i love reading your creattion i read the last chapter and freaked and now its all like omg keep wrighting
Author's Response: Thank you so very much, though this response is much too late... O.o
I sort of had a hunch that Daisy was behind all the murders, but I don't know if she's fully responsible. I don't know if that makes sense, but I just feel like she's under a spell or doing this for someone else or something like that. And poor Parvati! I didn't want her to die! :( Anyway, great chapter! Can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: Mhm... I like your theory :) Daisy under a spell... just read every line carefully, hon, :D. Thanks for your review!
ooooh, the drama. :) So, now we need to know...what is the REASON behind all of this *SIGH*.....and Harry is so not the person to mess with. His wife was one of the murder victims, so you know that he will get to the bottom of this!!!! I can't wait for the next chapter!!!!!!
Author's Response: Oh... right-o, Harry isn't the one to mess with. :D And Daisy is a total... erm... idiot, I'd say. Hehe. And Harry does have to do it this time, doesn't he? :) Next chapter in the queue!
UUGGGGHHHH. PAVARRRTTTTIII!! NOOOO! and yet, i'm slightly happy... god i'm a sick one. plez keep updating, i kno how hard being in college must be but plez, find a time wen u can update for those of us who only have high school to contend with..
OMFG!!!! What a cliffhanger!! ARGHH, I mean, the foreshadowing about how Parvati was going to be attacked/killed was pro, but still.... what a shock! who is it???!!! This is such a great story :)
Author's Response: LOL. Well... Thanks! But the killer? :D You'll know. Thanks for your review!
*is stunned into stunned silence*
You have NOT just done that. NOOOO way.
Seriously. No way.
*is still speechless*
Author's Response: I'm sorry about that... thanks for the review. :)
Oh my word!!!!! Okay, so is Daisy really the killer or is it Irene? I got a little confused with all the scene changes! And is Parvati really dead? I don't want her to be because I really have grown to like her and Harry together. I have so many questions now! Hope you can update soon!
Author's Response: Haha. That's for you to find out later, hon. I can't tell you who the killer is, can I? :D And yeah, sadly, Parvati is dead. No loopholes. :( Thanks for reviewing! I'll update as soon as I can. :)
oh my gosh oh my gosh omgomgomg ok that is suspence
in like a bottle your an amazing auther and i invey you for it as you can see i cant spell please up date soon
2nd review yay! Anyways, very nice chapter! I wonder who the mystery person was...
Keep it up and I hope you update very fast.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'll try to update... please pray that my college will give us a two-day holiday! They didn't even give us a week off for swine flu. :(
Author's Response: Thank you! I'll try to update... please pray that my college will give us a two-day holiday! They didn't even give us a week off for swine flu. :(
Oh My Goodness...I know this is under a Harry/Ginny fic, but I never wanted Parvati to get hurt...and you made me believe that they really loved each other *sigh* *wipes a tear away*.....anxious for another update....
Author's Response: Hey... :( Believe me, but I wasn't too happy killing off Parvati, either. Two years ago, while I wrote a particular scene in this chapter, I was just so sad. I'm used to the fact that she's dead in the fic now, though. :D Update... well, I'll try, hon. With college, it's tough to catch up with the internet. We'll see. :)
Sorry, I should have reviewed earlier, but I wanted to read the whole fic and was far too impatient to stop!
This is awesome, love it! It's great to have the romance (Ron and Hermione's story is sad, but awesome) and the mystery (murders! Woohoo!) side by side. I almost squealed out loud at the car crash, I was like "Nooooo!" :)
More soon pleasums!
Author's Response: Sure! Sure! I'm updating just now! Thanks for your lovely review!!! :)
Oh no! Someone must have been using Polyjuice potion to turn themselves into Ginny! Oooh! This story is getting better and better! I did like it that Chris and Daisy got back together. That was sweet. But, I still can't figure out what happened between the two of them that made her so upset. Guess I'll have to think about it a little longer. :) Anyway, hope the next chapter comes out soon! Don't leave us in suspense too long! :)
Author's Response: Hey! thanks for this review! I'll just update it... And Daisy and Chris? *grins*
I am glad for Daisy and Chris....and I sorta knew when Hermione gave the address to Ginny that she was an imposter...If I had been Harry, I wouldn't have allowed for anyone besides him, Parvati, Hermione, and Ron to have access to the house......
Author's Response: Hey! Just wanted to tell you that it's awesome how you review so regularly! It really makes my day to see your thoughts... :) As for D/C... Hehe, one of them deserves to be throttled. LOL.
OK,.... creepy enough for me, my son's name is Andrew Paul. Did a bit of weird to me to see his name in print, as that of a dead man. Otherwise i am enjoying the story so far.
Author's Response: Haha, sorry about that! I'm sure your Andrew won't ever be in a situation like this, so don't worry. :)
nice update
Author's Response: Thank you!!!
Overall - upping the mystery, definitively! :) I like the balance between slowing introducing the new characters, revealing new pieces of the puzzle and new information, but keeping us intrigued.
Irene - blah! She is stinky. But is there an ulterior motive? Hmmmm…glad Hermione is suspicious.
Hermione needs to give a good Dracoesque punch to Ron and have a nice shouting match like they used to have. Maybe it'll get him all good and riled up…haha. But seriously, I felt bad for her! But, I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt....for now.
And Harry…*sigh. He was so sweet in the beginning of the chapter. Ugh! But staring at Ginny like that, right in front of Pavarti! For shame!
Ginny snuggling with Naina is super cute, though a bit sad, as I'm sure a (large) part of her wishes she were snuggling with her and Harry's own child.
I'm still very impressed with your characterization, especially of Pavarti. A great illustration of this is when they are talking about why the killer, if they are obsessed with Harry, would want her dead. Any normal person can see the selfish nature in people, but Pavarti doesn't - she wants the person she loves to be happy, and is confusing the love with obsession. I still think that sometimes Harry's reactions to Ginny are over the top, such as when he stares at her or stutters, right in front of his wife.
I’m assuming a crèche is a crib?
I was surprised when Ron told Rebecca that "Of course, and if you want, you can decide the punishment. Is that okay?” That seemed somewhat…unprofessional? Would he be allowed to do that? But Rebecca Palmer seems like a very complex and intriguing person, and I'll be interested to see what she has to say in the next chapter.
Hmmmm...this is the chapter I took the least amount of notes on, so this won't be as fulfilling (if the other ones can be considered so) as the other chapters.
Charaterization is still on par...Harry trusting his gut instinct at the end of the chapter, Pavarti trusting him, Hermione being a terrible liar are just a few examples.
I thought the scene at the table was great. I was waiting for her hair to set on fire or something - Irene's. Something about the way you wrote Pavarti made me seriously respect her - and feel bad for her, what a horrible person! I hope Hermione comes up with something horrible as revenge for her that is sneaky like Marietta's SNEAK face or something.
It should be quite interesting in that house with these personalities and relationship dynamics. And the personal aspect of the case itself.
And what is up with Ron?!
Once again, I am impressed with your characterization. I have an immense dislike for stories where Ron is a bumbling idiot or has no real part, and you have matured Ron and made him an Auror partner, a father, and a husband. His ability to see the reality behind Harry and Pavarti's relationship, and to notice what is happening with Harry and Ginny is something due to maturity and, probably, his relationship with Hermione. And yet, he's still Ron. My favorite: "You look prettier than the way you looked at Harry's wedding! How do you women manage this?"
And Hermione's response: "Stop flattering me." :) She is so cute, researching Indian greetings, just for Harry's birthday party.
Some suggestions on ways to explain thigs better to the readers: There is a paragraph towards the middle where the food is being explained, there are parenthsis when Pavarti is explaining out loud. I'm not sure if dialogue normally has parenthesis, so maybe the beginning would be something like: "That is dhal makhani, which has black lentils and a cream gravy; the palak paneer is cubes of cottage cheese in a spinach puree; and this here is called chicken tandoori masala, where the pieces of chicken are in an orange gravy.
Or, if the descriptions are soley for our sake, and the party-goers can see that chicken tandoori masala is chicken in orange gravy, then it could be as simple as adding an ending A/N explaining what they are.
As I'm now reading that part with my notes, I have to comment that I liked that Harry couldn't eat the spicy foods. Maybe it's because I imagined Pavarti and Padme (and maybe Ginny, hehe) could.
There was an inconsistency in that Hermione and Ron had to drive, but the Weasley family could Disapparate home.
And oh, I couldn't believe Harry was so insensitive to say that about Ginny fancying him at school! I wasn't even worried about Pavarti's reaction, because she remembered, I was more concerned because I thought Ginny was sitting at the table! Talk about an uncomfortable situation...jerk! But Ginny and Pavarti had a lovely conversation, and once again I am struck by how wonderful you characterize everyone.
Hmmmm...romance! Love triangle! :) I really enjoy the way this story is written, it is very enjoyable and easy to read. Again, for the most part I really like the characterization of pretty much everyone, lol. Father!Harry is just a dear, and his daughter sounds extremely cute and like she has him wrapped around her finger. And he is so clueless about his surprise party, especially considering she gave him one the year before.
I am conflicted on how I feel about Harry and Ginny's initial meeting. Harry being older and married (with a child) - I'm not sure he'd be quite so blatant about how he feels about Ginny, if he even felt that way. Perhaps he would have felt conflicted at first, though that confusion was there, his behavior made it obvious - the staring and forgetting what was being asked of him. Ron was shocked he liked her in sixth year, so I'm not sure he would be so obvious now as an adult.
Harry does seem somewhat emotionally stunted still at times, but still true to his noble side. I found myself thinking he should NEVER let Pavarti know he is thinking that "he had to repay her by loving her as much as she loved him." Ouch! But I do agree, as a married women for three years now, that men are still, and will always be, clueless. :)
It made me giggle when they were talking about the murderer being a woman because they were a fan of Harry's. Not going to explore the fact that it might be a man in love with Harry?! He's so irresistible!! :)
I was surprised that no one told Ginny they were married. And Harry seemed to know she didn't know. I know Hermione explains it later, but I still thought it was odd. Someone getting married is a pretty big deal, so if she had come back from training, I would have assumed someone would have told her, especially considering he now also has a kid. Are we assuming that this is the first time she's coming into the country? I guess I'm surprise her mother was able to not say anything.
I totally wanted to run into the story and yell at Harry for yelling at Pavarti about her garlic! If that makes sense, lol. I like the career you've chosen for her, and the maturity level you've given her, while still maintaining her personality and the Pavarti we knew in the books.
One small note, I'm not sure that Hermione (or anyone) would say (as opposed to write in a note or something) "b'day".
Sorry if the review is haphazd...I read this a few days ago on paper, and I'm skimming through the notes I took down. Onto Chapter 3!
I thought, after your beginning A/N, that this chapter might become wordy and overwhelming about an event or a culture that I was unfamiliar with rather than a story, but I thought it was a beautifully written chapter that kept everyone in character and still managed to keep the reader informed of a new and beautiful ceremony. As there were a lot of steps and differences from Western culture (which, I may be completely off in assuming that a majority of readers are unfamiliar with this anyway), I was very impressed with how you interweaved the emotions and characterizations in with the explanations.
I thought the descriptions were lovely as well, in particular the description of Harry and his attire in the 2nd paragraph. I also (and this is something I think I'll be repeating) LOVE your characterization of Padme and Pavarti, Ron, and Harry. I think it's spot on. Ron's "pep talk" to Harry before the wedding, Pavarti as the bride and helping Harry out, Padme watching her twin get married, and Harry - so nervous but unwilling to not go through with it. I particularly like the part where he has to put the vermillion on her part and he "stares at it numbly" for a second before being able to do it.
I was confused in the first paragraph what it said "the people belonging to the bride's side were wearing traditional Christian gowns and suits while the people from the side of the bridegroom were dressed in saris and sherwanis - the traditional Hindu attire." | Is that backwards?
When it mentions Ginny and Percy, it says that "Percy was still staying separately" and was thus not invited to the wedding. Does that mean he's still in strife with the rest of the family? It was worded oddly, but that was the impression that I got.
Overall, I am interested to see how Harry's life turns out with Pavarti...though the summary leads me to believe it's not all roses and sunshine! :)