretty cool friend. That\'s probably why I had this idea in the first place.
I'm enjoying this story, although I would love a little mroe detail...How Ironic that Draco and Harry should suffer the same fate... But who is Lucius' mother? Are we going to see how he becomes friends with Emily - it's a little abrupt...
Author's Response: I never really thought about it when I was writing, but it is ironic how Draco and Harry suffered the same fate. I\'m not going to continue on this story, though; it\'s a one-shot. But thanks for the review!
Very interesting view of Snape's decision-making process. I suppose that when it comes down to the choice between fire and ice for the end of the world, we know what he's betting on.
I'm glad to see someone used teir time away from the forums well. All I managed was getting Neville's gran into Madam Puddifoot's and snagging a good table for Luna and Ginny in the library...
Author's Response: Severus just dropped in to say he\'s betting on prats raining from the sky, but he seems to be in one of those moods today. This is actually an older sketch I dug up and still liked, so my time away from the forums was more of a git-er-done thing on the Masters. I\'m looking forward to your Neville! Thanks for the review!
Well, well, what a scene to come home to, and they are both going to be blue, as well... I'm intrigued to find out just how Maeve will deal with this - I am thinking it must be that "Tea" Peter had, and that the look on Hermione and Severus's faces when the spell wears off is going to be priceless...
Author's Response: I know! Poor Maeve. It\'s all Jenna\'s fault. I\'m also wondering how Maeve will deal with this, because I\'ve never put her through anything quite so horrible before. Thank you for reviewing!
Oh, amAzing... My absolutely favorite line was "With the loss of her underwear came the loss of her rationality" - Truer words were never spoken, and I practically fell on the floor, howling with laughter. Somehow I'm sure you'll make it all come out right in the end, probably without even having to resort to memory charms all around, or I would be crying...
I like it. I had enver thought of any of Draco's nastiness to arry coming from Harry refusing to shake his hand, but now that I've read it, of course it makes perfect sense.
It also makes me wonder - what if Draco made that comment about different wizarding families in the hopes of impressing Harry - not that he didn't believe it, but what if he hadn't said it? If he had just said he was Draco Malfoy, extended his hand, wouldn't Harry have shook it? Wouldn't Draco's life have had the potential to be very different?
I don't suppose there is any chance you're going to write your version of where Harry goes from that rock?
Author's Response: ProfPosky -
Thanks for reviewing! Sorry it took me so long but I never got an email telling me I had reviews. I feel so bad.
That is a valid idea. I believe Draco\'s life (not to mention Harry\'s) would have been different if Harry had shook Draco\'s hand. Their relationship wouldn\'t be quite so... explosive.
Hmm... I\'ll have to think about writing a sequel (of a sort) for Harry. I have to figure out what happens. :) Any suggestions?
Thanks again!
Siri
08.31.06
Poor Lily...Slughorn, following her with his eyes, and maybe she is being hypersensitive, and maybe she isn't...You know, if a teacher had been leering at me when I was 16 I doubt I would have even realized it. You know, she ought to ask McGonagall's advice as a female, or Poppy's, and she never will, because it hasn't occurred to her so far that they are not only authority figures, but fellow women as well.
What a particularly unappealing addition to what we know about Carter (What those of us who've read ItEoO--Do we really know anything at all about him from Canon? Was he even in?) But then, it is so sad about him and Annie...
(if you haven't read it, get with the program, people...)
Author's Response: And maybe he\'s just watching her because she\'s shrinking so, and he wonders what\'s wrong -- and maybe not. It\'s a tricky thing for her to ask about, isn\'t it? McGonagall would probably breathe fire at the very idea, too.
Unappealing? Yep, Carter is a soft-bodied and sneaky math geek. A basically good sort, though. He\'s an OC, found nowhere in canon. Thanks for the promo, and the review!
Slick!
Author's Response: Lol. So NOT the first word I think of. And VV would say it\'s all about \'SEX and DEATH\' like an opera. *huggles you*