writing my own story. It's taking forever. I also like to read what others write.
"a sixth year had borrowed him her transfiguration book" Sorry to nitpick but my inner ESL teacher(English as a second language) must emerge. Should be either a sixth year had lent him her book or a sixth year had let him borrow her transfiguration book. Otherwise an excellant chapter.
sorry to nitpick. Should be fun childhood or happy childhood not funny. I like the way you try to convey that thirteen years with dementers does affect people even after they leave.
good chapter. many layers of deception here.
I'll just echo what was said previously. Molly is older than the Marauders but it's quite obvious why you needed her at Hogwarts. I too saw Back to the Future.
good story.
Author's Response: Back to the Future is amazing - I love it!
Actually, Molly could be replaced by someone else, I suppose, very easily. I kept all your Molly-comments in mind when I wrote other fanfictions!
Still enjoying the story. Keep up the good work
Author's Response: Aw, thanks. I'll keep working on it. ^^
Kind of neat that you made this story about Ron and not Harry.
Author's Response: Hehe, thanks. Ron deserves more credit than he gets.
This definitely isn't canon Draco or even canon Narcissa. Neither of them would give muggles the time of day. Nonetheless there seems to be a bit of a mystery. So for your story I will accept Draco as is.
good questions raised by Draco. Now the important one-when will they get answered?
nice tantalizing tidbits.
Just to nitpick. Draco bribes? the guard at the dragon preserve but doesn't pay Madame Rosmerta?
Author's Response: He doesn't bribe the guard at the preserve, he just pays her for entering, as it proably costs a lot to keep so many dragons. sorry if it wasn't clear. thanks for your review!
Is this really the end?
Interesting how you define Bella. Vulnerable yet trying to make believe she's in charge of her life.
Author's Response: It has been my own experience in life that when I was most vulnerable was during the times I thought I had control. Thank you very much for reading. :)~Llew
Nice parallel between the death of Bella's mother and that of Voldemorts
Author's Response: Thank you. I wanted to establish a connection between them that would link him to her in a way that he wasn't linked to any of his other Death Eaters. I want to show that he becomes a sort of Father Figure to her where her own father is severely lacking.
You make Bella a very complex character. I can almost see a possible redemption for her if she so chooses. But we know she won't.
Excellant way of describing her first death. Gives tangible meaning to the word Death Eater.
Now that I figured how to properly log on, I just wanted to say good job.
lousy Christmas. pressure from father to follow in family footsteps. Mother saying his life is based on a lie. No one to turn to. Afraid to talk to Sarafina. good detail
very plausible reason for luring Snape to the Whomping Willow. I also like the fact that Lupin isn't totally nice- that he actually could be jealous of Snape.
Author's Response: Thanks for your reviews! I was trying to come up with reasons for the Whomping Willow incident and also the scene from "Snape's Worst Memory" where Lupin ignores what his friends are doing, turning a blind eye because he is angry at Snape.