This story brought tears to my eyes. I loved every word-- definately one of your best stories. Some of the things I liked most:

- The details! I loved the little things, like Ron's Quidditch shirt in the hippogriff picture and the apple-scent of Hermione's hair. Very inspired!

- The medium! The 'unread' letter to Ron's dead love is very powerful. You get a true concept of his grief and his deepest feelings. (That was the part where I started crying.)

- The character of Harriet! She was perfect. I loved her Weasley temper combined with Hermione's warmth and latent sensitivity. Couldn't you please, please, please write another story about her? She is too good to leave in a one shot...

Three quick things:

In the letter: "'She said Dadda.' How I lover to hear her say this." ---- lover should be love.

And earlier: "The ribbon glistened and shined against the glowing wood, each strand illuminated by the sunlight flowing through the open window." --- is 'shined' right? Isn't 'shone' more proper? (I'm not sure myself so ignore me if I am wrong.)

One last thing: would the whole floor around Harriet have been wet with her tears? Seems almost like overkill. I've never seen anyone cry that much (except Alice from Alice in Wonderland-- book, not movie-- err, ahem, pay no attention to the random tangent...)

Wonderful one-shot!

Pax.

Author's Response: So this one was really that good, huh? That\'s what I\'ve been getting, and this was the very first fanfic I ever wrote. I\'m amazed that it went over so well.

The inspiration for this story came from Taylor Swift\'s song \'Tim McGraw\'. The lyrics- And underneath my bed, is a letter that you never read, from three summers back. I was listening to it last summer and BAM, plotline.

Thanks for the corrections, I never took the time to look this one over, so thanks again!

Comments: Cute, and a great tribute to the artwork of mudblood428 (long live her excellent stories). You built a story off of one of my all-time favorite scenes from HP. Somehow I couldn't see Harry doing that in the common room. He is a fairly private person, don't you think?

Suggestions: None!

Bravo on the completion of your first fan fic.

Pax.

A nice start. It's a bit rough around the edges in places. The transitions between Harry and Ginny's pov are somewhat jarring. There are a few minor grammatical errors you might want to scan for-- example: Ginny had been there, standing next to Harry, daring not to look him in the eye. (might want to change it to 'not daring to look him...')

Nice job. Exciting to see a new story starting.

Pax.

I really liked this one shot. I felt like is was a good explanation for James and Lily's ultimate love and understanding. Good job! The story was sweet and simple-- I liked the fact that it didn't have any 'frills.'

The first two or three paragraphs needed some work. Several sentences were grammatically unclear and seemed kind of choppy. One example is: "He had never seen their beds empty, usually one to leave for the holidays himself." I know what you are saying, I just think you could say it better.

I'm off to read another one of your stories (and review, of course!)

Pax.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review, glad you liked it! Hmm, that sentence seems fine to me. I actually like the way it\'s written. How do you think I should rephrase it, exactly?

Aww! A cliffie?

Excellent chapter, but too short. It had just hit its stride when you stopped. The gradual build of information was so abruptly chopped off!

Your story is truly amazing. You have created a host of new characters that the reader can care about. Plus your seamless integration of Italian/European magic and customs and the 'familiar' British magical community is superbly done.

I continue to follow this series faithfully!
~Fauna

Author's Response: Too Short?? It was 3477 words. I'm glad you're enjoying the illustration of Italian and British magick, and I'm very pleased to see that you're reading faithfully. I hear from so few people, although it's obvious that many are reading. A bit disappointing, so when I get messages from reviewers, I'm thrilled. Thank you. Dani

I like your work so much. This is an excellent example of what you do best-- the original and unexpected. Your decision to use the second person combined with Marcus' letters is fresh and thought-provoking. I don't think many authors could pull it off, but you managed to perfectly convey the mood and atmosphere you described on your author's note: the slightly disjointed thoughts a confused child-- that indescribable mixture of what is handed down from elders and what comes to be in the individual child.

This story fits well with the style you chose for Fools in Love. The two together give a rounded, complete idea of who Marcus was and were he came from, why he is different and yet why he complies outwardly with his family's creed.

Superb! Keep writing (and please don't abandon Warped Image-- I'm hooked!)

Pax.

Author's Response: Aww. Sorry Warped Image failed. :( A sub-plot as been revamped -- with better writing -- in Accursed Miracle. I found myself wanting to write different characters, so I did. I'm glad you liked Fools in Love, too. It's a bit sappier than my usual fare, but meh. What do you do? I hope more unexpected stuff starts flowing from my brain soon. :) Marcus may return (because I know what happens to him after Fools in Love), and he's such an interesting character for me to write. He seems to fit well into the Potterverse and the tangled lives of the Malfoy family.

Author's Response: Aww. Sorry Warped Image failed. :( A sub-plot as been revamped -- with better writing -- in Accursed Miracle. I found myself wanting to write different characters, so I did. I'm glad you liked Fools in Love, too. It's a bit sappier than my usual fare, but meh. What do you do? I hope more unexpected stuff starts flowing from my brain soon. :) Marcus may return (because I know what happens to him after Fools in Love), and he's such an interesting character for me to write. He seems to fit well into the Potterverse and the tangled lives of the Malfoy family.

Author's Response: Aww. Sorry Warped Image failed. :( A sub-plot as been revamped -- with better writing -- in Accursed Miracle. I found myself wanting to write different characters, so I did. I'm glad you liked Fools in Love, too. It's a bit sappier than my usual fare, but meh. What do you do? I hope more unexpected stuff starts flowing from my brain soon. :) Marcus may return (because I know what happens to him after Fools in Love), and he's such an interesting character for me to write. He seems to fit well into the Potterverse and the tangled lives of the Malfoy family.

Poor Cho. I think you choose the right female HP character for this story. She is an emotionally broken girl, and I don't think anyone cared for her properly after Cedric died.

This story felt like a cautionary tale, and I don't mean that in a bad way. You never once had to say 'Cho is being manipulated,' we just knew it was true. It is such a shame no one really understood her. Even her mother didn't seem to be handling the problem as well as she should have.

I liked the fact that you ended the story where you did. The reader feels sure that she will either loose the baby or mother and child will continue to suffer abuse. Hopefully someone will eventually really help her heal her heart and mind.

Anyway, these are probably things you know already. After all you are the author!

Thanks for the great read, BloodRayne.
~FaunaCaritas

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your kind words, Fauna!

I loved it! A clever missing moment idea-- it crossed my mind once, and I'm thrilled an author decided to write it and do such a good job. It seems kind of rare to find fan fics about Ginny when he was running after Cho. Poor kid, it must have hurt.

I loved the last line. A very 'in character' thought for Ginny to have. She is a fighter.

Anyway, all the best.

Pax.

Author's Response: Thanks! :D

Seems very interesting... you have me wondering what has happened and where the story is going. It is a bit hard to get into right now because, as a reader, I have no idea what to think yet. The writing seems good, so I'll give chapter 2 a go.

One correction:
Missing letter: "But I also know that you cannot continue on with this train of hatred that you old against Rowena." old --> hold

You have probably got used to me by now. I'm going through all your stories. I try to review everything I read (unless I absolutlely hate it-- NOT the case with your stuff.)

You have lots of talent. More stories, please!

Pax.

Author's Response: Gracias senorita!

Yes, this is another story that I think I did not do my best on. It was for the Gauntlet Challenge, so I have no idea how I placed a second. I was extremely shocked.

Oh, and thanks also for the correction. *fixing now*

Interesting... what was the challenge? I liked how you laid out the story and carried it through. The very last room really baffeled me. What was it supposed to do/be?

Well, I liked the story. It would have felt more natural in the context of a longer story. It was hard to relate to Helga because there was no initial 'build up' of her character. Let me try to clarify... In your story 'A Letter Never Read' we get introduced to Harriet slowly-- we learn about her 'Ronish' traits and her 'Hermioneish' traits. That makes us care about her-- feel her loneliness, etc. In this story I didn't start caring about Helga's feelings until the middle of chapter 2.

Probably these thoughts don't relate to this story because of its 'gauntlet challenge' nature. You don't have any problem building up lovable, believable characters in your other stories.

One minor thing had me confused. When Helga is in the last room you write: "I’m going to die, Helga thought, panic completely taking over her mind. She tried to run forward, but found that she was unable to move anymore. Suddenly, a noise just to her left caught Helga attention, and she was able to struggle forward toward it. She wasn’t frightened in the least. She just wanted an escape." --- Doesn't that seem like a contradiction? Panic is overtaking her but she is not frightened in the least? Panic and fright are not identical, but I usually do not have one without the other.

Hmm, I can't think of anything else to say. I think I only have one or two of your stories left to read. I will be sad to reach the end of your writings so far. Maybe you could write another story very soon or post another chapter of 'Lovers in the Moonlight,' pretty, pretty, please?

Pax.

Author's Response: The challenge was to pick any cannon character and have them go through the Department of Mysteries. We were given a new room each time we completed the previous one. The last room I had a bit of trouble with. We were only given that it was a completely black room with tons of pressure. I wasn\'t very sure of how to write it, so...

I think I was indicating that she wasn\'t afraid of what she would find, as she was already terrified.

Yes, yes more are on their way! As is another chapter os Lovers in the Moonlight. I had to take a long break from that to write this and the May One-shot Challenge.

Thanks for the great review!