MuggleNet Fan Fiction :: Lalalalatina

Lalalalatina [Contact]
03/15/07

I'm never really here but I appreciate reviews, they make life a little brighter. I try to pop in from time to time, but I'm terribly sorry that I'm neglecting MNFF.

A shout out to any people still reading my wimsy little pieces. =D

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Stories by Lalalalatina [22]

Reviews by Lalalalatina [134]

Favorite Authors [4]

Favorite Stories [26]

Lalalalatina's Favorites [30]

Reviews by Lalalalatina

Narcissa by StellaSirius

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Narcissa isn't really all gung-ho about killing muggles- she'd rather watch others do it. And yet, she has to follow her master's orders. A poem about Mrs. Malfoy.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 08/06/07 Title: Chapter 1: Narcissa

Great poem, that last line was brilliant. One of my other favorite lines was
Once upon a time there was a puppet on a string. I think that it was an excellent start to the poem and clearly showed the angle at which you were going to describe Narcissa's character for the rest of the poem. My one bit of critique are that last two lines of the first stanza. They seem a bit short compared to the rest of the poem. Anyways, excellent job. =) Keep writing!

Author's Response: Yeah- this poem was more about the lines and meaning and stuff, and it was one of those that just kinda flowewd onto the computer? I didn\'t really check it for meter and accents and length and stuff. Thanks for reviewing- I love your stuff!

All my faults by fawkeshermione221

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: A poem from Dumbledore's POV. Contains DH spoilers.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 08/06/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Very sad poem. You did a great job of describing his faults and of how he probably feels about them. The last two lines were brilliant. My bits of critique:

Peacefulness,
Happiness,
A family again,
These are the things I wish for you
when I whisper your name.

While most of the poem rhymes, this stanze does not, and it kind of wrecks the flow.

The memory of myself, so unspeakably vain...

This lne is a bit long and I think it could be separated into two.

Anyways, great job. Keep writing! ^_^

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! I\'m especially grateful for your critique. It helps make me a better writer. Actually, for that stanze I meant for again to be pronounced like \"a gain\". (I know it doesn\'t totally rhyme with name but ti sounds a bit better that way). As for the other line, I\'m glad you pointed that out to me. I might have to go change that now. Thanks! fawkeshermione

In Loving Memory by PadfootBaby

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: What I hope is an appropriate send-off for the loved ones we lost in Deathly Hallows. Hope you like it.
Nominated for the 2007 Quicksilver Quills!

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 08/06/07 Title: Chapter 1: In Loving Memory

That was brilliant. It was great the way you described ever lost character. My only bit of critique:

Pink-haired she loved him,

That line is a bit confusing. I think that the "pink-haired" is not a necessary part of that line, or if you want it to be in there perhaps you should include a comma or reword the line.

Anyways, fantastic poem. ^_^ Keep writing!

Author's Response: Yes, I had a bit of trouble with that line, but my reasoning eventually was that when she was depressed about his rejection, her hair went brown. But when she was happy, and by his side, her hair changed back to pink. Odd, yeah, but I had poet\'s block (if it exists lol) on that line. Glad you liked the rest, though! Thanks for the review and critique!!!

Dear Sev by Will_the_Ranger

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Lily writes Sev a letter after the fifth year incident.

“We can’t stay this way,
So I’ll leave you in my wake.
Because I shouldn’t have to pay,
For the choices that you make.”

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 08/29/07 Title: Chapter 1: Dear Sev

Very well done, you expressed her thoughts creatively such as in this line...
I’m writing us away,
The us that never was.
Your use of words made this poem so much more "poetic" and original. Great job.

Author's Response: Thank you very much. I actually wrote the poem for a different reason, but it fit this topic so well I just tweaked a few words and sent it in...

Falling by Wicked_Quill

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: A short poem told from Ginny's POV during her third or fourth year. It is regarding her unreciprocated feelings for Harry. In my imagining this is what she's feeling around the time she "gives up" on him.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 10/13/07 Title: Chapter 1: Falling

Wow, this was quite powerful and very unique.
And no matter how much I want him to
he will never be waiting to catch me at the bottom.
And I will spend a lifetime
falling and breaking over, and over, and over.
I hate to think that Ginny was this unhappy, but I still think you did an excellent job of describing the pain of a lonely heart.

Great job!

Author's Response: Thank you thank you thank you! Reveiws make my day. I think that Ginny is unhappy but more than that I think she is trying really hard to convince herself not to love him. Thanks again for the reveiw!

A Pocket Full of Posies by Will_the_Ranger

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Ever wonder what Ginny thought when she saw Harry dead in Hagrids arms? Read and you will know.

R&R

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 10/13/07 Title: Chapter 1: A Pocket Full of Posies

so sad...
I like how you incorporated the actual lyrics of the song in the poem. great work, keep writing!

Author's Response: thanks!

A Magical Christmas Surprise by Ollirep

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Harry gets a magical Christmas surprise.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 10/17/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

one word:

brilliant

The Twinge by MagEd

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Some say to follow your heart, others think it best to follow your head. And what does Ginny Weasley believe? A short history of Ginny Weasley and how she learned to follow the twinge, from her first kiss to the day when Harry almost died. *one-shot*

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 02/09/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

I cannot believe you wrote this in two hours... it's amazing. You do a great job of describing the emotions of the characters. The scene in which Harry played dead is probably one of my favorites in DH, and I greatly enjoyed reading it from a different point of view. Amazing job as always-- you are a very talented writer!

Author's Response: It\'s one of my favorite scenes as well; probably one of the ones I\'ve read the most. Thanks very much for the review; I\'m glad you liked the story!

Prisoner of Life by HermyRox12

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: A poem from the point of view of an Azkaban prisoner.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 12/01/07 Title: Chapter 1: Prisoner of Life

sad. =[

But great- I like the shortness of the poem; you were able to send out the message in so little words. The last two lines are my favorite. :)

Keep writing!

Author's Response: Thanks! I was challenging myself to write a quality poem, with as little words as possible, and I think I did a good job. Thanks for the review. ~HermyRox12

As Happily Ever After As They're Gonna Get by cjbaggins

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: My take on the first of those 'nineteen years' between the 36th chapter of DH and the epilogue.

Warnings: contains an unusually-shaped ring, a nosy neighbour, a rude shop assistant, shaving mishaps, thoughtful gestures, threatening goblins, and, unexplained appearances of Romantic!Ron and Romantic!Harry. You have been warned.

Rating is for *mild* innuendo and *mostly* innocent interactions but I wouldn't let my 9 year old read it.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 03/29/08 Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5 - Popping the (First) Question

Yey! This is the type of story I've been looking for-- one that fills in that space between the last chapter and the epilougue. I'm enjoying the story. ^^ Please update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to review. I\'m pleased you are enjoying the story! cj

Flaw by harrypotterfangirl21

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Perfection isn't always what we see in the mirror.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 02/09/08 Title: Chapter 1: Flaw

Hi professor Katie!

I really like this piece, mostly because the ending left me thinking. The last stanza is very symbolic of Hermione''s angst, [that is what you said you were aiming for right?] I also really like the title, it got me interested. :]

Author's Response: Thanks! Yes, I was really trying to get some Hermione angst in there; glad that came out in the end. :)

Thanks again for the review!

Into the Fire by clumsywerewolf2438

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: McGonagall sits in Dumbledore's empty office hours after his death and wonders what will become of the Order and everyone else who fights against Voldemort.

Oddly enough, this story was inspired by the following quote:

Were a star quenched on high,
For ages would its light,
Still travelling downward from the sky,
Shine on our mortal sight.
So when a great man dies,
For years beyond our ken,
The light he leaves behind him lies
Upon the paths of men.
-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 01/11/08 Title: Chapter 1: Into the Fire

Great poem, Dumbledore's death was very sad, as was the poem. A stanza that I especially liked was:
Even the very bravest amongst us–
Those who are noble, kind and wise–
Have pushed aside the ones they love, thus,
In pushing them down, letting evil rise.
[I really liked those last two lines!]

The only suggestion I can give is to divide up or reduce the size of some of your longer lines. I know how that can be hard sometimes, especially with poems that rhyme, but it will overall help the flow and appearance of the poem.

Great job and keep writing!

Author's Response: Thanks! I love that part too!

Fighting Otter by voldiegirl

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Hermione is being tortured into speaking in the Malfoy Manor during Deathly Hallows. Hermione's pep talk to herself not to give away her best friend's secrets.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 01/11/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

That was an interesting event in the book to choose to write a poem of. I think you captured Hermione's bravery well. Great job.

Author's Response: Thanks! I try to find moving events to write about. I really honor Hermione\'s bravery, and think that chapter was a life-changing chapter for her!

Loony by liquid_silver

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Relatively short poem about Luna.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 01/22/08 Title: Chapter 1: Loony

Excellent poem, I loved the repeating stanza. It really emphasized the main point of the poem. Great job. :]

Author's Response: Glad you enjoyed it!

Unexpected Love by Cwiddy

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Love sees Remus and Tonks into a new year.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 01/22/08 Title: Chapter 1: Unexpected Love

Very sweet poem-- congradulations [hope my spelling's alright] on winning the challenge.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I enjoyed writing this!

The Marauders by Lyra Lestrange

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Remus, Peter, Sirius, and James were best friends, but this didn't last forever. The story of the Marauder's summed up in a poem...

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 01/22/08 Title: Chapter 1: The Marauders

Great summary and rhyming :]

Author's Response: Thank you!

Swaying Free by Gin_PotterGirl

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: The sea is still,
And swaying free.
Its clear blue waves are
Mocking me.

Harry and Ginny were always meant to be together. Although, one person usually dies before the other. They told Harry he wasn't going to die. If only they were right...

For my triplet, Vicki/harry_victoria, because she let me base this off her story, Forever Young.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 03/24/08 Title: Chapter 1: Swaying Free

aww.. so sad! I loved your choice of words, they really reach the heart. Great piece!

Author's Response: Aww, thanks!\r\n\r\nxoxo Michelle :)

A Letter to Remember by ink_daughter

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: A cute poem about an eleven-year-old expecting her Hogwarts letter.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 04/18/08 Title: Chapter 1: The Very First Letter

Cute poem. ^^

Author's Response: Thanks!

Flicker by HorcruxHunter14

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Severus knows that the temptations he gives in to will change his life forever. Afraid of losing everything important to him, he asks that some things will never fade from his life. Severus/Lily.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 04/18/08 Title: Chapter 1: Flicker

This was a very interesting piece. The flaming red hair kept bringing to mind Lily. Is that whom you were referring to?

Anyways, I liked the structure and repetition of this poem. Great job!

Author's Response: Yes, it\'s a Snape/Lily poem :). Thanks for the review!

Of Blood, Gore, and Alibis by lullaby BANG

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
Summary: It’s coming, believe it or not. The Ministry doesn’t believe it, but who will then? It’s infuriating to know you’re invisible to society, but then there’s something exhilarating, entrancing about it. It’s dancing the devilish dance: provocative, teasing- leaving the viewers wanting more, or better yet, it’s like having an addiction.

An addiction with a purpose to be more precise… oh, and the occasional bite. Who are we then? We’re the out casted of the outcasts within a secluded society that further alienates us and leaves us utterly alone, but we’ve finally found each other so we’re not as alone. Things can change in an instance, though, and they already have. I have to confess: I’m scared, but I’ve already started to dance so I must keep dancing.

And besides, I don’t want the vampire or werewolf communities seizing control of the Ministry because I’ve already seen what they’ve done.

Reviewer: Lalalalatina Signed
Date: 07/24/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter One: I'm All Dressed Up and Ready to Play

I think this is an excellend beginning to your story. It's a great introduction for the characters and who they are, or appear to be to others.

I think my favorite part of this was ther very last line. Poor Dacia, her loneliness is heartbreaking. Excellent work. ^_^

PS. Thank you for the fantastic banner!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it, and yes poor Dacia. And you're welcome. (:

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