NO! THAT'S how Andrew died! Nooo, I was starting to like him!

Well done on the Fleur-Maudie interaction. And hmm, the plot thickens. So Mags got the book from Andrew. How did he get it though? Unless he's a wizard? But why would he go to a Muggle school then? So many questions...

Why do I feel that Andrew Carlton will make all the sense? Hmm. Maybe it's just my own high suspicion index (I think that's what it's called). And I loved reading Dom's back-story. Her and Maudie's meeting was very interesting!

Moving on to the next chapter...

Author's Response: I am not going to lie. I've written a few death scenes, but this one has moved me the most. :(

This was delicious. It was so thrilling in the beginning, and touching towards the end. You made me feel worse for Andrew. :(

I didn't expect Maudie to take his shape, though (that was Maudie, wasn't it?) It was so gripping, the way Mags finally reunited her own body and soul. I didn't expect that -- at least, I thought that some physical magic might be involved.

I can imagine how enjoyable this chapter was to write. I love writing the chapter that resolves everything too. It's amazing that you're so clear with your characters, and your writing is so defined, that you don't need to name who is talking, when you write in first person.

Wow. This was an amazing story. I still have no words for the brilliance of it, and the richness of the plot. I couldn't produce something like this, even if I tried (and even then, the only proper thriller I have on here is like 26 chapters long, and I'm pretty sure that 7 installments wouldn't have solved anything).

Author's Response: Originally, Mags was supposed to unite body and soul with a lot of physical magic, but as the story progressed on the doc, I began to feel that Mags's real problem is truly psychological. Her biggest problem is her inability to face her guilt surrounding Andrew's murder. She's almost blocked them for her consciousness, which is why Dom couldn't access them easily. It's only when Mags starts feeling better about herself (though, really, as Dom, who's more guilt-free), that her defence goes down.

Hey Jess!

I must warn you, this is not going to be very SPEW-y, because it gave me a lot of feels as I read, and also because the message you were trying to send across through this really touched me.

Anyway, I was waiting to read this ever since that fantastic LoveNote for Ellie. I didn't guess that it was you, but it was so well written, I'd decided to find out and prod the person towards completing this.

I like how this fic is so different, and well thought-out, and how you have managed to make it a wonderful piece about bullying, which just seems to be getting worse as time passes. I can certainly see it happening in the next-generation in a worse way than what it was during Harry’s time at Hogwarts (when I was in school, bullying was stealing lunch money. My brother, however, has classmates who isolate one boy a day so they can kick him in the place it hurts the most). And the overall consequences of the bullying are so sad, I was left feeling rather terrible for Albus towards the end.

I loved Albus's character. I always love the various ways in which he's portrayed, but your Al blew me over. He's so sweet, as usual, but also, his weaknesses are clearly defined-- with the stealing and all, but I guess that comes with addiction. I also liked that he was closer to Ginny. That’s not an angle that we see very often, because of the epilogue, but I completely agree with you. I think Ginny would have been better with Albus, as compared to Harry. Mostly because Albus would always find a need to meet his dad’s expectations (whether they’re very high or not). There would be a certain pressure upon him because he’s Harry Potter’s son, and this, I think, could have been properly balanced out by Ginny.

I rather liked Scorpius too. He had a tinge of Draco, I think, but he’s kinder. I’m glad he took up some of the punishment too. :) Also, the fact that he felt guilty enough to come back and actually apologise to Albus was a nice addition. Now that has left me wondering is anything ever happened between the two of them later on. I hope it did!

The Hogsmeade scene, which I can recognise as the original lovenote, is very well written. I loved the “stiffy against my thigh” dialogue -- probably because it sounded so typical of teenagers. The kiss was well written too, and Scorpius noticing the colour of Albus’s eyes made me grin.

The writing style, oh Queen, is as flawless as you. You have such an engaging, interesting way of presenting your work! Nothing is ever awkward, and the whole story was so smooth. I also loved the amount of research you seem to have conducted upon the potion. I certainly wouldn’t find that interesting as a task, and I realise it would have taken you a lot of patience too.

This is such a lovely story, Jess! I wish I could make this into a full-fledged SPEW review, but I think I’m just too excited and happy to read this. But wow! What a fabulous story! Thank you for expanding on this! :D *hugsss*

Author's Response:

I really wanted to do this review justice by having an epic response, but I regret to inform you that after several attempts, that is a pretty much failed venture. This shall be me flailing about you flailing. :D

I think you picked up a lot of how I wanted Al to be portrayed in this story. The kid we saw in the epilogue was scared of disappointing anyone or being not good enough, so I thought that could be interpreted as a boy who keeps to himself to avoid letting down friends by not being enough. Of course, we both know that's nonsense and that he has a lot to offer, but when he can purport himself as if nothing is wrong, hardly anyone will notice that he's struggling with self esteem on the inside. Add a douchebag bully who insults a very private part of his life, and you've got a recipe for disaster.

Now, the dream sequence was a bit tricky, and Soraya and I did quibble over it a bit. The issue we both had is if this first taste of kissing someone of the preferred gender could elicit the sort of dreams that Al was having. However, since teenage boys have those sorts of dreams on their own, I thought it would be plausible given the proper stimulus. Add a helping of shame on Albus's part because he felt dirty and sullied after Scorpius's little bet, and you have a kid looking desperately for a way to put it from his mind.

The prolonged dreams were actually the result of Albus self-medicating, and when he stopped self-medicating, he started to have withdrawal symptoms (which, with valerian, can manifest as delusions in males...not sure why with females). And naturally, he couldn't ask anyone for help, since he'd already started stealing from the potions cupboard. And being in the medical field, I'm sure you've learned about drug-seeking behaviour and the things people will do to get a fix.

Scorpius, for the lack of a better term, is a typical, stupid teenager. He is self-centred and doesn't think about his actions much before he does them. I bet that, in his mind, he convinced himself that Albus would laugh that Hogsmeade incident off and that nothing bad would happen other than fulfilling a bet and winning ten galleons. He probably had no idea how cruel his actions were until he saw the result of them. Sure, he didn't put the potion into Al's hands, but he might as well have done. He had a boy who was pretty much okay with his sexuality be ashamed of how his body reacts to sexual stimulae, which is an almost unforgivable thing to do to a young man struggling to figure out who he is.

Even if the readers could've dealt with having no closure between Scorpius and Albus, I felt like I couldn't let that stand. Albus isn't Harry, and Scorpius isn't Draco. While both are influences, I felt like they were both different enough people to where they would need to react in ways contradictory to how their fathers would've done. That's why I needed Ginny to be the parent Al connected with the most. He requires flexibility and support, which are two things that, given his life experiences, Harry probably couldn't give as well as Ginny. Ginny is a survivor, and Al needed that kind of support to deal with this. whole mess. Plus, I'm proud of myself for being nice to her, as she's high on the list of my least favourite characters.

Thank youuuuu for the squees about my writing. I do have to say that Soraya and her magic beta-ly highlighter had a good bit to do with that. She knows my foibles and how to point them out, so I get the chance to work on those and refine things. I'm not much of a dialogue person, but I'm glad that it felt right to you as a reader.

Thank you for the lovely review, for which you must never apologise. Reviews like this one are rare breeds on most sites, and most authors would give their left boob to get one. :) Thanks for stopping in, and I'm glad you enjoyed the story!

~Jess

Hey Carole!

I’ve wanted to check this one out for a while -- because in all honesty, I think I’ve secretly shipped Seamus and Dean for a long time now. It’s just that I haven’t seen many Seamus or Dean-centric stories, which is why this intrigued me when you took up the challenge.

I really enjoyed this fic, I must say. It had humour and angst, darkness and a bit of romance, and everything was mixed in the right proportion. I loved how you got into Seamus’s mind to write this, his Irish mind at that, ha, because rarely have I seen characterisation in the narrative, rather than action and dialogue. So this was new and wonderful for me.

I loved how you began the fic with Seamus’s regrets, and explained how he usually tried to hide his real emotions and regrets behind laughter. And then the chronological run-through of his regrets was very well done too. I loved how subtle it was -- how he only regretted persuading Dean to go out with Ginny, without thinking of the real reason behind it. Because here, you haven’t suddenly made them a couple in the end. It’s like, both Seamus and Dean know, deep inside, how they feel for each other, but have just been ignoring it all the while.

Then you went on to describe Seamus’s family life, which is quite an unexplored topic. At least, I’ve never read of it in fanfiction, and it was interesting to read about him. Also, I did not think that he was likely to be Sorted into Hufflepuff, but you‘re right. He was loyal to his mother, loyal to his family, and that would most definitely qualify him to be a Hufflepuff. Also, it explains why at first, he didn’t believe Harry, and chose to go with what his mother had said.

This brings me to the next point: Seamus and Dean getting to talk about whether or not they believed in what Harry had said. I think this scene was important, very important. Dean believes in Harry’s words, and Seamus doesn’t, but when they talk about it. Seamus screwed up his face as he thought about it, but there wasn’t much to say. Much as he’d love to have someone on his side, he preferred Dean watching his back, and he wasn’t letting anything get between that. Seamus, as you have described until now, is fiercely loyal to his family. He has gone against Harry and Ron, and is not talking to Neville. But then the fierceness reduces when it comes to one person: Dean. I think this was a perfect place to subtly hint at what was happening later (though I already knew, because of the warnings, and the fact that this was written for the Cotillion).

So basically, I think the relationship between your two characters was well described. I loved the leg-pulling, and the friendly exchanges. Even when they advanced from mere friendship in the end, nothing was overdone: they were still the same; only more physical than they had been before, because they took their friendship a step further. However, you didn’t leave out the slight tension between them, and I was enjoying all of it, unresolved, and resolved.

I enjoyed the scene before Dumbledore’s funeral, with Seamus finally letting his guard down. Dean’s awkwardness worried me for a bit, but I think all he needed was the months away from his best mate to figure out what he felt for him. However, I felt a sadness at the fact that they were separated for months before they could figure out what they felt for each other. It was cruel, but it was necessary.

I loved it when you got to the battle. Finally, all the emotions were getting sorted, and then the relief that they’d both survived it. The kiss at the end was very well written, and I bet Harry was unaware of what was going on in his dorm when he stumbled into it, ha! But I was glad that the relationship got closure, that Seamus and Dean finally figured out what was going on between them.

All-in-all, I really enjoyed this story. It was amazing, I must say, and it had me grinning and frowning all through, and secretly celebrating when they got together. It was a character study of Seamus, on the whole, that I enjoyed, and I think, for the glimpses of Dean that we got, he was written perfectly too. The plot is very good, and the writing was captivating. Great work, Carole, and all the best for the Cotillion!

Pooja

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this lovely review and I must apologise for taking so long to respond, but I was too blown away to think of an adequate response. I did love writing this story because I think I love the bromance of Seamus and Dean so much. I hope it shows, really, that they're friends far more than lovers - ha ha. I wonder how this would pan out long term, but hope they'd always have each other in some form. Thank you again ~Carole

Hey Gina,

I read this fic a while ago, but was unable to formulate a fully coherent review without sounding like a fangirl, so I’ve been taking my time composing this. However, I hope that my thoughts come out in the form of a proper review this time. :)

I must say, I like the concept of this story very, very much. It’s so different. I’ve never seen this version of Harry after the war, and hence, I may never have considered this a possible scenario. However, after reading your story, I can see why Harry would be in this state of mind. I can visualise his obsession towards catching all the Death Eaters and his infatuation to staying busy and working harder and harder. It’s just something Harry would do, and this is very good characterisation of him. Also, you managed to gain my sympathy for Harry without using Harry’s point of view to reflect his mental state. I think this is one of the things about the story that makes it brilliant.

Speaking of characterisation: I loved how every major and minor character in this story is kept in character. You have fleshed them all out crystal-clear and it’s so compliant with the book that it doesn’t seem like fanfiction at all. Minerva, Aberforth, and like I’ve mentioned above, Harry, take the cake here. Minerva’s concern for Harry is very like her, and Aberforth -- I really liked him, because he’s so positive. He seems uncaring, but, like Minerva observes, he really seems to care. So, honestly, I think one of your major strengths here is your characterisation and character development. It’s simply amazing.

I think this fic teaches us a good lesson too -- that all of us have our bad days, and those moments where we can’t seem to go on; but we finally do pick ourselves up and walk on. This cast a very bright light on the dark, bleak path that the story was taking until then. Also, we all know that Harry survived any such rough patches after the war, at least until Albus went to Hogwarts, yet, I couldn’t help but feel sad and anxious for him, just as Minerva and the others felt. This is another strength of your writing style -- it’s so powerful, that you have managed to manipulate the moods of the readers as well, despite them knowing how this all ends.

I think the one uplifting line in this fic is very powerful too. "Then so what if he needs to lie down and rest a bit," snapped Aberforth. "He's earned it. But mark my word: Potter will get up. It was the one thing in this world my brother was most sure of." This line just acted like a buoy -- it pulled me from the depths of despair, and I found myself smiling, because it’s so full of hope and positivity. It’s such a lovely line, and I’m so glad that it came.

Another brilliant thing about this story is how Harry is the main character here, without really being in the scene that you’ve portrayed. It could be tedious to just have characters refer to your main character of the story without him or her physically being there, as it becomes difficult to connect with one character from another character’s thought process, without the inclusion of dialogue, if that makes any sense. But here, it seemed like Harry was physically part of the scene, and not just a passive character. Also, there isn’t much dialogue in this story at all, and that struck me as very different and appealing. I think it added to the feel of the story.

All-in-all, this is a gem of a story, and I’m glad I read it. Your stories, especially your Marauder ones have been on my reading list for ages, and I promise to act upon this list soon, as soon as I control a certain addiction that you know well about. To sum it up, I think you’re a wonderful, powerful writer, and that you have a very strong grasp on characterisation. Your writing style is unique -- fantastic, even, and I thoroughly enjoyed the beauty of this piece. So yes, I really, really adored this story. :)

Great job!

Pooja

Oh, you know, I couldn't review yesterday because of Peeves, but OMG!

I want to make this SPEW-ly -- so badly, but all I can say is WOOOOOWWWWWWW!

I mean, I've never seen such a fic ever before! Can it get any better? SERIOUSLY!

Agh, it's definitely lost any SPEW-liness, but yeah, this is really awesome, Nat, keep up the good work. Gah, I wish there were more stories like this!

Just... wow. :D

Author's Response: YAYAYAY! This must means all my medical references were correct! :D Glad you liked it and thanks for reviewingggg!

Hey, Ellie!

I saw a few days ago that you had posted this, and was intrigued, but when I read the summary before opening the link to the story today, I was even more intrigued. The truth is, I don’t think I’ve ever read such a story, or even such a concept before. It was so poignant, sweet and magical. I really, really enjoyed it.

Let me begin with the writing style. Your whole method — all your sentence structures, and everything, they resonated with a magical sensation inside me. I’m repeating myself, I know, but there is something surreal and transcendent about the way you’ve handled this. I’ve read a few of your stories, and you tend to lean more heavily on emotion, but this was full of description. You concentrated on creating an atmosphere — a premise for wonder. It was almost poetic, and it didn’t have much dialogue, so it was rather silent, and yet the story spoke about a lot.

Your descriptive writing was lovely too. The way you’ve written about the statues, stating every feature, expressing everything about them, I could imagine it all. When they transformed to humans, especially, I was very fond of how you wrote. It starts at the very tips of her fingers; they soften and gain human wrinkles as they darkenThis would be my favourite line in the entire story, because I saw it — her skin darkening, the creases along her palm forming, the tiny lines on her skin making themselves evident, clothes and hair falling loose… it was a majestically written portion, really. I can’t see her, I don’t know what she looks like, but her description made her look beautiful, and by now, just like the male statue, I was also eager to have a glance at this woman.

The male statue, on that account, was wonderfully written. His feelings and thoughts have been well-expressed, and I loved how they always seemed to circle the other statue. Also, I love how much both the statues (and I shall call them Colin and Luna, since that’s what they named themselves later on) seemed to observe everything around them. But I reckon that’s what a statue could do, after all. The naming was also apt — poignant, because the statues would never find out what happened to Colin Creevey. I’m not surprised that Luna spoke to her namesake, and I find that single line a wonderful way to express Luna Lovegood’s character.

The romantic overtones in the story were subtle and well-done. I enjoyed how it all lay on how much Colin and Luna observed each other. I loved reading about the wonderfulness of feeling grass for the first time and looking at the stars. The kiss too was coming and was well-placed. It was sweet and sexy, and I loved that particular moment.

Of course, I was very sad when Colin and Luna had to go back to being statues, but I liked the lesson we learned from this story. The whole Harry Potter series stresses on how death is an essential once we get life, and this one proves it. I loved how you expressed that eternity seems lovely when you look at it from the pained eyes of having watched death, but in actuality, it is better that we are the way we are.

Your story gave me a lot to think about, and my day is ending on a very bittersweet, positive note. I definitely loved this, and will be keeping it in mind for the QSQs next year. Lovely story. Well done! :)

Pooja

Author's Response: Pooja!!!!! I honestly haven't been able to respond to this review because I haven't been able to find words. I know it was an honestly weird idea, and I'm glad I didn't scare you off, lol.

I'm thrilled that you loved the writing style. I was definitely trying to write more descriptively, because the piece felt more of doing than saying, and for me that's always been a challenge. THe moment you mention, when 'Luna' starts to change - that was the most vivid moment I could see in my head when writing it, and I'm amazed that it carried over. Also, I wanted to stay more away from dialogue simply because I wasn't sure exactly how much they knew, how much they would be able to talk about. I had to think about what it would be reasonable for them to hear about in everyday conversation of Hogwart's students, what they could connect words and ideas to, and by that reasoning I had to take 'stars' out of their language.

In my head, these statues were made either just as or right after Hogwarts was. They've only ever 'seen' that one corner of the castle, and after a thousand years (literally) of only having that limited range of vision, I felt he would know every detail like the back of his hand. When I decided they were going to name themselves, and that they would be Hogwart's students' names, only two recognizable characters came to mind. Colin, because he was always a bit of a loner and would love the opportunity to photograph them, and Luna, because she would read into their stance. I feel like she would talk to the statues, and so Colin and Luna became their names. :)

The romance was because I honestly couldn't picture two people who've been stuck with each other for such a long time, without knowing who the other is, who wouldn't fall in love with each other. He spent so much time just staring at her, memorizing every detail, and she could only wonder what he looked like. I'm also glad you enjoyed the kiss. :) And as much as I would love to, I couldn't keep them human forever, because they weren't. I think that art and humans are envious of each other; humans because they want to be that immortalized beauty, that no one will forget and it will never die, but the art because they want to feel like the humans do, and don't want to be stuck there forever. It just seemed to fit, and I'm glad that that point made it's way across.

Honestly, I'm sitting here grinning like an idiot at this review. I am so unbelievably glad that you enjoyed it, and just thank you for reading and leaving such an amazing review.

Ellie