Name: Jadecadence (Signed) · Date: 10/26/14 8:11 · For: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me

I leapt into this story because it's a nextgen fic,.. I didn't read your author's name but will do so after this. I think this was very well-written and has a style of its own. Makes me think you're british though.

Name: WeasleyMom (Signed) · Date: 06/16/14 0:07 · For: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me

Nicole, my fellow Puff! Greetings. I'm so glad this fic was featured. I knew you were planning to finish what you were working on for the romance class, but must have missed this when it came through the queue. I was surprised to see you only had two reviews for this, and then amused after I read them. This is the beauty of how you write: it's so (beautifully) out-of-the-box that readers aren't sure what to do with it. It seems to have provoked a lot of questions, which isn't a bad thing. Style is something readers will always disagree upon as it boils down to personal taste. But I happily own to being a huge, huge fan of the way you write. Your subject matter tends to be darker than what I generally read, but I'm positively addicted to the way you use words. In your hands, they bend and twist until they are inside-out... it's a beautiful, creative way to say what you want to say.

This fic was no exception.

I like the first-person voice you chose for Scorpius. He must love her but we don't really have that language going on. I found the hug at the sea quite moving and the understated frustration he felt as how reluctant Rose was to be touched. These are flawed characters and unusual ones, too, which you accentuated by giving us Lily-Lou's perspective on it all. Fruitcakes, indeed.

At first, I wasn't sure if Rose was real or not. Even thought you used the word ghost, I didn't take you literally since you are the master of metaphor. Plus, Scorpius was obviously drunk and depressed, so I wasn't sure how reliable his perspective was at that point. But once that became clear, the fic did settle into a kind of sadness and remain there. I say "a kind" because Rose's Peeves-like behavior kept the fic from becoming truly depressing, and yet, she's dead and he's alone and uncertain, and if that's not sad, I don't know what is. I felt so sad that Rose chose not to gon, and even sadder for Scorpius. What will this mean for him? Will he never be able to move on from her, I wonder, if she is still there? The fic doesn't need to answer all these questions. Rather, the questions are part of the story.

I can't help wondering... Did you consider putting this in D/A? Or did you feel it would get more reads in NG? Just curious, as I think it would have done well in either category.

The jumping around in time kept me on my toes. In theory, I think non-linear fics are a great idea, but I am such a linear thinker that they do force me to squint and concentrate more than I usually care to when reading for pleasure. I managed to keep up for the most part in this though. I do think it was effective to begin the way you did, with his return and the party and the discovery of Rose at the window... so the story could not have been told in order.

This is probably an unusual review but this fic is unusual, so maybe it's all right. Halfway through, I realized I've never read anything in else in fanfic remotely like this story. Quite an accomplishment, in my estimation, especially for Scorose.

I enjoyed this, Nicole, as I did all the work you did for the class. Happy writing! ~Lori

Author's Response:

Lori! :D Hello, my fellow Badger!

Can I say that this is absolutely one of the best reviews I've received in a very very long time?!?! I honestly don't know how to respond, and right now I'm so grateful and flabbergasted by all your compliments, and OK, I'm also feeling a bit guilty because I don't know whether I deserve all that praise you've heaped on me, but whatever - I just want to say a massive THANK YOU. Seriously. This review has just about made my entire week!

It means a lot to me, what you've said about my writing and about this piece; I really, really enjoyed writing this story. I post my fics up on other sites on the internet, and I must say that this piece has the most reads out of my other stories; I suspect that it's because this is a ScoRose. Yet this is also one of my stories which people don't seem to really like. And I understand, completely. It's really long for a one-shot; nothing really happens (all the fun is past and gone), and there's a bit of a downer ending. And it somehow just demands a lot from the reader - at least I think it does. So I always find it hugely flattering when someone reads to the end about Scorpius and Rose's long, difficult relationship.

Rose is definitely dead and a ghost in this fic. I have this tendency in my writing to downplay things a lot in my stories. Rose is a ghost? So she is. :) I love your comment about how the questions are part of the story. You're right; few questions are answered in this story, and I like to think that it's because Scorpius and Rose don't really know. They don't know what to do or where to go from where they currently are. Death is usually the final thing for characters and for stories, but that boundary's been crossed already, and both Scorpius and Rose are still there. There's hardly a happy ending; in fact, there's hardly an ending for the two of them. This story is just a small part of their lives that continue beyond the narrative.

Hmm, I never actually thought of putting this fic in D/A! I suppose there's some angst in it - but I honestly thought it was a more general story than one which revolved around a darker theme. But it really doesn't matter where this is placed in, I guess. Also, I'm glad the non-linear style of this fic didn't bother you too much! I enjoy non-linear stories a lot, writing and reading them!

Thank you so much once again, Lori, for your absolutely wonderful review! You're honestly amazing, and I hope to see you round on the boards soon! *hugs*

Nicole

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 12/12/13 13:18 · For: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me

Not quite sure what to say. Different.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing. :)

Name: Fynnsmom (Signed) · Date: 12/11/13 16:48 · For: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me

In the first place, this was well-written. It was depressing though. I guess I feel that the life of a ghost must be depressing and boring. I'm not sure how Rose died. Was she in a car accident? Was it suicide? I also couldn't tell how old Rose was. I thought they were young but maybe they were older. I was confused by Lily's "arthritic" eyebrow. I hope you don't think that I'm being negative. I liked the story--just thought it was sad:D I'd like to read more of your work.

Author's Response: Hiya! Wow, thanks for this lovely review, and thanks so much for reading to the end! :D This isn't a short fic, so I really do appreciate it. I'm sorry it depressed you :( I was trying to not make it too depressing, but oh dear. I suppose with the subject matter it is quite inevitable. It was a Muggle car accident that killed Rose; I only dropped the smallest reference to her death right at the very end, because I didn't want readers to dwell on the exact nature of her death - it was irrelevant to the story. Sorry about Lily's arthritic eyebrow, bahaha! That was me being a bit fanciful, really. I just imagined her having this incredibly stiff and thinly-plucked eyebrow. I shall probably use less vague description in the future.

Hmm, I'm guessing Rose and Scorpius and Lily are somewhere in their twenties. I do not think you're being negative at all! This was a lovely review, and it was very helpful as well! Thank you for reading once again, and for taking the time to leave me such great feedback. :D

-teh