This should be interesting...
Author's Response: I hope so! :-)
That was great!!! I think i might like thisstory even more than the first, and that's saying something!!! Well, onto this chapter: MAEVE IS RIGHT ABOUT HIM!!!!! and also, why is narcissa so upset???? Did something happen to draco?????
Author's Response: Thanks for the review, Mikaela! I hope Maeve is right about him... we'll have to wait and see. *evil grin* And you'll find out just why Narcissa is so upset soon!
Cant wait to see how you're gonna tie in the stuff from Halfblood prince with this story. Youve already got so much going on that I cant wait for the next chapter. Narcissa is sooo perfect and I loved Roderick's comment about them being a double act!! Funny and sad at the same time. 10 out of 10!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I'm not sure myself how I'm going to tie everything in yet! LOL
An incredible chapter, you portrayed Narcissa's vulnerablility very well and the animosity between her and Maeve was chilling. It was nice to see Lugh again, eveytime he shows up we learn something new and interesting and this time he was just the same as always. Harry's reaction to Maeve and the way he talked about Snape was really true to the character, if i were Snape i'd be very worried right now! I can't wait to see what happens next!
Author's Response: Well you'll see how Snape feels about Harry soon! Let's just say he's not top of his list of worries at the moment! LOL. Maeve and Narcissa are giving me a lot of pleasure. I can vent all my bitchy tendencies through them... it's very therapeutic! And I am glad you think Harry was in character... I still find him difficult to write sometimes. Thank you for all your lovely reviews, I love reading them. :-)
THE SEQUEL! AT LAST! And I really hope you explain Snape's innocence in this whole thing pretty well, because when I read the end of the 6th book, I absolutely hated him. Now, of course, I'm starting to wonder if he really did kill Dumbledore on Dumbledore's orders, and I wasn't wrong to trust them both after all, but I still won't be happy until the whole thing is explained, including WHY Dumbledore had to die.
Author's Response: Well, I can't promise what Jo's going to deliver in the seventh book... but I will try and give you a compelling reason for Snape's innocence. :-)
Wow - thank you so much for this - I am back in my customary enthralled state. I too am intrigued by Narcissa and Snape's past relationship - her use of the words 'my son' , her flaunting of the perfume/potion at Snape's house and most importantly her faith in the man. Is this role for her something you always had planned for the sequel or is it borne of HBP? I am intrigued. I am glad to see Madam Bones as I was bitterly disapointed that she was killed off in HBP. Continue to be entranced by Roderick (of course) and the line Taking care not to disturb the flow of their conversation he produced some glasses and a bottle of wine with his wand and prepared himself for a pleasurable few hours. conjured up such a wonderful image for me as did his suggestion that the two women form a variaety act. The other character that I am revelling in is Rumus - your protrayal just makes me love him all the more. Also glad to see Lugh and I am wondering if he will take a greater role in this story with Dumbledore gone. Very well done and thank you again for this story.
Author's Response: Narcissa was always a character that intrigued me and I only had the opportunity to write her twice in HDPL. But one of those scenes involved Severus, and I always had the feeling that as far as those two were concerned, still waters ran deep. So we shall see where they go. I have plotlines in my head and I'm wavering over which way to go. Roderick is a darling... I love him to pieces. he's the perfect foil for any situation. Thank you for the reviews... it's so good to know people liked HPDL enough that they have come back for more. :-)
That was a wonderful start. Your descriptions, as always were breathtaking and you managed to set the scene so succinctly and then move the plot along so effortlessly. Interesting how you have managed to incorporate elements of HBP and have woven these in with your own version. I loved the way the Maeve carried the 'Severus is innocent' debate. (She must have been reading the forums!)LOL! Sorry - don't mean to be flippant as I really enjoyed this start. Lovely to have Roderick back as well as rakish and roguish as I love to see him. Also, before I go, one of the most touching parts was the insight into Rumus' thoughts as he was unable to stop himself wondering if the change in circumstances would give him a chance. How true and perceptive this part seemed. Well done!
Author's Response: Hee hee... Maeve hasn't been reading the forums, but I have! LOL I keep trying to make Remus give up on her, I even gave him Felicia in Daughter of Light... but he's a typical man... doesn't know what's good for him. *rollseyes*
May I start with saying what an excellent timing! You uploaded it, and then it was mod:ed and accepted just in time for me to print it and bring it along on a 5-hour car journey. It was about the one think that made the trip bearable. :)
Then I must begin with Narcissa. I read the excerpt already in the forums, so I was expecting something good. And I got even more than I had imagined, I think you understand Mrs Malfoy well, you write her as admirably as all other characters, JKR’s or your own. In addition I love to see hints of your own theories on her, how you interpret her relation to her husband and Severus. And I must say that I wonder about her hesitation in the sentence “He has been a good father to… to my son.”
The whole interaction between “these two very attractive, distraught women” was fantastic, we got to see yet another side of Maeve at the same time as you introduced Narcissa in a very satisfying way. One of the little details, when Maeve felt a little ashamed over maybe trusting Severus less than Narcissa does, it’s things like that which make Maeve real and a character to relate to.I was very surprised to see Lugh Lamfada so soon, I hadn’t expected him yet. And also it felt a little upside-down to see him move around like a normal (or at least close to) person. I know we’ve seen him around people before, but in Snape’s house and in the Ministry… I liked to see him deflate Roderick a bit though, nice to see that there’s someone able to do so. It sort of gives us the idea that Lugh is in a way more powerful than Voldemort, who maybe wasn’t exactly tricked by Rampton, but sure effected by his charms. Clever ways in which you tied back to Roderick’s animagus form; …of something that could easily see through whatever web he was weaving., and “I’ll spin them a line –”. That also goes for him calling Pettigrew ‘rodent’.
“No.” It was a small word for such a monumental decision. - such a strong line.
In the yard, I wasn’t really happy to see that “sullen rat”, it’s impossible to know if you put it there as a part of setting, or if a certain Death Eater decided to linger a little.
Concerning Maeve’s “new way to fly”, I must get back to the Chronicles of Cheysuli I’ve mentioned before. They’ve sort of got an animagi gift, where each warrior is connected to an animal, of which they can take on the shape. And when this shape-changing occur, the way the author has described it’s very much like Maeve’s experience of becoming the atoms. I like the idea of the gift, it’s convenient to say the least and I suspect you didn’t introduce it simply to transport Maeve to London. I’m also interested if Harry has got this ability, seeing as Lugh is also a ‘relative’ of his.Nice with a little AU, in the way that I got to see Amelia Bones alive. I liked the bit: “Amelia leant forward on the walnut desk; eager for answers she could believe.” – to me it showed again her qualities as Minister of Magic, wanting the truth but not about to believe anything.
I can see why Maeve hesitated about going to Grimmauld Place, but I’m glad she decided to go. After Narcissa, I had been waiting for two more meetings for Maeve, one was Harry. I’m still waiting for their actual talk, and to see Harry again after a few more days. He is staying true to the Harry from DoL, but having fallen head over heel for the HBP Harry, I hope ‘yours’ is going to come to resemble him more as the story goes on.
“Oh, I wasn’t thinking of going back to Hogwarts at all,” she said, her insides going cold at the very thought of entering Dumbledore’s school. - This just reminded me so much of Harry in HBP. I’ll be interested to see whether any of them will return to the school in this sequel, or whether they’ll be busy chasing husbands, enemies and pieces of severed souls.
“Green gashes appraised her, ripping at her to get to the secrets she may have held.” - another one of those lines, reading it is like taking the first sip of a perfectly brewed cup of tea, simply enjoyable.One think I picked up on, when Roderick spoke of Pettigrew, he said “ I can’t believe that stupid rodent sometimes,”, which was closely followed by “How stupid can a wizard get?” - the repetition of ‘stupid’ was not a grave one, but I’m sure it would be only too easy for you to come up with another word there.
So, I mentioned one meeting. The other is of course between Maeve and Severus, I can barely wait for it. As much as I want Maeve to throw her arms around him and for everything to be all right, I know how I will enjoy anything you are going to write. I just hope there won't be too many long before it happens in the story.
This chapter was quality through and through, like yours always are, and there is no way one could stop admiring you as a writer, Maeve.
Author's Response: “He has been a good father to… to my son.” And what are you wondering about that? *Grins* That was one of those lines that the characters say... that really didn't come from me... and it really got me wondering myself!
I love Narcissa... she's my favourite new character to write! They are a match made in hell, her and Maeve, and I'm looking forward to writing them more and more.
And you know what I did...I read your review and went along to Amazon and ordered the first of the Cheysuli Chronicles because I had to read it! The way Maeve travels comes from the legends of the Danaan. When they realised their time was over they became one with their surroundings and disappeared into the earth... this is just an extension of that ability.
I was deeply disappointed by the death of Amelia. I thought it would have been interesting to see her as minister.... but she would have been fair and understanding...and I think Scrimgeour served the plot of HBP better. We'll see where she goes in this fic. Maeve is talking to Harry as we speak so it shouldn't be long before you get to see that meeting... Severus will have to wait a bit longer though. And I don't think Maeve quite knows what she's going to do when she meets him again!
Thank you so much for a super-long review....I relished every word of it....and I'll sort that repetition out. No matter how many times I read something little oddities still creep through the net!
I thought Narcissa was portrayed extremely well. So Maeve is going to be at Grimmauld Place? I imagine some ordeals, or at least some uncomfortable conversations. This was a very intriguing chapter. As always, I look forward to more.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Grimmauld Place is definately not going to be the welcoming place it once was.
Poor Harry! Poor Maeve! She is truly a strong woman to be bearing up to such terrible scrutiny, though I can understand that her faith would waver when faced with Narcissa's cold sneer. And Roderick! How despicable! I can only imagine the blunders he was ready to create in order to make events turned out best for him. Though, perhaps I underestimate dear Roderick. Never the less, anyone who could watch such a scene as that in Spinner's End in amusement is a low brute, indeed. Also, I loved the line- something about he knew Lugh could see through the web he was weaving, considering he turns into a scarlet spider. Oh, and the form of travel is wonderful and so inventive! I often wonder where you get your ideas, but I suppose part of the mystery would be deluded should that happen. Still, I love this chapter and I salute you for evoking from me both sympathy and anger toward Narcissa. Very, very few can do so. Thank-you for another wonderful installment of your story and I look forward to the next. Brilliant as always ~Katie
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I think this story is going to a bit darker than Daughter of Light and Harry and Maeve will be facing some real demons. Roderick was a bad man, wasn't he...showing his true colours. I'm falling in love with Narcissa's character and I'm really looking forward to getting to know her better through this story. Always good to get a review from you... they make my day. :-)
Wow, thanks for being so quick to update. and what an update it was. Nice work integrating the HBP stuff, that workes well and it will be fun to see where you take it. Narcissa, now there's interesting. Wonder what you'll do with her?? Good to see Rampton back and on top form. Bring on the updates!!
Author's Response: I rather think Narcissa's going to be taking me! LOL Thanks for the review.
Hooray! The sequel to HPDL has arrived! I must say that so far you are doing an excellent job! I thought that the way you blended HBP into your already existing plotline was smooth and well-planned. Though I will be interested to hear whether or not Snape’s father was a muggle or not, as he is in canon. And if he uses his nickname, Half Blood Prince. Maeve’s reluctance to believe that Snape had killed Dumbledore was done wonderfully. And you’ve touched upon a point I’ve been wondering about myself, did Dumbledore want Snape to kill him? The grammar was excellent for the most part, I did notice one troubling sentence: “this is were Severus will come back to.” I believe it should be “where”. “Come back to” sounds a bit odd to me, perhaps it would have been better to say “return to”? Overall it was amazing, I am anxious for an update and to hear Snape’s side of the story as well as what he plans to do with Draco and Narcissa. Perhaps help them retreat into hiding as Dumbledore had promised?
Author's Response: I'm having to cherry-pick what I want from HBP, so some things will be here and some things won't be. I'm probably not going to use the book..because it won't achieve much. I'm currently working through chapter three and working out how to condense Harry's knowledge of the Horcruxes and Voldemort into three weeks of the summer holidays! I'll go and take a look at that troublesome sentence now... and I've just submitted chpater two so you won't have to wait long for the update! Thanks for reviewing, Marie. :-)
So excited to see my fave author back!!! I really love what you have planned with narcissa because i think she would be great in this fic.I so want to see what she and maeve are going to do when they meet again. Was it the bookstore they were in when they argued?? loved remus in this. He was stuck between the order and maeve I thought. Looking forward to the next chapter!!
Author's Response: Glad to see another reader back too! I'm feeling ever sorrier for Remus... his life is so complicated, bless him! Thanks for the review.
Where to begin? WOW! let me say it again, WOW! That was just incredible, you've started with a real bang, none of this dily dalying that some people do, nope you just dive head first in to the story. I LOVE IT! The way that you've incorporated HBP is great and that was one hell of a cliffhanger. As always your description was amazing, you detail everything so vividly. Personally i think that on a scale of 1 to 10 this is about a twenty. Sheer brilliance!
Author's Response: Thanks, Nat.Pat! I didn't have much choice but to start with a bang after HBP! I have a half-written interlude that was the plan for summer but HBP changed all of that. It might see the light of day but I have to crack on with this story now that the plot has bitten me! And get used to the cliffhangers! I like them. *evil grin*
This is very good! I wondered after reading HBP what it would do to your storyline, but I love how you have incorporated it! I really think that Maeve is right...I even thought that after reading HBP. I really to think that Snape and Dumbledor had an understanding going on, and if Snape was presented with having to kill Dumbledor, he had ordered Snape to do so. I hope that is right anyway hehe...Anyway love the way this story is heading and can't wait for the next chapter. I followed Daughter all the way from Chapter One and loved every minute of it :)
Author's Response: Thanks for the review, Potterfan524! Glad to see you back for more with the sequel. :-) I just hope I can live up to expectations! LOL For me to write this story I have to believe there was more to Snape and Dumbledore than was seen on the face of it. And Maeve certainly has to believe it or she will be in serious trouble with her marriage!
Yay!!! *doing happy dance*. I'm so glad to have another one of your stories to read. I'm glad to see Roderick back (in human form). He definately makes things interesting. I can't wait to see what happens between Narcissa & Maeve. I'll be looking for the next chapter. Thanks!!!
Author's Response: I'm so pleased everyone seems to like Narcissa being in this story! It makes my life easier as far as plot is concerned and what I have planned. Glad to see you reading the sequel, Jenn...hope you stick with it... it's likely to be another long haul! LOL
Very impressed by how quickly you've got this up considering how much plot tweaking must have happened after hbp. Very insightful- oh how i wish maeve is right. Brilliant chapter as I have come to expect from you. Fantastic description and insight into characters. Roderick is still a mystery- what a stirrer. And i will be very interested about what you feel there is/has been between snape and narcissa. I felt there had to be a reason for snape to make the vow, when it seems such an out of character thing for him to do, tying himself down. Can't wait for more!
Author's Response: Thanks, ellidiot! I was struck by major inspiration when I'd read HBP and really fell into that chapter. I hope you like my explanation for Snape/Narcissa, which will come later! I did do some tweaking and it certainly wasn't the opening chapter that I had anticipated...but it worked and I'm looking forward to fitting my original story around this one.
Oh, no, I just left a long review and it didn't work. I loved this first chapter. Your descriptions are absolutely superb and draw me irrevocably into the story. One description that I particularly enjoyed: "the brown wreckage of her eyes." Absolutely exquisite, makes me shiver. There are lots of little phrases like that that I want to read over and over, soak their [adjectives fail me] up. I look forward to reading your next chapter. I'm practically hanging off my seat in anticipation!
Author's Response: Thank you for the review, Moonbright! Next chapter is halfway done so you will get it this week. I'm glad you like those little turns of phrase, they give me a lot of pleasure as an author when they work as well as that one did. Keep reading! :-)
Oo-oooh, this is excellent!
Before I read HBP, and before I knew it would be so significant for your sequel, I sort of imagined a happy life between Maeve and Severus. Not calm or peaceful, since the war would still be going on, but happy anyway, with Severus coming over to the light side even more, fighting alongside Maeve towards what’s right.
Now, that wouldn’t have been dull, because everything else would have given the action, plus that I’m sure you would’ve had some wonderful wife/husband dynamics there anyway. But now! I admire you even more from the very beginning – lots of fanfiction authors in your position would probably have given up, but to you it seems to have been an opportunity. Aside with the dull life of marriage and happiness, off to the darker, adventurous times with no certainty. It was maybe not in the exact same way, but both you and JKR have put much more importance to Severus – I hope it pleases you.
Maeve was wonderful in this chapter, what else could I say about her? I must admit that when I first read the rather horrible happening in HBP, your Severus was gone from my mind and the first reaction was very much ‘DIE SNAPE, DIE!’. But after I calmed down a bit and started thinking rationally, my train of thoughts were surprisingly like the ones Maeve is sharing with Remus. Especially this bit: Severus has to kill someone he loved; the hate Harry saw was for himself, Roderick. - I thought just that of the ‘hatred and revulsion’ in his eyes – why would Dumbledore make Snape feel revulsion, if not for the reason we think?So, Remus is back as well. Oh, brilliant that he still haven’t completely let go of his Maeve feelings, and excellent how he feels about himself for it. I haven’t gone back to read all of DoL yet (even though it’s tempting since you challenged us to find the changing), but I’ll be interested to see if Felicia returns… even if it’s not crucial to the plot.
Roderick, of course. I thought at first that it was all very lucky for you to have him in this position after HBP, then I thought you had maybe put him in that exact situation until after HBP, as a useful resource for your story. That wouldn’t surprise me at all.
I hated him for the way he spoke of Dumbledore, but at the same time I loved your skill of writing him – he hasn’t changed a bit, has he? I also liked him referring to Narcissa as a ‘blabbermouth’.Narcissa. *pleasant anticipation* I’m so looking forward to the next chapter. I mean, after what I’ve understand you’re going to be semi-canon with Severed Souls, that would mean there’s indeed something big between Narcissa Malfoy and Severus Snape, that he has been hiding from his wife. Very exciting!
Now, I don’t often get a chance to pick up mistakes from your stories, simply because there usually aren’t any. But this time I noticed: “He drew his wand and whispered “Alohamora” at the gloomy entrance. - Unless the spell is slightly altered, it’s ‘AlohOmora’.
Thanks, Maeve, for being the amazing writer that you are, and for giving us the sequel so darn quickly! ;)
Author's Response: Hee hee...damned Alohomora! I'm always getting that wrong. :-)
I'm still plotting this out because of the necessary changes that HBP has caused so even I'm not sure what little twists and turns it may take. But I do know one thing...Narcissa will play a large part and there is something huge between her and Snape that we will discover later in the fic. I want her to be slighlty more than Jo has her at the moment and I want Maeve to have a female character that will challenge her in some way...so more Narcissa on the way.
I had contemplated letting Roderick go, that was the original plan. But as he grew towards the end of Daughter of Light I knew I couldn't kill him and I also knew that he would be a great character to have no matter what happened in HBP...and there he was, right in the first chapter, popping up when he was needed. We will see more Roderick, as well as a lot more Neville and possibly less of Ron and Hermione. Harry.. well Harry is going to have lots of problems now! And Remus better hold on tight because it's going to be a bumpy ride for him where his friendship with Maeve is concerned.
So pleased to have you back reading... your reviews always make me happy!
Go bhfoire dia orainn!! Oh my God.....that was really fast and REALLY good. I was actually wondering what your opinion would be when Severus killed Dumbledore in HBP (I think Dumbledore was pleading to die too....nice to know someone else agrees) Well what to say. I really liked the idea that you are including HBP spoilers but what about the Potions book? And Snape really being a half blood? The fact that his mother was Eileen Prince...?What about the Horcruxes?(Though I think the new title gives that answer away) Enough with the questions(which hopefully will be answered soon-I'm extremely impatient which is quite strange considering how patiently, most of the time, I wait for HP). Anyway, I really liked the way that you've let me (sorry made me) ask myself theses questions which means that this was a great start because now I'm rehooked! And Roderick's back! And a new angle with regards to Severus' past life(or present life)as a death eater. And Narcissa Malfoy..... A great new fic!! P.S. Give us a hint as to what you changed...please?
Author's Response: Sorry to be so long replying but I've been on holiday and only got back late friday! I'm glad I re-hooked you! LOL On my first read of HBP I was devastated and for a while (an hour) considered not writing any more FanFic because I couldn't see a way round Snape being guilty. And then of course I realised that I had just been handed a whole ream of great new material that meant I would get my original story written but add lots more new intrigue at the same time. There will be some things from HBP and some things will be left out... the Potions book, for instance. I have no room... or timescale.. to write that in. But other things will come into play...not least Severus and the Dumbledore issue. Thanks for the review! Chapter two is on its way soon. :-)