Ok- about me. I'm 16 and live in Colorado. I love writing, and want to be an author someday. I also LOVE to read, and fanfiction is awesome. I've slipped into the realm of original work lately, however, and I will not be able to devote too much time to fanfiction anymore. Every story will finish, however. Please be patient with me.
Story status:
Predestined
Chapter 15 up, chapter 16 in the works. Yes, I know that it's been forever since I updated it, but I'm still only at a few hundred words for the next chapter, I've just been so busy! Go to my livejournal if you want to see a preview!
Too Late
Finished, a one-shot.
The Moment
Finished, a one-shot.
The Epic Tale of Bad Hair
Chapter 2 in queue. Yes, this is now going to be a chaptered fanfiction.
Wow I have to follow up a REALLY long review... I really liked this chapter. Why wouldn't Mrs. Weasley let Ginny out to practice, though? She let the boys out in previous books, but then again Ginny is her only girl and the baby of the family. Good use of onomatopoeia while describing the flying scene, and you almost made me feel sorry for Draco in a fic where he's still a cold character! This story is progressing nicely, keep it up!
Author's Response: I am so glad you liked this chapter... About the Mrs. Weasley thing, part of it is what you said and part of it is that everyone knows Voldemort is back, so he might not be afraid to strike. (the sky is not too safe) Again I am really glad you like it. Keep reading and reviewing!
Yes! The sequel is up! 10! 10! 10! Who would have thought that Hermione would be a stay-at-home-mom?!? And I suppose that the Malfoys are keeping their distance from Ron after that one incident...
Author's Response: Yeah...well thanx!
Wow- that was sorta scary. I'm with Sidney- eek! LOL Anyways, loved the chapter and I thought that the ending was absolutely dahling! Please update soon!
Author's Response: yeah but thanx!! :)
Wow- love the new story- it's great! Hoping to see an update soon!
I accidentaly gave it the wrong score- oops. Anyways- Ginny's a clown in this one- it's awesome- about to pop! LOL
Author's Response: I'm hoping to make Ginny a light hearted character in this story - there's going to be so much drama everywhere else, I'll need her for comic relief. We'll see how it all goes. . . . Thanks so much for reading, I just added the next chapter!
Wow. One-shots don't normally get 10s from me- I have to see other chapters before I warm up to a story but this is great! I swear I almost cried, awwwww!
Oh my, you scared me at the beginning of the story- Draco and Ron? *shudder* I even went back to the top of the story to look for a SSP warning... but I couldn't stop laughing. Crabbe and Goyle are so stupid, poor Draco! There were a few misused comma, but besides that this story was perfect! 9/10
Author's Response: Thank you so much! Yeah, I'm glad you enjoyed it! Maybe I should put in an SSP warning though...
Very nice start to this fic, though I do have a few things to point out. In this sentence, “Finally my haven for a week," I would recommend adding a comma after "finally." Also, when a character speaks it can be in the same paragraph as who is speaking. Such as: "Hello," she said. So Hermione is still living with her parents in this fic. Do they know about the Wizarding War? If they do they probably wouldn't give into her weekend away without lots of persuasion. A nice start to your story! ~Paprika
This story is simply amazing. I'm rather inclined to hate Peter Pettigrew, and the fact that your story made me feel sympathetic towards him is simply phoenominal. Peter is so downtrodden, he truly regrets what he did, and to think he did it because of power. His obsession with power creates a bit of empathy in almost all of us, and I related to him very much.
Showing that Peter possibly didn't want to turn in Lily and James, and didn't want to give Voldemort everything was a new thought to me, being as biased as I am. "The Darkest One," is a great title for Pettigrew to think of Voldemort by, I got a slight shiver every time I read it.
In so many cases you showed Peter's internal battles. "Take it," "he'll want it," and "you'll take it." Peter was completely helpless because of his love for power, and when he grabbed the paring knife I really did wonder how far he would go to defeat power's call. But then power called to him again and he was helpless once more. Once again, I loved this story, and can't seem to find a critical comment to make.
Author's Response: Aw, thank you, Paprika.
I'm feeling quite glowy from the nice review you've left. I'm glad you liked this. I was quite proud of it and I'm glad to see it getting more attention.
First off, I would like to say that I have found your story to be very intriguing and I can't wait for the next chapter. While reading through the story; however, I spotted a few minor errors.
Quote- "son who’s cheeks" just a small nit-picky correction- "who's" would be "whose" in this case.
Also, a britpick for you- favorite would be spelled favourite.
It would probably be a good thing if you showed how, if and when Draco changed, he was very out of character from the little we saw of him.
But I liked this story. You have a nice writing style, and this is a twist on Draco/Hermione that I have never seen before. I applaud your originality. Hermione was very in character, and I'm sure that you will do a good job with Draco if you explain the change in him. I look forward to reading new chapters from you!
~Paprika
Author's Response: Thanks, Paprika for reading my story and for the helpful hints. in my next chapters, draco's change will be explained a little more, so just wait.... i'm glad you enjoyed my story, and i appreciate the nit-picky corrections, they'll make me more aware of HOW i'm writing instead of WHAT i'm writing.
-Gryffindorgrl
Oh my gosh! I found you here too! Hun- it's Paprika30! I was scrolling and I saw your penname... I was like oh my god! And I haven't read this story on the other site, so I'll give you a review for each chapter here! I actually didn't find much of anything to pick on, and you know how much I do that. The plot seems to be pretty tight so far, but then, it's only the first chapter. I can give you something constructive soon! Everything was very clear and you left nothing in gray areas. I'm lovin' this story so far, and I can't wait to read the next chapter... I could trot over to the other site but that would take the fun out of waiting! And a side note- for Of Ferrets and Weasels when you said that someone said that chapter 11 was too long- obviously they don't pay attention. The previous chapter was your longest yet... they probably were just flaming for the fun of it... don't take it personally. Back to this story- your writing has drawn me in, and though I'm not a big fan of present tense, I love this story! (No mean feat) Cheers! ~Paprika