Summary: Nymphadora Tonks lives under a shadow. Both her cousin and her aunt are in Azkaban believed to be in league with Voldemort. She knows Bellatrix deserves to be there- but Sirius?
Remus Lupin is an outsider. He’d once had three good friends- now two are dead and the third has been locked up for murder and betrayal.
They had met once before, when she was a child, but as Tonks grows up they find themselves thrown together- far too closely for Remus’ comfort. He’s always yearned for a normal life but knows that is impossible. Can Tonks convince him that he deserves happiness?
Nominated for a 2009 QSQ award in the Best canon Romance category. Thank you.
Categories: Remus/Tonks Characters: None
Warnings: Mild Profanity, Sexual Situations, Strong Profanity
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 21
Completed: No
Word count: 121429
Read: 114110
Published: 10/20/08
Updated: 03/18/11
Story Notes:
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling and I never will be. I'm just having some fun in her world.
The warning is for later chapters.
Many Thanks to Terri (mudbloodproud) for beta'ing this fic. Also to Cassie, Alyssa, Azhure and Afifa who have also beta'd parts of it.
There is a prissy glitch on the site which won't let stories above 3rd-5th to be read. Therefore I have lowered the rating for this story. It is still a 6th-7th (although that's playing very safe)
1. Chapter 1- Cool! by Equinox Chick
2. Chapter 2- More of a Miss than a Kiss by Equinox Chick
3. Memories and Revelations by Equinox Chick
4. Chapter 4 - Grudge Match by Equinox Chick
5. Chapter 5- Opportunities by Equinox Chick
6. Chapter 6 - Old Mad-Eye by Equinox Chick
7. Chapter 7 - Damsel in Distress by Equinox Chick
8. Chapter 8 "Expecto Patronum!" by Equinox Chick
9. Chapter 9 - The Raid by Equinox Chick
10. Chapter 10 - The Seeker by Equinox Chick
11. Chapter 11 -Old Stories and New Friends by Equinox Chick
12. Chapter 12 Tea at the Tonks' House by Equinox Chick
13. Chapter 13 - Old Marauders Never Die by Equinox Chick
14. Chapter 14 - Disillusioned by Equinox Chick
15. Chapter 15 - Truth Will Out by Equinox Chick
16. Chapter 16 - Old Dogs and New Tricks by Equinox Chick
17. Chapter 17 - Interrogation by Equinox Chick
18. Chapter 18 - Double Bluff by Equinox Chick
19. Chapter 19 - Old Flames by Equinox Chick
20. Chapter 20 - It's not only Bludgers that cause pain. by Equinox Chick
21. Chapter 21 - Work, Rest and Play by Equinox Chick
Chapter 1- Cool! by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
In November 1979, Sirius Black receives a letter from the cousin he hasn’t seen for years. She needs him to look after her daughter, a girl he last saw three years before. Sirius isn’t used to kids but Meda needs him and he doesn’t want to let her down.
Andromeda Tonks arrived at the flat promptly at eleven in the morning. Dressed in fine robes, she looked every inch a lady, every inch a Black. The only thing detracting from this haughty image was the child she held by the hand, a child who was beaming with excitement. Andromeda smiled indulgently; Nymphadora excited was a wonderful sight to see as her hair kept changing like a kaleidoscope.
“Where is he, Mum? Where’s my cousin?” she asked as she hopped from one foot to the other in the fire grate.
“Probably still asleep,” replied Andromeda. “If he’s anything like I remember!”
“I’ve been up for hours!” protested a voice that came from across the room.
Andromeda looked across at the black haired young man lounging in an armchair. The room was stark looking, a far cry from his bedroom at Grimmauld Place that he’d festooned with Gryffindor hangings of red and gold. She supposed that with no parents to annoy, Sirius had altered his taste to suit himself. In this room the walls were white and the furniture black. He had hung no pictures on the wall, save for a large photo of himself and his friends that he'd fixed on the wall above the sofa. She recognised James Potter in his Quidditch robes, because Sirius had brought him to visit once, but the other two were unfamiliar.
Sirius got up from the chair and helped them out of the fireplace.
“Meda,” he greeted her with a kiss which she returned warmly. “It’s been too long.” He turned to the little girl. “And you must be Nymphadora?” he said formally. He wasn’t used to children.
“Must I?” she said quickly. He laughed in surprise - this kid had spirit.
“She hates her name,” said Andromeda sighing, “but then every child hates their name.”
“Actually, I always quite liked mine,” replied Sirius, “but I never let on or my old ma would have changed it to Ursa Major or something! Sit down while I get some drinks and biscuits.”
Andromeda looked at her watch. “I’m sorry, Sirius, I can’t stay. I need to catch Cissy before Lucius returns.”
“I still don’t understand why you’re going to see her- after all she’s done.”
“I don’t really know either. I just know that she’s asked to see me and after all these years it’s still Cissy I miss the most,” replied Andromeda. She looked down at her daughter who was staring at them both. “Nymphadora, why don’t you go and find some biscuits? I’m sure Sirius has some in the kitchen over there.”
Mulishly, the little girl pushed out her lower lip but she walked off in the direction of the kitchen. Andromeda watched her go. “I can’t take her with me, you understand...”
“You suspect a trap?” cut in Sirius sharply.
“No,” she replied. “Not a trap. But the Family didn’t take well to my marriage or my daughter so I don’t want to expose her to that. I need someone I can trust to take care of her.”
Sirius looked at her intently. Through the open door he could see Nymphadora skipping back with a handful of biscuits. Her hair was a shock of gold. She caught him looking at her, screwed up her face and instantly it changed to black, like his. He laughed, delighting in his cousin.
“Come here, Nymphadora. Let’s see if we can think of something fun to do together till your Mum gets back.”
She put her head on one side and considered. “Only if you stop calling me Nymphadora,” she said after a while.
“Deal!” Sirius agreed then he turned to Andromeda.
“Go, Meda, she’ll be fine with me.”
Andromeda gave him a quick kiss then bent down to hug her daughter close to her. “Be good, Nymphadora,” she whispered. Then she stepped into the fire and vanished.
"So,” said Sirius as they watched her Floo away, “what do I call you? Nymph?”
“No!” She sounded disgusted.
“Dora?” he suggested.
“Yuck, that’s what Daddy calls me. I hate that too.”
“What’s wrong with Dora?” asked Sirius who was anxious to get it right.
“I adore ya, Dora- that’s what he says. It’s yucky, kissy, girly stuff,” she retorted.
“Too young for all that, eh?” asked Sirius.
“I’m six and eight months,” she said, drawing herself up to her full height. “Of course I don’t like kissing boys- they’re silly.”
Sirius snorted; he was pleased little girls grew up.
“Sirius, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, squirt, what is it?”
“What do you call your friends?”
“Err...James, Remus and Peter although...” he paused, “I don’t often call them by their first names- unless I’m angry- we have nicknames.”
“What are they?” she enquired.
“James is Prongs, Remus is Moony and Peter is Wormtail,” he replied.
“What silly names. I’d rather be something cool. What do they call you?” she asked.
“Padfoot. Is that cool?” He widened his eyes imploringly in what he hoped was a cute manner.
She considered. “S’okay I suppose. Better than Moony - that's just silly!”
Sirius chuckled, “Remus will be so pleased to hear that.”
“So, what can I be?” she demanded belligerently.
“Well,” he said carefully. “What’s your second name?”
“Tonks,” she said promptly.
“Don’t you have a middle name?”
“No, Daddy decided Nymphadora was a big enough name,” she recited as though she’d heard her dad’s tale many times.
“Okay,” he pretended to think really hard. “Right then, I’m going to tell you something top secret now.”
Her eyes widened in anticipation.
“I,” he whispered, “often attend meetings with very important people and what we do there is use people’s surnames so... how about I call you Tonks?”
“Yes,” she breathed excitedly. “Tonks is cool.”
“Now then, Tonks,” he said in mock seriousness. “Some of my friends are coming over later but before then shall I take you out?”
“Out where?” she sounded excited.
“London, sweetheart, London.”
Her face lit up then her lip drooped.
“Oh,” she said quietly, “I can’t.”
“Why not?” asked Sirius.
She sat down on a big squashy black beanbag. “I’m not allowed out.”
“Pardon!” said Sirius, his eyes goggling at her.
“I’m not allowed out because of my hair,” she said sadly.
“What’s wrong with your hair?”
“It changes colour when I get too excited- it’s quite naughty.”
“Is that all?” he said. “Listen to me, young Tonks, there are lots of Muggles out there with strange coloured hair “ they won’t even notice you.”
“Sometimes it changes without me doing anything,” she said dolefully.
Sirius thought briefly then sauntered over to the closet next to the front door.
“Catch,” he said. She gasped. It was a motor-cycle helmet.
“C’mon, Tonks, we’re going out in style!”
Down in the basement underneath his flat, Sirius kept his pride and joy- a Harley Davidson. It had been the first thing he’d bought with Uncle Alphard’s money. A broken down wreck of a thing, he’d forced the Marauders to work on it until it looked like new. It rode like a dream. Sirius was never happier than when he was astride his machine.
“Okay, Tonks. I’m going to fix you on the back using a mild sticking charm, but you must hold on to me so it looks as if we’re normal Muggles. Got that?”
“Yep!” she squealed. He looked down at her, watching a red wave ripple through her long hair. He wondered how hard it was for her growing up in fear of being discovered.
“Godric, Tonks! I don’t care what you say, you really are adorable.” He picked her up and twirled her round and round until she was shrieking with delight. Then, placing her on the back of the bike, he got on and they set off.
Sirius rode superbly around the streets of London. Weaving in and out of cars, Tonks could hear him being tooted at by angry drivers, annoyed with his impudence. He wore no helmet so when they slowed down at the traffic lights she could see girls in tight jeans eyeing him up and occasionally whistling approval. He tossed his hair and smiled at one or two of the prettier ones. Finally they arrived at a small park. He stopped and lifted her off the bike.
“What about my hair?” she asked anxiously, as he tried to remove the helmet.
“What’s your favourite colour?” he whispered.
“Pink,” she said.
He raised his eyebrows. “Really, I’d have thought that too girly for you.” He could sense she was frowning at him from beneath the helmet. “Okay, Tonks, here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to let you have pink hair while we sit in this park and if your hair dares to change then I’ll stick this helmet back on and we’ll ride around for a bit longer - okay?”
She grinned up at him.
“You’re funny,” she said.
“And cool?” he asked hopefully.
“A little bit,” she agreed.
He walked with her over to a small playground. Muggle children were playing on swings, slides and roundabouts. Tonks walked over and sat on an empty swing. She began to push her legs and back forwards and backwards, forwards and backwards to make the swing move higher and higher. Sirius watched her and thought bitterly of his own childhood. Barely allowed out into the Muggle world unless they were travelling between Wizard destinations he’d always longed for the simplicity of a large open field or park. He remembered a visit to his cousins’ house.
***
They’d lived near a Muggle village and he’d seen children playing cricket on the Village Green at its centre. He’d asked Walburga if he could join them but she’d shot him a look of such coldness that he’d known not to press it. Andromeda had watched as his eyes had fallen to the floor. She’d been sixteen at the time and the resemblance to her beautiful sister, Bellatrix, was striking. But Bellatrix had always had a darker side - darker even than black - lurking in her eyes, a darkness that repelled Sirius. Andromeda had held out her hand to him and told her Aunt she’d take him into the garden and would watch him carefully. Once in the garden she’d run with him to a gap in the fence and urged him to squeeze through.
“Along that path is the Village Green,” she’d said. “I’ll take you.”
“But what about Aunt Druella?” he’d asked fearfully. “Won’t she be awfully angry?”
She winked at him. “I said I’d take you into the garden and I said I’d watch you, but I deliberately didn’t say where I’d be watching you, Sirius.”
He remembered the fun he’d had playing with boys his own age, who’d been more than happy to let a stranger in to share their game and he’d discovered that Andromeda had her own reason for coming down to the Green.
She’d been joined by a tall, fair-haired boy who’d sat beside her on the grass, holding her hand and gently stroking her chestnut brown hair.
“Sirius,” she’d called when she saw him looking. “This is Ted, a friend from school.” She’d got up and brushed the grass from her skirt.
“We must get back,” she had said. Ted had leapt up and kissed her gently on the lips then held her close.
“Come on, Sirius,” she’d said and there was regret in her voice.
“Is Ted coming too?” he’d asked.
She’d laughed bitterly. “No, he can’t. My darling mother would Crucio me. You mustn’t tell, Sirius. You mustn’t say you’ve seen him. I trust you.”
His grey eyes had looked into her dark brown ones that were beseeching him.
“You can trust me, Meda, always.”
***
“What are you thinking about, Sirius?” said a voice, dragging him back to the present day. Tonks had evidently finished on the swing and was standing next to him.
“Your mum and dad,” he said, smiling down at her. He led her to an empty bench. “Did you know they were at school together?”
“Mmm, I know. Daddy said he met Mummy in detention.”
Sirius laughed. “That doesn’t sound like your mum.”
“Daddy said that after that they used to be naughty so they could get detention together,” she said chirpily.
“The sneaky pair- that’s very clever.”
“Mummy tells me I mustn’t do anything so silly,” said Tonks wisely.
Sirius shrugged. “She’s probably right. What House was your dad in?”
“Hufflepuff,” she replied immediately. “My mum was in Slytherin.” She looked up at him. “And you were in Gryffindor.”
“Yep, ‘where dwell the brave at heart!’“ he quoted.
“Is it fun, Hogwarts? I can’t wait to go.”
“It’s the best, young Tonks,” he said as he took her small hand in his and sighed regretfully. “Come on, we need to get back or your mum will Crucio me!”
However when they got back to his flat it was not Andromeda that met them but an owl. Quickly Sirius took its letter and read through the contents. He frowned slightly as he folded up the letter.
“Okay, Tonks, your Mum’s been delayed and has asked if you can stay the night.” He looked down into her face, the merry smile had gone and she looked suddenly vulnerable. He crouched down beside her.
“Hey, there’s nothing to worry about, squirt. Your mum’s fine. She’s just got held up talking with your Aunt Narcissa and your dad’s away. So what do you say? Do you want to spend the night here?”
She didn’t say anything; just bit her lip in an attempt to stop it trembling. He reached over and hugged her.
“I’m not that bad, am I?” he whispered.
“No,” she sniffed. “I guess you’re cool.”
He got up, pulled her to standing and gently ruffled her still pink hair.
“That colour is great on you, Nymphadora. Not at all girly!”
She smiled a wide smile that split her face in two, reached inside him and wrung out his heart.
“Sirius, you promised not to call me Nymphadora. It’s Tonks, remember.”
He chuckled, “C’mon Tonks, let’s find you some tea.”
He led the way into his kitchen. Unlike the lounge, this room was cluttered with pots, pans and recipe books. The sink was piled high with dirty plates and bowls.
“It’s a good job your mum didn’t see this room, she’d never have left you here,” he said. He clattered around the place looking for a clean bowl then went to the fridge.
“My omelettes are legendary, Tonks. They even satisfy the stomach of the mighty James Potter. What I do with eggs and a pan makes the House-Elves of Hogwarts look like amateurs.”
She pursed her lips. “I’m ‘lergic to eggs,” she said.
“You’re what?”
“Allergic to eggs. They make me itchy and blotchy,” she said.
“How strange,” he said frowning. “What colour blotches?”
She smiled mischievously, “Whatever colour I want- but don’t tell Mummy, I hate eggs.”
He grinned. “Okay no eggs. Let me see what else I can scrape together. Do you eat much Muggle food?”
She shook her head.
“Then try this, my little partner-in-crime.”
Juggling three potatoes in his hand he pulled out his wand, peeled them, found a clean saucepan and set them to boil. Then he walked over to his freezer and found a pack of something. He pulled out three long orange rectangles and placed them under his grill. Finally after rummaging in his cupboard he found a small dusty tin right at the back.
Twenty minutes later she was eating fish-fingers, mash and spaghetti hoops.
“Thish ish sho cool!” she said as she piled more food into her mouth.
He flipped her nose. “Don’t speak with your mouth full!” The words were an echo of his mother but the tone and gesture very different.
She swallowed. “I like your home, Sirius. Can I come again?”
“We’ll see. Mummy might decide you’re a bad influence on me.”
She giggled at his silliness. There was a knock at the door. Sirius frowned slightly.
“Stay there and keep quiet,” he said.
“Is it a baddie?” she said, her eyes widening like saucers.
He smiled at her “I don’t think they’d knock, sweetheart. It’s probably just a Muggle trying to convert me.”
“Sirius, open up, I’m freezing,” said a girl’s voice.
He went to the door and opened it.
“You took your time,” she said looking him up and down. “Fully dressed, I see, so it can’t be a woman.” She walked into the hallway. Through a crack in the door, Tonks could see her give Sirius a warm hug and a kiss.
“We’re having tea,” Sirius said. “You’re a bit early. I didn’t expect you until seven and certainly not by the front door.”
“’We’” she said interrupting him. “Sirius, you have got a girl here, where is she?”
He pointed to the kitchen and she walked through stopping as she saw the pink haired girl with spaghetti hoops all over her face.
“Oh aren’t you adorable!” she cried. Instantly Tonks frowned and Sirius laughed. The young woman realised she’d made a faux pas “Not in a cute way, obviously, but in a totally cool way- especially the hair-wow that’s amazing!” she babbled.
“Are you Sirius’ girlfriend?” asked Tonks.
“I wish,” sighed Sirius as he put his arm around the young woman’s waist. “I’m just waiting for her to come to her senses and dump that shiftless husband of hers.”
“Get off, you fool,” she said smiling up at him then she turned back to Tonks. “No, I’m not his girlfriend; I’m married to his friend, his best friend I should say, James Potter. My name’s Lily. Who are you?”
Tonks looked over at Sirius who nodded reassuringly.
“I’m Tonks - Sirius’ cousin.” She wiped her hand on the front of her shirt and held it out. “Pleased to meet you.” Lily accepted the hand and sat down.
“Where’s Prongs?” said Sirius.
“Parking the car,” replied Lily.
“You drove, why?” said Sirius incredulously.
“No reason.” She sounded vague then turned back to Tonks. “So how do you get your hair like that? Did Sirius dye it? He is going to be in so much trouble with your mummy.”
Tonks giggled, “I’m a Metamorphamagus. I can change it myself - look,” she screwed up her face and they both watched as her hair changed to a dark red, the same colour as Lily.
Lily laughed with delight. “That’s ador...” she stopped, “...brilliant!”
They heard a voice in the hallway. “Door’s open so I’ve come straight through. Don’t tell me you caught him with yet another woman, Lily?”
Tonks saw a man walk in with black messy hair and glasses. He slapped Sirius on the back then stopped to look at his wife sitting next to a little girl with hair the exact same shade.
“Godric! Have we just jumped forwards in time?” Then he smiled. “I think I’ve met you before, a long time ago, when you were a lot smaller - Nymphadora Tonks, right?”
“Just Tonks, she said determinedly then looking him straight in the eye she said, “You’re Prongs, aren’t you?”
“That’s right. Hey Padfoot, are you planning on training her up as a future Marauder?” he said as he walked over to the chill-charmed cupboard and brought out two bottles of beer. He chucked one at his friend.
“Err, there’s wine in there or beer if Lily wants one,” said Sirius frowning. James wasn’t usually this unchivalrous.
"Relax, Padfoot, I’ll get her something, don’t you worry. Lily, there’s only Pumpkin juice here or some rather green looking milk - urgh!”
She grimaced, “Just water, darling.”
Sirius was puzzled. He watched as James found a clean glass added some ice and filled it with water. “Are you making her drive home, or something? Is that why you’re not drinking, Lily? Look there’s plenty of room here. Or you can leave the car here and Apparate home. I still don’t understand why you brought the car?”
James sighed. “Apparition isn’t safe for Lily in her condition.”
Tonks looked at Sirius’ face as it changed expression from puzzlement to comprehension.
“Aw, a new playmate for me, another Potter to corrupt.” He bent down and hugged Lily tightly then jumped back. “Oh Godric! Am I allowed to hug you? It won’t hurt him will it?”
“Of course not,” said Lily as she gently traced her fingers over her tummy.
James opened his beer, clunked it to Sirius’ and took a large swig.
“Sirius,” asked Tonks. “How did the baby get inside Lily’s tummy?”
Both men spat beer onto the floor; Sirius in shock whilst James was crying with laughter.
“Err...I’m not sure I should be telling you this, Tonks. Perhaps we should wait for your mum,” stuttered Sirius.
“But she’s not here, Padfoot,” laughed James, “and she’s asking you.”
“Don’t you know?” said Tonks. She turned to Lily who was trying not to laugh. “Sirius doesn’t know, does he? Will you tell me?”
James was sniggering behind Lily who shot him an exasperated look.
“Well,” she said taking in a deep breath. “It’s like this. When a Mummy and Daddy really love each other, the Daddy,” she pointed to James, “sort of um...plants a seed inside the Mummy’s tummy. She has an egg there and it err...grows into a baby.”
Tonks looked at James. “How do you plant the seed?”
It was Sirius’ turn to laugh.
“Err...very carefully,” said James, turning red.
“And lots of practise, eh Prongs?” snorted Sirius.
“So you didn’t mate, then?” said Tonks loudly.
The three grown-ups looked at her open mouthed.
“Tonks,” said Sirius. “What do you mean?”
She giggled naughtily, “Sirius, I’ve seen animals mating, you know. I do live near a farm!”
“So you know exactly how the baby’s got into Lily’s tummy?” Sirius asked.
“Uh huh, I just thought it would be fun to ask!”
They all laughed, and then Sirius raised his bottle. “To Baby Potter. May he have his mother’s looks and brains, and his father’s luck in friends.”
“It might be a her,” exclaimed Tonks. “You keep saying it’s a boy. How do you know?”
“Well said, Tonks!” replied Lily. “A girl would be a much better idea.”
They all sat round the table whilst she finished her tea. James looked longingly at the fish fingers and kept trying to pinch a bit. Tonks whacked his hand with her fork and he noticed her hair getting redder and redder.
“Whoa! Lily, she’s just like you when you’re getting mad at me.”
Lily started speaking to Sirius. “James believes in sharing the whole pregnancy experience, so whilst I get the morning sickness, he eats for two.”
There was a whoosh as a cloud of dust came from the next room, then another.
“Padfoot, where are you? It’s me and Peter,” cried a voice.
Tonks saw two dusty figures approach. The taller one was coughing and he looked tired. Lily picked up her wand almost absentmindedly and dusted them both down.
“Thanks, Lily,” he said as he bent down to kiss her cheek. Tonks noticed he had brown hair and a thin, slightly gaunt face.
“How are you, Remus?” said Lily, looking at him closely.
He placed one hand in front of him, palm down, and shook it from side to side. “So-so.” She squeezed his hand sympathetically and he smiled faintly - then he caught Tonks’ eye.
“Hello,” he said almost formally. “You must be Sirius’ wife.”
Tonks frowned at him “Are you Moony or Wormtail?” she demanded.
“M-Moony!” he said in surprise.
“That’s a really uncool nick-name,” she said, looking him straight in the eye. “Why did you choose it?”
He laughed loudly. “You must be a relative of his. Only Sirius is ever that rude to people.” Remus summoned a chair and sat next to her. James took some more beers out of the cupboard and handed him one. He opened it and took a swig.
“You’re right, it’s uncool but I didn’t choose it - Sirius did,” he said to her.
“Well it sort of chose you, Moony,” said Sirius under his breath.
“And that makes you Wormtail,” said Tonks turning her attention for the first time to the small man who’d crept in behind Remus. As she spoke her hair suddenly changed from dark red to an icy blue. Peter and Remus started back violently.
“Whoops!” she said chuckling as Peter sent his beer flying.
Sirius roared with laughter. “Sorry guys, she’s only six and she can’t always control it. This is my cousin’s girl, Nymphadora Tonks.”
“Just Tonks,” she growled. She peeped at them from beneath her spiky, now blue, fringe. Remus was smiling warmly appreciating the joke but Peter...she looked at him more carefully trying to assess him...Peter wasn’t smiling. Aware that she was scrutinising him he slipped on a fatuous smile and resumed drinking his beer.
When she’d finished, they all went into the lounge settling down in front of the fire. James started to sprawl on the sofa then sat up and let Lily lie across him. Peter took an armchair leaving Remus to sit on the floor whilst Sirius sat on a squashy bean bag with Tonks curled up on top of him. She’d changed into an old T shirt of his that sported the Gryffindor Lion. Lily moved her legs, “Remus, come on up here, you can’t be comfortable down there.”
“Lily, after last night I’m so tired I could sleep anywhere. I doubt I’d feel it if I slept on a bed of nails.”
Tonks pulled her mouth up to Sirius’ ear, “What did he do last night?” she asked inquisitively.
Remus turned to her, his hearing was incredibly acute in the days after transformation. Sirius gave him a long look then turned back to Tonks. “Moony, here, was out all night dancing at a club. You wouldn’t think it to look at him but he’s a huge hit on the dance-floor.”
She looked at Remus, “You’ve got lots of cuts on your face. Did you fall over a lot?”
He grimaced, “Something like that.”
“I do that, too. I’m very clumsy but I’m quite good at covering the bruises,” she told him as she yawned. Her eyelids were becoming heavy. She was aware of Remus looking at her and turned to see where Peter was. Again he was watching her with an expression she couldn’t understand.
Peter began to talk about his job. He’d just started at The Ministry and was working with Thorfinn Rowle.
“Urgh, I remember him!” exclaimed Lily. “Couldn’t keep his hands to himself.”
“You never told me that. I’d have stopped him,” blustered James.
“Oh for Godric’s sake, James,” she replied. “I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I had enough practise fending you off, didn’t I?”
James smiled ruefully as Sirius and Remus laughed- only Peter didn’t join in, seemingly lost in his thoughts.
“Thorfinn’s not bad, really,” he said. “He’s helped me anyway. It’s not been easy finding my feet at the Ministry.”
Tonks vaguely heard James mumble something about Slytherin but stopped when he caught Lily’s eye.
Lily looked across at Tonks. “She needs to be in bed, Sirius. I’ll take her.”
“No you don’t!” declared James, “I’m not having you lift anything heavier than parchment until next July.”
“What’s this?” asked Remus suddenly alert.
“She’s up the duff, mate,” said Sirius crudely.
Remus and Peter gasped, “Is this true?”
“Well not quite how we wanted to announce it, but yeah, Lily’s pregnant. We’re going to be parents.” James got up and walked across to Tonks. “And as I need the practise, I’ll put this one to bed.”
As James left the room, Lily turned to Sirius, “Why is she here? Are her parents okay? You’ve been looking at the fireplace off and on all evening.”
Sirius sighed. He looked around at the three of them. “Her mother’s my cousin, Andromeda Tonks. This morning I received a letter from her, first time in years, asking if I’d look after her daughter because she wants to visit her sister, Narcissa.”
“Narcissa Malfoy,” said Remus in horror.
“Uh-huh. She said she’d be an hour or two so I took Tonks out on the bike.” He ignored Lily’s raised eyebrows. “But when we got back, there’s no Meda, just a letter.” He paused to take another swig from his beer. “Turns out Narcissa’s pregnant and she only wanted to know about Meda’s pregnancy,” he said with disgust in his voice.
“That’s only natural, Sirius,” said Lily. “I’m desperate to talk to another woman. None of my friends are in this condition.” She smiled as she stroked her stomach.
“She didn’t want tips, Lily,” Sirius continued darkly. “She wanted to know what Meda did wrong so she can avoid it.”
“What do you mean,‘wrong’? said Remus strangely.
“My cousin, Narcissa, is a very suspicious witch. She thinks Meda’s daughter is the result of an accident or else is a punishment.”
“Why?” said Lily in bemusement.
Remus shook his head in disgust, finally understanding. He took Lily’s hand. “She’s a Metamorphamagus, Lily. They’re supposed to bring bad luck.”
There was a long pause while they all digested the sordid truth.
“So where’s Andromeda now?” whispered Lily.
“Well she got into a heated argument with Narcissa who drew her wand. Meda wouldn’t use hers on Narcissa because she’s pregnant so she ended up with a cut lip and arm. She didn’t want her daughter seeing that,” he replied.
***
Later that night when they’d left, Sirius crept into his room to check on his cousin. "Lumos!" he whispered and his wand cast a glimmer of light down on her. In repose her hair was light brown - the perfect blend of Ted and Andromeda.
“Night, night, Tonks,” he whispered gently.
She opened one eye. “I’m not asleep,” she said.
“Well, you should be. Your mum will kill me if you don’t get some rest,” he said as he sat down on the bed next to her.
“Can I come again?” she asked.
“Probably.”
“I’d like to see Lily again,” she murmured.
“Not the others?” he said.
“Well,” she said, turning her head to one side as she considered. “James was funny, but...”
“What is it? Are you scared of something, Tonks?”
She looked up at him, her big dark eyes looked slightly fearful.
“Is it Moony?” he said, wondering how on earth she’d managed to pick up that he was a werewolf and wondering how the hell he was going to explain to her that he wasn’t scary.
“No,” she replied. “It wasn’t Moony - he just seemed sort of sad.” She paused. “It was Peter.”
“Peter,” he said laughing. “He wouldn’t hurt a fly!”
“He didn’t like me,” she said stubbornly.
“Rubbish!” declared Sirius. “Everyone loved you. They all thought you were cool.”
She smiled wanly and lay back on the pillow, his words were reassuring but she remained unconvinced.
***
Nearly two years later, Sirius was thrown into a cell in Azkaban. She’d been right, he thought, it was Moony, not Wormtail, we should have trusted.
And in a corner of England a girl who was eight years and eight months old curled up on her bed crying. In her hand she clutched a faded Gryffindor T-shirt.
“He didn’t do it,” she sobbed. “He would never have betrayed them.”
End Notes:
I hope you enjoyed the story. Please take the time to leave a review.
Chapter 2- More of a Miss than a Kiss by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
It is eleven years since she first met her cousin, Sirius Black, and Tonks is starting her seventh year at Hogwarts. A bright and popular student she feels she still lives under the cloud of the Black Family.
She knows Sirius would not have turned traitor but convincing everyone around her is a hard task.
She needs the help of the one remaining Marauder- if only she can find him.
“If I get a detention because of this, I’ll kill you!” exclaimed the boy.
“Shut up! Just keep a look-out, will you? You won’t get detention because Snape won’t catch us as long as you do your job,” replied a girl’s voice from inside the storeroom.
“What’s taking so long? Tonks, what are you doing?” he asked anxiously.
“Flaming Phoenix, Weasley! You call yourself a Gryffindor? I thought you lot were supposed to be brave!” she whispered fiercely. “I’m just checking my list. I’m nearly done.”
There was a sudden clatter of boxes.
“Merlin’s Pants!” cursed Tonks. “Charlie, help me. I’ve dropped cockroach wings everywhere.”
Charlie sighed and entered Snape’s classroom. He wouldn’t mind if he knew what she was planning to brew but Tonks was being unusually secretive. He flicked his wand and the wings flew back tidily into their box.
“Can we go now?” he asked.
“Yeah, all sorted,” she replied.
They both walked towards the door.
“Not so fast, Miss Tonks and oh, of course, your sidekick, Mr Weasley,” said a voice.
Charlie groaned as he saw the imposing form of the Potions Professor in the doorway.
“Stealing from my storeroom, were you?”
“Not at all, Professor,” said Tonks. She held something in her hand. “It’s about my essay, actually. I need some help so I was looking for you. I tried the staff room but Professor Trelawney said you’d be here.”
“And Weasley has come along for what reason? He doesn’t do N.E.W.T. level Potions-barely scraping an Acceptable O.W.L. does not make him worthy of my class.”
Tonks, thinking fast, grabbed Charlie’s hand. “Well, Professor, we were on our way to Hogsmeade for Halloween but I wanted to see you first.”
“Hogsmeade, together,” said Snape witheringly. “How touching.”
He scrutinised them both closely. He did not for a moment believe her story about the essay but he couldn’t see any signs that they’d helped themselves to his stock. He must have caught them before they’d reached his storeroom.
“You have a problem then, Miss Tonks?” he asked, indicating her essay.
“Yes, that’s right. I wondered why in your lesson you deviated from the text book and included some other possible ingredients in our Euphoria potion?” She showed him her notes where she’d drawn a question mark under the word peppermint.
He was not fooled by the question. It sounded too rehearsed but he was impressed that she’d noticed his addition of peppermint. None of the others in the class had picked up on it.
“I find it counteracts nose tweaking,” he replied.
“Oh!” she said in surprise. “That’s brilliant, Professor Snape.”
He inclined his head acknowledging the compliment then said sarcastically, “Enjoy your ‘date.’”
Charlie grinned and squeezed Tonks’ hand taking the opportunity to move closer to her. They walked to the door together.
“Oh, Miss Tonks,” said Snape as she reached the corridor. “If, perhaps, you were thinking of brewing your own potion, in your own time, then I’m always around to advise. I like to encourage my students.”
She blushed and her hair seemed to turn even pinker. “Yes, Professor.”
“And another thing, no pink hair in class, normal brown will suffice.”
Tonks scowled. “Yes, sir,” she replied.
They ran hand-in-hand to the Entrance Hall.
“How in the name of all that is Magic did we get away with that?” whooped Charlie.
“I have no idea,” replied Tonks. Her breathing was unsteady. “Someone up there must like us.”
“You more like,” replied Charlie. “It’s Snape, he leurves you!”
She scowled at him. The fact that Snape often gave her preferential treatment was a source of much embarrassment to her.
“Where did you put all the ingredients then? Did you leave them behind?” he asked to change the subject.
She smiled and pulled him into a corner then lifted up her skirt to reveal very knobbly black tights. “I stuffed everything down there,” she giggled. “I figured Snape wouldn’t be able to bring himself to search me.”
Charlie averted his eyes. Tonks’ legs always had a strange effect on him. She didn’t notice his discomfort as she adjusted her clothes.
“I’m going back to my dorm to stash all this in my trunk. I’ll see you later, perhaps?” she asked as she turned away from him.
He pulled on her hand. “Oh no, Nymphadora! Snape thinks we’re on a date so I’m going to wait here for you and then we’ll go to Hogsmeade...together.”
Tonks sighed to herself. She owed Charlie, big time, and she guessed one date, one teeny-weeny date, couldn’t do any harm.
“Okay, Weasley, you’re on.”
“One more thing,” he said. “Can you call me Charlie for the rest of the day and not Weasley?”
“Yeah, fine, as long as you call me Tonks and not Nymphadora.”
“Deal!” he said. He bent forward to kiss her cheek but she’d already turned towards the staircase he knew led to the Hufflepuff Common Room.
Sighing, he sat on the floor and waited for her.
“Charlie’s got a girlfriend! Charlie’s got a girlfriend!” chanted two very familiar and very annoying voices from behind a suit of armour. His twin brothers appeared in front of him.
“Was that your first kiss?” asked Fred.
“More of a miss than a kiss, Charlie,” said George.
“Get lost you two,” Charlie replied in exasperation.
“Buy us something from Zonko’s then and we’ll leave you alone,” said Fred.
Charlie rolled his eyes. “I knew this would cost me. What do you want?”
George produced a list.
“I can’t get all this, guys. I don’t have enough money,” pleaded Charlie.
“We could always wait with you until Nymphadora comes back,” said Fred slyly.
“We could tell her that story about you and the Kneazle,” added George.
Charlie knew they had him. “Okay, two things from the list and that’s it.”
Down in her dorm, Tonks quickly divested herself of the potion ingredients. As she stashed them in her trunk she spilt some of the ground Newt powder over her T shirt. She patted it off, hoping it wouldn’t leave too much of a mark. At that moment one of her room mates came in.
“You going to Hogsmeade?” she asked, watching as Tonks straightened her skirt and scowled at her reflection. “Is it a date?”
“Uh-huh. I thought you’d already be there, Aggie.”
“I’m meeting Gregor later,” said Aggie. “Who are you going with?”
“Oh...err, just Charlie,” replied Tonks.
“Merlin, Tonks!” exclaimed Aggie. “You don’t sound very excited. Charlie Weasley is a fantastic Seeker and just about the most decent wizard in this place. There are girls here who’d chop off their wand arms to get a date with him!”
Tonks scuffed her shoes on the floor. “He’s a mate. I can’t think of him any other way.”
Aggie gave her a sceptical look. “Or won’t more like it. Come on, it might be fun.” She looked at Tonks’ mutinous face. “At least change your shirt and fix your hair.”
“What’s wrong with my hair?” asked Tonks defensively.
“Godric, you infuriate me! You’re lucky enough to be able to change your hairstyle whenever you want. You need never know the frustration of a bad hair day yet you always wear it short. Try pre-Raphaelite curls or something!” said Aggie.
Tonks pulled on a clean purple shirt then screwed up her face. “Will this do?” Her hair, now long, straight and purple slid down her back. “See, I’ve matched it to the top.”
Aggie sighed, “It’s a date, Tonks. Why don’t you go for something pretty and not wacky?”
Tonks scowled and screwed her face up again changing to blonde.
“Perfect!” squealed Aggie. “Now for the clothes...”
“No, I’m not changing anything else,” said Tonks as she ran for the door. “It’s only Charlie.”
She rushed up to the Entrance Hall just as the twins were leaving. Charlie looked at her blonde hair.
“Wow!” he exclaimed, his eyes on stalks, “you look fantastic.”
She blushed. “It’s only hair, Weasley- sorry- Charlie.”
He held out his hand hopefully and she took it.
Despite her protestations he took her to Madame Puddifoot’s.
“Charlie, this is gross,” she said, looking at the bright orange pumpkin decorations and ghost cut-outs that all seemed to be holding hands.
“Aw, come on, Tonks. Just go along with me for a change,” he said as he ordered hot chocolate and cauldron cakes for two.
“So,” he said when she was munching her way through her second cake, “are you going to tell me what potion you’re intending to brew?”
She shook her head. “S’better you don’t know, Charlie.”
“Hmph!” he grunted but he didn’t question her further. After another hot chocolate Charlie realised he was now desperately short of cash and still had to visit Zonko’s. He wondered how he could prolong the day with her. “Shall we go back to Hogwarts, now? We could have a walk by the lake or...”
“Go to the Three Broomsticks?” she finished.
“Oh!” he paused then flushed. “Tonks, I don’t really have enough money for that.”
She looked at him noting his embarrassment. “Charlie, I’ve got money. I don’t expect you to pay for me.”
“It’s a date,” he said bitterly. “I should be paying.”
She leant over and touched his cheek; the unexpected caress made him flush again. He looked across at her, unsure whether her reluctance to go back was due to her not wanting to spend time alone with him.
“How about I buy some Butterbeers and we drink them by the lake, then?” she said as a compromise.
“Okay, but I’ll pay you back,” he said stubbornly.
They walked out into the sunshine. It was bright for the last day in October.
“I need to go to Zonko’s,” Charlie sighed. “Do you want to come?”
Her eyes lit up. “I love Zonko’s, you know that.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him across the road. Charlie smiled as they entered Zonko’s; he should have skipped the coffee shop and just spent all his money here.
“What are you after?” she said.
“You,” he wanted to reply but instead said, “Gobstones-the Ghastly Ghoul series- and Tickling Turnips.”
“Really,” she exclaimed. “Bit childish for you!”
“It’s not for me, Tonks. It’s for the twins.”
“I’m teasing, Charlie. I think Tickling Turnips are fun,” she said.
After fifteen minutes spent examining different scented stink bombs they left and walked over to The Three Broomsticks to buy some Butterbeer. Then they began slowly walking back to Hogwarts.
He held her hand. “Maybe we can do this again, eh?”
Tonks thought to herself for a moment. She always had fun with Charlie and Aggie was right- he was decent. She squeezed his hand.
“Yeah, all right, Charlie,” she muttered.
“Really!” exclaimed Charlie, his face lighting up in a beaming smile. “You’ve just made my term!”
“Easy, Weasley, I’ve agreed to a second date- not an engagement,” she said but she was smiling. “Let’s take it slowly.”
“Tonks, It’s take me seven years to get to one date. How much slower can I go?” he grumbled.
It was starting to get dark and Tonks, who had forgotten her cloak, shivered. Charlie offered her his cloak and when she declined he put it around the both of them, holding her by the waist. She huddled in close to him. He turned her around to face him; he was half a head taller than her. Slowly he lowered his head and began to kiss her. At first she resisted but then started to relax and respond.
She broke away, grinning. “That was nice,” she said.
“Nice!” he exclaimed to the air. “That’s my best move and she says it’s ‘nice’”
“You’re best move, Weasley. Have you been practising?” she asked, laughing up at him.
He kissed her brow. “Never you mind, Nymphadora.”
She brought the conversation around to Quidditch. It was a game they both loved, a game that had cemented their friendship that first day on the Hogwarts Express. When Charlie had been picked as the Gryffindor Seeker in his second year, Tonks had felt her loyalties torn. It was wonderful to watch him fly. Then, in her fifth year she’d made it onto the Hufflepuff team as a Chaser. For one so clumsy, she flew like a dream. She seemed to leave her leaden feet behind on the ground when she mounted a broom. In the air she was as graceful as a phoenix and as intense as a hawk.
“Have you seen the fixture list yet?” she asked.
“Uh-huh, Oliver showed it to me last night. Make sure you have a good Christmas,” he warned.
“Why?” she asked.
"Because your New Year’s gonna be grim. January the sixth is when Gryffindor are going to kick your Hufflepuff butts!”
She snorted, “You wish, Weasley.”
“You promised to call me Charlie, remember,” he said.
“Sorry, Charlie,” she muttered.
They had entered the grounds of Hogwarts now and Charlie wondered how much longer he had alone with her. He slowed his pace and pulled her back into him.
“Where do you want to drink these?” he asked “We could always skip the Halloween feast and go to Hagrid’s garden,” he whispered as he nuzzled her ear.
She pushed him away gently. “Charlie, you agreed, slowly. Besides, I’m starving.”
“Tomorrow then,” he said. “Can we do something tomorrow?”
“Oh, I’m...uh...busy tomorrow,” she muttered.
“Busy with what?” he questioned.
“I’m brewing something?” she whispered.
“I’ll help you,” he offered.
“Better you don’t, Charlie,” she said. “It’s complicated and you’d only distract me.”
Then after giving him a quick peck on the cheek she stepped away again and began to walk up the front path.
“You still haven’t told me what you’re up to,” he shouted after her.
She stopped; already her hair was turning back to its customary pink spikes. She looked flustered and he knew that when she was flustered it showed in her hair, so he walked after her and pulled her round to face him.
“Tell me what’s going on, Tonks,” he whispered then he stopped. The tips of her hair were turning black. He let go. “Oh!” he said in shock. “It’s to do with him, isn’t it? Sirius Black.”
She nodded. Sirius Black was a subject that came up sporadically between them. When she’d first come to Hogwarts she’d been aware that her mother’s family were hated and feared. Her mother had told her to keep quiet about the connection and to this day Andromeda denied her daughter had ever met Sirius. Tonks had gone along with this, eager to stop her mother’s tears, but Charlie knew she’d met him and knew he was important to her. He did not believe in Black’s innocence anymore than the rest of the wizarding population. He had lost two uncles to the Death Eaters and as far as he was concerned they could all rot in Azkaban.
Tonks bit her lip as she tossed things over in her mind. Charlie was her friend; she could trust him.
“Let’s go to Hagrid’s and I’ll tell you everything,” she said decisively.
Hagrid, as Charlie knew, wasn’t there. It was nearly nightfall so he would be feeding Thestrals or checking on the unicorns. Charlie led her down to the pumpkin patch and pulled her to the ground. He opened two of the Butterbeers and handed one to her.
“Your cousin, then?” he said after a while.
“I’ve told you, haven’t I, that I once spent a day with him?” she began.
Charlie nodded.
“It was the only time I saw him. After that things suddenly got harder. He was working for the Order, James and Lily went into hiding and I must have been very low on his priority list. He wrote to me, sometimes, but I wasn’t allowed to write back in case they discovered his whereabouts. Our house was watched by Death Eaters and the Ministry alike. My mum, being a Black and married to a Muggle-born, wasn’t deemed trustworthy by either side.”
She sounded close to tears and hurriedly blew her nose on his proffered handkerchief.
“He wrote to me about his friends, his time at Hogwarts, about James, Lily and their new baby. Godric, he was proud to be Godfather. He talked so much about Harry “ I got quite jealous!”
“A few letters doesn’t change what he did, Tonks,” said Charlie quietly.
She rounded on him. “I thought you were on my side?”
“Always, Tonks, I’m just not on his.”
“It’s the same thing,” she sniffed.
“Carry on,” he said sighing.
“There were six of us at his flat that day; me, Sirius, Lily, James, Peter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin."
Charlie nodded again. He recognised Pettigrew’s name-Black’s last victim.
“Lily, James and Peter are dead. Sirius is locked up so that leaves Remus Lupin,” she muttered.
“What about him?” asked Charlie.
“I’ve found out someone in that group had turned traitor long before Pettigrew was killed,” she said.
“How do you know that?” he asked in amazement.
“Mum told me. She hadn’t wanted to accept his guilt either so she confronted Professor Dumbledore. He told her about his suspicion that someone in that group was passing information to You-Know-Who.”
“Tonks, Black was seen destroying a street full of Muggles and pulverising Peter Pettigrew,” Charlie said in exasperation. “That only confirms that Dumbledore was right.”
She got up and clenched her hands together. “What if it wasn’t him? What if there was another wizard-or witch- who killed Pettigrew and framed Sirius?”
Charlie looked at her, truly wondering if she’d gone mad. He stood up and took her face gently in his hands. “Don’t you think the Ministry would have found that person by now?”
She wrenched his hands away from her. “They never looked!”
“And why was that, Tonks? Tell me why?” His voice began to get louder as he tried to impress the truth upon her.
“They never looked,” she repeated stubbornly.
“No, Tonks. It was because they knew it was him. Sirius Black murdered Peter Pettigrew and all those Muggles,” he shouted. “You have to accept that.”
“I can’t! Sirius would not have betrayed any of his friends,” she yelled back at him.
Charlie sighed then pulled her back to the ground. They sat together for what seemed forever. The distance between them had never been this great.
“Tell me your plan, Tonks,” said Charlie at last.
Tentatively she reached out her hand and ran her fingers through his short shock of flame red hair then she leant in and put her head on his shoulder. She carried on the story whispering into his chest.
“The night I spent at Sirius’ flat he came in to check on me whilst I was in bed. I told him that I didn’t like one of his friends.”
“What, this Lupin guy? Is that what your theory’s based on, you at the age of six disliking someone? Godric, Tonks...”
“Hush, let me finish,” she looked up at him, calmer now she had his attention. “Actually it was Peter Pettigrew I didn’t like but Sirius assumed I meant Lupin.”
“So what?” Charlie was beginning to feel angry again.
“Oh, Weasley, don’t be thick. Plainly Sirius didn’t trust Lupin quite as much as he did the others,” she said scornfully.
“Where are you going with this, Tonks?” he sighed.
She took a deep breath.
“I’ve found Lupin. I saw him going into a bar in Knockturn Alley in the summer and I’m going to go and uh...talk to him,” she said shiftily.
“Why on earth would he tell you anything?” asked Charlie then he stopped as realisation dawned on his face. “Cockroach wings, Hippogriff feathers, Newt Powder and Flobberworm juice,” he said as he ticked them off on his fingers. “You’ve stolen the ingredients for Veritaserum haven’t you?”
“Yes!” she said defiantly.
He swore violently. “I did not want to know that. It’s a controlled substance, Tonks!”
“If I can get the truth out of Lupin then Sirius is free,” she said imploringly.
There was another long pause as he looked at her face shining with excitement. He knew this whole plan was madness. He knew that if they were caught it could mean at best the loss of his Prefect status and at worst expulsion but he also knew how much this meant to her. Lastly, he hoped that, despite her aptitude for Potions, this brew would be beyond her.
“Tell me how I can help you?” he said resignedly.
***
It was Charlie who found her somewhere to brew the potion. Despite his misgivings, he told her about a small hut on the edge of the forest that was deserted. It had belonged to Ogg the former Groundskeeper.
Veritaserum, Tonks told Charlie, took a lunar month to brew and she wanted it ready for the Christmas holidays when she should be able to escape to London to find Lupin. In her spare moments for the next two weeks she read over the recipe again and again. It was demanding and would take all her nerve and concentration but she knew she was capable. In Potions, as in flying, Tonks seemed to lose her carelessness. Although she’d sometimes trip and drop her finished result she had learned to brew enough for a second attempt. Snape was surprisingly indulgent with her as she was one student who really did put in the extra time.
By mid November, Tonks was sure she was ready to start. So, one Saturday at five in the morning, she lugged everything down to the hut. She started to prepare by shredding the Hippogriff feather with her silver knife. Three hours later, Charlie found her surrounded by ingredients. Her face was smudged; her fingers filthy but she had a huge smile on her face.
“Wotcher, Weasley!” she said cheerfully. “What’s the story?”
“I was looking for you, Tonks. I thought you weren’t going to start without me,” he said complaining slightly.
“Ooops! Sorry, I got carried away and this first bit’s easier than I thought,” she replied, still grinning up at him.
“Are you coming for breakfast?” he asked.
“Err...yeah,” she replied. “Why not?”
She stood up carefully, unwilling to spill anything into the rapidly bubbling cauldron. She gently reduced the blue flames underneath to a slow simmer then, brushing some mud off her skirt, she followed him to breakfast.
“Weasley,” bellowed Wood as they entered the Great Hall. “You should have been here for breakfast fifteen minutes ago.”
Charlie groaned and wondered, for what felt like the fiftieth time, exactly why he’d decided to give up the captaincy. He’d thought life would be a lot less hassle without the badge but Wood was taking his role very seriously. He saw Fred and George, the new Beaters, smirking at him. The mud on Tonks’ skirt had not escaped their attention.
“You’ll be at the match, I hope,” Charlie said to her.
“Of course,” she replied.
“No sneaking back to the hut,” he added.
She looked him straight in the eye. “Today I’m going to be focused on my favourite Seeker and that’s all.”
He smiled warmly as she pecked him on the cheek and then went to join his team.
Buoyed up by her support, Charlie caught the Snitch very early on in the game. Gryffindor recorded their quickest win in over fifty years and he was carried to his Common Room by the team. Not for the first time he cursed the day the Sorting Hat had divided him and Tonks. She was not invited to the party that followed despite now being his official girlfriend and his brothers would not let him sneak out to find her. Tonks hung around for a while in the Great Hall and by the lake but in the end the pull of the Veritaserum that she’d left bubbling proved too strong.
“It’s going well, so far, Sirius,” she whispered. “Remus Lupin’s days are numbered.”
***
Over the next month by cutting back on sleep and skipping meal times, Tonks managed to visit her potion every day. It had proved easier to brew than she’d imagined and by the end of the four weeks she had her colourless, odourless potion. There was only a small amount as she’d had to evaporate it down to a syrupy consistency, then in her excitement her nerves had overcome her and she’d spilt some on the floor but she’d managed to make enough to pour into a small vial. It was Saturday the twelfth of December when she ran up the stairs to the Gryffindor Tower.
“You’re not a Gryffindor!” said the Fat Lady imperiously. “I cannot let you in without the password.”
“Oh, please, I need to see Charlie Weasley- immediately,” she begged.
“It’s six thirty in the morning, he’s probably asleep,” snapped the Fat Lady.
“No he’s not,” said a tired voice from behind them. It was Charlie. “Oliver called another early practise. Good morning,” he said to Tonks as he kissed her. “Come to wish me a happy birthday.”
Her face fell. “Merlin, I’m sorry, Charlie. I forgot,” she said in horror. “Look I do have something for you but I’ve left it in my room.”
“That’s okay,” he said sighing. “What are you doing here, then?”
Her face lit up with excitement. “It’s ready, Charlie. I’ve made it.”
He looked at her hopping from foot to foot like a child; her hair switching to different shades of pink. Charlie wondered how much longer he could go on in a relationship so one-sided. He had hoped by now she’d be more committed but, apart from a few kisses, she still treated him firmly as a friend.
“Look, sweetheart, I’m pretty hot and sweaty here, so why don’t I see you after breakfast? Perhaps we can spend the day together, or something?” he suggested.
She agreed willingly and before he got to the Portrait hole she threw her arms around him. “Happy Birthday, Charlie,” she said as she kissed him before running off. Charlie watched her go, thinking that perhaps his eighteenth birthday would be memorable after all.
They met after breakfast in the Great Hall. Tonks handed over his gift. Despite her distraction with the potion she had really thought about what Charlie would like. She was always good with gifts and this year was no exception. Charlie found himself the proud owner of a limited edition Newt Scamander book entitled 'Dragonapedia- Everything you always wanted to know but were too afraid of the burns to ask!'
She’d also made him some replica Snitches out of honeycomb which she’d charmed to fly into his mouth.
“This is fantastic, Tonks,” he said. “When did you get the time?”
“I spent so much time in that shed watching the potion I needed something to keep me amused,” she replied.
“So,” he said finally, as he took her hand and walked to the lake, “Where’s the potion?”
She pulled a small glass bottle out of her pocket and waved it in front of him. “I need to see if it works -- do you fancy being a guinea pig?”
“No, I flaming well do not, Nymphadora!” he said in exasperation.
“Okay, Weasley, keep your hair on. I wouldn’t make you drink it anyway. You can test it on me!”
She uncorked it and, without thinking, dipped her finger in the liquid. “Go on Charlie, ask me anything,” she dared him then licked her fingertip. He could see she was still aware of him but something from her eyes was missing.
“What’s your favourite hair colour?”
“Pink,” she answered promptly, grinning.
Who’s your favourite Professor?” he asked knowing she always said McGonagall.
“Snape,” she replied. Her eyes widened “ she knew what she’d said but was apparently surprised.
“Who’s your favourite Seeker, Tonks?” he asked gently, praying for the right answer.
“Charlie Weasley,” she answered; she looked relieved.
He could see her eyes beginning to unfog, so quickly asked his last question.
“How do you really feel about me, Tonks? Do you love me?” he whispered.
“You’re my best friend. I love you like a brother.”
He looked into her eyes- they were fearful for she had not wanted to say those words, perhaps she’d never known what she felt for him or perhaps he’d always been kidding himself that they could ever be more than friends.
“Charlie,” she whispered, her voice back to normal. “I’m sorry. Perhaps I just need more time.”
“Just go, Tonks,” he said bitterly. “Go and find out what everyone else knows about your precious cousin then maybe you’ll be able to look at me.”
“It’s not about Sirius,” she said beseechingly as she put her arm over his shoulders.
He shrugged her off wanting her to go but she stayed where she was.
“My mum,” she continued after a while, “always said she knew that Dad was the one for her because he made her heart sing. I’ve never felt that way about anyone, Charlie.”
“Not even Sirius Black?” he said sarcastically.
She took his hands in hers. “Not even Sirius,” she confirmed.
“Then give this up, Tonks,” he pleaded. “Accept he’s guilty, before it drives you insane.”
“I can’t,” she said sadly. “Sorry, Charlie, I should never have involved you in any of this.” She wrapped her arms round him and gave him a kiss on the lips, he ached to respond but knowing she didn’t feel the same way made him freeze.
“Leave it, Tonks,” he ordered. He stood up and brushed the honeycomb Snitch crumbs off from his jumper. “See you around… maybe,” he said coldly.
“Don’t forget the book, Charlie,” she cried.
“Keep it or return it, Tonks,” he said. “I don’t want it now.”
She watched him trudge back to the castle. She thought about following him to tell him he was mistaken, that the Veritaserum must have made her lie but she knew it hadn’t. So instead she turned away and walked towards Hogsmeade.
***
Remus Lupin woke up on the thirteenth December in his cellar. His clothes were ripped, the old shirt he’d been wearing hung off his thin frame. There was blood on his face and arms where he’d bitten and scratched to get out. His whole body was wracked with pain and his mouth was bleeding copiously. Slowly, he began to slide open the seven bolts on the door. He could see one had been almost destroyed which accounted for the state of his lips. There was some daylight shining through his window, but it was still dark in his room. He lived in a basement flat in London. It had been bought by his parents specifically because it had a secure cellar underneath and was close enough to Diagon Alley for him to find work. He could hear rain drumming on the pavement outside.
He checked the clock. It was five thirty on a Sunday morning so most Muggles would still be in bed. He removed his shirt and opened his front door intending to let the cold rain soothe his ravaged skin. Then he stopped. Huddled in a corner by his front door was what looked like a girl. Remus was used to homeless people sleeping rough in London, but he’d never seen one who’d conjured blue flames to keep themselves warm as they slept.
He bent down and gently shook her awake. “Can I help you?” he asked.
Tonks started for there in front of her was the man she’d spent all day and night looking for. He was older than she remembered and his hair was already turning grey. In fact it was hard to believe he was only thirty. He looked gaunt and the blood on his face and chest made it difficult for her not to recoil. Aware of her scrutiny he hurriedly put the torn shirt back on, but it was so bloodstained that it made little difference to the horror of his appearance.
“I’m looking for Remus Lupin,” she said as she pulled herself up to standing.
“You’ve found him,” he replied simply.
Tonks grasped her wand firmly beneath her cloak. “I believe you knew my cousin, Sirius Black,” she said quickly. “I met you, once, about eleven years ago.”
If it were possible to look any paler than he already did then Remus Lupin would have blanched at this point. He remembered that evening as if it were yesterday. It was one of the last evenings the friends had spent together and, of course, it was the night he found out Lily was pregnant. The memory of that evening had kept him going through many a dark day; James, Lily and Peter had still been alive and Sirius was not in league with Voldemort. He smiled at Tonks his eyes warming to the memory of her pink hair and Sirius’ delight in her.
“You’re Nymphadora Tonks, aren’t you?” he said.
“Just Tonks,” she replied brusquely. She was thrown by his appearance and the compassion she could see in his eyes. “Can I come in?” she asked.
He opened the door fully and ushered her into his tiny one roomed flat. He flicked his wand quickly as he attempted to clear the rubbish from a shabby looking sofa.
“Sorry, I don’t get many visitors,” he said in embarrassment.
She took a seat, watching him the whole time. This was not how she imagined her cousin’s betrayer. She’d expected him to be arrogant, wealthy and living somewhere much better than this flea-pit. People like her Aunt Narcissa lived well, despite being in league with You-know-Who, so why was Lupin living in such a decrepit area?
“I take it you want to talk about Black?” he said after a while.
“Oh...err...yeah, if you wouldn’t mind,” she said looking at the ground as she spoke. She noticed his bare feet on the wooden boards- ‘Was there any part of his body not covered with cuts?’ she wondered then blushed- she shouldn’t be thinking about his body.
“I don’t really think I have much to add on the subject of Sirius that’s not already known,” he replied.
She sighed. She’d rehearsed this bit again and again in her head but still felt uncomfortable. She leant forward and touched his arm then looked at his face and smiled, dolefully.
“I was rather hoping you could tell me why you think he did all those terrible things?” she said, in what she hoped was a convincing manner.
Remus flinched away from the unexpected contact. He didn’t quite trust her motives; there was something about the blue tinge to her hair than smacked of deceit.
“Are you a journalist now, Nymphadora?” he asked suddenly. “You want the dirt on Sirius Black after all these years so you thought you’d come to his last remaining school friend.” He stood up. “I think you should leave. I have nothing to say to you.”
“Oh, please,” she begged and pulled on his arm. “I’m not a journalist, I’m still at Hogwarts. I just want to talk to someone about him and I remembered how kind you were that evening.”
“Hogwarts term’s ended early this year, then?” he said in disbelief.
“No,” she admitted. “I’ve bunked off. At this moment I should be in my Common Room starting a convoluted essay on Human Transfiguration for Professor McGonagall but this suddenly seemed more important.”
“A reckless, impulsive Gryffindor -- just like him,” muttered Remus.
“No,” she replied. “I’m a Hufflepuff! Please will you talk to me? Tell me why you think he betrayed James and Lily?”
“Okay,” he sighed.
Tonks relaxed, it would be plain sailing now. “Could I possibly have a drink first?” she asked.
She noticed how his eyes seemed to brighten and yellow flecks appeared when he smiled.
He went over to the corner of the room where he had a one ring stove and a cupboard and returned with two glasses of pumpkin juice. Aware she was looking at him, he suddenly realised how inadequately dressed he was.
“I must put something on,” he said, turning his back on her to pull on a long shabby cloak.
Quick as a flash she pulled out her vial of Veritaserum and began to add it to his glass but just as she was re-stopping the vial he grabbed her wrist.
“What in the name of Salazar are you up to?” he whispered quietly but there was no mistaking the anger in his voice.
Memories and Revelations by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Desperate for the truth about her cousin, Sirius Black, Tonks has tracked down the last Marauder. He will tell her the truth even if she has to use nefarious means. She knows he holds the key to Sirius’ fate but what she hasn’t counted on is Remus Lupin’s compelling honesty.
Thanks as ever to the wonderful Terri (mudbloodproud)
“Ow! You’re hurting me,” she cried. “Please, it’s nothing.”
He grabbed the vial from her hand and sniffed at it, “Veritaserum! Very clever, Nymphadora. What are you after if you’re not a journalist? Some filthy little secret from my past “ or Black’s “ to sell to The Prophet?”
“No, please, please you’ve got it all wrong.” She wrenched her hand away and pushed him back. Weakened from the night before, he stumbled backwards onto the floor sending the vial flying. It landed on the bare boards and smashed. The pain in his body increased tenfold and she could see blood oozing through the ripped shirt as his wounds re-opened.
For some reason, she had no idea why, she stayed and didn’t run whilst she had the chance.
“What do you want then?” he asked warily.
“The truth about that day,” she replied tearfully.
“Which day?” he said, sounding exhausted.
“The day Sirius supposedly killed Peter Pettigrew and all those Muggles.”
“Supposedly,” he exclaimed angrily. “Black did it. Peter cornered him and tried to duel him. Godric knows why! Sirius was the best dueller in our school; Peter didn’t stand a chance.”
“No!” she cried forcefully. “Why would he do that? What reason did he have for murdering Peter?”
“He sold out James and Lily. He switched sides and it led to the murder of the best and most loyal friend we ever had and the kindest, most vibrant girl I’ve ever met.”
His emotions were getting the better of him. He stood up, wearily, and looked at the two glasses of Pumpkin Juice on the table.
“What was your plan then?” he asked quietly.
“It doesn’t matter,” she mumbled.
He looked at the broken vial as he sat back on the sofa. “Clearly you wanted to ask me something and you weren’t sure I’d tell you the truth. You do know, you’ve stolen a controlled substance.”
“I didn’t steal it. I made it “ there’s a difference,” she said mutinously.
“That’s a moot point,” he said, smiling slightly and then he gasped. “You think I did it, don’t you?”
She looked at him and nodded.
“And you’ve come all this way to confront a ‘Dark Wizard’. Godric, you may be a Hufflepuff but you’re as reckless as Sirius,” he said, then he laughed, a touch bitterly. “Go on then, ask away. I’m far too weak this morning to resist.” He reached for his Pumpkin Juice and took a sip.
She knew instantly that the Veritaserum was working and he wasn’t using anything to counter the effects. There was a dullness in his eyes although he still watched her carefully.
She stared at him, took a deep breath and began asking the questions that had haunted her ever since Sirius had been locked away.
“Did you kill Peter Pettigrew?”
“No.”
She faltered.
“Did you frame Sirius Black?”
“No,” he answered.
“But you know who did?” she asked desperately.
“No one framed him,” he said.
She knew time was running out.
“Who betrayed James and Lily Potter?”
“Sirius Black.” He spoke the words that sounded a death knell on her hopes, in a voice that was deathly calm.
“No!” she screamed hysterically. “That’s not what happened. That can’t be the way it happened.”
She was getting nowhere. She’d risked her future and lost her friendship with Charlie for nothing. Was she imagining the sadness in Remus’ eyes? Desperately, she tried one last question.
“Do you truly believe that your friend, Padfoot, betrayed and murdered his friends?”
“No, Padfoot would never have done that,” said Remus with quiet certainty. Like Tonks, the previous day, his eyes widened in surprise at the truth he’d uttered.
There was silence. Tonks watched as his eyes came back to life. He sat up and put his head in his hands.
“You don’t think he did it either, do you, Moony?” she whispered.
He jerked at her use of his nickname and looked at her. She was smiling, a wide smile and he was suddenly reminded of that six year old girl who’d lain on Sirius’ chest wearing his Gryffindor t-shirt.
“You think he’s innocent too,” she said happily. She stood up and began to dance around the room. “You can help me.”
He reached out and grabbed her hand as she waltzed past and pulled her back to the sofa. He gazed into her dark eyes alive with hope and optimism. He didn’t want to see that light die but he knew he must speak.
“I don’t want to believe he did it,” he said gently, “but I know he did. There were too many witnesses to his attack, plus he was James and Lily’s Secret Keeper. Only he could have told Voldemort where they were. Professor Dumbledore attested to this.”
“Dumbledore,” she said faintly. He looked at her in alarm seeing a whole new train of thought opening up in her mind.
“You can’t possibly suspect Dumbledore, that really is crazy,” he said seriously.
She shook herself out of her reverie. “Yeah, I know,” she sniffed. “Sorry I tried to ambush you like that. I’ll go now and leave you in peace.”
“Hold on,” he said. He looked down and frowned at the bruise darkening on her slight wrist where he’d grabbed her earlier in anger. “You wanted to ask me something else, I think.” He picked up the Pumpkin juice but she stayed his hand.
“I don’t think that’s necessary,” she said quietly. “I don’t believe you did it either.”
He looked at her intently; his eyes glowing through the yellow flecks surrounding his pupils.
“Your last question, go on.”
She leant back on the sofa and took a deep breath. “That night I spent at Sirius’ flat, I told him I didn’t like one of his friends and...”
“It was me?” he interrupted. “And there was me thinking I was good with kids!”
“No, it was Peter. I thought you seemed sad, that’s all. Oh, and that you had a stupid nickname,” she laughed at the memory, then continued, “but Sirius assumed I meant you and I don’t know why. I don’t understand why he didn’t trust you.”
Remus cast his eyes to the ceiling. In a strange way he was enjoying this interrogation with her. It was taking his mind off the pain and the knowledge that he’d lost another grotty job. He’d have liked her to stick around for a bit but knew she’d leave very soon.
“I’m a werewolf,” he said simply.
“Pardon?” she said, shaking her head as if she had water in her ears.
“You heard right, Nymphadora. I’m a werewolf and have been since I was six years old.”
“And Sirius knew this?” she asked.
“Oh yes. He, James and Peter figured it out in our second year.”
Another memory. “So you’re not a huge hit on the dance floor,” she said giggling.
He smiled sardonically. “Padfoot’s idea of a joke!”
She became serious. “All those cuts on you, is that what happens when you become one of them...a werewolf?” She gagged on the word.
“Only if I’m confined,” he replied. “If I were to roam free then I’d bite and claw people instead of myself.”
“Godric, that’s awful,” she said, her eyes swimming with tears.
Remus was confused. She hadn’t left. She hadn’t shown fear like the occasional girlfriends who’d run a mile once they’d found out his secret. She’d stayed where she was, right next to him, and sounded genuinely sympathetic. She reminded him of Lily.
“Do you ever take Wolfsbane?” she asked suddenly.
He laughed bitterly. “It’s very expensive and as I can’t hold onto a job for longer than a few weeks, it’s a luxury I can’t afford.”
She sipped her Pumpkin Juice, thoughtfully. He began to clear away his cup and the smashed vial. She offered him some of her juice and he took a gulp. She noticed that his gaping shirt was now far more red than white.
“Those bites look sore,” she said.
“Mmm, I have some salve; I’ll apply it in a while,” he muttered.
“Don’t let me stop you,” she said. She grinned at him trying to lighten the mood and take away his obvious discomfort. “I’m the only girl on my Quidditch team. I’m used to seeing boys with their shirts off.”
“I’m fine, I’ll do it later,” he said bluntly, but he winced again as he sat down.
“This is stupid,” she said. “Come on, take the shirt off or lift it up and I’ll help you. Where’s the salve?”
“Over there,” he said pointing to the mantelpiece. “But please don’t bother.”
“No trouble,” she said. She tripped as she walked back and nearly fell on him. He caught her by the waist and she landed on the sofa next to him, half on his lap. “Sorry. I’m really clumsy,” she mumbled as she moved back to the edge of the sofa. She handed him the jar which was nearly empty. He rubbed some into his fingers and began to apply it to his face and arms. They began to heal almost immediately.
“That’s not where it really hurts, is it?” she said shrewdly. “I can see that huge welt on your back. Come here.” She gently removed his shirt from over his head. Remus didn’t know where to look so just closed his eyes. For once he didn’t feel ashamed, just a little embarrassed. She had a knack of making this feel normal. She spread some of the mixture on his back; he winced. “Sorry, am I hurting you?” she said quietly.
“Your hands are cold, that’s all,” he replied, his voice little more than a whisper. She stopped and he could hear her warming her hands before she returned to his back. The pain began to leave his body under her touch. He felt as if he was drowning under her soft caress.
‘Oh, Godric,’ he thought. ‘This is too much to bear.’
“Thank you,” he managed to say even though his throat felt as if it were constricting. He felt old and weary and she, he calculated, could only be seventeen. He longed to be young again, to be whole. He stood up and dug out a very crumpled but at least intact shirt to wear and hurriedly pulled it on.
Tonks was sniffing the salve and rubbing it between her fingers. “I could make this for you, if you’d like. It’s quite an easy formula and Professor Snape wouldn’t mind.”
“Snape,” he said, her words whiplashed him back. “Do you mean Severus Snape?”
“Err, yeah. He’s my Potions Master. He’s very good.”
“Mmm, I’m sure he is,” replied Remus. The mention of his old enemy had rapidly cleared his mind. “Don’t you need to get back to school?”
“Oh yes, I suppose so,” she sounded reluctant; returning to school meant facing Charlie. “I’m starving though. I don’t suppose there’s any chance of some breakfast before I leave?” she said cheekily.
He grinned at her. “Despite my obvious penury, I do have some food in the house and it needs eating up. How about bacon and eggs?”
“Bleugh- not eggs. I hate them!” she replied.
He clattered around in his small kitchen corner preparing bacon sandwiches for two. Then they sat back on the sofa with plates on their knees and talked companionably about Hogwarts and Quidditch, never mentioning the one person they had in common. The sexual tension Remus had felt before seemed to have diminished.
“How did you find me?” he asked at one point.
“Oh,” she said swallowing quickly, “that was quite easy. I saw you going into a pub in Knockturn Alley during the summer holidays.”
“What were you doing in Knockturn Alley?” he said disapprovingly.
She grinned. “I was practising shadowing people, if you must know. I want to be an Auror and Knockturn Alley always has lots of weird and suspicious people hanging around.”
He grimaced. “Okay, so you saw a weird and suspicious Remus Lupin go into a pub, then what?”
“I went back there yesterday and found out you used to work there. They gave me your address,” she said.
He was suddenly angry again. “You went into that place...a young girl… alone? Do you have a death wish or something?” He couldn’t understand why she was smiling.
“It’s been a good few years since you last saw me, Remus, but I’m pretty good at controlling my appearance now. Look!” She screwed up her face and he saw the pink hair lengthen to grey wisps and warts appear on the wrinkled face of a hag.
“Amazing,” he breathed, “but still bloody dangerous, Nymphadora.”
She shrugged. “Call me Tonks. I hate Nymphadora.”
They finished their food and she took the plates to his tiny sink. Remus checked his watch- it was seven o’clock.
“I think you need to get back to Hogwarts,” he said.
“Mmm,” she agreed fretfully, “I’m not sure how I’m going to sneak back in. If only I could Apparate directly into my dorm.”
He laughed and she noticed a mischievous glint in his eyes.
“Don’t worry about that, Tonks. I know a way in.”
***
They arrived back in Hogsmeade shortly after seven thirty. Tonks was surprised to find they were behind Honeydukes.
“Why are we here?” she hissed. “Am I supposed to hide in a box of Cockroach Clusters and wait to be delivered or something?”
“Hush,” he said. “I can hear someone.”
“So how long has the wretched girl been missing, Pomona?” said the strident voice of Professor McGonagall.
Tonks gasped; this could mean trouble.
“Well her bed’s not been slept in and the last time her room mates saw her was early yesterday morning when she set off to see Charlie Weasley. Apparently they were going to spend the day together as it was his birthday,” said Professor Sprout, the Hufflepuff Head of House.
“He’s being very cagey about the whole thing,” replied Professor McGonagall. “I expect we’ll find it’s just a lover’s quarrel about nothing important. Quite why she’d run off though, I’ve no idea.”
“Teenagers, eh?” said Professor Sprout. “I think we should talk to him again when we get back. I’m sure he knows something.”
“Who’s this Charlie Weasel they keep talking about?” whispered Remus.
“Weasley,” she corrected. “Charlie Weasley, he’s...err...um... well he’s a friend but sort of a boyfriend...well an ex I suppose.” She blushed.
“And he knows you came to see me?” he asked.
“Not exactly,” she replied. “He knows I was going to visit you during the holidays and he...err...helped me steal the Veritaserum ingredients but he doesn’t know I went to see you yesterday.”
“But he can tell them of your intentions, yes?” he asked urgently.
She nodded. He drew in his breath sharply and thought for a minute or two.
“Okay, here’s what you do,” he said at last. “I’m going to show you a secret passageway from Honeyduke’s cellar that will lead directly to Hogwarts. Go through it as quick as you can. It takes about an hour. You’ll come out through the statue of the one-eyed-witch on the third corridor “ you know where I mean?” She nodded.
“From there, I think your best bet is to go to the library and find a table in the restricted section. You could pretend you fell asleep over that Transfiguration essay you were talking about earlier.”
“That’s brilliant,” she said in awe. “How did you think of that?”
“That’s nothing! I shared a room with James Potter and Sirius Black for seven years. The number of times Sirius snuck back late after meeting Rosmerta after hours...” he stopped, thinking the conversation wasn’t really appropriate.
“What about Charlie though?” she said. “What if they question him? I don’t want to get him into trouble.”
“Can you get a message to him?” asked Remus.
“I can try but he’s in Gryffindor and the Fat Lady will never let me through without a password.”
He grinned suddenly. “A Gryffindor, eh? Well as it’s December I bet her password’s ‘Fairy Lights’- it always was in our day.”
He turned to the trap door in the ground that led to Honeydukes cellar.
“This lock is a bit tricky. It won’t open with Alohamora. We need a bit of Muggle trickery.” He produced a thin key and began wiggling it in the lock. “Skeleton key,” he said. “James taught us all how to use these in our third year,” he whispered and began working the lock. After five minutes the trapdoor opened. He jumped inside.
“Come on,” he said. “I’ll catch you.”
He felt excited. This was the most fun he’d had in years and he relished the chance to relive his Marauder days. He led her over to some floorboards then bent down and started to clear the dust away.
“Here, Tonks,” he said. “The entrance is here. Go quickly and remember, ‘Fairy Lights’.”
She looked at him. The scars on his face had disappeared beneath the wide smile. She started towards the trap door then turned back. Impulsively, she hugged him.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” she whispered breathlessly, “For all your help. I’m so sorry I’ve put you to all this trouble.”
He laughed. “This isn’t trouble, Tonks. Trouble was James and Sirius trying to break into the girl’s dorms. Trouble was James hexing Sev...err... a Slytherin to impress Lily Evans and failing miserably. Trouble was...” he stopped and his face dropped as he remembered what had happened to his friends.
“He didn’t do it, Moony,” she said. “You don’t believe it either.”
He looked down at her face, so impassioned, so sure she was right. Suddenly, instinctively, he bent his head down and kissed her on the lips. The instant she responded, he broke away and pushed her aside.
“Godric, I’m sorry, Tonks,” he spluttered. “I don’t know what came over me...stupid mistake...”
She placed a finger on his lips. “Hush,” she said as she tilted her head towards his. She kissed him again then reluctantly turned away and jumped into the tunnel. “I’ll get him out, Moony. I swear to that.”
Remus watched her disappear along the tunnel. Sirius Black’s cousin - he should have known that little six year old would grow up to be a formidable advocate.
***
Quickly she covered the ground in the tunnel, occasionally slipping on what appeared to be recent Dungbombs and half eaten Cauldron Cakes. She wondered who else in Hogwarts knew about the passage. Remus had said it would take about an hour but she walked as fast as she could and it was a quarter past eight when she reached the statue of the one-eyed witch. She could hear voices outside the passageway, students off to breakfast no doubt.
Hastily, she changed her hair to a non-descript brown, sharpened her facial features and ran towards Gryffindor Tower. The Fat Lady didn’t recognise her, but was never at her best in the morning, so on the utterance of the password she let the portrait door swing open.
Tonks looked around the Common Room. It wasn’t the first time she’d been in as Charlie had brought her here once before in their first year. She was amazed to see a notice board pinned full of pictures of him “ their star Seeker.
Above, she could see a faded picture of a former Gryffindor team. She looked closer and gasped for there was James Potter looking at her. Next to it was a picture of him and Lily. Both were wearing their Head Boy and Head Girl badges, although she noticed with a wry smile that James’ badge was grubby whilst Lily’s sparkled. James had his arm around her waist and kept trying to kiss her.
One side of the photo had been torn off but Tonks could see James and Lily laughing with a third person whose arm was also around Lily. Lily’s smile was so bright that Tonks felt as if she were in the room with her. She touched Lily’s face. “I wish I could see you again,” she sighed. “You’d tell me what to do.”
She heard some solitary footsteps thudding down the stairs, it was Charlie. He looked awful, clearly he hadn’t slept well.
“Charlie,” she said urgently.
He stopped at the bottom step and watched as she changed her face back. She noticed he was carrying a large book.
“Tonks, where the hell have you been?” he said angrily. “McGonagall and Sprout have been doing their nut trying to find you.”
“Charlie, it’s okay. I’m back now. I just needed some time to think,” she said. “Look, I’m going to go to the library now and I’ll pretend to be asleep. I just didn’t want you to worry or...” she stopped.
“You’re not going to tell me where you were, are you,” he said bitterly. “I was worried sick about you. I came back, you know. You’d left the book and I could see you running off.”
She recognised the Dragonapedia she’d given him the day before. 'Merlin,' she thought. 'Was that really only yesterday?'
“I was thinking things out, that’s all,” she said, suddenly reticent. “And I lost track of time, okay?”
He glared at her still feeling hurt that she didn’t return his feelings.
“I’m going now, Charlie. Please don’t say anything to McGonagall,” she said beseechingly.
He nodded briefly and watched her walk out the door.
Resuming her former disguise she ran to the library and sneaked past Madame Pince who was just starting to unlock the doors. She headed straight for the Restricted section, like Remus had told her to, and pulled out as many Transfiguration books as she could. Then she laid her head down on the desk and pretended to sleep. She relaxed and her breathing became slower, more measured.
Then she remembered Remus’ kiss and a smile crept over her face. It was hard to pretend to be asleep when her thoughts were so distracting. The short mousy hair barely covered her cheeks so she screwed up her face and began to lengthen it until it swung down to her shoulders. At the back of her mind there lay a memory which had been awakened by that picture in the Gryffindor Common Room. Her hair became dark red.
“Still no sign, Minerva?” said Madame Pince.
“None at all, Irma,” replied Professor McGonagall. “Are you quite sure she’s not in the library?”
“Diligent though she is, I hardly think Nymphadora Tonks would spend the night in the library because of a lover’s tiff,” said a male voice.
Tonks shut her eyes tighter as she recognised the sarcastic, clipped tones of Professor Snape.
He sighed, “I’ll look in here, Minerva. Why don’t you question the Weasley boy again? He’s probably got something to do with it.”
Tonks heard Professor McGonagall walk away. She felt her heart thumping in her chest and carefully adjusted her hair so that no part of her blushing face could betray her. She could hear his footsteps getting closer and closer as he walked through the aisles. Then suddenly they stopped. She heard a loud gasp coming from his lips and decided that perhaps it was a sound loud enough to wake her, so she lifted her head.
Professor Snape was standing in front of her with a look of abject misery and horror on his face. His usual air of cynicism was gone. He had gripped a chair, his knuckles turning white with the pressure. A muffled sob and a word escaped from his lips but Tonks wasn’t sure what he’d said. She stretched her arms up and gave a big yawn.
“Goodness what time is it,” she said widening her eyes in an innocent manner. “Merlin, have I been here all night, Professor?”
Some colour had returned to his face and he unclenched his fingers.
“M-Miss Tonks,” he said shakily. “Are you aware that the whole school have been out looking for you? You weren’t seen for any meals and your bed wasn’t slept in.”
“Oh, I was in here, Professor, doing some research,” she replied.
“In disguise?” he said indicating her red hair.
She trailed her fingers through her hair and then smoothed it behind her ears. The gesture seemed to shock him she was intrigued to see.
“I didn’t want to be seen, sir,” she explained. “I didn’t want anyone to bother me.”
“Not even Mr Weasley?” he said, raising one eyebrow.
“Especially not Mr Weasley!” she said, trying to sound angry.
She began to pick up the books and return them to the shelves. She hoped fervently that he wouldn’t question her lack of a quill or parchment; fortunately he seemed distracted by something.
“Your hair, Miss Tonks,” he said at last.
“What’s wrong with it now?” she sighed.
His hand was moving towards her hair almost as if he wanted to touch it. Tonks was so surprised that she dropped the heaviest book on her foot.
“Flaming Phoenix!” she yelled and began to hop up and down holding her toes. “Merlin, that hurts!”
Her cursing snapped him out of his reverie. His hand whipped back to his side as Madame Pince approached puce in the face at the noise.
“It’s an improvement on pink,” he said. “Run along, Miss Tonks. I expect you’re hungry.”
“Oh, yes,” she said thinking about the bacon sandwiches she’d shared with Remus only two hours before. “I guess I must be.”
She limped to the door and apologised to Madame Pince then she turned back to look at Snape. He had an odd, almost wistful, look on his face and she had no idea why.
***
At breakfast she was greeted with whoops and cheers from the Hufflepuff table. Tonks had always been a popular member of school and the Hufflepuffs loved her for making them more noticeable. The Ravenclaws, too, greeted her warmly and there were even some Slytherins, noticeably the ones in her Potions class that waved as she started to sit down. From the Gryffindor table there was silence. Charlie was their star and Tonks had upset him. She stood on one of the chairs and turning to her fellow ‘Puffs changed her hair to canary yellow.
“That will do, Nymphadora!” said Professor Sprout. “You will come and see me immediately after breakfast.”
“Yes, Professor,” she said loudly and then sat down to eat.
“Where were you?” whispered Aggie. “I’ve been really worried ever since Charlie Weasley came round looking for you. He told us you’d broken up. I never dreamt you’d get this upset over a boy.”
“I wasn’t upset,” hissed Tonks. “Well, not really upset. We had a row and I wandered round for a bit and then decided to do that Transfiguration essay in the library.”
Aggie raised her eyebrows sceptically. “You mean that Transfiguration essay that’s screwed up under your bed with only the title written.”
“Trust you to find that,” grumbled Tonks. “Look, Aggie, I was found in the library with lots of Transfiguration books so can we drop it?”
“Okay,” said Aggie. “What happened with you and Charlie, though?”
“We broke up,” said Tonks.
“What just like that? And on his birthday. What happened? Has he got another girl or something?” interrogated Aggie.
“No, nothing like that. It was never going to work, okay? Charlie’s great but I was always better off being his friend.” She sighed. “Unfortunately, I think I’ve lost his friendship too.”
“He’ll come round, Tonks. Don’t worry,” reassured Aggie.
“I’m not so sure about that, he’s pretty hurt and did you see the looks the Gryffs gave me as I walked in “ not to mention his brothers,” she brooded.
After one small piece of toast, which she only ate to disguise the fact that she was full, Tonks left the Great Hall to speak to Professor Sprout. Charlie was watching her so she smiled and mouthed the words, “Thank you,” to him. He gave a half smile back and shrugged his shoulders. He was sitting next to his three brothers who all turned at the same time to see who Charlie was looking at. Percy, a year four student, gave her a disparaging look and returned to his porridge but Fred and George glowered at her as she walked off.
***
She knew Professor Sprout had been unconvinced by her story but unable to catch Tonks out in a lie she couldn’t punish her. She ended the interview by insinuating that Tonks’ end of term work had better be extraordinary given the amount of time she’d spent in the library. Tonks willed herself not to blush and left her Housemistress’ Office. She fell into her bed and tried to catch up on some sleep.
She woke at noon. It had not been a restful sleep, Remus Lupin had entered her dream and she’d been unable to dislodge the image of him kissing her. She needed to pull herself together. The past month she’d been so obsessed with the Veritaserum that she’d let other things slide. As well as her Transfiguration essay she also had a project for Potions to start.
Potions made her think of Snape. It had shocked her that she’d said he was her favourite Professor “ he wasn’t open like Sprout, witty like McGonagall or even entertaining like Flitwick “ but he held her attention in class and was astonishingly innovative with his concoctions. A thought wafted through her mind but she buried it firmly at the back of her brain. Her Transfiguration essay had to come first.
***
Hogwarts at this time of year was festooned with Christmas decorations. Professor Sprout had grown a larger than usual crop of mistletoe and it hung in great swathes over every doorway. Tonks was looking forward to Christmas because she was spending it at Hogwarts, her first time for several years. She had grumbled at the time when her parents said they were going away because Charlie and Aggie were going home to their families but now, with Charlie not talking to her and Aggie’s daily interrogations, she was looking forward to being by herself.
On the last day of term she was on her way to Potions, knowing that Snape wouldn’t let up on the work load. She was late and as she began to run she tripped over her feet and went flying across the floor. She careered head long into a boy standing in a doorway.
“Godric, I’m sorry,” she began then stopped “ it was Charlie “ “Wotcher, Charlie. Long time no see. How are you doing? Lessons going well? Seen Hagrid recently...?” She stopped, extremely aware that she was babbling nonsense to cover her embarrassment. He looked at her, not unkindly, and then pulled her to standing.
“Hi,” he said simply. He wasn’t smiling at her the way he used to. He didn’t seem to be angry anymore just sad.
“I miss you, Charlie,” she said and tears started to well in her eyes.
“Do I make your heart sing, Tonks?” he asked quietly.
‘It would be easy to lie,’ she thought, ‘I would have my friend back and Charlie would be happy again. Would it be so wrong?’ But she knew the answer even as she debated it. “Sorry, Charlie,” she whispered softly.
He gave a sad, twisted sort of smile then leant in and kissed her very carefully on the cheek.
“Have a good Christmas, Tonks,” he said and then he walked away.
Tearily she made her way to Potions aware that she was late.
“You’ve decided to join us then, Miss Tonks,” said Professor Snape sarcastically.
“Sorry,” she mumbled.
“Well as I was saying, the first term in this last NEWT year is nearly at an end so I want your project work on my desk now. As it is the last lesson of term, I give you free rein for the potion you brew today, as long as it’s from your Advanced Potions book. Is that clear?” he asked.
Tonks and her five other classmates nodded. She handed over her project work then went to sit down at the table she shared with the only other girl in the class, a Ravenclaw called Melody Harper.
Snape opened her proposal first and quickly scanned through the page. It was a good proposal for her final project and would take all her skill. He gestured for her to approach his desk.
“Miss Tonks,” he said quietly. “I am impressed with your proposal but tell me is there any particular reason why you want to brew Wolfsbane?”
End Notes:
Hmmm how's she going to explain that one? Hope you enjoyed that chapter. Please leave a review.
Chapter 4 - Grudge Match by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
January 6th “ Gryffindor V Hufflepuff “ it should be a walkover. Unfortunately, no one had counted on a careless comment to an unscrupulous journalist, an act of mischief and a sudden thirst for revenge from the normally docile Hufflepuffs.
All in all, not the best match to show off your Seeking skills for the scout from Puddlemere United.
It was the first day of the Christmas holidays but instead of lying in bed, as they were allowed to do if they were staying at Hogwarts, Tonks got up to join Aggie for breakfast.
“There’s hardly anyone staying,” said Aggie. “What are you going to do here?”
“Study, I expect,” replied Tonks with a faint note of disgust in her voice. “I’m hoping Professor Snape will let me use the dungeons for my project.”
She kept the smile off her face as she remembered her rather hurried explanation to Snape in yesterday’s class.
***
“Um, well...” she’d stuttered, “I’d like to do a complicated potion, Professor, and I’d also like to do one that could help certain sections of our society.”
“I think you’ll find the vast majority of those afflicted by Lycanthropy do not wish to be helped,” he’d replied. “Furthermore, it is so expensive that, even if they possessed a conscience, they’d never be able to afford it.”
“But if more witches or wizards could make it then it needn’t be that expensive, need it, sir?” she’d asked.
Professor Snape’s eyes had bored into her and she’d felt uncomfortable. She’d heard a rumour that he was versed in the art of Legilimency. She’d rather hoped he hadn’t seen the image of Remus bitten and clawed that was swimming at the back of her head. Concentrating firmly on not letting it through, she had done the first thing she ever did when she was under pressure “ she’d changed her hair to pink.
“I thought I told you that pink is not an appropriate colour for my class, Miss Tonks,” he’d said firmly.
“Is this better?” she’d asked.
Snape’s eyes had widened as it had changed to the first colour she'd thought of “ red.
“Just sit down, Miss Tonks, I’ll let you know about the Wolfsbane,” he’d said quietly.
She’d completed the rest of the lesson without any further comments from him about her project - or her hair - and successfully brewed a complicated pain relieving potion, which was so concentrated that only a few drops were required for anaesthesia. She'd bottled it carefully and presented it to him.
“Poenaserum,” she’d declared as he'd examined her efforts.
“Very commendable,” he’d said dryly. “First Wolfsbane, now this. Anyone would think you were thinking about becoming a Healer. I take it you’re still set on the Auror Department?”
“Yes, Professor. You did say we could do anything,” she’d replied. “I think Poenaserum could be useful in the field.”
He’d looked at her again but didn’t seem to be able to look as penetratingly as he had before.
“You may go, Miss Tonks,” he’d said and then turned back to the pile of parchment he needed to mark.
***
She walked outside with Aggie to wait for the horseless carriages. It was a cold day, and the morning frost still lay on the ground causing the grass to crunch beneath their feet. Tonks had left her cloak inside so she was hopping from foot to foot in an attempt to keep warm whilst she waved her friend off.
“Don’t think much of your victory dance, Nymphadora,” said the voice of the Gryffindor Quidditch captain. “It’s just as well you won’t need it.”
“Get lost, Oliver,” she said cheerily and then turned to face him. She’d always got on quite well with the fourth year Keeper, respecting his talent and his love of the game, but suddenly he was looking at her differently. There was a coldness in his eyes.
“Don’t go messing with Charlie’s head,” he said quietly. “He doesn’t need the hassle.”
“Who the hell are you to lecture me, Wood?” she exclaimed angrily. “A snotty, fourteen year old who thinks he’s Merlin because he can defend a hoop or three.”
“What’s going on here?” said Charlie, who was levitating his trunk towards them. He could see the furious expression on Tonks’ face and wondered what on earth Oliver had said.
“Nothing,” replied Tonks steadily. “Oliver was just trying to psych me out, that’s all. See you at the match, Wood. You won’t see me though because I’ll be the one flying so fast, I’ll be invisible!”
“Not if we stop you first,” said Fred who’d approached with George.
“What is this, a Weasley attack? OOOOH, I’m scared!” she mocked.
The Twins scowled but Charlie laughed. “Boys, we need to load up. Where’s Percy?”
“Probably in the library," said George.
“I’m coming,” shouted Percy. He strode towards them carrying a huge pile of books and a small box. Fred, unable to resist annoying his pompous brother, stuck his leg out and tripped him. Percy dropped the books and the box went flying. It opened and something small and brown fell out. Tonks caught it. She smiled; it was a rat, quite an old, sleepy looking rat. It opened an eye then tried to wriggle away from her hands.
“Don’t worry, little one, I won’t hurt you,” she crooned. “I’ll just put you...OW! He bit me. Godric, Percy, what’s wrong with him?”
“My rat, Scabbers. Give him here, he must be frightened,” said Percy.
“I caught him, the little git. He didn’t have to bite me,” she moaned. Her finger oozed with blood.
“Obviously doesn’t like you, Nymphadora,” said Fred.
“Shows great taste,” added George.
“Oy!” exclaimed Charlie. “Don’t be so rude. Help Percy with those books and then get in the carriage.” He looked at Tonks. “Can I have a quick word “ in private?” he asked, glaring at his brothers and Oliver.
She nodded and they stepped back behind a pillar.
“Sorry about that. Scabbers is usually so dopey we have to bite him to wake him up,” he joked.
“That’s all right, Charlie,” she said as she sucked her finger. “I’m...err...sorry about everything... you know...about us.”
He looked at her, a touch sadly. “Don’t apologise. You can’t help what you don’t feel.” He sighed then took her hand and sat down on the stone floor with her. “I want to know if you’re still going to see this Lupin guy over the holidays, because if you are, then... I’ll come with you...I’ll help.”
Tonks suddenly became very interested in her feet.
“I’ve already seen him,” she admitted. “That day I finished the Veritaserum.”
“You went alone,” he said in horror. “Tonks, anything could have happened! You know nothing about this bloke. Were you okay?”
“It wasn’t him,” she said bleakly.
He was silent for a while then put his hand on her cheek. “I’m sorry. I know how much you wanted to be right.”
“I haven’t exactly given up yet, Charlie, but.....” She stopped, deciding to change the subject. “You’d better go; your brothers are glaring again.”
Standing, they exchanged an awkward hug then Tonks gave him a quick peck on the cheek. She failed to see the scowl that Oliver was directing her way.
“See you next year, Charlie,” she said.
He got in the carriage and smiled. It wasn’t his usual beaming smile but it was a start.
***
As Aggie had predicted there were very few students staying at Hogwarts this Christmas. Tonks, for once, didn’t mind the solitude in the dorm. She was able to let her mind drift dangerously to that kiss with Remus and what would have happened if he hadn’t pulled away. It was, though, presumptuous of her to assume anything would have happened. He was at least thirty and she was only seventeen. Plus, she sighed to herself, she wasn’t the least bit beautiful, not like her mother. The only bit of Black in her were her dark eyes.
She looked in the mirror and began changing her hair and her face. Perhaps he liked blondes or brunettes, maybe he preferred girls with razor edge cheekbones or full dark red lips. She practised for a while then laughed. It was all very well her being able to change her appearance but it wasn’t permanent, she always reverted to the same girl after a while, the one with the pale heart shaped face and sweet smile. It had never bothered her before, but now she wondered if her ordinariness was the reason he’d stopped.
Tonks hadn’t lied to Aggie about studying; she just hadn’t mentioned that most of the books she would be looking at concerned Lycanthropy. There had been scant research for cures as most wizards considered werewolves beyond help, she was outraged to learn. The old superstitions were rife; they were to be shunned and forced to live on the very edges of society.
She wondered how on earth Remus managed to live but suspected he merely existed. She’d been shocked at how spare his body was, despite the muscular frame that was common to all werewolves. She blushed at the thought; she really must stop thinking about his body; it wasn’t helping with her project and was disturbing her sleep far too often for her liking. She turned back to her books. Wolfsbane was a very recent invention “ none of these books mentioned it but she was positive that Professor Snape would be able to help.
“In the library again, Miss Tonks,” said Professor Dumbledore.
She jumped up suddenly. “Oh, good afternoon, Professor, yes, it’s my Potions project. Bit of research.”
He picked up one of the books studied it. “Lycanthropy, Miss Tonks,” he said. “I never knew it was a particular interest of yours.” He looked at her through his half moon glasses. His blue eyes seemed especially piercing today.
“It’s...um...a recent interest because of my project. I want to brew Wolfsbane,” she said. She could feel herself blushing and seemed unable to disguise her rosy cheeks from the Headmaster.
“I see,” he said and then he put the book down and began to walk away.
“Professor Dumbledore,” she said suddenly. “You knew Sirius Black, didn’t you? You knew my cousin?”
He stopped walking but did not turn round. Achingly long seconds passed before he looked at her.
“Yes, Miss Tonks, I knew him well. At Hogwarts “ and later,” he said, sighing.
“Will you tell me about him?” she asked. “Please."
He sat down opposite her. “I have been waiting nearly seven years for you to come to me, Nymphadora. I have wondered at your lack of curiosity.”
“I’ve never been interested in his ‘guilt’, Professor, and that’s all anyone talks about. He’s been ripped off photographs in the Gryffindor common room,” she hesitated, knowing she shouldn’t have known that, “er...or so I’ve been told. It’s simple really, I’ve never thought he did what he’s been accused of and I’d like to know what the people who knew him, who really knew him, thought.”
“Why do you think he’s innocent?” he asked gently.
“Because I met him once, long ago and I met his friends. I met Lily and James, and Sirius loved them. Lily had just found out she was pregnant and Sirius was overjoyed...” She sniffed at the memory and was horrified to find tears spilling onto her parchment as she retold the story. “I cannot believe that man would ever have betrayed his friends.”
“And yet,” said Dumbledore sadly, “as I’m sure your mother has told you, he was their Secret-Keeper and only the Secret-Keeper could tell Voldemort where they were.”
“Could someone have forced it out of him? If the Cruciatus curse...”
Dumbledore put up his hand to stop her. “He was found after Peter Pettigrew’s death unharmed. The Cruciatus curse leaves marks, maybe not visible to the eye, but the scars are there. Besides,” he paused, wondering whether this was the right thing to say, “Sirius was one of the bravest young men I ever knew. They would not have been able to torture it out of him and leave him alive.”
“So, you think he was brave,” she said, her eyes alight with new hope.
“The Sirius Black I knew, Miss Tonks, was brave, loyal and reckless “ perhaps it’s a family trait,” he smiled directly at her, a touch sadly. “But war alters people and loyalties change. The best of people waver.”
She shook her head but said no more. Professor Dumbledore had been her last hope and she felt the tears sliding down her cheeks again. After a long while he got up from the table.
“Don’t work too long, Nymphadora,” he said softly. “The Christmas Feast is tomorrow and I can’t wait to see you do something festive with your hair.”
***
She had a restless night. Tortuous images of James, Lily, and Peter kept appearing whilst Sirius floated above them, laughing manically. He didn’t look how she remembered him. It wasn’t her Sirius, the grey eyes were dead, his face a waxy yellow and his hair was matted. This wasn’t the man she’d known. She woke up drenched in sweat and sobbing. She hadn’t closed the curtains properly and the moon shone through highlighting the empty beds around her. She wondered, as she did every time she saw the moon these days, how Remus was. She slept fitfully after that but had no more nightmares.
It was odd being alone in the dorm and being the only year seven Hufflepuff. Hearing some movement downstairs Tonks wandered down to the Hufflepuff common room to see two first years, a boy and a girl, and a third year lounging around on the cushions.
“Wotcher, guys!” she said, grinning at them. “Merry Christmas.”
They looked up at her. Tonks was something of a legend in Hufflepuff; she was good at Quidditch, bright but not big-headed. Continually falling over her own feet, she had no pretensions and was always the first to laugh at her ineptitude.
“You all had breakfast?” she asked. They nodded.
“There aren’t many people here,” piped up the third year, a girl Tonks thought might be called Rosy. “Two Gryffindors, four Ravenclaws and no Slytherins.”
“I’m glad there’s no Slytherins here,” replied one of the first years. “They’re all so mean.”
“Not all Slytherins are mean,” said Tonks sharply. “My mum was one.”
The girl blushed.
“The ones in our classes all seem to be,” added the boy. “And Professor Snape’s horrible.”
“Professor Snape’s fine,” said Tonks. “He appreciates hard work, that’s all. Hufflepuffs are good at hard work, aren’t we?”
She went to the door.
“Well, if you guys have eaten; I shall go to breakfast by myself,” she said.
“I think breakfast’s over, Tonks,” said the third year girl.
Tonks grinned. “That’s okay; I know where to get some food.”
When Tonks had first started at Hogwarts her dad, Ted, had given only two pieces of advice.
“If you’re ever hungry, Dora, then tickle the pear on the painting of the giant fruit bowl and you’ll get into the kitchens but,” he’d added, “make sure you’re nice to the house-elves. They probably still remember me and I can’t have you letting the Tonks name down!”
“Thanks, Dad,” she muttered to herself as she entered the kitchen.
All around her, little house-elves were busy preparing the Christmas Feast.
“Wotcher,” she said to them. A few turned round to greet her, and then turned back to carry on with their work.
“You’re all very busy. I thought you’d have less to do as there’s so few of us here.”
“We is still busy, Miss Tonks,” said her favourite house-elf, a female called Frinkle. “We is wanting to make this feast the best it can be.”
“Oh,” said Tonks. “Well, can I help?”
The house-elves stopped what they were doing and nudged each other. Then they all gave Frinkle a knowing look. Frinkle straightened her tea towel and walked up to Tonks.
“If you’ll be excusin’ us, miss, but we is not needin’ any of your help. You is our guest and we would not want to put you out,” she said quickly.
“Frinkle, really, it’s no trouble. Tell me what I can do.”
The other house-elves turned back to the table and began chopping things. Tonks was aware they were listening.
“Beggin’ your pardon, miss,” began Frinkle, “but the last time you helped...”
Tonks chuckled, remembering that the last time she’d helped; she’d knocked over a vat of pumpkin juice that went over all over the floor. House-elves had been sliding all over the place and the food that night had been distinctly pumpkin flavoured.
“I take your point, Frinkle,” she said. “Can I get myself some breakfast, though? I’m absolutely famished!”
The Christmas meal, thanks to Frinkle’s intervention, was not pumpkin flavoured. It was wonderful. Because there were so few students staying, Professor Dumbledore declared that the students could sit up at the big table with the teachers. Tonks found herself sitting down one end with a Gryffindor on one side and the Muggle Studies professor on the other. As the Gryffindor, no doubt on Oliver’s instructions, refused to enter into a conversation with her, she found herself listening to the other conversations rather than chatting. Professor Quirrell was talking about a planned trip to Albania. His stutter was turning a simple story into a saga. She could see Professor Snape trying to stifle a yawn and she giggled.
He looked across at her.
“Your hair, Miss Tonks,” he said, cutting across Quirrell’s ongoing story.
“It’s Christmas, Professor Snape!” she exclaimed. “Besides, the Headmaster practically ordered me to do something festive.” She tossed the silver and gold curls out of her eyes and scowled at him.
“I was going to say, it’s very...inventive,” he said and almost smiled.
Tonks snorted. From Snape that was a compliment. She could hear Professor McGonagall talking to Professor Sprout near her. Both appeared to be quite flushed in the face.
“Yes, he’s from Puddlemere United,” she said. “He’s coming here especially to see the match or rather Charlie Weasley, I should say.”
“The match on the sixth?” asked Professor Sprout. “The match against Hufflepuff?”
“That’s right,” said Professor McGonagall. “I hope your team can put up a decent fight this year, Pomona. I wouldn’t want Charlie to catch the Snitch too easily.”
“Well,” said Professor Sprout, a touch waspishly, “I’m sure my Chaser over there will do her best!”
“What?” said Tonks, not wishing to get drawn into an argument over Quidditch. “Oh, we’re all raring to go, Professor McGonagall. We won’t make it too easy for you.”
The Gryffindor boy next to her stiffened; the irony in Tonks’ voice, which Professor McGonagall had missed, had not escaped him. She noticed that Snape appeared to be enjoying the contretemps.
“Be nice to see a Hufflepuff victory, Miss Tonks,” he whispered.
“You’re only saying that, sir, because we have no chance of overtaking you after you thrashed us,” she said. “If we beat Gryffindor it would, more or less, hand you the Cup.”
“True,” he agreed. “But wouldn’t it be satisfying to beat a team of such stars?”
She shrugged. “If a scout’s coming to see us play, it might be nice to make a game of it.”
“No chance!” muttered the Gryffindor boy next to her but she ignored him.
***
On the morning of the sixth of January, Tonks woke up very early. It wasn’t really nerves, she told herself, she wasn’t too concerned about the match, after all what was a scout to her? But it would be nice for Charlie, she guessed, and that must be what the butterflies in her stomach were for.
She hadn’t really seen Charlie since he got back last Wednesday. Classes had barely begun and both teams were practising hard. Realising it was too early for breakfast she turned over in her bed and tried to get back to sleep.
She woke again when Aggie shook her.
“Wake up! Wake up, Tonks,” she cried. “It’s ten to ten and you must have breakfast.”
Washing and dressing quickly the two girls rushed into the Great Hall. The instant she entered, Tonks knew there was something wrong. The chatter had stopped and all eyes were on her. She could see the Hufflepuffs looking at her nervously and trying to hide something. The Gryffindors, however, looked cock-a-hoop. She studied the table “ none of the Gryffindor team was there. Frowning, she found a seat next to a first year at her table. The first year was trying to sit on something.
“Give,” she ordered imperiously.
The first year blushed and handed over a copy of The Daily Prophet.
“Tonks,” said her captain, a large florid boy called Digby Stone. “Don’t look at that. It’s nonsense.” He tried to grab the paper from her but she was too quick. She opened it up and gasped. There on the front cover was a large unflattering picture of her. The headline read:
Masquerading as a Hufflepuff!
by Rita Skeeter
“What the...?” she whispered then hurriedly scanned the article.
Ten years ago the wizarding world was rocked by the deaths of James and Lily Potter, betrayed by their best friend, Sirius Black. A few months later, his cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange, was thrown into prison for torturing Frank and Alice Longbottom into insanity. We hoped the Black Family stronghold on evil had been broken, but maybe they left a legacy. The niece of Bellatrix Lestrange, the cousin of Sirius Black “ a witch called Nymphadora Tonks “ studies at Hogwarts. She is about to graduate; she tells everyone she wants to be an Auror. But can the Auror department trust someone with such a family?
We spoke to the person that knows her best, her former boyfriend, Charlie Weasley, a future Professional Quidditch player. Obviously broken hearted, he refused to give us details of their split but could not deny that her family background loomed large in their relationship. He walked out of our interview, in distress, when pushed further. His parting remark, however, was a telling one.
“Nymphadora Tonks is masquerading as a Hufflepuff.”
She could not read anymore. She felt physically sick. There were pictures of her alongside the photograph of Sirius being dragged away to Azkaban. Then the proud face of her aunt mocked her.
“How could he?” Tonks cried. “How could he?”
“It’s rubbish, Tonks,” said Aggie firmly. “Tomorrow’s chip paper. Don’t read any more.”
“Do you believe this?” she said to Digby.
He looked her straight in the eye. “No.”
She gazed again at the paper then slowly screwed it into a ball. “Let’s get a move on. We have a Quidditch match to win.”
***
As a team, they strode to their dressing room. Her team mates, all boys, surrounded her, protecting her from the curious looks of the other students. But there would be no protection on the pitch. She entered the dressing room with her lip trembling, wondering whether she should play. Once in though, a sound changed her mind “ laughter. She could hear Charlie, next door, laughing that infectious chuckle with his team. A cold, hard fury built up inside her. She walked outside and, grabbing a copy of The Prophet from a nearby student, stormed into their dressing room.
“Hey, Tonks,” said Charlie cheerily. “Can’t you knock?”
How can he still be smiling? she thought, noticing that even his brothers and Oliver had stopped laughing. A new player, a girl Tonks thought might be called Angelina, looked at her then hastily looked away.
“Saw your interview, Weasley,” spat Tonks. “Tell me one thing, how much did they pay you to slag me off?”
“W-what?” said Charlie. “I never...Tonks...please, what are you talking about?”
“Your interview in The Prophet, Weasley. The one where you told the reporter how evil my family was and how I’d broken your heart.”
She threw the paper at him. Charlie picked it up and quickly scanned the article.
“Tonks, please,” he said in shock. “You have to believe me, I said nothing like this to her. This Skeeter woman came over to ask me about the Puddlemere United scout that’s coming here. I said we’d been out once or twice, but I swear I barely mentioned you.”
“Yeah, right,” she said scornfully. “What’s all this ‘Masquerading as a Hufflepuff’ crap then?”
Charlie sighed. “She was talking about the opposition, saying that Hufflepuff should be a pushover and I said it was unlikely because they had you playing.” He paused for breath, knowing this sounded lame. “I said you were as brave as any Gryffindor and it was a mystery why you were in Hufflepuff, that’s all.”
“That’s all! That’s all!” she screamed at him. “You think Gryffindors have the monopoly on bravery? You think Hufflepuff are really so useless we can only win if we import Gryffindors?”
She turned from him and noticed for the first time that the Twins and Wood were smirking. Slowly, she took some deep breaths. She’d said her piece and should now be getting back to her team but something stopped her.
“One more thing, how come every single student in Hogwarts seemed to be reading this article? The Prophet has never been that popular.”
She heard a sound coming from Fred and George and stared at them. Charlie looked at them.
“Boys,” he said in a quiet voice, “did you have anything to do with this?”
“Well,” said Fred, “we might have...err...”
“Duplicated a few copies,” finished George.
“And distributed them,” muttered Angelina, clearly uncomfortable with the story.
“Why?” said Charlie. He glanced across at Tonks whose face seemed to be set in stone.
“She hurt you, Charlie. You were playing like a constipated house-elf and...” explained Fred.
“We thought if we could unsettle Nymphadora...” said George, looking down at the ground, clearly embarrassed.
Charlie turned to Oliver. “You knew about this, didn’t you? That’s why you got me to go down to breakfast alone with you. It wasn’t to pick my brains at all, was it?”
Oliver nodded mutely.
“Not worthy of a Gryffindor, Oliver,” said Charlie dangerously, “and certainly not worthy of a Gryffindor Quidditch Captain. You should be in Slytherin.”
The instant Tonks reacted; Charlie knew he’d made a dreadful mistake.
“My mother was a Slytherin, you arsehole!” she yelled at him. She looked at them all. “You’re going to need all you so-called bravery today; I’ll make sure of that.”
Back in the Hufflepuff dressing room, she turned to her team mates.
“Potter’s record,” she said. “I want it!”
***
Oblivious to the drama going on between the teams; the Professors entered their box. The Puddlemere United scout sat next to Professor McGonagall who was extolling the virtues of her team. Pomona Sprout raised her eyebrows and caught Filius Flitwick’s eye.
“Where’s Albus?” she asked him.
“He’ll be along later; he had a visitor,” replied Filius.
There was a loud roar as both teams walked onto the pitch. Tonks looked up to the Hufflepuffs decked in yellow and saluted them fiercely.
“You do realise, Oliver,” said Charlie to his captain, "Tonks is so fired up after your stunt that she’ll play out of her skin.”
“One person, Charlie,” replied Oliver, “she can’t do it all herself.”
“One very popular person and she has a loyal team behind her,” added Charlie. He flew off into the sky leaving Oliver to guard his hoops and feeling guiltier by the second.
“What do you mean by Potter’s record?” whispered Digby to Tonks.
“Fastest one hundred, Digby,” she replied. “James Potter set the Chaser record in 1977 against Hufflepuff. He scored one hundred points in thirty six minutes. I want to beat it!”
“Okay,” considered Digby. “How do we do this?”
“I need to be the one scoring goals. I need the Quaffle when I’m in front of goal and the others on our team can’t score. It has to be me alone...” She stopped, then carried on. “Digby, it’s an incredibly selfish record. It’s not really worthy of Hufflepuff but...”
He shrugged. “D’you know something, Tonks? I get a bit fed up with our ‘good losers’ tag. Let’s do this. I’ll tell the guys and we’ll protect you as much as we can.”
“Thanks,” she said. “I won’t let you down.”
After ten minutes of the match, Gryffindor knew they were up against a different Hufflepuff team. Spearheading the charge, Tonks rapidly scored three goals to put them thirty “ nil up. Lee Jordan, in the commentary box, could barely believe the action.
“Is this the same team that lost so disastrously to Slytherin?” he asked the crowd. “Come on, Gryffindor. Put up a fight!” he screamed as Tonks’ fourth goal flew into Oliver’s left hand hoop.
“Ready for more, Wood?” she yelled at him.
The Hufflepuffs in the stands were screaming for their team. Rejuvenated by their lead, they cried with joy as her fifth and sixth goals were scored by the twenty minute mark.
“Come on, Gryffindor,” yelled Lee. “Tonks is winning this single-handed.”
Lee looked down at his Quidditch through the Ages book which he kept by him in case he needed to find statistics in a hurry. There was something about the speed of these goals that caught his attention. He noticed, moreover, that the other Hufflepuff Chasers were deliberately not scoring when they had the chance. It was true that Tonks was playing out of her skin, but they were clearly giving her all the opportunities to score. Something clicked in his memory as the seventh goal was scored.
“Potter’s record!” he shouted to the crowd. “I do believe that Nymphadora Tonks is going for James Potter’s fastest one hundred. This could be a day for the record books.”
Two men entered the commentary box. Snape moved slightly to let his Headmaster in. The sight of Gryffindor being humbled and the thought that Potter’s record may soon be broken made him smirk. He watched as Tonks narrowly missed her eighth goal.
“Twenty five minutes, everyone,” said Lee. “She has eleven minutes left to claim the record.”
Wood tried to signal for a time-out but Charlie glared at him. He swooped down on the Keeper. “Don’t you dare, Wood. You and my brothers got us into this, I’ll try and get us out by catching the Snitch, but don’t you dare ruin her momentum!”
Professor McGonagall looked at the man who’d sat beside Professor Dumbledore.
“Merlin’s Beard!” she exclaimed. “What on earth are you doing here, Remus Lupin?”
Snape whipped his head round to see an old enemy the other side of Dumbledore.
“Lupin,” he snarled. “Why are you here?”
“He’s here as my guest, Severus,” said Professor Dumbledore calmly. “Oh well done, Nymphadora!” he said as she scored her eighth goal. Then he turned back to Snape. “I trust you will be courteous to my guest.”
Snape glared at Remus but nodded all the same. Both men focused on Tonks who had just sent the Quaffle once more into the hoops, straight under Wood’s legs this time. Professor McGonagall had her head in her hands whilst Professor Sprout was leaping up and down. She joined in the chants of the Hufflepuff Supporters.
“Tonks! Tonks! Tonks!” they cried.
“It’s the thirty minute mark, everybody,” said Lee. “Tonks has six minutes left. Can she do it? Can she score the final goal?”
Suddenly from nowhere the Snitch appeared. Benjy Hunt, the Hufflepuff Seeker, saw it in the corner of his eye. He knew he didn’t have the speed or class of Charlie Weasley. If he reacted now, Charlie would beat him to the catch. He turned his broom in the opposite direction and sped off quickly, praying that Charlie would follow.
“Has Hunt seen the Snitch?” shouted Lee. The crowd were in uproar. Would the Hufflepuff Seeker catch it before the great Charlie Weasley? Would he ruin Tonks’ chance of the record?
“No, it’s gone again,” said Lee, sighing. “Three minutes to go.”
Tonks, momentarily distracted by Benjy’s dive, retrieved the Quaffle from Digby and sped off again towards the Gryffindor goal. The Gryffindor players chased her, determined to keep the record in-house, but she was too quick for them; she was too quick for anyone today.
So like Sirius, thought Remus. His eyes sparkled as he watched her catch the Quaffle again. Fred and Georges’ Bludgers rained down on her but she flew like a hawk, whipping between them as her own Beaters batted them away. She looked up and saw, for a fleeting moment, the look of resignation on Wood’s face as she powered the Quaffle into the middle hoop.
“Sorry, James,” she yelled, and she lifted her face to the heavens, “but that one’s for Sirius!”
“Thirty four minutes,” shouted Lee. “It’s a new record! Nymphadora Tonks has scored the fastest one hundred Hogwarts has ever seen. She has smashed James Potter’s record by two minutes!”
“What are you thinking, Remus?” asked Dumbledore, as he noticed his former pupil laughing with exhilaration.
“I’m thinking how very like Sirius she is,” he said, without thinking, “although he couldn’t fly like her.” He heard all the Professors gasp and saw Snape’s eyes boring into him.
“You can’t deny her courage,” he said boldly. “Even James would have found Tonks hard to beat today.”
Snape looked at him strangely, Remus realised he’d used her nickname and hastily tore his eyes away to watch, instead, her celebrations on the pitch.
“You don’t think he’d have been annoyed to see his record go?” said Dumbledore.
“Of course not,” replied Remus. “He’d have been cheering her all the way.”
“Before getting on his own broomstick to try and recapture it!” said Professor McGonagall wryly.
Remus grinned. “Yes, he would have wanted it back but he wouldn’t begrudge Miss Tonks her moment.”
Digby called a time out so that she could receive the applause from her House. The crowd stood to clap the new record holder and one by one, under Charlie’s urgings, the Gryffindors stood to cheer her. Tonks ripped off her helmet. It was a gesture she usually did at the end of every match to show her House her canary yellow hair.
But this time it was different. She stopped in front of the Gryffindor stand. This is for the Gryffindor Black, she thought, as she screwed her face up and turned her hair his colour. It fell in waves to her shoulders and she swept it off her face, arrogantly. Remus gasped, as did Snape. She did a speedy lap of honour and then flew over to the commentary box to see Professor Sprout. As she approached, she faltered.
Good Godric! she thought, What on earth is Remus doing here?
Tonks shuddered to a halt. She noticed he was smiling at her, cheering her. She grinned back and, taking both hands off her broom, she raised her arms up high.
Distracted by his smile, by the sheer joy she was feeling at seeing him again, she missed the sound of the Bludger heading towards her. She didn’t hear it whizzing behind her but she felt its force as it knocked her off and she fell down, down, down towards the earth.
End Notes:
Is it the end of Tonks? Well, hardly as I have a few chapters left and JK Rowling wrote some things about her too. Please leave a review. I thrive on reviews.
Chapter 5- Opportunities by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
After being knocked unconscious by a Bludger, Tonks wakes up in the hospital wing to find Remus and Professor Dumbledore by her bedside. Why was Remus Lupin at that match and how much has he told her Headmaster about their meeting?
Thanks, as ever, to Terri (mudbloodproud) for beta'ing this for me.
As Tonks fell down to the ground, Remus quickly drew his wand to cast an Immobilisation spell. He wasn’t the only one. Dumbledore and Snape were both as quick to react, fearful of seeing the young girl’s body spread-eagled on the grass.
But one person was quicker than any of them; one person who had been watching her all the time, as she flew her lap of honour, and saw the Bludger coming towards her. Charlie Weasley, with unerring instincts, had realised the danger and rushed towards her as she toppled down unconscious. A few feet from the ground, he grabbed an arm, scooped her up and gently brought her back to earth.
“She’s hurt,” he yelled. “Her head’s bleeding. Get some help!”
Madam Pomfrey ran onto the pitch and conjured a stretcher for her. The crowd began to sit down. Remus stayed where he was, staring anxiously at her lifeless form.
“What happens now?” whispered Angelina to Oliver as they watched in horror. “Do we play on?”
“Yes,” replied Oliver bleakly. “The game doesn’t end until the Snitch is caught but I’m not sure if Hufflepuff will want to carry on with only six players.”
Madam Pomfrey began to levitate the stretcher towards the hospital wing. She whispered something to Charlie, who immediately flew to the commentary box.
He looked pale and his voice shook as he spoke to Professor Dumbledore.
“Madam Pomfrey is taking Tonks in now. She says she’ll be fine.” His voice sounded doubtful.
“Charlie,” said Professor McGonagall kindly, “she wouldn’t lie to you. I’m sure Nymphadora will be fine.”
Charlie Weasley, thought Remus shakily as he looked at the ashen faced boy. He obviously cares a great deal “ whatever Tonks might think.
Professor Sprout stood up. “I need to be with Nymphadora,” she said suddenly. “I...I.” she stuttered, and Remus could see she was trembling.
“Pomona, why don’t you sit with your House?” said Professor Dumbledore. “They need you too. I shall take your place and Remus,” he paused and looked towards the white, shaken man, “perhaps you can accompany me.”
Charlie started in surprise and nearly fell off his broom. So that is Remus Lupin, he thought. Remus looked at him wobbling on his broomstick and smiled tentatively.
“Mr Weasley,” said Professor Dumbledore, his eyes flickering from Remus to the boy hovering nearby. “I think you’ll find the match is starting up again and Gryffindor is one hundred points down.”
“Er...yeah, Professor. I guess I’d better get back.” He started to fly back, but then he stopped. “If...” he began.
“If we have any further news,” said Professor Dumbledore, “we’ll let you know.”
Remus watched as Charlie flew back to his team and began shouting at two red-haired boys, who were white-faced with shock.
“Are you two responsible for that?” he yelled furiously. “What the hell do you think you’re doing chucking Bludgers during a time out?”
“Mr Weasley...Charlie,” said Madam Hooch, “calm down. It wasn’t your brothers’ fault. They were practising during the time out and one of the Bludgers collided with another and veered off towards Miss Tonks.” She hovered alongside him and clasped his arm. “She’s tough, Charlie. She’ll be fine. Now, how about you show that scout over there just what you can do.”
***
Tonks came to about an hour later. The winter sunlight was flooding through the hospital windows. As she opened her eyes, she was hit by a wave of pain. There was a stray black lock of hair across her eye. She tried to push it off her face, but for some reason her right arm wouldn’t move. She could see a blurred outline sitting in a chair next to her.
“Did we win?” she said groggily.
The person sitting by her bedside chuckled. “Most people would say ‘Where am I?’ when they come round after a blow to the head.”
She squinted at the voice. “Remus,” she whispered. “It was you. Did you see me get James’ record?” she said.
“Yes,” said Remus, and she could see him smiling. “Nothing wrong with your memory, Tonks.”
She tried to move the lock of hair from her face again but couldn’t.
“Have I hurt my arm or something?” she mumbled.
“You dislocated it,” said Remus. “Charlie Weasley caught you by the arm, as you fell, but he wrenched your arm out of its socket. Madam Pomfrey has fixed it and your arm’s now in a sling.”
“Oh, okay.” She moved her other arm and pushed the hair off her face. It fell back over her eyes.
“Godric, how did Sirius put up with hair this ridiculous length?” she said. Remus could see her wince as she tried to morph back to pink spikes.
“Ah, not working,” she sighed. She lay back on the pillows.
“I’m sure your powers will be restored soon, Miss Tonks,” said Professor Dumbledore benevolently. She looked over to the window where the Headmaster was standing. “But, for now, perhaps it’s your body’s way of telling you to stop.”
“Stop,” she said, surprised that the Headmaster was there. “Stop what?”
“Your search for the ‘truth’,” he replied in clear authoritative tones. He moved across the ward and stood at the end of her bed. “It seems to be putting you at risk.”
She opened her mouth to say something but Dumbledore’s upraised hand forestalled her. “I don’t mean danger, Miss Tonks, although your distraction on your broom today concerns me. I mean the risk to your future if you continue to follow this path.”
“I don’t know what you mean, sir,” she said stubbornly, but she couldn’t quite meet his eyes.
Dumbledore pulled up a chair alongside the bed. “Nymphadora,” he said gently. “The Ministry believe that Sirius Black is a Death Eater and a traitor. If your blind loyalty carries on you will never even be admitted to the Auror training programme, let alone qualify as an Auror.”
“I don’t care,” she said tearfully.
“Tonks,” said Remus. “Listen to Professor Dumbledore. I knew Sirius better than anyone alive today. If he’s innocent, he won’t want you ruining your life for him and if he’s guilty, he’s not worth it “ however much you loved him as a child.”
There was a silence in the ward; Tonks could feel hot tears running down her cheeks and tried to lift her injured arm again to wipe them away.
“Damn it!” she cried in frustration. She looked around the ward, desperately wanting to change the subject, conscious that both men were watching her.
“Why are you here?” she asked Remus at last.
Remus flushed. He was wondering when she’d get around to that.
“I was...er,” he began. He stopped and looked down at his feet. She could see him fiddling with his wand as he tried to think what to say.
“He was here to see me, Nymphadora,” said Professor Dumbledore, “and I invited him to see the match. Remus told me you had met him.”
She gulped waiting to face the Headmaster’s censure. She wasn’t exactly sure of the rules but bunking off school during term, nicking ingredients from the Potion Master’s storeroom to brew a controlled substance, and spiking someone’s drink would probably spell the end of her Hogwarts days “ at least.
“I...I can explain, sir,” she spluttered, and then caught Remus’ eye. He was shaking his head slightly, mouthing ‘It’s okay.’ She shut her mouth and forced herself to stare at the Headmaster, not at Remus.
“Yes,” continued Dumbledore after a while. “Remus has told me that you met up with him, quite by chance, in Hogsmeade over the Christmas holidays and that you asked him about your cousin.” His voice was laced with irony and Tonks knew he didn’t quite believe Remus’ version of events. “He wrote to me shortly after, expressing concern for your wellbeing and I invited him here today.”
“Oh,” she said quietly. She looked at Remus and smiled. “Did you enjoy the match?”
“What I saw of it was fantastic, Tonks,” he replied, and then a grin appeared on his face. “Sirius would have loved it.”
“Even though I took the record away from his best friend?” she said impishly.
Remus sat back in his chair and laughed. She could see he looked younger when he smiled.
“Especially because you took the record away from his best friend,” he replied. “James was a great player and he knew it. The number of times he went on about that record. It annoyed the hell out of us, so having a Black beat a Potter would have had Sirius crowing for years.” He laughed again but there was a sadder note in his voice now.
Dumbledore stood up to leave. “I’ll give you a few more minutes, Remus, but she needs her rest and Mr Weasley is outside waiting to see her.”
“Charlie’s here?” she exclaimed. “Oh, Helga, I bet he’s angry. I must have rotted up his chances with the scout.”
“I think that’s the last thing on his mind,” replied Professor Dumbledore. “He’s far more concerned about the interview he gave to The Prophet. Miss Tonks, I think you should know that Rita Skeeter has caught out many a wiser man than Charlie Weasley. I doubt he meant any harm when he talked of you.”
“I know,” she said and then sighed. “It was shock more than anything. Tell him it’s forgotten.”
He nodded and left the room. There was an awkward silence as Remus looked at the floor.
“Thank you for not telling him about the Veritaserum and everything. You have every right to be angry with me,” she said. As she moved her head, the hair flopped over her face again. “Damn it!” she muttered and tried to sweep it off her face. It fell over her eyes again.
Instinctively, Remus reached out and gently smoothed the long black tress round her ear, carefully avoiding the large bruise on her forehead.
Such a small gesture but it sent a tingle down her spine. His fingers stopped and seemed to dwell on her cheekbone. She held her breath.
He blinked rapidly and removed his hand. “You have a bruise there, Tonks,” he said and quickly looked away. He stood up. “I should go,” he said.
“I made something for you,” she blurted out. “I made some of that salve in Potions, it’s in my room, and...” she gulped. “Wolfsbane...I’m going to learn how to make that. It’s my term project with Professor Snape...if he approves it, of course.”
He smiled wryly. “After today, I don’t think your Potions Master will be quite so eager to create Wolfsbane, especially if he thinks you’re brewing it for me.”
“Why not?” she said, frowning at him.
“Snape was at school with me, with us, I should say. We… er… didn’t get on, I’m afraid,” admitted Remus. “He hated Sirius and James, although he had good cause on plenty of occasions. He discovered I was a werewolf in our fifth year.”
“Ah,” said Tonks. “So charging round a Quidditch pitch screaming Sirius’ name and changing my hair jet black isn’t the best way to get on his good side.”
He laughed, ruefully, “Not really, Tonks.”
“Probably just earned myself a Troll grade,” she said, sighing. “I can still send you the salve, if you like.” She didn’t want him to leave.
“That’s okay,” he said and pointed to her head and arm. “You probably need it more than me. Besides, I’m not sure where I’ll be for a while.”
“Why?” she said, suddenly worried. “Where are you going?”
“Away. Abroad to be more precise. Professor Dumbledore has suggested something to me and I’m going off to do some research.”
He looked round the ward, and then moved over to the window where he could see the grounds of Hogwarts.
“Apart from your injury, today has been wonderful. I was so very happy here.” She could see the happiness on his face that she’d glimpsed the morning he’d showed her the tunnel. He looked back at her, lying forlornly on a hospital bed. “You must take care of yourself, Tonks. Please don’t do anything rash.”
“I can’t give up on him,” she said bleakly.
“I’m not telling you to give up on him, Tonks,” he said, looking straight at her. “But who is better placed than an Auror to uncover the truth?”
“Do you have to go?” she said impulsively, and her fingers began pleating the sheet that covered her. She wanted to continue this conversation; to prolong her time with this man. She could feel him slipping away and wondered if this was the last time she’d see him.
He sighed. “Yes, I have things to do. Besides, your Gryffindor Seeker’s been waiting outside all this time. I think it’s only fair that your rescuer gets to spend some time with you.” He paused. “He’s a good lad, Tonks; perhaps you should give him another chance.”
“I know how good he is,” she said reluctantly, “but we’re better as friends.”
“Good basis for love,” he said softly.
“Not if there’s nothing else there,” she replied. “There’s no spark with Charlie.” She shook her head and then winced. “Sorry, you don’t want to hear all this. I sound like some silly teenager writing to the Witch Weekly agony witch.”
Remus looked down at her sad face. He had rather hoped to see her smile before he left. Putting his hand in his pocket, he pulled out a photo and sat down on the edge of the bed.
“I found this… if you want it,” he said.
She took it from him. It was a picture of the four Marauders accompanied by some girls. Sirius was ruffling James’ hair and had his other arm around a girl with blonde, unruly curls. She recognised Lily, who was sitting furthest away from James. She noticed how Lily and James seemed to be ignoring each other but occasionally their eyes would flicker sideways and meet.
“When was this taken?” she asked, a lump appearing in her throat.
“End of our sixth year. James and Lily were not officially going out then, but we strongly suspected there was something going on.” He laughed as he remembered those times. “Sirius has his arm round a lovely girl called Martha, they dated for a while. Peter and I were footloose and fancy-free, as they say.”
“Really,” she said sceptically. “That dark-haired girl seems to be looking at you quite intently.”
He took the picture and studied it. “Oh, her. Well, I guess she was an ex.” He frowned as he handed the picture back. “It’s one of the few pictures I have of all of us together. I destroyed a lot of them after...”
“You don’t have to give it to me,” she said, although she longed for one picture, one small reminder of Sirius in happier times. She also found herself desperately wanting to keep a reminder of Remus, too. “Don’t you want to take it with you?”
“I’ll probably lose it, Tonks. I’d like you to have it.”
“I can’t accept it, Remus. I know what it must mean to you,” she said, sniffing.
“Take care of it for me, then,” he compromised. “And when I come back and find you’re a top notch Auror, you can return it to me. Deal?”
“Deal,” she said and broke into a wide grin.
That’s what I wanted to see, he thought. That beautiful smile.
Waiting at the door, Charlie saw Remus slowly get up from Tonks’ bed. He watched as Tonks held out her hand in an attempt to make him stay and saw the smile on her face; the smile that could light up a room. He stayed where he was until Remus walked up to him.
“She’s all yours, Charlie,” said Remus lightly.
If only, thought Charlie sadly. He walked over to her bedside and sat on the chair.
“Wotcher!” said Tonks. “How did it go?”
“What?” said Charlie, distracted by the large bruise that was discolouring the side of her face.
“The scout, Weasley. How did it go with the scout?”
“Oh, that. I don’t know. I came straight here after the match and he went off somewhere with McGonagall. I don’t think he was that impressed, to be honest. You totally outclassed us today.”
“Are you telling me Hufflepuff won?” said Tonks excitedly. “Wow, that’s amazing. We beat the mighty Gryffs. YESSSS!”
Charlie snorted. “Sorry to burst your little Hufflepuff bubble, Nymphadora, but you didn’t win “ you just weren’t as comprehensively beaten as you usually are.” He grinned. “I meant that you outclassed us. Once you’d gone, Angelina got a goal back and, although Digby got you one more, I caught the Snitch, so it was one hundred and sixty against one hundred and ten to Gryffindor.”
“So the scout saw you make the catch then?” she said encouragingly.
“Mmm, but it wasn’t a particularly good catch. I nearly fluffed it,” he muttered. He sighed and looked around the room. Talking about the match was great but it wasn’t why he was here. He took a deep breath.
“Tonks, I’ve come here to say sorry about the article and...”
“Forget it, Weasley. I should have known you wouldn’t say anything rotten. You’re one of the good guys,” she replied.
He grimaced. ‘Good guys’ in his book didn’t win the girls.
“Not just about the article, Tonks. I’m sorry about that crack about Slytherin. I forgot about your mum. You’re right, you know, not all Slytherins are underhanded.”
“Not all Hufflepuffs are ‘duffers’ either,” she said, smiling.
“Nope,” he replied, “and Gryffindors certainly don’t have the monopoly on brave, reckless behaviour. I think you proved that today.”
There was a pause, and then she grinned mischievously, “Ravenclaws are still a stuck up bunch of smart-arses though, aren’t they, Weasley?”
“Yeah,” he laughed, “Sodding know-it-alls!” He looked at the photo in her hand. “What’s that?” he asked her, peering round to get a look.
“Oh, Remus gave it to me. It’s a photograph he found from his Hogwarts days. Look at them. They all look so happy.”
Charlie frowned. He wasn’t sure Lupin should be encouraging her like this. Black was guilty for Godric’s sake! He watched her engrossed in the photo studying Sirius from every angle. He noticed her thumb covering up a girl’s face. It was a dark haired girl sitting to the left of Lupin.
“Remus said that James and Lily weren’t together at the time, but they look very aware of each other, don’t they?” said Tonks. “Remus thinks they were probably secretly seeing each other. He said that Sirius was dating that blonde girl and he was single.” She paused in her reverie.
Charlie noticed that she seemed to be starting a lot of her sentences with the word Remus. Not Lupin now, he thought, yet I’m still Weasley.
There was a noise behind them as a man, accompanied by Professor McGonagall, swept into the room.
“Mr Bloomsbury, you really shouldn’t be in here. Miss Tonks is not well,” remonstrated the Professor.
“Nonsense,” said the man breezily in his bluff, Yorkshire accent. “I’m a busy man and what I have to say concerns both of them.”
He strode forward to the bed. “’Ay-up lad, that was a pretty pickle of a match you got tangled up in then, wasn’t it?”
Charlie goggled at this brash looking man wearing a very loud jacket. He presumed Mr Bloomsbury was the Puddlemere United scout.
“Er...not one of my best, sir,” he replied, “but I caught the Snitch at the end.”
“Hmm, you nearly missed it though, didn’t you,” stated Mr Bloomsbury. “Your other catch was far more impressive.”
“Sorry,” said Charlie. “What other catch?”
“The lass here, Miss Nymphadora Tonks. Now that was a fine piece of flying,” he said with authority. “Shame she was on the other side, but I know what you Gryffindors are like.”
He paused and then reached into the inner pocket of his jacket and pulled out a wad of parchment. “I have a contract here, ready for your signature, Mr Weasley. You’ll make a fine addition to our team at Puddlemere.”
With a stunned look on his face, Charlie took the contract from him. He stared down at the terms, the place for his signature, and saw the money being offered to him. It was a huge amount. Much more than Bill got at Gringotts and barely any less than his dad scraped together at the Ministry.
“Charlie,” whispered Tonks, “that’s brilliant.”
He looked at her smiling face. He could see she was impressed. He should sign now. It was his dream to play Quidditch professionally, wasn’t it?
“You’ll need to talk it over with your parents, Charlie,” said the calm, reasoned voice of Professor McGonagall. “Perhaps, Mr Bloomsbury, you can leave it with him?”
“I’ve not finished yet,” said the scout. “Miss Tonks, you were quite superb today. I don’t think I’ve seen such flying at your standard for years. I want to offer you a place on the team, too.”
“Oh,” said Tonks in surprise. She looked flustered and tried to sit up, but the pain in her head and shoulder shot through her like a hex. She sank back into her pillows.
“That’s an incredible offer and I’m very flattered but...” she started to say. He interrupted.
“I should have known it; you’ve been approached by someone else, haven’t you? Was it Gilligan from the Kestrals? He’s after another Chaser. Well, he can’t offer you any better than we can, lass.”
“N-no, it’s not another team,” she stuttered. “It’s not what I want to do, Mr Bloomsbury. I intend being an Auror “ as long as my grades are up to it.”
He looked at her for a long time, considering her. “You’ve got guts, Miss Tonks, I’ll give you that. There’s not many would go into that line of work, however good their grades, especially given your background.” He waved a copy of The Prophet in her face.
Tonks heard Professor McGonagall’s sharp intake of breath and saw Charlie react. Hastily, she grabbed his arm. “Perhaps my background is the reason I’ll be successful. Have you ever heard the phrase ‘It takes a thief to catch a thief’, Mr Bloomsbury?”
He chuckled. “I hope you change your mind. Puddlemere could do with someone with your spirit.” He looked at Charlie. “Think on, lad. I’ll give you till the end of this month to make up your mind.” Then he turned round and left.
“Godric, Tonks!” exclaimed Charlie. “Why did you restrain me? I wanted to hit him.”
“And see you get dropped before you’ve even taken off. Don’t be daft, Weasley.” She yawned, suddenly very tired after an eventful day.
“We should leave her, Charlie,” said Professor McGonagall. “She needs her rest. Miss Tonks, before I go, I’d like you to know that I fully intend on dealing with those members of my House who behaved so disgracefully towards you before the match.”
Tonks smiled weakly; it all seemed such a long time ago. “That’s okay, Professor, I always play far better when I’m angry.” She yawned again, struggling to keep her eyes open. “Sorry about Potter’s record.”
“I think, Miss Tonks, under the circumstances, that would have been one record James Potter would have gloried in seeing taken away from him.”
The Professor sighed as she remembered the Chaser that James had been, and then shook her head; it did no good to dwell on these things.
***
Tonks was discharged on Sunday evening to a rapturous reception in the Hufflepuff common room.
“Wow!” she cried, looking at all the food and bottles of Butterbeer lined up on a table. “What’s all this for?”
“Celebration for the Tonks One Hundred!” answered Digby, giving her a rather slobbery peck on the cheek. “Thanks to you, Hufflepuff are currently in the lead for the House Cup.”
“Really?” Tonks replied.
“Yes,” said Aggie. “Professor Dumbledore awarded you fifty points and the team twenty for capturing Potter’s record. We’re now sixty points clear.”
Tonks grinned. She knew it was highly improbable that Hufflepuff would stay at the top of the board, especially given that the Quidditch Cup had yet to be decided, but being top was an amazing feeling.
“Who paid for all this food and Butterbeer?” she said. “Digby, I know how broke you are. Where on earth did you get the money?”
“You, Tonks,” replied Digby, “are a very popular witch all over Hogwarts. The food is courtesy of the kitchens and a house-elf called Frinkle, whereas the Butterbeer...” He paused. “The Butterbeer has been donated by Wood and the Weasley twins. Guess they’re feeling guilty.”
“Wow! Wow! Wow!” exclaimed a very excited Tonks. “Come on, guys, let’s get started.”
***
Next morning, Tonks had to be dragged out of bed by Aggie. The party had extended into the small hours which, now she thought about it, Tonks realised was not a good idea because she had Potions first thing.
Hastily knocking back some tea and toast, she dashed back to the dorm to get her books together. She glanced at the mirror. Her hair was still black as she’d been unable to change it yet. Mindful of Remus’ words, she scraped it back into a ponytail in an attempt to lessen its resemblance to Sirius’ hair. Then she meekly entered the classroom.
“Late again, Miss Tonks,” said Professor Snape coldly. “Five points from Hufflepuff and see me after class.”
She knew it was foolish to argue; she’d witnessed this side of him before although it had been a long time since he’d shown it towards her.
“Sorry, sir,” she muttered, and took her usual seat next to Melody.
There followed an exemplary lesson where they began more complicated antidotes, to lesser known snake venoms. Tonks leant forward so she could capture all the instructions he whispered in his sibilant voice. Keeping her head down, she brewed an almost perfect antidote and took it up to him to be marked. Snape looked at her coldly but accepted the potion. For one minute, as he glanced at her hair, she thought he was going to drop her vial on the floor, but instead he unstopped the bottle and sniffed it.
“Acceptable, Miss Tonks,” he said icily. “Your proposal, however, to brew Wolfsbane, is not.”
“B-but, sir. Professor Snape, please. I’ve done all this research and I don’t have time to look at another Potion,” she said desperately.
“That is not my problem,” he said, and his eyes bored into hers. “You should not have assumed that I would approve “ especially as you were not honest with me about the reasons you wanted to brew it.”
She thought of protesting that she didn’t know what he meant but she knew it was futile. An image of Remus, when she’d first met him, swam to the front of her head and suddenly, there was James lifting her up from Sirius’ chest and Lily looking on fondly.
Snape gasped and looked away suddenly. Remus had told her he’d hated James and Sirius, but she hadn’t realised how bitter he was. There was a long silence. Snape picked up a long, black quill and began marking essays. She decided to leave, but as she got to the door his voice stopped her.
“I was not aware you’d ever met your cousin, Miss Tonks.” he said quietly.
“Once, years ago,” she replied. “My mum told me to keep quiet about it.”
“Your mother is wise. Yet, on Saturday, you sported his hairstyle and shouted his name to the skies. That is not wise.”
She bit her lip knowing that it was vital she keep on good terms with this man. “Professor Snape,” she began. “I was upset by the article inThe Prophet, by the inferences that I would follow in their footsteps and...” she smiled tentatively at him, “I thought it was the best way of annoying the Gryffindors.”
He considered her carefully. “And Lupin?”
“I met him, years ago, at Black’s place. Then, last month, I bumped into him in Hogsmeade. I talked to him about my cousin,” she said earnestly.
“What on earth could you possibly want to know about Black?”
Sorry Sirius, she thought as she looked her Potions Professor straight in the eye.
“I wanted to ask him,” she began, “why Black had betrayed them? It’s not nice coming from a family condemned for dark magic and betrayal. I needed some answers.”
“And Lupin furnished you with the answers?” asked Snape.
“He told me that Black was the Potters’ Secret Keeper and only he could have given away their location to You-know-Who.”
“And your sudden interest in Wolfsbane?” he questioned her. “Does this have anything to do with anyone in particular?”
She hesitated. The truth would stop her proposal dead but an outright lie would not help either.
“I remembered a conversation between Lily Potter and Lupin about werewolves, they thought I was asleep,” she began. “For some reason, it popped into my mind when you gave us the assignment. After all, it is a complicated potion. But, sir,” she hesitated, “I handed in my initial proposal long before I’d met Remus Lupin in Hogsmeade.” She reached into her bag and brought out reams of pages full of notes. “Please, Professor Snape, I really have done a lot of research on this.”
He looked at her face, at the black hair she was so desperately trying to make unrecognisable, and then looked at the pages and pages of notes she’d made. It was rare to find a student so committed “ could he really afford to say no?
“I will allow it,” he said finally, “providing it is brewed under my strict supervision and you are not to take any samples out of the Dungeons.”
She breathed deeply, only then realising quite how tense she’d been.
“Thank you, sir,” she said, and left quickly before he could change his mind.
***
There was another Hogsmeade weekend at the end of January. Tonks decided to go alone. Aggie had invited her to come along with her and Gregor but she didn’t want to play gooseberry. She walked slowly along the path, not wishing to intrude on Oliver Wood and his girlfriend. She smiled to herself. Oliver had been profuse in his apologies, as had Fred and George, and the Gryffindors no longer ignored her. She paused to wave to Hagrid, who was tending his pumpkins.
“Tonks, wait a minute,” said Charlie, who she hadn’t seen standing behind Hagrid. He came over to her. “Do you mind if I walk into Hogsmeade with you? I need to talk to you about something.”
“Er...sure,” she replied nervously, hoping he wasn’t going to ask her out again.
They walked for a while in silence, and then he stopped. “I haven’t given Bloomsbury my answer yet,” he said.
“Oh,” she replied. This was the last thing she thought he’d be talking about. “Why not?”
“I don’t know, Tonks. I’m undecided. I know what a great opportunity it is but...”
“What do your parents think?” she asked.
“They just want me to be happy. They realise what a great opportunity it is and, with the wages, I could really help them out… although Mum’s concerned about injuries.”
“But it’s not what you really want, is it, Charlie?” she asked.
“I thought it was,” he replied. “It’s been my dream for so long. And Puddlemere United “ that’s big time.”
He walked on, kicking stones with his feet and then looked back at her.
“I watched you turn down his offer…” he began.
“Charlie, don’t say this. You’re not turning it down because I won’t be there, are you?” she said in horror.
He laughed. “No, don’t worry, it’s not that. What I was going to say, was that I watched you turn down his offer because you knew it wasn’t what you wanted, and suddenly I found myself wondering if it was what I really wanted to do.”
“But you love Quidditch, Charlie,” she exclaimed.
“Yeah, I do, but what I really love is the flying. I hate the competitive stuff and flying professionally will only increase that,” he said determinedly.
“So what do you want to do?” she asked.
He grinned and looked back at Hagrid.
“Oh my good Godric, Weasley!” she cried. “It’s dragons, isn’t it? You want to work with dragons.”
He laughed loudly. “I knew you’d guess,” he said. “Sometimes, I think you know me better than anyone and that includes Bill. What do you think?”
“It’s brilliant, Charlie. I’m so pleased for you. However, if your mum’s worried about Bludgers, what in the name of Helga Hufflepuff's best nightie is she going to say about dragons?”
End Notes:
Well,she's survived the Bludgers but how about Auror training? And where on earth has Remus gone? Please leave a review.
Chapter 6 - Old Mad-Eye by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
A letter from Charlie, now happily living in Romania, unsettles Tonks. It's not that she doesn't enjoy Auror Training, it's just that she can't get to grips with Stealth and Tracking. Will this be her downfall or can the experience of a battle-scarred Auror help her?
Thank-you very much to Terri (mudbloodproud) and Cassie (ms.leading) for being brilliant betas.
There was a lot of Amy Winehouse going on in the background when I wrote this. I hope Tonks doesn't end up in Rehab.
Just so you know; I'm not JK Rowling but I am obsessed with her characters.
Dear Tonks,
I’m sorry to hear you can’t get time off from training at Christmas. It would have been lovely to have seen you again. I now have Mum, Dad, and my little sister, Ginny, coming over. No doubt Mum will fuss about the burns on my arms “ I’m pleased she didn’t see the scald on my face that you witnessed last August. You’ll be pleased to know I’m getting better at ducking the flames now.
You were right about Harry Potter starting school this year. He was Sorted into Gryffindor “ ha ha “ and not Hufflepuff like you hoped. He’s become very friendly with my youngest brother, Ron, so I might even get to meet him. Mum says everyone was staring at him on Platform 9 ¾, poor kid. I’m glad we thought to remove the pictures of his parents from the Gryffindor notice board, I’m sure he doesn’t need the constant reminders. I gave them to Hagrid to look after as I didn’t want to throw them out.
Ron tells me that Quirrell is now the DADA teacher “ which must mean Dumbledore’s desperate. When I had him for Muggle Studies he showed no aptitude for the hexes or anything. Ron’s not keen on your favourite teacher, Tonks. Professor Snape, according to Ron, is always picking on Harry, and Ron’s become quite protective. I’ve told him that Snape’s always been like that “ although you always seemed to get on with him, and your Outstanding at N.E.W.T. level must have cheered him up for a second or two. Godric, the miserable git didn’t even smile when Slytherin won the Quidditch and House Cups last year. That reminds me, Harry Potter has taken over my position as Seeker for the Gryffindor team. I can’t believe they’ve finally relaxed that first year rule. I know how much it annoyed you, too. Harry must be one hell of a flyer, though. Bet you’re pleased he’s not a Chaser “ your record should stand for a few years yet.
I need to end this letter soon as I’m supposed to be settling in the new dragon hatchlings. For dragons, they really are quite sweet. I daren’t send any pictures to Hagrid or he’ll be asking me to send him an egg!
Before I go, I just wanted to say that I’m sure everything will improve soon. Stealth and Tracking are Moody’s forte, according to my dad, so now he’s your mentor things will pick up. And don’t listen to that idiot, Proudfoot. He was that clever dick Ravenclaw, three years above us, who couldn’t mount a broom properly. You’re worth ten of him, Tonks, so don’t forget it.
Take care and much love
Charlie
Xxx
Tonks sighed as she put down the letter after reading it for the fifth time. She had to admit that Charlie seemed to be enjoying life much more than she was at the moment. She had just finished her three month probationary period at Auror Training and, Merlin, she deserved some fun. A trip to Romania would have been wonderful, especially as the alternative, Christmas Day with her parents, was too depressing to contemplate. Tonks’ parents had been incredibly proud of her N.E.W.Ts and almost burst when she got her acceptance letter from the Auror Department. Tonks, too, had been delighted but as the training got harder she’d found her parents’ persistent questions and undiminished pride irksome. If she failed at this, she wasn’t sure she could bear the disappointment in their faces.
Jacob Proudfoot, she thought, and smiled. She’d forgotten his ineptitude on a broom. She wondered if, perhaps, she should remind him. He was now a fully qualified Auror and his arrogance was unbearable. He mocked her continuously for daring to presume that a witch could become an Auror, forgetting that Alice Longbottom and Marlene McKinnon were among the Aurors that had fallen. She also knew that the old prejudice against Metamorphamagi ran deep with him. He would never admit it in front of any of the senior Aurors, but she’d seen his lip curl disdainfully when she’d been demonstrating her skill in Concealment.
Tonks got up from her desk and walked over to the window. The Magical Maintenance Department had just come back off strike so she was delighted to see some sunshine through the enchanted window instead of the howling storm she’d been subjected to for the last month.
I could ignore Proudfoot, she thought sadly, if only I was actually improving.
Her three month training was to introduce the basics of Auror work. Disguise and Concealment she had, of course, no problems with. Medical Basics she’d easily passed too, thanks in no small part to the excellent teaching of Professor Snape who had drilled her in all the lesser known antidotes and healing potions. Defensive spells and attack procedures had caused her little worry and even Strategy, after a shaky start, had proved to be something she was adept at. Her methods in Strategy class may not have followed the guidelines laid down by Rufus Scrimgeour, but they got the required result. However, there was no denying that her weakness, her big flaw, was Stealth and Tracking.
“How hard can it be to stay upright, Nymphadora?” Edwin Savage had jeered after another attempt at Shadowing him had ended badly. Within the first five minutes, he’d hexed her, sending her to the floor. It had been a particularly nasty hex that stung her wrist, so she’d retaliated and left him with a rather ugly purple boil on his nose. That had at least shut him up for a while, and after she promised to restore his nose to its former glory, Savage had looked at her with something that approached respect “ and best of all he’d stopped calling her Nymphadora.
But her improvement had been minimal in that area and she was now considered such a problem that Scrimgeour, who had been deliberating her continuation with the programme, had decided to give her a second chance if she worked under the supervision of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody.
That morning she’d had her first meeting with him; it had not gone well. She’d been rather terrified, if the truth were known, but had tried to cover it up by helping herself to a cup of tea and accepting a biscuit when he’d offered it.
“First mistake, Nymphadora,” he’d said in his rough, growling voice. “I could have poisoned that biscuit and you didn’t even make a rudimentary check.”
Tonks had spluttered and her mouthful of tea went all over her shirt. Hastily, she’d returned the biscuit to the plate and put her teacup on his desk.
“We have two years to turn you into an Auror and then old ‘Mad-Eye’ is retiring. Don’t waste my time by fretting on your mistakes. Learn from them!” He’d looked across at her with his magical eye that seemed to bore right into her. It was disconcerting but somehow she felt comforted that this man, this legend, was taking her under his auspices. “Do you have anything you want to say to me, Nymphadora?”
“No,” she’d said, hating the fact that her voice was quavering. She swallowed another mouthful of tea. “Except,” she said and gave a nervous smile, “I prefer Tonks to Nymphadora.”
“I’ll stick with Nymphadora,” he said, his tone making it sound like a Ministerial decree.
Today she was sitting at one of the desks in the office (she hadn’t been assigned her own yet) trying to read a book about Tracking. Savage’s words about staying upright whirred around her mind.
Why is it so hard for me? she thought, and was horrified to find tears starting to prickle in her eyes. Furiously, she shook her head then yelped as a pair of hands grabbed her shoulders.
“Couldn’t hear me again, Nymphadora?” Jacob Proudfoot whispered in her ear. “Perhaps you’re thinking about other things.”
“Get lost, Jacob,” she said, gritting her teeth. He swivelled her chair round so that she was facing him.
“Aw, don’t be like that,” he said. “I’ve come to help you.”
“Help me?” she asked in surprise. “Why would you want to do that?”
“Well, Nymphadora,” he said, lowering his voice to a whisper. “Perhaps we could help each other, if you know what I mean.”
The insinuation in his voice was unmistakeable but Tonks decided to ignore it.
“Not really, Jacob. How could you possibly need my help? Unless...” She paused, and then smiled at him. Standing up, she edged closer and looked at him coyly from under her lashes. His breathing became slightly faster. “Unless you need help mounting a broomstick, Proudfoot. You weren’t much good at that at Hogwarts. Unfortunately, it’s an instinctive skill “ difficult to teach.”
His eyes darkened as she moved away from him.
“Agh, get back to your cauldron, you ignorant witch. I could have helped you. I got top grades in Stealth and Tracking and I was willing to give up my free time for tutoring.” The insinuation in his voice returned and he leant in close to her. Tonks recoiled and found herself backed against the desk.
“Why would I need your help? I have Alastor Moody now.”
“That paranoid git!” he said, and laughed nastily. “Suspects everyone and trusts no-one. If I’d known old, ugly bastards were your thing, Nymphadora. I’d have shot a stinging jinx in my face.”
“It would only improve you,” she retorted, aware that her reply was childish.
His hand whipped towards her. She flinched and reached for her wand, but soon realised that it wasn’t his intention to touch her. Instead, he picked up a piece of paper from the desk. It was a letter, Charlie’s letter.
“What do we have here?” he crowed. “A love letter, Nymphadora. You are interested in men, then? Or is Charlie short for Charlotte?”
“Give that back to me,” she said softly. If Proudfoot had known Tonks well, he would have realised that this tone meant she was now a threat to him. “Give that letter back to me now, or I’ll hex you into next week!” She held her wand up to his face.
“You wouldn’t dare,” he said, but his voice was shaking slightly.
“The last time I got really angry, arsehole, the Gryffindor Quidditch team suffered. I think I can take on one barely trained Auror without breaking a sweat ... or even a fingernail,” she said sarcastically.
There was a long pause as he studied her. The hair that she’d recently started keeping an ordinary brown colour in an attempt to be taken seriously was beginning to change. He could see the roots turning red and saw in her eyes a look of fury. Slowly, he held out the letter to her. Without taking her eyes off his face, Tonks took it back from him, and then pushed him away.
“Now leave me alone,” she said. “I have some study to catch up on.”
The silence in the office was broken by the sound of someone clapping.
“Well done,” rasped Mad-Eye Moody, standing in the doorway. “That showed promise.” He looked disdainfully at Proudfoot. “Top marks in Stealth and Tracking, eh? You didn’t hear this old, ugly bastard, did you?”
Proudfoot flushed an unbecoming shade of puce and stomped off to his desk. Moody walked towards Tonks’ desk from the doorway. “Tell me, Nymphadora: what were you so anxious to hide from him? If it’s something sensitive then you shouldn’t be careless enough to leave it lying around.”
She looked down at Charlie’s letter. “There’s nothing sensitive in it, sir. I just didn’t want him reading it,” she explained, handing him the letter.
“This Charlie, is he Arthur Weasley’s son?” he asked as he scanned the bottom of the page.
“Yes, sir. We were good friends at school,” she said.
“Is he your boyfriend?” he asked her bluntly.
“N...no, not at all. We’re just friends.”
“Good. It doesn’t do to get close to people in this job. People let you down, Nymphadora, and the people closest to you will let you down more than most,” he said resentfully.
“Yes, sir,” she said nervously.
“And one last thing. Don’t call me sir, Nymphadora. Call me Moody or Mad-Eye, everyone else does.”
“Yes si...err, Mad-Eye,” she replied, and grinned at him.
He looked at her appraisingly. “Now why don’t you finish up here and go home. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“I’ll just read the end of this chapter,” she said as she showed him the book she’d been studying. Mad-Eye took it from her hand and threw it in a wastepaper basket. She gulped.
“Slinkhard!” he exclaimed. “You won’t learn anything from that windbag. Take it from me: it’s best to learn in the field.”
“I’m not allowed out in the field, though,” she said despondently.
“You are now you’re with me,” he said, winking with his good eye. “Tomorrow morning, six o’clock sharp. See me in Knockturn Alley!”
***
The next day turned out to be the most interesting day Tonks had had since joining the department. Moody, enveloped in a huge hooded cloak, looked more sinister than most of the people frequenting the bars and dodgy shops.
“Borgin and Burkes,” muttered Mad-Eye. “Practically all the Dark wizards in Azkaban frequented that shop in the days Voldemort reigned.”
She winced involuntarily at the sound of the name.
“It doesn’t do to be afraid of a name, Nymphadora,” he continued. “If you shudder at the name then you’ll never cope when he returns.”
“What do you mean ‘when he returns’? I thought a far as the Auror department were concerned he was gone,” she said. There was no fear in her voice, just interest.
“The official Ministry line is that You-Know-Who,” he said in disgust, “the Dark Lord or Voldemort, as I prefer to call him, died at the hands of Harry Potter. But, tell me this: how could a fifteen-month-old boy destroy such a wizard, when not even the likes of Dumbledore could take him down?” He stopped talking for a moment to point to a tavern on the corner, and then began limping towards it. Tonks followed, and, although she wanted to hear more, she realised that Moody would only continue when he wanted to. As she walked inside, she realised this tavern was the one she’d seen Remus go in nearly eighteen months before. She looked round hopefully, but saw no one she recognised.
It was poorly lit inside and the floor was sticky. Tonks could see a layer of grime on the table that Moody sat down at. She grinned to herself as she tried to imagine her mum in a place this unsavoury. She walked up to the bar to order a Butterbeer, but was looked at so strangely by the one-eyed barman that she sat back down. Moody half smiled at her, and then spoke.
“This isn’t a social visit. We’re here to listen to conversations. Besides,” he said as he pulled out a flask from his pocket, “I only ever drink from my own flask.”
“Don’t they mind that you’re not buying?” asked Tonks.
“They know Mad-Eye of old. They have nothing to complain about. I’ve treated them fairly in the past,” he replied grimly.
There was a pause whilst he swigged from his flask. “Voldemort,” he said at last. “His body was never found. Without a body we shouldn’t presume he’s dead. Meanwhile, we need to keep vigilant, Nymphadora. If it’s not Voldemort who returns it will be another. There are still scum aplenty sympathetic to his ideas.”
“Like who?” asked Tonks.
“The ones who escaped Azkaban. The ones feigning the Imperius Curse,” he replied. He looked directly at her and she could see his swivelling eye had stopped rotating and was watching only her. “The Malfoys,” he said. “I believe you are related.”
Tonks was pleased she didn’t have a Butterbeer at this point because she felt sure she would have spluttered it all over Moody. She had been surprised that none of her superiors had mentioned her infamous relatives before now. She strongly suspected that Professor Dumbledore’s recommendation letter had been so supportive of her that they felt it unnecessary.
“Err...yes. I suppose so,” she said after a while. “Narcissa Malfoy is my mother’s sister.”
“And Bellatrix Lestrange is the other and Sirius Black is your cousin,” he said sharply.
Tonks looked at her feet. She knew that a year ago she would have welcomed this conversation as a chance to defend Sirius, but Professor Dumbledore’s words and those of Remus after her accident were still uppermost in her mind. She had to be clever about this.
“I’ve never met my aunts, Mad-Eye,” she replied, looking him in his good eye. “My mum was blasted off the family tree when she eloped with my dad. I’m considered a cursed child, being a Metamorphamagus, and her punishment for disobeying Black family lore.”
“Cursed?” he said. “You have a very useful skill, Nymphadora, so don’t let preposterous prejudices change you. Your hair, for instance...” She looked at him enquiringly. He continued. “You should constantly remind Rufus Scrimgeour of your presence, not hide under this drab brown. Make him see how useful you can be.”
“Oh!” she exclaimed. “I never thought of it like that.” Instantly, she changed her hair to a tomato red and laughed.
“Be discreet, girl,” growled Moody. “I said it was a useful skill, not a party trick.”
After that, they practised Shadowing hags. Tonks felt fairly sure one hag had seen her, but was reasonably pleased with her day’s work. Moody looked, if not happy, at least less stern than yesterday.
“Not bad, Nymphadora,” he said as they Apparated back to the office. She beamed up at him. “But as hags are generally deaf and blind you can’t get complacent.”
Back home that night, Tonks fell, exhausted, into bed. Tomorrow, she thought, tired but happy, I need to send Mum an owl, telling her I’ll be back for Christmas Day.
***
Christmas was a busy time for the Auror Department. Whilst other departments packed up for the festive season they were the ones who dealt with the family feuds that always erupted over the holiday. Most of the time these arguments weren’t sinister but occasionally, after too many Firewhiskys, dark secrets would emerge from a miscreant’s mouth to the horror of their families. Tonks had visited St Mungo’s to take details from a witch whose head had been shrunk by her brother-in-law on Christmas Eve, and was now heading back to see Moody.
“Don’t think there’s anything dark going on, Mad-Eye,” she said as she walked into his office. “In fact, if I were the brother-in-law I think I’d have hexed her long before Christmas Eve.”
Moody didn’t return the grin she gave him but motioned for her to sit down.
“Would you care to join me for a drink, Nymphadora?” he asked. He reached into his desk drawer and produced a bottle of Firewhisky.
Tonks nodded and watched as he unscrewed the top and poured her a generous slug. She picked up the glass, intent on having a sip, when a thought entered her mind. She put the glass up to her eyes and looked through the liquid. Then she produced her wand and began to tap the glass. Nothing happened. Finally, she lifted it to her lips and sipped.
“You’re learning,” said Moody, and there was approval in his voice. “Trust no one, not even your boss.”
“Thank you, Mad-Eye,” she replied and took another sip. Firewhisky, she thought, is definitely an acquired taste.
***
On Christmas Day, Tonks arrived at her parents’ house by Floo just after breakfast. She was laden with gifts for them, this being the first year she’d earned any money.
“Hallo,” she called. “Mum, Dad, where are you?”
“Wotcher, Dora,” said a voice from an armchair in the corner of the sitting room. “Your mum and dad have gone for a walk, so how about you come and give me a hug instead?”
“Nan!” exclaimed Tonks in delight. “How wonderful to see you. I didn’t know you were going to be here.”
“Last minute change of plan, ducks. I’ve been unwell, so Pauline’s running the pub and I’ve landed myself on you lot.”
Tonks ran over to her. She hadn’t seen her grandmother for about six months now and felt horribly guilty about it.
“What’s been wrong with you, Nan? Why didn’t you let me know you were ill?” she asked.
“Touch of flu, love. Nothing serious, but I couldn’t face the pub at this time of year,” she replied. “Besides, after all these years I still can’t get to grips with using an owl. What’s wrong with a letter and stamps, or even the telephone?”
Tonks laughed. Her nan, Shirley King, was a Muggle who ran a thriving pub in the East End of London. Her first husband had been Ted’s dad, but Tonks had never met him because he’d died shortly after Ted had gone to Hogwarts. Shirley had told them how proud he was of his son and how much he would have loved his granddaughter. She’d married again; a man named Jimmy King, had a daughter, and ran a pub with him before he ran off with one of the barmaids. Shirley was battle scarred from men but never bitter. She thought life was a gift to be enjoyed to the full. Tonks loved her very much indeed.
“So what are you doing here, then, Dora?” she asked. “I thought you’d be gallivanting off to Romania with your young man.”
“Who, Charlie?” said Tonks in surprise. “He’s not my young man, Nan. He’s just a mate.”
“Hmmm,” said Shirley. “Isn’t it about time you thought about settling down? I’d quite like some great-grandchildren before I’m too old to enjoy them.”
“Great Gargoyles!” exclaimed Tonks. “Nan, I’m not even nineteen yet. Give me a chance.”
“I was seventeen when I had your dad, Dora. And your mum and dad were married and expecting you at nineteen. Shouldn’t you at least be looking for a sweetheart?”
“Aww, Nan, leave it out,” said Tonks. “I’ve got a career now and that’s all I’m interested in. No time for romance and no interest in any of the men I work with, and they’re the only ones I see these days.”
“I wasn’t thinking about them, dearie,” Shirley replied shrewdly. “I was thinking about one of the boys in that picture you keep in your wallet.”
Tonks blushed. “That’s a photo of my cousin, you know that. That’s the only reason I have it.”
Shirley looked across at her granddaughter and snorted. Tonks knew her nan was simply biding her time until her granddaughter told her the whole story.
“What photo?” said a voice from the hallway. Tonks turned round to see her mum and dad getting out of their cloaks. They walked in and hugged her.
“Oh, you’ve got thin, Nymphadora,” said Andromeda. “You can’t be eating properly.”
“Stop fussing, Mum,” said Tonks, although she had to admit, it was nice to have someone taking care of her again.
“I’m your mother. It’s my job,” replied Andromeda. “Now, what was Shirley saying about a photo? Have you found yourself a boyfriend?”
“No,” Tonks said shortly.
“She carries a photo round in her wallet, dearie,” said Shirley. “She says it’s because her cousin’s in the picture.” She laughed out loud, and then stopped as she became aware of the silence that descended on the room. Ted sat on the arm of the chair with his mum and motioned for her to keep silent.
“Show me the photo,” Andromeda said softly.
“Not if you’re going to destroy it, Mother,” replied Tonks, equally softly.
“I won’t destroy it,” said Andromeda. “But I do want to see it.”
Carefully, Tonks removed the photograph from her wallet. Sirius’ face laughed out at her and she could see Remus grinning right at the camera. She held it out to Andromeda but wouldn’t let her hold it.
“I’ve never seen this,” said Andromeda. “Who gave it to you?”
“One of Sirius’ friends,” muttered Tonks.
“Well, James Potter and Peter Pettigrew are both dead so that only leaves the Lupin boy,” said Andromeda. “How do you know him?”
Tonks took a deep breath and concentrated with all her might on keeping her hair an even colour. Andromeda could always tell when she was lying.
“I saw him in Hogsmeade last Christmas. I recognised him from that night I spent at Sirius’ flat all those years ago.”
“And he just happened to have this photo on him?” Andromeda asked sarcastically.
“No,” said Tonks. “He came to Hogwarts about two weeks later and saw me play in that Quidditch match “ the one where I got the record.” She turned to look at her dad for reassurance but he had his eyes fixed firmly on his wife. There was a long silence.
“Why did you want to speak to Lupin, Nymphadora?” her mother finally asked.
“Because you won’t, Mum!” she cried. “I need to talk about Sirius. I need answers and you won’t talk about him at all.”
Andromeda gazed at her daughter with suspicion, as if she knew she wasn’t getting the whole truth, but soon her expression softened.
“Come with me,” she said in a kinder voice as she walked out of the room.
Andromeda led Tonks into her and Ted’s bedroom, and then walked across to her wardrobe. On the top shelf she took down a small wooden box. She placed it on the bed and motioned for Tonks to sit with her.
“I didn’t destroy anything,” she said, and there were tears in her eyes. “I couldn’t bear to, so I locked away all the photographs, hoping that I could lock away my memories too.”
She opened the box and Tonks could see it was filled with photos and letters.
“For a while,” continued her mother, “I succeeded in forgetting him, but as you’ve got older it’s been harder.”
“Why?” asked Tonks.
“Because, my dear, you are very like him. I don’t mean looks. In looks, you’re a Tonks, but your character is so like his. You’re strong, wilful and so very brave. It hurts sometimes to see how alike you are,” she said.
“Why does that hurt, Mum?”
Andromeda laughed bitterly. “Because he’s in Azkaban having betrayed his friends, and I couldn’t bear it if you followed his path.”
Tonks picked up one of the photos. It showed a much younger Sirius, aged about two, with Regulus and their three cousins. Sirius was squirming on Andromeda’s knee whilst Bellatrix was holding Regulus up for the camera and making him laugh.
“Mum, do you really think that boy in the picture was capable of all those dreadful things?”
Andromeda looked at the picture carefully and ran her finger over the faces of herself and Sirius.
“Why not? After all, the girl holding Regulus did far worse to serve her master. And the little baby became a Death Eater too.”
“So why do you keep all these photographs?” whispered Tonks.
“Because, Nymphadora, there is still a small part of me that desperately hopes the world is wrong and believes Sirius Black is an innocent man.”
At that moment Tonks saw her mother begin to cry. It was like a dam had burst as ten years of tears flowed from Andromeda. Tonks leant over and held her mum close. She held her until her cries had subsided.
“Hey,” said Ted Tonks from the doorway, “What’s going on with my two best girls?”
“Nothing, Dad,” said Tonks as she wiped away a tear from her cheek. “We’re fine now.”
Andromeda looked up at her daughter and then to her husband. Her face was swollen and blotchy from crying but she was smiling. Tonks realised her mother felt released from everything she’d bottled up for years.
“Ted, love, can you start the lunch for me, please? Shirley must be starving. I need a few more minutes up here with Nymphadora.”
Ted looked from her face to the box of photos on the bed, and then finally at his daughter, whose eyes were glistening with tears.
“Right you are, ‘Dromeda,” he replied. “Come down when you’re ready. I’ll keep Mum amused by showing her how I cook turkey with only my wand.”
“Oh dear,” murmured Andromeda to Tonks, “I think the turkey will be burnt this year.”
“You can go downstairs if you want, Mum,” said Tonks. “I’ll stay here awhile and look through these.”
“No,” replied Andromeda, sighing. “I’ve shut you away from these memories for far too long. I think it’s about time we talked.”
End Notes:
Oh! Oh! Oh! No Remus in this chapter...so I hope you still enjoyed it. Please leave a review.
Chapter 7 - Damsel in Distress by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Visiting Charlie in Romania, Tonks foolishly decides to rescue a baby dragon. Facing its angry mother, she becomes trapped in the enclosure. What she needs is a modern-day St George to rescue her...
Thank you to Terri (mudbloodproud) and cassie (ms leading) for being amazing betas.
This chapter was written under the influence of flu and Amy Winehouse - again.
Incase you're confused - I'm not JK Rowling but I do love her world.
Wotcher, Nan,
I’m having a wonderful time here in Romania. I was so lucky to be able to get a week off work. I met up with Charlie three days ago and we’ve been hiking around the area like Muggles. It’s been a lot of fun. Charlie is hopeless without magic. Tomorrow, he has to return to work but I’m going to stay in a nearby pub and maybe help out. Charlie doesn’t want me to, though. He thinks I’m a walking “ or rather - tripping “ disaster area and near the creatures he looks after, it could be fatal. I so wish I could show you this place, Nan, as you’d love it, but no Muggles allowed, unfortunately “ not even one as wonderful as you.
Love, Dora.
Xxx
Tonks licked the envelope and sealed it shut. Charlie watched curiously as she put her hand into her bag and pulled out a small book containing stickers. She licked one and then placed it on the envelope.
“Explain, again, why you’re not using an owl?” he asked.
“Nan doesn’t like them,” she replied. “Besides, she runs a pub in the East end of London and owls turning up with letters attached to their legs could be awkward... Although,” she mused, “a pigeon wouldn’t be a problem.”
“I notice you don’t mind calling yourself Dora to your nan, Nymphadora,” Charlie said cheekily.
Tonks pulled a face and punched him on the shoulder. “My nan is probably the only person in the world that can get away with it, okay, Weasley. Even my mum and dad get moaned at. For my nan, though, there’s only one Tonks and that was my granddad!”
She stood up from the grassy bank where they’d been sitting and offered him her hand. Charlie accepted and she pulled him up. Together they walked towards the pub where she’d found herself a room. It was about a mile from the dragon reserve and frequented by many of the dragon handlers. Charlie was well known to the proprietress “ a rather buxom witch in her fifties, with dark brown hair, called Catalina. She reminded Tonks of Rosmerta but while Rosmerta was friendly to all her customers, Catalina reserved her smiles for the handsome young men who bought drinks.
“What do you want to drink?” Charlie said as they walked through the door.
“Anything cold, please,” Tonks replied. She sat down at a table and waited for him to return. At the bar, Charlie was waylaid by a young witch, also with dark brown hair, who began talking to him. She cast curious glances at Tonks and was obviously asking Charlie who his companion was.
“I’ll introduce you, Alexa,” she heard Charlie reply and, picking up the drinks from the bar, he walked over to the table.
“Tonks, this is Alexandreina, Catalina’s daughter. She works with me at the reserve. Alexa, this is Nymphadora Tonks, a mate from school,” he said as he pulled out a chair for Alexa to sit on.
“Nymphadora, that is an unusual name,” said Alexa.
“Oh, call me Tonks,” she replied. “I hate my first name.”
Alexandreina wrinkled her nose as if to say she didn’t blame her, and then started speaking. “I like my name, but will admit it does fill the mouth.” She paused as Charlie grinned at her. “What did I say?”
“Mouthful, Alexa. You mean your name is a mouthful,” he said, laughing.
She shrugged. “Is the same thing, I think? So, Tonks,” she began, and Tonks could feel her put emphasis on her nickname as if she found it distasteful, “what do you think of the dragon reserve?”
“I haven’t been near it... yet. I came last year but I haven’t seen the new hatchlings,” Tonks replied as she took a swig of her juice. “Charlie won’t let me near them.”
“Oh, he is so protective,” said Alexa, “but there’s nothing to be scared of.”
“I’m not scared,” said Tonks, bristling. Her hair began to change to the blueish hue it turned when she was angry or unsure of someone. Alexa’s eyes widened and Charlie hurriedly interrupted.
“I’m more scared for the dragons,” he said. “Tonks is a formidable witch and you don’t want to get on the wrong side of her.”
Alexa looked from Tonks to Charlie in disbelief.
“You should have seen what she did to the Gryffindor Quidditch team,” said Charlie, laughing. “I don’t think Oliver’s recovered yet.”
There was a silence. Tonks could feel her hair returning to the blonde she had been sporting before the blue.
“Your hair,” said Alexa, at last. Tonks smiled because the girl’s comment suddenly took her back to Hogwarts, where Professor Snape had voiced his objections to her hair colour.
“I’m a Metamorphamagus,” she replied, smiling. She screwed up her face and began to turn her hair brown, then pink, altering the style and the length. Charlie laughed, but she noticed that Alexa and her mother, who had approached the table to collect glasses, were not smiling.
“Fatal,” she thought she heard Catalina mutter under her breath.
“Sorry,” she said and blushed. “I didn’t realise there was a problem.” She screwed her face up once more and returned her hair to the blonde colour she’d walked in with. Catalina scowled and walked off. Alexa muttered something, and then stood up.
“Charlie, I have to go back. Are you coming? I’m sure your mate will be fine here by herself.”
“I’m not due back until tomorrow,” Charlie replied. “I’ll stay with Tonks for a bit. Catch you later, perhaps?”
She gave him a smile and then, giving Tonks a cursory nod, she left.
“Sorry about that,” said Charlie. “I should have warned you. They’re a superstitious bunch in this area.”
“Mmm, so I gathered,” said Tonks bitterly. “Any of them got Black blood in them?”
“Still rankles, does it?” Charlie said, sighing. He reached over and took her hand, oblivious to the glares Catalina was casting their way from the bar.
“Sometimes,” she replied and squeezed his hand back. “It’s not just my mother’s family, though. I’ve seen it throughout the Ministry. Proudfoot, for instance, never stops sneering.”
“Proudfoot’s an arse, Tonks. You know that,” Charlie said reassuringly. He lifted his hand to her head and began stroking her hair.
She blinked at him and then moved her head away. “Get off me, Weasley,” she said jokingly. “I don’t think your girlfriend’s mother is very pleased.”
“Girlfriend?” Charlie said in astonishment. “What are you on about?”
“Alexandreina, or whatever she calls herself. She fancies you, Charlie,” replied Tonks. “Merlin, how could you not know that?”
“Oh,” said Charlie, smiling.
“Why did Catalina say I was ‘fatal’, by the way? Tonks asked. “Am I fatally attractive or something?”
“Ah, you heard that,” said Charlie awkwardly. “Fatal can mean deadly, but I’m pretty sure Catalina meant...”
“Tell me,” Tonks urged.
“Err, ‘weird’, actually. I told you, she’s superstitious. Don’t let it worry you,” he said dismissively.
“I’m not at all worried, Weasley. I might have a bit of fun though,” she replied. She walked up to the bar to get some more drinks. Catalina eyed her suspiciously; Tonks turned her head round to Charlie, winked at him and then turned her hair as red as his. Catalina scowled.
“You, Nymphadora, can’t keep away from trouble, can you?” whispered Charlie as she returned back to the table.
“Thought I might get better service, Weasley, if she thought I was male,” replied Tonks, giggling.
***
After another drink, Charlie reluctantly returned to the dragon reserve to unpack, leaving Tonks to settle in at the pub. They agreed to meet up later as Charlie was anxious for her to see a nearby lake where he swam with his friends.
“We’ll take some food and some of the local wine, if you’d like,” he’d suggested before he left.
“Yeah, cool, Charlie,” she replied. “Look, why don’t you invite some of your friends, too? Perhaps Alexa would like to join us.”
“Are you sure?” Charlie had asked. “She wasn’t exactly polite to you, Tonks.”
“Mmm, and she’ll be even ruder if she thinks there’s something going on with us, won’t she? I’d like to see the dragons again and it would be good if she was friendly and not trying to shove me in front of them.”
It was a hot day and the night was not much cooler. Charlie arrived at her room after his visit to the dragon reserve, just as she was packing a costume, towel, and a book.
“Why are you bringing a book?” he asked scornfully. “Am I not entertaining enough for you?”
“You might be otherwise occupied, Charlie,” she said slyly. “Besides, I have to read this stuff.” She held it up and he could see the title: Venom and Antidotes.
“You do enjoy the training, don’t you, Tonks?” he asked, suddenly anxious.
Tonks paused, wondering whether she should tell him what she’d been trying to ignore since she came to Romania. “I love it, Charlie,” she enthused. “I love being out in the field with Moody. He’s a brilliant teacher, you know.”
“What about Stealth and Tracking? Has that got any easier?” he asked gently and she could tell he wasn’t fooled by her tone.
“I’ve improved, if that’s what you mean,” she replied shortly, and then relented. “Actually, I’m still pretty useless, as you can imagine. But Moody has faith.”
“So do I,” said Charlie and he tweaked a lock of her hair, now bright pink. He held out his hand and she accepted it, gratefully as they walked downstairs.
There was no sign of Alexa or Catalina as they entered the pub.
“Busy,” the barman replied dully to Charlie’s question. “Madam Catalina is preparing rooms for new guests.”
“Oh, okay,” replied Charlie. “Look, Josef, if you see Alexa, can you tell her we’re up at the lake and she’s welcome to join us?”
“How far is this lake?” asked Tonks as they stepped outside. There was a faint breeze in her hair, a welcome relief to the punishing heat of the day. She could see the sun setting in the distance and somewhere high above a crescent moon was beginning to appear. Not full, tonight, Remus, she thought to herself and then turned back to Charlie who’d been speaking. “Sorry, I missed that. What did you say?”
“I said it’s about two miles, but we could Apparate, if you’d rather,” repeated Charlie.
“Isn’t that a bit risky with Muggles close by?” said Tonks.
“Not really,” replied Charlie. “They think the place is haunted. I told you, they’re a superstitious bunch here.”
“Haunted by what?” she asked carelessly.
“Oh, the usual,” Charlie replied. “Ghosts, ghouls, vampires, and werewolves, I guess.”
“Werewolves!” exclaimed Tonks. “Are there werewolves here?”
“Nah, ‘course not. The wizards have kept alive the rumours so that the Muggles keep away. It gives us a chance to relax by the lake. You don’t seriously think I’d take you anywhere near a werewolf colony, do you, Tonks?” He stopped near a path that led through a small wood. “We can Apparate here. Come here, and I’ll take you by Side-Along-Apparition.”
Tonks gazed again at the moon. It had been eighteen months since she’d seen Remus, and she honestly could not think of a day when he hadn’t flitted into her mind. Every night, when she saw the moon, she imagined him under it, and during the day, at work, a comment about Hogwarts or Quidditch would send her mind careering back to the last time she seen him.
“Tonks,” Charlie’s voice broke into her thoughts. “Come on, take my hand.”
“Err, yeah, sure, Weasley,” she replied as she walked over to join him.
They Apparated to a lonely spot beyond the wood and walked up a path to the lake. The sun was setting over the water and Tonks was awestruck at the beauty of the scene in this desolate place. Charlie took her hand and led her down some steps carved out in the bank. Together they sat, companionably, and shared pumpkin pasties and wine.
“This is beautiful, Charlie,” Tonks said as she lay back on the dry grass. “Thank you for bringing me here. Why didn’t you show me this last year?”
“It was out of bounds, don’t you remember? There was some sort of Muggle water sports thing going on and we kept out the way,” Charlie replied as he rooted around in the picnic basket she packed. “Aww, Tonks, you haven’t brought much food with you. Pumpkin pasties and apples, is that it? I know you have the appetite of a pygmy puff but I’m a working man now.”
“Sorry,” she replied. “I guess I got distracted when I was packing it. Anyway, you’ve not been working this week.”
“Mmm, but I have to keep my strength up for tomorrow,” he grumbled. His stomach rumbled loudly. “I can’t drink all that wine on an empty stomach.”
“Is a good job I bring you something more substantial then, eh, Charlie?” said a voice from the shadows. Alexa appeared before them carrying a large bag. “Sandwiches, for the working man,” she said as she tossed a packet in front of them both.
“Alexa, you are a star!” cried Charlie as he tore open the packet.
Tonks grinned. “Way to a Weasley’s heart is through his stomach,” she muttered.
Alexa looked at her and whispered, “Are you interested in his heart?”
“No, Alexa,” Tonks whispered back, laughing as Charlie devoured the food Alexa had prepared, completely oblivious to the girls’ conversation. “I’m not interested in his heart. He’s a mate, okay.”
“Mate?” asked Alexa, her body stiffening. “It means a couple, yes? Making babies and things.”
“Merlin, no!” cried Tonks, still laughing. “That’s not what I meant at all. He’s a friend, that’s all.”
It seemed that Alexa finally understood what Tonks had been trying to tell her, for she smiled warmly and helped herself to a glass of wine.
“To mates,” she said and clinked her glass with Tonks’.
“What kept you, Alexa?” Charlie asked at last as he finished the last sandwich. “You weren’t in the pub.”
“I was working,” she replied. “Some new people turned up and I had to show them round.”
“Any good?” Charlie asked. “Do you think they’ll stick around?” He turned to Tonks. “We get students turning up all enthusiastic about working with dragons, but after a few days they leave, when they realise it’s a lot of work.”
“They might,” replied Alexa. She picked up an apple and began to bite into it, losing interest in the new recruits. “Are we swimming?”
“Yeah, why not?” replied Charlie. He began taking his shirt and trousers off, revealing trunks he’d put on underneath. Tonks could see he’d filled out considerably since she’d last seen him. The Seeker build had gone and he looked far more like a Keeper or Beater now. She saw Alexa eyeing him with interest.
“Err, you two go ahead. I don’t fancy it at the moment,” she said and smirked at Charlie. He raised his eyebrows at her, but she picked up her book and waved it in front of his face. The pair of them raced for the water. She could hear Charlie’s yells and Alexa’s shrieks as they splashed in the shallows. It struck her powerfully, then, how lonely she was. She had Charlie’s friendship, that was true, but it was a long distance friendship at best. Aggie was now married and expecting her first child. Tonks had been popular at school but hadn’t let herself get close to anyone, except for Charlie and Aggie. And now, at Auror training, she was so concentrated on her studies that she didn’t socialise with any of the others. Although, she mused, if that means getting on with Proudfoot, I’d rather be lonely.
“Charlie,” she shouted, “I’m going back.”
“What?” he shouted from the lake. “Tonks, are you okay?”
“Yeah, bit tired, that’s all,” Tonks replied. “Don’t worry about me, I can get back myself.” She picked up her bag and put her book in it. “I’ll leave the wine,” she added as she started to walk up the path.
“Tonks, wait,” said Charlie. He had run up from the lake to her. “Come on, stay a bit longer.”
“I really am tired, Charlie. I think I had too much sun and could do with a good sleep. Look,” she said and patted his cheek, “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay. I’ll come up to the reserve and you can show me around.”
“Okay,” Charlie said uncertainly, and then gazed back at Alexa who was watching them both. “If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure,” she replied. “Have fun. Bye, Alexa,” she called to the Romanian girl who had started to walk towards them.
Quickly, before Charlie could half-heartedly protest again, she strode to the edge of the forest and then waved before she Apparated. She landed, not outside the pub, but near the reserve as she’d intended. Although not as obsessed with dragons as Charlie was, Tonks had always been fascinated by them. It was one of the interests they shared. She wanted some time alone watching the new hatchlings.
As she approached the front gate, she changed her hair and face to an approximation of Alexa’s. It worked; the guard waved her through with barely a glance. Then, changing back, she headed for one of the enclosures near the edge and settled down to watch as the dragon babies began flapping their wings, demanding food from their mothers. She looked through the enchanted cages and saw that one little dragon, much smaller than the others, had fallen out of his nest. His mother was not around and he was trying to climb back in to the nest with his brothers and sisters. But dragons were ruthless from a young age, and his bigger siblings, realising there’d be more food without the runt, kept him out. Tonks’ heart melted. Always on the side of the underdog, she unlocked the cage with her wand. Letting herself in, she bent down to pick up the tiny dragon. The dragon looked up at her and she swore it smiled, if dragons could smile. She placed him back in the nest, then realised her mistake.
The dragon’s siblings turned on her. One bit her, and she cried out in pain. Then she heard a roar as the mother dragon, alerted by her children’s cries, returned and faced her ferociously. Its dark orange eyes glared at her with rage, and then the dragon opened its mouth showing sharp teeth. Tonks started to back away slowly, wondering if she could fire the Conjunctivitis Curse quick enough to ward off the fire that would soon be directed at her. She raised her wand, but the bite on her hand had begun to swell and she realised that her aim would be affected. There was now nothing she could do except run and duck. The dragon lifted its head, opened its mouth, and began to roar.
Before she could yell, Tonks felt someone rush into her and tackle her to the ground. Barely inches above was her a ball of flame. Her rescuer pulled her up and behind a wall, and then held her down.
“Multumesc,” she said faintly, pleased Charlie had taught her the word for ‘thank you’.
“That accent really is appalling, Tonks,” hissed a familiar voice. “And I suggest next time you want a moonlit stroll, you try to avoid dragons!”
She gazed up into a face she hadn’t seen for eighteen months and felt her heart thump loudly in her chest.
“Remus,” she breathed. “What on earth are you doing here?”
“Getting you out of trouble, it looks like,” he said grimly. “Have you got your wand?”
“Yeah, but I can’t use it very well, one of those little gits bit me on my wand hand,” she whispered.
“Okay, hold on and I’ll Apparate us out of here,” he said as he slid his arm around her waist. Standing up quickly, now in sight of the mother dragon, he turned them both on the spot and they Disapparated to outside the reserve. Tonks collapsed on the grass and let out a huge cry of relief. She wasn’t sure whether her breathing was faster because of the adrenaline coursing through her veins or because Remus Lupin, the man she’d been unable to forget, was kneeling beside her. He took her hand and she felt her heart skip a beat. Was he about to kiss her? she thought wildly. But instead he turned her palm over and examined the bite.
“What the bloody hell were you doing in there, by yourself?” he said, sounding angry now.
“Trying to save a dragon,” Tonks mumbled, feeling stupid. Then she rallied, “I could ask you the same question.”
“As of today, Tonks, I work here,” he said. He touched the bite gently. “Does it hurt?”
“A bit,” she said and shuddered as he touched it again.
“Stoicism is all very well, Tonks, but if it hurts then yell your head off,” he said shortly. “Look, I’ve got an antidote to this back in my room. If we alert the Healers tonight, you’ll end up in trouble for trespassing.”
He stood up and she tried to join him but something was making her feel very strange. She could see him spinning around her as she attempted to get to her feet.
“Okay, Tonks,” she could hear him say through a haze of pain. “The venom’s spreading. I’m going to get it out.” He picked up her hand and she could see it was now double its normal size; he lifted it to his mouth and began to suck at the wound.
After a while she felt the pain start to drain away. She tapped Remus on the arm and he ceased. “Better?” he asked as he looked at her face.
“Yeah, a bit. Where did you learn that? I don’t remember reading that in my book,” she mumbled, aware that she was starting to sound delirious.
“Old Muggle remedy, Tonks. But it’s only temporary,” he replied as he scooped her into his arms. “I’ll get you back to the local pub and take a proper look.”
“Oh, are you staying there, too?” she asked. She felt her head begin to spin and then she passed out.
When she came around, Remus was carrying her into his room. He laid her on his bed then rummaged in a half unpacked, shabby-looking case. She tried to sit up but still felt woozy.
“Don’t sit up,” he said. “Stay still until I get this prepared.”
Tonks obeyed him and lay her head back on the pillows. The pain in her hand, which had receded when he’d sucked some of the venom out, was beginning to return and she felt nauseous. Remus stood up and began to mix some ingredients with a small pestle and mortar. He looked across at her. “You look very pale,” he said with concern. “Is the pain worse? Don’t lie this time.”
“It’s not great,” she said through gritted teeth. “And I feel a bit sick.”
Remus conjured a glass and some water and brought it over. He sat on the side of the bed and slid his arm around to help her sit up. “Sip this slowly,” he said gently. “The antidote will be ready soon.”
He returned to the bowl and began pounding the ingredients. When he’d finished he came back to her side. Remus took her injured hand. “This is going to hurt, Tonks, but it will draw the poison out. Dragon hatchlings have remarkably strong venom because they can’t breathe fire for the first few months.” He applied a yellow paste to the bite. Tonks felt an immediate stinging sensation and then a sharp stabbing pain as the venom began to leave her system. She cursed under her breath, and then apologised. Remus laughed.
“You can curse all you want, Tonks. I’ve heard and used all those words before,” he said ruefully.
“Really,” she replied, talking to take her mind off the pain. “I can’t imagine you saying anything stronger that ‘Merlin’s pants’.”
“Hmm,” he muttered. “Well, you haven’t seen me go through a transformation, have you? Then you’d hear me curse.”
“Sorry,” she mumbled, turning her face away from him. “I didn’t think.”
There was a long silence and then Remus picked her hand up and began examining the bite. “I find it astonishing,” he said calmly, “that it’s not the first thing you think about me whenever we meet.” Tonks looked at him with a puzzled expression on her face. “You don’t automatically think ‘werewolf’ when you see me, do you?”
“No, of course not,” Tonks replied. “Why, is that what people do?”
He shrugged. “Once they know, it’s hard for people to keep the fear out of their eyes.”
“Not Sirius,” she said confidently. “He wouldn’t have feared you.”
“No, not Sirius, James, or Peter. But I think that’s because they found out when they were young and very reckless. Sirius, of course, never stopped being reckless. He took delight in my...” He trailed off and Tonks had the feeling he’d stopped himself from saying something important.
“He took delight in what?” she asked. “You transforming?”
Remus blinked, and she had the feeling he was thinking rapidly. “No, not in my transforming, that would be ridiculous. He liked having a friend who was different, that’s all.”
Tonks looked at him sceptically, but realised the subject was closed ... for now.
“You didn’t seem surprised to see me,” she said. “You’ve not asked why I’m in Romania or anything.”
“Oh, I’d heard you were here, that’s why,” Remus replied. “Or rather, I overheard a conversation between two of the dragon handlers about Charlie Weasley and a girlfriend who had hair that changed colour.” He paused and began to apply a dressing to her hand. “I’m pleased you two made up, anyway,” he said, sounding slightly too hearty. “Where is he though? He should have been with you in that enclosure.”
Tonks laughed. “He’s currently playing around with one of the lady dragon handlers by the lake. It’s been a common mistake. Charlie referred to me as his mate, and they all thought we were a breeding pair or something.” She giggled. “I left them to it.”
“And it doesn’t bother you that he’s seeing someone else?” Remus asked casually.
“No, not at all. Why should it?” replied Tonks. “Charlie’s always been a mate. The most stupid thing I ever did was to go out with him. I nearly lost him for good.”
“Oh, I don’t know, Tonks. I think stealing Potion ingredients to brew Veritaserum could be classed as stupid. You could have been expelled,” Remus said slyly.
Tonks had a childish urge to poke her tongue out at him, but she grinned. “And that secret passage, in Honeydukes cellar, I expect Professor McGonagall told you about it did she, Mr Perfect?”
“Touche,” he said, laughing. He stood up and began repacking his case. “How’s the hand now?”
“Much better, thank you,” Tonks replied as she swung her legs off the bed.
“In that case, would you like to join me for a late supper? I’m sure Catalina will bring something up here, if we ask nicely,” he said and started walking to the door.
“I’d love to,” Tonks replied, “but I think you’d better ask Catalina; she’s not my biggest fan.” Remus looked puzzled. “She doesn’t trust me because of this,” Tonks explained and began to change her hair.
Catalina told Remus she would be delighted to bring some food and a bottle of wine. Tonks could hear them talking in the bar and was amused at Catalina’s suggestion that she bring up two glasses with the wine. Oblivious to the lasciviousness in her voice, Remus agreed and sauntered back to his room.
“You do realise, Remus, that Catalina...” Tonks words were interrupted by a knock at the door. Without waiting for a reply, Catalina walked in carrying a tray bearing a tureen of piping hot soup, one bowl, some bread, and a bottle of wine with two glasses. She’d taken a few moments to reapply her make-up and spray herself with rather overpowering perfume.
“I bring your wine, Mr Lupin, and some food, yes. Shall I open it for you, and pour us...?” She stopped suddenly as she caught sight of Tonks lying on the bed. If she could have spat at her without Remus seeing, Tonks had no doubt she would have done.
“Oh, this is so good of you, Catalina,” said Tonks, and then added with a slight hint of mischief in her voice, “Isn’t it wonderful to have room service, Remus?”
Catalina muttered something under her breath and scowled fiercely at Tonks, who smiled.
Looking puzzled, Remus stood up to take the tray from Catalina. “Yes, thank you very much,” he said, and placing the tray on top of the chest of drawers, he showed her out of the room. Turning back to Tonks, he looked perplexed. “Why did she scowl at you?”
“Remus, please,” she said, giggling. “You don’t think she slapped all that make up on for my benefit, do you?”
“What, you mean...? You think...?” Remus reddened as the realisation that Catalina had come up here for another reason sank in. “Oh,” he said, sighing. “Thank Merlin you were here. Your name will be mud, though.”
“I think it already is,” she replied. “I told you, she’s not keen on ‘weird’ witches like me.”
“Does that bother you?” Remus asked curiously.
She considered his question. “In a place like this, no, I can’t say it does, but...” She stopped and then sighed. “It annoys the hell out of me that some in the Ministry still view me with suspicion or, even worse, derision.”
“I can’t imagine anyone deriding you for long, Tonks,” said Remus seriously. “I doubt you’d give them the chance.”
She smiled gratefully as Remus brought her a bowl of soup and some bread. Tonks took the bowl in one hand and then picked up the spoon in her injured hand. She winced and dropped the spoon.
“Sorry,” said Remus. “I should have realised your hand isn’t really up to holding cutlery. Is it still very painful?”
“A bit,” she admitted. “I’ll just dip bread in and eat that way, I think.” She looked at her thumb. “It really is much better than it was; you’re obviously skilled at Potions and things.”
Remus levitated the tureen over to a small bedside table, and then started to pour the wine. “I would have liked to have been a Healer,” he said after a while, then added quietly, “But that wasn’t going to happen.”
“What do you do, then?” Tonks asked. “Sorry, is that rude? I just wonder what you do with yourself and why you left England. You said it had something to do with Dumbledore?”
He sat down on the other side of the bed and handed her a glass of wine. “I’ve been travelling across Europe,” he said after a while. “Doing jobs here and there, bar work, manual labour “ that’s what I’m doing at the dragon settlement.”
“And Dumbledore?” she asked again.
“It’s complicated,” he said as he helped himself to more bread. “Part research, part reconnaissance, part something to keep me occupied.”
“Reconnaissance?” she questioned.
“Tell me, Tonks,” he said when he’d finished his mouthful, “what is the official line at the Auror department, regarding Voldemort?”
She spluttered at the unexpected question. “Err, well, the official line is that You-Know-Who has gone... But,” she peeped at him from beneath her lashes, “I have Alastor Moody mentoring me, and he reckons Vol “” she stopped and shook her head ““ sorry, I can’t say it. He reckons You-Know-Who will return.”
“Well, that’s what Dumbledore believes and what I believe, so I’m sort of like a spy, gathering information on dark wizards.” He finished his soup and placed the bowl on the floor. “Old Mad-Eye, eh?” replied Remus. “Well, you couldn’t be in better hands. Does he still shout ‘Constant Vigilance’ all the time?”
She grinned. “Yeah, he still does that. How do you know him?”
“I worked with him during the war. He’s an excellent Auror,” Remus replied. He picked up the bottle of wine and offered her another glass. Tonks shook her head and went back to her soup. “You look tired,” Remus said. “Perhaps you should go to bed.”
“I’m fine,” she said and then yawned. “Oh, perhaps you’re right. I’d better sneak out quietly or Madam Catalina will be calling on you.”
He pulled a face at her. “You’re incorrigible, Tonks.” He helped her up off the bed and had another look at her thumb. The swelling appeared to be going down. “Come on, I’ll walk you back.”
“I can find my own way, Remus. Don’t bother,” she replied.
“Knowing you, you’ll find your own way back via the dragon enclosure,” he replied. She swayed a little and he put his arm round her waist. “You’re still unsteady.”
“Mmm,” Tonks said, “I do feel a bit woozy still. I must have stood up too quickly.”
Strengthening his hold on her, Remus walked her slowly back to her room. He opened the door and helped her into her room.
“You’re very pale again,” Remus said with concern in his voice. “I think you need a good night’s sleep. I’ll come and change that dressing in the morning before I go to work.”
“Yeah, I will,” she replied. He began to walk out of the room. “Remus,” she said, “Thanks for everything. I could have been in a lot of trouble tonight, couldn’t I?”
He smiled. “It must be my St George complex.” Tonks looked puzzled. “Saving the maiden from the fire breathing dragon,” he explained. Tonks yawned again. “I’ll leave you to get some sleep. “ He took a sweeping bow. “Goodnight, fair damsel.”
Tonks laughed and half curtseyed. “Goodnight, St George.”
After he’d left, Tonks lay in her bed and thought over the evening’s events. Meeting Remus again felt unbelievably good and she smiled to herself as she ran over the conversation they’d had tonight. She turned on one side and fell asleep with a smile on her face. However, her hopes for sweet dreams were wrecked once more by dreams of Sirius in Azkaban. She had been visited by these dreams more frequently of late, but this was the most vivid she’d had. She dreamt of Sirius blasting away Peter Pettigrew, saw Mad-Eye dragging him away whilst he laughed maniacally, and then saw him in Azkaban with Bellatrix, the Dementors leaning over to give him the kiss.
“Nooo!” she shrieked. “Merlin, no. Not that!” She sat up in bed. She was sweating with fear and wondered if anyone had overheard her screams. She looked at the clock. It was five o’clock in the morning. Deciding that she wouldn’t get back to sleep now, Tonks levered herself out of bed and found her bag. Pulling on some jeans and a T-shirt, she let herself out of her room and the pub and Apparated to the lake. She took off her shoes and jeans and walked into the lake, hoping the cool water would numb the pain in her hand and calm her thoughts. She didn’t know how long she swam but when grey light of dawn started to give way to the brighter hues of daylight, she swam back to shore.
It hadn’t worked. The pain in her hand had receded but her thoughts still hurt. She pulled her jeans on over her wet legs, intending to return to her room but then, overwhelmed with sadness, she sat on the bank, brought her knees up to her chest, and wept.
“Tonks,” said Remus from behind her. “What’s wrong?”
She tried to smother her sobs but it was too late. He sat down next to her and put one arm around her shoulders.
“Tell me what the matter is,” he said softly.
“I have these nightmares about Sirius,” she mumbled. “I see him murdering those Muggles, I see him being dragged away by Mad-Eye, and I can’t do a damn thing to help.” She paused. Remus stroked her wet hair but said nothing. “I still think he’s innocent,” she continued vehemently, “but I still can’t do a blind thing to prove it.”
“You’ve always known it would be difficult, Tonks,” Remus whispered. “Why are you so upset now?”
“Because something happened just before I left for Romania,” she said. She lifted up her face and was touched at the tenderness in his eyes. They were so close now; she was a hair’s breadth away from being able to kiss him, but the horror of the nightmare weighed on her shoulders and she turned back to look at the lake. “As part of my end of year assessment, I had to face a Dementor,” she said bleakly, “and I failed.”
End Notes:
See, I told you Remus would be back soon. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please leave a review.
Chapter 8 "Expecto Patronum!" by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Remus Lupin knows he should stay away from Nymphadora Tonks. She's thirteen years younger, with a bright future stretching out before her; whereas he is a werewolf, living hand to mouth.
But Tonks has other ideas; she needs his help and for some reason, he finds it hard to say no.
Thank you to Cassie(ms leading) for beta'ing this chapter and Terri (mudbloodproud) for being generally wonderful.
Special thanks again for the music of Amy Winehouse which is keeping me going.
I'm not JK Rowling.
Remus heard the despair in her voice as she recounted her moment with the Dementor.
“It was a test, obviously, to see how we’d cope under pressure. And, you know what, Remus? I cracked. I’ve been trying so bloody, bloody hard with everything. I’d even improved on sodding Stealth and Tracking, which I’m crap at. Moody was watching as I came out of that test and almost smiled, so I knew I’d be okay. Then I’m told to wait in this side room. I wasn’t quite naive enough to think the tests were over, but I was expecting a Boggart or something.”
“What happened?” he said gently.
“There was a Dementor in the corner. I saw it glide towards me and I knew what I had to do, I knew I had to produce a Patronus, or else get out the room. I decided to stay and fight.” She stopped.
“Go on,” Remus whispered in her ear.
“Well, that was my first mistake. I’ve never been that good at producing a Patronus. I’ve been able to produce silvery mist and an indistinct form of something, but never a Patronus with a corporeal form. And that mist was produced in a brightly lit classroom on a summer’s day, not in a darkened room in the Ministry with a real life Dementor bearing down on me.”
“It was your first time facing one, Tonks,” replied Remus soothingly. “Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
But he doubted she’d heard his words as shuddered again. “And then the thing was moving closer and I could feel the air get colder. I wracked my brain for a happy memory, but all I could think of was my ninth birthday and my parents taking me to Diagon Alley for an ice-cream.” She laughed bitterly. “Another mistake, as that particular birthday treat ended abruptly with my mum getting spat at for being a Black.” She stopped and gulped down the fresh air.
“But I still stood there, not willing to give in, and tried another memory. All the while, I could hear this laughter, this manic laughter, in my ears and I couldn’t pinpoint where I’d heard it before. The Dementor got closer, and I remembered it was Sirius laughing as he was dragged away to Azkaban. I started crying then.” Tonks’ voice had faded to a whisper. “I tried - oh, Merlin, I tried - to summon another happy memory, but everything seemed to have gone. Finally, Quidditch floated into my head, so I stood up and remembered the last goal I scored to get the record, and, at last, something emerged from the wand. It was just mist, and not enough to repel the Dementor for long, but it gave me time and I fled the room.”
Tonks clutched her knees to her chest even tighter and began to shiver. Remus put his other arm around her and tried to warm her.
“What did Moody say?” Remus said after a while.
“Not much,” admitted Tonks. “In fact, he barely spoke to me, and I left for Romania the next day.”
“Well,” said Remus, a slight smile on his face, “if Mad-Eye didn’t shout at you for being foolhardy or careless, then you can bet he’s impressed.”
“Impressed?” she said, sniffing. “With my failure?”
“You didn’t fail, Tonks. You stood there and attempted to fight. I think that was the test,” Remus replied. He placed one of his hands under her chin and lifted her face up. With the other hand he gently wiped her tears away. Then something flickered in his consciousness. Instead of the kiss he wanted to bestow on her mouth, he gave her a peck on her forehead and moved away slightly. “Come on,” he said. “I want to dress that dragon bite before I go to work.”
“Oh, sure,” Tonks replied, accepting his hand. He led her up the steps and they Apparated back to the pub in silence.
“I must change out of these things,” said Tonks when she got to her room. “I’m squelching!”
“Okay,” replied Remus, grateful for some breathing space between them. “I’ll be back in five minutes.”
He walked away and shut himself in his bedroom. Horribly aware that his heart was beating fast, he tried to make sense of what had so nearly happened with Tonks. She was pretty, true enough, but he’d met prettier. She was smart, but he’d met smarter. There was just something about her that seemed to burrow under all his highly attuned defences. He walked over to the basin in his room and splashed some cold water on his face, all the while thinking that a cold shower would be more effective.
Ten minutes later, having assumed his normal facade, Remus knocked on Tonks’ door. She’d changed into a dry T-shirt and a pair of faded denim shorts. She held a towel in her hand and was drying her hair with it. She let him in and sat on the edge of her bed whilst he sat beside her and removed the dressing.
“You shouldn’t swim, really,” he said, pleased his voice was sounding steady. “Not until this has had a chance to heal.”
“The dragon handlers are down there all the time. You’re not telling me they never get bitten, are you, Remus?”
“They always wear gloves, Tonks. Something you forgot about last night,” he reproved.
“Hold on,” she retorted indignantly. “You weren’t wearing gloves, either.”
“You are infuriating!” he said through gritted teeth.
She grinned at him and he found himself grinning back. Carefully, he applied the new dressing and then bandaged it further. As he turned her hand over, he noticed a small scar on her finger.
“Another dragon bite?” he asked, frowning slightly.
Tonks looked at the scar. “Oh, that. No, it’s an animal bite. For some reason, I can’t hide it with my Metamorphic skills, but it’s very small so I’m not that bothered.”
“What sort of animal?” asked Remus.
“A rat,” she replied.
Remus stared at the bite for a few more seconds, and then shook his head. That, Remus, is the most stupid, grasping-at-straws idea you’ve had in years, he thought.
“What are you thinking about?” Tonks asked curiously.
“Nothing,” he said dismissively. “You should be fine now, but I’ll look at it tomorrow “ just in case. Right, I really have to go. I don’t want to be late on my first day.” He looked up, hearing a shout from outside and the sound of footsteps on the stairs.
“Tonks,” shouted the voice “What have you done to upset Catalina, now? She’s downstairs ranting about ‘immoral English witches’, so I assume...,” Charlie appeared in the doorway, “she means you.” Charlie’s eyes found Remus. ”Lupin. What a surprise.”
Remus could see Charlie’s eyes taking in the scene in Tonk’s room. Her clothes, wet from the lake, were discarded in a heap on the floor; they were both sitting on the bed and he was still holding her hand. Hastily, he dropped Tonks’ hand and began to shut his case. “It’s not what you think, Charlie,” he said in what he hoped was an unperturbed manner.
“How do you know what I’m thinking?” Charlie replied quietly. “Catalina is downstairs crashing pots around the place, threatening to send Tonks packing because she spent the night with a gentleman, and now I find you here, in her bedroom.”
“Charlie, for Merlin’s sake, you sound like Professor McGonagall’s maiden aunt,” said Tonks, laughing. She got up and pulled him from the doorway and into the room. “I bumped into Remus last night; he’s just started work at the reserve, and we had supper together in his room. Unfortunately, the lovely Catalina has taken a shine to him and didn’t particularly like it when I turned up to ruin her plans for a shared bottle of wine.”
“So why is he here now, in your room, Tonks?” Charlie retorted. “Or is this breakfast?” There was no missing the insinuation in his voice.
“Hey, hey,” Remus said. He could feel himself getting angry but when he looked at Charlie’s furious face, the anger drained away. He continued calmly, “Tonks got injured last night and I helped her out.”
“What do you mean injured?” Charlie asked in alarm. He looked down, and for the first time he noticed her bandaged thumb. The fight left him.“What in Merlin’s name have you done now?”
Tonks reddened and mumbled that it was nothing. Remus looked at the floor. He wasn’t entirely sure how much trouble she’d be in if Charlie knew she’d been at the reserve last night.
“A bat,” he said suddenly. “It bit her and I know quite a lot about bat bites so I took care of it,” he finished rather hurriedly and then stood up.
“You know a lot about bat bites, Lupin?” Charlie asked. “Are you a Vampire, or something?”
“He’s not pale enough to be a Vampire, Weasley,” Tonks said. She stood up and ushered both men out of her room. “Look, if you don’t mind, I had a really bad night’s sleep “ and before you raise your eyebrows, Weasley, I was alone last night “ so I would quite like to grab another hour or two before Catalina chucks me out. I’ll see you later, okay?” she said, looking at Charlie.
“Uh, that’s what I came to tell you, Tonks,” Charlie said sheepishly. “I’ve got to work tonight as well as today. I doubt I’ll be able to get off much later than midnight.”
“It’s a good job I have my book then, isn’t it?” she said dryly as she closed her bedroom door.
Remus faced Charlie at the top of the stairs. “We honestly didn’t spend the night together, Charlie,” he said gently. “She was in my room when Catalina came in and ... well ... you know what Tonks is like. She rather gave the impression that we were a couple and Catalina took it badly.”
Charlie snorted. “Yes, I know exactly what Tonks is like. She couldn’t keep out of trouble at school, either.” He paused and started to walk down the stairs. “She likes you, Lupin. You do know that, don’t you?”
Remus slowed his pace and looked at the floor. This wasn’t the conversation he wanted to hear at this time, not when he’d almost weakened by the lake. “Nonsense,” he said. “She sees me as a substitute for Sirius, that’s all.” He sighed. “I guess I should go and speak to Catalina or she really will throw her out, won’t she?”
“Nah, don’t worry. Catalina may not like Tonks much but she does like her money. She won’t chuck her out. And I guess if she thinks you two are a couple, she’ll leave you alone, too.” He laughed, slightly bitterly, at the obvious relief on Remus’ face. Then he sighed and gave a wry smile. “Come on, we both need to get to work.”
***
Work at the reserve was hard, Remus discovered, but very satisfying. The camaraderie between the permanent dragon handlers was strong and although they viewed the new intake with suspicion, perhaps knowing that most of them would leave very soon, they were welcoming enough. At lunchtime, Charlie pulled him to one side and they sat down together, breaking off great hunks of bread and topping them with wedges of cheese.
“Why are you here?” Charlie asked.
“I need the work,” Remus replied bluntly.
“No, you misunderstand me,” said Charlie. “I mean, why Romania? Why aren’t you settled with a wife and kids, and a job at the Ministry or something?”
Remus paused and helped himself to a bottle of the local Butterbeer. After taking a swig he looked at Charlie who hadn’t taken his eyes off him. “Itchy feet, Charlie,” he replied lightly. “I don’t like being in one place for too long.”
“And the lack of a wife?” asked Charlie.
“Never met the right one. How about you?” asked Remus, glancing across to Alexa who was sitting with another woman and kept glancing across at Charlie. “Is she your Miss Right?”
“Who, Alexa?” Charlie asked, smiling. “Very early days, but...,” he stopped and smiled, “you never know. I could do worse.”
“She’s not Tonks though, is she?” said Remus sagely. He looked across and saw the younger man flush. “Sorry, it’s none of my business.”
Charlie stared at Remus for a moment and then spoke. “No, she’s not Tonks, but I gave up on that idea a long time ago.”
After a while, when Charlie had finished his food and was opening a bottle of Butterbeer, he began to talk again.
“Will you tell me why you turned up at Hogwarts during that Quidditch match, Remus?”
Remus swallowed his beer and replied, “You know, don’t you, about the Veritaserum Tonks fed me?” Charlie nodded. “Mmm, you helped her steal the ingredients, I believe.” There was a pause as Charlie grinned sheepishly. “Well, she turned up on my doorstep desperate to hear me confess to betrayal and murder “ which of course didn’t happen. To tell you the truth, Charlie, I was worried for her, so I came to see Dumbledore. She’s so blindly loyal to Sirius. She has this image in her head of the handsome cousin she met when she was six and it doesn’t tally with the reality. Even if she’s right and he’s innocent, Sirius wasn’t this demigod that she reveres. “
“What was he like then?” asked Charlie.
“Now you’re asking,” said Remus and he laughed. “Sirius Black was brave, handsome, reckless, and enduringly loyal.”
“You sound as if you’ve given him demigod status yourself,” said Charlie half mockingly.
“Let me finish,” said Remus. “He could also be irredeemably arrogant, sharp-tongued, and bloody-minded. He and James were like twins torn apart at birth. They were possibly the two most troublesome, yet also the two most highly talented students at Hogwarts. Peter and I were grateful, I think, to be towed along in their wake.”
“So what happened, Remus?” Charlie asked in a low voice. “Why did Black turn bad?”
Remus stood up abruptly and made to walk away. Charlie caught his sleeve and tugged him back. “Why do you think he betrayed them? Or do you think he’s innocent, too?”
Remus gazed into distance. From here, he could just about see the pub; he wondered if Tonks was awake yet. “I don’t know why he betrayed them, Charlie, but we all have secrets in our lives. Sirius came from a long established dark family. Perhaps he cracked? Or maybe he was always dark, but we couldn’t see it?” He sighed and began to walk away. “As for your second question: no, I don’t think he’s innocent, but, by Godric, I wish he was!”
They went back to work in silence. Charlie had explained to Remus that his duties mainly consisted of dragon dung clearing. It was dirty, hard and back-breaking work, even with the aid of magic, but Remus was just glad to be occupied with something that approached honest labour. Unfortunately, it could not distract him from his thoughts which seemed to be drifting more and more often to Tonks.
When he was halfway through clearing one of the enclosures, Charlie jumped down and started to help him. “You were in the Order of the Phoenix, right?” he asked Remus suddenly.
Remus stopped and wiped his brow. “Yes, I was in the Order,” he replied.
Charlie handed him a cup filled with cold water. He gulped half of it down, and then tipped the rest over his head.
“Did you know the Prewetts?” asked Charlie. He refilled the cup, and offered it again to Remus.
“Gideon and Fabian?” replied Remus, accepting the cup. “Yes, I knew them well. Oh,” he said, pausing, “your mother’s Molly Prewett, or rather Weasley, I should say, their younger sister.”
“Yes, they were my uncles. I don’t remember them that clearly. I was probably seven when they died, but I remember Christmases when Gideon would turn up with pockets full of Chocolate Frogs. And Fabian would turn candy canes into miniature wands for us to play with.” He smiled at the memory.
“I never noticed before, but you look a lot like Gideon,” replied Remus. “They were both very brave, you know. True Gryffindors. I’m not sure if that’s of any comfort to your mother, but...” He left the rest unsaid. Charlie nodded acknowledgement of the tribute to his dead uncles and then returned to work.
At seven that evening, Remus finished work. Reeking of dragon dung and sweat, he limped out of the enclosure towards the water butts set up on the edge of the compound. There he filled a large bucket with ice cold water and emptied it over himself.
“You look as if you needed that,” said a voice behind him. He turned to see the young Dragon Handler, Alexa, who’d shown him around yesterday. She was carrying the parchment of duty rosters in her hand. “Not used to the hard work, I think?”
“It’s been a while,” Remus admitted, “but I’ve worked in places like this before.”
Alexa sat on the edge of the water butt. “Yes,” she agreed. “I can see you’ve worked hard before. You don’t complain like most of the new people. It makes a change.”
He smiled at her but didn’t say anything.
“I think you would rather be doing other things though, yes?” she asked him.
Remus shrugged. “Perhaps.”
“Charlie tells me you are friendly with his friend Tonks. Is she your girl?” she enquired.
Remembering that this was Catalina’s daughter, Remus bit back the automatic denial. “Not exactly. It’s ... complicated,” he said, conscious that she was watching him very closely.
“You should join us at the lake one evening, and then she will not need to leave so early,” said Alexa. She jumped off the water butt and began to walk back to work. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yes?”
“Err, yes,” replied Remus faintly. He walked across to a large hut where he could get an evening meal. He helped himself to a large bowl of meatballs and potatoes and sat down to eat, savouring the taste even more than usual because he was so hungry.
Deciding to walk back to the pub rather than Apparating, Remus took delight in the meandering stream that showed him the way. He entered the pub through the side door and hastily ran up the stairs to avoid Catalina’s interrogation. He paused outside Tonks’ room, wondering if he should knock on her door to see if she was all right, but thought better of it and moved on.
“Not coming to see me, then?” said Tonks, appearing suddenly from a door opposite her room and wearing only a purple towel and a striped bathrobe.
He jumped back and laughed nervously. “Oh, hello. I thought you might still be sleeping,” he said feebly.
“At this hour?” she said, laughing. “I didn’t have that bad a night’s sleep. How was work?”
“Fine,” he said, “but exhausting and...”
Tonks leant forward and sniffed. “And quite dirty, by the smell of you.” She grinned at him and pointed to the room she’d just left. “Bathroom’s that way, Remus.” She began to let herself into her room then stopped and turned back to look at him. “Um,” she began, and Remus noticed she was fiddling with a strand of her wet, and now long, blonde hair. Then she looked him straight in the eye. “Would you help me with something later?”
“What do you need help with?” he asked suspiciously.
She smiled faintly at the expression on his face. “Nothing illegal, I promise. I’d just like some help with...,” she dropped her voice and suddenly sounded ashamed, “my Patronus.”
A voice inside his head screamed at him to say no, to turn away and refuse to help, but before he could act on that voice he found that he’d taken her hand and squeezed it tenderly. “Of course I’ll help, if I can,” he replied softly. “Give me a chance to get clean and I’ll be right along, okay?”
She nodded, looking grateful, and walked into her room. Remus sighed. He’d been looking forward to a long hot soak in the bath tub and an early night, but he remembered her utter desolation last night and didn’t feel he could let her down.
Half an hour later he knocked on her door. She answered the door and ushered him in. He looked round the room. Clothes littered the floor and she had several books spread out on the table. A bottle of pumpkin juice and a half eaten sandwich had been placed on the floor. She looked at him perusing her room.
“Yeah, I’m a slob. I know that,” she said. “It drives my mum mad. Sorry, I’m looking for the pair to this.” She held up a black sandal. “Ah,” she said as she lifted up a pillow from the floor, “here it is.” She sat on the edge of her bed and began to put the sandals on.
Remus walked over to the desk and picked up one of the books. “Advanced Dark Arts?” he said in surprise. “This looks like NEWT level. Aren’t you beyond that at Auror training?”
“Mmm, I should be, and for most things I am. It’s just the Patronus really. Our last Defence teacher ran out on us early on in the summer term when we’d only just started learning about them?”
“Ran out?” asked Remus. “What did you do to the poor man?”
“It was a witch actually, Professor Goldsworthy. And we’re not sure, but we think she eloped with Madame Pince’s nephew,” Tonks answered. Remus noticed she was still lacing up her sandals in a rather elaborate way. “She was a fairly rubbish teacher actually, but very good at getting books out of the library.” Tonks snorted. “Madame Pince’s nephew was working as her assistant and ... well, let’s just say he disappeared at the same time.” She stood up. “Okay, Professor Lupin, I’m ready. Lead on.”
Remus smiled ruefully. They walked down the stairs together and out of the pub under the eagle eyes of Catalina.
“Where are you taking me, Professor?” Tonks said, joking.
“Well, Miss Tonks,” he said, responding to her jokey tone. “I think it’s best if we go somewhere secluded and fairly dark. Obviously there are no Dementors here, but once you’ve mastered the spell, you’ll get more confident.”
Tonks swallowed hard. “Okay,” she said, suddenly sounding a lot less secure.
They carried on walking. Remus thought about Apparating but decided Tonks needed time to collect her thoughts. Finally, at the edge of the wood, he stopped her. “We’re nearly there. Do you see that small hillock over there?” She looked at the direction he was pointing and nodded. “Underneath is a small underground room. I discovered it last week when I first arrived. I think Muggles built them during one of their wars as shelters. It’s deserted now, obviously, but still useful.”
“Useful?” she inquired.
He smiled slightly at her. “Useful for someone who wants to lock themselves away for a night,” he replied. He saw her redden as she realised what he was talking about. “For tonight, though,” he continued, “I thought it would be the ideal place to practise. It’s dark, damp, dingy, and downright depressing. Perfect!” He laughed, but noticed she didn’t join in. In spite of himself he leant forward and ruffled her hair. “I’m sure you can do this, Tonks. All you have to do is focus on a really happy memory.”
Remus entered the shelter first and held out his hand to help her down. He’d never known her this silent. “Are you sure you want to do this, Tonks?” he asked. “We can leave now, if you wish.”
“No,” she exclaimed fiercely. “I need to do this.” She followed him determinedly into the centre of the room. It was, as he’d said, dark and depressing. She could smell the damp pervading the air. “Merlin. You’re planning on transforming here?” she muttered.
“Yes,” Remus replied. “It’s the ideal place. Secure and sound proofed.”
“But it looks so ... so...” She stopped while she searched for the right word. “Grim! Can’t you make yourself comfortable, with cushions or something?”
He grimaced. “You sound like my mother. The first time I transformed, she locked me up with pillows and blankets. She even gave me a teddy bear. After the first hour its head was ripped to shreds. There’s no point in attempting comfort, Tonks.”
“Sorry,” she said and her voice wobbled. “You must think me incredibly naive.”
“Come on,” he said, unwilling to dwell on the subject any longer. “Let’s get started. Show me what you can do.”
“Oh,” she said in surprise. “Okay.”
She took out her wand and focused on a spot in the distance. As she closed her eyes, Remus could see her summoning a memory. “Expecto Patronum!” she cried. A silvery wisp, barely more than a feather, appeared from the end of her wand. She smiled apologetically and tried again. This time the mist appeared slightly denser. Remus nodded encouragingly and she tried for the third time. But still only mist appeared. Remus could see her frustration mounting and stopped her fourth attempt.
“Come here,” he said. “I think you need to adjust your wand grip.” He stood behind her and manoeuvred her hand around her wand. She winced. “Is that bite still hurting?” he asked in alarm.
She turned her head around to face him. “No, it doesn’t really hurt. You just touched it, that’s all,” she said, smiling up at him. She was so close now; if he’d dropped his mouth an inch he could have kissed her.
Remus moved to one side. “Watch me,” he instructed and pulled out his wand. “Expecto Patronum!” he uttered. At once, a huge silver form escaped from his wand and charged around the small room. Its size took her breath away.
“It’s a lion,” she cried in delight. “Your Patronus is a lion. Oh, Remus, he’s amazing.”
Remus laughed. “It’s the Gryffindor lion, I think. I told you, I was never happier than when I was at Hogwarts, with my friends. We were all Gryffindor Lions and my Patronus reflects that. Also...” He paused as he watched his lion disappear. “I like to think a lion could take on a werewolf ... and win.”
“Right, let me have another go,” urged Tonks with fresh enthusiasm.
“Go ahead, just remember a really happy memory,” he replied as he walked back to the wall to watch her.
“You really are adorable,” Remus heard her whispering over and over again. She brandished her wand and shouted “Expecto Patronum!” This time something that approached a form whooshed out of her wand. She shrieked encouragement but it soon faded. Tonks turned around to Remus. “Could you see what it was?”
“No,” he replied. “Tell me, though, what was your memory?”
Tonks giggled. “I was thinking about motorbikes, and helmets, and Sirius twirling me round until I was giddy with happiness.” She sighed as she remembered that afternoon.
“You may need a different memory,” instructed Remus softly. “I think that one also makes you slightly sad.”
She blinked, shook herself, and thought carefully. “Show me again, Remus,” she demanded.
Remus pulled out his wand and thought of a girl, her eyes shining with excitement, just before she’d jumped into the tunnel in Honeydukes cellar. He thought of the kiss they’d shared. “Expecto Patronum!” He watched as his lion roared into life.
Tonks squared her shoulders.
“Have you got your thought?” asked Remus.
“Yes,” she replied, glancing across at him. Remus could see her eyes dilate and a smile play across her face as she touched her lips with her hand. “Expecto Patronum!” she cried for the fifth time.
This time what escaped from her was not just mist. This time a form rampaged through the room. Tonks and Remus gasped as the creature turned around and they saw its image. As it pounced across the floor, Remus recognised it as feline. Merlin, he thought in horror. Don’t tell me she’s conjured a lioness!
“It’s a panther!” Tonks screamed ecstatically. “It’s a black panther. Isn’t he beautiful?” She watched in awe as the creature faded away and then flung her arms around Remus. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” she repeated. “I never dreamt something so agile would be my Patronus.”
Feeling thoroughly uncomfortable at this turn of events, Remus disentangled himself from her embrace. “Well,” he began nervously, “what did you think you’d conjure?”
Tonks dropped her hands to her sides, seemingly aware he’d rebuffed her. “The joke at Hogwarts was that I’d have a chameleon “ for obvious reasons “ or a bull, because I’m so clumsy,” she explained, and then frowned. “People tend to see only those two things about me, you see.”
“Well,” he replied in a hearty tone, “you, Miss Tonks, have just proved them all wrong. You are my top student of the day and I award Hufflepuff twenty house points.”
“If I do it again, can we win the House Cup?” she asked cheekily.
***
Finally, Remus managed to drag Tonks out of the shelter. He sealed it magically and they walked back to the pub together. He watched her now, talking excitedly. Her head was so high in the clouds that he wondered if her feet were touching the ground.
A black panther, he thought. It had shocked him to see something feline emerging from her wand. To be honest, he’d expected her Patronus to be a large dog due to his sureness that her emotional side was taken up with thoughts of Sirius. He’d been comfortable with that. Her need to talk about Sirius, on the occasions they’d met, had helped him too as he’d begun to remember the good times before Sirius had become a traitor. But her panther changed things. She’d seen his lion and changed her memory. He remembered her glancing across at him and touching her lips before casting her spell. She had thought of their kiss and that terrified him. He could not, would not be responsible for someone else’s happiness.
“Are you coming to the lake on Friday?” she asked, her excited voice interrupting his thoughts.
“I don’t know. I probably have to work,” he replied shortly.
“Oh,” she said and sighed. “It’s my last night, that’s all, and Charlie said a few people would be going. Please try, Remus. You know how bad my Romanian is.” She peeped at him from beneath a now pink spiky fringe and a smile tugged at her lips.
Say no, he thought. Tell her you’re busy.
“I’ll see,” he muttered.
Despite his best intentions, Remus was unable to persuade Alexa to roster him on for work on Friday night. Having fixed her attentions firmly on Charlie, Remus could see she wasn’t about to let him get distracted by Tonks. “You come with us to the lake on Friday, yes?” she told him. Then she leant forwards. “And in return, I will make sure you get whatever day off you want, Remus Lupin.”
And so, because he desperately needed the day after his transformation off work, he felt he had no other option but to agree. Meanwhile, by volunteering for nightshifts and sleeping during the day, he successfully avoided all but the merest contact. He’d say hello when they met, and she’d smile happily, although she too seemed busy and content not to spend all her time with him.
By Friday, Remus had relaxed. The Patronus form meant nothing; he’d been stupid to react in that way. There were hundreds of cats, and her black panther was probably more of a representation of her Black family roots than anything else.
“You are coming, aren’t you?” said Tonks, as he returned to the pub at seven that evening. She was sitting outside, enjoying the last glimmers of sun. Her normally pale face was looking tanned, and she’d changed her hair to a honey blonde. “To the lake, I mean. Alexa said you weren’t working, and I’ve been preparing enough food to feed an army of Weasleys.” She lifted the top off a basket by her feet and Remus could see sandwiches, fruit and local cakes squashed alongside drinks and a rug.
“Yes,” he replied. “Give me some time to wash and change. I’ll meet you there.”
“No, that’s okay,” she said. “Charlie and Alexa aren’t ready yet, so I’ll wait out here for you.”
Twenty minutes later, he joined the three of them outside. Lifting Tonks’ basket, Remus followed Charlie’s Apparating instructions and landed at the side of the lake. Tonks arrived just after him, laughing at something, whilst Charlie was scowling.
“It wasn’t funny, Tonks,” he was saying.
“It was bloody funny, Weasley, and you know it. You just couldn’t bear the fact that I got my licence first.” Tonks began to explain to Remus and Alexa, “When Charlie first took the Apparition test, he ended up five miles south of where he was supposed to and on top of some poor Muggle outside a supermarket.”
She laughed and turned her face directly towards Remus and, suddenly, there it was: that wide smile that could light up a room, or a grown man’s heart. Remus felt his stomach flip over. Merlin! he thought. It would be so easy to fall in love with her.
He didn’t know how he got through the evening. At first, he said little and kept himself just slightly apart from the group who joined them. Tonks herself seemed more silent than usual. She kept casting him curious glances and tried to draw him in to the conversation, but eventually, after he pleaded tiredness, she let him be. He sat back on the rug, watching as she joined the others to swim, but declined her invitation to take part himself. As he watched her standing in the water, the moonlight casting mysterious shadows on her face and emphasizing the slenderness of her body, he was overwhelmed by longing. A longing not just for her, but for his lost youth, for evenings spent splashing in The Black Lake with the Marauders, and Lily ducking James under water.
“What are you thinking about?” asked Tonks as she walked back over to him, her body dripping from her swim. He’d been so caught up with reminiscences that he hadn’t noticed her emerging from the water.
“James and Lily,” he muttered. “I was remembering them. Look, Tonks, I’m sorry, but I really am tired and need to call it a night.” He stood up abruptly, not wishing to look at her longer than was necessary. He held his hand out to her. “I don’t think I’ll see you before you leave so ... good luck with training and everything.”
He saw her looking at his outstretched hand with a look of confusion on her face. “Um, yeah, right. Thanks, Remus, for everything. And...” She paused. “Sorry, I was such a nuisance.”
“You weren’t a nuisance,” he mumbled, and then he Apparated away.
***
Six days later, Remus entered the Muggle shelter to transform. Using his wand to cast some light, he looked around and did a double take. Someone had been here and that someone had been determined to change this cell into something more inviting. She hadn’t bothered with cushions and blankets, but she had transformed the walls. She had been here, while he worked, and painted the Gryffindor Lion as it emerged from a wand. It was not a magical painting for she did not have that skill, but his lion seemed to roar down from the walls. On another wall, she’d painted herself, alongside a large black cat, and above them, like a banner, she’d simply painted the words ‘Thank you!’
There was a small package in the centre of the room accompanied by a note.
Remus, she had written.
I made you some of that salve you use. I noticed you were running low and I doubt you’ve had time to make some more. This is my own variation. Professor Snape thought it acceptable “ so it should be fantastic!
Thank you for all your help this holiday, St George.
Love Tonks, a damsel no longer in distress.
Xxx
End Notes:
Oh, Remus...you fool! He makes me so mad at times. Just get on and kiss the girl, will you? I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a review. Concrit or gushing praise - I love it all.
Chapter 9 - The Raid by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Although busy with Auror Training, Tonks still finds herself brooding over her encounter with Remus in Romania.Perhaps what she needs is a distraction. Could Daily Prophet journalist, Rob Avery, be that distraction?
Thank you so much to Cassie (ms leading) for beta'ing this chapter and giving me a swift kick when I needed it. Thanks also to Terri for giving me some advice.
Special mention to Lexxyy and Livi for coming up with names for the pub and the drink.
Tonks sat at her desk in the Auror office, listening idly to the conversations going on around her. Back from Romania nearly three months now, she found her thoughts drifting less and less to moonlit encounters with dragons and conversations by the lakeside. There had been an indefinable moment, after she’d wept over the Dementor, when she’d thought there was something between her and Remus. She closed her eyes, remembering. It had been like the time in the Infirmary when his fingertips had traced her cheekbone, and when he’d kissed her in Honeydukes cellar. However, when Remus had left so suddenly, she’d realised how irritating it must have been for him to have her tagging along all the time.
It does, she thought, feel good to be back. With the knowledge that she could now produce a proper Patronus, she felt that she was at last starting to make her mark. Just as Remus had predicted, Moody had been impressed with her decision to tackle the Dementor and had voiced this to Scrimgeour several times. The Head Auror must have agreed because he cleared her to continue into the second year of training.
“So this Avery character,” she heard Moody snarl to Scrimgeour, “he’s going to be based in this department?”
“Yes, Alastor,” replied Scrimgeour, in exasperation. “Look, I’m not happy about it either, especially given his family, but Fudge thinks it’s a good idea. Good publicity for the Auror department, especially as we now have “” he stopped and inclined his head towards Tonks ““a witch in the department.”
Tonks looked up at Scrimgeour’s words. The name Avery struck a chord with her. Frowning, she tried to remember where she’d heard it before.
“Rob!” she heard Proudfoot yell across the office. “Rob Avery, what on earth are you doing here?”
Tonks looked up to see Proudfoot walking across the office to greet a figure lounging in the doorway.
Avery, she thought, and stared at the newcomer. Aware of her scrutiny, Rob Avery turned his head and smiled directly at her.
Wow! she thought as she took in his slim figure and blond curly hair. He’s gorgeous.
Scrimgeour and Moody stopped their conversation; Scrimgeour beckoned to the young man, and he entered the office and stood by his side.
“Listen up, everyone,” ordered the Head Auror. “This is Robert Avery, from the Daily Prophet. He’s writing a series of articles about the Auror department, so I expect you to make him welcome.”
As Tonks saw Moody’s magical eye swivel in disapproval, she snorted. Scrimgeour glared at her, so she smothered her grin but not before she’d caught Rob Avery grinning back. He winked at her.
“Sir,” Proudfoot said from his desk, “Rob’s welcome to shadow me on assignment. We’re old friends.”
“Excellent idea,” Scrimgeour replied. “Any objections, Avery?”
“Err, well,” Rob said diffidently, “I think our readers might like a more unique viewpoint than a working Aurors’. Do you have any ... uh ... trainees I could follow?”
“Yes, I think I could arrange that. Edwin Savage is currently in his third year, and Nymphadora Tonks is in her second. Take your pick.”
“Oh, I think Nymphadora will do fine,” said Rob, smiling. “The readers will love a witch’s perspective.”
“Fine,” said Scrimgeour dismissively. “Alastor Moody will run through their schedule.”
“Their?” queried Rob.
“Alastor Moody is Miss Tonks’ current partner. None of the trainees work alone.”
Rob nodded and then looked at Tonks. ‘Shame,’ he mouthed, smiling. She smiled back. The next few weeks will be fun, Tonks thought.
***
Fun, Tonks decided two weeks later, was definitely not the word. Rob Avery, she decided, was the most big-headed, sexist prat she’d ever come across. When he wasn’t hanging onto Mad-Eye’s words like some fawning Pygmy Puff, he was sitting in the office drinking coffee with Proudfoot and laughing at disparaging jokes about witches. The worst of it was that everyone thought he was bloody wonderful. Even Moody wasn’t quite as dismissive once he’d discovered that Rob had an impressive list of contacts.
Grudgingly, Tonks had to admit that he was professional. His initial flirtatious attitude had changed to one of politeness when she’d refused his offer of a drink after work.
Perhaps I should have gone for that drink? she thought. It’s not as though I’m having any fun sitting in my flat by myself night after night.
She’d been leaving the office one evening when he’d asked. Tonks remembered it clearly, because she’d been gazing at the full moon that hung in the sky. She’d barely heard his invitation, and had perhaps been a touch brusque when she turned him down, so she wasn’t surprised that he hadn’t repeated the invitation.
Not that I’d want to go anywhere with him, she thought moodily.
Tonks was sitting at her desk, trying to decide which pile of paperwork to attack first when she heard a familiar voice from behind her. “Hello, Nymphadora.” Tonks turned round to see Arthur Weasley had entered the office. “I’m looking for Alastor.”
“He’s out at the moment, Mr Weasley,” she replied. Although he’d asked her to call him Arthur, she couldn’t quite bring herself to do that. This was Charlie’s father, after all.
“Arthur,” he said warmly. “Call me Arthur, Nymphadora.” He smiled gently at her.
“I will if you call me Tonks, Arthur,” she replied impulsively. “Charlie must have told you what I do to people who use my first name.”
Arthur chuckled. “Yes, he has told us about your temper, but, my dear, I’m married to a red-haired witch with a fierce tongue, so you won’t terrify me.” He paused. “Have you heard from Charlie recently?”
Tonks nodded. “Uh huh - I got an owl last week. He seems very busy. Although whether that’s work or play, I don’t know. Alexa is keeping him occupied.” She chuckled.
“Oh, you know about his girlfriend, then?” said Arthur, going slightly pink.
“Mmm, I met her when I was there in the summer. She’s nice, Arthur. I don’t think Mrs Weasley needs to worry about her little boy.” Tonks snorted.
Arthur smiled. “I’m glad. Molly worries about him being so far away. I know she wants him back here, and the thought of a Romanian girlfriend makes her realise that he’s not coming back in the near future.”
“Well, not until they re-introduce dragons to Britain,” replied Tonks.
“I think Molly rather hoped you’d... um... tempt him back,” he said, going pink again.
Tonks laughed. “I’m sorry. We were only ever friends, Arthur,” she said, ignoring the month she and Charlie had dated. “Now, what did you want to see Mad-Eye about?”
“Ah,” he said, remembering the reason he’d come here. “It’s about the raid.”
“What raid?” asked Tonks. She hadn’t heard anything about a raid.
“Malfoy Manor,” replied Arthur. He rubbed his hands together gleefully. “This could be our chance to finally get something on Lucius Malfoy. Mad-Eye and I have been after him for years!”
Tonks was very still. She’d heard nothing about this. About to ask Arthur more, she was interrupted by the sound of Moody’s leg clunking along the wooden floor and the irritating voice of Rob Avery as he asked even more questions. She gritted her teeth.
“Mad-Eye,” she said coldly, “Arthur’s been waiting for you. He wants to know what’s happening about the raid.”
Moody looked at her calmly. “Wait out here, please, Nymphadora. I’ll speak to you when I’ve finished talking to Arthur.” He ushered Arthur into his office and closed the door very firmly behind them. Tonks felt a flicker of satisfaction that Rob-bloody-Avery hadn’t been included in the cosy little meeting either.
“I guess it’s about the raid on Malfoy Manor,” said Rob as he perched himself on her desk. He was quite close to her now and she felt an overwhelming urge to punch him for wearing that self-satisfied smile on his smug face.
“I guess it is,” she mimicked his voice, a mix of the well-to-do accent he’d been brought up with and the rougher intonations he’d added to dampen it down.
“Hey,” he exclaimed, “don’t get mad with me because Moody hasn’t kept you in the picture. I guess he thought you were too close.”
“What do you mean by that?” she spat.
“Lucius Malfoy’s your uncle, isn’t he?” Rob questioned.
“Uncle by marriage,” she replied. “And I’ve never met him “ or my aunt.”
Rob leant in close to her. “I know what it’s like to have family skeletons, Nymphadora.”
She looked at him. His blue eyes that usually mocked suddenly seemed very earnest.
“Your brother,” she said quietly.
“Yep,” he replied. “Angus Avery is my brother and was accused of being a Death Eater.”
Tonks had read the file on Angus Avery as soon as she’d connected him to Rob. There had been patchy, but in her mind compelling, evidence to prove his guilt. Moody had told her that many of the former Death Eaters escaped Azkaban due to family connections and heavy bribes.
“I know what you’re thinking,” he said, suddenly angry. “But Gus was never a Death Eater. He was Imperiused.”
She must have altered her expression in some way because he was becoming very defensive.
“He was never caught doing anything,” he said loudly. “Not like your aunt... and that cousin of yours.”
“Shut up about Sirius,” Tonks retorted fiercely. “You know nothing about him.”
Moody’s office door opened then, interrupting the argument, and Arthur walked out with a smile on his face.
“Nymphadora,” Moody called, “come in here, please.”
Still irate from the brief row with Rob, she walked in and sat down on the hard wooden chair Moody had gestured her towards. He pushed a plate of biscuits towards her, but she shook her head.
“You’re angry with me,” he growled.
“A bit,” she replied. “I didn’t like finding out about a proposed raid from Arthur and Golden Boy out there.”
“Go on,” Moody said, fixing his magical eye on her.
“You’ve always treated me as a partner, Mad-Eye. A junior partner, a very inferior and sometimes inept partner, but a partner all the same. And...” She stopped.
“You think I’ve kept this from you deliberately,” he replied. “Perhaps you thought old Mad-Eye didn’t trust you?”
“It crossed my mind,” she admitted.
“And mine too,” Moody said, and smiled grimly. “But then, as you know, I trust no one.” He paused and then helped himself to a biscuit. “The reason I didn’t tell you about the raid was because I wasn’t sure you could handle it yet.”
“What do you mean?” Tonks said in outrage.
“They are your relatives, Nymphadora.”
“I’ve never met them,” she protested. “My mum was disowned when she eloped with my dad.”
“And maybe you’re itching for a chance for revenge?”
“N-not at all,” she stuttered, although it wasn’t quite true. “Well, I suppose if I’m honest, I would like to be there when the Malfoys are unmasked. My mum, even after all these years, is still hurt by the way her sister treated her. But I can be professional, Mad-Eye, and I want to be there.”
He looked at her, obviously assessing her words. Tonks hoped he realised she was being truthful. Yes, she’d love to see the Malfoys humiliated, but not to the detriment of her career.
“On balance, I think you’ll be an asset to the raid,” Moody said at last. “Now go home and get a good night’s sleep. We meet here tomorrow at five in the morning.”
Tonks face lifted and she smiled at her mentor. “Thank you,” she said as she left his office. “I won’t let you down.”
Rob was still there, perched on her desk. He smiled quizzically at her.
“Raid still on?” he asked. She nodded in reply. “You were very defensive about your cousin earlier on. Why’s that?”
“I don’t like people making connections between me and the Black family, that’s all,” she muttered. Remembering that Rob was a journalist, she cursed her loose-tongued defence of Sirius earlier. “We’re not all dark.”
“I know that better than anyone.” He smiled at her. “I think we’re in the same boat, Nymphadora. Perhaps you’d reconsider my offer of a drink after work? Maybe tonight?”
“Err... I don’t think so,” Tonks replied shortly. She turned back to the pile of paperwork on her desk, hoping he’d leave her alone.
“You don’t like me much, do you?” Rob asked.
“I don’t like wizards who think witches should be tied to a cauldron with five kids running around their ankles. Does that answer your question?”
Rob opened his eyes wide and jerked his head back in surprise. “When have I ever... Oh, you mean the jokes, I suppose,” he said, laughing.
“Uh, yeah,” she replied scathingly. “You and Jacob are like soul mates. Perhaps you should ask him out instead?”
Rob grinned at her. “He’s really not my type.” He paused and when he continued he wasn’t teasing any more. “I’m a journalist, Nymphadora, and I have to be nice to people. It doesn’t do to alienate anyone “ even a prat like Jacob Proudfoot, because I’ll never know if he could be useful. I’m sorry if I caused you offence, but I swear I don’t share his opinions.”
Tonks looked at him. He did seem to be sincere. “I thought you two were friends from school?”
“Not really,” he replied. “We were in the same year and Jacob’s older brother was in Slytherin so we were acquainted.” He smiled ruefully. “Plus we shared a lack of talent on a broomstick “ something I bet you can’t relate too. I hear you’re pretty good.”
Tonks grinned. “I have my moments.”
“So, Nymphadora, will you give me another chance and come out for a drink with me?” He paused and then added, “Purely as colleagues, if that makes you feel better.”
“As colleagues, yeah, okay, and only if you stop using that ridiculous name and call me Tonks,” she replied, smiling back.
***
Rob took her to a pub he knew called The Dragon’s Lair. It was dark and uninviting from the outside, and the small side street where it was situated smelt of uncollected rubbish and stale food. Rob pushed the door and held it open for her, to reveal a small and rather cramped room. It was an old pub and decorated shabbily. The slightly tatty green wallpaper curled at the corners and the dark wooden tables were marked with drink rings. But in spite of this, the pub was cared for and had a friendly atmosphere. Rob found them a table in the corner and raised his hand to the man at the bar.
“What would you like?” Rob asked her politely. “Surprisingly, Sid, the landlord, keeps a very good range of Elfish wine. Would you like me to get a bottle?”
“Um, not really,” replied Tonks apologetically. “I’m not that keen on wine.”
“That’s okay,” he said, smiling at her. “What would you like?”
Tonks paused, wondering if it was really gauche to ask for Butterbeer. She wasn’t much of a drinker. Seeing the drunks in her nan’s pub all those years ago had put her off. She looked at the array of bottles along the shelf. Rob, probably sensing her hesitation, began to speak. “How about I get something for you, like a mead or Firewhisky?”
“Sorry,” she said, “I don’t like Firewhisky either, and mead’s a bit sweet. Do they have any Muggle drinks at all?”
Rob looked at her, frowning slightly. “Muggle drinks? Well, they might. What do you fancy?”
“I quite like cider.” She grinned at him and explained, “My grandma’s a Muggle and she runs a pub in the East end of London. I’ve had cider there.”
“Okay, Tonks, let me see what Sid can do.” Rob weaved his way through the tables and began to speak to the man Tonks assumed was Sid. The old man glanced at Tonks and then knelt down to pull out a dusty bottle. After ordering himself a Firewhisky, Rob returned with two drinks in his grasp.
“He had cider?” she said in disbelief as Rob placed the glass of amber liquid in front of her.
“Not exactly,” Rob replied. “This is Pixie Cider. Sid had a few bottles left. It’s not quite the same as Muggle cider “ apparently it’s a bit stronger, so you’d better just have the one.”
Tonks took a sip. It was sparkling and seemed to dance on her tongue. It had a sweeter, more enticing aroma than the cider she was used to.
“Thank you,” she said. “He’s right; it is strong. Thanks for the warning.”
“Hmm, I don’t try to get girls drunk, you know,” said Rob, frowning slightly.
Tonks blushed. “I-I wasn’t suggesting that,” she muttered.
Rob stopped frowning and moved a bit closer to her. “So, tell me about your cousin, then.”
Tonks looked at him warily. He seemed to be genuinely interested, but she couldn’t be sure. Her mind careered back to that day she took James’ record and Rita Skeeter’s article. He was a journalist, after all. “Nothing to tell really,” she said noncommittally. “Sirius Black’s my mum’s cousin, that’s all.”
“Hmm, you seemed very defensive about him in the office,” Rob replied. “Look, I know what you’re thinking. I’m a journalist and you don’t trust me, but...”
“Hey, Rob, my man, what are you doing here?” Jacob Proudfoot suddenly appeared in front of them amidst the crowded bar. “And with Nymphadora, too. You are honoured, Rob. The old charm’s still working.”
“Piss off, Proudfoot,” Rob said, sounding annoyed that he’d been interrupted. “We’re talking.”
“Aww, we wanted to join you, Rob. It’s not often Nymphadora deigns to join us for a drink.” He pulled up a bar stool and whistled to Edwin and three girls who Tonks recognised from the Magical Law Enforcement office. They’d obviously been able to finish on time and had gone home to get changed. They gazed at Rob and then looked disparagingly at her. Suddenly, Tonks, dressed in her usual scruffy jeans and T shirt, felt blatantly out of place.
She took a swig at her drink again. Merlin, it really was strong! Her head felt slightly swimmy. Edwin Savage and the girls came over and pulled up seats. They had all obviously been friends for a while as they began a riotous conversation about people they knew and places they’d been to. Tonks listened as she sipped her drink; her social life was so limited that she had nothing to contribute. At one point Rob tried to include her in a conversation about holidays, but that reminded her of Romania so she simply smiled and shook her head. One of the girls, a trainee Law Enforcer with dark hair and a thin-lipped smile, raised her eyebrows presumably in surprise that Rob was with someone like Tonks. The girl started to ask Rob questions, thus ensuring that his head was turned towards her and not Tonks. At that, Tonks decided she’d had enough.
“Err, Rob, I really should be going. I’ve got to be up early in the morning,” she said as she stood up, leaning slightly into the table. “Thanks for the drink.”
Rob stood as she left the table. “Tonks,” he said, “I’ll walk you back.”
“No,” she replied. She looked back at the table and saw that the brunette girl was already moving into her place. “I’ll be fine. I can Apparate back. I really do have an early start tomorrow.”
She started to walk to the door but bumped into a table, sending the glasses flying. “Sorry, sorry,” she muttered. She could hear Proudfoot and one of the girls laughing and had to take a deep breath in an attempt to control her temper. She felt a hand on her arm. It was Rob.
“Don’t go,” he murmured. “Stay and talk to me.”
Turning back around to face him, Tonks looked over his shoulder at the table they’d been sitting at. It had been nice to be out for a change, instead of always moping at home, but Proudfoot’s interruption had put paid to any cosy chat she’d hoped to have.
“It’s been fun, Rob,” she began, “but I do have to be up early tomorrow.”
She began to walk to the door again, but he caught her hand. “Another time, yes? And next time I’ll make sure that dickhead can’t join us.” He smiled warmly at her and she saw something approaching admiration in his eyes.
“Um, yes, that would be great. Thanks, Rob,” she replied, slightly breathlessly.
She smiled as she walked out of the pub and Apparated back to her flat.
I’ve just been asked on a second date, she thought. I’m finally having some fun.
***
Tonks woke at four-thirty and hurriedly got washed and dressed so she could Floo to the office. The first person she saw, lounging on her chair, was Rob.
“Uh, hi,” she said. “Are you coming with us?”
“Yep,” he replied. “I’m what is known as an independent witness. I’m there to make sure you don’t plant anything in Malfoy’s house.”
“I wouldn’t do that,” Tonks gasped.
He grinned. “I know that, Tonks, but Lucius Malfoy won’t be able to argue bias if I’m there.”
“Do you know him?” Tonks asked.
“Not well,” Rob replied. “Gus used to hang around with him, I think. He’s very influential.”
She heard a familiar clunking sound behind her. “When you’ve quite finished gossiping,” Moody growled, “we can get to work.” He looked her up and down. “Change your hair to something more conventional, Nymphadora. You’re my secret weapon and I’d rather choose my moment to unleash you.”
She stared at him, puzzled by the request, but did as she was asked. Winking at Arthur, she changed her hair to Weasley red. It swung down to her shoulders, and, as she tied it back, she noticed Rob giving her a smile of approval.
At five o’clock on the dot, Moody, Arthur, Rob, and Tonks Apparated to a field just behind Malfoy Manor. Much to Tonks disappointment (because she’d imagined that a raid would involve landing on the front doorstep and screaming Confringio! at the door), they couldn’t Apparate directly into Malfoy Manor or the grounds, as it was protected from wizard intruders. But Moody had worked out that they could sneak in through the back.
Tonks took in the sight of Malfoy Manor. It was an imposing building surrounded by carefully manicured lawns and high hedges. She’d never been here, but Tonks felt as if she knew the place. Her mother had photographs from a ball she’d attended here once. Tonks remembered from when she’d seen the photographs the lavish lifestyle the Malfoys seemed to have. Her mother, photographed with her two sisters when she’d been just seventeen, had been wearing a stunning green silk dress. She’d looked beautiful, but her eyes had showed the sadness she was feeling. Andromeda had told her later that it was at that ball she’d realised that her family would never accept Ted. She’d been forced to dance with partner after partner “ all Purebloods “ until the evening was over.
“None of them made my heart sing, Nymphadora,” Andromeda had told her daughter one night as she tucked her up in bed. “There was only ever one man for me, and that’s your dad.”
Tonks shook her head. ‘Hearts singing’, indeed, she thought, and wondered if her mum made that up so she’d stay away from boys until she was older.
“Tonks,” whispered Arthur, “we’re about to go in.”
Arthur was looking down at her, smiling kindly. He was plainly pleased to be here. She knew that there was a history of enmity between the Weasleys and the Malfoys; Charlie had told her that his dad had never believed Lucius Malfoy’s story about the Imperius curse.
The four of them walked through the field and then snuck through a gap in the bushes. Tonks caught her robe on a branch and cursed as it snagged.
“Hush,” whispered Moody. He didn’t move at all, but simply watched the house. His magical eye was trained on the main window at the back. “Okay, there’s no one up except the house-elf. Let’s get in there.”
He marched purposefully up the lawn; the other three followed. Tonks noticed that Rob had a small notebook and quill with him. At the back door of the house, Moody stopped, listened briefly through the keyhole, and then thumped on the wooden door.
“LUCIUS MALFOY!” he roared. “This is Alastor Moody from the Auror Department. I have authorisation to search your premises. Open up “ IMMEDIATELY!”
Tonks could hear a flurry of footsteps from behind the door before it creaked open. Expecting to be looking at her uncle, Tonks was surprised to be confronted with a house-elf. She’d not had much contact with house-elves, although Mr Crouch occasionally brought one into work to carry his important papers. His house-elf was always neatly dressed and very conscientious, obviously happy with her lot. But this poor creature, she thought, is thoroughly miserable. It had what looked like an old pillow case tied around one shoulder, and a small tear at the side had been patched up. But it wasn’t his apparel that appalled her, rather his demeanour. The terrified looks he shot their way intensified when heavier footsteps were heard coming down the stairs.
“DOBBY!” shouted a man’s voice. “Do not open that door!”
The man stopped as he saw Moody push his way past the house-elf and glared. Arthur followed Moody into the home, and Lucius Malfoy sneered upon seeing him.
“I hope they’re paying you overtime for this, Weasley,” he said snidely. His eyes flicked over to Tonks who was clutching at her torn robes. “Is this another one of your offspring in hand-me-down robes?”
Tonks glared at him. Moody, however, chuckled. “No, Lucius, that’s not one of Arthur’s children. She’s from the Auror Department.”
Lucius’ eyes moved to the fourth member of the group and his manner relaxed.
“Robert Avery,” he drawled. “What brings you here? I heard you were working for the Daily Prophet.”
“I am,” replied Rob as he walked into the kitchen. He held out his hand to Lucius. “I’m here as an observer.”
Lucius shook the proffered hand then turned back to Moody. “What ridiculous pretext do you have for bothering me now?”
“Information received, Malfoy,” Moody replied. “We’re going to search your house.” He handed an authorisation letter over to Lucius, who glanced at it. Rufus Scrimgeour’s signature was writ large along the bottom. Lucius glared at Moody again, but moved to one side.
“Search wherever you want, Moody, but please do not disturb my wife until she’s dressed.”
As Tonks followed Moody into the main part of the house, she caught Lucius’ expression. He was smirking very faintly. He looked across at her and his face became a mask, and then he turned his attention to the wretched house-elf still standing at the door.
“Breakfast, Dobby,” he said coldly, “is to be ready on a tray for your Mistress in thirty minutes. I shall take mine down here. NOW!”
They began a rather laborious search in the dining room. Rifling through drawers and cupboards, they found nothing more innocuous than family photograph albums. Tonks picked one up and began to flick through. There was Narcissa leaving for Hogwarts, her white-blond hair tightly plaited, and her robes clean and pressed. Bellatrix, at sixteen, stared proudly at the camera, tossing her hair out her eyes. There seemed to be a hand across the younger girl’s shoulder; Tonks gasped because she knew the hand belonged to her mother. Narcissa had erased her sister from the photograph.
I shouldn’t be surprised, she thought. And I won’t let it upset me.
“Why on earth do the Ministry think my family photograph albums are so important?” said a cool voice from the doorway.
They stopped what they were doing. Arthur stood up and nodded slightly to Narcissa Malfoy who stood imperiously in front of them, sipping from a delicate china tea cup. Tonks put the album back in the drawer and then walked over to a grand piano, on which were several framed photographs.
Narcissa glanced at her, unperturbed. “Do be careful,” she ordered. “Those frames are expensive.”
“Mmm,” replied Tonks as she picked up one of the photographs. “Is this your son?”
Narcissa inclined her head; Tonks looked across at Moody who was now standing by the fireplace, watching the two women. He smiled slightly at her.
“There’s quite a resemblance, isn’t there?” Tonks said boldly. She turned to face Narcissa directly and, screwing up her face, she changed her long red hair to a short, white-blond crop. It emphasised her pale heart shaped face and dark eyes. She held up the photograph of Draco; they could have been twins.
“Who are you?” whispered Narcissa.
“Nymphadora Tonks,” she replied, and held out her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you at last, Aunt Cissy.”
At the use of her childhood nickname, Narcissa blanched and dropped the teacup she’d been holding. It shattered on the floor. She walked briskly over to Tonks and snatched the photograph away from her. “You stay away from my son!”
Tonks smiled at her and changed her hair to pink curls. “No touching family reunion, then? That’s a shame; I’d have liked to meet my cousin.”
She stopped talking as Lucius Malfoy had appeared in the doorway. His eyes flickered malevolently over Tonks’ hair and face. “Andromeda’s freak child, I presume.”
Arthur moved swiftly across the room and placed a protective hand on Tonks’ shoulder. She looked at him and smiled. “It’s okay, Arthur. Let Uncle Lucius have his say.”
Lucius’ eyes narrowed as he looked at her again, and then, taking Narcissa’s arm, he turned his back on them. “Come, Narcissa,” he said in clipped tones. “Let them continue their search. You’ll find that it’s a wasted journey though, Moody.”
Moody watched as the Malfoys left, and then swore under his breath. “He wouldn’t let us search if he thought we’d discover something,” he growled. “We’ll give it another hour, but I doubt he’s been careless.” He glanced at Tonks. “Nice job, Nymphadora, if anything was going to unsettle them, it would be you.”
Tonks smiled back. In truth, although she presented a calm front, her insides were churning. There were always idiots like Proudfoot, and suspicious witches like Catalina, but she could cope with them. Narcissa’s fear of her upset her far more than Lucius’ obvious distaste.
They finished up after another two hours. Moody and Arthur walked ahead whilst Rob and Tonks dawdled.
“Did that upset you?” he asked. “Lucius Malfoy calling you a freak.”
She snorted. “I’m used to it, Rob. And they’re not really family to me.” She sighed. “I’ve got my mum, my dad, my nan,”“she closed her eyes, trying to block out the picture that was running through her head of a six-year-old girl clutching at her cousin’s waist as they zoomed through the streets of London“ “and they mean more to me than anything.”
They walked in silence for a while until they reached the field where they would Apparate back to London. Rob shifted on his feet slightly, and then touched her hand.
“I ... err ... I’ve got two tickets for the Holyhead Harpies game, and I know you like Quidditch so I wondered ...”
Tonks gasped excitedly; the match had been sold out weeks ago. “I’d love to go to the match. The Harpies are my favourite team, and I’d given up any hope of getting a ticket.”
“So there’s no jealous lover in the vicinity about to come out and hex me if I ask you out again?” he asked cheerfully.
Tonks tilted her head to one side and smiled a touch ruefully. “No,” she said at last. “There’s no jealous lover anywhere.”
End Notes:
Aww, come on. Give the girl a break, she deserves some fun, doesn't she?
Chapter 10 - The Seeker by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
After the unsuccessful raid on Malfoy Manor, Tonks is looking forward to her date with Rob at the Holyhead Harpies sellout match with the Appleby Arrows.
She knew the match would be a thriller, but wasn't expecting the Harpies new Seeker to make quite such an impression.
The Sexual Situations warning kicks in now!
Thank you so much to Azhure for beta'ing this chapter.
The Saturday following the unsuccessful raid on Malfoy Manor, Tonks slept in. Sun was already streaming through the skylight, and as it caressed her face, she opened her eyes in alarm. Hastily, Tonks grabbed her watch and checked the time. “Merlin!” she yelped and quickly jumped out of bed and into her bathroom.
She cursed herself for forgetting to charm the water last night as the lukewarm shower drenched her. Wrapping herself in a towel, she grabbed her wand and began to charm-dry her hair. Although she could change her style at will, her hair appreciated the odd bit of artificial styling. Tonks looked at herself in the mirror, and, giggling, remembered Charlie’s look of admiration when she’d made an effort and turned her hair long and blonde. Then she frowned slightly “ perhaps if she’d made an effort with Remus ... Tonks shook her head. It was not the time to dwell on what could have been.
I have a date, she thought. I’m going to the Harpies match with a man who is not only good-looking but fun! Stop thinking about someone else who barely knows you exist.
Since the raid on Malfoy Manor, she’d been out with Rob, again to the Dragon’s Lair. Rob had discovered that Proudfoot and Savage would be elsewhere and the two of them had spent a pleasant evening together. Rob was witty and attentive, and Tonks felt herself responding to his charm.
She dressed quickly in some newish jeans and her Holyhead Harpies shirt. Then, she looked back in the mirror and, grinning slightly, matched her hair to the dark green shirt. As a final touch, Tonks wrinkled her nose and changed the ends gold to match the talon on the front of the shirt. After a quick cup of tea, she put on her cloak, stowed her wand and turned around to Apparate to a copse near the Harpies’ stadium.
As Tonks landed, she felt her ankle turn over. “Bollocks!” she hissed as she fell bottom first onto the wet grass. Her cloak had at least protected her jeans from the mud. Gingerly, Tonks flexed her ankle, hoping it wasn’t anything more than a strain. She heard a crack nearby and peered up through the gloom of the trees to see Rob Avery appear.
“Do you need a hand?” he said, laughing as he knelt down next to her.
Tonks blushed slightly but accepted his hand. The hood fell down revealing her hair and she smiled shyly, waiting for his response. Rob blinked and took a step backwards.
“Err, how... original,” he said at last.
Tonks felt deflated by his obvious lack of enthusiasm. “Don’t you like it?”
“It’s not that,” he said kindly. “It’s just that the tickets I have are for one of the new boxes, and they’ve introduced a dress code.” He glanced at her jeans and shirt. “I guess we could swap tickets or something.”
“Merlin, Rob! You should have told me. I feel a right idiot now.” Tonks pulled out her wand and began to siphon off the mud from her cloak.
“There’s still time for you to change if you Apparate now,” Rob suggested. “I’ll come with you.”
Tonks sighed. She actually didn’t possess a skirt, preferring to live in jeans and t-shirts when not in her purple Auror robes. Then a thought struck her. “I tell you what -- I’ll go to my parents’. My mum’s bound to have something suitable. You can wait here, if you’d rather.”
She began to turn when Rob grabbed her arm. “No, I’ll come along too,” she heard him say as they Apparated to her parents’ house.
“Mum, Dad,” Tonks called as she let Rob into the house. “Are you home?”She turned to Rob. “I don’t think they’re here, so do you want to wait in the lounge? I’ll be down in a minute.” Tonks started to open the door to the lounge when she heard a sound coming from the kitchen.
“Dora!” cried Ted. “What a lovely surprise; I thought you said you were working this weekend. Dromeda, it’s Dora.”
Tonks thanked her stars that she was able to morph away the blush that she could feel forming on her cheeks. In her haste to get here, she’d forgotten that she’d told her parents she was working this weekend so couldn’t see them as planned. Her mother appeared, wearing an apron, which she hastily removed when she saw Rob.
“Darling, what are you doing here?”Andromeda walked forwards and kissed Tonks on the cheek and murmured, “Introduce us to this young man, Nymphadora.”
“Oh... erm, sorry,” stuttered Tonks. “Mum, Dad, this is Rob “ a colleague.”
“You’re an Auror, are you, Rob?” asked Ted, gesturing him into the lounge.
“No,” replied Rob. “I’m a journalist, but I’ve been assigned to the Auror department. You may have read some of my articles.”
“Rob Avery, is it?” asked Andromeda, and when he nodded she continued, “Yes, I’ve been following your articles. It’s the only way I get to know what my daughter’s doing.”
Tonks hovered in the doorway and cleared her throat. “Um, Mum, I need to borrow some clothes. Is that okay?”
“Of course,” replied Andromeda. “I’ll help you. Make yourself useful, Ted, and get this young man a drink.”
Tonks walked up the stairs and into her parents’ bedroom, conscious that her mum was dying to ask her all about Rob. Andromeda pulled open her wardrobe door. “I take it this is a date, then?” she asked and Tonks nodded. “Darling, you are allowed to cancel on us for a date; you don’t have to make up stories about work. We’re not ogres!”
Tonks grinned at her. “I know. It just felt odd, that’s all. And I know you wanted to know about the raid.”
Andromeda walked over to Tonks and hugged her tight. “I’m just pleased to see you smile. You’ve had a hard time at work, haven’t you?”
Tonks shrugged. “It’s okay now. Some of the wizards are still incredibly sexist, but it’s getting better.” She walked over to the wardrobe. “Mum, apparently what I’m wearing isn’t suitable for the top box at the Harpies game. There’s a new dress code, or something. Have you got a skirt or dress I can borrow?”
Andromeda began to pull out some of her clothes. She was shorter than her daughter, but they were much the same build. “How about this?” she said, holding up a dark green velvet skirt and a silver top.
“Too Slytherin, Mum!” Tonks complained. “How about that black skirt and purple top? They’d be okay, wouldn’t they?”
Andromeda pursed her lips. “It’s a bit short on you, darling,” she said as Tonks wriggled into the skirt which fell about four inches above her knees, showing off her slim legs.
“Nah, it’s fine,” replied Tonks. “Plus, I’ll have my cloak on. Right, my hair “ what should I do?”
“You’re changing your hair?” asked Andromeda with surprise in her voice.
Tonks turned to look at her mother, who had stopped putting the clothes away and was staring at her. “Err, yeah, what’s so odd about that?”
Andromeda smirked and went back to folding up the discarded clothes. “Nothing, darling. It’s nice to see you making an effort for a man, that’s all. And Rob seems very nice.”
Tonks wasn’t quick enough this time to stop the blush spreading over her features. “Stop it, Mum. It’s not like that. He’s a friend, that’s all.”
Andromeda gave her daughter a very knowing look as she left the room. “If you say so, Nymphadora.”
***
Andromeda insisted that they stay for a drink and began to ask Rob an awful lot of questions about his job. Ted was fairly silent, but smiled at Tonks when she began to show how exasperated she was with her mother. Finally, when Andromeda’s interrogation reached the subject of Rob’s future prospects, Tonks leapt to her feet and, kissing her parents goodbye, insisted that they leave.
“We don’t have to leave on my account,” Rob said as they walked into the garden.
“No, but we had to on mine,” Tonks told him. “I don’t want to miss the match. Before we go, though, is this hair colour okay?” She shook dark brown locks at him and he smiled.
“It looks lovely, Nymph... sorry ... Tonks,” he replied.
They arrived back at the Harpies’ stadium shortly after the match had started. “Merlin, we’ve missed the start,” Tonks muttered. “Thanks a lot, Mum.”
“Hey, slow down,” said Rob and he reached out to hold her hand. He pulled her towards him. “I’m sure we haven’t missed anything important.”
Tonks felt his arm creep around her waist and then he lowered his head and dropped a very gentle kiss on her cheek. It wasn’t a total surprise to her, but she was unsure how to respond. She looked into his eyes and was heartened to see they were smiling. His hand cupped her chin and his lips found hers. For a moment, Tonks froze, but then she relaxed. His hand crept to the back of her head and his thumb started caressing her neck. Perhaps sensing her compliance, Rob increased the pressure slightly. She closed her eyes, wondering oddly why she wasn’t enjoying this as much as she probably should be. Rob was good-looking, he was intelligent, and there was no doubt that he could kiss, but as he began to tease open her lips with his tongue, she drew back. Rob leant in again and she felt a slight uneasiness in the pit of her stomach. There was a roar from the stadium beyond.
“The m-match,” she stuttered as she pulled away from his embrace. “Come on, Rob. I think we’ve missed a goal.”
Tonks wondered if she’d imagined the fleeting look of annoyance that flashed in his eyes, but a moment later, Rob was grinning at her. He flipped her nose. “Yes, Nymphadora, we mustn’t miss the match.”
“Tonks!” she growled at him. Rob laughed.
***
He led her through the stands to one of the top boxes. The Harpies, in a bid to increase revenue, had renovated one of their old stands and converted many of the seats into private boxes. There were fewer seats near them and more space to stretch out. A waitress service was available, so Rob quickly ordered some drinks for them both and the waitress returned with a bottle of elf-wine. Tonks accepted a glass dubiously, feeling it was much too early in the day for her to be drinking. She looked around her. It was certainly more spacious, and vastly more comfortable, than her normal position in the stands, but she felt almost absent from the game. The people around her didn’t seem to be that interested in either the Harpies or the Appleby Arrows “ their opponents today. She could see Cornelius Fudge nearby talking to an obviously wealthy wizard -- neither seemed to be watching the game. Sighing at the lack of atmosphere, she turned her eyes back to the action.
The Harpies had just scored again, making them twenty “ nil up. One of the Arrows’ Beaters, with a determined look on his face, fired a Bludger at the Seeker who was hovering above him. She dodged out of the way and flew around the stadium, eyes scanning the air as she looked for the Snitch.
“What position did you play?”asked Rob as he held out the bottle to fill up her glass. Tonks shook her head; she’d barely had a sip of her drink and certainly didn’t need a refill.
“Uh, Chaser,” she replied, not turning eyes from the game.
“Were you any good?” he said after a while.
There was a lull in the game, so Tonks turned around. Rob was sitting side-on, looking directly at her and paying no attention to the match.
“I had my moments!” she said. Tonks smiled at the memory of her record. “I was offered a contract with Puddlemere, actually.”
“Really?” Rob sounded surprised. “Why didn’t you sign?”
She shrugged. “I wanted to be an Auror, and Quidditch isn’t a career that lasts very long. Plus, I was only any good when I got angry.”
Rob raised an eyebrow. “I can imagine. But some players go on well into their thirties, don’t they? I mean, the Harpies have just signed someone from the Calais Cygnes, and she’s older.”
“Who do you mean?” asked Tonks with a puzzled look on her face. She thought she knew all of the Harpies’ players.
Rob pointed upwards. “The Seeker there only signed in the last few days. Cherith Hughes was injured during the week, so they needed a replacement fast.” He laughed at the look of bewilderment on Tonks’ face. “It was in the Prophet this morning that she was playing. Didn’t you look at the paper today?”
Tonks shook her head. “No, I overslept and didn’t read a thing.” She scanned the sky until she found the Harpies’ Seeker “ a lithe woman with blonde curls. “Who is she, then, a French International or something?”
“No, she’s British, just been playing for the Cygnes all her career. Martha Macdonald,” Rob replied.
At that moment, the Harpies Seeker flew very near them. Tonks looked straight at her and gave a gasp. It has to be the same girl in my photograph, she thought. Sirius’ girlfriend, Martha. Tonks knew she wasn’t mistaken. She had memorised every inch of the faces in that photograph, hoping, perhaps, to bring them back to life and discover the truth.
“Are you okay?” asked Rob curiously.
Tonks took a slug of her wine. A sudden longing for all she’d lost with Sirius threatened to overwhelm her. She could feel a lump in her throat; she needed someone to confide in, but Rob was not the right person. Merlin, Remus! I wish you were here. Tonks turned back to the match. “I’m fine, Rob,” she replied, a brittle smile sweeping across her face. “Come on, Harpies!”
Her cheer caused the Minister and his guest to turn around. “Can you keep it down, Tonks?” Rob said in a stage whisper. “I don’t think they’re used to such enthusiasm.”
“Well, what are they doing here then?” she snapped irritably. “What’s the point in coming to a match if you can’t be bothered to watch it?” She rubbed at her eyes, aware that she was sounding ungrateful, and turned back to Rob. “I’m sorry. I’m not much fun, am I?”
Rob grinned at her and squeezed her hand. “You’re passionate about the game, I can see that.”
Tonks smiled warmly back. She really did appreciate the effort Rob had put in to making this a special date, but she knew she’d have been happier in the stands with the real fans. Tonks turned back to the match and gasped as she saw a Bludger whip its way towards Martha. The Seeker dodged nimbly out of the way and the crowd cheered. Cherith Hughes was a popular player, but Martha was winning them over.
A man approached them. He was older, probably in his thirties and, as Rob turned around, she noticed a family resemblance.
“Gus, what are you doing here?” cried Rob enthusiastically.
“Keeping an eye on you, baby brother,” replied Gus. He bent down, picked up Tonks’ hand and raised it to his lips. “Angus Avery, at your service, ma’am.”
Tonks smiled but removed her hand. In her mind, she could see the file Moody held on Angus Avery. The extent of his Death Eater involvement had been clear to so many of them, but somehow he’d escaped Azkaban.
“This is Nymphadora, Gus,” Rob introduced her formally. “Alone of all the people in this box, she actually wants to watch the game.” Rob bent down and whispered in her ear, “I’ll take him away and let you watch for a while.”
Tonks saw him lean forward to kiss her on the lips. Instinctively, she turned her head so he ended up brushing her on the cheek instead. Rob frowned slightly, but walked off with his brother to talk to the Minister and his guest.
Tonks went back to the game, but she couldn’t concentrate on the score. The only person she was watching was Martha Macdonald. She flew well and with determination. Younger players may have had the edge in agility, but Martha was just as fast, just as strong and far more determined. A cheer from the Appleby fans brought her attention back to the game. Damn! she thought, they’ve equalised.
“Rob thought you’d like a top-up,” said a voice behind her. Tonks turned around and saw Gus holding a bottle of wine out towards her.
“Oh, thank you,” she replied politely, “but, honestly, I’m fine. I don’t drink much.”
“Nonsense,” replied Gus as he started to fill up her glass. Tonks hastily put her hand over the glass, but he didn’t stop and the wine trickled over her fingers. Gus laughed. “That’s a waste, Nymphadora. You should have accepted the drink.”
“I said I was fine,” Tonks said through gritted teeth. She could feel her temper rising. Gus seemed far too much like the arrogant prats she worked with. She dried her hand on her skirt, causing it to rise a few more inches above her knee. Gus smirked and she hastily pulled the skirt back into place. Rob walked over, carrying two glasses of what looked like Firewhisky, and she heaved a sigh of relief. He ruffled her hair and sat down next to her.
“I’m taking good care of her, Rob,” said Gus.
“Hmm, I can see that,” replied Rob as he looked at the wine spilt on the floor. “You must excuse my brother, Nymphadora “ he hasn’t outgrown his schooldays.”
“Tonks,” she replied automatically.
Gus frowned. “Tonks? That sounds familiar, but it’s not a wizarding name...”
“I’ve been writing about her for the Prophet,” interrupted Rob, “that’s why the name’s so familiar.”
Tonks looked from one brother to the other. Gus was still looking at her through narrowed eyes and Rob was flushing slightly. “I’m a trainee Auror,” she explained. There was a shout from the crowd below, and pleased at the distraction, she returned to the game. “Yes! Harpies score. Come on, girls, you can win this,” she yelled into the air. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Rob wincing slightly. Stuffy tosser, she thought. If he thought I was going to be quiet when it’s my team playing, then, Merlin, he doesn’t know me at all.
“You have a knack for digging out the classy ones, Rob. Oh ... and what’s this?” Gus stopped as Tonks turned to face him. The feelings of annoyance that she’d been burying deep inside her had surfaced suddenly, and, without her realising, she’d morphed her hair blue. “A Metamorphmagus, Rob? This time you’ve surpassed yourself.”
“Yeah, I’m a Metamorphmagus,” Tonks said softly, and this time she willed her hair to turn a deep pink. Rob placed a hand on her arm. The conciliatory gesture made her angrier. Tonks was sick of having to apologise and explain herself. Prejudice had dogged her childhood, her schooldays and now her career, and she didn’t see why she had to put up with it from a former Death Eater. Tonks opened her mouth to hurl some abuse at him when a roar from the stand below her stopped her. She could hear the commentator.
“And it’s Macdonald, diving for the Snitch... Macdonald for the Harpies in her first match back in Britain... She swoops ahead of the Arrows’ Seeker, who’s trailing behind. Macdonald with her hand outstretched... YES! She does it. Macdonald takes the Snitch. It’s a victory for the Holyhead Harpies!”
Tonks shrieked with delight and in celebration she screwed up her face, turning her hair dark green with a gold streak down the centre. “That’s my girls!” she whooped. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Gus Avery looking at her distastefully. Rob, however, seemed amused, if a touch resigned. She put her arm round him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for bringing me, Rob. It’s been brilliant!”
He put his arm around her waist and pulled her against him. “I’m glad you had fun and, uh...” he whispered in her ear, “I’m sorry about Gus. He gets a bit loud when he’s had a few too many. He doesn’t mean it.”
Tonks looked away and back onto the pitch. The Harpies were doing a lap of honour, so she disentangled herself from Rob’s embrace to watch them. As they landed, she saw the crowd swarm onto the pitch to collect autographs. Martha, as the newest player and relative unknown, attracted some attention, but she wasn’t as popular as the regulars, and Tonks noticed the teenage fans left her alone. “Do you mind if I go down amongst the crowd for a bit?” She grinned and made herself blush. “I’d like to get some autographs.”
Rob shrugged good-naturedly, but, she noticed with relief, did not offer to accompany her, preferring to stay with his brother and the drink. She ran down the steps, almost tripping as she went. Tonks scanned the pitch, but it was impossible to pick out any individuals, because the crowd were milling around everywhere. So she made her way towards the dressing room where she figured Martha would soon be heading. Sure enough, after a short time, the slight, blonde woman walked towards her.
Tonks cleared her throat. “Miss Macdonald, could I have a word with you?”
Martha looked her way. “Do you want an autograph?”
“Err, not exactly,” Tonks replied. She began to shuffle on her feet, feeling embarrassed. “Um, I think you knew my cousin, Sirius Black?”
“Ah, you must be Nymphadora Tonks,” Martha said sagely. Tonks did a double take.
“You know me?”
“I was warned you might be on your way to see me,” Martha said and she started walking towards the dressing room. “I don’t know what I can tell you, though.”
Some of the crowd, catching sight of the new Seeker, began to swarm towards them. Tonks grabbed Martha’s arm. “What do you mean you were warned about me?”
Martha shook herself free but stayed where she was. “Remus Lupin told me you were on a mission,” she explained. “I’m quite surprised it’s taken you this long to catch up with me.” She looked at the approaching fans. “Look, go and wait around the back of the dressing room. I promise I’ll talk to you.”
“You’ve seen Remus?” Tonks’ eyes widened and she scanned the pitch. “Is he here? Is he back from Romania?” But Martha was surrounded by fans and didn’t answer. With her heart pounding hard, as if it wanted to break through her rib cage, Tonks walked to the dressing room and sat on the steps. She felt suddenly light-headed and clammy; her stomach tingled with anticipation. Remus, Remus, are you here? She gulped at the air, the memory of their one kiss still scorched on her lips.
“Are you all right?” Tonks peeped from beneath her fringe and saw Martha crouching by her side. Martha sat on the steps beside her. “Go on,” she said gently, “ask away.”
Tonks nodded and tried to concentrate. She took some deep breaths and clenched her hands in an effort to gain mastery of her emotions. “When did you see Remus?” she muttered at last.
“In the summer,” replied Martha. “He was passing through France and picked up some work with the Cygnes “ they needed a record keeper and he was always conscientious at school, so I recommended him.”
Tonks began pulling at the hem of her skirt. It was cold and she was shivering, her thin cloak unable to keep out the breeze that was beginning to pick up. Martha cupped one of Tonks’ hands in hers. “What do you want from me? Are you still convinced Sirius is innocent? Because, if you are, I should warn you that there’s nothing I can do to help you.”
Tonks looked into Martha’s pale blue eyes and felt a wave of sorrow engulf her. “No one ever can,” she said huskily as she tried to stop the tears welling in her own eyes. “I haven’t given up on him “ I can’t, but ... but... I feel as if I’ve been banging my head against a Shield Charm for the past few years. I’m not a child anymore ... I know that I can’t fight evidence as convincing as Professor Dumbledore’s testimony simply because I don’t like it.
“I just want to ask you about the Sirius you knew. I only met him once, but I can’t forget that day. It’s as clear as if it happened last week. Please, please, Martha. Will you just tell me about him?”
“There’s not much to tell. We started dating in my fifth year. It was a wonderful ride -- while it lasted. Sirius moved on.” She looked into the distance. “I moved on. I left Hogwarts and signed for the Cygnes.” She sighed. “I was abroad when it happened... when James and Lily were murdered. I sometimes wonder if I could have stopped him “ Sirius, I mean “ we’d stayed friends... It was very hard to stay angry with that boy for long...” Martha grinned as some memories began to surface. “We had kept in touch, so after it happened, I went over and over his letters. I mean, surely I should have been able to see the treachery and turmoil in his words. But I didn’t spot it. I never realised he was such a good actor.” Martha laughed bitterly.
“Tonks!” called a voice from the crowd. “Tonks, where are you?”
“Oh, shit!” muttered Tonks self-consciously. “That’s my ... um ... date. I’ll have to go.”
Martha followed Tonks’ gaze and gave a start. “You’re dating an Avery?” she said in surprise.
“Well, sort of,” replied Tonks. “I mean, Rob brought me today, but it’s only our second date. I’m not sure...”
She was cut short by Martha clutching her arm. “I was at school with Angus Avery. He’s bad news. Up to his neck with the Death Eaters. Merlin knows how he escaped Azkaban. His friend, Mulciber, wasn’t so lucky.”
“Rob says he’s innocent,” retorted Tonks.
“And you’re with him because you think Sirius is innocent, too.” Martha sounded scornful. Her fingernails dug into Tonks’ arm. “Look, I genuinely don’t know about Sirius. In all honesty, he was the very last person I thought would turn to You-Know-Who -- but Angus Avery was always evil. You need to be very careful if you’re mixing with that family, Tonks.”
Tonks looked up to see Rob still scanning the area and calling her name. “I’m not stupid,” she hissed. “And I’m not in love with him or anything... Hold on ... you called me Tonks. How did you know to call me that and not Nymphadora?”
“Remus mentioned it,” Martha replied and grinned impishly. “We went out for a drink once or twice, before he moved on “ as friends, you understand “ and he told me a few things about you, Tonks. One being how much you hated your name.”
“He talked about me?” Tonks goggled.
Martha giggled. “Oh, boy, yes! For a man who was always so reticent at school, Remus was positively chatty about you. You must have made quite an impression on him, because we’d be talking about something completely unrelated, yet he’d suddenly mention you. Then he’d realise and change the subject, but, somehow, a short while later, he’d return to you,” Martha said, smiling at Tonks, and then she laughed. “He also told me about a Quidditch match you played in and how you took James Potter’s record. You must be quite a player.”
Tonks shrugged. “I had a good team behind me.”
Martha snorted. “Typical Hufflepuff! Take some credit for a change. I played in the game when James got the record. It was bloody tough. We thought it would be his for a lot longer, and “ I’m ashamed to say “ we never thought a Hufflepuff would wrench it from him, but I’m bloody glad a witch took it.” She paused. “Remus said you charged around the pitch screaming Sirius’ name.”
Tonks giggled; she felt as though a thousand butterflies were flipping around in her stomach. She grinned as she faced Martha, wanting to ask her more about Remus, but ...
“So, this is where you got to?” Rob said in a slightly slurred voice. He stretched his hand out to Martha. “Hi, I’m Rob Avery. I write for the Daily Prophet. That was a pretty impressive debut, Miss Macdonald.”
Tonks watched as Martha stared at the outstretched hand, and then took it and levered herself up. “Thank you,” Martha replied.”Are you after a quote for the paper, Mr Avery? Because I think my Captain would be the best person to speak to.”
“No, I was looking for my girlfriend, actually. I do hope Nymphadora’s not been pestering you,” Rob said, and Tonks noticed a slightly condescending tone had crept into his voice.
Martha must have heard it too because she answered with an edge to her voice. “Tonks and I have had a very interesting conversation. It’s nice to meet a fan who really understands what the players are going through.” She bent down and, on the pretext of doing up her bootlace, muttered in Tonks’ ear. “Follow my lead.” Straightening up, she headed into the dressing room and then stopped as her hand stayed to the door handle. “I have something inside you might like, Tonks. Some memorabilia. No men allowed, Mr Avery,” she said as he tried to follow them up the steps.
Once inside, Martha led Tonks to the far corner of the dressing room. “You can contact me here anytime, if you want to talk again, and... if you like, I’ll send you some of Sirius’ letters.” She smiled ruefully. “I couldn’t bring myself to throw them away. He mentioned you in them, once or twice.”
“Really?” whispered Tonks in awe.
“Yes, really!” replied Martha, laughing slightly at Tonks’ genuine pleasure and surprise. “One more thing; is it serious between you and Avery?”
Tonks sighed. “I ... err ... don’t know. This is only our second date.”
Martha pulled a face. “You’re not that keen on him, though, as a boyfriend, are you? I wouldn’t have said anything, but it’s fairly obvious you don’t fancy him,” she said as she sat down and pulled off her Quidditch boots.
“Wh-What do you mean?”
Martha smirked. “Well, I don’t know about you, but when I first started going out with Sirius, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.” She laughed as Tonks tried but failed to stop herself from blushing. “I don’t mean actual sex; I mean that I wanted to be with him “ even if it meant just holding hands. You don’t seem to be that bothered about Avery at all.”
Tonks looked at Martha slightly mutinously, but then she nodded. “He’s good-looking and fun to be with -- most of the time -- but he’s not quite right. Do you know what I mean?”
“He’s not Remus Lupin. Is that what you’re trying to say?” Martha put it to her bluntly.
Tonks’ face went even redder. “N-Not at all,” she muttered. “Remus is just a friend.”
Martha stood up and began to walk across to the shower room. She pulled her Harpies shirt over her head and then threw it at Tonks. “Here, have a souvenir of the game,” she said and then paused. “It’s funny, though, because, for someone who wanted to talk to me about their cousin, you asked a lot of questions about his friend.”
Snorting with laughter, Martha said goodbye as Tonks stuttered her thanks for the shirt and left the dressing room.
Rob was waiting outside for her. She noticed he had a slightly impatient look on his face which he smoothed away when he saw her. “Hey, what did she give you?” he asked, taking the shirt from her hands. “Wow, her shirt. She must have taken a shine to you. Okay, are you ready to go?”
Tonks nodded. “Where to?” she asked as he took her arm and led her through the crowd. The fans were starting to disperse now. Tonks could see the Arrows supporters being led off by some Quidditch Stewards brought in to police the match. Rob slowed his pace and brought her up close to him.
“Well, it’s still early, so I thought we could get some lunch somewhere and then see what happens,” he murmured.
Tonks pulled back slightly. “Yeah, that sounds good, but do you mind if I change my clothes? I spilt wine all over this skirt,” she said as she pulled it down again. “Don’t worry; I won’t submit you to any more of my mum’s interrogation. We can go to my place as long as you don’t object to jeans.”
She began walking away, and Rob, catching her arm, kept pace with her. They walked in silence until they reached the copse, and then Tonks turned them both expertly on the spot and they Apparated together.
“Excuse the mess,” she said as they appeared in her kitchen. “I barely had time to eat breakfast, let alone wash up last night’s plates.” She led him into her small living room, took off her cloak and threw it with her wand across an armchair. Tonks could see Rob checking out the place and she sighed slightly. The flat was small, but all she could afford on a Trainee Auror’s wages. What mattered to Tonks was that it was hers and she could shut herself away from the rigours of the day. “I’ll just get changed.”
She began to walk off to her bedroom which was across the hallway but Rob stopped her. “No rush,” he whispered in her ear. “Why don’t you sit here with me for a while?”
“I thought you were hungry,” Tonks began as she tried to step back.
“You could say that,” he replied and pulled her onto the sofa. He bent his head down and began to kiss her. Tonks was unable to turn her head away in time and soon his lips were on hers and his tongue was slipping into her mouth. She could smell Firewhisky fumes on his breath and tried to close her mouth, but his teeth pushed harder against her lips. He manoeuvred himself on top of her and soon his hands were roving over her body. She could feel his fingers trying to undo the buttons on her shirt. His other hand was travelling up her leg, past her knee, and onto her thigh.
“No!” she shouted as she tried to push him off. “Rob, please -- this isn’t what I want." Her protests went unheeded as Rob succeeded in opening the front of her shirt. She could feel his hand pulling down her bra and grabbing at her breast. Then his mouth travelled down as he started to kiss her neck.
Merlin, Merlin, Merlin! What do I do? she thought. “Rob, NO!” Tonks cried again and tried to push him off.
“C’mon, Nymphadora, don’t you want some fun?” he mumured.
“Not like this,” she moaned, and with a superhuman effort, she heaved him off. He fell off the sofa and crashed onto the floor. Tonks stood up abruptly and ran to the armchair, clutching at the undone shirt to shield her body from his eyes. Her wand was in the folds of her cloak; she picked it up and pointed it in his direction.
“I want you to leave now,” she said, her voice shaking. Rob stood up, his nose was bleeding and he wiped it with the back of his hand as he walked towards her. “I will use this, Rob, and you should know I’m an excellent hexer.”
“Must be your Black blood,” Rob said bitterly, not taking his eyes off the wand. Slowly, he bent down and picked up the Harpies’ shirt Martha had given her. “I should have guessed when I saw the shirt she took off for you.” There was no mistaking the insinuation in his voice. “Jacob was right about you all along. You’re not interested in men, are you, Nymphadora?”
Tonks stepped forwards and slowly traced her wand across his face and down his body, stopping at his groin.
“No, Rob,” she hissed, “I’m just not interested in you!”
End Notes:
Sorry for the delay, Catherine. Hopefully I'll get back on track with this now. I love reviews and always respond.
Chapter 11 -Old Stories and New Friends by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
After her awful experience with Rob, Tonks wonders how she'll be able to cope working alongside him. Luckily, an invitation to dinner provides a distraction. And there's a new face in the Auror department.
Thank you to Alyssa (Harry4lif) and Afifa for beta'ing this chapter for me.
Tonks wasn’t sure how she got through the rest of that weekend. Rob made a hasty exit, and after she triple checked the charm-locks on her door, she huddled up in her armchair with a blanket. She shuddered when she looked at the sofa wondering if she’d ever be able relax on it without thinking of him groping her. On the rug, where he’d thrown it, lay Martha’s shirt. Tonks picked it up and pressed it to her cheek. It had been such a good match and talking to Martha afterwards had renewed her belief in Sirius’ innocence. In her wallet was the picture Remus had given her. Now slightly tatty around the edges, Tonks smoothed it out so she could study the faces even more. Martha had been right; Sirius and she had certainly been a tactile couple. Tonks smiled ruefully; they looked happy together and comfortable being that close. She knew Charlie had wanted so much more from their brief relationship but she’d never felt that way about him. She’d enjoyed kissing him, but always drew back when he’d tried to go further.
Rob’s words came back to her “ not interested in men. She furrowed her brow as she considered his bitter statement. Was he right? She studied the photograph again, watching as Sirius’ arm crept around Martha’s waist. She remembered clutching hold of him on the back of his motorbike and laughing with delight as he’d twirled her in the air. If she closed her eyes, she would swear she could smell him. At six years old she’d met her cousin and fallen in love with a god “ no wonder Charlie couldn’t compete.
She glanced once more at the photograph. Remus was smiling in a self-deprecating way. What had they been talking about? she wondered. Then, he looked at her and, even though she knew this photo had been taken over ten years before, it was as though he was staring straight at her. Her mind flew back to that kiss she had shared with him when she was seventeen. She’d responded immediately, not hesitating for a moment. Because it felt right, she thought.
“Damn it, Mum!” she muttered. “I must be more like you than I thought.” She looked up at the clock; it was nearly midnight which meant she’d been sitting here for nearly six hours ruminating on Rob, Martha, Sirius and Remus. “Get a grip, Tonks” she told herself firmly, “and get to bed. Rob Avery is not worth a sleepless night.”
***
Despite the lecture she did not sleep well, although it was not Rob who disturbed her dreams but Sirius. She had dreamt about him since Romania, but less frequently and not with the same intensity. By mastering her Patronus, she seemed to have banished her Dementor dream as well, so when Sirius had entered her mind, it had been as a hazy figure pushing her higher and higher on a swing.
But this was different. This was not the mad-man hauled away by Aurors, or the skull like figure being tormented by Dementors. This was the laughing boy of the photograph, his arm around Martha. And then it changed; he was still laughing but cruelly. Sirius was standing over the bodies of James and Lily, his wand pointed at a small boy in a cradle. He was about to strike when...
“Nooo!” Tonks woke up crying convulsively. Her heaving breaths tore at her insides. Sweat dripped off her, but she was shivering with cold. “It’s a dream, it’s a dream,” she whispered to herself. Wearily, she levered herself out of bed. In the corner of the room, there was a chest of draws. She pulled the bottom drawer out and began to rummage around the tangled mass of clothes. Finally, she found it “ Sirius’ old Gryffindor T-shirt. Holding it up to her face, she inhaled deeply. It was ridiculous to think that she could still smell him; her mother had, after all, washed this shirt many times, but Tonks felt a tangible connection to her cousin. Taking off her pyjama top, she slipped the shirt over her head and looked up to her skylight window. The moon peeped out from behind a cloud. It was not full, she noticed, but just waning. Remus was free for another month. Sighing, Tonks curled up back in bed, closed her eyes, and drifted back to sleep.
It was shortly after six when Tonks woke up again. The sun was not quite up, but she knew, despite her exhaustion that she would not get back to sleep. Tonks padded across her hallway to the kitchen to make a cup of tea. The plates in the sink were still piled high because she’d had no energy or inclination to clear them after Rob had left last night, but now she filled the sink with scorching hot water and began to scrub. It was only when she heard the kettle whistle that she realised she’d been scouring the same plate over and over. Suddenly, something snapped in her; she took the plate and threw it violently against the wall. She picked up another; then a mug joined the smashed fragments. A sliver of china rebounded off the wall and hit her cheek.
“Bloody, bloody, HELL!” Tonks screeched as she clamped a wet cloth to her face to stench the flow of blood. There was a knocking sound on the floor as her neighbour below banged his ceiling with a broom handle to complain about the noise. She sank to the floor in exasperation. Normally she’d have stamped on her floor in response, but her cheek stung and the last thing she wanted was a confrontation with the mad wizard. She got up and moved the still-whistling kettle from the hob, and then, reaching for her wand, Tonks pointed it at the broken fragments. “Reparo!” she muttered half-heartedly and smiled sardonically when the china shards failed to mend properly. Oh, what’s the point? Just buy some new ones, you silly girl. She laughed. For a moment she was reminded strongly of her Nan, who’d never let a man drag her down for long, always emerging with a smile on her face.
“Men, Dora,” Shirley would say. “Can’t live with ‘em; can’t hit ‘em over the head with a shovel and bury ‘em under the patio.”
Tonks giggled. It would soon be Christmas, and she was really looking forward to seeing her Nan again.
***
In trepidation, Tonks went into the office on Monday, unsure what story Rob would have spread around the office. She’d toyed with the idea of sending an owl to say she was ill, but that would only have delayed the inevitable. She knew she was in for a rough ride from the young wizards in the office, and no doubt, when the incident reached Mad-Eye’s ears, he’d sigh in annoyance at her lack of vigilance. Tonks loitered in the atrium for a while, then decided she’d had enough of looking at the Fountain of Brethren so walked purposefully to the office.
It was busy. All the Aurors appeared to have Apparated to the department that morning and Tonks could see the lime-green bowler hat belonging to the Minister perched atop a hat stand outside Rufus Scrimgeour’s office. She looked around for Mad-Eye but he didn’t appear to be there “ and neither was Rob. She sighed gratefully at her reprieve. A wizard dressed in smart Auror robes was sitting at her desk.
“Can I help you?” she asked sharply. He turned round and she found herself looking into a very dark, knowing pair of eyes. She faltered slightly but continued, “That’s my desk.”
“You must be Nymphadora Tonks,” said the man. He stood up and held out his hand. “I’m Kingsley Shacklebolt. It is a pleasure to meet you.” He had a deep, rich voice and smiled as he spoke. Tonks couldn’t help smiling back.
“Oh,” she replied. “I’ve heard of you. Aren’t you based somewhere abroad?”
He smiled again. “I’ve been based in many different wizarding communities around the world but thought now was the time to come back home. It seems I picked an interesting day to return.”
“Yeah, what’s going on?” Tonks asked. “It’s not usually this frenzied on a Monday.”
“Haven’t you heard?” Kingsley asked. He lowered his voice. “There’s a problem at Hogwarts. A student has been Petrified.”
“Another one!” Tonks yelped and then, aware of everyone looking at her, she lowered her voice. “I’d heard about Filch’s cat but assumed it was a prank. I mean, everyone hates Mrs Norris. And then there were rumours about that Muggleborn boy, Colin something, but Fudge told us it was an accident ...”
“But another student cannot be an accident,” replied Kingsley. He lowered his head towards her ear. “And this time a ghost was also affected.”
“A ghost! Which one? Not the Fat Friar?” Tonks asked in horror, remembering the jovial Hufflepuff ghost who always made the first years so welcome. Many times he’d caught her sneaking back into the dorms after curfew but he hadn’t reported her.
Kingsley shook his head. “No, it was the Gryffindor Ghost, Nearly Headless Nick, but the student was from Hufflepuff.”
“Who?” Tonks asked urgently as she scanned her memory for students she knew that were still at Hogwarts.
“Another Muggleborn called Justin Finch-Fletchley,” replied Kingsley. “Why, did you know him?”
Tonks shook her head, feeling ashamed of the relief that had swept through her. It was still a student who had been Petrified after all. “Do they have any idea what happened?”
“No. That’s why Fudge is in with Scrimgeour now. They’re planning a meeting with Professor Dumbledore and some of the Governors of the school.”
Tonks heard a door open behind her and saw Mad-Eye come out with the Minister. “No, Alastor, I really don’t think it wise for you to attend the meeting,” Fudge said, an edge of annoyance in his voice. “After the unfortunate incident at Malfoy Manor, I sincerely doubt Lucius Malfoy will welcome you into his house.”
Moody grunted something that Tonks couldn’t catch and stomped towards her desk, leaving the Minister to walk unescorted to the door. Fudge’s eyes flickered in her direction, but if he recognised her from the Quidditch game two days before, he showed no sign.
“Kingsley,” muttered Moody, “it’s good to have you back, lad.”
Tonks smothered a grin for Kingsley was at least her mother’s age and hardly a lad.
“What are you smirking at, Nymphadora?” Moody’s voice questioned her harshly. Hastily, she rearranged her features so that she looked interested rather than amused. It was unlike Moody to be this grumpy, even if he had just been banned from a meeting by the Minister.
“Nothing,” she replied. “Is everything all right, Mad-Eye?”
“Everything’s bloody wonderful, Nymphadora. But it would be a damn sight better if Trainee Aurors learned to conduct their love lives outside office hours,” Moody growled.
Tonks looked astounded and then gasped in shock as Kingsley stood back from her desk. On top of her stack of papers and remnants of Friday’s sandwich that she’s failed to throw away, lay a package and a letter. Glancing at the writing she realised that they’d been sent by different people. A second look told her that the letter had been sent by Rob. She stuffed it into her pocket, intending to open it later, but as Moody glared at her again and led Kingsley away, she decided to get it over with before it burnt a hole in her robes.
Tonks, she read.
I’ve been recalled to the newspaper offices. It seems this story at Hogwarts is about to become front page news, and although I won’t be covering it, they need me to handle all the lesser news stories. I’m not sure when I’ll see you again, but then I’m not sure you’ll want to see me anymore.
I’m sorry about my appalling behaviour after the Quidditch match. I can only blame the Firewhisky and the fact that you’re too bloody attractive for your own good at times. I’d ask for another chance, but I always got the feeling that I wasn’t exactly your cup of tea anyway.
Take care and once again I’m sorry.
Rob
Tonks re-read the letter. She couldn’t deny the sense of relief that was flooding through her. The thought that he was actually sorry and that he knew he’d behaved badly lifted a weight off her mind. But for him to blame Firewhisky and her attractiveness “ she snorted “ typically he wasn’t laying any of the fault at his own door. She withdrew her wand and prepared to set the letter alight, but fearing it would only catch Proudfoot’s attention, who must have known about the date and the letter, she tore it up surreptitiously and turned her attention to the package.
The writing was unfamiliar, but it was unmistakeably female. Intrigued she slit the end open and pulled out several sheets of paper and a photograph. It was Sirius, by himself, looking moodily at the camera. He was perfectly still and Tonks realised it was a Muggle photograph. There was something brooding about him, not like the laughing man she remembered. She glanced at the accompanying letter.
Dear Tonks,
I thought you might like this photograph I found at home. I remember the day this was taken. Sirius had bought himself a Muggle camera and was posing whilst I took some shots. This was him practising his ‘serious Order Member’ pose. We collapsed into heaps of laughter shortly afterwards. I also enclose some of the letters he wrote to me when I was still at Hogwarts and then later in France. I think I told you on Saturday that our relationship ended after a year “ well, that wasn’t quite true. We would occasionally meet up and talk over old times. He had a great capacity to make me laugh in those dark days.
I hope you enjoyed the match on Saturday, and I am sorry if I spoke out of turn about your boyfriend. I had enough people giving me advice when I was going out with Sirius to know that it’s usually unwarranted and unnecessary.
I must stop writing now as I have a training session and want to get this sent off to you, but I’ll be in London next week for a Harpies book signing. If you would like to meet me for dinner then please do.
Regards,
Martha Macdonald
Tonks rummaged through the papers Martha had enclosed. Sirius’ handwriting shone through and she could see him writing about her. She’s bloody marvellous, Martha, he’d written in one. Such spirit and determination ... zoomed across London on the bike and I could feel her heart pounding with exhilaration ... She’s a thrill seeker like her cousin ... Another Black bound for Gryffindor, I’m sure of that.
“Sirius,” she whispered to herself as she looked down at the photograph again. Although he was motionless, there was a spark in his eyes; a sense of life about him that she could not bear to think was rotting away in Azkaban. She touched his face. “I’m sorry I wasn’t a Gryffindor for you.”
She could feel a lump in her throat, so she placed the photograph and the letters back in the envelope. Then she wrote a reply to Martha, accepting her invitation for dinner.
***
The Wand and Cauldron was a small restaurant near Diagon Alley. Tonks arrived there at eight o’clock, nearly two weeks later, to meet Martha. She entered the place and immediately walked into a robe-stand because she was looking all around her.
“Shit,” she muttered as it toppled over and a robe in a particularly virulent shade of orange fell on top of her.
“Need a hand?” Martha called from the bar area. Tonks threw off the cloak, picked up the robe-stand and then, giving it a wide berth, sat down on a bar stool next to Martha.
“Sorry about that,” she said, sighing. “I’d like to say I’m not always that clumsy, but actually I am.”
“Yet you were a Chaser?” questioned Martha.
“Mmm, for some reason I’m quite graceful in the air,” Tonks replied. “It’s only when my feet are on solid earth that I become a klutz.”
A waiter walked across to show them to their table. They sat down together and began to study the menu. “Do you want some wine?” asked Martha as she looked at the list. “I might have a glass, but I’m in training and really shouldn’t over-indulge, but feel free to order a bottle.”
“Err, I don’t really drink much, either,” Tonks replied, “but one glass would be nice.”
“Merlin, you’re nothing like Sirius then!” Martha exclaimed. The waiter walked over and Martha ordered two glasses of wine. “I thought the Auror department was full of hardened drinkers.”
“Mmm,” replied Tonks, “that’s the problem. Not only am I the only witch, but I’m the only one who doesn’t go for a regular drink with the boys.” She paused as the waiter returned with their drinks. “I don’t mind the odd glass of wine, though.” She smiled to herself as she remembered drinking by the lakeside in Romania with Charlie, and then a glass with dinner in Remus’ room.
“I know what that’s like,” Martha replied, sighing, “being the odd-one out, I mean. When I first joined the Calais Cygnes, I was fresh out of Hogwarts. I was supposed to be a reserve but then their Seeker had to pull out “ for various personal reasons “ and I was drafted in. I was the only non-French player on the team and the crowd were not pleased that I’d taken over from their darling!”
Tonks looked at Martha with interest. “You stayed there for a long time, so how did you get them to accept you?”
Martha laughed. “Well, for one thing, I caught the Snitch so we won the game, but I think what really swayed the crowd was when my shirt got ripped off and I’d chosen that day not to wear a bra.” She smirked. “After that I was surprisingly popular!”
Tonks gasped and then began to giggle. “Well, I’m not sure that would work in the Auror Department, although Mad-Eye’s face would be interesting.”
Martha took another sip of her drink. “The next day, I got home to find a present from Sirius “ it was a red satin bra. Apparently, I’d made page three of the Prophet.”
Tonks began to laugh again but stopped when she noticed that Martha was gazing blankly at her glass. To Tonks’ horror, a single tear trickled down Martha’s cheek.
“Merlin, I’m sorry!” whispered Martha as she wiped away the tear. “I still miss him. I know we’d split up, but we’d kept in touch and occasionally had the odd ... reunion ... should I say.”
“When did you last see him?” asked Tonks gently. She reached over and grasped the older woman’s hand.
“The summer before James and Lily died,” Martha replied. “Sirius came to visit and stayed a while. He’d changed though and was much more serious, more mature if you like. At the time I thought it was because of the Order. The Death Eaters were closing in and they never knew if they’d see the next dawn. Merlin, I cried when the Prewetts died. Then, after Sirius was sent to Azkaban, I realised he was probably more worried about being discovered as a traitor.”
Tonks removed her hand and took a slug of wine.
“That’s not what you want to hear, though, is it, Tonks?” Martha continued. “You want me to tell you that I never believed him capable of such a dreadful act, that I’ll fight with you to prove his innocence.”
Tonks leant back in her chair. “I know everyone thinks I’m stupid. I know the proof against Sirius is incontrovertible, but I can’t reconcile the cousin that twirled me around in the air, and was so excited that Lily was having a baby, with the cold-blooded murderer now incarcerated.”
There was a long pause as both gazed into the distance. “I’m sorry,” murmured Martha at last. “I had trouble believing it too. When Sirius was sent to prison, I was sure there was a mistake. But Peter was dead and there were too many witnesses to Sirius’ attack.” She shook her head. “Come on, let’s order some food.”
Tonks shrugged her shoulders but went back to studying the menu. After a while, the atmosphere lightened as Martha regaled her with tales from the French Quidditch League, and Tonks began to tell her about the Auror Department. A waiter brought their starters to the table and both began to eat.
“I am sorry for what I said about Rob Avery,” said Martha at last. “It wasn’t my place to lecture you about your love life.”
Tonks swallowed her food and shook her head. “That’s okay. You were, as it happened, quite right about him. I wasn’t that interested “ much to his annoyance.”
“What’s that?” Martha asked sharply. “Did something happen?”
Tonks failed to stop the blush spreading across her face. “He... err ... went a bit far, that’s all and I ... err ... had to threaten to hex him.”
Martha giggled. “Really? Oh. I’d have liked to see that ...” She stopped as she saw Tonks’ face. “I’m sorry. That was insensitive. It shook you up, didn’t it?”
Tonks nodded. “A bit. He yelled afterwards and said the rumours about me must be true.” She paused. “Because I don’t appear to have a boyfriend, the other Aurors are convinced I’m more interested in witches.”
“Oh,” said Martha, “and are you?” She smiled at the embarrassed expression on Tonks’ face. “There are quite a few gay Quidditch players, you know. Witches and wizards “ you’d be surprised.”
“I don’t think I’m gay,” Tonks said hurriedly. “I-I just didn’t feel anything for Rob Avery, that’s all. I mean I’ve kissed someone “ a man “ before and it felt good, you know. But with Rob, it just felt... wrong.”
“This man,” Martha said slyly, “was it Remus?”
Tonks giggled and then sighed. “Yeah, it was, actually. Lot of good it did me, though. We met up again in Romania, purely by chance, and he ran a mile.”
“Ah, that sounds like the Remus Lupin I remember from school. He broods a lot and tries to be noble all the time, but I meant what I said at the match. He couldn’t stop talking about you in France.” She stared at Tonks. “How much do you know about him?”
“What do you mean?” Tonks asked, unsure if Martha meant what she thought she did. The waiter returned to remove their plates and bring them their main course. Neither Martha nor Tonks spoke whilst he set the plates and brought fresh cutlery for them.
“Remus has a ‘problem’,” replied Martha once the waiter had left. “I found out in my fifth year, shortly after I started going out with Sirius, and it caused a lot of trouble at the time as it still would today. However, I can’t imagine him kissing you under any circumstances unless you knew the truth ...” She paused as she considered her next words.
Tonks looked around at the other diners. A few looked across, curiously, perhaps recognising Martha who had made the front pages after her successful catch two weeks before. “Don’t say anything. Not here at least,” she begged Martha. “I-I think I know what you’re going to say; Remus told me ... certain things about his scars and “ “ she lowered her voice “-- bites.”
“And you don’t seem at all put off,” said Martha slowly. “My sister couldn’t cope at all.”
“Your sister?”
“Mmm, my sister, Mary. She was Lily Evans’ best friend and she went out with Remus for a while but ...” She stopped and pushed her plate to one side. “It’s not my story to tell. Perhaps you should ask Remus next time you see him.”
Tonks pushed her fork around the plate trying to mop up all the gravy with her last potato. “The next time I see him? I doubt that will be anytime soon. As far as I know he’s still in Romania working with dragons. I doubt he’ll return soon.”
Martha chewed at some chicken thoughtfully. “People have a habit of turning up when you least expect them, Tonks.”
***
“Cancelled!” Tonks exclaimed nearly a week later as she burst into Moody’s office brandishing a sheaf of parchment. “Aw, c’mon, Mad-eye, I’m supposed to be seeing my Nan at Christmas. Why has my leave been cancelled?”
Moody was sitting at his desk, flicking through a pile of reports. “All leave has been cancelled, Nymphadora, not just yours. There’s a crisis at Hogwarts in case you hadn’t noticed and the Minister wants to make sure we’re on red alert to deal with anything untoward.”
“Are we going to Hogwarts, then?” Tonks asked, failing to keep a note of excitement out of her voice.
“No,” Moody replied shortly. “Fudge just wants us on standby.”
“And is the Minister going to be here on Christmas day?” she asked slyly as she sat down in the proffered chair.
“Don’t be impertinent, Nymphadora,” rasped Moody, then he added sardonically, “The Minister is far too important for a small matter of the petrification of Muggleborns.” He sighed and began to shuffle his papers together. “I’m sorry about your leave, but there will be other times. For now I need you to visit the Ministry library and discover anything you can about the Chamber of Secrets.” Moody paused. “This is hush-hush, just between us two and Professor Dumbledore, do you understand?”
“Professor Dumbledore?” she said in an awed tone.
“That’s what I said, Nymphadora. He requested you especially.”
***
The Ministry library was based in a large room in the Magical records department. Tonks had visited it precisely once, when she’d had a tour of the building in her pre-training days. It was surprisingly bright and airy for a library. Tonks appreciated the order in which the books were kept but found it strangely soul-less. At Hogwarts, the dark corners and flickering lamplight had added to the atmosphere and made research inviting, but here the almost blue lights, used to keep the books in pristine condition, and cast cold shadows everywhere.
For the next few weeks when Tonks wasn’t out with Moody, she was ensconced here looking for any clue that could help discover the truth about the horrors going on at Hogwarts. There was a brief mention of a chamber built by Salazar Slytherin when he left Hogwarts, but Moody had asked her to see what she could find out about it being opened once and of that she could find no trace.
“About fifty years ago, Nymphadora,” he’d explained. “It was a few years before my time but I still remember the older students talking about it.”
She sighed in exasperation. The records for Hogwarts at that time appeared to be missing and although she searched ten years either side of the dates Moody had given her, she could not find any answers for him.
“Back again?” the librarian, a kindly witch called Maud Goodbody, asked her.
“Mmm,” Tonks replied. “I’m really not having much luck.” She stopped talking; Mad-Eye had told her she was not allowed to tell anyone what she was doing but maybe there was some way the librarian could help.
“Do records ever get taken out of the library?” she began. “Or do they get mislaid?”
Maud’s face stiffened slightly. “None get taken out of the library, my dear. The Head of Magical Records, Mr MacMillan is most particular about that ... especially after the last time.”
“Last time?” repeated Tonks. “What happened the last time?”
Maud leant into Tonks, her face shining with excitement at the information she was about to impart. She settled herself into a seat opposite and bent her head lower. Tonks could see a small wart quivering on the side of her nose and had to bite her lip to stop herself from laughing. “Oh, my dear, haven’t you heard what happened? Well,” she mused, “I suppose you are a bit young.” She looked around her. “About fifteen years ago one of the clerks took away a series of records from the library. It was frowned upon in those days, but not strictly forbidden. Anyway, this clerk was found a week later,” she paused dramatically, “dead! And the records were gone.”
“Gone?” said Tonks in shock. She was expecting some minor scandal involving a spilt cup of Pumpkin Juice over the pages, or a Kneazle chewing some pages “ but this was horrific. “What records were they?” Tonks asked at last.
Maud closed her eyes. Tonks could see the old witch’s lips moving as she tried to recall the events of fifteen years before. “Hogwarts records,” she said at last. “I can’t remember the years, exactly, but I remember Mr Lupin’s face as clear as the day he took them out. That must have been the last time I saw him.”
“Who?” Tonks’ face whiplashed back to the librarian. “Who was the clerk that removed the records, Miss Goodbody?”
“John Lupin,” repeated Maud. “Poor man, always so polite, he didn’t deserve such a nasty end.”
***
The weeks turned into months and still Tonks was unable to discover anything at the Ministry library about either the Chamber of Secrets or any records that John Lupin may have taken with him. With her second year exams looming, she was relieved one evening to be pulled off the case by Moody, who informed her that the danger had passed as a second-year boy “ one Harry Potter- had apparently solved the mystery and killed a Basilisk in the process. Feeling slightly jealous that she hadn’t managed to do anything that exciting at school, Tonks was relieved nonetheless that she now had time to concentrate on her exams. Moody, she knew, was pleased with her progress, but she wasn’t satisfied. Her clumsiness threatened to get her kicked out and she knew she had to manage it somehow to satisfy Scrimgeour’s’ standards.
“Concentrate, Nymphadora,” Moody barked at her one afternoon. “You need to focus. If you trip in the field, you’re dead.”
“I know that,” she replied through gritted teeth. She picked herself off the ground. They were in a dilapidated Muggle street where she’d been shadowing Muggles, perfectly successfully, until she’d tripped on a discarded beer can down an alleyway. She wiped her forehead. It was a hot late-June day and she was tired. “You’re not exactly wearing the best disguise in the world, Mad-Eye. Well, not if you want to remain inconspicuous.”
Moody grunted something, and then removed the purple bowler hat he was wearing. He looked as if he were about to bark an order at her, but his attention was snapped away from her by the sound of a crack.
Kingsley Shacklebolt appeared from behind a dustcart. He was smiling as he walked towards them. “How’s it going today?” he asked.
As Moody raised his eyebrows, Tonks glowered at him and Kingsley began to laugh. “Alastor, why don’t I take over? The Minister and Rufus are looking for you; they need to discuss a situation concerning Malfoy’s resignation as a Hogwarts Governor.”
Moody nodded and then, checking that there were no Muggles nearby, Disapparated.
Kingsley smiled again at Tonks. “How is it really going, Tonks?”
She sighed. “One minute I think I’ve cracked it and the next I’m falling over my feet again. Mad-Eye keeps barking at me to focus, but my head’s just aching. I feel clumsy and stupid, Kingsley; sometimes I just want to give up.”
Kingsley leant forward and touched her forehead. “I don’t think you’re stupid, Tonks. I think you’re exhausted and ill.” He took her hand and led her towards the pavement. They sat together on the kerb and he brought out two bottles of Pumpkin Juice. “I know you’ve been working hard lately. There’s been your normal Auror training, work for Mad-Eye, and I’ve noticed you’ve been putting a lot of time in at the library.” He paused and swigged his juice. “You need some time off to rest and recuperate.”
Tonks rubbed her eyes. She was unused to this camaraderie from a colleague, and suddenly Kingsley reminded her very much of Charlie. Moody was a wonderful mentor, but she didn’t have a friend. “I am tired,” she admitted finally.
Kingsley put a hand on her shoulder. “Then take a break. Go home and see your parents. Relax for a while and maybe when you come back, you’ll feel refreshed.”
***
At her parents’ house, Tonks found a semblance of calm. Her Nan was there, too, which always meant there was laughter ringing around the house and Tonks found herself enjoying life once more. And once her mum had stopped enquiring after Rob and her love life in general, she found she could relax.
Three days before she was due back, Tonks took herself off camping. There was a stream running through a wood, and she’d spent many a happy moment there in her childhood. It was secluded, so she’d had no need to wear hats or hoods to keep her ‘naughty’ hair under control, and she’d felt happy with just her dad as they watched the badgers.
Sitting by the stream, listening to the water as it flowed over smooth stones, she thought about the time her dad had brought her here after Sirius’ incarceration. She’d been a screaming, sobbing mess, unable to believe what had happened. Andromeda had wanted to call in a Healer when she’d refused to leave her bed for weeks on end, but Ted “ always the practical one “ had declared he knew his daughter. He’d strode into her room, picked up his yelling and kicking princess, and Apparated with her to this very spot.
“You can scream as much as you want here, Dora, love,” he’d said gently but firmly. “There’s not a lot you can do for the man. And I’m not sure he deserves your agony. But you have to find a way to get through it, and this is the only thing I can think of. So shout your loudest, and see if you can wake the badgers.”
It had been a cold, wintery day. She’d cried until her throat was raw, and after a while when she could scream no more, her dad had held her in his arms. In silence, they’d watched as the badgers emerged from their sett to feed. It had given her a sense of peace, a sense that some things remained constant despite the awfulness of the world around her.
And now, nearly twelve years later, she still found solace in this place. She brooded on Sirius’ letter to Martha and his confidence that his young cousin would be in Gryffindor. “I couldn’t have been a Gryffindor, Sirius,” she said out loud. “I tried, you know, but the Hat said that my loyalty, above all else, ‘shone through’. Would that have disappointed you?”
”I doubt it, Tonks,” said a voice above her.
Tonks lifted her head sharply. A shaft of sunlight shining through the trees momentarily blinded her, and she found the emerging figure difficult to discern. She blinked twice, and then shielded her eyes from the sun. She gasped, for standing in front of her, looking shabby, tired, and badly in need of a haircut was Remus.
“Wh-what are you doing here?” she asked in a strangled whisper.
Remus walked purposefully towards and then settled himself on the bank next to her. “I came to find you,” he said at last, “to stop you doing anything stupid.”
“What do you mean?” she asked. “I’m always doing stupid things, so why now?” She giggled -- slightly hysterically -- as the shock of his presence was just starting to sink in. She beamed up at him, but his expression was grim.
“Merlin!” he exclaimed. “You don’t know, do you? Look, Tonks, you need to get home. I called to talk to your parents, but they weren’t there, just your Nan. She told me where you’d be.”
He was fiddling with the end of his wand; she’d never seen him nervous before. Suddenly she was very worried.
“What’s happened?”
Remus placed his wand down on the earth, picked up her hands and held them tight. She was now so close to him that she could see the yellow flecks in his light brown eyes. She had an urge to blow away the overlong lock of greying hair that had fallen across his forehead, and to put her lips to a scar above his cheek. He moved forwards, and she was sure for one infinitesimal moment that he was about to kiss her. Then he shook his head and, clearing his throat, said in an eerily calm voice.
“Two days ago, Tonks, Sirius escaped from Azkaban.”
End Notes:
DUN! DUN! DUN!
I love reviews, and Tonks has told me she loves them too.
Chapter 12 Tea at the Tonks' House by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Sirius has escaped. Remus is back. Tonks is ecstatic. But has her belief in her cousin blinded her to the facts?
Many thanks to Afifa who I have press-ganged into the cause of my good ship beta!
***It took her, Merlin knew how long, to speak. The words Remus uttered landed on her like a blow to her chest as she struggled to breathe. She tried to stand up, but her legs crumpled. Remus pulled her back down to the ground.
“He’s free,” she said at last, her mind whirring.
“He’s not free, Tonks,” corrected Remus. “He’s on the run. He’s escaped and every Hit Wizard and Auror in the land is looking for him.”
The word ‘Auror’ reverberated through her head. She was an Auror; she would be told to find him, and maybe bring him back to Azkaban. She smiled slightly. Well, let her be the one to find him. She could help.
“Tonks!” Remus sounded worried. “Don’t even think about it.”
“Think what?” she asked, beaming up at him.
“It’s as clear as if I’d studied Legilimency, you cannot go after him. That would be crazy.”
She tilted her head to one side. “Me do something crazy? I’m not at school now, Remus.”
Remus snorted. “I haven’t forgotten the dragon cage, Tonks.” He stood up and reached out his hand to her. Tonks accepted it and they walked to where she’d set up her tent, their fingertips still touching.
Tonks waved her wand and haphazardly packed up her belongings. “Will you come back with me and see my parents? They’ll need to hear the news and I’d rather it was from you than some jumped-up Ministry official intent on wrecking the house as they search for Sirius.”
Remus smiled. “I’ve already been invited. Your nan was insistent that I stay for tea. Before I left, she got me to light the oven.”
Tonks laughed. “She’s probably making a cake right now.”
***
“Nan!” called Tonks from the back door. “We’re back.” She turned to Remus. “Why don’t you sit outside and I’ll bring you a drink?”
Remus pulled up a rickety-looking seat and sat outside by a small garden table. As Tonks walked inside, she looked back and saw him tilt his face to the sun. Despite his obvious tension, he seemed to relax a touch in the warm summer’s day. She walked into the kitchen. “Nice smell, Nan. Are you baking?”
“Dora!” exclaimed Shirley. “I knew your young man would bring you back.” She was in the middle of turning out a sponge cake from the tin, her face flushed from the heat of the oven.
Tonks blushed. “He’s not my young man. He’s a friend.”
“Don’t give me that, dearie. I recognised him from that photograph as soon as he walked through the door.”
“Nan, if you start matchmaking, I’ll ... I’ll ...” Tonks spluttered.
“You’ll what, Dora, blush very prettily.” She grinned at her granddaughter. “Don’t worry, ducks, I won’t embarrass you. Now, let me finish my cake and I’ll bring you both a slice in a while.”
Tonks opened the chill-charmed cupboard and removed two bottles of Butterbeer. She set them on a tray and then found two tall glasses. She walked out into the garden, squinting as the sun caught her eyes.
“I could only find Butterbeer; is that all right?” she asked him as she set the tray down on the table.
Remus opened his eyes and smiled directly at her. “Perfect,” he replied.
“Is this a holiday?” asked Tonks as she sat down at the table. She felt flustered at his presence, now that the initial shock of his news was wearing off.
Remus leant forward and lifted the Butterbeer to his lips. He took a gulp and then answered, “I won’t be going back to Romania if that’s what you mean.” He paused. “At least, not in the near future. I have other things to do.”
I’ll be able to see him, she thought. We can talk about Sirius and...
“How’s Auror training?” he asked interrupting her thoughts.
“Oh, fine,” she replied unenthusiastically. “Sorry, I still haven’t quite got my head around your news. How did Sirius escape? You never said. Did he have help?”
Remus opened his mouth to reply but just at that moment, Shirley walked out. “Here you go, my dears, Victoria sandwich straight from the oven.”
“Mrs Tonks, that looks wonderful,” said Remus earnestly. Tonks had the feeling he was extremely grateful for the interruption, probably to avoid her questions.
“It’s not ‘Tonks’ any more, love,” replied Shirley, sighing. “It’s King “ but he was a baddun’, not like my Eddy, so you can call me Shirley.”
Remus blinked at her frankness and laughed slightly nervously. He accepted a piece of cake and began to eat. “This is wonderful, Shirley. You’re a good cook.”
“Unfortunately, Dora hasn’t inherited my skills,” Shirley said, laughing. “I keep telling her the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach “”
“Nan!” whispered Tonks in undertone. “Stop it.”
Shirley grinned innocently and opened her mouth to continue, but a sound from the house made them all turn around.
“I am perfectly capable of making a cup of tea, Ted. Will you stop mollycoddling me?”
“That’ll be mum and dad,” explained Tonks to Remus. “I’ll ... err ... just tell them you’re here.” She ran into the house, knocking over a plant pot on the way.
“Graceful little swan, isn’t she?” Tonks heard Shirley say to Remus. He chuckled.
Inside the house, her parents seemed to be involved in a silent war. Ted had sat himself down in an armchair and was reading the newspaper. Her mother was looking at him, a firm set to her lips. “Hi,” Tonks said nervously. “I’ve ... err ... brought someone here for tea. Is that okay?”
“Nymphadora, darling,” effused Andromeda as she hastily rearranged her features into a welcoming smile. “I didn’t know you were back.” She peered out into the garden. “Oh, it’s not Rob, then.”
Tonks shrugged. “No, Mum, it’s not Rob Avery. Can you just give it a rest as far as he’s concerned?”
Her father snorted. “I don’t think your mum is capable of giving anything a rest,” he muttered. “Dora, we need to have a talk, love.”
“Ted,” Andromeda said, a note of warning in her voice. “This is not the time.” She turned to her daughter. “Come on, darling. Introduce me to your young man.”
“Oh, he’s not my ... umm ... anything, really, Mum. He’s a friend and I think you know him already.”
“Really,” replied Andromeda, smiling indulgently. “Then why are you totally failing to morph away that blush that’s creeping across your face.” She put her arm around Tonks and walked with her into the garden.
Tonks swallowed. “Mum, this is Remus Lupin. He was a friend of ...”
She felt Andromeda stiffen beside her. “We’ve met,” Andromeda said bleakly. “You were at the Wizangamot when Bellatrix was on trial, I believe.”
Remus stood up as she pulled up another chair. “I wasn’t sure you’d remember me, Mrs Tonks,” he began.
Andromeda looked from Remus to Tonks, who was settling herself into a chair next to him. “Call me Andromeda, Remus. After all, we’re practically the same age,” she said waspishly.
Shirley spluttered on her drink, and Tonks blushed once more at her mother’s apparent rudeness. Remus looked uncomfortable and set his drink down. “I should explain why I’m here, Andromeda. I have some news about Sirius Black.”
“We already know,” said Ted wearily as he walked into the back garden. He slapped the newspaper on the table. “If you’re from the Ministry, then you’re too late. It would have been nice to have a warning before Rita Skeeter and her crew pounced on us though.”
“Dad,” said Tonks urgently. “He’s not from the Ministry. This is Remus Lupin. He’s a friend of Sirius’.”
“That’s all we need,” muttered Ted, “another bloody Black apologist!”
“I wasn’t excusing him, Ted. I merely told the woman I didn’t want to talk about Sirius!” said Andromeda through gritted teeth.
“What’s wrong with excusing him?”Tonks said defiantly. “Perhaps theDaily Prophet can prove his innocence. Remus, you could talk to them too.”
Remus started and turned his face to Tonks. “That’s not a good idea.”
“But surely,” Tonks said desperately, “the more people that know, the more we --”
“Dora,” Ted said sharply. “Stop this now. Don’t wreck your future for him!”
Tonks looked mutinously at her dad. Normally he was a very placid man but she knew when not to argue. She sipped at her Butterbeer. There was a long silence, broken only by Shirley asking if anyone else wanted more cake.
“Remus,” said Andromeda at last. “What do you do for a living?”
Tonks groaned inwardly, but Remus smiled and looked Andromeda directly in the eye. “I was working with dragons, but I’ve come back now.”
“And what plans do you have?” Andromeda asked stiffly.
“Well, that’s rather up to Albus Dumbledore,” he replied calmly. “I have a meeting with him tomorrow.”
“Really?” asked Tonks. Her mind sped back to Romania, and Remus telling her that he was gathering information. “What does he want you to do now?”
“Oh, this and that, Tonks,” he said turning to her and grinning. “You know what Albus is like. Speaks in riddles a lot of the time.”
She laughed and grinned back. For just that moment she felt as though they were the only two there, sharing a drink and a joke, but then Andromeda spoke.
“Albus Dumbledore employs you, Remus?” she asked.
“In a way, yes,” he replied neutrally. “Although, the dragon reserve was my own idea.” He turned back to Tonks. “Charlie is well, by the way. I think he was hoping to come back to England to visit, but the family trip to Egypt was a strong lure.”
“Is he still seeing Alexa?” asked Tonks. Remus shook his head; she was about to ask what happened, but Andromeda interrupted again.
“You met up in Romania?” she questioned and then turned to her daughter. “You never mentioned seeing Remus there, Nymphadora.”
“Didn’t I?” muttered Tonks vaguely.
“I had just started at the reserve when your daughter returned from her hiking trip,” added Remus. “Our paths crossed for a few days at the most.”
“Remus saved me from being burnt to a cinder by a dragon, actually,” said Tonks, laughing.
“Oh, just like St George,” exclaimed Shirley and she cast a sly look at her daughter-in-law. “Unlike you to get yourself caught up in a drama, Dora, love. It’s a good job the lad was on hand, eh, Dromeda?”
Andromeda’s shoulders stiffened and Tonks fought back a furious urge to giggle.
Remus finished his drink and made a play of fishing out a pocket watch from his pocket. “Merlin!” he exclaimed. “Is that the time? I really should be going.” He stood up and held out his hand to Shirley. “Thank you very much for the cake. It was delicious.”
Shirley brushed away his hand and stood up to give him a kiss on the cheek. “It was nice to meet you at last, Remus,” she said enigmatically. Remus looked at her, a puzzled expression on his face and Tonks suddenly found her feet very fascinating.
“Do you want to use the Floo?” Andromeda asked. Her tone was friendlier and Tonks thought her mother sounded faintly ashamed of the abrupt manner she’d used.
“No, my flat isn’t connected at the moment. I’ll Apparate, I think,” replied Remus as he withdrew his wand from his robes.
“You can’t here,” said Ted. “I’ve put a charm around the place otherwise we’d be invaded by reporters. Dora, perhaps you could show Remus the way out past the gate.”
“Yeah, sure,” replied Tonks, pleased that she’d have a few minutes alone with him. She leapt to her feet, sending the Butterbeer bottles flying. “Sorry, sorry.” Tonks quickly picked up the bottles and siphoned up the remains of the drink with her wand. Andromeda raised her eyes to the sky, but Shirley laughed.
“Chip off the old block, Dora. Just like my Tonks. Cack-‘anded as you like, but wonderful with it.”
“Come on,” said Tonks abruptly to Remus. She left the table and began to walk down the path. “It’s this way.”
Remus hurriedly said his goodbyes and jogged to catch up with her. “Are you all right?” he asked her.
She shrugged. “Mmm, I will be. It’s only a beer bottle after all.”
“I didn’t mean that; I meant this news about Sirius. You’ve been suspiciously quiet,” he replied, a note of warning in his voice. Tonks changed the subject.
“I met Martha, did you know?” Tonks asked as they wandered down a long overgrown path. “She was flying for the Harpies and I ambushed her. Then she invited me for dinner. She told me you’d warned her that I’d turn up. What did you think I was going to do? Attack her or something?” Tonks didn’t know why she suddenly felt angry, but a feeling of futility was flooding through her. Sirius was free, but how the hell could she help him?
“No,” Remus replied slowly, and plucked at her arm. “I didn’t think you’d attack her, but Martha needed to know you might head her way.” He paused and they both stopped walking. He looked her in the eye. “You’re honest and incredibly loyal, Tonks, but you do charge at things. Martha was a mess when Sirius was sent to Azkaban, and I wasn’t sure how you turning up would affect her.”
“Oh,” said Tonks quietly. “Sorry, I hadn’t realised I was such a nuisance.”
Remus closed his eyes. “You’re not a nuisance “ far from it.” He paused. “I never thanked you for the salve you made me and the pictures inside the bunker.”
“Did it help?” asked Tonks, meaning the salve. She began walking again and Remus followed her as she hopped over a brook at the bottom of the garden. She looked around, but there were no reporters in sight.
“It was nice when to wake up after sunrise and see your face,” Remus said idly. He turned a faint shade of pink as he realised what he’d implied.
Tonks felt her stomach swoop. She turned around and impulsively leant forwards, planting a kiss on his cheek. “You’re welcome,” she said, smiling broadly.
Remus hesitated, and then he lifted a hand to her face. His thumb stroked her cheekbone, and she turned her head sideways to kiss his palm. Remus slowly leant forwards and gently kissed her on the cheek. Her lips moved towards his; they touched and lingered for a moment. He pulled back. “We can’t do this,” he muttered, not looking her in the eye.
“Why not?” she whispered as she pulled him back towards her.
“Because, amongst other things, I’m thirty-three, and you’re still a teenager.”
“I’m twenty!” she declared.
“That old, eh?” Remus murmured ruefully. He slowly disentangled himself from her arms. “I’m too damaged, Tonks. You know that.”
Tonks took a step back and assessed him. “Aren’t I the best judge of that?”
Remus shook his head. “You truly do not understand how dangerous I am.”
“For one night a month, Remus, you become a werewolf. For every day of my life, I’m a bumbling, falling over mess who gets into more scrapes and trouble than I doubt even you and your friends got into at Hogwarts,” she replied forcefully.
“You are as infuriating as him sometimes, do you know that? Convinced you’re right all the time. It must be your Black blood.”
His words echoed Rob’s, but the tone was vastly different. Slightly teasing, affectionate, but altogether much too brotherly in Tonks’ mind. She changed tack, determined to prolong her time with him.
“You’ll contact me if Sirius finds you, yes?”
Remus did a double take. “Why on earth would I do that? And why do you think he’ll contact me?”
“Because he’ll need our help,” she answered plainly. “We are the only ones who believe in him, after all.”
“H-hold on, Tonks. What are you saying?” Remus took her arm again and stared intensely into her eyes.
“You said to me “ three years ago “ that you didn’t think him guilty. You’d drunk Veritaserum and you said ‘Padfoot would not have done that.’” She rounded on him with disbelief written all over her face. “Are you going back on that now?”
“Listen to me!” Remus exclaimed and Tonks could see he was trying to control a sudden surge of feelings. “I know I said that, and I truly want to believe that you’re right. But Sirius Black murdered thirteen Muggles “ and Peter. And do you know what he was screaming in the night, just before he escaped from Azkaban?”
Tonks went white and bit her lip. She shook her head.
“’He’s at Hogwarts!’ That’s what he was saying in his sleep. He’s not going to come and find me. He’s not interested in any half-baked notion of innocence. He’s on his way to Hogwarts to kill Harry.”
“NO!” she shouted. “He won’t kill his best friend’s son.”
Remus clenched his jaw. He swung away from her but then turned back. “Tonks,” he began softly, “you knew him all of one day and base your judgement on an afternoon spent with him on his motorbike. I knew him all the way through school, but I recognise the facts when I see them. What do you think I’m doing back here? It’s not to help Black; it’s to protect Harry. Dumbledore has asked me to be the new Defence against the Dark Arts teacher.”
“And you’re going to accept,” Tonks said bleakly. “And when Sirius turns up “ or rather, if he turns up “ you’ll throw him back to the Dementors.”
Remus took a deep breath and reached for her hand. For a moment, she clutched at it, but then shook him off. “I wasn’t going to, Tonks. I’m a real danger to the students and the staff, although Dumbledore has promised me that Snape will make Wolfsbane every month, but I have a duty too.” He cupped her chin in his fingers and forced her eyes to meet his. “I have to protect James and Lily’s son.”
Pushing him away angrily, Tonks yelled, “I’ll do it alone then. Why the hell did I think you’d be any different?”
Remus held out a hand in a conciliatory gesture, but she refused to bend. There was a long silence while he studied her, and then she turned away, so, sighing, he took a few steps back. Raising his arm in a last salute, he turned sharply and Disapparated. Tonks heard the crack as he left, and a tear trickled down her cheek, caressing the very place where his lips had been. She felt as if she too were Apparating, so great was the sudden constriction around her heart.
***
With only a brief word of explanation to her parents and her nan about being needed in the Auror department, Tonks had run back to the house and hastily packed her things. She had grabbed a handful of Floo powder from the china pot her mother kept on the mantelpiece and headed straight for the Ministry. She tripped as she landed and her belongings spilled out into the atrium.
There was a round of applause. “Nice entrance, Nymphadora!” came the mocking tones of Jacob Proudfoot. “Your trip away has helped your flat feet, then.”
Tonks gritted her teeth. Don’t react, she thought. Ignore him. He’s an arsehole.
“What a good job we have witches like you in the Auror department. Black will soon be banged up again with you on the trail.”
She snapped. “Shut UP!” she yelled. “I’ve had it with your snide comments and sexist attitude. What makes you think you’re so bloody wonderful? You’re a tosser and a prat, who can’t even hover a foot off the ground without five cushioning charms.” She strode over to him and pointed her wand at his face. “If you EVER speak to me like that again, I’ll hex you into next week.”
“Like you can!” Proudfoot spluttered. “You haven’t shown much talent at all, Nymphadora. Unless you count the freakish way you can change your hair.”
Hair flashing a vibrant shade of red, Tonks raised her wands arm to inflict a Stinging Jinx when suddenly she heard a cry of Expelliarmus! Her wand flew out of her hand and Mad-Eye stood behind her.
“Don’t be stupid, girl!” he muttered as he walked towards them. “Getting you kicked off the training programme is exactly what he wants.” Mad-Eye bent down to retrieve her wand. “Proudfoot, go back to the office. You still have paperwork to catch up on. Nymphadora, pack those bags away somewhere and then meet me back here in ten minutes.”
Tonks gulped; she felt utterly ashamed over her loss of control and very embarrassed that Moody had seen it happen. “Thank you for stopping me,” she murmured as she gathered up her things.
Precisely eight minutes later, she returned to the atrium, having stashed her bags under her desk. Mad-Eye was staring at something on the wall opposite and she followed his gaze.
It was a poster of Sirius. They had used the same picture of him laughing manically as he was dragged away to Azkaban. Tonks found herself staring into his dead eyes. She searched his face hoping to find a resemblance to the man she remembered pushing her on a swing, but there was nothing.
“Your cousin,” said Moody at last. She swung around and saw Moody staring at her. “Did you ever meet him?”
The official line, spun by her mother was that she’d never met Sirius. That he’d not been in contact for years. It was a lie that Andromeda told her to keep when she started at Hogwarts and one that Tonks, whilst not promoting, had not denied when anyone touched on her relatives.
“Yes,” she said at last, her voice barely a whisper. “I met him once nearly fourteen years ago.” She sniffed. “I spent a day at his flat when I was six.”
“His flat?” asked Moody and there was an urgency to his voice. “The flat in London, you mean?”
Tonks nodded, wondering why this seemed so important to Moody.
“Come with me,” he ordered.
He marched her towards an empty office and pulled her inside. “We can’t get inside his flat, Nymphadora. Black has cast a protective spell around it “ not the Fidelius Charm “ but some other repellent. Only someone who has previously been there, and that he’s not barred will be able to get in.” He paused and Tonks noticed his magical eye was still, concentrating only on her face. “Just before the Potters were murdered, Dumbledore suspected there was a spy in the camp. People were encouraged to protect their homes from any possible suspect. To keep up the pretence, Black cast enchantments around his flat, too. When he was incarcerated, we couldn’t get in. Lupin tried, I tried and Dumbledore would have tried “ except that he’d never been there. Black was a cunning man and invited very few people into his home. I think, though, that he could have forgotten about a six-year-old girl visiting him once. He would not have seen you as a threat.”
Tonks listened and a plan started forming in her mind. She could get in, and if Sirius were there, she could help. She tried to keep her voice steady. “So you want me to go there alone, yes?”
“Not at all!” replied Moody. “I’ll Side-Along-Apparate with you. If he’s forgotten about you, he won’t think about someone coming with you, either.”
Tonks’ mind was whirring. If Sirius was there and Moody saw him, then he’d be straight back to Azkaban. She’d have to hex Moody, or something. There was no way she’d be allowed to go alone. “Okay,” she said a shade too brightly. She held out her arm to Moody who limped across to her. “What are we waiting for?”
Moody was right, for Sirius had not set his charm against his little cousin. Tonks Apparated them both in the lounge and as she landed “ perfectly for once “ she pretended to stumble and cried out, hoping that would be enough to warn him. Moody glared at her, so she smiled apologetically.
Tonks gazed around the room, gasping as she saw the same photograph on the wall, the black squashy beanbag where she’d sat with Sirius and the same sofa, looking smaller than she remembered. There was a thick layer of dust on everything and she coughed as she moved towards the fireplace. Picking up a photo frame, she carefully wiped it clean. Tears stung her eyes as she saw a picture of James and Lily with a newborn baby. Oh, Merlin, she thought. Why would the man who kept a photograph of this baby be on the way to murder him?
Propped against the wall, not in a frame, was another picture. Again, she wiped the dust from it and then the tears that she’d successfully kept back forced their way out of her eyes. She looked at her young self, scowling out of the picture. She remembered that day very clearly. They’d been going out for her birthday and Andromeda had forced her to wear a particularly horrible dress. Tonks grinned as she remembered the strawberry milkshake she’d accidently spilled down the front that had stained the dress so badly that Andromeda had thrown it away. She turned the photograph over to see Sirius’ writing.
Happy Birthday to Tonks! Oh dear, what on earth were you thinking, Meda, making that fireball wear a dress!
Tonks laughed out loud and Moody, who’d been circling the room, walked over to her side. “We’re here to catch a criminal, Nymphadora,” he growled. “Not play happy families.”
“What if he’s not a criminal, though?” Tonks blurted out the words without thinking. She bit her lip and waited for the inevitable argument from her mentor.
But Moody merely stared at her, and then he sighed. “I was one of the first on the scene, when they found Black. Did you know that?” Tonks shook her head. “You know me; I suspect everyone and trust no-one. Well, that’s the story of Old Mad-Eye, and it’s probably all true. But, I’d worked with Black and he was the very last person I’d thought of as a traitor. Crouch was all for killing him where he stood, but I refused to comply and instead escorted him to Azkaban. I asked him over and over why, why, why. But he didn’t answer. I don’t think he was capable of answering. At the time, I thought the disappearance of Voldemort had unhinged him, but he never explained his actions. The one thing I knew about that cousin of yours was that he was a talker. He could worm his way out of trouble in a heartbeat, but in all this time he’s never said a word.”
Tonks stared at him, feelings of hope and disbelief surging inside her. “Do you think he did it?” she asked, barely able to breathe as she waited for his answer.
“The evidence says he did it, Nymphadora,” Moody replied sternly. “But ... evidence, as we know, isn’t everything. However, there is no other plausible explanation “ at this time “ so if I find him, I will bring him in.” He paused and turned his attention back to the room. “Mind you, I don’t have long to recapture him.” Tonks looked at him blankly. “I retire in two weeks, so I hope you’ve learnt enough from me to progress to your final year.”
Tonks flushed. Although she had been practising whilst she was at her parents’ house, her meeting with Remus had driven all thoughts of her end of year exams away. “I’ll try my best,” she muttered.
Tonks walked out of the lounge and began to search the bedroom. She did not think Sirius was there now, he would surely have heard them talking and could have made his escape. She sat on the bed, where she’d slept all those years ago, and coughed as a cloud of dust flew into the air. Her foot connected with a box poking out from beneath the bed, and she bent down to pick it up. Her finger must have touched the latch, for the top sprang open and a pile of papers and photographs spilled onto the floor. Hurriedly, Tonks picked them up, her attention drawn to one letter.
Dear Padfoot,
Thank you, thank you, for Harry’s birthday present!
Tonks glanced at the name at the end of the letter and then looked at the photograph that tucked into it. Zooming around on a toy broomstick was a small child with jet-black hair. Harry, she thought. A pair of legs in the background chased after the toddler and she knew it was James. And there was Lily laughing with pure joy at the havoc Sirius’ gift was doing to the room. Tonks knew she should not remove anything from Sirius’ flat. She knew that Moody and the other Aurors needed every scrap of evidence they could lay their hands on to return Sirius to Azkaban. And she knew that if she were caught removing evidence, she would be kicked out. But she didn’t care. She folded the letter in half, slipped the photograph back in the middle and then carefully slid it underneath the waistband of her trousers. She smiled slightly as she remembered hiding potion ingredients in her tights. Perhaps I should start wearing skirts and tights again, she thought. She could hear Moody clunking down the hallway.
“There’s nothing here, Moody,” she called as she stood up and walked towards the door, “except some old letters from Hogwarts.”
Moody stood in the doorway and she handed him the box. “I’m hungry, you know,” she began. “Is there any chance of a break, and then we can return later?”
Moody scowled slightly, his magical eye fixing her with a steely glare, but she held his gaze. She washungry, but really, she wanted to get back to her flat to hide the photograph. “Go to Diagon Alley,” he said at last, “and pick up some sandwiches. I’ll stay here and wait. Don’t be too long.”
Tonks grinned and then turned sharply. Apparating straight back to her flat, she pulled out the photograph and letter and ran to put them in her bedroom chest of drawers. Then she Apparated again to Diagon Alley, picked up some sandwiches, pasties, fruit and drinks; and returned to Sirius’ flat.
“Here you go, Mad-Eye,” she said as she landed and threw him some food. He swivelled around and caught the packet. They sat on the floor and began to eat in companionable silence. “I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” Tonks said after she’d finished one sandwich. “You’ve taught me so much and I’ll miss you.”
Moody grunted something, and then he gave her a rare smile. “You’ve been a troublesome student, Nymphadora, but a worthwhile one. I’ll miss sparring with you.”
She laughed. But her amusement was short-lived because suddenly they heard a sound from below the flat. Shit, she thought. The basement, I forgot all about that.”
Tonks stood up and so did Moody. “There’s a basement,” she said apologetically. “Sorry, I forgot. It was where he kept his motorbike.”
Tonks led Moody across the hallway and opened a small door. She remembered Sirius taking a motorbike helmet from here and plonking it on her head. Drawing back a cloak, she revealed a set of steps, which led to the basement. They both walked down, Moody in front.
“Lumos!” he muttered as he entered the dank room. There was no motorbike now. Tonks knew that Sirius had given it to Hagrid on that fateful night. It was supposed to be more proof that he knew his time was up, but now Tonks wondered whether it was a deliberate act to end his association with his carefree school days. With James and Lily dead, could he have ever ridden something so connected with his friends again?
“There’s no one here,” murmured Tonks.
“Homen “ Merlin! what’s that?” exclaimed Moody. As he broke off from his spell, a huge shape loomed in front of him.
Tonks gasped and then laughed. “It’s a dog, Mad-Eye. He’s quite big, but I don’t think he’ll harm us.” She walked down the steps and held out her hand. The dog eyed her warily. “Come on, boy. You shouldn’t be down here; it’s not safe. You never know when a mad Auror might strike,” she said, laughing. She reached into her dress robe pocket and brought out her pasty. She broke some off and held it out to the dog that slunk forward and snatched it from her hand. “Wow, you are hungry.”
Moody returned to the flat as Tonks sat on the bottom steps. She broke off some more pasty, was about to put it in her mouth when she noticed the dog looking at her. “Oh, go on then,” she said and handed him the rest. She reached out a hand and stroked the dog’s ears. For a moment, it appeared to flinch; then relaxed. “You’re not used to this are you? I bet you’ve been ill treated “ you’re so thin.”
The dog snuffled into her hand, prodding her with its wet nose as if searching for more food. But Tonks didn’t have anymore and when she explained this, it seemed to understand. Giving her a quick lick on the hand, as if to say thank you, it turned away and squeezed through a hole in the basement door that led to the outside road. Tonks watched it leave. It had a large frame yet moved so silently. She watched as it placed its huge paws on the surface of the pavement. Like pads, she thought. Soft pads that muffle the sound as it walks. And he places them so carefully. I wonder...
She glanced at her own feet and began to imitate the dog’s actions. By placing carefully, splaying out her toes, she seemed to move silently across the ground. The dog turned its head and barked at her, then bounded off. Tonks laughed and bowed her head to it. “Goodbye, then, oh, hound with the padded feet and thank you!” She turned back to the basement and began to walk back up the steps, silently now. Padded feet, she thought. I need padded feet. Padf “ Tonks yelped and ran back down the steps and across the basement floor until she reached the road.
“Padfoot?” she called, but there was no one there.
End Notes:
I hope you enjoyed that. I've always wondered how that photograph ended up at Grimmauld Place ...
Chapter 13 - Old Marauders Never Die by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you Alyssa for beta'ing this for me.
***Remus sat in the staff room by the fire. It was quiet and he was relishing the peace. As much as he loved being back at Hogwarts and enjoyed the stimulating conversations with his colleagues, he had spent the majority of his adult life alone and sometimes found the bustle overwhelming. By his side were a pile of parchment essays “ his first homework set for the Gryffindor third years “ Harry’s class.
He smiled as he thought about Harry. So like James, willing to tackle anything, yet he didn’t have the same cockiness. “I don’t think you’d be disappointed, Prongs,” he muttered to the air. “Your son is a boy to be proud of.”
“If strutting around the corridors of Hogwarts as if he owns the place is something to be proud of,” came a discordant voice from the door, “then Potter would obviously be delighted with his son.”
Remus closed his eyes and let Snape’s voice drift over him. He didn’t look up but merely added in a mild voice, “I was thinking that James would be proud of how like Lily Harry is. He has the same thirst to prove himself that she had. I always thought that came from her being a Muggle-born.”
There was a silence and then Remus heard the staff room door shut. He looked up and found he was alone again. Sighing, he returned to his marking. Hermione’s work was exceptional. He’d asked for a brief summary of the Boggart chapter “ yet she’d expanded her paragraphs into an essay which delved into their history. You’d have had a hard time keeping up with her, Lily, and she would have been too serious for us.
And that was another difference between Harry and his father. The Marauders would no sooner have let a girl into their gang, than Snivellus Snape.
“What are you smiling at, Remus?”
He looked up to see Charity Burbage, arms full of books and her rather wispy hair escaping from a plait.
“Old friends,” he replied softly. He stood up. “Here, let me help you with those books.”
Gratefully, Charity handed over some of the books and then followed him to the hearthside.
“Would you like tea?” he said as he levitated a small kettle from the flames. She nodded and waited whilst he poured it.
“I think there’re some biscuits in that tin over there,” she said, pointing to the small rosewood table in the far corner, before adding mischievously, “Although Minerva has probably eaten all the shortbread by now.”
“Prof... I mean, Minerva always liked Ginger Newts in my day,” Remus replied.
Charity giggled. “You sound like me two years ago,” she said. Remus shot her a puzzled look. “I couldn’t call my former teachers by their first names “ it was unthinkable. And then, Filius invited me for a cup of tea in his study and told me how hard his first year had been when he’d had to call his old Potions teacher ‘Horace.’ After that, I relaxed “ although Minerva McGonagall still scares the living daylights out of me at times.”
“I think in my case it’s because I was on her wrong side in too many detentions,” Remus said sighing, “but she’s been very welcoming “ in fact everyone has “ just about.”
Charity giggled again and leant in conspiratorially. “Except for dear Severus, eh? Well, you can’t really blame him for that, can you?”
Remus blushed. “You ... um ... know our history, I take it.”
“I was at school when you were, Remus. Oh, you won’t remember me. I was a first year in Hufflepuff when you were in your last year. The four of you were notorious. Lupin, Pettigrew, Potter and “” She stopped abruptly.
“Black,” finished Remus after a while. “Yes, I was friends with him at Hogwarts.” He turned back to his marking. “And you’re right; given our history I don’t think Snape and I will ever be friends.”
“Perhaps you could start by calling him Severus,” Charity replied mildly. “You might find he prefers it to Snape or ... what was it you called him at school?”
“Snivelly,” Remus muttered shamefacedly. “And, no, I’m not particularly proud of it.”
***
At the Halloween feast, Remus found himself sat between Charity and Septima Vector, the Arithmancy Professor. She was a small, ash blonde haired witch with delicate features, but she had a rather disconcerting habit of leaning in very closely when he was speaking and also laughing a little too brightly at his jokes. Charity looked rather discomforted by her presence and was silent throughout the meal.
“What did you do today, Remus?” Septima asked. “With most of the students in Hogsmeade, I expected to see you in the staff room, that’s where we congregate to relax.”
“Oh,” he replied as he helped himself to more pumpkin pie. “I was in my study most of the afternoon.”
“Alone?” Septima asked, raising one eyebrow.
Remus noticed that Charity had stopped talking to Filius on her other side and was straining to listen in. “No, I was talking to one of the students,” he said, “and taking delivery of a Grindylow for my class.”
Septima frowned slightly and leant towards him. “It’s not really a good idea to get too close to the students. I find a professional distance is always the best approach “ otherwise you’ll find they never leave you alone.”
“It was Harry Potter,” replied Remus, “and I don’t mind at all if he wants to talk.”
“What do you think of our Mr Potter?” asked Filius. “I must admit I was dreading his arrival “ quite convinced I’d have another James on my hands “ combined with the trouble the Weasley twins give me, I think I’d have taken very early retirement.”
“Were we that bad?” Remus grinned at his old Charms teacher.
“Yes, you were, Remus, you know it. But rewarding in the end “ always rewarding. Very sad...” Filius stopped talking and Remus knew why.
A sudden memory floated into his head of the four of them in a Charms lesson. Sirius setting light to something because he couldn’t be bothered to listen, James putting it out with Aguamenti and soaking Lily, who’d been sitting in front of them, in the process. Peter had been desperately trying not to laugh; Remus, too, had been beside himself with laughter and also panic, because surely this time they’d gone too far. They’d been second years and Lily had coolly turned round, pointed her wand at James and levitated an ink pot at him.
Remus looked at Filius again, aware he was talking. “Sorry, Filius, what did you say?”
“I was asking whether you thought he was more like Lily or James -- in character, I mean.”
Remus looked across at Harry who was eating more pudding and joking with his friends. He looks so happy, so safe here. I won’t let Black get to him, Prongs. I’d rather die than let that happen, Lily.
“A blend of both, I think,” he murmured. He took a slug of mead; it was rich and sent his senses reeling.
“Are you all right?” asked Charity.
He heard the concern in her voice and smiled grimly because he knew she would find the next thing he said repellent.
“I don’t think mead and Wolfsbane are a good combination,” he replied wryly.
“Oh,” said Charity, looking startled. “I ... err ... hadn’t realised.”
Here it comes, he thought. She’ll turn away and start to talk to Filius again. He decided to leave and have an early night “ Merlin knew he needed it.
“Does it always affect you like this?” she asked and Remus was struck by the compassion “ or was it pity? “ in her eyes.
“I’m not sure. This is only the second month I’ve taken Wolfsbane. I should ask Sna ... Severus really.” He looked around at the Great Hall. Students were finishing their meals and he could see Harry laughing at something the Weasley twins were saying. “I think I should probably go to bed, Charity.”
“Remus, the night is young.” Septima’s voice cut across them both. She lowered her voice, “I wondered whether you’d like a shot or two of Firewhisky. I have a bottle in my rooms somewhere. After all, you’re not on duty tonight, unlike dear Charity.”
“That’s very kind of you, Septima,” replied Charity. Remus wondered whether he was imagining an edge to her voice. “But Remus isn’t feeling very well.” She stood up with him. “Would you like me to walk you back?”
“No,” he said hurriedly. Her face fell and he realised he must have sounded irritable. “Thank you for the concern, Charity, but I’m fine.” He turned to Septima. “I don’t think Firewhisky is a good idea at the moment, but thank you.”
“Another time?” Septima suggested.
Remus could feel his head spinning and just nodded at her. Making his way to the door, he saw Snape eyeing him suspiciously. He wondered whether to ask him about the wisdom of mixing alcohol and Wolfsbane, but Snape did not look at his most approachable, so Remus turned the other way and went to his set of rooms.
It had been three years ago, just before the Quidditch match where Tonks had broken James’ record and then been felled by a Bludger, that Professor Dumbledore had asked Remus if he’d like to return to Hogwarts. Remus had demurred, but Albus had told him his experience would be valuable “ especially to someone like Harry. When Remus had protested again that he had no experience of teaching, Albus had advised him to learn ‘practically’, to spend time abroad and at the same time keep an eye out for any rumours regarding a resurgence of dark magic enclaves.
He looked about his room. Sparsely furnished, because he had so few possessions, Remus nonetheless felt settled here and knew it was because he was back where he’d felt happiest. Walking over to his bookshelf, he pulled down a photo album. There were gaps on some of the pages; the photographs he’d torn out of Black after his betrayal would not be filled by others, and then there were spaces where precious photographs of James and Lily had been. He remembered the owl Hagrid had sent requesting pictures for Harry, and he’d given up several, including their wedding day.
“Should I have handed that over?” he’d asked Albus later. “It had Black in it. Perhaps I should have tried to erase him.” He paused as he recalled the day. “They were both so happy. You could see Lily’s delight that day as if it were tangible ... I couldn’t bear to alter the photograph in case her essence was destroyed. Does that make sense, Albus?”
And Dumbledore had replied, “You were right not to erase him, Remus. Harry will discover his duplicity some day, and it is best he realises that not every person who smiles fondly is a friend.”
There were other photos in the album, not from school, but later, and his eye was caught by one of a couple simply holding hands. “Your son is a wonderful boy, Frank,” he said, and he laughed as he remembered Neville’s Boggart. “He just needs a cauldron load of confidence “ like Wormy did -- and then he’ll do well.”
He could feel the Wolfsbane beginning to take effect; in the nights before the full moon, it had a powerful soporific effect when the waxing moon was in the sky. It was nine o’clock but he was exhausted. Wearily, he staggered to his bed and slept.
An hour later, he was awakened by the sound of hammering on his door.
“LUPIN!” bellowed the voice of Severus Snape. “Get out here, NOW.”
Barely able to open his eyes, Remus unlocked his door.
Snape’s face contorted with rage. “Where is he?”
“Who?” asked Remus in surprise as he reached around the door to a side table where he’d placed his wand.
“As if you need telling,” spat Snape. He withdrew his wand and held it to Remus’ face. “I told Dumbledore you weren’t to be trusted, but he would not be told. Where is he?”
Although confused, Remus was starting to get angry now. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Who am I supposed to be hiding in here?” He looked into at Snape and saw a blaze of anger flicker in his coal black eyes. And then he understood. “What’s happened?” he asked, not wanting the answer. “Is it Black?”
Snape looked at him closely, and then he lowered his wand. “He found a way into the castle and slashed the Gryffindor portrait.” He turned away adding curtly, “Dumbledore wants to see you in his study.”
Still aching with tiredness, Remus dragged himself to Albus’ study.
“Remus, sit down, would you,” Dumbledore began. “I believe Severus has appraised you of the situation.”
Remus nodded and sat down on one of the chairs by the desk. “It’s true then, Albus. Black’s been here.”
“Yes,” replied Dumbledore grimly, “Peeves has given a credible eyewitness account and you know as well as I do, that Peeves would recognise Black easily. He was a memorable student “ you all were.”
Remembering the welcome Peeves had given him when he’d returned as a professor, Remus smiled wryly because the poltergeist had been a party to some of their most memorable escapades. But now was not the time to become nostalgic. He looked across at the Headmaster. “Albus, how can I help?”
Dumbledore was silent as he collected his thoughts. “Remus, I do not know how Black got into the castle. There are Dementors stationed around the grounds. There are Aurors in Hogsmeade. It is inconceivable that the most recognised man in the wizarding world could have got passed them.”
“Headmaster... Albus,” interrupted Remus. “I have not been helping Black. I swear I have no idea where he is.”
Dumbledore lifted a hand to silence him. “Forgive me, I did not mean to imply that you were in league with him. I merely need to know if there is anything I should know about Black that you have not told me before.”
Remus looked away. He’s an Animagus, he knew he should say. He can turn into a big black dog, Albus, but the reason I haven’t told you is ... Merlin, there is no reason except that I’m a coward who doesn’t want to admit that my lycanthropy led my three friends into becoming illegal Animagi.
“Did he study any branches of Dark Magic that you haven’t mentioned before, Remus?” the Headmaster persisted.
Inwardly sighing with relief because he did not have to lie, Remus looked into Albus’ eyes. “Not that I am aware of. He was always passionately against the Dark Arts -- we all were.”
“And you cannot think of anyone who would have helped him escape?”
The sudden image of Tonks in pink-haired fury as she declared her utter loyalty to her cousin leapt into his mind. “No!” he said vehemently. “She didn’t know he’d esca “” He stopped abruptly, aware he’d said too much.
Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. “Remus, this is the second time tonight that you have misunderstood me. I do not believe Nymphadora is involved in this. I merely wondered if there were any other friends of his who would be sympathetic to his cause.”
Remus did not ask how Dumbledore knew he’d been thinking of Tonks. He was aware that the older man was a Legilimens; although Remus knew the rudiments of Occlumency, it was clearly not adequate to block out her image.
“There is no one, Albus,” he said wearily. “At school and in the Order, Black kept close to us. The only other person he ever had contact with was his brother. But Regulus is dead, isn’t he?”
“The Order certainly thought so, although the information was incomplete and much of it came through Sirius’ own investigations.” Remus was aware he was under scrutiny and tried not to yawn. “You are exhausted, Remus, and I think you should be in bed.”
“No, no, I will help you search the castle,” Remus replied.
“You will better serve me by getting a good night’s sleep. I think you must have forgotten Severus’ warning regarding Wolfsbane and alcohol,” he said mildly.
It was on the tip of Remus’ tongue to deny he’d had any warning from Snape, but instead he merely nodded. “Thank you, Albus.”
As he sank back into his bed twenty minutes later, one last thought penetrated his mind before he fell asleep. The Marauder’s Map. I need to get it back.
***
The next morning, Remus awoke late. He had not had a good night’s sleep. Despite the Wolfsbane he’d been haunted by images of a black dog patrolling the Hogwarts grounds. “But,” he muttered, trying to convince himself, “it was Dark magic he used to escape Azkaban. Padfoot no longer exists; he is as dead as Wormtail and Prongs.”
As he walked down the stairs towards the Great Hall for breakfast, his attention was caught by Argus Filch walking across the hall, no doubt to enjoy some food. Marauders Map, he thought, but the sight of Mrs Norris, who had stretched herself out in front of the office door, made him pause.
“Not having breakfast this morning, Remus?” Charity said as she wandered downstairs. She yawned. “Can’t say I blame you. I swear after patrolling all night, I’m far too tired to eat.” She stopped beside him. “Good day to start my diet, I guess...”
“Hmm.” He wasn’t listening properly, wondering if he could entice Mrs Norris away.
“That’s not very chivalrous for a Gryffindor,” she grumbled.
Remus turned his head towards her. “Sorry, Charity, I was miles away. You were saying?”
“It’s not important,” she said sighing. “You obviously have other things on your mind. I can’t blame you. Sirius Black’s appearance last night was a shock for everyone.” She yawned again. “You should have heard some of the theories being bandied around last night.”
“Students being rather far-fetched, were they?” Remus asked. He began to descend the stairs, still watching Filch’s cat.
“No,” Charity replied, laughing. “It was Bathsheba and Sybil. Their latest theory involved him capturing Fawkes and flying into the castle.” She stopped. “Remus, why are you so interested in that revolting cat?”
They were at the bottom stair now and Remus knew that Filch would be back in his office very soon after breakfast. If he were to get hold of the map, he needed to get in there quickly. He thought quickly and then decided to act. “Charity,” he began, “I need to get into Argus’ office to ‘recover’ something. I don’t suppose you’d distract Mrs Norris for me, would you?”
“I take it you can’t just ask Argus for this ‘something’ then?”
Remus laughed. “Merlin no. He might not even have it any more, but he confiscated it years ago and ... well ... I’d rather like it back.”
Charity looked at him and then at Mrs Norris. She gave a sigh. “What do I have to do?”
He grinned at her and pulled out something from his pocket. “Mrs Norris has a fondness for Cockroach Clusters. Could you lure her away, whilst I get inside?”
Accepting the sweets, Charity smiled weakly. “You’re very well prepared, but I suppose that shouldn’t surprise me. How are you going to get in the office? Argus locks it and always has a key on him. Alohamora doesn’t work; I believe Albus charmed the door to only open with a Muggle key “”
“Mmm, I know,” Remus replied as he walked towards Filch’s office. He put his hand in his other pocket. “Filch is very proud of the fact that he’s the only one with a key ... however “” he paused and then showed her something shiny in his hand “”he never knew about James Potter’s amazing lock-picking skills.”
Five minutes later, thanks to the skeleton key and some Cockroach Clusters, Remus found himself in Argus Filch’s office. Hastily, he searched through a large filing cabinet behind the desk. It had been Peter who had dropped the map during their last term. Filch, Remus remembered, had been jubilant at finding something that belonged to his most troublesome students and had whisked it away. Merlin, where is it? he thought, as he rummaged through a draw marked Confiscated and Highly Dangerous.
Why the hell didn’t we get it back at the time? But he knew why. Filch had doubled his vigilance, hoping to catch them out, and James had been so taken up with Lily that he hadn’t seen the need to get it back.
“What do we need it for?” he’d argued. “We know all the tunnels ... besides we won’t have a map when we’re on the outside “ fighting. Working without the map can only make us better at reconnaissance.”
“Argus, how ... err ... nice to see you?” Remus heard Charity’s voice as she loudly greeted the caretaker.
“Excuse me, Miss Burbage,” Filch growled. “You’re in my way.”
“Oh, but Argus,” she replied. “I wanted to talk to you about ... um ... cats. I’m thinking of getting one and I can see how much you care for Mrs Norris. She’s such a ... wonderful pet; I was hoping you could give me some advice.”
After taking one last peek inside the drawer, Remus closed it silently and crept to the door. Through a crack in the frame, he could see Charity leading Argus away in the direction of the stairs. Slowly he opened the door and slipped out, hiding behind a pillar. “Quite like old times,” he muttered and then began to laugh silently.
Charity turned her head back as she reached the stairs and spotting him, she mouthed, “You owe me, Remus Lupin.”
He nodded and smiled back.
***
“Did you get it?” Charity asked him later in the staff room. He was helping himself to a mug of tea and Charity had walked in, once again carrying a pile of homework. He wondered, briefly, why she didn’t put everything in a bag to keep her hands free.
“Unfortunately not,” he replied. “Filch has either disposed of it or someone else has got hold of it.”
“Was it important?” Charity sat on the sofa and Remus sank down beside her.
“Probably not,” he lied. “Thank you for your help, though.” He grinned at her. “It was almost like being back here as a pupil. That feeling of nearly being caught. I’d forgotten how exhilarating that could be.”
“That side of school life passed me by, I’m afraid,” said Charity, sighing. “I was always far too scared of being caught. I think it’s part and parcel of being a Hufflepuff; we’re very responsible.”
“HA! Not the Hufflepuff I know,” Remus exclaimed. “She was always getting into trouble. Probably still is.”
“Anyone I know?” Charity asked, sounding casual.
Remus took a gulp of his tea and gasped as it scalded his throat. He spluttered and Charity leant over to thump him on the back. “Sorry,” he said at last. “No, I don’t think you would have known her.”
To stop himself thinking about a girl with pink hair camped out on his doorstep, Remus turned to Charity. “I owe you a favour, I believe, for leading you astray this morning.”
“Oh,” she replied, blushing profusely. “No, don’t worry about it, Remus. I was pleased to help.” She got up. “I must get back to my office. I’ll ... err ... see you later, perhaps.”
“I don’t think you’ll want to see me later,” he said. She looked puzzled. “It’s a full moon tonight, so I’ll be curled up in my office until morning. Look, Charity, I do appreciate your help today so let me at least buy you a drink or something.”
He expected her to say no, especially as he’d just reminded her of his ‘problem’ but she turned around and giving him a shy smile said, “That would be lovely, Remus.”
***
It wasn’t a relationship, as such, but over the next few weeks Remus found he spent more and more time with Charity. Sometimes she’d call round to his rooms, or he’d wander over to hers for a tea when he needed to talk or simply to escape Severus. She giggled with him over Sybil’s increasing attempts to read his fortune, and teased him when Septima became a little too forthright in her approaches. And when he left, after an evening chat, he’d peck her on the cheek and amble back to his room.
No, it wasn’t a relationship but it felt comfortable and it nearly stopped his thoughts from drifting to another.
“I expect you want Gryffindor to win,” Charity said as they took their seats in the stadium.
“Now, now, Charity,” he replied. “I’m supposed to be impartial. However ... it is my old house and my friends’ son, so, yes, I do want a lion’s win.”
“Ravenclaw has Chang back,” she said. “She’s a good Seeker. Your Harry may struggle against her.” She looked about her. “Still, at least the Dementors aren’t here. Albus has been able to keep them away this time.”
Remus looked across at Harry who was patting his Quidditch robe, no doubt checking his wand was in place in case the Dementors appeared. He watched as the Gryffindor team mounted their brooms and sped into the sky.
Harry, he could see, was having a good game. Although Cho was a good flyer, she did not have his verve and with the Firebolt, Harry’s acceleration was exhilarating to watch. Remus could not help but be transported back to his own student days here, when he’d commentated. He laughed as he heard Lee Jordan’s enthusiastic and highly biased commentary.
“I was much more circumspect in my opinions,” he remarked to Charity, when she asked why he was grinning.
Jordan’s sudden shout whipped his attention back to the game and he saw Harry diving down towards the ground, Cho following his every move. But she could not cope with his speed and suddenly she screamed as two cloaked Dementor-like figures appeared on the pitch. Remus frowned. There was no despair in the atmosphere; the day was still bright. They were not Dementors, surely.
“Expecto Patronum!” he heard Harry shout, and then, as if time had slowed immeasurably, Remus saw Harry’s Patronus emerge from his wand. It had just been a silver mist before; there had been no semblance of a form.
“Prongs!” Remus whispered and then he began to shake. He missed Harry catching the Snitch. He did not see the blur of red and gold as they congratulated his friends’ son. He sat and re-lived that stag erupting triumphant from Harry’s wand as it felled four Slytherins dressed as Dementors.
“Remus!” exclaimed Charity. “They’ve won! Your old House has won. Aren’t you going to say something?”
He looked into her sweet face. She looked concerned and he wondered if his face was showing the shock he felt on the inside. But it wasn’t just shock; something else was surfacing now “ pride. Pride that he’d been able to teach Harry something; pride that Harry’s Patronus was so reminiscent of his friend. “I must congratulate Harry,” he told her. “I’ll see you later, Charity.”
After the match, Remus returned to his quarters. He decided to skip dinner in the Great Hall. Instead he walked down to the kitchens and persuaded Frinkle, who remembered him from his student days, to give him some bread and cheese. She chuntered slightly over him helping himself in her kitchen, when there were house-elves around who would only be too happy to help, but by allowing her to add an apple pie to his tray and a bottle of elf wine, he made his escape with Frinkle placated.
He was halfway through his first glass of wine when Charity knocked on his door. She’d changed out of the robes she’d been wearing at the match, and instead was wearing a green dress that clung slightly, emphasizing her curves. She was carrying a plate of sandwiches. “You didn’t turn up for the Feast,” she said by way of explanation. “I thought you might be hungry... but I can see you’ve got some food.”
Remus swallowed his mouthful of wine and gestured for her to sit down.
“Would you care for a glass?” he asked.
She nodded then added as she eyed the pile of marking that he’d been half-heartedly plodding his way through. “I probably shouldn’t, I’ve already had some as Minerva is in celebratory mood, but I will if I’m not disturbing you.”
“It can wait,” he said wearily. He handed her a glass and their fingers touched briefly. “I’d much rather sit and chat a while.”
“You look tired,” she said softly and raised her hand to his face. Her fingertips felt soft as they traced over his cheekbone and moved down to his jaw. She leant forward and, hesitantly, began to kiss him. Her hands moved to back of his neck as she pulled him further towards her.
As Remus responded, he felt oddly disconnected from the whole process. It was as if he were going through the motions, and although he was enjoying this feeling of intimacy “ there was something not quite right. Charity felt as if she were forcing the pace for some reason. Her hand slipped beneath his shirt. Then he felt her freeze as her fingers encountered the scars on his chest. He withdrew her hand and gazed into her eyes.
It was fear he saw there; fear and possibly pity that she struggled to keep from him. He sat up and smiled ruefully. “Sorry, I think I am rather tired. Perhaps another time.”
She would not look at him, but took another slug of wine before she left. “I’ll ... err ... see you tomorrow, Remus,” she muttered as she walked away. He heard the door close and felt only relief that she’d gone.
It is better that she realises now, he thought. Before she becomes too attached and then discovers her revulsion. You’re a fool for thinking otherwise, Moony.
Finishing his glass, he picked up his quill intent on resuming his marking. But a memory rose unbidden in his mind of a seventeen-year old Tonks applying salve to his wounds. There had been no pity or fear in her eyes. She had not fled from him, and when he’d kissed her, there had been no hesitancy “ just single-minded and passionate response.
***
It was not the Potions Master who woke him this time, but Filius who was banging on his door. “He’s in the castle,” the little Charms Professor puffed. “Black got into Gryffindor Tower.”
“He got to Harry?” Remus asked in shock as he pulled on his dressing gown. Grabbing his wand, he started to run towards the stairs.
“No,” shouted Filius after him. “Harry’s safe. He got the wrong bed and attacked the Weasley boy instead.”
Remus slowed slightly to let Filius catch him. “Is he okay?”
“Yes,” wheezed Filius. “He slashed the curtains and then must have realised his mistake. When Weasley started shouting, he made a run for it. Albus has locked down the castle and needs us all to search.”
Remus started running again, leaving Filius behind as he sprinted for the third floor. He slowed as he came to the statue of the one-eyed witch. If there were signs that Black had been here then Remus knew he’d have to tell Albus everything. He pulled out his wand and touched the statue. “Dissendium!” he whispered and then the tunnel door swung open. Feeling his way around the entrance, he lit his wand and looked carefully for any evidence. He heaved a sigh of relief when he saw nothing more exciting than a Chocolate Frog wrapper. Someone knew about the tunnel, but he didn’t think Black would have bothered to eat sweets on his way to commit murder. He closed the tunnel door and walked back into the corridor.
***
Three hours later, when the castle had been thoroughly searched, the staff all gathered in the Great Hall before breakfast. Remus noticed Charity hovering at the back. She looked tired and red-eyed. He smiled at her, but she looked away.
Damn! he thought. Taking a deep breath, he edged towards her. “How are you?” he murmured.
“Fine,” she replied but her voice was shaky. She blushed. “Err ... Remus ... about last night ... I’m ... err.”
“Charity, it doesn’t matter. Look, let’s just forget it. Put it down to an excess of wine,” he said, ignoring the fact that he’d barely had half a glass. He paused. “Would you like to go into Hogsmeade later? The students won’t be there and perhaps we could grab a Butterbeer.”
She smiled gratefully. “That would be nice.”
***
They walked down to Hogsmeade at lunchtime, and slowly the awkwardness between them melted away. As they walked along the street, Charity stumbled and Remus reached out his hand to steady her. She kept a hold of his arm and together they crossed over the road.
“Remus.” He heard a voice calling him and turned his head.
There, white-faced and looking unutterably sad, stood Tonks. He saw her look across to Charity, saw her register that he was holding her arm, and watched as she turned and began to run.
He dropped Charity’s arm. “Tonks,” he shouted and began to walk towards her. He turned back to Charity. “Excuse me, I have to go. There’s something wrong.”
He caught up with her just as she turned up the side road to Honeydukes. She was slumped against the wall and he could see her gasping for breath.
“Tonks,” he said gently. “What is it? What’s wrong?”
“Is it true? Did Sirius break into Gryffindor Tower last night?”
“Yes.”
Tonks turned her face up to his, a desperate entreaty in her eyes. “Could it have been someone else? Or...or ... maybe he just wanted to see Harry again?”
“He had a knife,” Remus replied grimly. “He tried to kill a student.”
“Harry?” she asked in a muffled voice as she buried her face in her knees.
“No, he got the wrong bed. It was his friend, Ron.” Tonks looked at him blankly. “Charlie’s youngest brother, Tonks,” Remus explained calmly.
She turned her face to his and he saw the desolation wrought upon her face. “He did it, didn’t he?” she said and her chest began heaving great body-wracking sobs. “I refused to believe Kingsley this morning.” She slid down the wall and sat on the ground, tears running like a river down her cheeks. “All these years I believed in him ... and now...”
She couldn’t carry on. The devastation was too much for her to bear and Remus knew why. The foundation of her life “ Sirius’ innocence -- had been built on sand. Now that the tide had moved in, her world was crumbling.
Remus sat next to her and then leant over. Cradling Tonks in his arms, he rocked her very gently until her sobs subsided.
“It’s all gone,” she whispered over and over. “I don’t know what to do anymore, Remus. It’s like nothing matters anymore. I have nothing.”
Remus smoothed her lank, brown hair back from her face. “You have me,” he muttered into her ear.
End Notes:
Sorry for the wait. Review if you want to. I appreciate constructive criticism and gush as much as the next person.
Chapter 14 - Disillusioned by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you Alyssa (harry4lif) for beta'ing this for me.
~~~Remus sat holding her, for Merlin knew how long. They were silent, apart from his occasional reassurances that things would be all right and her quietening sobs. He glanced up at one point and saw Charity standing at the bottom of the street, but he felt no urge to join her and raised his hand apologetically. Tonks needed him, so this was where he had to stay. It started to rain, but still they did not move. Finally, when his robes were waterlogged and her cries had settled into the occasional sniff, she lifted her head.
“Sorry,” she said. “You’re getting wet.”
“That’s okay,” he murmured softly. “I could see you needed help.”
Her hair, darkened by the rain, clung in tendrils around her sweet face.
“You’re always helping me, aren’t you, Remus. First, you sneaked me back into Hogwarts; then you saved me from a dragon. All I’ve ever done is drug you with Veritaserum and shout at you for telling me the truth about Black.” He heard the bitter twist she gave Sirius’ name. He was not her beloved cousin anymore.
He stood up and held his hand out to her. “I didn’t want to be right, you know,” he said, sighing. “I spent years trying to think of a plausible explanation, but Black has never once tried to explain.” He paused. “I tried to see him once, a month or so after he was locked up, but the Ministry wouldn’t give me a pass. I think if anyone could have found out why, it would have been me.”
She accepted his hand and together they walked back to the main street. “I’m sorry,” she said wearily. “You can leave me now. Perhaps your girlfriend is still waiting for you.”
“I think Charity will have gone back now “ we have been here a while,” he muttered as he tried to avoid the pools of water that had collected in the potholes of the cobbled street.
“Oh, was that Charity Burbage?” she asked.
He nodded. “Mmm, she’s the Muggle Studies teacher. Do you know her?”
Tonks shook her head and smiled slightly “ her first smile since he’d seen her. “No, she was Head Girl the year before I started, but her sister, Patience, was a Hufflepuff prefect in my first year here. The Burbage sisters were constantly held up to me as shining examples of Hufflepuff behaviour. Patience didn’t like me much.”
“Why ever not?” Remus asked.
Tonks didn’t look at him but replied, “Various reasons. I think the fact that I kept losing House points was the main one.”
Remus frowned as he pondered her reply but then asked lightly, “Why were you losing House points?”
Tonks turned around and then, without warning, slipped on the cobbles. “Damn!” she exclaimed. She sat on that pathway clutching her ankle. He sat next to her, little caring that it was still raining and his robes were soaked. Around them people scurried under cover. Remus took her ankle in his hands.
“Does it hurt?”
She nodded and bit her lip as she tried not to cry out.
“It may be broken, so perhaps Poppy Pomfrey should take a look,” he said as his fingers gingerly touched it.
“I don’t want any fuss,” she replied wearily. “Look, I’ll just Apparate home and get it seen to there.” She tried to stand up but moaned as she put weight on it.
“At least let me look at it back at Hogwarts. If it is broken then Poppy can mend it easily,” Remus said persuasively.
Tonks looked up at him and he could see uncertainty in her eyes. He wondered if now that her trust in Sirius had been shattered, she was also unsure of him. Then she shrugged. “Okay, but I don’t want to keep you from Charity.”
Remus checked his pocket watch. “Well, as I’ve been sitting with you for around three quarters of an hour, I sincerely doubt she’ll still be here.” He brought out his wand tapped her ankle and muttered, “Ferula!” Instantly, some bandages appeared and wound themselves tight about her ankle.
She sniffed and took hold of his arm whilst she attempted to stand up. “Sorry, did I ruin your date?”
“It wasn’t really a date. Charity’s a friend,” he said. Then he tucked his arm around her and supported her as they half walked-half limped back to Hogwarts.
As they approached the wrought iron gates, Tonks shuddered slightly at the Dementors gliding towards them and Remus saw her hand grasp her wand. “So, why did you lose House points when you were a first year?” he asked to keep her mind off them. “Charity tells me that Hufflepuffs never break rules.”
It worked. She smiled, albeit a touch sadly. “Ah, well, you see in my first year, I wasn’t too happy about being a Hufflepuff. I was quite convinced the Hat had made a mistake, so I used to try and sneak into Charlie’s common room.”
“You wanted to be a Gryffindor?”
Tonks turned her head to face him. “Of course I wanted to be a Gryffindor, Remus. I’d met Sirius and his exceptionally cool friends.” She laughed at the astonishment on his face. “Plus I met Charlie on the train and I really wanted to stay with him.”
He chuckled. “So it wasn’t my coolness that persuaded you, rather Charlie’s presence.”
She was silent and as he looked across, he saw a solitary tear sliding down her face. “Sorry,” she said. “I was just remembering my Sorting. The Hat said I was loyal to a fault. I never realised before today that loyalty was a fault.” She shuddered again and this time Remus held her closer.
“Come on,” he said soothingly. “Let’s get you inside and I’ll look at that ankle.”
Remus half supported and half carried her inside, nodding to Filch as they went past. For his part, Filch glowered at the pair and muttered something about puddles on the floor, so Remus quickly cast a drying spell over himself and Tonks before they mounted the stairs. Slowly, they walked up to his rooms on the second floor and there Remus deposited her on the couch, raising her ankle onto a cushion. “How does it feel now?” he asked.
She gave a wan smile. “A bit better, actually. I can move it, anyway.” She wiggled her toes through the bandages.
“Probably not broken then,” he replied. She was lying back against one of his rather tatty cushions, looking pale and still sad. “Why don’t you just rest there a while and I’ll make you a cup of tea. You don’t have to talk or anything “ just relax.”
“Thank you,” she murmured as he handed her a mug. There was a long pause and Remus saw her looking around the room, taking in his meagre possessions. He wasn’t ashamed of his penury; he had long since ceased to be ashamed of the prejudice that stopped him gaining regular work, but for some reason he wished he’d had something more interesting to show this girl than musty books and old photograph albums.
“You take very good care of your things,” she said, breaking the silence. “I don’t know if you remember the state of my room in Romania. I’m an awful slob. It drives my mum up the wall.”
“How are your parents?” he asked, wondering if she would only indulge in polite chit-chat.
“I don’t know,” muttered Tonks. “I haven’t seen them since November.” She took a sip of tea and then took a deep breath. “We had a huge row when news emerged that Sirius had been here and slashed the Fat Lady’s portrait. I told them they were wrong about him, that there had to be a reason he needed to get into the Tower. Dad “ Merlin, I’d never seen him that angry before “ well, he ended up telling me I was a ‘bloody fool’ and I had to stop all my nonsense.” Remus could see tears welling in her eyes again which she angrily dashed away. “He was right, wasn’t he? Everyone was right and I was a ‘bloody fool’.”
“I don’t think you’re a fool,” said Remus.
“Oh, gods, Remus. Stop being so bloody kind. As you pointed out, I based my entire life around a day spent with my cousin and his friends. He took me for one lousy ride on his motorbike, and I was so entranced by him that I spent years looking for answers. And I was so proud every time someone said I was like him.” Her voice started to rise. “I saw it as a compliment when you said I was like him “ a traitorous, murdering “ oh, Merlin, how could I have been so stupid?”
He could see horror and utter misery envelop her face. Quickly, he sat down on the arm of the sofa and took her by the shoulders. “Stop this!” he ordered. “You weren’t at fault, Tonks. We were all taken in. All those years spent at school with him. I should have known. I should have seen what he was becoming. It was only towards the end that I ...” He stopped unwilling to continue.
“You what?” she asked. She moved across the sofa leaving a space for him to sit in.
Remus shifted down next to her and stared at the wall. “There was a traitor in the Order. It was someone close to James and Lily. And Sirius stopped being quite so friendly towards me. At the time, I wasn’t sure if it was to do with his brother “ Regulus had gone missing “ but then I wondered if perhaps he’d turned. Although he was closest to James, we’d always got on well. It was Sirius who made me feel as if being a werewolf was a bar to nothing. He made me feel normal.” He paused and, to his horror, he felt a lump in his throat.
“That’s what I meant about you being like him,” he said at last. “You’ve never once shown any fear or revulsion at what I am “ and that’s very rare.” He felt her hand on his arm and lifted his head to look at her.
“I know a bit about prejudice, Remus,” she said softly. “A Metamorphmagus is still considered a curse in some families “ you know that. I met Narcissa Malfoy last year and she was quite sure I was going to infect her son if I got near him.” She laughed bitterly. “Do you know why we’re so rare?” Remus was silent. He knew the stories but also realised she needed to speak. “Because in the old days a Metamorphmagus was considered a danger to the Magical Secrecy Act, so they were either locked away, or were unable to marry and have children. That, of course, was a drain on a magical purse to have your child always living with you, so some families got rid of their troublesome child “ very discreetly “ and the Ministry turned a blind eye.”
“Not now, though,” he replied after a while. “I mean, look at you, Tonks. You’re nearly an Auror. You’ve made it in spite of everything.”
“Mmm, I know and I suppose if we’re going to debate over who has the hardest life, then you’ll always win “ goddamn you.” She grinned at him and Remus laughed unable to believe that she’d been able to turn this into a joke. Then she sighed. “I think it explains, in part, why I was so attached to Sirius. He didn’t make me feel abnormal. He just thought I was cool. Despite him being in Azkaban, I turned up at Hogwarts feeling proud of my uniqueness. More fool me.”
“Why?” he asked curiously. His tea was cold now and he picked up her empty cup from the floor and levitated them to the hearthside.
“Oh, nothing, really. I was in Hufflepuff “ you know the House that accepts anyone “ but not everyone was happy that I’d been placed there. Prejudice is everywhere.”
Various reasons, she’d said when he asked why Patience had disliked her. He’d wondered what she meant at the time. He opened his mouth to ask, but as he looked across at Tonks, he noticed how tired she was.
“Would you like me to take you up to see Poppy now?” he asked.
Tonks flexed her foot. “I think it’s fine,” she said, yawning. “I should leave you in peace. You probably have lots of hideous marking to do.”
Remus shrugged. “I don’t have anything that pressing, actually, or I wouldn’t have been in Hogsmeade. So, you can rest a while if you want, and then we’ll see about getting you back to London. ”
“Thanks,” she said and yawned again. “I’m not sure I have the energy to go anywhere at the moment. I’ll leave before dinner, though.”
“Would you like me to ask Albus Dumbledore if you could stay? I’m sure he’d be delighted to see you again. I get the impression he’s rather fond of you,” said Remus.
She shook her head. “I’d really rather not see anyone at the moment.” She did a double take. “Does he talk about me?”
“Mmm, he mentioned something about you helping him last year. You looked into some archives or something?” Remus replied. He stopped as he saw a look of shock and guilt cross her face. “What’s the matter?”
“Oh, gods, Remus. I’m sorry. I’ve been so selfish. All this time we’ve known each other and you know everything about me. I rattle on and on about my family and I’ve never once asked you about things, have I?” Remus watched as she became more agitated, her hands pleating the fabric of her robe.
“Tonks, what are you on about?” he asked in bemusement.
She took a deep breath. “Last year, when all those pupils were petrified, Professor Dumbledore asked me to do some research in the Ministry archives.” She paused and then swallowed hard. Remus saw her hair turning a faint shade of blue and he smiled because it was the first time she’d changed her hair colour all afternoon. “I spoke to the librarian.”
And then he understood. “Mrs Goodbody,” he replied wryly. “I expect she told you about my father.”
Tonks looked at the floor. “Err, yeah, she did.” She looked up at him and tentatively touched his arm. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
Remus sighed. “Why would you? It was a long time ago and ... well ... I don’t really like to talk about it.”
Tonks flushed and he realised he must have sounded harsh, but then she spoke again. “What about your mum? Is she still alive?”
“Mmm, I don’t see her that often, but she’s alive and remarried. It’s ... awkward,” he said lamely
“Oh, don’t you get on with your stepfather or something?” she blurted out, then gasped. “Sorry, that’s very nosey of me. Just tell me to shut up.”
“No, that’s okay, Tonks.” Remus sat back on the sofa and nestled himself into a cushion. He raised his eyes to the ceiling, conscious, while he was speaking, that her hand had not left his arm. “Did you know my mum was a Muggle?” he asked at last. She shook her head. “Well, she is, and she married my dad when she was very young “ only sixteen. You can imagine it, can’t you? Not only does she have to cope with the magical world, then her six year old son gets infected with lycanthropy and finally her husband is killed “ probably by Death Eaters “ although that was never proved.” He paused and Tonks squeezed his hand.
“She grabbed the chance to get out of this strange world and married a Muggle. I’ve met him and they’re happy, but obviously he knows nothing about all this and just assumes I’m a scruffy weirdo who can’t be bothered to work,” he finished.
“Scruffy’s a bit strong,” Tonks said after a while, and grinned impishly. “Although he may be right about the weirdo bit.”
Remus laughed loudly “ the first time he’d felt like laughing for ages. What was it about this girl that even when her own life seemed to be falling apart, she could find something to joke about? “You, Nymphadora Tonks, are incorrigible.”
“Oy! Less of the Nymphadora,” she cried and whacked him on the head with a cushion.
Reaching for his own cushion he playfully whacked her back but the old cover ripped and suddenly the room was flying with goose feathers. Giggling hysterically, Tonks stood up, but she’d forgotten about her ankle and fell forward on top of Remus. He stared at her, feathers stuck in her hair, wincing slightly at the pain in her foot, and then he kissed her. She responded instantly and he knew this was right. There was no hesitancy, nothing forced in her actions. Her fingertips delicately traced one thin scar that ran to his neck and he felt as if he were drowning under her caress. He ached to be with her.
Not like it was with Charity.The thought was like cold water and reluctantly he pulled away.
“Don’t stop,” she said. She clasped him round the neck and simply gazed, “Please, Remus. I’m not too young. You’re not too dangerous or any of the millions of reasons you’re about to lecture me about.”
He unlocked her hands from his neck and clasped them in his own. “You are too young and I am too dangerous, and there are more than a million reasons why this isn’t wise ... but the main one is that you’re upset about Sirius, and I won’t take advantage of that.”
She let out a muffled sob as he pulled her to his chest. He could feel her tears soaking through his robe and slowly he began to pull soft feathers out of her hair. There was something else, something she hadn’t told him. Something in her heart that she couldn’t bear to utter and he thought he knew what it was.
“Tell me,” he whispered. “Tell me what you’re most upset about.”
She shuddered convulsively. “I want my cousin back. I want to be back in that flat with all of you laughing, and me asleep on his chest and James carrying me up to bed. And ...” her eyes widened in horror, “Oh gods, Remus, he’ll be given the Dementors Kiss,” she cried, her sobs wracking through her body.
“I know, I know,” he muttered soothingly as he placed a light kiss on her brow. He had wanted his friends back for years, but had long since stopped believing in miracles. He hated Sirius for what he’d done, for how he’d torn apart all their lives, but the thought of Padfoot’s soul being sucked from his body made him shiver with cold dread.
After a while, he felt her breathing slow and peering round he saw she was asleep. In repose, her face lost its anguish and she looked again like the seventeen-year-old girl who’d camped on his doorstep. Carefully, he laid her back on the sofa and covered her with a blanket from his bed. Then, after settling himself into an armchair, he continued with his marking, checking every now and then that she was at peace.
The sun was slowly climbing down the sky, its rays catching his window and casting long shadows when there was a knock at the door.
“Remus,” he heard Septima call. “Are you there?”
Hurriedly, he answered the door, glancing back to see if Tonks had been disturbed, but she was still asleep. He opened the door to see Septima and Charity standing there.
“Charity wondered if you were all right,” Septima began stridently. “She said you’d been caught up in some crisis, with your sister, perhaps?”
He noticed Charity flushing at Septima’s words, clearly uncomfortable at being here.
“I don’t have a sister,” Remus replied. He could see both women trying to look in his room through the crack in the door. “Can I help you with something?”
“I-I just wanted to check that things were okay,” stuttered Charity. “That young girl seemed very distressed. She “ she’s not a student is she, because if she is, Remus, she really shouldn’t have been in Hogsmeade and you should report her.”
“She’s not a student,” he replied sharply. “Look, ladies, if that’s all then I really would like to get back to my marking. Perhaps I’ll see you at dinner tonight.”
Raising one eyebrow, Septima turned on her stiletto heels and pulled Charity by the arm.
“Remus!” He closed his eyes as he heard Tonks’ tired and slightly anxious voice. Septima and Charity swung back around, just as Tonks reached the door and stared out over his shoulder. Her hair was still stuck with feathers, and she‘d wrapped herself in the blanket. “Ohh, sorry,” she mumbled and then looked at both of them with interest. “Hello, Professor Vector.”
Remus felt his insides drop, remembering the confrontation with Catalina. Please, behave, he thought.
Septima’s mouth curved into a delighted smirk. “Why, it’s Nymphadora Tonks, isn’t it? Remus, you never told me you knew possibly my most challenging pupil. What are you doing here?” she asked and pushed her way into the room. Charity followed, her eyes darting from the floor to the room, not looking at Remus.
“We’re old friends,” explained Remus. Tonks, he was pleased to see, had regained some colour in her cheeks and her hair, which was turning pink.
“Hmm,” murmured Septima dangerously, “I can see that. Been indulging in pillow fights with Nymphadora, have you, Remus?”
“It’s Tonks,” replied Tonks automatically, before adding. “I’m not your pupil anymore, so I’d appreciate you not calling me by that name, now that we’re both adults.”
“Still as touchy, I see.” They stared at each other; Septima lowered her gaze first and then turned to Charity. “Tonks here, was a pupil of mine when I first started teaching. An experience for both of us, I think it can be said.”
“I think we should go,” mumbled Charity. She turned towards the door. “Sorry we bothered you.”
Oh hell, thought Remus. He knew he should go after her, to explain what had happened, but he was sick of having to explain his every single move, sick of having to be so defensive about his life. “Septima,” he said and gestured to the door. “If you don’t mind, Tonks and I were having a private chat.”
She smiled sardonically. “I quite understand.” She walked to the door, her stilettos tapping at the floor. “Lovely to see you again, Nymphadora. Enjoy your ‘chat’.”
As she closed the door, Tonks stuck her tongue out childishly. “Bitch!”
Remus laughed. “I take it she wasn’t your favourite teacher then.”
Tonks scowled and began folding the blanket up. “Merlin, no. She was a right cow to me, just because I wasn’t good at Arithmancy. Stupid subject anyway.”
“I rather liked Arithmancy,” Remus replied as he took the blanket from her. “Why did you take it if you didn’t like it?”
Tonks shrugged and waving her wand, she started to clear up the feathers, but her attempts were patchy at best and soon the feathers were floating around the room again. She sneezed as they flew in her face. Remus blew them away with a jet of air from his wand.
“My mum,” she said when the last of the feathers had been cleared away. “She loved Arithmancy and I suppose I followed her advice. I could have given it up at the end of the third year, but I’m a stubborn witch “ didn’t want to admit I’d made a mistake. I got an Acceptable in the end. ” She sighed. “I should get going. I’m supposed to be on surveillance with Kingsley this evening.”
Remus picked up her cloak and draped it over her shoulders, then Summoned his own from the door hook. “I’ll walk you down, just in case that ankle gives way again.” Tonks smiled gratefully and together they walked out of his room and down the three flights of stairs to the Entrance Hall. The pupils were heading down to the Great Hall for dinner, and he could see Tonks looking around avidly, perhaps hoping to catch sight of Harry.
“You’ll miss your dinner,” she said fretfully as she just missed the trick step. “You really don’t have to come with me.”
“I happen to be on very good terms with the house-elves here, who are only too pleased to load me up with food and drink,” he replied, smiling. “Besides, I’ll make it for main course, I’m sure.”
Tonks turned around, and bumped into a small boy who was racing to catch up with his friends. “Ooops,” she said as he nearly sent her toppling down the stairs.
“Careful, Colin,” Remus called after him. He held Tonks’ arm. “You could always stay for the feast. You know Dumbledore would only be too happy to see you. And Pomona still gets a glint in her eye when she remembers thatmatch.”
“Uh, I don’t think I’d be a particularly popular guest with all your colleagues although it would be fun to see Professor Snape again,” she replied and then giggled. “When I was here, Septima always seemed to make a bee-line for him. Your arrival must have put his nose out of joint. I never knew you were such a witch-magnet.”
“You got on well with him, didn’t you,” said Remus, ignoring her last comment.
They reached the main doors and hurried out. The evening was drawing in, and a cool breeze fluttered through her hair.
“I don’t think anyone gets on with him, do they?” she said as she drew her cloak around her. “He got me through my exams, and I think he appreciated the work I put in. Charlie hated him, but ...” She shrugged. “... I hated Professor Kettleburn.”
Remus chuckled. “Kettleburn was the scariest teacher I had too. I was so pleased to drop that subject. Harry is very lucky to have Hagrid this year.”
“What’s he like?” Tonks asked curiously. “Harry, I mean.”
Remus smiled at her and the sudden image of Harry when he’d first seen him fly sprang into his head. “He looks like James, flies like James and is without a doubt as reckless as James, but there’s a lot of Lily in him. Do you remember them?”
“Remus, I told you, I remember everything about that day. The motorbike, James pinching my fish fingers, Lily teasing Sirius about having a girlfriend, you arriving all dusty from the Floo, and Peter spilling his beer when my hair went green.” Her face fell. “It was my perfect day. As if I’d been drip fed Felix Felicis. Sorry, I shouldn’t talk about this anymore; it hasn’t done me much good believing in him for all these years.”
They walked down the winding path towards the edge of the grounds in silence. He could see, as clear as if he’d been a Legilimans, that she was reliving that day in her mind and he could not bear the bitter set to her expression. At last he spoke. “If you hadn’t thought him innocent, Tonks, do you think you’d have worked so hard to be an Auror?”
She made a face. “Don’t know.”
“What about that Quidditch match when you claimed the record? Would you have attempted that if you hadn’t been so angry with Charlie and that Skeeter article?”
“No,” she admitted quietly. “Probably not. What’s your point though?”
“I’m not saying you wouldn’t have achieved these things, but ever since you crashed into my life, you’ve always had a purpose.” She opened her mouth but he hushed her by taking her hand. “In the end, Tonks, it doesn’t matter that your belief in Sirius was misplaced. It has shaped you into what you are and ...”You’re amazing, he wanted to say, astounding, incredible, remarkable. “... that is someone who’s going to be a bloody good Auror.”
She smiled her wide smile and he felt his heart leap as she leant forward and kissed him on the cheek. “You, Professor Lupin, are a lovely man. I hope your pupils know that.” She sighed with what he thought was regret. “I really do have to get going, Kingsley will be waiting. We’re going to stake out Sirius’ old flat again.”
She smiled at something, a memory perhaps, then looked perplexed. “How,” she asked suddenly, “did the four of you get your nicknames? Sirius never did tell me.”
Surprised at the question, Remus closed his eyes trying to dredge up the reasons they’d always given in the past. “Well,” he began slowly, “Moony ... that’s self-explanatory. Wormy ... Peter was always worming his way out of trouble. Prongs,” Merlin, what was the story behind Prongs? Ah, yes. “... James had a pronged Herbology fork that got badly bent out of shape, and ...” He stopped. Tonks looked at him sadly.
“Tell me,” she said quietly.
Remus sighed. “A padfoot is a name given to a thief, from years ago. Black used to steal our Chocolate Frogs with alarming ease.”
“Ah, I see,” replied Tonks. She looked a bit puzzled still, and he knew his answers were sketchy. She leant over, pulling a last feather from his hair. Twirling it between her fingers, she smiled and then, turning sharply on the spot to Apparate, she said, “A thief, eh? I always thought it had something to do with dogs.”
The word had hit him like a whiplash. ‘Dogs’ Did she know? he thought as he walked back to Hogwarts. Had Sirius told his six-year-old cousin about Padfoot? It would have been unthinkable when they were teenagers with this huge shared secret, but later, perhaps he let something slip to her. Remus shook his head. She couldn’t know. She hadn’t sounded sly, it had been an off the cuff remark. A coincidence. He had nothing to worry about.
“Joining us, Remus?” called Filius from across the hallway. The little wizard was trotting into the Great Hall, late as usual.
Remus paused at the bottom of the stairs. He was tired and wanted nothing more than a quiet meal in his room, and he also wanted to avoid Charity and Septima, but he knew they’d still be there tomorrow, so taking a deep breath he smiled. “Lead on, Filius, I’m so hungry I could eat a Thestral.”
He had wanted to sidle in unnoticed, but Septima had called out to him and proceeded to tell everyone in stage whispers about his visitor, implying Merlin-knew-what about Remus.
“It was Tonks,” he said, cutting short Septima’s speech before she mentioned the feathers.
“My Nymphadora!” exclaimed Pomona rapturously. “Such a lovely girl. You remember her, don’t you, Minerva? That match!”
“Of course I remember her,” replied Minerva witheringly, then, turning to Remus, she added warmly. “Delightful girl and a diligent student, why was she here, Remus?”
“Bit upset about recent events,” Remus explained. He could feel Snape’s eyes boring into him, and, thinking not just of Tonks but also Harry, he looked straight at him and said, “Unfair, really, that she gets bogged down by a past that isn’t even her own.” Snape looked away.
The conversation veered away from one student and into the discussion of others. Remus listened whilst Filius and Bathsheba recounted tales from before he was there, Albus occasionally offering his own insights into one particular Gryffindor who had caused him problems when he was the Head of House. It didn’t take a genius to work out who the Gryffindor was when Minerva hastily changed the subject. The only person who did not contribute to the discussion was Charity, who sat three spaces away from him, picking at her food. Remus tried to catch her eye, but she refused to look at him.
It had been an eventful day, even by Hogwarts standards, and Remus was tired. Filius had invited him around for a dram of Firewhisky, but he’d declined as he longed for his bed. He knew there was one thing he had to do before he went to sleep. Climbing up the stairs towards the Ravenclaw Tower, he veered left until he came to Charity’s room. He took a deep breath and then knocked firmly on the door. She was a long time answering and he nearly walked away, but finally he heard her padding towards the door.
“Hello,” she said, slightly sullenly.
“May I come in?” he asked politely. She held the door open and gestured to an armchair by the fire.
“Your friend got home all right, I hope,” she said quietly.
“Yes... yes she did. Look, Charity, I need to explain and ... to apologise,” he said, but she interrupted with a wave of her hand.
“I’m having a drink. Do you want one?” Remus shook his head as Charity walked over to a glass cabinet and began to pour herself a glass of wine. She took a sip then turned back to him. “I don’t really know why you’re here, Remus. There’s nothing to explain. After all, we’re hardly dating are we “ not after last night!”
“No,” he said quietly. “I suppose we’re not. I just feel awful for leaving you there like that.”
“I’m a big girl now, Remus, nearly your age in fact; I think I can get home by myself. Obviously your young friend needed your assistance.” She was swaying slightly as she sat down and Remus realised she’d had more than one sip of wine. She laughed. “And all those feathers. Wow, Professor Lupin, if I’d known ...”
“I should leave,” he said hurriedly. “Perhaps we can talk in the morning.”
“Mmm, good idea,” she said nastily. “We can have a mature discussion ,like grown-ups, about what we want. Oh, let me see, you can tell me how we want different things, you want someone else in your bed for instance ...”
He felt anger surface in him. Why was he on the defensive all the time? He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. “Tonks is a friend “ a good friend “ but that’s all. Today she was in trouble. I’m sorry I ruined your day, but she needed me.”
There was a long silence. Remus got up and walked to the door, but stopped when he heard a small sigh. He turned back to see Charity staring at him. “I thought you liked me,” she said quietly. “We’ve spent time together and we seemed to click, don’t you think?”
“As friends, perhaps,” he replied. He walked back to his chair and sat opposite her. “I think last night showed that we’re probably best off not being anything else, don’t you think?”
Slowly she lifted her head and he was saddened to see tears in her eyes. “Sorry,” she whispered. “I wanted things to work, but then ...” She swallowed. “Maybe when we know each other better ...” She trailed off and he took her hand.
“I can’t change what I am, Charity. If it repels you, then it’s best we know now, don’t you think?”
She held her glass in both hands, staring at the wine as she swirled it around her glass. “It wasn’t just me though, was it?” She raised her head and looked him square in the eyes. “Don’t pretend, Remus. You may say Nymphadora’s just a friend, but I saw you with her. I don’t think you’ll let yourself get close to anyone whilst she’s around.”
End Notes:
OOOH, well, Professor Lupin, what about those feathers? Umm, next chapter is proving hard to write ... bear with me.
Chapter 15 - Truth Will Out by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you, as ever, to Alyssa (Harry4lif) for beta'ing this chapter.
** indicates a line taken from Harru Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, chapter seventeen, Cat, Rat and Dog.
Remus sat in his office on the weekend after Black’s attack on Ron, waiting. He was half expecting Harry to turn up again because it was a Hogsmeade weekend, and Remus knew he was confined to the castle. He watched Ron leave from his study window, and briefly mused on the fact that the two boys appeared to have fallen out with that extraordinarily bright girl. Would Harry tell him about the quarrel? He wondered what advice he could give to a thirteen year old boy except ‘Stick by your friends, Harry. They’re the most important thing in your life.’ But was that true? Was that the correct thing to say? If he hadn’t been so craven in his years here, if he hadn’t been so slavishly grateful to his friends, then perhaps the whole tragedy of James and Lily’s deaths could have been averted.
“If I’d pointed out all those times when I thought Padfoot was wrong, would that have put you off him, Prongs?” he asked the empty air. “If I’d told you my suspicions, would you have made someone else Secret-Keeper? If you had, then you’d still be alive.”
When Harry didn’t appear straight away and he saw Hermione (looking slightly bemused, it had to be said) leave Hogwarts with the Patil twins and Lavender Brown, Remus walked to across to his desk and pulled out an old set of Gobstones. It wasn’t much fun playing alone, but Remus couldn’t settle down to marking “ not today and at least Gobstones kept his mind from drifting to Tonks.
Tonks had written to him the next day, sending him a letter by owl to thank him for being kind. It had been a polite letter, where she’d apologised for being an embarrassment and had informed him that she was soon to sit her final exams. Remus had been heartened to hear that, because he’ been afraid that after they’d met she’d do something stupid like drop out of her course. But she sounded resolute in this letter, and hardened.
“Why did you return to Hogwarts, Black?” he said. “You could have just escaped and lived abroad. You won’t get to Harry and your presence here nearly defeated the one person who believed in you.”
He clutched at a Gobstone. It was a set his father had bought him for his twelfth birthday “ his first birthday at Hogwarts “ and Remus could still remember the excitement when he’d unwrapped the package. They’d sat in their dormitory all day, and, for once, Remus had been better than the others had at something. James, he remembered, had affected boredom after he’d lost three games in a row, but Sirius had become competitive. Peter ... he couldn’t remember what Peter had done that day. Frowning, he even wondered if Peter had been there. He didn’t want to forget any of his dead friends and he treasured all the memories ... but Peter, he felt ashamed of this, he often overlooked Peter.
The Gobstone exploded in his hand, so Remus hurriedly wiped the foul smelling liquid off with a flannel by the washstand. He should be writing back to Tonks, concentrating on the present, not trying to work out where people were twenty-one years before.
He sat at his desk, pulled out his grey-feathered quill and began to write.
Dear Tonks,
Thank you for your letter. I’m pleased you’re studying hard.
Merlin, how dull was he? This was like the letters he used to receive from his Aunt Lucille. He gnawed at his bottom lip, considering. Then he screwed up the paper and began again.
Dear Tonks - another pause.
There's no need for you to apologise and you certainly weren’t an embarrassment. I’m pleased your studying is going well and I know you’ll make a wonderful Auror.
‘Oh, bloody hell, Moony, is that really what you want to say to the girl -- that you’re pleased her studies are going well?’ Remus jerked up. The voice in his head had sounded so much like Padfoot at that point, that it was as if he were in the room. He looked at the letter and tore it up. What did he want to say? He closed his eyes. He wanted to ask her back here. He wanted another fight with cushions and this time when he kissed her he wouldn’t pull away, but indulge himself in the taste of her lips and the scent of her skin.
Would it be so wrong? Here at Hogwarts he had full employment and access to Wolfsbane. Perhaps he could be the one to break the strange jinx on this particular post, and if not, he wondered if Albus would be prepared to offer him something else. Tonks didn’t see the age difference as a bar, so why should he?
He picked up the quill again and dipped it in the ink, preparing to invite her here, perhaps to see the Quidditch final. He could introduce her to Harry; she’d like that.
“LUPIN!” Snape’s voice bellowed from his fire grate.
Oh, gods, what now? Remus sighed. He’d tried his hardest with Severus, but the Potions master would not meet him half way. He strongly suspected that Neville’s Boggart had put paid to any chance they’d ever be ... well, not friends exactly, but civil colleagues. Remember the Wolfsbane, remember the Wolfsbane, he thought as he stepped into the fire.
He should not have been surprised to see Harry in Severus’ office. There wasn’t anyone in Hogwarts who induced that amount of ire. Remus tried to smile as he spiralled through the fire, but as soon as he landed Severus thrust a wad of paper into his hand.
Bloody hell! It’s the Map. He felt like smiling, and then, as he read the words that had magically appeared on the parchment, he had an insane urge to giggle at Wormtail’s answer. One quick glance at Harry’s face brought him back, fully focused on the problem in hand.
He looked directly at Severus, his brain whirring, and heard himself talk about joke shops and Zonko’s. He knew Severus wasn’t fooled, but he had to stop Harry from learning the truth. If he found out James had helped create the Marauders’ Map, then he’d no doubt demand it back, and then he’d never be safe. If he saw Black on the Map, he would run towards the danger, desperate to take on the man who’d betrayed his parents. That’s my job, Remus thought bitterly.
He’d never been so pleased to see Ron Weasley in all his life. Out of breath, with windswept hair, it was clear he’d run all the way from Hogwarts. At last, Remus fully understood. Harry hadn’t just been caught with the Map-- he’d been in Hogsmeade, no doubt with James’ Cloak. Suddenly angry, as he remembered the sacrifice of his friends to keep their son safe, he spoke in a harsher tone than he meant to. He saw Harry’s face fall as he swept away and knew the words about James and Lily had hit home.
Letting himself back into his office, he hurriedly locked the door, and then opened up the map at his desk.
“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good,” Remus intoned. For a brief second he thought that the magic from the map had faded, but then it sprang into life.
“Mr Prongs wonders where Mr Moony has been all these years,” he read and began laughing.
“Mr Wormtail would like to congratulate Mr Moony on recovering the Map.”
Oh, gods, this brought it all back. The four of them, invincible, roaming the castle for no reason except that they could. His eyes were drawn to two dots walking slowly back to Gryffindor Tower. Harry and Ron, it seemed, had stopped to talk to a third dot “ Hermione Granger. Remus wondered what they were saying, whether they were continuing this argument with her. The dots were still and then suddenly the Hermione dot was moving close to the Ron dot. She’s either slapped him, or hugged him, Remus thought. I suppose I’ll find out at supper.
As he folded up the map, more words appeared.
“Mr Padfoot wonders how on earth Mr Moony managed to recover the map without his friends.”
Remus looked at the sheet of parchment on his desk. He would write to Tonks, but not invite her here. Black would return and he couldn’t afford to be distracted.
“Mischief Managed,” he said grimly.
***
Hogwarts didn’t come to a standstill in June, but the pace certainly slackened for Remus. The exams he’d set were over and whilst the O.W.L. and N.E.W.T students were sitting their exams, he found he had a lot more free time. With Charity keeping her distance, Remus toyed again with the idea of inviting Tonks for a visit, or perhaps Apparating down to London to take her out.
“You’re a fool, Moony,” he muttered one morning after a particularly restless night. “You’re too old for her.” But he found his thoughts at breakfast were straying to her smile and that laugh as the feathers had cascaded over her.
“Something amusing you, Remus?” asked Filius who had hurried to the table. The Ravenclaw Head of House looked unusually harassed and despite his distraction, Remus was curious.
“Not much, Filius,” he replied. He picked up the toast rack and offered it to the Charms teacher. “How are you this morning?”
Filius selected some toast and then began to spread it with butter. Reaching across for some marmalade, he jogged the teapot with his arm. Hastily, Remus steadied it before the scalding liquid flooded the table.
“Merlin’s beard!” exclaimed the Charms teacher. “Thank goodness you were here, Remus. I’m all thumbs today.”
“Mmm.” Remus nodded. “I have noticed. Is there anything I can do to help?”
Filius sighed. “Not really. I’m always like this at the end of the year. I feel so anxious for my students. They’re under so much pressure to do well.”
“I would have thought Ravenclaw had very little to prove,” Remus said in surprise. “I mean, you’re all very bright, aren’t you?”
Filius chewed his toast, and deliberated before replying. “We’re selected for our intelligence, that’s true, but, don’t you see, that’s where the pressure lies. Ravenclaws are supposed to do well. Not like you Gryffindors.”
“Well, if it’s any comfort, I think your House will do very well in Defence,” Remus stated solemnly. “Penelope Clearwater’s homework was always exemplary.”
Filius beamed. “Yes, Penelope is one of my highest hopes.” He lowered his voice. “I was awfully afraid she’d get distracted by the Weasley boy, but I’m pleased my fears were misplaced.” He chuckled. “If it had been Percy’s older brother, then I would have had trouble.”
“Who, Charlie?” asked Remus wondering suddenly and with a pang if Charlie Weasley had distracted Tonks.
“Oh, you know Charlie, then,” Filius replied. As Remus nodded, he continued, “I meant Bill, actually. Former Head Boy and now a Curse Breaker for Gringotts.” He paused. “Charlie was more interested in Quidditch, from what I recall. Not bad at Charms, but not a patch on his brothers.”
Remus smiled, wondering if Charlie felt he always had to compete. He’d seemed very sure of himself in Romania “ perhaps he just needed to find his niche. “It’s a good job he found his dragons then,” he said. “That’s how I know Charlie, you know. I was working with him. He told me it was Hagrid who sparked his interest.”
Filius nodded in agreement and then sighed. Remus knew what he was thinking about: Hagrid had not appeared for any meals this week and was spending every spare moment he had with his Hippogriff.
“Do they have an execution date for Buckbeak?” he asked quietly.
Filius sighed again and put down his toast. “The Executioner is arriving with the Minister tomorrow afternoon.”
Remus blinked. “Fudge is coming here? I wouldn’t have thought he’d bother with this case.”
Filius pursed his lips. “I’ve known Cornelius Fudge for a long time. The man is incapable of not interfering. Besides, I think he needs to talk to Albus about the Black situation.”
Remus rose from the table. “I think I’ll make myself scarce then. Fudge wasn’t exactly happy when I was appointed.”
Filius reached out a hand and touched him on the arm. “You’re proving them all wrong, Remus. I hope you know how highly we hold you in regard.”
For a moment, Remus felt a lump in his throat. Unable to speak, he simply smiled at the older man, and then falteringly made his way to his office.
Tomorrow, Buckbeak would be executed. If Remus had learnt one thing about Harry in his year here, it was that he was unfailingly loyal “ all three were. They would use the Cloak to visit their friend and that’s when Harry would be vulnerable. There was a knock at the door, but before Remus could cry ‘Enter’, Severus walked in. Is he hoping to catch me out? thought Remus, smiling.
“Your potion,” Snape simply stated. His eyes scanned the desk, and Remus was pleased that the Map was in the drawer. “Let me know if you require more.”
“Thank you,” Remus replied. He paused. “Severus, I really do appreciate this, you know. I realise I’m very lucky to have a colleague with your talent here at Hogwarts.”
Severus stared at him. “Dumbledore has requested my services. Who am I to disagree with him?”
“But given our history, Severus, I wouldn’t blame you if you’d tampered with the Potion, yet you haven’t “ ever “ and for that I’m grateful.”
The Potions Master pursed his lips and then turning around, he walked to the door. His hand was on the handle when he spoke. “I am not in the habit of playing pranks, Lupin,” he said acidly. “I never was.”
***
Remus spent most of the following afternoon in his office, studying the Map. Logically he knew that Harry would not skip lessons to see Hagrid -- he was too conspicuous to be able to absent himself “ but still he could not help checking the Harry named dot. He skipped dinner, not wanting to be away from the Map, but watched as Harry, Ron and Hermione sat in the Great Hall. Then, sure enough, he saw the three dots move not to Gryffindor Tower but to and empty chamber off the Entrance Hall. Remus grimaced- it was the same place James, Sirius and Peter had used to hide in before they joined him in the Shack. He pondered whether he should go down and drag them back to their common room, but decided, in the end to keep an eye on them. He needed to keep their trust, not set a wedge between them.
He watched as they hurried down the path to Hagrid’s hut but there the Map ended. All Remus could do now was wait. It wouldn’t be long before they left. Remus saw Fudge, Macnair and Albus trek down the path, and he shivered because he knew it meant Buckbeak’s death and he mourned for Hagrid.
And sure enough, the three friends reappeared onto the Map ... except ... there were now four of them. Remus stared intently. A fourth dot, close to Ron, was with them. What he saw made his heart stop.
This can’t be true. The Map must be lying.
He rubbed at his eyes.
It can’t lie.
“Bloody hell!”
This couldn’t be the case ... but the Map, it did not ... no ... could not be wrong. In shock, Remus watched as another dot loomed towards the four of them and appeared to land on Ron and ... Peter Pettigrew.
“Sirius!” he yelled. “Oh, sweet Merlin, Padfoot. Don’t!”
Swiftly, Remus rushed from the room. He ran faster than he could ever remember running from his office and down the path to the Whomping Willow. The tree was waving its branches furiously; Remus knew this was because of the previous intruders.
“Immoblius!” he called and the tree stilled its branches.
It had been years since he’d been in this tunnel. Years since Madam Pomfrey had led him, for the last time, to the hell of the Shrieking Shack. Of course, his last two years here had not been hell. His friends had been there and he hadn’t had to suffer alone with a mind that wasn’t his own. Crouching low, he hurried along towards the Shack, his thoughts racing ahead of him.
He’s dead, we all saw ... and yet ... A sudden memory of Peter hiding a magazine behind his back and assuming an innocent expression when Professor McGonagall had asked what was distracting him. She’d paused and then carried on “ believing him ... and after that the others had relied on that vacant air that he could portray so well.
Sirius and Peter, he thought. Padfoot and Wormtail “ both alive. Oh, bloody hell, was I wrong?
The tunnel path twisted sharply. Ahead he could see the opening that led into the Shack.
Was she right?
He burst, finally, into the room, and cried out a disarming spell to his friend’s son, as Remus took in the scene. Ron, white-faced was lying on the old four-poster bed, his leg mangled by either Padfoot or the tree. Harry shot a look of fury at Remus, and Hermione looked horrified, but now was not the time to placate them.
Remus looked at the one person he’d wanted to see in twelve years. Before tonight, he’d wanted to ask ‘why’ but now he just wanted to know ‘how’. For there was his friend, his comrade “ the boy who’d never made him feel as if he were worthless. For whilst James had always tried to laugh and joke him out of his moods, and Peter had always sympathised, it had been Sirius who had sat with him, often not talking, but just being there in the hospital wing when he’d been suffering. Primarily James friend, James twin “ even, but Sirius “ Padfoot “ had been Remus’ friend too, and his source of support.
He shook his head, trying to make sense of his muddled thoughts.
Peter was here in the Shack. He was Wormtail and was not dead as had been believed. So ... if Peter was not dead ... then Sirius had not killed him.
“Where is he, Sirius?” **
Sirius pointed to Ron.
Remus could hear himself talking, muttering his thoughts aloud, and never taking his eyes off the pitifully gaunt face of his former friend. They switched. Of course!
So many things he needed to say, but really, the most important was that standing in front of him was his friend ... and he should never have doubted his loyalty. Little caring what Harry thought, he walked over to Sirius and hugged him tight. He felt the very bones of the man and could have wept.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I should have known.”
***
He felt rather than saw the moonlight and then Remus knew it was too late. He’d thought he’d be back in time to take the Wolfsbane, little realising that it was already moonrise. If Snape hadn’t appeared and if Ron hadn’t broken his leg, then he would have been in time to take the final dose. If Buckbeak hadn’t been executed today, then Harry would not have been out in the grounds. So many ifs. So many possibilities and paths they could have taken, but in the end, it came down to one thing: he’d not drunk his Potion tonight and now he was transforming.
Remus went rigid and then began to shake, his eyes transfixed on the moonlight. He could feel his limbs lengthening, the pain ripping into his gut. “NO!” he tried to scream, trying hard to hold back the wolf inside, but it was futile, and instead of words, he let out a howl.
Padfoot snarled as he pinned him to the ground. Remus wanted to tell his friend that it wasn’t the same because the Wolfsbane had left him with some semblance of himself, but as Padfoot held him down, the wolf emerged. They bit and clawed at each other. The two of them used to be evenly matched, but Sirius was weak from twelve years in Azkaban.
Remus heard the bang of a curse and Hermione scream. Incensed by the scent of human blood, the wolf needed to attack, but Remus with monumental effort wrenched his mind into focus. He swiped at Padfoot and pounded off into the Forbidden Forest, putting safe distance between them all.
He could do nothing until sunrise.
***
The first rays of the morning sun hit him in the Shrieking Shack. Some instinct had forced him here, and he thanked Merlin that the Wolfsbane he’d taken on the previous nights had somehow kept a remnant of his mind intact. It was never quite as painful transforming back into a man again, but he still shuddered as his limbs contracted. A breeze fluttering through a broken window reminded him that he was naked. Blearily, he looked around and then smiled-- Severus had left the Cloak by the door.
Swinging the Cloak over his shoulders, he suddenly laughed. “He’s INNOCENT!” he shouted joyously to the empty room. “Sirius Black is a free man.”
Buoyed up with hope and utter joy, he ran along the tunnel to the Whomping Willow entrance. Everything was going to be better now, Sirius was innocent and ... Merlin, he could not wait to see Tonks’ face. He hoped she would shout ‘I told you so’ from the roof of the Ministry building, and smile that wonderful, wide, heartbreaking smile. He wondered where Sirius was now, perhaps in the hospital wing, or maybe Albus had let him sleep in Remus’ quarters. Perhaps he’d invite her today to meet him again, if Sirius was ready.
He pressed at the knot in the side of the tree and waited for the branches to stop. He heaved himself through the tree roots and scanned the grass in front of him. He’d dropped his wand last night. He remembered that much ... and Peter ... dear God - Remus clenched his fists - Peter had transformed and run off. In the grass, he saw his wand, but as he bent to pick it up, he noticed a trail of blood leading from the tree to the lake.
“Merlin,” he muttered in horror, “did I bite someone? Surely I’d remember?”
But the events were unclear in his mind. He had snapshots flashing through his brain. Padfoot holding him down, his wand spinning in the air, Hermione screaming ... Hermione screaming. He began to shake. What if he’d killed her, or worse, turned that brilliant girl into a savage like him?
***
He sprinted back to the castle and up the stairs to the Hospital wing. The door was locked but from outside he could hear the voices of Harry, Ron and -- thank Merlin --Hermione. They were laughing and he felt relief wash over him. He hadn’t harmed them.
But he could have.
Back in his quarters after checking to see if Sirius was there, he washed and clothed himself with a leaden heart. He looked around his rooms and sighed as he remembered the chats with Harry, the extra Patronus lessons, tea by the fireside with Charity and feathers cascading over a laughing girl. It was all a blur of happy memories that would not be repeated.
Remus walked quickly to Albus’ office. There was little point delaying this, but still he hesitated as he lifted his hand to knock on the door.
“Enter,” commanded Albus. Remus walked in to see his mentor and friend looking at him with the utmost sincerity and a hint of sadness.
“Where’s Sirius?” Remus asked as he sat down.
Albus sighed and then began to explain the night’s events. He listened in silence, only uttering the occasional exclamation when Albus talked about the Dementors trying to administer the Kiss, and then Harry’s Patronus charging down the pack.
“You taught him well, Remus,” Albus said and then he placed his hands together fingertip “to-fingertip and waited for Remus to speak.
“I should have told you he was an Animagus, I know,” Remus said at last. “I have let you down, Headmaster.”
“I am not at all sure what difference it would have made to last night’s events, Remus,” Albus replied, “although if Sirius had told me everything from the start, then he would not have been imprisoned.” Remus looked up startled. “I visited him in Azkaban several times during that first year “ but he would not speak to me. I believe the shock of James’ death and Peter’s betrayal drove everything from his mind, and he believed it was his fault.”
“I tried to see him,” Remus stated bleakly, “but the Ministry wouldn’t give me a pass. He might have talked to me.” He paused. “Headmaster ... Albus ... I’ve come here to hand in my resignation. After last night I cannot stay.”
Albus leant forwards. “Remus, I do not wish you to leave, and you have my unquestioning support.” He paused. “You are an exceptional teacher.”
“But I can’t stay ... not now,” Remus replied. He noticed that Albus had not demurred. And then he voiced his deepest fear. “This morning, when I ...” he coughed “... became human again, I could remember Hermione screaming. I was terrified that I’d maimed or killed someone. I can’t afford for that to happen again.” Albus opened his mouth to speak, but Remus raised a hand. “I know the circumstances last night were unusual, but I think it proved that when I’m near the people I most want to protect, my reason flies out of the window.”
“I would have fought for you,” Albus said at last.
Remus stood up. “I would not have let you, Albus. I’m not that important.”
***
As he wandered down the stairs, looking around the corridors, wondering whether to take a last look at the grounds before he started packing, Remus heard the sound of a woman arguing. It was Charity.
“How could you?” she yelled at the stern figure of Severus Snape. “You know what will happen to him. He’ll be sacked at the very least.”
“That is not my concern,” Severus replied coldly. He turned away from her, but as he did so he saw Remus approaching. Charity looked up.
“Remus,” she said. “I “I’m so sorry. Look, if there’s anything I can do.”
Remus walked down the stairs and looked into her eyes. “What is the matter, Charity?”
She swallowed. “H-he’s told them ... told them all what you are, Remus.” She took his hand in hers. “Dumbledore won’t sack you, I’m sure.”
Remus smiled ruefully and squeezed her hand. Then he looked at Severus. “There really was no need to tell them all, Severus. I know my position here is untenable, so I’ve handed in my resignation.” He released his hand from Charity’s and held it out to him. “Thank you for the Wolfsbane.”
But Snape refused his hand and walked towards the dungeons.
“Why did you do that?” Charity asked in exasperation. “He’s ruined you, Remus. You could have stayed here if it wasn’t for him telling the Slytherins that you’re a werewolf.” She tried not to gag on the word and Remus was reminded painfully of Ron Weasley’s revulsion the night before.
“Oh, Charity,” he said sighing. “It would have come out sooner or later. This way I can leave without my students fearing me.”
She sniffed loudly and he suspected she was holding back tears. “What will you do?”
“I don’t know,” he replied. “Perhaps I’ll return to Romania for a while. I was happy there.” He paused. “But first I have to speak to someone in London.”
***
It had been, thought Tonks, a particularly bloody awful week.
Her final Auror exams may have been over, but she’d been distracted by the case of Hagrid’s Hippogriff. Charlie had been pestering her for news and she’d been loath to tell him the date of execution.
“Sorry, Charlie,” she muttered. “There wasn’t a bloody thing I could do about it.”
She could hear Proudfoot talking to Dawlish in the corner.
“It isn’t funny, Jacob,” Dawlish was saying. “The Minister was very upset that the beast escaped. It had hurt Lucius Malfoy’s son after all.”
“So what,” laughed Proudfoot. “We all know Fudge is a tosser. I just think it’s funny that the animal escaped right under his nose.”
Tonks looked up. “What was that?”
Both men glanced at her, and then Proudfoot spoke, “Hagrid’s Hippogriff, Nymphadora. It escaped last night and no one knows how.” He laughed. “They should ask that sodding werewolf a few questions. He probably killed it and shared it with Black.”
She stood up. “W-what are you talking about?”
“He’s talking about me,” said a voice from the doorway. Tonks whipped her head around. She recognised the speaker, but still felt a start of surprise shoot though her heart. Remus was walking into the room. He stopped in front of Tonks’ desk. “May I take you out for a late lunch? I need to talk to you, and ...” He paused, looked directly at Proudfoot and with a wink continued, “I need to eat far more than a Hippogriff to keep my strength up.”
Tonks stood up. “You don’t have to,” she whispered. “I’m quite prepared for the worst about him, now. I don’t need lunch to sugar coat the news.”
Remus smiled. “You won’t need any sugar,” he murmured as he led her through the door.
In the end, because it was a hot day, he bought them both some sandwiches and they walked to Hyde Park. Sitting by the Serpentine, he watched in amusement as she took off her shoes and dangled her feet in the water.
“Are you going to tell me what this is about?” she said at last. “I know Sirius was at Hogwarts last night. And I take it he hasn’t been caught, or we’d have been told.”
Remus grinned. “You’re right,” he replied. “You’re always right, Nymphadora.” He ducked to avoid the blow she aimed at his head. “Your reckless, brave and foolhardy cousin escaped on Buckbeak last night.” He laughed. “I don’t know all the details... but I do know this. Sirius is innocent, Tonks.”
“Wh-what?” she stuttered. “Remus, if this is a joke, it’s not bloody funny.” Her eyes flashed and she stood up. Remus grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the grass. She fell awkwardly into him, and he winced as the ravages of the night before began to flare up.
“I’m not joking. Sirius didn’t betray them, Tonks. He didn’t kill Peter ... or those twelve Muggles. He wasn’t a traitor, and--” He looked down at her hand, noting a small scar on her finger. “The rat that bit you ... was it Scabbers?”
Puzzled, she nodded. “What does that have to do with anything?”
Remus gazed at the perfect, cloudless sky. “I should have known. You told me you couldn’t hide this scar, didn’t you?” She nodded. “Scabbers wasn’t an ordinary rat. He was an Animagus.” He paused and saw her eyes widen.
“Who was he?” she whispered, and he could hear hope breaking into her voice.
“Scabbers was Peter Pettigrew. And it was Peter who betrayed the Potters. He blasted twelve Muggles to their deaths, cursed off his finger and then transformed into a rat. ”He stopped and began to laugh. “They became Animagi in my fifth year. Peter was a rat “ Wormtail; James was a stag “ Prongs; and Sirius...”
“He was a dog!” she shouted and then laughed as the people around them glared. She grinned and lowered her voice. “A big black dog, wasn’t he?”
Remus nodded.”You knew, didn’t you? You asked me the question about nicknames and I didn’t think you were convinced at the time. Had he told you?”
“No,” Tonks replied. “I saw him -- that day I staked out his old flat with Mad-Eye -- I saw a dog. He had huge feet, but walked so stealthily ...” Her laughter bubbled over and her eyes sparkled as the news sank in. Her hair seemed to brighten although he knew she was keeping it under control. “Where is he?” she breathed.
Remus gazed at her, at the happiness that was seeping back into her face. Her spirit, which he’d thought wounded, was healing and although he marvelled at her joy, there was a part of him “ a small petty-minded part “ that disliked the fact that it was Sirius and not he who had brought her back to life.
“I don’t know,” he started to say, but was cut off as she flung her arms around him. The force sent him sprawling and together they rolled down the bank, landing in the river.
“He’s innocent,” she shouted to the sky as the water splashed around them.
Sitting in the shallows of the Serpentine, Remus laughed at her utter joy. She turned her face towards his and leant forward as if to kiss him. And he wanted to kiss her “ Merlin he wanted to “ but as she squeezed his arm, her hand caused a spasm of pain to rack though his body. He winced and she dropped her hand.
“Sorry,” she said gruffly and started to move towards the bank.
Remus closed his eyes trying to banish the memory of Tonks, four years ago, applying salve to his wounds. He was wrong for her then and wrong for her now. Last night proved he was a danger and he would not ruin her life.
End Notes:
So sorry for the delay. I was having trouble with this chapter, so would appreciate any reviews. Then I got bogged down with life and nano.
Chapter 16 - Old Dogs and New Tricks by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you very much to Ari (Royari) and Kara (Karaley Dargen) for beta'ing this chapter for me. Thanks to Terri for an AIM chat that inspired the APE room and Russia for naming the pub. Warning: Sirius' language is the reason for the Strong Profanity warning. Finally, I'm sorry this chapter has been so long in the writing.
Sirius Black trotted through the streets of London, sniffing at corners and helping himself to discarded, half-eaten burgers from rubbish bins. Every once in a while, he’d stop and lift his nose in, inhaling the air. Whilst not fresh like the Hogwarts countryside, at least smelt human. Sirius had always loved the smell of Muggle cars and motorbikes even though they polluted the air. He looked about him, wondering if he’d spot anything familiar to guide him onwards, but there was nothing yet.
I should be able to remember, he thought angrily. I’ve been here before, surely.
A brief memory flashed into his head, of his sleeping off a particularly rough night at Remus’ flat. He’d woken naked on the sofa, except for a feather boa around his neck, to see Lily and James emerging from the fireplace. James had thrown a cushion at him, imploring him to make himself decent in front of his girlfriend. Lily had simply giggled and declared that the feather boa looked far more fetching on Sirius than it had on the girl.
Who had the girl been? M- It began with an ‘M’, he thought. He shook his head. Thinking about girls was not going to help him find his way to Remus. Perhaps I only went there when I was drunk, he thought.
He wandered up another litter-strewn street, noticing that the Muggles gave him a wide berth. He was, he supposed, quite a scary-looking dog. Imposingly big, but then to control a werewolf he’d needed to be. He looked up at the sky, seeing the sun dipping down below the roofs. It would soon be night and he’d have to get back to the Hippogriff before daybreak.
Which one of these Merlin-forsaken streets do you live in, Remus?
He remembered steps leading down to a front door “ more specifically, he remembered falling down them and accusing a laughing Remus of pushing him. But he couldn’t recall the name of the street.
He screamed in frustration, his voice barking through the air, and a Muggle woman broke into a run, clutching her son to her.
“Come away, Danny. Don’t upset the doggie,” Sirius heard her say fearfully.
He felt ashamed for scaring the boy like that and wanted to trot up to them, but the fear in her eyes kept him at bay. He slunk up to the wall and looked away.
“Hello, boy, are you looking for a home?” Sirius felt a hand on his head, stroking his ears. He looked up to see the battered face of his friend grinning at him. “I recognised your bark, Padfoot,” he murmured. “After all these years, it’s still unmistakeable.” He stood up. “Come on, I live opposite.”
Inside the flat, once the door was securely locked “ and double bolted “ Padfoot became Sirius Black.
Two nights ago, when he’d seen his friend, Remus had been shocked at what he saw. But at the time, he’d been so buoyed up by the realisation that Sirius was innocent, that he’d cast it to the back of his mind. Now, gazing across at the wreck of the man who stood before him, he found it hard to keep the shock from his face. He turned away.
“I expect you’re hungry, Sirius,” he said lightly. “You’re in luck; I’ve just been shopping. He stepped across to his kitchen and took out a pan. “Eggs, bacon, sausages “ will that do?”
Sirius jerked his head, seemingly unable to speak. He was staring warily at the walls and the fireplace.
“I’m not connected to the Floo Network,” Remus said quietly. “Don’t worry; they won’t find you here. After all, who wants to visit a werewolf?”
A brief smile flashed across Sirius’ face, reminding Remus, temporarily, of the teenager he’d been. But all too soon, the smile was gone, and Sirius’ face returned to the gaunt, unmistakably hollow look of a man from Azkaban.
“I won’t stay,” he rasped, his first words since entering the flat. “They’re bound to turn up sooner or later.”
Remus turned the sausages over and cracked some eggs into the frying pan. “You could always stay here as Padfoot. You’d be safe, at least.”
Sirius looked again at the walls and the bolts on the door. “I...I... can’t, Remus.”
Remus served up two plates of food and a plate of bread, and poured out two large mugs of tea. Adding sugar (Sirius had always had a sweet tooth), he sat at his small table and gestured for Sirius to do the same.
Gingerly, Sirius sat on the chair and gazed at the plate of food. He picked up a fork and held it up to his eyes. “Cutlery,” he murmured, and his voice cracked.
Remus stared at this shell of his old friend opposite, and then leant over. Picking up two slices of bread, he forked his own food in-between them and bit into it.
“Sandwich, Padfoot? Saves on the washing up.”
Sirius smiled gratefully and, carefully placing the fork back down on the table, he wrapped his food in some bread and tucked in. Egg dripped onto his chin, and Remus thought again about the teenage Sirius. Meticulous about his appearance, he would have wiped it off onto a napkin immediately. The grown-up Sirius hadn’t noticed, so great was his hunger. He picked up the tea and took a gulp, but it was hot and he spluttered it out over the table, knocking the mug over.
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he uttered. Using the tattered sleeve of his robe, he tried to mop up the spill. “I can’t do this.”
Remus picked up his wand and waved it casually at the tea dripping onto the floor. “Tergeo!” he said softly. “Sirius, it doesn’t matter.”
There was a long silence as Sirius stared at his friend. Remus noticed a small spark still lit in the grey eyes as he finally began to speak. “I need a wand, Remus.”
“Well, strolling into Ollivander’s might be a bit tricky at the moment. A rather unflattering photograph of you is festooned on every available wall space.” He swigged at his own tea, noting with pleasure that Sirius was listening to him with something approaching amusement. “I’ll talk to Albus.” He paused. “How did you know I’d be here and not at Hogwarts?”
“Prophet, ” Sirius answered roughly. “I found a copy in Godric’s Hollow. The front page was all about me, but you made a splash on page three. Werewolves at Hogwarts, whatever next? They’ll be letting Death Eaters teach Potions.”
Remus ignored the joke. “You went to Godric’s Hollow?” he asked seriously.
Sirius stared at his plate of food and then pushed it away. “I had to see it again. Somewhere in my brain, even after all these years, I can’t believe he’s gone ... that they’re gone... and ...” He stopped and wiped his hand over his eyes. Remus was silent, shocked at the tears running down Sirius’ face. “That bastard rat!”
Remus stood up. Walking over to a cupboard, he pulled out a half-full bottle of Firewhisky, a Christmas gift from Filius. He poured two large measures, and then pressed one glass into Sirius’ hand. “To James and Lily, a match made at Hogwarts now living in Heaven,” he declared.
Sirius sniffed, a laugh caught in his throat and he stifled a sob. “To Prongs and Evans “ no doubt still yelling after all these years.”
They swallowed the liquid in unison. Remus sat on his sofa and gestured for Sirius to join him but, instead, Sirius hunched himself into a corner on the floor. “Tell me about Harry,” he said at last, as he swirled the Firewhisky around in the tumbler.
Remus chuckled. “Where shall I begin? You’ve seen him. Brave, foolhardy, reckless and loyal “ just like his dad.”
“Lily’s eyes, Remus. He always had Lily’s eyes.”
“Yes,” Remus replied a touch wistfully, “and he’s got her courage and strong sense of ... I don’t know... I want to say duty but that makes them both sound rather stuffy and boring.”
“Fair play? Honour?” Sirius queried.
Remus shrugged. “Perhaps. He’s ... kind, Sirius. I think that’s what I mean.”
Sirius stared at him from the corner, and then stood up. Shakily, he poured himself more Firewhisky and then slunk back down.
“Do you want to stay here for the night?” asked Remus. “You can have my bed. I’ll take the sofa.”
Sirius shook his head. “I...I... can’t,” he repeated.
“Why?” Remus asked.
“Walls, Remus. Too many fucking walls, and locks on the doors,” he spat. “I’m choking on all this ... normality. Cutlery! I mean for fuck’s sake, you have cutlery and glasses and china plates.” He put down his glass and, clutching his head in his arms, he began rocking forwards and backwards.
Remus got to his feet, not quite sure what to do. Sensing that the merest contact could tip Sirius into hysteria, he crouched down beside him. “Padfoot, you’re safe. You won’t be going back to Azkaban “ not now.”
“I still hear them. There are no Dementors near me, but the voices won’t stop in my head. My mum shouting, my dad cursing, Reg crying, and Peter damning Prongs to death.” He looked straight at Remus, his matted hair a string curtain across his face. “Do you know what’s worse? Do you know what memory gets dredged up in the middle of the night when I’m asleep?”
Remus shook his head.
“My own voice: ‘Choose Peter as Secret-Keeper, Prongs. No one will suspect.’ He didn’t want to, you know. He wanted me and me only. Lily saw the sense in the exchange, but she wanted to use you instead of Peter. But I persuaded them. I wore them down.” He looked at the ceiling. “I killed them.”
“Lily-” Remus stopped. Now was not the time to talk of Lily, but he felt heartened, after all these years that she, at least, had never thought he was the traitor. “You didn’t, Padfoot. At least, you’re no guiltier than the rest of us. Perhaps if we’d talked over tea like Lily suggested, instead of getting drunk after missions, we’d have trusted each other.”
Sirius stopped rocking and started snorting. “Pink feather boa,” he said at last. “I remember wearing one when I was here once, and not much else. Lily said it looked better on me than on the girl.” He looked at Remus. “I think her name began with M... oh!” His eyes lit up with an unexpected happy memory. “Martha!”
Remus chuckled. “She’ll be pleased you remember her, but not happy you’ve mixed her up. The witch whose feather boa you purloined was Marlene MacKinnon.”
“Oh.” Sirius eyes went dull again. “She’s dead, isn’t she?”
Remus nodded. Silence descended on the room once more as both men sipped at their drinks. Remus drained his glass, silently toasting Marlene McKinnon and her family who’d been killed violently, pointlessly because she couldn’t give information on the Potters.
“Pink hair,” mumbled Sirius.
“What?”
“Someone had pink hair. On the back of my Harley. Can’t remember... but she...” He banged his fist against his forehead in frustration. “I liked her,” he said uncertainly, “but she wasn’t a girlfriend, was she?”
“Meda’s daughter, Padfoot. Nymphadora Tonks.”
“Alive?”
Remus laughed. “Yes, very much so.”
“Nymphadora,” Sirius scoffed. “Bloody ridiculous name.”
“She agrees with you, and becomes quite violent when called by her first name.” He smiled ruefully. “She prefers Tonks.”
“You know her?” Sirius gazed at him, his interest sparked.
“You could say that,” Remus remarked dryly, remembering the Veritaserum. “It seems she knew more from one afternoon’s meeting than the rest of us put together.”
“Knew what?” Sirius was curious.
“Knew you’d never betray your friends. Your little pink-haired cousin has been trying to bust you out of Azkaban for years, Sirius. She’s carried around the memory of that afternoon in her head and heart. Plaguing everyone who knew you with questions, determined to set things right.” He smiled warmly at his friend and leant his back against the wall. “She can’t wait to see you.”
Sirius took a last long gulp of his Firewhisky and stared at Remus. “I need to go,” he said vaguely. “The Hippogriff will need feeding.”
Remus frowned. “I’ll come with you.”
Sirius shook his head. “No, it’s not safe. They’re probably watching your house in case I turn up.”
“The Ministry aren’t going to care about me walking my dog,” replied Remus reasonably. “Or we could go when it’s darker.” He could feel Sirius’ restlessness permeating the atmosphere. “Stay a bit longer. Let me contact Tonks.”
“No!” Sirius yelped. He started pacing the room and shivering, although it was a warm evening.
“Padfoot, what’s wrong?”
“Can’t see anyone. Can’t meet her. Not now,” he implored, clutching at Remus’ arm. “Not yet.”
Remus lifted his hand and placed it on Sirius’ shoulder. “Okay, just you and me then.” He saw Sirius close his eyes and some of the tension leave his face. “She adores you.”
The tension returned. Sirius pushed Remus away. “I can’t see her. Not like this. Look at me.”
Remus took a step back and took in the desperate sight. It wasn’t just the matted, dirty hair. It wasn’t the tattered robes, the yellowing teeth, or the sunken hollows in his face. It was the eyes “ haunted beyond recognition. This was not her beloved demi-god of a cousin.
“She won’t care,” he murmured, and he knew it was true.
“But I do,” Sirius replied, sniffing. “I’m not that man any more. I’m damaged.”
“You didn’t mind meeting Harry,” he urged gently.
Sirius laughed bitterly. “I had no choice. I didn’t want to inflict myself on him “ or his friends “ in this state.”
“But you did meet him, and Harry is overjoyed to have his godfather in his life again. Tonks will be the same.”
“It’s different.”
“Why?”
“Because Harry expected a monster. He didn’t know anything about me, except for the bad. She’ll be expecting something else.” Sirius ran his hand over his face. “Not today, Moony.”
“Okay,” agreed Remus. He smiled to himself as he heard Sirius, for the first time, call him by his old nickname. “Not today.” He picked up the bottle of Firewhisky and refilled both glasses. “To Harry James Potter “ a boy to make both parents proud.”
Sirius gazed at Remus. He opened his mouth to reply to the toast but no words would come. Instead, he took a slug of his drink. “I need to go,” he said at last.
“I’ll walk with you,” Remus suggested, but Sirius shook his head.
“No, I’d rather be alone. Besides, you’ll scare the Hippogriff. Send me word if Dumbledore has some ideas about my wand, and I’ll meet you, yeah?”
Before Remus could agree or disagree, Sirius had transformed into Padfoot. Remus sighed and led him to the door. “The Hippogriff, Padfoot,” he said as the dog scratched at the handle desperate to get out, “his name is Buckbeak.” He grinned. “Remember to bow.”
Remus laughed as the black dog gave him a filthy look and raced out into the street. He watched for a while until Sirius had ducked around the corner, and then, closing the door, he settled back on his sofa. He debated contacting Tonks, but knew she’d want to see her cousin immediately, and Remus knew Sirius wasn’t ready to see anyone. He needed time. He needed his memories back.
He pulled out his wand and cast a Patronus.
“Albus,” he intoned, mindful that even private messages could be overheard, “I’ve befriended a black dog. He’s quite loveable for a stray, but wants a stick to play with.”
With a whoosh, his silver lion leapt away to Hogwarts.
He looked around his flat, feeling all at once lonely. It disconcerted him. He’d never minded being by himself. During his school days, he’d frequently left the others to walk in the grounds by himself “ knowing, he supposed, that they’d always be there waiting when he returned. Then, with James and Lily dead, he’d forced himself to live apart, not wanting to think about the friendships that had ended that day. And at Hogwarts, as a teacher, he’d loved the solace of his room. Sometimes he wondered whether it was the fact of his lycanthropy that led him to keep his distance, or whether he’d always been like that. He made a mental note to ask his mum the next time he saw her. So why lonely now? He smiled slightly, for he knew why. Sirius was back and the shards of ice that he’d fortressed around his heart were shattering. The process that had started nearly four years before with Tonks’ visit was now gathering pace with the knowledge that Sirius was innocent.
He picked up the plates and the unused cutlery, cleaned them, and stacked them neatly in his cupboard. Then, pouring himself another Firewhisky, he settled back on the sofa to wait for Albus’ reply.
A hammering at his front door roused him from his reverie. Instantly alert, he cast his eyes around the room, checking for signs that Sirius had been there in case it was the Auror department at his door. Levitating Sirius’ glass from the floor into the sink, he hurried to the door.
It was an Auror, but Remus breathed a relieved sigh when he saw which one it was. Clutching papers in her hand, she was grinning from ear to ear. “Proudfoot looks as sour as a Dirigible plum,” Tonks began as she handed him the papers, “but I’m now a fully-qualified Auror and he can’t do a thing about it.”
Remus glanced down at the papers, noting with pleasure that she’d scored highly not only in Concealment, but in Defence, too. A note had been made of her Corporeal Patronus, commending its clarity. He smiled at her. “My first pupil,” he replied proudly and gestured for her to come inside. “Well done.”
She giggled and followed him over the threshold. “Thank you. Honestly, it’s such a relief, Remus. You wouldn’t believe how badly I’ve been sleeping.” She joined him on the sofa, nearly tripping over the cushion Sirius had left on the floor, and pointed at her Stealth and Tracking result. “That was the one giving me most trouble, but thanks to Padfoot...” She grinned again; then looked straight at Remus. “Have you any news?”
Remus gazed at her, unsure what to say. He looked down at his feet. “I have, actually. He was here this evening.” He saw her face light up with joy and placed a hand over hers. “Tonks, he’s changed.”
“Obviously,” she said scornfully. “I don’t know whether you’ve noticed, but I’m not six years old anymore. Where is he now?”
“I don’t know,” he replied, adding firmly, “I don’t mean older, Tonks. We’re all a lot older.”
“What then?”
He opened his mouth to reply, but at that moment, a silver Phoenix flew into the room. Dumbledore’s Patronus swept through the room, but sensing Remus was not alone, disappeared.
Quickly, Remus cast his Patronus. “Albus, it’s Tonks. You’re free to speak.”
He turned back to Tonks who was looking on in bemusement. “Albus Dumbledore devised this method of communication years ago when we were fighting Voldemort and the Death Eaters. It’s very useful, but does depend on the witch or wizard being able to cast a Patronus. We had one Order member, a rather shady character, who couldn’t cast even a sliver of one.”
“What did you do when you needed to talk to him?” Tonks asked, interested.
“Went to all the bars we could think of. Sirius once devised a game where we’d each pick a pub. Whoever was right had their drinks paid for that night.” He smiled at the memory.
“Please tell me where he is,” she whispered.
Remus closed his eyes. “Tonks, I truly don’t know where he is. But he’s safe, and I fed him, so please try not to worry.”
The silver Phoenix flew in again. “That particular stick, Remus, was confiscated by the Ministry. I believe they are kept under lock and key in the Auror Department.”
Remus watched the Phoenix dissolve and held his breath. Albus knew Tonks was there. He knew that she’d do anything to help. At times Remus felt like cursing the man for the ease in which he manipulated situations.
“What is Professor Dumbledore talking about?” she asked him, narrowing her eyes.
“Sirius’ wand,” Remus muttered, not looking her in the eye.
“Oh!” she exclaimed. “The APE room.”
“Ape?” Remus asked in surprise.
“Auror Prisoner’s Effects,” she explained, laughing. She furrowed her brow in concentration. “I’ve been in there once or twice...” Her voice trailed off; she stood up and began pacing around the room. “Receptionist. Log book, entry ... Mmm, that’s the bugger. Not to mention leaving.”
“Tonks, whatever you’re planning “ stop!” Remus demanded.
“Who me?” she asked, her eyes wide in astonishment, feigning innocence. She grinned wickedly at him. “Come on, Remus, you know why Dumbledore told you where the wand was. He knows I can get it.”
“You can’t do this. You’ve only just qualified,” he protested.
“My nan tells me there’s no such word as ‘can’t’,” she replied cheekily. “You wouldn’t want to disagree with her now, would you, Remus?”
“This is stupid. He can get another wand. He can have mine for Merlin’s sake!” Remus stood up and walked towards her. “You are not to do this, Nymphadora.”
“If you think using that name is going to stop me, then you’re sadly wrong. It’ll only make me do this alone and not include you, Professor Lupin.” She laughed again, exhilarated.
He tried a different tack. “Sirius would not want you risking your career for him.”
“Pfft!” She rolled her eyes at him and stood in the middle of the room, hands on hips, reminding him fleetingly of Lily when James had tried to stop her going on a mission with them. “Sirius would be urging me on. I was his Marauder“in-training.”
“This isn’t a game,” Remus shouted. “Bloody hell, Tonks, if you’re caught it won’t just be the sack. It’ll be Azkaban.”
“I’d better not get caught then, had I?” she murmured and touched him gently on the arm. “And I won’t ... if you help me.”
He gazed intently into her eyes as she implored him. She would go through with this, he knew that. He could walk away, refuse to get involved. Sirius could, after all, get a wand from someone else, but she would not be satisfied and, he suddenly realised with startling clarity, she needed him.
“If we do this,” he murmured. “You’ll need me in that room.”
She smiled slightly, acknowledging his capitulation but not rubbing it in. “I can manage without you,” she said at last. “I was only after a look-out.”
“Tonks, do you have any idea what Sirius’ wand looks like?”
She scowled. “No, but all the wands are labelled. Scrimgeour is adamant that we follow procedure at all times.”
He smiled wryly. “But Sirius wasn’t supposed to escape. He was sentenced to life imprisonment, Tonks. You can’t guarantee that his wand is catalogued perfectly.” He paused. “Besides, you’ll probably send the whole lot skidding to the floor as you trip over your foot.”
“Oy!” Tonks punched him on the shoulder. “I passed Stealth and Tracking.” She grinned at Remus as he pretended to cower from her. “Okay, Professor, what’s the plan?”
“Where’s this room?” he asked, thinking hard.
“Just before the holding cells,” Tonks replied. “When we arrest someone, we confiscate their wand and check it in to the APE room.”
Remus was silent for a while. He leant back on the sofa and sipped absentmindedly at his drink. “So,” he said at last, “we need a reason for getting in there.” He paused. “Are there any jinxes placed on the room, or its contents?”
Tonks took a deep breath. “There are no curses set on the contents. Fudge had them dismantled recently so that the Death Eater wands could be studied by the Unspeakables. But the APE room is Charmed so we can’t Apparate in or out. I can get you an Invisibility Cloak from the Auror Department... or Mad-Eye “ he’s bound to have one. I can’t arrest someone for no reason though.”
Remus grinned, loving the feeling of plotting with her. It was like being at Hogwarts again, like being in the Order. “I told you earlier about an Order member who couldn’t cast a Patronus.” She nodded. “His name is Mundungus Fletcher. He’s no stranger to holding cells, Tonks, and I’m sure he’ll oblige ... given the right inducement.”
“Inducement?”
“Tobacco or drink, probably.”
She laughed. “Where do we find him?”
“It’s Saturday night, I know exactly where he’ll be,” replied Remus with a grimace. “Are you ready to change into a hag again?”
***
The Hunchback’s Hump was a pub that could only be described as sleazy. In the middle of one of the side streets off Knockturn Alley, the oil lamps outside the pub were dirty, giving only a glimmering light. It did not invite customers in; rather it deflected people unless they had nowhere else to go. As Tonks and Remus looked through the windows, she shivered in anticipation.
“Ready?” Remus asked.
She looked at her reflection, the light brown hair falling in wisps on her cheeks, and her skin wrinkled beyond recognition. “Do I look suitably hideous?” she asked under her breath.
Remus studied her. “You look repulsive,” he said truthfully. “Well done.”
“You know how to compliment a girl,” Tonks replied with a grin as she pushed open the door. Unsurprisingly, the Hunchback’s Hump was exceedingly gloomy on the inside. It was dark, dank and dusty; Tonks could feel her shoes sticking to the bare floorboards. “Is he here?”
“Not sure,” Remus murmured. “That could be him over there.”
She followed Remus’ gaze and peered across the bar. Sitting on a rickety stool and slurping a frothing liquid from a dirty looking tankard was a very scruffy man. With unkempt shoulder length hair and droopy eyes staring blearily in front of him, he looked thoroughly disreputable and at home in this setting. Setting down his tankard, he drew a pouch out from his robes and began to stuff some tobacco into a long clay pipe.
“He was an Order member?” Tonks hissed in disbelief.
“He’s very useful,” Remus hissed back, “and unwaveringly loyal to Albus Dumbledore.”
He edged closer to Mundungus. Tonks followed, and soon they were both standing at the bar.
“Hello, ‘Dung,” Remus muttered. “Fancy a bit of work for the Order?”
Mundungus lifted his head from the contemplation of his beer and stared at Remus. Tonks noticed his eyes flickering with an alertness she wouldn’t have expected. “’Lo, Remus. Long time no see. Whatchoo after?”
“We need you to break the law, ‘Dung ... or at least be seen to. This young lady here needs a prisoner “ temporarily.”
Mundungus smirked. “You got shit in yer eyes, Remus? She ain’t young.”
Tonks smiled at him and wrinkled up her nose slightly. It began to change from the hooked, warty protuberance into her normal nose.
“Nice!” he breathed appreciatively. “What you offering?”
Tonks leant forwards. “A blind eye, Mr Fletcher. That ‘baccy you’re smoking isn’t exactly legal, is it?”
He scowled at her. “You arrestin’ me for that? Half the blokes in ‘ere are on this stuff.” He looked around. “And the other half are out of their heads on Firewhisky, so you goin’ to take all of us in?”
Remus pulled up a barstool and gestured to Tonks to do the same. “It’s not a real arrest, ‘Dung. She’ll release you within an hour. You have my word.”
Mundungus held Remus’ gaze and then turned to Tonks. She smiled slightly at him. He grinned back. “Make it an overnight stay, yeah? My landlord chucked me out last week and I don’t fancy another night dossing down on the streets.”
“Deal,” whispered Tonks. “And I’ll even throw in a full English in the morning.”
Remus took Mundungus’ arm and they stood up. Tonks took his other, and the three of them left the bar. As they got to the door, Mundungus turned to Tonks. “Any chance of leaving a bottle of booze in my cell?” he asked and cackled at her.
“Don’t push it, Mr Fletcher,” she replied, but she was smiling.
***
Apparating directly out of Knockturn Alley, Tonks, Remus and Mundungus landed across the road from the Ministry Entrance. Remus pulled out the Invisibility Cloak Tonks had purloined from the Auror Department earlier that night, and covered himself up.
“’Old on!” exclaimed Mundungus. “Whatchoo arrestin’ me for?”
“Smuggling,” replied Tonks, scanning the telephone box entrance. She pulled a large china mug with a moulded face and handle out of her pocket. “This is a suspected dark arts object.”
“What is it?” Mundungus asked dubiously.
“It’s a Toby jug, used for drinking beer,” she explained. “My Nan gives me one every year. Look, I’m going to cast a simple charm on it, and make out that it scares Muggles when they drink out of it.” She peered closer at the face on the tankard. “It’s bloody ugly and probably does, so not much of a lie. I’ll say I found you in possession of it in a Muggle bar, okay?” He nodded and Tonks continued, “In the morning, when the senior Auror comes to interview you, the charm on this will have mysteriously faded, so there’ll be no evidence.”
“Won’t that cause you problems?” Remus asked anxiously from beneath the cloak.
“I’ll be fine,” she replied with confidence. “They’ll put it down to over enthusiasm from the new recruit.”
Mundungus snorted. “Your boss, old Rufus, can’t wait to get me banged up. ‘E’ll probably give you a medal.”
She smiled grimly at him, then returned to watching the street. It was quieter now, with less Muggles around. “Come on, let’s go. Remus, I’m going to take Mundungus in using the telephone box entrance, that way he is registered. You need to Apparate. We’ll meet you by the fountain, yeah?”
She heard a crack and knew he’d gone inside. Binding Mundungus at his hands, she pulled him across to the decrepit phone box.
“Welcome to the Ministry...” a voice stated as she stepped into the booth.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Tonks interrupted. “It’s Auror Tonks, bringing in a suspect.”
The voice through the receiver became less pleasant and more business- like. “Suspect’s name.”
“Mundungus Fletcher,” Tonks replied. Did she imagine a sigh coming from the voice? There was a whirring and clicking sound, and soon, Tonks held a silver badge in her hand, bearing the words ‘Mundungus Fletcher: Suspect.’
She laughed. The badge was tarnished and had obviously been issued many times before. Mundungus started whistling tonelessly as the floor of the telephone box shuddered and sank below the ground. When it stopped, Tonks bundled Mundungus out and strode with him across to the fountain. Feigning indifference, she slowed her pace, her eyes flicking towards the water. She saw a faint ripple beside the witch statue and smiled vaguely in that direction, knowing Remus was there.
It was late evening, but the Atrium was still busy because the majority of wizards and witches were heading home. Tonks heard a swish of robes behind her as she walked against the tide of employees leaving the building. There were advantages to bringing Mundungus in for questioning, not least that people gave them a wide berth because he stank of stale beer.
Getting out of the lift at the second floor, she faltered slightly as she saw Jacob Proudfoot and Edwin Savage leaving the office.
“Didn’t think you were on duty tonight, Tonks,” called Savage.
“I wasn’t,” she replied, muttering in an aside to Mundungus, “Can you struggle a bit?” She turned her head back to the pair of them. “I was out and saw this guy.”
“What’s he in for?” asked Proudfoot, looking Mundungus up and down. “We’re not here to pick up random drunks, Nymphadora.”
She sighed and raised her eyebrows. “I do know that, Proudfoot. I suspect him of Muggle-baiting with a Dark Object.” She pulled out the Toby jug. “It mutters obscenities when you’re drinking and the Muggle thinks someone in the bar has insulted him. Been causing fights all over the East End. ”
Proudfoot laughed. “It’s hardly Dark Magic. Despite Arthur Weasley’s attempts at changing the law, you’ll never get Scrimgeour to authorise a prosecution.”
Tonks glared at him and he shrugged. “Your head, Nymphadora. I’m just giving you a friendly warning.”
“Yeah, ta,” she growled. “And it’s Tonks, all right!”
“Calm down,” whispered a voice behind her. “You don’t want him coming over.”
Tonks pulled a face and then walked Mundungus over to Savage. “Will you put Mr Fletcher in a cell while I check his wand in at the APE room?”
Lumbered unexpectedly with Mundungus, who obligingly began to struggle and sing an obscene song about goblins, Savage sighed but began walking him to the holding cell. Tonks turned on her heel and headed towards a green door opposite the entrance to the cells.
Opening the door, she spoke to the witch at the front desk, explaining slowly why she was there, and began to dither over the forms. Messing the first one up, she smiled sweetly and requested another. The witch smiled thinly but bent down to fetch another.
“Over there,” hissed Tonks, pointing to an aisle on the right, “are where the detainee wands are kept. Three aisles beyond are the Azkaban wands.”
She felt a slight pressure on her arm as he squeezed her reassuringly, and then Remus slipped past the front desk. Tonks took her time filling in the next form, explaining to the bored witch that this was her first solo arrest and she was anxious to get it right. When she’d dithered as much as she dared, she accepted the chit for Mundungus’ wand and walked to the detainees’ aisle, placing the wand in a narrow silver wand box on the third shelf and putting the chit in her robe pocket. Checking that the witch was looking the other way, she scooted towards the Azkaban aisle.
Remus was there; she could see his hands appearing from under the cloak, rummaging through boxes and boxes of wands. She ran towards him. “Any luck?”
“I was right,” he whispered. “The box that should contain Sirius’ wand has been mislabelled. Eight inches, cherry? I don’t think so.”
“What are we looking for?” she asked, frenziedly opening boxes.
“Fourteen and a half inches, oak,” he replied as he resumed his search. He stopped. “Ah-ha. This could be it.”
Taking off the hood of the cloak, Remus held up a wand to his face. Dusty with disuse, he rubbed at it, causing a small spark to emerge and crackle into the still room.
“Everything all right there?” the front desk witch called out.
“Yes, fine,” Tonks replied quickly. “I just dropped something, sorry.”
She turned back to Remus; he was smiling. “We can go,” he declared hoarsely. “This is definitely it.”
Pulling the hood over his head, Remus crept out of the aisle. Tonks followed, but just as she got to the corridor, she stopped sharply. Proudfoot was standing at the desk, blocking the narrow exit and talking to the young witch. She was smiling at him, enjoying the chat. Tonks swallowed, praying that Proudfoot wouldn’t turn at that exact moment. If he saw her at this aisle, he’d become suspicious, but casting a Disillusion Charm would cause spell activity that he’d notice. Trying to think of the best way forward, she was taken by surprise when Remus grabbed her and enveloped her in the cloak.
“We’ll walk very slowly to the detainees’ aisle, Tonks,” he hissed in her ear. “Then you can emerge from there and get out.
“You won’t be able to get past him without bumping into him, and you can’t stay here,” she whispered furiously. “You’ll be discovered, cloak or no cloak.”
“You don’t have a choice. I’ll give you the wand, and think of a cover story as to why I’m here.” He propelled her slowly along the corridor and then into the aisle. She could feel his heartbeat against her hand, steady as anything. Her own heart, she knew, was pounding with adrenaline.
“I have a better idea,” she said, and grabbing his wand, she pointed it at Proudfoot and the witch. Petrificus Totalus! she thought and watched with only a slight twinge of guilt towards the witch as they both sank to the ground.
“What the hell are you doing?” Remus cursed her angrily. “They’ll come running now and find us.”
“Getting you out of here,” she replied and handed him back the wand. “Now, hex me, and then leave.”
“Don’t be so bloody stupid!” he exclaimed. “I can’t hex you.”
“Fine,” she muttered. “We’ll both stay here and get sent to Azkaban.”
“No! I’ll stay here, and you’ll get out with Sirius’ wand.”
Tonks sighed and her shoulders drooped. She took a step towards him. “Okay, have it your way, Remus. Hand over Sirius’ wand.”
He held it out to her, and she stretched out her hand, but instead of taking her cousin’s wand, she snatched Remus’ again and pointed it at herself.
“Don’t you dare, Nymphadora!” Remus moved to grab her wrist but she dodged him and he slipped on the folds of the cloak. She fell on top of him. Her face mere inches from his, she suddenly swooped down and kissed him hard on the mouth, and then, before he had a chance to catch his breath, she cast another non-verbal spell with his wand and collapsed onto the floor.
“Merlin! Merlin! Merlin!” Remus chided her lifeless form. “You always think you know best, don’t you?”
Kneeling on the floor, he dragged her across the floor and left her half out in the aisle. He stood up and started to leave, but looking back, he crouched down again. A strand of her hair (it was blonde that night) had fallen across her face. Slowly, he brushed it to one side with his fingers. Bending his head down, he placed a very soft, very gentle kiss on her lips.
“Just like your reckless cousin. What was the Hat thinking when it Sorted you into Hufflepuff?”
End Notes:
Sorry, sorry, sorry for the long wait. Three months isn't good enough.
Chapter 17 - Interrogation by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you Kara (Karaley Dargen) for beta'ing this chapter for me.
As Remus slunk out of the APE room, past Proudfoot, who was still laid out on the floor, he felt his heart beating faster than it had in a long while. This was like being back at Hogwarts “ not as a Professor, but as a Marauder. He wanted to laugh out loud, but this was far more serious. The consequences if he were caught with a felon’s wand would not be detention with Filch, but a stretch in Azkaban. He knew it was only a matter of time before other Aurors arrived, so he ran along the corridors looking for an empty room where he could collect his thoughts.
Somewhere in his subconscious, he found himself taking a twisting path, along the winding corridors of the Ministry, until at last he came to a small office. Hurriedly, he tried the door “ it wasn’t locked and he knew why: this office and this department were not deemed important by the Ministry.
The Department of Magical Records “ he’d not been here for years. Not since that last day when he’d collected his father’s things because his mother “ as a Muggle “ had been unable to attend. The furniture had long since been rearranged, and where John Lupin’s single desk had been, there were now two tables pushed together. Remus remembered picking up a photograph from the desk of himself and his mother. At the time he’d felt bitter because the picture was old, taken long before he’d been bitten, but now he realised that his father had simply wanted a reminder of happier times.
He wondered briefly, as he looked around, whether his father would approve of his current actions. Deciding that John Lupin would certainly not be amused, Remus smiled grimly and then Apparated out of the Ministry.
***
“One advantage, you see, Padfoot,” he explained later, laughing, “of being a werewolf and also one who until recently had a responsible job as a professor--” He grinned as Sirius raised one eyebrow sardonically. “”is that I’ve undergone so many checks and counter-checks through the Ministry over the years that the various departments have got bored with me.”
They were sitting under a tree in a small park near Remus’ home, leaning back against the trunk and discussing the events of the night before. Sending a message via his Patronus, Remus had thought the open space of this place would be far more agreeable to Sirius than his basement flat.
“And that meant you could Apparate in and out easily?” Sirius replied. He sounded interested, and Remus was heartened that some of his old friend appeared to be returning.
Remus nodded. “Mmm, I have a level of clearance not enjoyed by the average wizard. Of course, now that I’m no longer employed by Dumbledore, and half the Ministry are convinced I either helped you, ate Buckbeak or both, then I doubt I’d have had another chance to rescue ““He paused and reached under his robes. “- this!”
“OH, Merlin!” exclaimed Sirius. “My wand. My actual bloody wand! How did you“? What did you“?”
“Albus knew where they were kept,” Remus explained. He smirked mischievously. “And I had help from a certain witch of our acquaintance who broke possibly every rule in her new Auror’s handbook to help you.”
Sirius looked alarmed. “Auror? Which bloody Auror is going to help me?”
“Your cousin, Nymphadora Tonks,” Remus replied calmly. “I told you about her last time. She’s as sharp as you are, and as feckless. I’d have brought her along, but she’s currently in St Mungo’s, having Stunned herself with my wand rather too enthusiastically.”
Sirius frowned. For a moment, Remus thought he was going to ask some more questions about Tonks but instead he touched the wand to his lips reverentially. “God, I thought they’d destroyed it!”
Remus smiled again, relishing the delight on his friend’s face as he twirled the wand between his fingers. As Sirius laughed, Remus saw the years and Azkaban’s toll temporarily leave his face. “They don’t destroy them, Padfoot. They wanted to study it “ see if they could fathom your evil mind!”
Sirius looked at the wand in awe, turning it over, touching it lovingly, but then he paused. “If they studied it, then surely they knew I hadn’t used it to kill all those Muggles.”
“They thought you’d disarmed Pettigrew and used his,” Remus replied. He shifted around slightly and began to unpack a rucksack. “Food, Padfoot?”
Sirius grabbed at the pasties and hunks of bread and cheese with both hands. Not hungry, Remus watched his friend and then tipped his head back to look at the stars.
“Can’t see your star tonight,” he said conversationally. “Must be in hiding, like you.”
Sirius swallowed some more bread and then, after swigging some water, he grinned. “You never could find it, could you, Moony? You look too high. Sirius is an exceptionally bright star, seen at sunrise and sunset.” His sudden bark of a laugh made Remus start. “I sound like an Astronomy teacher. It’s too late at night to see, and we’re in the wrong place.”
“Huh?”
Sirius resumed eating, but after a while, he started talking again. “My star is best seen in the Southern hemisphere. It likes the hot weather.”
“Like its namesake,” Remus replied, remembering the lazy days spent by the black lake when they’d all swam and enjoyed the summer sun.
“Mmm,” Sirius agreed. “That’s where I’m heading “ somewhere sunny.”
“When?”
Sirius shrugged. “Not sure, yet. I need to lay a false trail for the Ministry, somewhere far away from Hogwarts ... and then I’ll fly off with Buckbeak.”
Helping himself to an apple, Remus took a bite and munched slowly. Swallowing, he turned his gaze back to Sirius. “Padfoot,” he said slowly. Sirius eyed him warily. Remus ploughed on. “Tonks-”
“No!” Sirius replied sharply.
“You don’t know what I’m about to say yet,” Remus protested.
“You want me to meet her.” Sirius sounded sarcastic.
“Yes,” agreed Remus, adding persuasively as he placed his hand on Sirius’ arm. “What’s so wrong with that?” There was silence so he continued. “She’s not a child any more. She’s not going to be scared of you ... or ... repulsed.” Sirius tried to shrug off his hand but he gripped tighter. “She put her job on the line for you last night. You owe her.”
“I didn’t ask her too!” Sirius muttered angrily. He closed his eyes and this time successfully threw off Remus’ hand. “You’ve just told me she risked her job to help me. I won’t let her do that again. If she tries to meet me she could end up in Azkaban “ do you want that to happen?”
“No, of course I don’t,” Remus said vehemently. There was a long, long silence as he thought about Sirius, Tonks and the risk. He sighed. “You’re right, I know you are, but I know she’d say the risk is worthwhile.” He laughed suddenly. “Sirius Black, I do believe you’re showing caution.”
Sirius stared at him, and then looked away. “I’ve dredged my memories, since you told me about her, trying to remember. Merlin knows my mind is a mess after thirteen years of Dementors. And I do remember her “ or bits of her “ pink hair, then red and Lily ... our Lily... adoring her.”
“She’s not that little girl anymore, Padfoot,” Remus said, his voice as soft as the summer night’s breeze.
“I know and that’s what I don’t want to see ... not yet. Does that make any sense, Moony?” He laughed, but Remus could hear something that sounded like a sob at the back of his throat. Sweeping his long straggly hair back from his face, he leant back against the tree and gazed at the stars. “So, I want somewhere warm to fly to. Any ideas?”
“You could try Romania,” Remus said idly, recognising that the subject of Tonks was closed and finally realising why Sirius would not meet her. “It was hot there “ even hotter with the dragons.”
Sirius shook his head. “Too many wizards. I’d be discovered in no time. How long were you there for?”
Remus reached over and took the flask. Swigging at the cool water, he smiled as he remembered Charlie, Catalina and especially Tonks. “About a year. It was good work. Exhausting, but interesting.”
“Will you go back?”
“I don’t know. I’d like to, but there are other things I need to do first,” Remus said. He handed the flask back to Sirius and staring at him, he continued. “I want to find Pettigrew.”
“Pettigrew!” Sirius looked at Remus and laughed loudly. To Remus it sounded like a howl. “How the hell will you do that?”
“You found him!” Remus declared. “You were locked up, yet you still managed.”
“Because he was stupid enough to appear in a photograph, you dim werewolf,” Sirius reposted. He looked at Remus again, his eyes alight with scorn but also interest and looking far more like his old self. “What are you going to do? Search through the whole sewage system of Muggle Britain?”
“No, no, of course not,” Remus muttered. He was unsure why he’d told Sirius of his plans. He knew there was only a slim chance he’d ever find Pettigrew, but ... “I have to try, Padfoot. I have to do something, and finding that bloody rat is the least I can do ... for James, Lily ... and you.” He paused and rubbed his eyes. “He killed them, and nearly broke you.”
“Nearly?” muttered Sirius mirthlessly. “I think he’s done that already.”
“Nothing is irrevocable, Sirius. You’re not dead, and we know the truth now. Harry knows the truth and he’ll be glorying in the fact that he has a godfather.”
He stopped speaking and leant back against the tree, staring at the stars and the waning moon. He heard Sirius take a swig of water and then sigh.
“Was Harry right?” he asked at last
Remus kept his eyes closed. “Right about what?” he asked.
Sirius leant across and tugged on his arm. “Would Prongs have spared him?”
Remus considered. He thought about the brave and loyal friend he knew, the one who had dared all for his friends. The one who’d worked hard to become an Animagus, who’d helped Peter- encouraged Peter. He thought of James Potter “ Chaser, Quidditch Captain and Head Boy. Popular James Potter, who even the teachers indulged. James Potter who had a habit of hexing people when he was annoyed ... or for fun.
“Harry thinks he’s perfect. Most young boys think their dads are heroes, we both know that. Then, when they grow up, hit their teens, they realise that their dads are just normal men “ with flaws. Harry will never know that. But really Harry didn’t want Pettigrew spared; he just didn’t want us to be killers.”
“You haven’t answered the question, Moony,” Sirius urged. “If Pettigrew had sold us out and it had led to our deaths, would Prongs have spared him?”
Remus stared into the silver grey eyes of his friend, and again considered the question. “Peter was a Marauder. If either of us had died, then James would have handed him over to the Dementors “ or at the very least to the Aurors. He would have tried, I think, to understand. But ...” Remus swallowed hard and said harshly, “I don’t think he would ever have forgiven Pettigrew for the death of Lily. He’d have killed him where he grovelled with no thought to his own freedom.”
Sirius swept back his long straggly hair from his face and chewed on the last of the bread. “Where are you going to look first?” he asked, and this time there was no mockery in his voice or in his eyes.
“Janet Pettigrew,” Remus replied promptly. “He was always close to his mum.”
***
After spending one night in St Mungo’s, Tonks returned to work and some intense questioning by Rufus Scrimgeour.
“You say there was no one in the APE room when you entered?”
Tonks looked him directly in the eyes. “No one, except for the front desk clerk. At least I didn’t see or hear anyone.”
“Describe again what happened,” Kingsley said in a kinder tone.
She sighed. She’d already gone through this twice, but having rehearsed in her hospital bed, she knew her story off by heart. “I entered the room, took a chit from the clerk for Fletcher’s wand, and then walked to the third aisle to check it in. I labelled it, and then, just as I was thinking about leaving, I thought I heard a noise.”
“The clerk remembers you saying you’d dropped something,” Kingsley continued. He leant back in his chair studying her carefully. Tonks turned away from his sharp-eyed scrutiny and addressed her testimony to Scrimgeour.
I dropped my wand and it sparked,” she said and grinned sheepishly. “Sir, am I allowed to know if anything has been stolen?”
Scrimgeour pursed his lips; he glanced back at Kingsley who was looking at him enquiringly, and then nodded. Kingsley leant forwards “ his elbows on the table between them.
“We believe someone was in the Azkaban wand aisle,” he admitted. He paused. “We’re not sure exactly what’s missing as the objects have all been mislabelled.” He raised one eyebrow at Tonks and she bit back the urge to giggle.
“Did you see anything, Miss Tonks, anything at all?” Scrimgeour’s voice cut across her thoughts.
She took her time to reply, appearing to mull things over in her head. “I saw Jacob chatting to the clerk, sir.”
“You said you heard a noise,” Kingsley said, staring at her.
Tonks dragged her eyes up to his and nodded. “I’m not sure from where though. It could have been Jacob coming through the door. All I remember is hearing a noise, coming out from the aisle and seeing Jacob and the clerk on the floor. Then something caught me on the side and I went down.” She paused. “Who do you think it was in there?”
Kingsley smiled lopsidedly. “Could be souvenir hunters, Tonks. Snatching a felon’s wand to sell on. Some of them can be quite macabre. Or...” He stopped speaking and leant even further forward. Tonks blinked but didn’t move away; this time she kept eye contact. “It could be Sirius Black.”
She laughed nervously but then, correcting herself, she turned the laugh into a bellow. “Black?” she queried loudly. “I don’t think he’d have bothered with Stunners. Wouldn’t he have just killed us all?”
Kingsley raised one eyebrow. “Excellent point, Tonks. But he could have had an accomplice.” He moved his hand down to the table and began, very slowly, to tap his fingers on the surface.
Tonks smiled to herself; she knew exactly what he was doing. It was an interrogation technique that Mad-Eye had shown her “ lulling the suspect with a monotonous beat and then cranking up the pressure with a sudden question. She was surprised at Kingsley; he must know that she knew the manoeuvre.
“You brought in Mundungus Fletcher,” he began. Tap. Tap. Tap.
Very well, Kingsley, if that’s the way you want to play it, I’ll play along, she thought.
“Yes,” she replied, making her eyes dart to his fingers and back to his face. “I suspected he was in possession of a Dark object “ or at the very least a Muggle-baiting one.”
“It isn’t,” Kingsley commented. Tap. Tap. Tap. “Although it may be that the charm has worn off now.”
Tonks morphed a blush on her face. “Oh, how stupid of me.” She glanced at Scrimgeour. “Sorry, sir. What a waste of everyone’s time.”
He acknowledged her apology with a nod of his head. “I don’t think you were actually on duty that night, were you, Miss Tonks?” he said, sounding faintly indulgent. “And Fletcher is known to the Law Enforcement Department so it’s hardly surprising you wanted to bring him in. He’s a sneak-thief, though, and not a Dark wizard.”
“He was friends with Black,” Kingsley stated mildly, and stared at Tonks.
She jumped. Hell, she didn’t mean for Mundungus to get caught up in this. An overnight stay in a cell and not a stretch in Azkaban was all he’d bargained on.
Tap. Tap.Tap.
Tonks breathed again. Classic technique, and Kingsley was good, she had to give him that. “Edwin Savage locked him up in the cell. He couldn’t have got out.”
Kingsley removed his fingers from the table and pushed his chair right back. “True, true,” he mused. “And that would have been far too neat.” He turned his head around to the Head Auror. “Rufus, we’re not even sure what is missing and until we are, we can’t arrest anyone. Perhaps if the wands were perfectly catalogued, then we could move further forward. But for now, all the evidence points at a mischief-maker caught where they shouldn’t be. I’ll lean on my source at Bourgin and Burkes “ see if anything turns up there.”
Scrimgeour considered Kingsley’s words and nodded decisively. “I’ll leave it in your hands.” Then he shot a glance at Tonks. “Perhaps Nymphadora could take charge of cataloguing the wands.”
Tonks groaned as he swept out of the room. Cataloguing wands sounded like the most boring job in the world.
“Count yourself very lucky, Tonks.” Kingsley’s voice cut across her groans.
“What do you mean?” she demanded, very puzzled at Kingsley’s abrupt change in demeanour.
Kingsley assessed her. There was a long pause, and as he stared, Tonks felt as if he were looking right into her mind. She held his gaze. He walked away. “Personally, I’m wondering why on earth you didn’t turn a blind eye to something as ridiculous as a Toby-jug.”
“D-Dark object,” she spluttered, thinking fast.
“I interviewed the suspect and Fletcher told me he was arrested in The Hunchback’s Hump.” Tonks eyed Kingsley warily. “That’s not a Muggle pub, Nymphadora, so how could he have been Muggle-baiting?”
The automatic response to the use of her hated first name did not spring from her lips as she watched him leave the office. Instead, her mind worked overtime trying to work out why he’d let the matter drop when he obviously didn’t believe her.
Standing up, she walked back to her desk, noticing with a faint pang of guilt that Jacob Proudfoot was still looking despondent after his interview with Kingsley and Scrimgeour. As a more experienced Auror, it had been felt that he should have detected an intruder in the APE room. The fact that he’d been chatting up the pretty clerk had not gone down well with the Head Auror, but Tonks thought Kingsley had smothered a smile when he’d led Jacob into the interrogation room. Catching her eye, Proudfoot smiled lopsidedly at her.
“Have you got a detention as well?” he asked ruefully, his tone friendly for a change.
“Cataloguing the Azkaban wands,” Tonks replied and yawned theatrically. “Can’t think of anything more boring. What about you?”
He groaned. “I have to assist that clerk ... what’s her name ... Malafda? Mallady? - you know the one that works in the whatsit office. She sends all those letters out to underage wizards and witches when they’ve used magic.”
“Malfalda Hopkirk, you mean?” Tonks said, thinking of the wispy haired witch from the Improper Use of Magic Department. Jacob nodded. “She used to send me letters all the time. At least you’ll be detecting spells and things, that’s not boring.”
“Er, no, I’m stuck doing the paperwork for a week,” he complained. He paused and leant back in his chair. “At least it’ll be finished by the time the Quidditch starts. Are you going at all, Nym... I mean, Tonks?”
Keeping the surprise off her face, that Jacob had stopped himself from saying Nymphadora, Tonks replied, “Yeah, my dad got some tickets, so we’ll be at the final “ although we have to arrive three days before. I have tickets for the England game as well.”
“Against Transylvania?” He sounded impressed. “How did you swing that? Are you back with Avery?”
Tonks stopped herself from blushing and said, “I’m friendly with one of the former England players “ Martha Macdonald. I’m joining her in the stand where the former players sit.” She grinned. “It should be a lot of fun.”
***
“I saw Martha two summers ago,” Remus said conversationally the next night. He’d packed a larger bag of food, complete with raw chickens for Buckbeak because Sirius had mentioned that the Hippogryff was eyeing the sheep in the field nearby hungrily. “She was still playing for the Cygnes in Calais.”
Sirius paused as he munched on a slice of cold egg and ham pie. “She played Seeker, didn’t she?” he asked, unsure if his memory of the blonde girl soaring in the air was a real one or not.
“Mmm,” Remus reassured him. “She’s back in England now, plays for the Harpies.”
“Married?”
Remus shook his head, and opening two bottles of Butterbeer, he handed one to Sirius. “She’s become quite friendly with Tonks, you know,” he said slyly.
Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Your conversation has an alarming habit of returning to my cousin’s daughter. Where you always this persistant ... and ... boring, Moony?”
Remus looked away. It was a different place tonight. He’d chosen a run- down area of London that was supposedly being redeveloped, but he’d discovered that the Muggle firm in charge had run out of money and weren’t even employing night watchmen. There were a few tramps sleeping rough, clutching bottles of cheap whisky, and not caring about a couple of equally shabby-looking men.
“Any luck finding Janet Pettigrew?” Sirius asked.
“No. She’s not at the house Peter grew up in, and the forwarding address the neighbour gave me doesn’t exist.” He stopped talking and frowned as he thought about Janet Pettigrew. “We never knew much about her, did we? I can’t even remember if Peter had any other relations.” He stood up and rubbed his eyes. “I knew about the Potters and the Blacks, I even knew about Lily’s family ... but Janet Pettigrew?”
Sirius closed his eyes. “He had a cousin, I think. A Squib.” He opened his eyes and looked startled. “Merlin, how did I remember that?”
“You can’t remember the cousin’s name, can you?”
Sirius shook his head. “Only that he was a boy, the same age as Peter, but not a Pettigrew. Sorry, not much help, am I?”
“Actually, that’s very helpful ... there’s a Squib register, isn’t there? I can probably track him down from that.”
Sirius got up and began to pack the remaining food up in the bag. “I’m going to get back to Buckbeak. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah.”
“Oh, okay,” Remus replied, surprised Sirius was leaving so quickly. Perhaps the walls of these half-built houses were oppressive to him. “I’ll arrange somewhere else, and send you a message.”
Sirius smiled, and for a moment he looked like the teenage boy at Hogwarts just before he was about to play a prank. “Don’t worry about it. Now I have my wand, I’ll send word to you.”
Remus nodded, and kept lookout as Sirius transformed. Holding the bag in his mouth, Padfoot trotted off past the drunks who were now shouting in their sleep. As he watched the black dog being swallowed up by the darkness, he raised hand in salute. A strange shiver ran through him; he felt as if he were saying goodbye.
***
The work was boring. As Tonks sifted through the Azkaban wands, checking them against a list from Ollivander, she came across the Cherry wand that had been placed in Sirius’ box. Scanning the list, she realised it belonged to Barty Crouch junior. She remembered the stories about him being sent to Azkaban “ with no real proof of his guilt. Her mum had recounted the trial to her once, how she’d sat there and watched as her sister proudly declared her eternal allegiance to Lord Voldemort. But the Crouch boy, who’d still been a teenager, had screamed his innocence. He’d died in Azkaban, Tonks had found out later, and his dad hadn’t wanted to collect his effects. Carefully she studied the wand, wondering the truth about Barty Crouch. There was a ‘D’ by his name “ deceased. The wand would be destroyed in two years time, fifteen after Barty’s death.
She saw Mr Crouch sometimes at work. He would come in to see Rufus Scrimgeour mainly to discuss foreign visits and the need for Aurors to be present. She wondered how he felt about his son being declared a Death Eater “ then remembered, with a start, that her mum had told her Mr Crouch had presided over the trial.
“It was a horrible sight, Nymphadora,” Andromeda whispered. “That poor boy looked so young and screamed for mercy. Old Crouch wouldn’t give way. He could have had someone else try them, but he said it was his duty “ that no one could exempt him.”
“What if they were wrong?” Tonks asked her mum.
Andromeda scoffed. “The Ministry will never admit to being wrong! And anyway, it’s too late for young Barty; he died in Azkaban.”
“Tonks!”
Peering around the aisle, Tonks saw Kingsley walking into the room, searching for her. “Over here,” she called as she placed Barty Crouch’s wand in the correct box.
“How are you doing?” he asked staring at the boxes piled up to her right.
“Not bad, actually,” she replied and indicating a small pile on her left, she told him, “I’ve only got this lot left to sort through. Ollivander’s list was incredibly helpful. She opened the lid of the box in front of her. It was a black, hard looking wand and she felt a shiver run through her as she picked it up. Through narrowed eyes, she studied the list carefully and then with a grimace, continued, “Bellatrix Lestrange “ of course. I should have known.”
Placing it in the correct box, she closed the lid firmly and then “ as an extra precaution “ she locked it with her wand. “If one Black can escape, then I’m sure the other one will follow,” she explained when Kingsley raised one eyebrow.
“Have you found his wand yet?”
Tonks shrugged and turned away from his intense scrutiny. “Not yet. I suppose it could have been taken. I mean, someone was certainly in here.” She yawned. “Merlin, I’m tired. I think I’ll take a break, if that’s all right with you.”
Kingsley nodded. “That’s fine. I was after you anyway. I need you to go through some paperwork for me, whilst I go on surveillance.”
Tonks groaned silently; paperwork was even more boring than cataloguing the wands. But she had to stay on the right side of Kingsley, who she knew was very sharp. “Where are you going on surveillance?”
“Building site in East London,” he replied vaguely. “We had a report from a source. Possible sighting of Black.”
He was still staring ahead, not looking at her, and so Tonks had time to adjust her expression of utter shock and panic to one of intense interest. “And you believe this witness?” she asked, praying her voice didn’t sound shaky.
“He has proved reliable in the past, but less so recently,” Kingsley admitted. “Name of Shunpike.”
“OH!” Tonks exclaimed, a faint note of amusement in her voice. “Stan Shunpike? He’s the conductor on the Knight Bus. In Hufflepuff but two years above me at school.” She laughed. “He’s a bit of a storyteller, Kingsley.”
They walked across the corridor to the Auror office where Kingsley indicated the paperwork on his desk.
“Yes, I’ve read the background to Shunpike, but I should investigate anyway. He reports seeing two men. He thinks one of them was our man.”
“And the other?” Tonks asked, this time unable to disguise the nervous quake in her voice.
“He didn’t see his face, wearing tatty robes and carrying a bag “ that’s all Stan saw. Mind you, all the Muggles in that area are scruffy, so he could well be mistaken.” Kingsley smiled at her. “Still, I need to look into it before that Skeeter woman accuses us of doing nothing.” He started to leave, but then turned his head around to look at her. “Just fill in the forms and file them for me, will you, Tonks? It shouldn’t take you long, and then you can get back to those wands.”
“Thanks,” she muttered sardonically, but waved goodbye to him before she picked up the report from Stan. She read it in alarm. To her eyes, it looked as if Stan really had seen Sirius ... and the man he was with could only be Remus. Hurriedly, she got up and left the room, desperately thinking of ways to get a message to Remus. He, she knew, used a Patronus to send messages, but she hadn’t learnt that form of communication yet. He wasn’t connected to the Floo network, and the red tape involved in the use of a Ministry owl for an unauthorised message would take far too long.
“Oh, hell!” she muttered. “I’ll have to Apparate.”
Finding a dark corner, Tonks turned sharply on the spot, “Remus Lupin’s flat,” she murmured.
But as she spun, she felt a hand grab her. Shrieking with alarm, Tonks looked at the person holding onto her arm with a Kappa-like grip. It was Kingsley.
“Now why would you be going to see Remus Lupin?” he hissed in her ear.
End Notes:
Apologies for the gross delay in this update.
Chapter 18 - Double Bluff by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you very much to Ari (Royari) for beta'ing this chapter.
Tonks couldn’t shake him off, and could not change direction, not now that she’d started her turn. Kingsley held his wand to her side; she couldn’t hex him, even if she wanted to. They landed on the steps leading down to Remus’ basement flat. The uneven ground caused her to stumble, but for once, she wasn’t the only clumsy one. Kingsley tottered and fell forwards, hitting his head on a stone doorstop. He wasn’t unconscious, but was woozy enough to cause her some concern. In horror, Tonks saw his head was bleeding profusely.
“Don’t move,” she whispered. “Kingsley, I’ll get help.”
“Leaving me here, Nymphadora?” he slurred. “Making a run for it?” His hand grabbed at her robe. “I don’t think so.”
She bent down beside him. “No, I’m not going anywhere, but Remus Lupin knows a little about healing. He can help, at least until we get to St. Mungo’s.”
He nodded, and she saw his eyes haze over. Rapidly, she hammered on Remus’ door. “Come on; be in, be in, be in,” she muttered under her breath. Kingsley groaned, and she could hear his breathing becoming shallower. She thumped the door even harder. “REMUS!”
“Yes,” said a voice above her. She looked up to see Remus walking along the road carrying a bag of groceries. He grinned down at her over the railings, not seeing the figure sprawled on the steps.
“Oh, thank Merlin!” she exclaimed.
Hearing the urgency in her voice, Remus peered down and, spotting Kingsley dropped his bag in his hurry to reach the injured man. “What’s happened?” he asked. “Gods, this is Kingsley Shacklebolt. What did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything ... Well, not exactly. He grabbed me as I Apparated. We landed awkwardly on your steps, and he fell forward onto that hideous stone gnome you have there,” she muttered, hating that she sounded defensive. It was her fault. Kingsley wouldn’t be there if she’d been more careful and checked he’d definitely left the building.
She crouched down by Kingsley. His breathing was still laboured, but she could see signs of life in his eyes, and he smiled lopsidedly at her.
“Kingsley,” said Remus clearly. “This is Remus Lupin-”
“I know,” uttered Kingsley softly. “I hitched a ride.” He tried to move, but Remus stopped him.
“Don’t move,” he ordered. “I’ll get you inside my flat and take a look at that head wound.” He turned his head. “Tonks, open up, will you, and clear a space on the sofa. Sorry, Shacklebolt, but I’m not used to guests, and you’ll find my papers all over the place.”
He flashed a look of warning at Tonks, and she hurried in. A sudden lurch in her stomach reminded her that Sirius could well be here - she could have led Kingsley right to him. She ran to the lounge and sighed with relief as she saw no one there. Her eyes flickered to the sofa. There were papers on it, and files, and photographs. Was this what Remus meant? Picking them up, she shoved them underneath the moth-eaten armchair opposite. She turned as she heard the sound of shuffling feet and strode across the room to help Remus with Kingsley. Lowering him onto the sofa, she listened to Remus as he bade her fetch a cold cloth from the bathroom.
“I don’t think anything’s broken,” Remus said to Kingsley, “but I expect you’re going to feel faint from that knock.” He lifted his wand and pointed it at the cut.
Clumsily, Kingsley knocked his hand away. “How can I trust you, Lupin? You were seen with Black.”
“Was I?” Remus replied mildly. He took the wet cloth from Tonks’ shaking hand and began to dab at the cut. “It won’t stop bleeding, unless someone uses a wand. I can do that now, or I can get you to St. Mungo’s, but you must know the longer you leave it, the more blood you’ll lose.” He stared at Kingsley and then sat back. “Or Tonks could do it. Do you trust her?”
Warily, Kingsley switched his scrutiny to Tonks. She sat on the edge of the sofa and pulled out her wand. “I’m not as skilled as Remus, but I’ll have a go “ if you trust me, that is.”
There was a pause, and then Kingsley nodded. She smiled at him and lifted her wand to his temple. Glancing sideways at Remus, who gave her an encouraging smile, she muttered the incantation softly and noted with satisfaction that the cut was becoming less deep and the blood had stopped flowing quite so quickly.
“Very good,” said Remus approvingly. “Can I get you a cup of tea, Kingsley?”
“Tea!” exclaimed Kingsley. He jerked forwards and winced in pain. “Hell! My chest hurts. I think I’ve cracked a rib.”
“Do you want me to Apparate with you to St. Mungo’s?” Tonks asked in concern
“No, I bloody don’t!” Kingsley growled. “I just want to know why you were on your way to see Lupin when you should have been writing up witness reports for me.” He stared at Remus. “You were seen with Black, you know. I have a reliable witness.”
Tonks snorted. ‘Stan Shunpike is not reliable,’ she wanted to say, but a look from Kingsley quelled her.
Remus stood up. “I’ll make that tea,” he said and stepped into his small kitchen. “Sugar? Milk?”
Kingsley scowled, but the effort involved in moving his facial muscles obviously still hurt, and he winced again. Tonks moved a cushion behind his back and started to stand up. Kingsley pulled her back. “You’re not going anywhere. I don’t want you two to have the chance to concoct some story. I want the truth.”
Tonks stared into his fierce, dark brown eyes. She glanced across at Remus, but he was busy searching in his cupboards for tea, mugs and what looked like biscuits. “Oh, you caught me,” Tonks said, sighing. “I was bored and wanted to skive off. I’m bloody sick of cataloguing those wands, and so I thought I’d come and see Remus.” She paused and didn’t have to morph the blush on her face. “He’s ... er ... more than a friend.”
Kingsley narrowed his eyes and looked from her to Remus. “Please, Tonks. Give me some credit.”
She felt a hand on her shoulder, and then a finger giving her cheek a soft caress. “Are you in trouble because of me?” Remus asked, and looked directly at Kingsley. His question, asked in such soft tones, rippled with suggestion.
“I hope not,” she muttered, more to Kingsley than to Remus. She breathed in slowly, feeling her heart slow slightly, as she realised with relief that Remus had picked up on her story.
Remus placed the tea tray down and began to pour three cups of tea. Kingsley lay back against the cushion and studied them both. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked you to come over, Dora.”
She hid her surprise at the use of her pet name that suggested a certain intimacy. Aware that Kingsley was staring at her, she kept her eyes firmly on her teacup.
“You should have told me you were busy,” Remus continued calmly. “Sugar, Kingsley?”
“Answers, Lupin. That’s all I want,” Kingsley said mercilessly. He leant forwards, clutching the side where his rib was cracked, but the pain did not deter him. “I’m not fooled by this charade. You were seen with Black at a building site in London.”
Remus picked up his cup and leant back in his chair. “I was seen, was I?” He sounded amused, as if Kingsley were a particularly endearing child.”
“Someone answering your description,” muttered Tonks.
Kingsley glared at her. “I haven’t quite worked out where you fit into this yet, Tonks, but the coincidence of you or Lupin being on the spot whenever there’s trouble concerning Black has not escaped me.” He paused. “I know it’s his wand missing, you know.”
“I haven’t finished cataloguing yet-” she began, stopping when Kingsley raised his hand.
“Don’t take me for a fool, Nymphadora. Your father will tell you that I’m not easily taken in.”
Her head jerked towards him. “You know my dad?”
“Mmm, I was at school with him ... and your mother.” He stopped and smiled softly at her, then lifted his hand and ruffled her hair. “I met you once before, you know, at your christening.”
As Tonks stared at Kingsley, she became aware that Remus was no longer looking quite so relaxed. He had edged further forward on his chair as if about to spring.
“My christening?” she asked curiously, desperate to keep Kingsley occupied.
“Mmm,” Kingsley agreed. “And whilst there I met a thirteen year old boy and his friend, who’d managed to wangle a day off from school. Your cousin and James Potter were engaging scamps “ even at that age.” He chuckled and, at that moment, produced his wand, aiming it directly at her head. “Don’t try anything, Lupin, or she’ll be hurt.”
In horror, Tonks saw Remus with his wand drawn and aimed directly at Kingsley’s chest.
“I mean it,” Kingsley murmured. “I’m an Auror, Lupin. That’s where my duty lies. If you two are in cahoots, then I have no choice but to bring you in.”
Remus held his gaze.
“Could you really kill, Remus?” hissed Kingsley.
“Yes,” Remus replied softly. “I’ve killed before.”
Kingsley smiled lopsidedly. “But I doubt you’d let yourself be responsible for someone else’s death, would you?”
There was an infinitesimal silence as both men looked each other in the eye, desperate for an advantage. Tonks tried to locate her wand, realising in horror that she’d stowed it in the side pocket of her robes “ the side that was nearest Kingsley. She would not be able to reach it without his noticing.
“Go!” she mouthed to Remus.
He shook his head.
“He won’t hurt me,” she murmured.
“You’re sure about that, are you, Tonks?” Kingsley’s voice was soft but clear.
“Remus, just go!” she screamed.
But he refused to leave. Instead, he lowered his wand and sat back down. “Let her go, Kingsley. She’s completely innocent in all of this.” He held out his hands, fists together. “If you need to bind me, then go ahead. I can’t tell you anything, though.”
“You don’t seem to care that aiding Black means a sentence in Azkaban with the Dementors,” Kingsley remarked. He hadn’t let go of Tonks, still had his wand pointed at her.
“I have the horrors of my life visiting me with monotonous regularity,” Remus replied ironically. “Let her go, now.”
Kingsley released her, but as he did so, his hand swooped under her robe and captured her wand. Clutching two wands in one hand, he picked up his tea and resumed drinking it. “Drink up,” he said “It’s getting cold.”
“Uh ... Kingsley, what’s going on?” Tonks asked. She glanced at Remus, wondering if this was all an elaborate joke, but he seemed as bemused as she was.
“You’re right, Tonks. Shunpike is a very unreliable witness. I doubt his evidence could be taken seriously. However ...” He paused. “However, Scrimgeour might find him credible. You were unwise to meet Black there, Remus.”
“Why aren’t you arresting me?” Remus asked quietly. He sat again, his eyes never leaving Kingsley’s face.
“I told you I’d met you before, Tonks. It was also the first time I met Sirius ... but not the last.” He winked at Remus. “Those two boys weren’t at all interested in a christening, but did enjoy the day off school. At the age of twenty-one, I wasn’t that interested in babies either. You were unusual, Nymphadora, but you were still a baby.” He laughed at her glare and then handed her back her wand. “I overheard the pair of them talking about a friend of theirs ... a dorm mate who was ...” He trailed off.
“A werewolf,” Remus supplied. Then his eyes lit up. “It was you!”
“Me?” asked Kingsley, but his eyes were glinting with amusement.
“Er ... him, what?” put in Tonks. “Would one of you tell me what’s going on?”
Remus turned to her. “It was the beginning of our third year when they went to your christening. Sirius had been allowed to attend; James went along for the ride.” He chuckled. “It happened a lot with that pair. Merlin, I won’t forget that wedding of Lily’s sis--” Tonks coughed and he straightened his face, putting a stop to his reminiscences. “Anyway, they’d recently found out I was a werewolf and were set on inventing something that would ‘cure’ me. They blew up a cauldron or two in our dormitory ... we had a lot of trouble explaining that to McGonagall... Sorry, where was I?”
“I’ll continue, shall I?” Kingsley said, raising his eyebrows.
“Yes, do!” said Tonks impatiently.
“I talked to the boys, and they asked me about werewolves. For all their bravado, Remus, I think they were rather scared, but determined not to desert you. So, I sat with them, and started to tell them all I knew. I’d travelled a bit by then and knew more than was in the standard textbooks.”
“What did you tell them?” Tonks asked.
“I imparted one very useful bit of information. Of course, I thought I was telling them this for their own safety. I had no idea ...” He smiled ruefully. “... but even if I’d known, I’m not sure I would have kept silent.”
“He told them,” interrupted Remus, “that a werewolf won’t attack other animals. I think that’s when the idea began to germinate. You know, I presume, about Sirius ...” He glanced at Tonks. “It’s all right, she knows everything.”
Kingsley nodded. “I didn’t, for a long time, know anything about the four of you. When Sirius was imprisoned, I was abroad and although I had trouble believing that thirteen-year-old boy would betray his best friend, I pushed it to the back of my mind. But ...” He sighed. “When he escaped, and then when his wand disappeared, I started to think more about him. He’d written to me, saying it would be ‘cool’ to have a pen pal abroad, but he always commented on his werewolf friend, and then started asking about Animagi. He said it was for an essay, but he wondered if a werewolf would attack one.”
“And you told him they wouldn’t,” Tonks said and started laughing.
“Actually, I told him I had absolutely no idea, but the theory was interesting.” Kingsley frowned. “I was never reckless, Tonks, you should know that, and encouraging a schoolboy in that sort of enterprise would be dangerous and foolhardy to say the least.
“Anyway, fast forward another twenty years, and Black’s wand is gone. Now my suspicions are bristling. I suspect his cousin’s daughter might be involved, although I really don’t want that to be the case because despite the fact that she can be a pain in the backside and never finishes her paperwork -” Tonks glowered at him. “She is a bloody good Auror and a friend ... I hope. I wondered again about Sirius Black, and in the end I took my suspicions to a higher authority.”
“Scrimgeour?” Tonks asked in alarm.
“Dumbledore,” amended Kingsley with a grin. “I went to see him after the break in. Told him about my Animagus theory, and he told me the rest.”
“So you know he’s innocent, yet you still came here and scared the hell out of me!” yelled Tonks. She picked up a cushion and tried to batter him with it.
“I wanted to scare you!” Kingsley said, laughing as he warded off the blows. He pulled the cushion out of her hands and became more serious. “You were too indiscreet, Tonks. Anyone could have seen you. And what if it had been Scrimgeour “ or even Proudfoot “ who was waiting for you? Anyway, don’t you think I’ve paid for it? A gash to my head and what feels like a broken rib. Remind me not to Side-Along-Apparate with you again.”
“What happens now?” Remus asked. “I take it other people know about Shunpike.”
Kingsley nodded. He finished the rest of his tea, and slowly replaced the cup onto the table. “Shunpike’s description of Sirius was accurate, even down to the robes, and he said he’d had a shave. You, he didn’t see very clearly, but ... well, Remus “”
“I’m not popular at the Ministry,” Remus finished. “There will always be that lurking suspicion, I’m afraid.” He tilted his head towards Tonks; she didn’t miss the gesture.
“What was that for?” she demanded.
“Tonks, what Remus is trying to say is that you’ll be tainted by association. It’s probably best you don’t get involved anymore.”
She stood up, suddenly angry with the pair of them at this fresh conspiracy. “I am involved. You can’t suddenly stop me from doing things. I won’t stand by and let Sirius get captured again.” She faced Remus. “Tell me where he is. I want to see him “ NOW!”
“I can’t,” he replied simply. “I don’t know where he is. Sirius was going to send me a message, but I haven’t heard from him.”
***
In the corner of an old ramshackle barn, Sirius Black sat on a damp hay bale, examining his wand. It felt good to be reunited with it. He could feel his arm tingle when he held it and power surge through him when he cast a spell. He’d never believed Ollivander’s story that the wand chooses the wizard. He’d used James’ wand many a time, sometimes by accident, often in jest, and hadn’t noticed that the magic had weakened. But now ... He thrust his hand out again and delighted in the light dancing in front of him. He had to admit that perhaps the old wandmaker was right. This was his wand; to use another was almost a blasphemy.
It was evening now, and he’d promised Remus he’d meet him again. He should send a message, but something held him back. Remus had kept harping on about that girl, and if Tonks were half as persistent as his memory of her suggested, she wouldn’t be content to stay behind. He didn’t want to see her “ not like this. He told himself he was too ashamed of his wretched state, but in reality, he wasn’t sure he could bear the memories that would flood his mind if he saw her again. She was a link, he thought, to one of his perfect days. A day spent in the company of his friends, when they’d all been happy, when Peter had still been a Marauder. He closed his eyes, trying again to remember the details of that afternoon, but it was a blur, hazy in his mind after thirteen years of mind-altering hell.
She hadn’t liked Peter.
Merlin, where did that come from? He furrowed his brow, desperately trying to dredge the depths of his mind. But the wisp of a thought disappeared again.
Perhaps he could see her. Maybe he needed to see her, so he could fully adjust and make peace with his past.
Grinning, he lifted his wand. He would see her. He laughed out loud.
“Expecto Patronum!”
Nothing happened.
Taken aback, Sirius stared at the wand in his hand, and then at the empty space before him. He knew the spell, and knew how to attach the message before he sent it to Remus, but his Patronus hadn’t appeared.
He determinedly thought of Harry. Harry and Hermione when they flew past Flitwick’s window. That incredible boy “ so like Prongs “ and that girl with her sharp brains. Fixing them in his mind, he tried again.
“Expecto Patronum!”
A sliver of silver emerged, barely enough to last a second. He watched it dissolve in the air. And then he realised; he had no happy memories. There was nothing inside to guard against the depression that dogged him. Black dog! He laughed ironically. His Patronus, his Animagus form “ a huge dark portent of doom. No wonder he’d scared Harry in Magnolia Crescent.
How the hell will I get hold of Moony now? he thought. A sound from the corner “ Buckbeak pawing the ground “ caused him to frown. “Yes, all right. I’m hungry, too, but it’s difficult. I can’t just Apparate to Diagon Alley, you stupid bird.”
Buckbeak clacked his beak disapprovingly, and Sirius grinned slightly. He wasn’t sure what the Hippogriff was most annoyed about “ being called stupid, or being called a bird. “I’ll find you something soon,” he soothed. “It’s just a shame I can’t send you out to hunt.”
Appeased, Buckbeak sank to the floor and began to preen his wings. Sirius watched as he tugged at the feathers. Walking over, he picked one up and twirled it between his fingers.
“I need an owl, don’t I?” he muttered. “That’s the only way I can get a message sent.”
Buckbeak stopped preening and stared at Sirius. Giving him a look etched with irony, the Hippogriff tossed his head upwards. Following the movement, Sirius looked into the roof of the barn. Sitting on a beam was a small owl who was watching them both beadily.
“Oh!” Sirius exclaimed softly. He frowned as he took a closer look. It was a very small owl, possibly a scops, and no good for long distance messages, but ... Remembering something Peter had once told him about owls, he reached out his hand to it and softly clucked his tongue. The bird flew down from the beam and hovered in the air before landing on his arm. “Hmm, are you strong enough to fly to London?” Sirius mused. The owl hooted eagerly. Sirius smiled at it. “That’s good.”
He sat on the hay bale, pulled out a sheet of parchment from his robe pocket and began to write to Remus. “You need to take this,” he said when he’d finished, “to Remus Lupin in London. He can bring you a reply-”
He stopped suddenly. Remus would not be able to send a reply. In all probability, any owl he sent out would be tracked by the Ministry, now that his werewolf status was known to all. This owl would be able to deliver the message, but could not return. He tore up the message and started to write another.
‘Moony, it’s time for me to leave. Don’t try to contact me. I’ll be in touch when I can. Good luck finding the rat.
Padfoot.’
He folded it up and attached it to the owl’s leg. “Wait!” he called as it started to flap its wings. “I need to you take another message. And don’t come back, okay.” The bird looked crestfallen at the loss of its fleeting career. “Don’t worry; I’ll find you a new owner.”
He wrote swiftly now that his mind was made up. Soon he would venture out into the town. Maybe surprise a courting couple, or some revellers enjoying a beer, and then once he was sure he’d been recognised, he’d Apparate back to the barn and fly off with Buckbeak.
Dear Harry, he wrote... He smiled as he thought of a boy who would dare all for his friends.
“Merlin, Prongs, you would be so proud of him,” Sirius muttered as he signed the letter. Attaching it to the owl’s leg, he carried him out of the barn and released him. The bird pirouetted in the air, hooting as it twirled.
“Don’t show off!” Sirius ordered, and laughed as the bird suddenly started to fly faster towards its destination. The night was clear, and he could see stars twinkling above him, shining brightly like the lights in Lily’s eyes.
“I’ll clear my name, Lily,” he vowed. “And when I do, I’ll take care of your son. He won’t lose me as well.”
End Notes:
Sorry (again) for the delay. Methinks I have too many fics to update ... Oh and if you want to know what happened when James and Sirius went to Petunia's wedding, then can I direct you towards 'Veils' by *cough* Equinox Chick.
Chapter 19 - Old Flames by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you so much to Ari (Royari) and Kara (Karaley Dargen) for their fantabulous beta work.
~~~“How could we play so badly?” Tonks complained. She was sitting on a hard bench, next to Martha Macdonald, where they’d just finished watching Transylvania massacre the England team. “Honestly, our Chasers were useless “ and that pathetic excuse for a Seeker! How on earth did he get onto the team?”
Martha shrugged philosophically. “Smith’s young and confident. He impressed at the tryouts and played well for Puddlemere all season.”
“But they could have chosen you!” Tonks said in outrage. “You’re much better than Jeremiah Smith!”
“I’m too old,” Martha murmured under her breath. She turned to Tonks and smiled at her. “The manager didn’t think I’d last the tournament.”
Tonks snorted. “You’d have got us to the semis at least. This is just embarrassing. I mean, Transylvania doesn’t even have a professional league!”
Martha yawned and stretched her arms. “Do you want to grab something to eat? It’s still early.”
Tonks nodded. “I’d like that.” She beamed back at Martha. Tonks hadn’t seen her for ages and, wary of sending an owl, she hadn’t yet told Martha about Sirius. “We have some catching up to do, don’t we?”
Martha winked at her. “Hmm, you’re a bit late for that.” She lowered her voice as the other spectators filed past them. “A certain werewolf of our acquaintance came to see me last week and...” She laughed. “Let’s just say it explains a lot about where Sirius was at night when he was supposed to be meeting up with me.”
“You’ve seen Remus?” Tonks didn’t move.
“He told me you weren’t very happy with him,” Martha whispered.
Tonks pulled a face, about to speak, but there were too many people around to do so. She hadn’t seen Remus since Kingsley had ambushed them at Remus’ flat. Sirius’ letter had arrived whilst she’d still been arguing with Remus, demanding to see her cousin. The fact that Sirius had left the country without seeing her had left her bereft, and she’d Apparated away from Remus’ flat soon after.
“He wouldn’t let me see Sirius,” she muttered bitterly under her breath. “I’ve spent fourteen years waiting for him to be freed, and Remus Lupin decided I couldn’t see him.” She tried to walk forwards, but Martha caught her by the arm.
“He wouldn’t have wanted you to get caught,” she soothed.
“I’m getting really irritated with him assuming he knows what’s best,” Tonks snapped. “I think I had a right to see Sirius.”
Martha looked away and stared at the clear blue sky. “I doubt Sirius will stay away forever, Tonks. He never liked the quiet life, not even when he was sleeping.”
***
It had been a trying day at the Ministry. Remus sat at one of the desks in the Historical Records section, where he was studying one of the dusty tomes he’d selected from the shelves. He hadn’t found any record of Janet Pettigrew’s marriage. Without that, he couldn’t discover her maiden name and would be unable to trace her sister and Peter’s Squib cousin. Remus frowned. He wasn’t even sure he remembered Peter having a cousin. Perhaps Sirius was wrong “ his brain and memory addled by his time in Azkaban.
“Excuse me,” said a woman’s voice behind him. “You’ll have to leave soon; I want to lock up.”
He looked up to see an elderly woman, wearing grey robes, her hair pulled tightly in a bun. He smiled at her.
“It’s Mrs Goodbody, isn’t it?”
“Yes,” she replied, sounding surprised. “Do I know you?”
“I’m John Lupin’s son. You probably don’t remember me, but I used to spend afternoons in this place when my dad brought me to work.”
She gasped. “Little Remus... Of course I remember you, but I haven’t seen you for years. It must be...” She trailed off as both of them remembered the last time they’d met, at his father’s funeral “ a strange affair with guests both magical and Muggle. She reached over and squeezed him on the shoulder. “How is your mother, Remus?”
“She’s happy,” he replied, sighing. “Or at least she’s content, I think. She married again, but I don’t see much of them.” He smiled at the librarian, showing a brightness he didn’t quite feel, and then sighed as he closed the book. “You want to close, you said.”
“I should,” she admitted, “but I could easily stay open for a little while, if you’ve nearly finished.”
Remus yawned and rubbed his eyes. “Not sure where to look now, I’m afraid. I’m trying to trace someone, but I don’t know what her surname was before she married.”
“Try looking under the husband’s name, sometimes things get misreported. What was his name?”
“Er, Pettigrew,” Remus replied.
“Pettigrew!” she exclaimed. “Isn’t that the name of the young man who died duelling that madman, Sirius Black?”
Remus smiled lopsidedly. Mrs Goodbody was wrong on every score, but he couldn’t tell her that. “Yes, Peter Pettigrew was his son. He was a friend of mine, and I’m trying to trace his next of kin.” He paused as he thought up a story. “I have some photographs from our school days, and other keepsakes. I thought his mother might appreciate them “ or his cousin, perhaps. I heard he had a cousin about his age, although I think he was a Squib.”
“Why didn’t you say that in the first place?” Mrs Goodbody beamed at him. “You should look in the Squib register. If he’s there, it will list any magical relatives he has.”
“Wonderful,” Remus breathed. Finally, he was getting somewhere. “Where is it? Can I look now?”
She shook her head. “The Squib register isn’t here anymore. It was moved with all the non-essential records several years ago.”
“Well, where’s that then? Will it still be open?” he asked, showing his impatience.
“All non-essential records were relocated to the library in Godric’s Hollow, Remus.” She glanced at the fob watch on her lapel. “They won’t be open now “ and certainly not tomorrow “ but you could try on Monday.”
He slumped back in his chair. Godric’s Hollow. He hadn’t been there for years. Not since “ Oh, Merlin, Prongs..
Not since the funeral.
“Are you all right, dear?” Mrs Goodbody asked, her voice full of concern. “Only you look a bit peaky.”
Remus sighed as he looked up at her. “I’ve been inside too long, I think.” He closed the book heavily and stood up. “I’ll let you close up now, but thank you so much for all your help.”
Wearily, he stumbled out of the room and into the narrow Ministry corridors. He’d chosen the day of his visit deliberately, knowing that Tonks would be at the England game. He couldn’t face seeing her yet. He was a coward, he knew, but he didn’t know how to tell her that it was Sirius’ reluctance to see her that was keeping them apart. Of course, they both wanted to protect her and shield her from any fallout it if were discovered that Sirius had received help in his escape, but Remus knew she’d say the risk was worthwhile. She needed to see her cousin, and it was tearing at Remus’ soul to see her utter misery at being denied the chance. In the end, though, his loyalty lay with Sirius and not her. For, however much he wanted things to be different, Sirius meant so much more. Remus’ past, his sense of worth and all his good memories were tied to that group of three and to Hogwarts.
Even Lily had been peripheral to their core.
***
Remus left his flat the next afternoon, loath to stay now that he had a lead. With Sirius away for the foreseeable future and Tonks refusing to see him, Remus found the solitude he usually craved to be suffocating. Now that he knew the whereabouts of the register, he itched to be on his way. Feeling the need to do something other than brood, he packed some clothes in a knapsack and, taking one last look at his flat, Apparated away.
It was warm when he arrived in a small field behind the old Potter house. He’d been here many times in the past. During summer holidays, he’d always spent a week with the Potters, joining Sirius and Peter as James’ guests. James’ parents had been elderly, but tolerant hosts. They’d adored their son and, by extension, his friends, whom they’d welcomed time and time again. He remembered their kindness to him, especially when he’d told them about his lycanthropy. Apart from a few of the Professors at school, Halley and Hereward Potter were the only adults he’d met who hadn’t judged him purely on his affliction. They’d been shocked, naturally, and their protective instincts had surfaced in the form of them studying the moon charts for the rest of that week, and attempting to rearrange the sleeping arrangements - until James laughed quite openly, saying they all shared a dorm ‘for Merlin’s sake’.
But when Remus had left, feeling utterly miserable because he knew this would be the last time he’d be invited, Halley had reached out and hugged him tight.
“Come back next year, Remus. Or perhaps you’d like to come for Christmas, too?” she’d said. And Remus had been hard pressed to say whether the tears he’d felt were from her or him.
When Hereward and Halley Potter had died, he had genuinely mourned them. He felt no shame in mourning them still, despite losing other friends whose lives had been cut short far too abruptly.
From what he remembered, there was a boarding house on the main street. Despite the short notice, he hoped he could find a bed for the night, and if not ... Remus sighed. He could always return home; however lonely, it would beat sleeping in the open air for the night.
Margaret Abbot’s Fine Bed and Breakfast looked much smarter than he remembered. Remus assumed that in the thirteen years since he’d last stayed there, she’d seen a dramatic upturn in business. The carpets were plush, the walls were all freshly painted, and the inside smelt fresh, inviting. When he’d been there before, Margaret Abbot had greeted him dressed head to toe in black. The walls had been grimy and the carpets stained; business at the height of Voldemort’s reign had been poor. But now “ he looked around again, taking in the surroundings “ now, business was obviously good.
It hit him suddenly, painfully, that the scene of Voldemort’s ‘death’ must be an attraction for wizards and witches everywhere. Perhaps they truly wanted or needed to pay homage, but the idea still struck him as ghoulish. This was where his friends had died. He wished they could be left in peace.
“I’d like a room,” he murmured to the young girl at the desk.
“How will you be paying, sir?” she whispered. “Cash, cheque, credit card, or ...” She bit her lip.
“Galleons,” he supplied.
She beamed and handed him a heavy key.
“You’ll be at the top of the house. I’ve given you one of the attic rooms,” she said, lowering her voice, “just in case you need to send an owl.”
***
After a deep night’s sleep in a comfortable bed, Remus awoke to the faint sound of birdsong floating through the open window. He opened his eyes, rather hoping to see the tiny Scops owl that had delivered Sirius’ last message. But there was nothing there “ no owl perched on his windowsill “ and the birdsong was merely the persistent chirping of the sparrows. Remus yawned and stretched, then levered himself out of bed. He knew, from talking to Margaret Abbott, that the Godric’s Hollow library wouldn’t open until ten, so he took his time over breakfast and ignored the insistent voice in his head telling him he should be elsewhere.
The Godric’s Hollow library was situated at the opposite end of the main street. Dressed in Muggle clothes, Remus did not look out of place amongst the non-magic residents of the village, and he was grateful again for his Muggle mother, who still sent him shirts and trousers for Christmas.
Remus smiled ruefully. It had not been necessary to dress like a Muggle for in Godric’s Hollow, there was a high proportion of wizards and witches, and none of them made a particular effort to blend in. It seemed the Muggles there were used to their ‘weirdo’ neighbours, and a wizard wearing a turquoise cloak no longer caused raised eyebrows.
Arriving at the library, Remus stopped for a moment to peruse the building. It wasn’t very old “ built perhaps twenty years ago “ and he wondered why it had been chosen to house non“essential records for the Ministry. Then it struck him that its very ordinariness, it’s very Muggle-ness, made it the ideal place to record those entities who were neither Muggle nor Magic. Remus pushed open the door and walked towards the reception desk where a middle-aged woman with grey hair and blue-rimmed glasses was stamping books as children took them out.
“Can I help you?” she asked, barely looking up from the pile in front of her.
“I’m looking for Mrs Robbins,” Remus replied, giving her the name of the witch Margaret Abbott had told him to ask for.
“That’s me,” replied a soft, faintly familiar voice behind him.
Remus turned around slowly, unwilling to believe his ears. Could it really be her?
“Hello, Remus.”
“Oh, good Godric, Mary Macdonald! What on earth are you doing here?” he managed to ask in shock.
She smiled at him and, for a moment, he was transported back to lazy days at Hogwarts, spent by the Black Lake or snuggled up together in an armchair as they tried and failed to write coherent essays. She didn’t look that much different: her short dark hair showed no grey, and her face only had the merest of fine lines around her eyes.
“I work here,” she said simply. “I’m Mary Robbins.”
Of course she was married. Why wouldn’t she be? She’d always been pretty and vivacious. Any wizard would have been a fool to turn her down.
“It’s been a long time,” he said, and smiled tentatively at her.
“Thirteen and a half years,” she agreed, a cloud shadowing her eyes. Then she smiled again and gestured with her hand. “Come, I’ll take you to the back room. That’s where we keep the “ er “ papers you’re interested in, Mr Lupin.”
Still bemused by her appearance, Remus complied. “You haven’t changed,” he muttered, trying to make conversation.
“You’re sweet to say so, Remus,” she replied as she led him down a corridor and to a heavy oak door. She pulled out her wand and muttered a spell, and he heard the locks on the other side of the door grate open. “But I’m not sixteen anymore, that’s for sure.”
“You’ve aged better than I have. My occupational hazard of turning into a savage every month does not add anything to my beauty routine,” he said, testing the water with a joke and wondering if she still had recriminations to fling in his face.
She snorted. “Wizards can get away with looking old. They look distinguished. Isn’t that the word?” She looked him up and down. “You look much the same as you always did, Remus. Bit more careworn, bit more grey, but in essence you’re the same old Remus Lupin.”
“Merlin, did I look this bad at school?” He laughed, but stopped when she didn’t join in.
“I meant the same as the last time I saw you.” She paused briefly; then she looked him straight in the eye. “At the funeral.”
He shifted uncomfortably, trying to think of what he could say. Mary must have taken pity on him; when she next started speaking, it was in a far more businesslike and less intimate tone.
“What help do you need?”
“Oh, the Squib register,” he said. “I’m trying to track someone down.”
“That’s easy enough. Although, if the Squib hasn’t registered with us, I can’t help you.”
“Isn’t it mandatory?”
She shook her head. “Only if the Squib wishes to find employment in our world. If they decide to live as Muggles, then they can remain anonymous.” She giggled suddenly. “I do wish Filch had remained anonymous. Merlin, he was a bitter man.”
“Still is,” Remus answered with a grin, adding, “I taught at Hogwarts last year.”
“I know,” Mary said. “You probably don’t realise, but you taught my daughter, Demelza.”
He thought back to the classes, trying to picture a girl with dark hair like her mother. “Oh, Demelza Robbins in the first year. Yes, I know her.” He grinned suddenly. “A Gryffindor “ just like her mother. She’s a good kid, Mary.”
“Thank you.” Mary acknowledged the compliment. “She is, although she’s being unbearable at the moment. She wants to spend all her time on her broomstick. She’s desperate to try out for the team next year, even though I’ve told her it’s rare for second-years to get on the team.”
“Mmm, Gryffindor has a good team as well,” Remus agreed, enjoying this conversation. “She might have to wait a while. Is she a Chaser like her mum or a Seeker like her aunt?”
“As much as Demelza would love to be like her aunt, who is obviously much, much cooler than her mum, she’s resigned to never being Seeker “ at least whilst Harry Potter’s on the team.” Mary pulled a large book from one of the dusty shelves and laid it out on the desk. “Who are you looking for?”
“Er...” Remus hesitated; Mary looked up at him. “That’s the problem. I don’t know his name.”
“Then how do you suggest we find him?” Mary asked, raising her eyebrows. “Really, Remus, I thought you were supposed to be the logical one!”
He didn’t smile; instead, he closed his eyes as the internal debate in his head raged. How much could he tell her?
“It’s Peter Pettigrew’s cousin,” he said at last. “But I don’t know his name, or if he’s still alive.”
“Peter...”she whispered, her eyes wide open. Her face blanched, and she sat heavily in a chair. “Oh, Merlin, even after all these years, I can’t believe what happened. Poor little Peter.”
Remus nodded uneasily. “I want to find Peter’s mother. I have some items of his that she might like.” He used the same lie he’d used on Mrs Goodbody. “I’ve only just found them ... photos ... that sort of thing. I thought she might appreciate them.”
Mary gazed across at him. He noticed her eyes were swimming with unshed tears. He felt suddenly angry that she was crying over the wrong person, and wanted to tell her so. But he couldn’t “ not yet “ not while Sirius was still deemed guilty.
She sniffed noisily and stood up, returning the book to its shelf. “You don’t need to look in that, Remus,” she explained, and smiled weakly. “I know where Janet Pettigrew is.”
“You do?”
Mary nodded. “She has an unusual surname, so when someone came in to renew her books for her just after I started working here, I realised who she was.”
“Janet Pettigrew lives in Godric’s Hollow!” he exclaimed. “Where? Can you take me there?”
“No, and yes,” replied Mary. “She lives on the outskirts of the village, and yes, I can take you there, but I’m not sure you’ll have any luck.”
“Why not? It’s just a few photographs,” he lied. “And she’ll remember me. I used to visit sometimes over the holidays.”
“No doubt you did,” Mary said, sighing. “The trouble is that Janet Pettigrew now lives in a nursing home. Peter’s death was the last straw, and she lives in some kind of twilight haze where he’s still an eleven year old boy about to set off for Hogwarts.”
It hit him with the force of a hex, the utter futility of trying to find Peter, who had always had the best disguise of them all. Even if Peter had visited, she would not have recognised her son “ certainly not the quivering wreck of a man who’d pleaded for his life in the Shrieking Shack. Janet Pettigrew was the only person Peter would have visited; without her identification, he was lost.
“Are you sure?” he whispered.
“I take books up there once a month, Remus,” Mary replied. “And every time, I pop in to see her. She has no recollection of Peter ever being at school. She doesn’t remember his friends, his teachers, or even how proud he was of his Care of Magical Creatures O.W.L. mark.” She pulled out a handkerchief and audibly blew her nose. “Poor Peter, you don’t expect your mother to forget you, do you? Especially when he died a hero.”
“No,” muttered Remus, more to himself than to Mary. “I don’t think there’s much more I can do then.”
“You could give the photos to his cousin,” she suggested. “Look, I can help you find him ... I don’t mind.”
“Peter disliked his cousin,” Remus stated. “He wouldn’t have wanted him to have anything. Besides, I should get back home.” He walked towards the door, but the sound of Mary stifling a sob caused him to turn back. He owed her, after all. “I want to go to the church, Mary. Will you come with me?”
She smiled tearily at him. “Laying ghosts to rest,” she murmured, a note of bitterness in her voice.
“I was too angry and too shocked to say goodbye,” he replied. “To James, Lily ... and you. I’m not angry now.”
***
“Tell me about your husband,” he said idly as they walked out of the library and into the summer sun.
Mary shrugged. “Not much to tell. I met Willard after leaving Hogwarts. He worked at the Ministry and we went out a few times. It wasn’t serious “ not then. But after Lily died, I ...” She faltered and wouldn’t look him in the eye. “Oh, hell, Remus. You know what it was like. Dangerous times, when you seek comfort where you can. Proof that you’re alive.”
Remus flushed, but reached out and squeezed her arm.
“I discovered I was pregnant, so we got married, which seemed like a good idea at the time.”
“You were pregnant?” Remus’ eyes widened, as his brain made a rapid calculation. “Er ... When is Demelza’s birthday?”
She laughed suddenly, wildly, tossing her head back in a gesture he remembered so well from school. “She’s not yours, Remus. She could have been, I suppose, but she’s the image of her father.”
He felt ashamed, but also disgruntled by the knowledge of the other man. Looking at him, Mary snorted. “You left me, Remus, with just a single word on a parchment sheet. ‘Sorry’ really did say it all, and I knew you wouldn’t be back.”
She slowed her pace as they reached the churchyard. “You didn’t know I was married. Didn’t know I’d had a child. Did you honestly expect me to wait for you?”
“No, of course not,” he said, and sighed. “Are you happy together?”
“Happier now we’re not together,” she muttered darkly. ”We split up when Demelza was nine.” She shook her head. “Let’s not talk about that. Why don’t you go ahead and see them? I’ll wait here, if you like.”
He assented and stepped forwards but, as he reached the arched gateway into the graveyard, he turned his head back. “Come with me, Mary “ please?”
***
“What sort of time do you call this, Nymphadora?”
Sitting down next to Charlie, Tonks punched him lightly on the arm. “I sent a message saying I was running a few minutes late, Weasley!”
“Mmm, your idea of a few minutes is one that defies the laws of time travel, Tonks,” Charlie muttered. He picked up a menu and handed it to her. Then he grinned. “Bloody good to see you again.”
She grinned back. It had been nearly two years since her trip to Romania and, although Charlie had been back to see his family, they’d only been able to see each other fleetingly. This time, though, Charlie was around for a proper holiday to see the Quidditch World Cup, and she’d promised to have dinner with him. “Your dad said he’d got you some great tickets for the final,” she said as she tried to decide what to order.
“Yep, match day arrival,” Charlie replied. He signalled to a waitress and ordered himself another beer and a wine for Tonks.
“Jammy git! I have to get there three days before. It will be murder sharing a tent with dad all that time. He snores so loudly!”
“I would have a thought an Auror could’ve swung brilliant tickets,” Charlie said in surprise. “Even a junior one.”
Tonks pulled a face, but said nothing.
“Oh, please don’t tell me you’re in trouble already,“ Charlie said, laughing nervously.
“Umm, not trouble, exactly,” she replied, and sighed. “Mr Crouch doesn’t really blame me, but...” She hesitated. Charlie glared, so she swallowed and then continued. “It was all a mix-up really. A wand was stolen, and I was found unconscious along with Proudfoot “ and we, um, failed to catch the culprit.”
“Whose wand?” Charlie asked suspiciously.
Tonks shrugged. “No idea,” she replied blandly, knowing full well that the Ministry had ordered a clampdown on news of Black’s wand.
Charlie eyed her thoughtfully. He looked as if he were about to question her further, but then the waitress arrived with their drinks and took their food order.
“How is Proudfoot, now?” he asked idly, as they shared a bowl of peanuts in the centre of the table.
“An arse,” she replied, “but not quite as obnoxious now that I’m qualified. I don’t have much to do with him, to be honest. He likes Quidditch, though, so we talk about that when we do speak.” She took a sip of her drink before continuing. “I’m looking forward to seeing Krum. Is he as good as everyone says?”
“Yep,” replied Charlie. He leant back in his seat. “He’s still at school, but he plays for one of the Bulgarian sides. Merlin, he’s good. If I’d had that amount of talent ...”
“You did,” she replied reproachfully. “You just preferred dragons.”
He smiled ruefully, but said no more. Tonks realised that he was thinking about their time at Hogwarts and all the matches they’d played. Despite choosing dragons, she felt sure she and Charlie felt the same occasional pangs of regret when watching Quidditch. They could have both been players, but other things were more important. She ducked her head forwards and kissed him briefly on the cheek.
“What was that for?” he asked in surprise.
“Just for being here with me, I suppose,” she replied, winking at him. She saw him blush and, mortified that she’d embarrassed him, Tonks tried to think of something to change the subject. “Mad-Eye!”
“What?” Charlie asked in utter bemusement.
“Mad-Eye Moody,” she babbled. “Sorry, I was thinking about him, wondering if he were going to the Quidditch. Has your dad mentioned him recently?”
Charlie shrugged. “Only the usual. Dad says that since retiring he’s even more paranoid.”
Tonks bit her lip guiltily. “I haven’t seen him for ages; I really should go round one evening. He must hate retirement.”
“Not today, though, eh?” Charlie asked. “Let today just be about us catching up and having fun.”
She smiled at him, feeling more relaxed than she had in weeks, and raised her glass. “To fun,” she agreed.
***
“I was wrong,” Remus said.
“About what?” asked Mary.
They were sitting in the field behind the old Potter house. Mary had brought some food packed in a basket and offered him the last of the fruitcake.
Remus accepted the slice, but his eyes were on the house in the distance. “I thought Lily was peripheral,” he said at last. “I don’t mean unimportant, but I thought she was on the edge of things, that it was the four of us who were the core of everything.”
“You were,” Mary replied as she lay back on the rug. “Even when I was going out with you, I knew the others meant more to you.” She smiled up at him. “I told myself I didn’t mind “ but of course I did.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled. Then his eyes flicked back to the house. “But once Lily was with James, it was different. She was the core.”
“Do you think that’s what made Black turn? Was he jealous of Lily?”
Remus turned to look at Mary. He wondered what he could tell her. Martha had believed him, but Mary... He sighed. He did not know Mary “ not any more. “Perhaps,” he replied vaguely.
“I bring Demelza here, you know,” Mary said after a while. “The Muggles can’t see us flying, so we take to the air.” She closed her eyes. “Sometimes it seems like I’m back here playing with Martha, James “ ” she faltered, ““ and Sirius. I feel close to James and Lily here, you know. And I like to think James would be pleased the field’s being used again.”
Remus nodded. “He would be.”
Mary sighed and sat up, brushing crumbs from her shirt and running her hands though her hair. “I should go home. Demelza’s due back from her father’s today.”
Remus stood and, holding out his hand, pulled her to standing. “I should get going, too,” he said, although he felt an aching sadness at having to leave this place.
Mary stared at him. He tried to let go of her hand, but she would not relinquish her hold. “You could stay,” she murmured. “Just for a few more days, couldn’t you?”
He shook his head. “I’ve been here three days, Mary, but I can’t stay. Not tonight.”
“You’re running away again.”
“No,” he denied. “I’m being practical. It’s the full moon tonight. You have a daughter, and I doubt there’s anywhere secure enough to contain me.”
He thought that reminder would cause her to flinch, as Charity had, but instead Mary stepped closer towards him. Standing on tiptoe, she kissed him softly on the lips. He hesitated, briefly, before kissing her back.
“Don’t leave it another thirteen years, Lupin,” she murmured, stroking his cheek with her thumb.
He held her close, breathing in her long-forgotten scent, and smiled. He’d laughed with this girl, as she’d danced effervescently into his life, making him feel normal, whole. But he’d cried over her, too, weeping on Lily’s shoulder because he couldn’t show how much it hurt to his friends.
“May I come back to see you, Mary?”
“You may,” she whispered, imitating his formality with a slight smile.
After squeezing him tight and giving him another kiss, she stepped back. With a last look, Mary Apparated away.
Her scent lingered on the air and he inhaled it hungrily, for it spoke to him of happier times. As it evaporated on the faint breeze, he cast a last look at the Potter house, saluting the memories and paying tribute to his friends from years ago. Then he, too, returned home.
Chapter 20 - It's not only Bludgers that cause pain. by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Sorry, sorry, sorry, for the appalling delay!
Sitting on a tree stump while eating a Chocolate Frog, Tonks waited for Charlie. She’d been at the campsite for three days, now, and although she was anxious for the Quidditch World Cup final to begin, she had enjoyed the break from the office. She had to admit that the last few weeks had been rather boring. Without Moody seeing Dark Wizards everywhere and with Kingsley now designated the task of seeking out Sirius, she had nothing interesting to do at all.
“Didn’t land on top of someone this time,” Tonks called as Charlie appeared in front of her.
“Not going to let me forget that, are you?” Charlie said, sighing.
With a beaming smile, he strode across and enveloped her in a bear hug. Over his shoulder, Tonks saw two other figures appear, and her eyes widened slightly. It was silly of her, because she’d known he’d be here, but why did she suddenly feel like that stupid fourteen-year-old girl she’d once been, who’d nurtured such a crush on...
“Hi, Bill,” she said, trying not to squeak.
Damn, he still looked as she remembered: handsome, smiling and “ well, the only word for it was ‘cool.’ Hastily, she looked away, aware she was staring at him, and turned to Percy. He raised his hand to her and gave a tight-lipped smile, obviously not really approving of the close embrace she was sharing with Charlie.
“Tonks, good to see you again,” Bill said as he walked forward, his hand outstretched. “Charlie tells me you’re an Auror now.”
“Yes,” she replied simply, hating herself for not being able to come up with a witty reply. By her side, Charlie kept his arm about her waist.
“We need to let Dad know we’re here. Do you want to come along?” he asked. “Mum will have packed far too much food, so you’ll be very welcome to stay for lunch.”
“I would, but my dad’s expecting me,” she replied. Seeing his smile falter, she gave him a squeeze around the waist before she disentangled herself. “How about I meet you after lunch and we have a look around together?” She grinned at him. “I can show you which stalls to avoid. I caught a dodgy wizard called Mundungus Fletcher selling knock-off Omnioculars. They get stuck on slow motion.”
“You’re on duty, are you?” Bill asked, overhearing her comments.
Tonks shook her head. “I managed to wangle a few days off, but I’m on standby.” She looked around as other wizards and witches started Disapparating, and jumped when she saw Rob Avery with his family.
“Is the Auror Department expecting any trouble?” Bill asked, ignoring Percy’s comment that they should be moving.
“Mr Crouch has all that in hand, Bill,” Percy proclaimed. “He personally took charge of the security.”
Tonks stifled a snort when she saw Charlie turn his head away from his brother to hide a grin. Percy was just as she remembered from school, except now that he’d started at the Ministry he seemed even more pompous, if that were possible.
“I’ll see you at about two, then?” Charlie suggested.
Tonks nodded happily, but as he bent his head down towards her, she twisted her head around, so his kiss landed on her ear instead of her mouth. He smiled ruefully, but walked off with his brothers. As Tonks watched them go, she saw Bill turn around as if he were studying her. Seeing her looking at him, he raised a hand and smiled, but then a far more unfriendly look crossed his face as his eyes focused on someone behind her.
“He your latest?” Rob asked softly.
Tonks jumped; she’d not realised he’d seen her. Instinctively, she shivered and gripped her wand tighter.
“Charlie’s an old friend, Rob. You might remember him from school.”
“Nope, I remember his brother, though. Still an arrogant git.”
“I’m sure Bill remembers you as fondly,” she murmured, stepping away.
Rob caught her wrist but let go hastily when she whipped around, brandishing her wand. “Whoa, steady, Tonks,” he breathed. “I just wanted to ask if we could catch up later.” He smiled ruefully. “Last summer, I behaved very badly. I would like the chance to say sorry properly.”
“You left it a long time, Rob,” she said suspiciously. “And there’s really no need. Unless ....” She narrowed her eyes as she looked from him to his brother. “What are you after?”
“Nothing!” he declared vehemently, but she didn’t quite believe him.
“I’m busy,” she replied as she took a step away from him. “I’m having lunch with my dad, then I’m meeting Charlie and then I’m watching the match.”
“And you won’t meet up with me after?”
“It’s Quidditch,” she replied. “This game might go on for days, but no, I won’t meet up with you later.”
***
“I don’t mind you going, you know,” Remus said. “You don’t have to give up your ticket because I haven’t got one.”
He was standing outside Flourish and Blotts with Mary, who was studying a long list of books that she needed to buy for Demelza. “Hmm,” Mary said, raising her eyes to look at him. “Oh, I’m not. I mean I didn’t give up my ticket only because you weren’t going, Remus. I didn’t fancy a week of camping at the site, so when Martha said she had a spare ticket for match day ...”
“And Demelza’s fine with that, is she?” Remus asked.
Mary screwed up her nose. “I think the opportunity to attend the match with the Harpies Seeker far outweighed sharing a grotty tent with her very boring mum.”
He chuckled. “I doubt she thinks you’re boring.”
“Of course she does!” Mary scoffed. “We all thought our parents were stuffy and boring at that age, didn’t we?” She stopped suddenly. “Sorry, I didn’t think.”
Remus was silent, knowing that she was remembering his father and the relationship that had deteriorated so badly. They hadn’t been close “ not really. He’d always felt far closer to his mum. “My mum wasn’t boring,” Remus said lightly, trying to ease her embarrassment. “James and Sirius thought having a Muggle for a mum was really ‘cool’.”
She stiffened at the mention of Sirius’ name, and he wondered how long he could keep the secret of Sirius’ innocence when he was longing to proclaim it to the world.
“What did Peter think?” she asked softly.
Remus turned away from her and stared across the street. “Anything Prongs and Padfoot thought cool automatically became amazing in Wormtail’s book,” he muttered.
“You still miss them, don’t you,” she stated solemnly.
He nodded. “How could I ever replace them,” he replied truthfully. Turning back to her, he caught a glimmer of a tear in her left eye. “You miss Lily, too, don’t you?”
“Yes,” she said, and sighed. “But I didn’t lose everyone, and now I have Demelza. Children focus the mind, Remus. They’re too tangible a reminder that life really does go on.” She smiled at him and took his arm. “Come on, let’s get her books sorted out, and then we can grab lunch somewhere.”
Nodding his agreement, they entered the shop together. Considering it was the summer holidays and nearly the start of the school term, the shop was quiet; but then, as it was the day of the final match, Remus wasn’t surprised. Mary took her time searching through the books, and he smiled as she opened each one, breathing in its smell.
“It’s like being back yourself, isn’t it,” he murmured.
She smiled at him. “Mmm, shame we can’t go back. I’d love to sit around the lake again.” She tore off part of the list and handed it to him. “I will be here all day at this rate, so would you go and find her Defence book for me?”
“Sure,” he agreed, and stared at the name of the book, wondering who the new professor would be, feeling a pang inside of him that he was not the one devising the book list. Could he have broken the fabled curse? Should he have stuck it out and defied the parents and governors?
Perusing the bookshelves, he tried not to think about the new term and his lack of a job. He had some money behind him, having saved much of his year’s salary, but it wouldn’t last forever. He would have to find something else soon. His hand touched another and, withdrawing it, he muttered an apology and stepped away.
The woman by his side looked up at him and gave him a tentative smile. She was short and plump, with brown, friendly eyes. But it was her hair that gave her away. Flame red, it framed her face, highlighting her freckles but clashing alarmingly with her reddening cheeks.
“Prof ... Mr Lupin,” she said.
He inclined his head slightly, waiting for her to flinch away from him. “Mrs Weasley, I believe.”
She nodded and smiled at him, albeit nervously. “That’s right. You “ taught my children last year,” she said, and then she smiled properly. “They speak very highly of you “ even Fred and George, which is saying something.”
“Thank you,” he replied, unable to say more, grateful that she was speaking to him at all.
“Are you going back to Hogwarts?” she asked, indicating the book in his hand, and now she sounded nervous again.
“No, no, I’m looking for a book for a friend’s daughter, that’s all.” He stared at her and gave her a rueful smile. “Don’t worry, Mrs Weasley, I won’t be teaching your children again. They’re safe from me.”
“OH!” she exclaimed. “That’s not what I meant “ not at all.” But she sounded flustered, and he knew right then that he could not have held out at Hogwarts.
He picked up Demelza’s textbook and turned away; she pulled on his sleeve. “Mr Lupin, it’s not that I don’t think you’re a good teacher. My children raved about you “ so pleased to have a decent Defence teacher, at last, but ...”
He smiled wryly; there was always a ‘but’. “I’m a werewolf,” he finished for her, “and that’s not something I can change. Believe me, Mrs Weasley, I do understand.”
She looked embarrassed now, wringing her hands, yet still imploring him to listen. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled. She looked away from him and dropped her hand from his sleeve. Yet as he started to walk away from her and back to Mary, she began to speak again. “When we first found out, I won’t lie, I was horrified. My husband, Arthur, was calmer. He kept saying that Professor Dumbledore must have known what he was doing. But I ....” She paused for breath and then swallowed. “I’m a mother, Mr Lupin. We have an overwhelming urge to protect our children, however old they get. But ...”
This time, the ‘but’ sounded different.
“You worked with my son Charlie, Mr Lupin. He mentioned it when he came home,” she finished.
“Yes, I did,” Remus replied, wondering where this was leading, but liking the sudden flash of warmth in her eyes.
“He said you knew my brothers. That you’d fought with them during the war.” She smiled at him. It was a sad smile, but a genuine one with no hesitancy. “Charlie’s home for the Quidditch. He arrived right in the middle of an argument I was having with my daughter “ over you. I don’t know if you remember Ginny, but she’s a stubborn girl.”
Remus smiled warmly at her. Ginny Weasley was a determined girl, just as determined as her mother was, it seemed, to get her point across.
“Charlie told me I was prejudiced. He told me he’d worked alongside you in the dragon enclosures, and you were a good worker and a good man.”
Remus swallowed, unable to speak, but as she held out her hand, he took it in his. “How is Charlie?” he asked.
She raised her eyebrows, no longer the protective mother but a woman slightly exasperated with her second son. “He’s fine but fretting over some girl, but I’m sure she only sees him as a friend.”
He heard Mary’s voice calling him and tore himself away before he could ask if the cause of Charlie’s fretting was a certain Metamorphmagus of their acquaintance.
“Who was that?” Mary asked casually as she paid for the books, several rolls of parchment and some new quills.
“Molly Weasley,” he replied, watching as Molly Weasley shuffled across to the second-hand book section. “I taught five of her children last year.”
“Oh, I’ve heard all about those twins of hers,” Mary said, and started laughing. “Demelza tells me they’re the best pranksters in the school. I told her she’d never met the Marauders.”
He joined in the laughter and soon they were reminiscing, swapping stories and ‘do you remember’ times.
***
“How can you be hungry?” Tonks asked Charlie in amazement. “I thought you’d had lunch.”
“That,” retorted Charlie as he selected a chocolate cauldron cake and a bag of chestnuts from a stall, “was an hour ago. I need to keep my strength up for when I get back to Romania.”
“Not persuaded to come back then?” she asked, adding slyly, “It would make your mum so happy. You could get a job at the Ministry.”
Charlie snorted and rolled his eyes. “Can you see me writing reports on cauldron bottoms?”
He bit into his cake and together they started walking slowly along the rows of stalls.
“I do miss England, you know, but I love working with dragons. There’d have to be a really good reason to return.”
He stopped walking, and held her gaze. Under such intense scrutiny, Tonks blushed and looked away. She heard Charlie sigh; then, handing her half of his cake, he linked arms with her, and they carried on walking.
The stalls were now bustling as everyone had arrived. Tonks looked around her, not sure who she was hoping to see, but interested all the same in everyone, friend or stranger.
“There’s a man over there watching you,” Charlie remarked. “Is he a friend?”
Tonks looked where Charlie was pointing and pulled a face. “No, that’s a rather annoying man called Rob Avery. He’s a journalist.”
Charlie creased his brow. “Was he the bloke who wrote the articles about you and the Auror department?” She nodded non-commitally. “So why don’t you want to speak to him? He wrote some great things about you.”
“I went out with him,” she muttered, “very briefly. He’s an arse.”
Charlie suddenly looked more cheerful. “And there was me thinking you were still pining after Remus Lupin.”
“Ha ha, not at all funny,” she snapped. “I haven’t seen Lupin for ages.”
Charlie stopped walking and opened his bag of chestnuts, offering her first pick. “Must have come as a shock, discovering he was a werewolf,” he muttered sympathetically.
She smiled wanly as she rooted around in the bag. “I knew, actually,” she admitted.
“Since when?” Charlie sounded shocked.
Tonks took a deep breath. “Since I was seventeen. Remember when I went off to see him with the Veritaserum?”
Charlie nodded slowly.
“He’d transformed the night before.”
“Merlin, Tonks, and you stayed there with him. Weren’t you scared?”
She thought back to that time, mulling over the memories in her head. “No,” she said truthfully. “I wasn’t at all scared. I knew he wasn’t James and Lily’s killer by then and he just seemed “ sad, I suppose, and lost. He had no friends left at all.”
Charlie said nothing, but she felt him draw her closer to him. He was probably thinking that she was sad again about Sirius, and the need to tell him suddenly overwhelmed her. She wanted Charlie to know that she’d been right “ that Sirius was innocent and all the risks she’d taken had been worthwhile.
“Charlie,” she began. “I need to tell you something.”
“Tonks!” Rob called as he strode towards them. “I really do need a word.” He turned towards Charlie. “You don’t mind, do you, Weasley?”
“Er...” Charlie looked blank and started to pull away, but Tonks pulled him back.
“I told you I was busy, Rob. If you need to speak to me, then call me at the Auror office,” she said, trying to inject a note of boredom in her voice.
“It’s about your cousin,” he murmured.
Tonks stared at Rob, and then slowly disentangled herself from Charlie. “What about him?” she asked warily.
“Got your attention now,” Rob breathed.
“Get on with it,” she muttered. “Say what you have to and then go.”
“A wand went missing, Jacob tells me,” Rob said, smirking at her. “And you were there at the time.”
“So was Jacob,” Tonks replied, wondering exactly what he knew. “We were both Stunned. It’s not a secret, Rob.”
“Just a bit of a coincidence that you’re in the APE room, when it went missing, especially when I discovered which wand had gone.”
“No one knows which wand was stolen,” she replied cagily. Aware that Charlie was drawing closer and listening to every word, she tried to walk away, but Rob plucked at her sleeve.
“My source tells me it was Black’s wand, Nymphadora,” he murmured menacingly. “And I remember you being quite vocal in his defence once.”
“Tonks, what is he talking about?” Charlie asked, sounding worried but also slightly angry.
“It’s nothing, Charlie,” she said blithely. “I told you that a wand went missing. Proudfoot and I got into trouble over it. I don’t know whose wand was taken” She paused and turned back to Rob; he was studying her intently, not smiling now. “And you don’t know either, do you, Avery?”
“My source told me -” he began.
“Ha! Let me guess. Your source is yourself trying to dig up another story. Won’t work, Rob. I’m clueless about this one.” She smirked at him. “Go and ask Scrimgeour or Fudge. I’m sure they’ll give you a quote.”
When he didn’t say anything else, she knew she’d won “ at least temporarily “ so she turned back to Charlie and pulled him away. But as she started to chat about the Quidditch, telling him how excited she was about seeing Krum fly, he stayed silent.
“Where did you see him play?” she asked, hoping to elicit a response.
“You stole Black’s wand, didn’t you,” he said flatly. Not questioning at all, but stating a fact.
“Erm ...” Tonks looked at all the people milling around them. “Charlie, this isn’t the time.”
“Never is, is it,” he remarked coldly. Then he slammed the palm of his hand against his forehead. “Merlin, I’ve been so stupid. I thought you’d seen sense. I thought, as you’d stopped mentioning him in every bloody letter, that you’d finally realised what the rest of the wizarding world has always known. But you helped Black, didn’t you? You helped him escape.”
“No!” she exclaimed, then lowered her voice as several people turned to look. “I did not help Sirius escape from Azkaban.”
“But you’ve helped him since, haven’t you?”
She could see desperation in Charlie’s eyes, willing her to deny his accusation, but she couldn’t.
“Yes,” she replied in a small voice. “Charlie ... look ... I was about to tell you, but then Rob butted in. Please ... listen.”
But Charlie had pulled away and was glaring furiously at her.
“He’s a mass murderer,” Charlie hissed. “I don’t care what you think. You should have turned him in.”
“That’s you all over, isn’t it, Weasley!” she spat back. “So bloody set in your ways. So bloody judgemental. You won’t even to listen to me when I try to tell you the truth.”
“Me! Set in my ways?” he yelled. “That’s rich coming from someone who’s never once considered that she could be wrong. Merlin, you’re infuriating!”
Despite the heat of the afternoon, Tonks felt a chill through her bones. She turned away from Charlie, intending to walk straight back to her dad, but he grabbed her arm.
“You need to tell the Aurors where he is,” he said bluntly. “You can make amends. Say you were Imperiused or something. It might not count against you.”
“You go and see them, Weasley,” she retorted. “Go on, tell them everything. And while you’re there, tell them all about your brother and Harry and their friend, that girl, Hermione something. They helped him too, you know.” She saw the shock in his face and laughed bitterly. “Oh, and Professor Dumbledore. Go on, Charlie. Go and find Fudge, now. I’m sure he’ll be interested.”
She heard him spluttering something, but didn’t wait to hear his reply. Instead, she stormed off across the fields where she was soon swallowed up by the multitudes.
She walked around, brooding and taking in nothing, for a good half an hour. Thirty minutes ruminating on Charlie’s words. She knew he wouldn’t go and see the Minister. There was no way he’d do anything without at least talking to his brother first. But there it was: he’d believe Ron, and had never believed her.
“Where’s Charlie?” said a voice on her right, surprising her.
As she looked up, she smiled hesitantly at Bill.
“We had a bit of a row,” she admitted. “I left him back there somewhere.”
“Oh, dear,” Bill said, and sighed. “I could see that coming.”
“Really?”
Bill put his hands in his jeans pockets and started walking alongside her. “Mmm, I suppose he asked you out again. I hope you let him down gently.”
“Uh, no and no, actually,” she replied, and annoyingly started to blush. “It was nothing to do with us.” She took a breath. “I like your brother a lot, Bill. He’s my best friend in the entire world, and I’d love it to work between us. But there’s always been something missing, you know?”
Bill shrugged. “Not really. I can’t see why you can’t hook up for a while. You liked him enough once, didn’t you?”
“Yes,” she admitted. “I liked him enough to kiss him, but then ...” She stopped speaking, desperate to morph the blush away from her cheeks. “I kissed someone else, and that made a difference.”
“Avery?” he queried, with a note of distaste in his voice.
“Merlin, no!” she replied scornfully. “Well, I did kiss him, once, but ...” She pulled a face and mimed being sick.
Bill laughed. “So you’re with someone else, are you?”
Tonks sighed, thinking regretfully of Remus and the fact that she hadn’t seen or contacted him in over a month. “No,” she said sadly. “I’m not with him and I’m not sure I ever will be.”
“Then shouldn’t you give up and have a bit of fun,” Bill suggested. “You can’t pine away. Charlie might be just what you need.”
“Possibly,” she replied in a non-committal voice. “But Charlie knows we’re just friends now.” She looked at him, puzzled by something. “Is fun all you’re after, Bill? There’s no Egyptian witch you’re ‘pining’ for?”
“Me?” He grinned at her. “Nope. Never been that attached to anyone. I see my Mum and Dad “ match made in heaven and all that“ but no one has come close.”
“So no wife and family in your grand plan?”
He chuckled and, taking her arm, led her through the crowds towards the clearing where she’d sat earlier and waited for Charlie. “Can’t see myself ever wanting to settle down, Tonks. And she’d have to be a bloody strong woman to cope with all the flak from my mum.”
She sat next to him on the tree trunk, and accepted a toffee from his bag. She liked this, sitting with Bill and chatting about their lives. His tales about Egypt intrigued her, and he was interested in her job too, sounding genuinely fascinated about the Auror department. “I miss Mad-Eye,” she said regretfully. “Kingsley is great, but Mad-Eye used to let me off the leash a bit.”
“I know Kingsley,” Bill mused. “He was stationed in Egypt for a while. Good bloke.” He selected another toffee, and was about to pop it into his mouth when something stopped him. “Whoa, is that the Harpies’ Seeker walking this way?” His voice sounded suddenly adolescent, and not nearly as calm as before. “Bloody hell, she’s coming over.”
Tonks looked up, and waved at Martha. “She’s a friend of mine, actually. Shall I introduce you?” She smiled to herself as Bill suddenly seemed incapable of coherent speech.
“Martha, hello,” she called across the field. “When did you arrive?”
“Just now,” Martha replied. “The perk of being a current player means I get excellent tickets.” From behind her back, a girl appeared, smiling shyly. “This is my niece, Demelza, who has come to watch the match with me.” She turned to Bill, eyeing his red hair. “You must be Charlie Weasley. Tonks has mentioned you.”
“Er ... No, actually, I’m his brother,” Bill replied, his voice shaking only slightly now. He swallowed and held out his hand. “Miss Macdonald, I’m a huge fan!”
Martha smiled at him. “Thank you, but you can’t have seen that many of my matches, surely? I was abroad for a long time.”
“Oh, I saw the Cygnes play a few times when I was training in Calais, and “ I followed your career. The match against the Toulouse Tigres. Wow, that was a difficult catch. I doubt even Krum could do that.” He stopped talking, probably aware that he was babbling.
“Bill no doubt had a poster of you in his dorm,” Tonks said mischievously, and when Bill glared at her, she knew she was right and started snorting.
“Well, that is sweet,” Martha said, bestowing a wide smile on Bill. “It is always great to meet a fan, especially someone who knows about the game.”
“Are you Fred and George’s brother?” Demelza asked, staring up at him in awe.
“Uh-huh,” he replied, and smiled down at her. “You’re at Hogwarts, are you?”
She nodded. “I’m in Gryffindor, like your brothers. I can’t wait for the new term. I want to try out for the team.”
“What position?” Bill asked.
“Well, I’d really like to be Seeker, but I have no chance whilst Harry Potter’s at the school.” She pulled a gloomy face. “I couldn’t be Keeper, either “ too short “ and your brothers are the best Beaters at Hogwarts.”
“Chaser,” Tonks interrupted. “Best position on the field. You get to be in the thick of the action, and you can score lots of goals. I loved it and wouldn’t have played any other position.”
Demelza looked at Tonks as if seeing her for the first time. “My mum was a Chaser. She says the same thing. Did you play for Gryffindor, too?” Demelza asked.
Tonks shook her head. “Hufflepuff,” she replied.
Demelza smiled kindly at her. “Oh, well, never mind.”
“Er... What?”
Martha raised her eyebrows. “Demelza, that is incredibly rude, especially as you were complaining on the way over that Hufflepuff beat Gryffindor last year. Mmm, I seem to remember you were very annoyed with Cedric Diggory for catching the Snitch. And from what I’ve heard, Tonks was an amazing player!”
“Sorry,” muttered Demelza. Then she faltered and her eyes opened wide with excitement. “Oh ... Tonks! I’ve heard of you. Didn’t you set the record for the fastest one hundred?”
Tonks nodded a little stiffly, still stung by the slur on Hufflepuff, but then as Demelza continued talking, she smiled back.
“And I’ve heard you’re a Metamorphmagus . That is just so cool. Can you change your hair to any colour?”
Tonks screwed up her nose and in an instant changed her light brown hair dark like Demelza’s, then red like Bill’s, finally settling on blonde curls like Martha’s. Tonks laughed, relishing Demelza’s enjoyment, yet noting at the same time that Bill was watching her with amusement and appreciation.
“That is amazing!” Demelza breathed in awe. “Wow, I wish I could do that.”
“Agreed,” said Martha, laughing. “It would be so much easier to shake off fans who want to complain when you’ve played badly.”
“And to keep my hair tidy,” Demelza agreed, shaking her messy curls. “Mum would have to stop nagging me, then.”
“I don’t think they ever do stop nagging,” Bill mused. “Even now I’m grown up and living in Egypt, my mum manages to nag me by letter “ especially over my hair.” He ran his hand through his hair, releasing it from its ponytail. “She keeps threatening me with scissors.”
“What do you do, Bill?” asked Martha. She sat down on the grass in front of him, shaking her head when he offered her his space on the tree trunk stump.
“Curse breaker,” he replied, now sounding far more like the assured man Tonks remembered from school. “For Gringotts.”
“And your brother works with dragons, Tonks tells me,” Martha said, bringing Tonks right back into the conversation. “Where’s he today?”
“Not sure,” Tonks replied lightly; then she turned to Demelza. “Does Angelina Johnson still play? I remember her from my last match. She was very good. ”
Demelza nodded and they started talking about Quidditch. Hearing the excitement in Demelza’s voice, Tonks was transported back to the wondrous years she’d spent at Hogwarts, and felt a pang of regret that she’d not taken old Bloomsbury up on his offer of a contract at Puddlemere.
“So do you still play at all?” Demelza was asking her.
Tonks shook her head. “I fly when I can, but it’s not much fun when there’s no one else to fly with,” she said, sighing.
Cutting off her conversation with Bill, Martha leant across. “The Harpies run open training sessions, Tonks. You’re always welcome to drop in on those.”
“Really?” Tonks smiled widely at Martha. “Is that possible? That would be fantastic. Thank you so much.”
“Can I come along?” Demelza asked, but from the way her lower lip was settling into a pout, Tonks was sure she already knew the answer.
“’Fraid not, Melz,” Martha said ruefully. “You’re too young. Besides you’ll be back at Hogwarts soon, and your mum takes you flying all the time.”
Demelza pulled a face. “Well, she did,” she responded sulkily. “But now that she’s found herself a boyfriend...”
“Er, what?” This was obviously news to Martha. She grinned at Tonks and Bill. “Twelve-year-olds tend to think your love-life stops when you reach thirty. Mary’s been divorced for two years, it’s probably time she had some fun.” Purloining one of Bill’s toffees, she held it out to Demelza. “Come on, spill the beans. I want to know all about him!”
Demelza stared at her aunt witheringly. “It’s not funny, Aunt Martha.”
Martha dropped the sweet into Demelza’s hand. “Sorry, is he horrible ?” she asked sympathetically. “If he is, I can always hex him for you.”
Demelza rolled her eyes. “He’s perfectly nice. It’s just embarrassing, that’s all.”
“All that kissing. Yeuch!” agreed Tonks, and stifled a giggle as she caught Bill’s eye.
“It’s not even that,” Demelza said, and groaned. “He’s my old teacher. That’s the problem. Mum’s started seeing Professor Lupin “ that’s just so embarrassing. I daren’t tell any of my friends.”
She prattled on, complaining about her mum and bemoaning the fact that, although Professor Lupin was very kind, it was still mortifying having your teacher in the house.
Tonks stared at her in shock, not taking in a word, just feeling the colour run from her face. Mary Macdonald, Remus’ ex-girlfriend from school. Merlin, she’d been so stupid. She caught Martha staring at her, eyes full of compassion.
“I need to find my dad,” Tonks said, getting up suddenly. “He’ll be worried. Bye, Martha. See you another time, perhaps. Nice to meet you, Demelza. Hope you “ er “ enjoy the Quidditch.”
She moved away quickly but Martha grabbed her by the wrist. “I had no idea,” she murmured. “Or I’d have told you myself.”
“Told me what?” Tonks whispered. “Remus is a friend, that’s all and I’ve not spoken to him for ages. Uh, Martha, I really do have to go.” She smiled brightly, hoping she didn’t look as brittle as she suddenly felt.
“If you want to talk, drop me an owl,” Martha insisted. “And I mean it about dropping in on those Harpies sessions.”
“Thanks,” Tonks muttered.
She wanted to ask why Martha was bothering with her, why she was being kind, but Tonks thought she knew the answer. Sirius was their connection, just as he was her connection to Remus. It was a strangely sobering thought, but now Sirius was free, perhaps she should be severing the connections and start anew.
“I should go. Hope you enjoy the match,” she muttered, and raising her hand to Demelza she waved goodbye.
“Tonks, wait up,” Bill called. He strode after her, catching up quickly as she struggled to disappear in the crowd. “You okay?”
“Fine,” she replied, a shade too brightly. And to emphasize the fact she started changing her hair and nose, in an attempt to make him laugh.
He wasn’t fooled, she could see that by the sardonic lilt to his smile, but he didn’t press her for details. “I think I can see what my brother likes about you,” he said, smiling down at her. “Shall we go and find him? He’ll probably be back at the tent with the others “ and feeling horrible, I should think.”
“No,” she said with an air of finality. “Sorry, Bill, I don’t want to speak to Charlie right now.”
“Okay.” He sighed.”I’ve tried my best. Shall we go and find your dad, or would you rather grab a beer?”
She looked up at him and then around her, noticing that several young witches were eyeing Bill with admiration, their expressions changing to surprise when they saw whom he was with. Resisting the urge to morph herself some shining pre-Raphaelite curls, Tonks nodded.
“Dad’s probably in the beer tent, as it is,” she said. “But please don’t feel you have to keep me company, Bill.”
“A pretty girl on my arm isn’t exactly a chore, Tonks,” he murmured.
And despite the gloom she was feeling over the revelation that Remus was with someone else, Tonks couldn’t help feel flattered. She was with Bill Weasley, the wizard every witch at Hogwarts had nursed a short- or long-range crush on. It was presumptuous “ again “ of her, but perhaps, just for one afternoon, she could dream.
End Notes:
Again, apologies for the delay. Hit by Real Life and nano in November.
Chapter 21 - Work, Rest and Play by Equinox Chick
Author's Notes:
Thank you so much to Kara (Karaley Dargen) and Ari (Royari, who really went the extra mile with this chapter because it was a pig to write.
It was nightfall when the match ended. Beaming widely, Tonks clutched her green rosette and cheered to the skies when Krum caught the Snitch and the referee declared the game to be over. By her side, Ted was taking in the sight as the players swooped down to the ground awaiting the presentation of the cup. She hugged him exuberantly, pleased to have shared this moment with him. Her dad had always been there for her, through everything, and she had so enjoyed the past few days in his company.
“That was the best match ever!” Tonks cried as the Irish team’s captain, Lynch, held the Quidditch World Cup aloft. “Merlin, I wish I could play again.”
“You regretting turning down that offer?” asked her dad, giving her a nudge. “Could have got us much better tickets if my daughter had been a pro.”
She laughed again and linked arms with him. “Not really, Dad. I love being an Auror, although there are some days “ or nights like this “ I wish I could play again.”
“I’d have been your biggest fan,” he replied, smiling down at her indulgently. “But only if you’d played for the Tornadoes.”
She punched his arm lightly. “I would have wanted to play for the Harpies, Dad. You know that!”
“Sometimes I wonder how on earth you can be my daughter,” Ted mused as he squeezed her arm. They were jammed in the queue now, waiting to leave the stadium, and he held his hands over his ears. “The Irish are in good voice. I hope we manage to get some sleep tonight!”
“Sleep! As long as there’s no crisis at work, I’m not due in until Monday,” Tonks protested. “We should be enjoying ourselves.”
Ted laughed. “Dora, my love, you’ve had three nights already with your old dad. I think I might find some of my friends and perhaps share some Firewhisky over a game of cards. Why don’t you go and find Charlie?”
Tonks shrugged. “I don’t think Charlie wants to talk to me,” she said, and lowered her voice as the crowds swarmed past them. “I wanted to talk to him about...er...Mum’s cousin, but someone else got there first and he stomped off.” She kicked at a stone with her foot. “Perhaps I’ll catch up with Martha, instead.”
She saw her dad give her one of his ‘looks’. Actually, it wasn’t his ‘look’ but one he’d picked up from her mum, and Tonks knew exactly what the ‘look’ meant. She’d told her parents, backed by Professor Dumbledore, about Sirius’ innocence and, although they’d believed her, they were still annoyed that she’d got herself involved.
“I lost the only member of my family I gave a damn about to Azkaban,” she said. “I will not lose you, too, Nymphadora!”
Then remembering that her daughter’s new friend, Martha Macdonald, had been a former girlfriend of Sirius’ had sent Andromeda into a spin. She had begged Tonks to keep out of trouble, and Ted had agreed.
“Martha has no idea where he is,” Tonks muttered under her dad’s narrow gaze.
“And what about that Lupin fellow?” he inquired, attempting to sound casual. “Is he here?”
“No idea,” lied Tonks through gritted teeth, knowing very well that Remus was probably wrapped up in bed with Martha’s sister. “Not seen him for weeks.”
She heard her dad sigh with what could only be relief. Although she knew him to be a fair man, he’d been shocked when he’d found out the truth about Remus. Her parents’ horror that she’d been consorting with a werewolf was, she knew, out of concern for her safety. She’d tried to explain about Wolfsbane and how Remus was of more danger to himself than anyone else, but the prejudice borne from years of hearing horror stories in the Prophet had left them both with a warped picture of someone skirting the edges of society.
A yell from the right caused them both to turn their heads. Walking towards her and levitating several bottles of beer on a tray were Charlie and Bill, both with huge smiles on their faces. Ted grinned at her. “There you are, two Weasleys for the price of one,” he murmured, and pushed her towards them. “Now, go and make up with that lad of yours. You know your mother likes him.”
Tonks rolled her eyes. “Mum liked Rob Avery and he turned out to be an arse.” She let go of his arm and wriggled her way towards Charlie, pleased that he seemed happy to see her.
“Wotcher!” she cried. “Great match, wasn’t it?”
“We escaped to find the beer tent while dad tries to work out how to make cocoa the Muggle way,” Charlie replied, as he gave her a hug, adding in a low voice, “I hate arguing with you, Tonks. Can we forget about earlier?”
“Sure,” she whispered back, and held him tight.
“Your dad’s welcome to join us,” Bill interrupted.
Tonks turned back to Ted; he was watching on fondly and gestured with his hand for her to go. “I think he’s going to look up some friends and lose all his money at cards,” she said, adding impishly, “He’s making the most of being off the marital ball and chain and does not need his daughter cramping his style.”
Bill laughed. “Dad will be envious. He has to look after a cauldron load of kids. Wonder what Mum’s doing without all of us to cluck over.”
“She’ll be cleaning the house and baking cakes, if I know her,” Charlie put in, “and making plans to give you a short back and sides “ you know how she’s itching to attack your hair.”
“Or maybe Molly is a enjoying a night away from all of you mob!” Tonks exclaimed as she accepted one of Bill’s airborne bottles of beer. It was a warm night, and she relished the ice-cold drink.
They wandered along the track until they found some space, and the three of them lay there on the dry grass, staring at the stars.
“This reminds me of Romania,” Tonks said idly, as she sipped her beer. “How is everyone there?”
“If you mean Alexa,” Charlie began, “she’s fine...I think.”
“You think?” Tonks queried. “Doesn’t she work there anymore?”
“Got married,” Charlie said, yawning. “Her ex from school turned up.”
“You don’t sound particularly bothered,” Bill remarked idly. “I thought you were really into her?”
Charlie pulled a face and then laughed. “I couldn’t face the mother-in-law, to be honest, so when Gustav turned up, I nobly let her go.”
“Not very fair on Catalina,” Bill said. He sat up and opened three more beers with his wand. “She was great to me when I visited. Very accommodating.”
Tonks began to gurgle with laughter. Remembering Catalina’s penchant for men and antipathy towards anyone female, she giggled uncontrollably. “I think your brother likes older women, Charlie,” she teased. “He was all over Martha when I introduced him earlier.”
“Unfair!” protested Bill. “It’s not every day you come face to face with your school crush!” He rounded on Charlie who was now snorting with laughter. “At least I had a poster of a girl on my wall, and not a bloody dragon!”
Tonks started giggling even more, enjoying the camaraderie between the brothers.
Then Bill turned to her. “Who did you have a crush on at school?”
“Me? Uh...no one,” she replied, aware that Charlie was motionless beside her.
“Liar,” Charlie muttered. Then he sat up and placed a hand on her shoulder. “Nymphadora had her eyes on only one person throughout her whole time at Hogwarts, Bill. I thought you knew.”
Tonks looked at Charlie aghast, praying to Merlin that he wasn’t going to spill the beans on her crush on his brother.
“Interesting,” Bill replied. Pushing himself up, he took another swig of his beer. “Anyone I know?”
“Uh...uh...” stuttered Tonks.
Then she heard Charlie snorting. “Severus Snape,” he said at last. “Tonks was the only pupil who liked him. I swear I caught her crying into her cauldron on several occasions if he didn’t speak to her, and she used to brew Amortentia and waft it under his greasy nose as he walked past.”
Bill spat his beer out and started choking. Laughing with relief that Charlie had only been teasing, Tonks bent over and thumped Bill on the back. “Git!” she mouthed at Charlie. He winked back at her, and smiled again as he got up.
“Off to get more beer,” he explained as he started walking away. “Tonks, you want some?”
She chewed at her lip. “Better not, Charlie, I might be on duty later.”
Bill yawned and then leant towards her. “Very responsible of you, Tonks. Not sure I could be an Auror “ you sound as if you have less fun than Perce.”
She liked the way he smiled at her. It wasn’t a beaming, open grin, like Charlie’s, but a smile that gave a hint of something else. Bill had a lazy way of looking at her, of running his eyes over her face as if he were assessing her. If it had been someone else, this air of assurance would have struck her as arrogance. If Rob had been looking at her like that, she’d have edged away. In contrast, Bill seemed confident, not cocky.
She sighed. “It’s all the Mad-Eye’s fault “ you know who I mean?” Bill nodded, so she continued. “He used to growl at me about reflexes and how alcohol slowed you down.” She shrugged. “I’m not much of a drinker. Sorry, does that make me boring?”
“Not swayed by the crowd,” Bill replied, and very softly flipped her on the nose. “I think that makes you...special.”
Tonks willed herself not to redden, yet could not stop the smile that crept over her face. Bill Weasley, the cool Head Boy from school, was flirting with her, and she wasn’t quite sure how to respond.
“Beers up!” Charlie said, sitting down on the ground in front of her, “and a Butterbeer for you, Tonks.” He yawned. “Wonder if Dad’s managed to light the fire yet.”
Tonks jerked back from Bill, accepted the drink from Charlie and tried not to look flustered. Glancing sideways at Bill, she wondered about the way he’d reacted when Charlie had returned. He’d moved away and started a conversation with his brother, yet all the while she could feel his gaze flickering towards her.
She wanted to smile back at him, flirt a little and let him know that perhaps she, too, was up for a bit of fun...but Charlie was there.
***
“Dad, wake up!”
“Whazzat?” Ted sounded confused and groggy, and smelling the sour Firewhisky on his breath as she leant over, Tonks understood why.
“Dad, there’s some sort of disturbance on the campsite,” she hissed urgently. “I’m going to see if they need my help.”
“What disturbance?” Ted demanded, sitting up on his camp bed. He was still wearing his Muggle clothes “ wide legged nylon trousers and a brown striped shirt “ not having bothered to change when he’d stumbled in.
“Probably nothing,” she replied, but inside she wasn’t as confident. She could hear screams that sounded fearful, not like the Irish carousing. Pulling on jeans and t-shirt over her pyjamas, she grabbed her wand and crawled out the front of the tent.
“Dora, wait. I’ll come with you,” she heard her dad call. Looking back, she smothered a laugh when she saw his bleary face poking through the tent flap.
“Dad, stay where you are. There’s no point. Besides, I doubt you can aim straight right now.”
Giving him a wave, she dashed off into the night and towards the source of the noise. Ahead of her, she saw a tall wizard charging towards the centre of the campsite, his wand raised.
“Kingsley,” she yelled. “What’s happening?”
Without stopping, he glanced over his shoulder and smiled grimly. “A few of Voldemort’s old friends have decided to join the party. Fancy routing them with me?”
“Oh, yes,” she breathed. “And if we see Lucius Malfoy “ he’s mine.”
“You’ll need to join the queue,” Kingsley muttered. “Arthur Weasley has a few scores to settle with that man.”
She stumbled as she ran over guy ropes and tree roots, all designed to catch the less agile, then slowed when she saw Kingsley had stopped. In front of them, some children scurried past, heading for the woods. Tonks recognised Fred and George protecting their sister as she ran between them, and she cast her eyes anxiously around, looking for Charlie and Bill.
A loud throng of laughter swept towards her. Emerging through the huddle of tents was a group of cloaked figures marching towards the clearing, levitating what looked like badly-dressed mannequins sixty feet in the air.
“Gods! They’ve got hold of the Muggles!” Kingsley shouted.
Without waiting for Tonks, he charged towards them, firing curses at the leaders of the parade. There was something stopping the curses, and Tonks realised the Death Eaters had cast protective spells around them so they could enjoy their sport. In horror, she watched as one of the children started screaming, his cries almost drowned out by the laughter below. A tent burst into flames and panicked witches picked up their children and fled out of harm’s way.
“Aguamenti!” roared Charlie as he ran up behind her. “Come on! Let’s deal with the fire before it spreads.”
Tonks nodded at him and began directing large jets of water over the site, trying to prevent the other tents from catching alight. In the firelight, the silhouette of a woman holding the hand of a young girl caused Tonks to gasp. “Martha,” she screamed. “This way. Get Demelza to the woods.”
There was something wrong. Martha was running hell-bent towards the Death Eaters and dragging a screaming Demelza with her. Without thinking, Tonks propelled herself towards them in a desperate attempt to save her friend. Grabbing Martha around the waist, she brought her to the ground, landing awkwardly. “Martha!” she gasped. “It’s Tonks. What’s the matter?”
“I can’t see,” Martha cried. “Stinging jinx got me in the face. Where’s Demelza? Is she okay?”
“I’m here,” Demelza replied. Although she looked terrified, she was managing to hold her voice remarkably steady.
Tonks reached across and squeezed her on the knee. “She’s fine,” Tonks urged, and smiled encouragingly at the young girl. “Demelza, take Martha away, okay?” Demelza nodded, so Tonks turned to Martha. “Get to the woods and wait for me. I’ll try and get you a Portkey, or else take you both with Side-Along-Apparition.”
“What’s happening?” Martha whispered to Tonks. “Someone said it was Death Eaters. Merlin, I haven’t seen them since “” She shuddered and lowered her voice even more, ““ not since the last time I saw Sirius.”
“Yeah, it is,” Tonks murmured, then pulled Martha to her feet. “Look, I’ve got to help Kingsley and the others. You go, now!”
Ushering them both towards the woods, Tonks pelted back to Charlie. Adept at handling dragons and their flames, he had succeeded in putting out most of the fires now. With her help, they were soon doused; then, giving Tonks a quick nod, Charlie joined her as she approached the marching Death Eaters.
Firing into them, trying to find a way through their protective spells, Tonks watched Arthur as he gazed anxiously at the Muggles twisting in the air whilst the Death Eaters roared their approval.
“We need to get the Muggles down! That has to be the priority,” she heard him shout. “Cast Cushioning Charms on the ground in case they fall.”
Hearing Arthur, the tall Death Eater at the front lifted his wand and aimed a jinx his way. Intended for Arthur, it would have caught him square in the face, but for Crouch firing towards the pack at the same time. As the Death Eater’s jinx ricocheted to the left, Tonks heard a strangled cry and saw a figure crumple to the ground.
“Hell!” shouted Charlie, charging forward. “That’s Bill.”
“Charlie, calm down!” Tonks yelled as he started firing blindly over the Death Eater’s heads. She grabbed at his wand arm, and pulled him towards her. Close up, she could smell the beer on him and realised that he and Bill must have carried on drinking long after they’d returned to their tent.
“You might hit the Muggles.” He stared at her, barely registering her words, then nodded. “Go and get Bill. Drag him back if you need to.”
“What about you?”
“I’m going to find Kingsley.”
“Tonks, you could get hurt,” he cried, and grabbed at her robe. “If Lucius Malfoy is there, he’ll recognise you, and you know what the Malfoys think of you and your family.”
She shook off his arm and glared at the pack. “It’s my job, Charlie. I don’t run.”
***
Remus looked up from the newspaper as Mary walked into the room, carrying a tray with two glasses and a bottle of wine.
“Are we celebrating something?” he queried as she poured him a drink.
“Having an empty house,” she replied, somewhat enigmatically.
“Demelza will be back at school next week,” he pointed out, shifting his legs so she could sit next to him on the sofa.
“Having an empty house and you in it,” she amended as she curled her legs under her and snuggled closer.
Remus smiled down at her. Folding the paper neatly in two, he placed it on the table and accepted the wine. “It’s good to be here,” he murmured, sighing slightly.
“You sound unsure,” she whispered. “Is everything all right?”
He lowered his head and touched his lips to her brow. “Job hunting,” he muttered. “It doesn’t get easier, even with a reference from Albus Dumbledore.”
“Ah,” she said, and sighed with him. “I could try and get you a job at the library...”
“I don’t think the Ministry are going to want me anywhere near any of their departments, no matter how far away I am from London,” he replied, grimacing.
“But with Professor Dumbledore’s reference...”
He took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. “Mary,” he soothed, “the Ministry think I helped Sirius escape. They were already dubious about Albus hiring me in the first place and when I transformed, that only confirmed their fears.”
“That’s preposterous! Everyone knows that you wouldn’t help Black. He murdered Lily and James.”
“No, he “”
Mary shook her head impatiently. “Semantics, Remus. He as good as killed them. He betrayed them to You-Know-Who.”
“No...” Remus took a deep breath. He had to tell her, had to trust Mary with the truth. “Mary, I need to talk to you about -”
A frantic banging at the door cut short his speech. “Mum, Mum, open up!” he heard Demelza shout from outside. “Mum, please, Martha’s hurt.”
Mary dropped her glass, the red wine splattering the carpet like blood, and ran to the door. In her anxiety, she fumbled on the catch, tugging at the door handle, unable to open it quickly enough. Remus could hear Demelza’s cries growing more and more frantic. Striding to the door, he assisted Mary, and looked on in horror as a bleeding Martha collapsed on the doormat.
“What’s happened?” Mary demanded. She took a shaking Demelza in her arms, held her tight, and tried to soothe the near-hysterical girl.
Remus shook his head. “Not sure.” Carefully he lifted Martha in his arms and carried her to the sofa. One side of her towelling dressing gown felt wet, which puzzled him because there had not been any rain for weeks now, but when he’d set her down and removed his hand, he saw it was covered in blood.
“I think she’s Splinched herself!” he cried. “Mary, is Demelza okay?”
“She’s fine,” Mary replied. “Melz, darling, go and get me the Essence of Dittany. It’s in the kitchen cupboard.”
Demelza didn’t move, her eyes round in horror at the sight of Martha writhing in pain.
“Demelza, now!” ordered Mary. Spinning around, she faced Martha. “Remus, keep Demelza occupied. She’s not good with blood.”
Without giving him a chance to reply, she pushed him aside and crouched down by Martha. Gently inching Martha’s pyjama bottoms off, she exposed the wound, all the while reassuring her sister that things would be fine, that it was nothing and she’d soon be free of pain.
Remus wasn’t so sure. Feeling useless, he walked to the kitchen where Demelza was frantically looking through the cupboards. “Accio Dittany!” he said quietly, and waited for the bottle to fly into his hand.
“Th-thank you,” Demelza muttered. “I couldn’t find it anywhere. Is Martha okay?”
“She will be,” he replied, wishing he felt as confident as he sounded. “I’m going to take this to your mum, and then come back in here. Could you make a pot of tea?”
She nodded and busied herself with the kettle, placing it carefully on the stove top and then using her wand to light the hob. She giggled, rather nervously. “I’m not supposed to do magic outside of school, am I?”
He smiled lopsidedly as he headed for the door. “Under the circumstances, Demelza, I don’t think anyone is going to mind. Besides, I’m not your professor anymore, so I’m not going to tell.”
When he returned, Demelza had poured out four mugs. She was sitting at the table, her hand clasped around one, warming herself on the piping hot drink. She looked less worried now, more determined and much more like the girl he remembered in his class.
“How’s Martha?”
“Recovering,” he replied softly. “Your mum knows her remedies. I remember she was always good at Herbology at school. Can you tell me what happened to Martha’s face?”
“Uh...” Demelza frowned. “It was a Stinging jinx, I think. We were asleep in the tent, and there was all this noise. Martha got up to see what the problem was, and then I heard her scream. When I got to her, she was curled up on the ground, holding her face. Then she grabbed me and started running towards the Death Eaters.”
“Death Eaters?” interrupted Mary from the doorway. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, yes, I’m sure. At least...”She paused and started frowning as if trying to remember exactly what she’d seen or heard. Then she looked at her mum with renewed determination in her eyes. “Yes, they were Death Eaters.”
“What on earth were they doing there?” Mary asked Remus. “Surely they were all rounded up?”
Remus pulled a face but said nothing, acutely aware that Demelza was hanging on his every word. “Someone’s idea of a joke, no doubt,” he replied neutrally.
“They’d caught some Muggles,” Demelza blurted out. He could see tears forming in her eyes, the terror of the night haunting her again. “They’d levitated them high in the air, and they were so scared. There was this little boy...and...and...and... I don’t know if he was alive, Mum. He looked all limp.”
Mary raced towards her daughter and hugged her fiercely. “You’re safe, Demelza, and the Muggles will be fine. I bet the Ministry and the Aurors will be fighting those idiots now. They’ll soon have things under control.”
Demelza sniffed. “Martha wanted to stay and help, really she did, but her face hurt too much and she decided it was for the best to get me home. I wish she’d waited, though. Tonks said she’d find her a Portkey, but Martha swore she could Apparate with me. I should have made her wait for Tonks.”
“Tonks?” Remus said, startled.
Out of the corner of his eyes, he noticed Mary looking at him strangely, frowning at some distant memory, perhaps trying to make connections. “She’s a friend,” he muttered quietly, and looked at Demelza. “She was there, was she?
“Yes,” Demelza replied, and something made her smile and start to wipe away her tears. “She was heading back towards the Death Eaters, helping the Weasleys, I think. She’s very brave, isn’t she?”
“Mmm,” Remus agreed. He looked at Mary, seeing an explanation was required. “She’s an Auror.”
Slowly, Mary released Demelza and leant across the table to pick up a mug of tea. Taking small sips, she stared into the distance.
“Martha introduced me,” Demelza said, and started giggling, unaware of the tension that had descended on the kitchen. “She is so cool, Mum. She’s a Metamorphmagus and can change her nose and hair and all sorts of things. And her boyfriend gave me some of his toffees.”
“Boyfriend?” Remus asked, before he could stop himself.
Demelza nodded. “Mmm, Fred and George’s brother.”
“Oh, Charlie Weasley,” Remus said, wondering why the news that she was back with Charlie surprised him. It was natural, after all. They were best friends, close in age, and he knew Charlie would take care of her. It was bound to happen one day. “He’s a dragon handler. I worked with him in Romania.”
Demelza shook her head. “No, it wasn’t Charlie. It was the oldest brother “ Bill.” She grinned at Mary. “He is seriously cool, Mum.”
“I’m sure he is,” Mary replied distantly. She smiled back at her daughter. “Melz, darling, will you take Martha a cup of tea? She’s much better now, although she was fretting that you’d been hurt, so go and reassure her you’re fine, please.”
Remus watched Demelza go, aware the whole time that Mary’s eyes were on him. He wondered what was going on in her head, but didn’t have to wait long to find out.
“Nymphadora Tonks, I remember now. Her mother’s a Black,” she stated, sounding deceptively mild. “So she’s related to him, isn’t she? I’m surprised she was allowed to be an Auror.”
“If by him, you mean Sirius, then yes, she is related to him,” Remus replied slowly.
“I find it odd that you still call him by his first name,” she said. “After the funeral you only referred to him as Black. But now...” Mary paused and slowly placed her mug back on the table. “It’s as if you’ve forgiven him.”
Remus placed both of his hands on the table, fingering the tablecloth. This really was not the right time to tell her the truth, not with her sister lying on the couch, having been injured by Death Eaters. Mary had lost as much as he had the night James and Lily had died. With Lily gone, she’d lost her best friend. They had been a close-knit pair, confiding everything in each other. He wondered briefly what would have happened to her if she hadn’t had Demelza to pull her from the abyss of grief.
“No,” he replied. “I haven’t forgiven him.” Then Remus leant over and took her hands in his. There was nothing to forgive, Mary. Sirius never betrayed James. It was Peter, was what he wanted to say, but now was not the time.
***
After the event, it was obvious that the Death Eaters had planned to cause trouble. Although the Ministry’s line was that a few wizards had got rowdy and thought they were playing a prank, Kingsley remained sceptical. As he said to Tonks, there was no way this parade had been arranged on the spur of the moment.
“Your reflexes are excellent,” Kingsley said, smiling warmly as they wandered back towards two figures sitting in the clearing. His face was bloodied where he’d been hit by a jinx, but she’d escaped unscathed.
“Thanks,” she muttered, picking her way through the burnt tents. She looked to the sky. Although the Dark Mark had dissipated into the atmosphere, the fear amongst the campers remained. “Wish we’d caught them.”
“We will,” Kingsley replied grimly. He stopped walking and pointed out one of the figures. “Is that Bill Weasley?”
“Mmm, and Charlie. Looks like they’ve both been hurt.”
Kingsley placed an arm across her shoulders. “Go and see to them, Tonks, then go back to your tent and try to get some sleep. We don’t need you anymore tonight.”
Tonks nodded, pleased with the reprieve. She hadn’t been sleeping well in the tent and was exhausted, yet she was proud for acquitting herself so well in the fight.
“Hi guys,” she called, raising her hand to them. “How are you both?”
Charlie looked up at her, gingerly touching his bloody nose. He had a ghost of a smile on his face. “This is nothing,” he replied. “You should see me after Norberta’s had a go.”
Bill stared at her. “You all right?”
“Mmm,” she replied, and sat down on the grass between them. Bill was clutching a cloth to his arm, and she could see the blood seeping through his fingers, dripping onto the ground. “That looks nasty.”
“I’ll live,” he muttered, wincing when she tried to unfurl his fingers. “Don’t touch.”
“Bill,” she said, ignoring him. “I’m pretty good with wounds, you know. Part of my training. Let me have a look.”
“I’m fine,” he snapped.
“Bill, don’t be so sodding rude!” Charlie growled. “Tonks is trying to help, and that cut’s beyond me.” He stood up and scanned the woods. “Can you take care of him? I want to find the others. Just box his ears or threaten his hair if he plays up. That’s what Mum does.” His attempt at a joke fell flat, betraying how worried he was about his family.
As Charlie ran back to the woods, Bill groaned and closed his eyes. “Sorry, I shouldn’t take it out on you. Just feel a bit stupid, that’s all. I didn’t exactly do well in there.”
Tonks shrugged and carefully peeled back the blood-soaked cloth. She studied the wound. It wasn’t that deep but it was wide, and it looked as if he’d lost some of his skin. “You were there and fighting, that’s what counts.”
“What’s the verdict, Healer Tonks?” Bill muttered.
“I think you’ll survive, Mr Weasley. It’s a good job that’s not your wand arm, though. It’s going to be sore for a while.” Tonks wrapped the cloth back around his arm. “I’ve got some salve back in my tent; it’s very good for that type of injury.”
She stood up, intent on fetching it, but Bill tugged on her arm. “Stay a while,” he murmured. “Just until I stop feeling light-headed and can get back to my tent.”
“Bill Weasley, please do not tell me a big boy like you is scared of the dark!” she said, chuckling at him.
“No,” he said simply. “It’s only that we’ve spent a good part of the day together, and...” He paused and then smiled faintly at her. “I like your company, Tonks, and you’re a great distraction from the pain.”
Resting his uninjured arm across her shoulders, he pulled her closer. “If it wasn’t for my brother,” he whispered, “I would have made a move on you by now.”
“Really?”
Pulling away slightly, Bill smiled. “You sound so surprised, but what’s not to like? You’re brave, smart and funny. Just my type of witch, if only ...” He sighed.
“Charlie,” she finished, a note of faint regret in her voice.
“Yep,” he agreed. “And I’m not convinced you want to go out with me, either.”
She considered him carefully, and then pulled away, hugging her knees up to her chest. “I nearly lost Charlie’s friendship once. I won’t risk that again, Bill. He means too much to me.”
“But not enough to go out with him.”
Tonks shook her head. “My mum once told me that Dad made her ‘heart sing’. I always thought she was mad, telling me a story to make their marriage sound romantic.” She laughed softly, more to herself than Bill. “Poor Mum, she wanted a girl so badly, and ended up with this odd Metamorphmagus who would rather climb trees than play with dolls.”
“And Charlie doesn’t make your ‘heart sing’?” Bill murmured.
She said nothing, looking far into the distance. After a while, she turned back to Bill, wistfully wondering why she couldn’t forget everything and just have some fun. Then she looked at the sky and watched as the waxing moon started its descent. “Only one person ever has, but I’ve lost him.”
End Notes:
I know you're sick of my apologies for the tardiness. Let's just say I have too many writing commitments and need to get a plan (or three) in action. Hope you're still here ...
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.