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Hi, Kylie,
This is Vicki of Slytherin House. Welcome to Mugglenet Fanfiction. I enjoyed reading your prologue to a story that promises mystery, adventure, and surprises. Your writing style is graceful and the sentences flow smoothly. I particularly like the image of the maple tree, with its falling leaves (doubtless red, orange, and yellow) swirling around the large black dog. What a pretty picture!
You have packed a lot of information into this little prologue. There are no wasted lines or “filler†phrases. The prologue seems to form a firm foundation for whatever is going to ensue. I am looking forward to reading the next chapters.
Thank you for writing.
Vicki
I enjoyed it so far. I'm interested in knowing who Avalon's father is and what Sirius is doing sitting under a nearby tree. I look forward to your next chapter.