---

“Congratulations, Sirius, you’ve truly outdone yourself this time: it’s the most barmpot idea you’ve ever had!� Remus announced. He felt this was saying something as Sirius had come up with some fairly terrible schemes over the years. The fiasco with the mutated tarantulas and the Hufflepuff Quidditch team wouldn’t even compare to this new brainstorm Sirius had just shared. When Padfoot had asked Moony and Wormtail to meet him in the privacy of their dormitory while Prongs was away at Quidditch practice, Moony had worried, and apparently his worrying was fully justified.

“You just don’t see it for the stroke of genius that it is,� Sirius replied confidently, leaning back on his bed with his arms crossed behind his head. “Besides, what would you suggest we get Prongs for Christmas this year? A book?�

Remus took the opportunity to throw a copy of Hogwarts: A History at Sirius who managed to duck it without difficulty. Remus then resumed his protest of this new and moronic scheme. “First off, even if we did agree to this… for lack of a better word… plan of yours, it will never, in a million years, work.�

“Nonsense,� Sirius replied, airily waving away Remus’s protests with his hand. “Even Wormtail can see that this plan is pure gold, right?�

Peter hadn’t wanted to get involved in the argument and didn’t like to be put on the spot. He diplomatically replied, “Well, I don’t see how it could hurt to have a Christmas party.�

“Have you read the Daily Prophet lately?� Remus replied, waving an old copy that he’d left on his nightstand. “Things are getting worse by the day.�

“All the more reason to cheer people up a bit,� Sirius countered, “And what better way to do that than by throwing a party?�

“It’s not safe to just invite people we barely know into our homes,� Remus reminded his friend.

“Which is why I only invited twenty or thirty of our most intimate acquaintances,� Sirius answered grinning widely.

Remus narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean ‘invited’?�

“I believe it’s the past tense of courteously requesting the presence of an individual or individuals to an event,� Sirius replied coolly. He then winked at Peter. “Looks like we should get Moony a dictionary for his gift.�

Peter snickered in reply, but Remus ignored him, instead focusing on his pillock of a friend. “Do you mean to tell me that you’ve already invited people to this party?�

Sirius nodded with an infuriating smile on his face. “I expect your invitation will arrive any day now.�

“I already got mine,� Peter added brightly, pulling a festive piece of parchment out of his school bag.

“I assume you cleared your schedule,� Sirius added pleasantly.

Peter nodded in reply. Remus decided to abandon his argument that Sirius had recently inherited a one bedroom house with unreliable plumbing in the middle of nowhere which by no stretch of the imagination could hold twenty to thirty people. “Even if you do host this party, Evans won’t agree to go. It’s even more dangerous for Muggleborns than the rest of us these days.�

“Maybe it would make her feel a bit better to be invited to a party,� Peter suggested quietly while looking at the floor. He remembered his early school days, before Hogwarts, and how it felt to be the only one not invited to a party. He would never admit to anyone, especially his friends, how small it made him feel to see everyone else receive one of the little invitations. This year he’d received invitations to three Christmas parties, but had noted that the usually popular Head Girl had only received Sirius’s thus far. His cheeks slightly pink, Peter continued, “She might be feeling a bit lonely right now.�

Remus considered this point. He knew that while many of Lily’s friends remained loyal to her, their families likely wouldn’t want to welcome Lily into their midst while Lord Voldemort was clearly targeting Muggleborns.

“No one should feel lonely at Christmas,� Sirius added rather gruffly.

It then dawned on Remus that since Sirius had moved out of the Potters and into his own house, he too would be missing his friends over Christmas. Only then did it occur to him that this party might not be solely for James’s benefit. “Fine. I will help you throw a Christmas party, but under no circumstances are we going to play matchmaker. You’ll only get James’s hopes up and annoy Evans. It would take a miracle to get those two together.�

“Excellent!� Sirius replied, rubbing his hands together. “We’ll have a huge all out Christmas party. We’ll have a goose, mince meat pies, a tree, stockings, the works. Remus, you’ll be in charge of the music. Peter, you can take care of the cooking and James can look after the decorating.�

“And what will that leave you to do?� Remus asked, temporarily ignoring the fact that he wasn’t aware of Peter ever having cooked anything and James was partially colour-blind.

“Well, I’ve already sent out the invitations, so I’ll spend the rest of my time orchestrating the required miracle to get our two turtledoves together.�

“Your selective hearing is uncanny,� Remus replied dryly. “You are not going to ruin this party with some childish attempt to get James and Lily together.�

“Oh don’t get your knickers in a twist,� Sirius replied airily. “Besides, I can hardly make a worse job of it than Prongs already has.�

---

Remus was busy setting up his gramophone in the cramped living room. Having a Muggle grandfather who had earned his living as a music teacher, Remus was well acquainted with both Muggle and wizarding music and had an extensive record collection. Peter was already acquainted with a great deal of Muggle music as well, but both James and Sirius had only become familiar with it as a result of Remus’s influence. Occasionally Remus suspected this was the sum total of influence he had over Sirius; James was often the only person who could change Sirius’s mind.

Out of the corner of his eye Remus could see James putting brown and green baubles on the Christmas tree. A faint hissing could be heard from the kitchen, followed by Peter reprimanding, “No, Gustave! Ouch! Naughty goose!�

“Gustave?� wondered Remus, looking at James in puzzlement.

“No, no, NO!� Sirius barked. “Wormtail, you numpty! I don’t want you to name it, I want you to cook it!�

James and Remus looked at each other and sniggered.

“I was just stuffing him first,� Peter replied defensively. “Have some more bread Gustave. That’s a good goose.�

Remus and James exchanged another glance. Apparently Sirius was roughly as knowledgeable a cook as Peter, as this argument seemed to appease him. No one bothered to point out that Gustave was supposed to be stuffed post mortem, as this would likely only make them responsible for executing, stuffing and then roasting Gustave.

Sirius had surprised everyone with the level of energy he’d thrown into his party. He had badgered Remus to give him copies to the lyrics of several popular Muggle Christmas songs as well as access to his record collection. Sirius had then spent the remainder of the school term waking most of Gryffindor Tower up by blasting Christmas music. He’d seemed especially fond of God Rest Ye Merry Hippogrifs and the Muggle song, Baby, It’s Cold Outside.

After the third morning of waking everyone up with Christmas music, the Headmaster had politely requested Sirius’s presence in his office. This wasn’t particularly unusual; each of the four Marauders had spent more than what they considered their fair share of time in the offices of Professor Dumbledore, Professor McGonagall, and Filch, who’s office was more or less a dungeon. Remus had no idea what transpired between Sirius and Dumbledore, but their little chat hadn’t had the effect the majority of the Hogwarts’ residents had desired; the following morning Let The House Elves Sing was also added to the mix. Remus was at a complete loss as to how this had happened as he didn’t even own a record with that particular song on it.

Once school was out, Sirius’s enthusiasm hadn’t waned. He had put together an elaborate menu, found a shapely Christmas tree, and even gone to the trouble of trying to learn about Muggle Christmas traditions. Remus would never admit it to Sirius, but thus far the Christmas party was looking like it might have been a good idea after all. Then the doorbell rang.

“Is it Evans?� James asked, looking hopeful while quickly ruffling his hair.

“I don’t know and for Merlin’s sake, stop playing with your hair! She hates it when you do that!� Remus hissed.

However, Remus’s warning turned out to be of little consequence as it wasn’t Lily at the door. Instead, it was Mary MacDonald and Caradoc Dearborn. The couple pitched in and helped James finish up with the decorations. Mary used a Colour Change Charm to turn the brown ornaments red while James had his back turned.

It wasn’t long before Sirius came in and surveyed their handiwork. “Not bad… not bad at all…�

“I’d like to see you do better,� James huffed, while proudly surveying his handiwork. The tree was festooned with baubles and candles. He’d hung four stockings, bearing the nicknames ‘Padfoot’, ‘Moony’, ‘Wormtail’ and ‘Prongs’ by the fire. When Sirius had asked him to decorate, James hadn’t realized he was also agreeing to clean up the mess that Sirius had somehow managed to create in the week since they’d left Hogwarts. He’d prided himself on the novel idea of simply wrapping various piles of debris with brightly coloured paper and then stashing them under the tree for Sirius to unwrap at his leisure. Prongs dearly hoped Padfoot would be surprised come Christmas morning when he discovered that his laundry hadn’t been done after all. Sirius was now squinting at the angel sitting atop the tree which, unbeknownst to him, had originally been one of his dirty old socks until James had taken the trouble of Transfiguring it.

“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything, Prongs, but it is missing something,� Sirius replied looking about the room. “Weren’t you supposed to have decked the halls with holly and ivy and such?� He then raised his eyebrows suggestively before adding, “And mistletoe?�

Before anyone had a chance to interrupt, Sirius waved his wand and greenery started appearing about the room. Remus smiled to himself; Sirius had always had a flair for Transfiguration. Nevertheless, at the first opportunity he quietly reminded Padfoot, “A few sprigs of mistletoe aren’t going to change Lily’s mind.�

Sirius only smiled his most infuriating smile and replied, “I completely agree. A few sprigs won’t do it.�

The doorbell then rang and Sirius hurried off to answer it, leaving Remus with a very bad feeling. Subtlety had never been Sirius’s strong suit. Neither was common sense.

This time a larger group of guests had arrived. Remus could see Alicia Fawcett, a pretty sixth year Ravenclaw whom Remus had fancied for some time, had arrived with her friends Rachel Moody and Artemis Lovegood.

Peter had just finished putting away their cloaks when Emmeline Smith and her fiancé David Vance arrived. Sirius’s little house was already beginning to feel cramped and the room was becoming a bit too warm. Remus couldn’t help but wonder how many more people Sirius had invited. He had been hoping that twenty had been an exaggeration. Then the Gryffindor Quidditch team arrived, except James of course, as he was already there.

“Sirius!� Remus hissed. “How many people did you invite?�

“Like I said before: somewhere between twenty and thirty. Oh! And I told some of them that they could bring a friend.�

“And where do you plan to put them all?� Remus asked in disbelief.

Sirius shrugged. “You worry too much, Moony. These things have a way of working themselves out.�

“No, they don’t,� Remus argued, noting that fellow Gryffindors, Victoria Williams and Ellen Peasegood, had just arrived. This seemed odd to Remus as he would have expected Lily to arrive with her best friend, Victoria. He couldn’t help but wonder if this meant that all of Sirius’s scheming had been for nothing and Lily wouldn’t be coming after all.

“I meant I have every confidence that you’ll think of something,� Sirius clarified, while looking somewhere over Remus’s shoulder. “You might want to put your thinking cap on; I think the Hufflepuff prefects just arrived.�

“You invited the Hufflepuff prefects?� Remus repeated, unable to fathom why Sirius had felt the need to invite people who typically landed them in detention.

“Christmas is a time for love and forgiveness,� Sirius replied crisply. “Besides, I figured it would be good to have them around in case their Quidditch team gets rowdy.�

“Because you also invited the Hufflepuff Quidditch team,� Remus finished wearily.

“Well, it would be rude not to after having invited the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw teams, besides, I felt it would help smooth over that rather nasty incident with those mutant spiders,� Sirius explained.

“Of course,� Remus replied in an utterly defeated tone. Now he simply had to find a way to either make Sirius’s house larger or his guests smaller.

“You know, Remus, everyone seems to be enjoying themselves. You really ought to lighten up,� Sirius called back over his shoulder.

Only then did it occur to Remus that it really wasn’t his responsibility to ensure that Sirius’s party went according to plan. In fact, he was tired of being the responsible Marauder.

Just then, the doorbell rang again. Sirius bounded up to the door and threw it wide open. “Evans! Glad you could make it!�

Lily looked somewhat out of place as Sirius ushered her into his now packed home. She held up a dish and told him, “I brought some gingerbread.�

“Excellent! Now if Wormtail completely flubs the cooking we’ll still have something to eat!�

Lily smiled somewhat mechanically as Sirius showed her through to the living room. Remus couldn’t help but notice that Victoria Williams suddenly seemed to find Harold Greengrass to be extremely interesting when Lily entered the room. He wondered if Peter had been right about Lily feeling a bit ostracized over being Muggleborn. He, Peter, Sirius and James had all been to the Williams’ Christmas party a few days earlier and James had pointed out that Lily hadn’t been there. Lily and Victoria had been friendly for years, and Remus hated to think that Lily hadn’t been invited simply because she didn’t have wizard parents. Then again, he reminded himself, for all he knew Lily had been invited and couldn’t make it.

James, ever on the lookout for Lily Evans, began to mess up his hair. Unfortunately, the room was a good deal more crowded than the previous time he had done so and he was now standing precariously close to one of the tree’s candles. No one was prepared for the high pitched scream that erupted from James as he realized that his prized hair was smoking. Fortunately, Artemis Lovegood quickly used an Extinguishing Spell and most of his hair was saved.

Remus was watching from across the crowded room. He could have sworn he’d seen a smile momentarily twitch on Lily’s lips when James had panicked. James was blushing deeply as he hurried out of the room, not even pausing to thank the attractive brunette who’d rescued his hair. Remus couldn’t help but note that James now seemed to have a bald patch at the back of his head. This thought was interrupted by Sirius appearing at his elbow. Remus felt mildly gratified to see that Sirius wasn’t quite his usual suave and confident self. “Have you figured out what to do about this crowd yet? Nick and half the Slug Club’s just arrived.�

Remus serenely surveyed his friend before informing him, “Well, you could make the room bigger….�

“Brilliant Moony!� Sirius exclaimed. As far as Remus knew, Sirius had never magically enlarged a room before. The regular Remus would have pointed out that Sirius had no idea what he was doing. Festive Remus simply raised a bottle of Butterbeer and stood back to survey the damage.

Remus had to admit to himself that he was impressed. The room had trembled and shaken a good deal, most of the glass baubles James had carefully hung were now smashed to bits, but overall, the room enlargement did seem to have worked. Then James entered the room. He was now thoroughly soaked and didn’t look terribly pleased. Remus couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen James look so flustered.

“Sirius, did you just enlarge the room?� James asked quietly.

“Yes, I think it went really well for a first attempt,� Sirius replied, still happily surveying his work. He then turned to James. “What the Hell happened to you?�

“Funny you should ask,� James replied dryly. “I was in the lav trying to see how much of my hair burnt off when suddenly there was something like an earthquake and half the pipes burst.�

“Ah, sorry ‘bout that, mate,� Sirius replied, obviously trying to suppress a laugh. From across the room, Lily was also doing her best to stifle her giggles. “Remus how about you fix the pipes and I’ll lend James some clean clothes?�

“Why do you think I would know the first thing about fixing them?� Remus inquired.

Sirius simply shrugged and wandered off with the sopping wet James, telling him, “Not to worry Prongs, this will give me a good way to start off Operation: Mistletoe.�

Remus suspected he already knew what Operation: Mistletoe entailed, even though Sirius had failed to go over the finer points with him. The ceiling was practically crawling with the stuff and already a few couples were making use of it. Apparently the acrid smell of burnt hair wasn’t enough to put them off.

“I can give you a hand, if you want,� Lily offered, casually wandering over.

Remus’s eyebrows shot up. “Not that I wouldn’t mind the help, but what do you know about plumbing?�

Lily shrugged and grinned. “At least as much as you.�

“Well, the more the merrier,� Remus replied cheerfully. He’d always enjoyed Lily’s company and certainly didn’t want to appear to be snubbing her.

The pair made their way to the toilet and Remus cautiously opened the door before slamming it shut again. “I don’t think you should go in there, Lily.�

“I was thinking that a Scouring Charm or two, quickly followed by a Freezing Charm might do the trick,� Lily suggested.

“Quite possibly,� Remus agreed. “However, the Hufflepuff Keeper is currently being sick in there.�

Sirius then seemed to appear out of thin air. Remus had always wondered how Sirius had managed to acquire such a talent, not to mention the even more impressive one of being able to disappear into thin air upon sighting McGonagall or Filch. “Shame on you, Remus! Asking Lily to help clean up this mess...�

Remus began to protest, but Sirius interrupted him. “I’ll assist you in clearing this up. Evans, would you mind giving James his glasses back? He must have lost them when the pipes burst.� Sirius explained, picking them up off the floor. Remus could have sworn they hadn’t been there before Sirius’s arrival. In fact, he was reasonably certain that James had been wearing his glasses the last time Remus had seen him.

“I don’t mind helping Remus, really,� Lily began.

Sirius, however, had already put the glasses in her hand and turned her back around. “Thanks, Evans!� he called out after her.

“So how are you planning on cleaning this up?� Moony asked, having no intention of helping Sirius further.

Sirius pointed his wand at the door. “Colloportus!� He then grinned at Remus. “Problem solved. Now let’s go watch Evans meet Prongs under the mistletoe! I already told him to wait for her underneath a bunch of it.�

“You can’t actually believe that will work,� Remus grumbled.

“Trust me, Moony. Everything is going according to plan,� Sirius replied confidently. Remus didn’t bother to inquire where giving James a bald spot or bursting half the pipes had factored into Sirius’s grand scheme.

They arrived in the living room just in time to see Artemis Lovegood approach James, with his glasses in her hand. They were even close enough to hear him request a kiss, while pointing at the greenery over his head. Artemis acquiesced.

“Was that part of your plan?� Remus asked, wondering if James had lost his mind.

“What does that berk think he’s doing?� Sirius grumbled.

James, who was now wearing his glasses, appeared very red-faced and was heading their way. “What are you playing at Sirius?� he demanded.

“Me? You’re the one who just kissed Lovegood in front of Evans!� Sirius replied, clearly annoyed.

“I thought she was Evans!� James hissed. “You told me Evans would meet me under that bunch of mistletoe and I’m half-blind without my glasses so when a girl walked up…�

“That’s ridiculous, Prongs,� Sirius argued. “I don’t care how fuzzy the world might have appeared, surely at some point in the past seven years you managed to notice that Evans is a ginger?�

Remus suddenly understood and started to laugh. His two friends simply stared at him in puzzlement until he was finally able to say, “Sirius, surely even you have noticed that James can’t tell red from orange from brown?�

Sirius’s eyes narrowed. “Tell Wormtail we’re moving on to Operation: Christmas Cookie.�

---

“What exactly is Operation: Christmas Cookie?� Remus asked suspiciously.

“Sorry, Moony. Strictly a need to know basis,� Sirius called back over his shoulder. “Just give Wormtail the message.�

Remus had no intention whatsoever of being Sirius Black’s personal message service. He also decided that the Hufflepuff Keeper could take care of Sirius’s plumbing problem when he felt up to it. The newly liberated festive Remus then went in search of Alicia Fawcett, only to find that she was snogging a Hufflepuff Beater underneath some of Sirius’s mistletoe.

Casting about for something - anything - else to look at, Remus instead decided to focus on a bunch of mistletoe hanging closer to him, without any amorous couples underneath it. Only then did Remus note that while the plant did have white berries, the leaves didn’t look the way he remembered them; they looked more like blackberry leaves but without the thorns on the stems. He couldn’t recall ever having seen a plant quite like the one Sirius had so casually created.

“What are you looking at?� Lily asked.

“I was… never mind…� Remus mumbled. He hoped Lily hadn’t seen him gawking at Alicia and her new beau. He frantically cast about for a different topic of conversation. “How did Artemis Lovegood end up with James’s glasses?�

Lily shrugged. “I saw him standing under a bushel of mistletoe and asked the nearest girl if she’d mind returning Potter’s glasses to him. Why, was it some clever plot to get me under the mistletoe with him?�

Remus couldn’t help but smile. “Wouldn’t have been a very subtle plan, would it?� A thought then occurred to him. “Lily… you didn’t happen to be aware of the fact that James is partially colour-blind?�

“No, I had no idea,� she replied a bit too quickly before changing the topic. “You lot must already be regretting inviting the Hufflepuff Quidditch team.�

“What makes you say that?� he asked.

“Well, the Keeper who’s being sick, the Beater who’s kissing Fawcett, and the Seeker who’s being chased by… is that a goose? Anyway, he’s about to knock over the tree.�

A loud crash confirmed Lily’s prediction, but Remus was more focused on an earlier part of her statement than the fact that his Christmas dinner appeared to be running amok throughout the house. “What makes you think I’d care who Fawcett kisses?�

Lily smiled knowingly. “I saw you staring. It’s all right Remus; your secret’s safe with me.� She grimaced a bit before adding, “Especially since you seem to be one of the only people here who will chat with me for more than five minutes before remembering that they need to get another bottle of Butterbeer.�

Remus looked at her in sympathy. “I’m sure they’ll come around. We’ve all known you for years and you know that you have friends here. You can always talk to me, Peter, Sirius… I suspect you’ve already realized that James would be thrilled if you were to acknowledge his existence…�

Lily blushed slightly as Remus continued his list. “You could talk to that group of Hufflepuff girls… well, it might be more that you could giggle with them, I’m not sure they actually talk much…�

As if on cue, the group of fifth years burst into a chorus of giggling. Remus was still wondering how they’d ended up at the party as he seriously doubted their host knew any of their names. He continued to scan the room for friendly faces. “Oh, and don’t forget Harold Greengrass: I think he’ll talk to anyone about Herbology as long as they stand still long enough…�

“Lupin!� Lily chastised, clearly worried that Harold would overhear.

Remus grinned back at her before saying, “I’m just trying to make the point that any number of people would be happy to talk to you.�

“I know,� Lily sighed. “Trust me, these past few months have really shown me who my real friends are.� She looked over towards Victoria and added in a softer tone. “Though, I suppose I can’t blame them for wanting to keep their families safe.�

“I’m sure you and Williams will smooth this over,� Remus told her. “She’s probably just too embarrassed to talk to you because her parents wouldn’t let her invite you over.�

“Thanks, Remus,� Lily replied, brightening up a bit. She looked over towards Victoria again. “Maybe you’re right.�

Unable to help himself, he pretended to look at his watch, “Goodness! Look at the time! I think I need another bottle of Butterbeer…�

Lily swatted his arm but laughed anyway. “You had better be careful, Lupin, or I might not keep that little secret about you staring at Miss Fawcett.�

“I’ll have you know that I wasn’t staring at her, instead I was wondering if this stuff is really mistletoe,� Remus replied stiffly. He could feel his face growing warm but hoped the plant would be a sufficient distraction. It definitely would have distracted Greengrass.

“Are you implying the guests have been kissing under false pretences?� Lily asked coyly.

“What’s all this about kissing?� Sirius asked as he pulled James with him into the conversation.

“We were just speculating on if this stuff you claim is mistletoe, is in fact the real thing,� Lily replied impishly.

James grabbed a bunch of it. “Looks like mistletoe to me,� he announced in the deepest voice he could manage.

“I don’t know,� Lily added, examining it more closely. “I think Remus is right. It doesn’t look like how I remember mistletoe… the leaves aren’t right.�

“That is perfectly good mistletoe and I will thank you to stop disparaging my hard work,� Sirius informed them in mock haughtiness.

“No, I really don’t think it is,� Remus argued, once again examining the white berries and pointed leaves. “They look more like leaves you’d find on brambles.�

“They do, don’t they?� Lily agreed, clearly enjoying herself. “I’m sorry, Black. This is obviously sub-standard mistletoe; you’ll have to inform everyone to stop snogging.�

“Care to make a wager?� Sirius asked.

Lily blinked in surprise. “What sort of wager?� she asked suspiciously.

“Well, if you’re so confident about this not being mistletoe then I think we should ask Harold Greengrass over there. He’s top notch at Herbology so we’ll agree that his ruling is final. When he says that it is in fact mistletoe, you have to kiss James here underneath it.�

Red spots appeared on Lily’s cheeks and she quickly looked at Remus. He could only shrug in reply. He wasn’t that good at Herbology and didn’t know for certain who was right.

“Fine,� Lily agreed, her eyes sparkling. “But when he says that Remus and I are right, you and Potter will have to sing a duet for all your guests.� Lily then offered her hand to Sirius. “Deal?�

“Deal!� Sirius replied, brimming with confidence, and completely ignoring that James’s face had fallen upon hearing the word ‘sing’. “Oi! Greengrass! We need your expert opinion over here!�

Harold Greengrass soon made his way over. Sirius was grinning hugely. “Greengrass! Would you mind identifying this plant for us?�

James held up the debated plant and Harold looked it over carefully before exclaiming, “That’s amazing! I’ve only ever read about them before; they aren’t native to Britain… but shouldn’t you be using gloves to hold it?�

“What are you rambling on about?� Sirius demanded. “It’s mistletoe!�

Harold started to laugh. “That’s definitely not mistletoe. I’m fairly certain it’s poison ivy.�

James dropped it and yelped, “You’ve poisoned me!�

Harold quickly explained, “Actually, you’ll just get a very itchy rash in about a week. However, you really ought to get rid of that stuff. Oh, and don’t burn it, that’ll just inflame your lungs too.�

Remus looked at James with sympathy. Lily seemed to be having a coughing fit and excused herself, followed by Harold who was now lecturing her on the many differences between mistletoe and poison ivy.

James then turned to Sirius, “It’s not that I don’t appreciate your help, Padfoot, but at this rate I’ll be lucky if I survive your Christmas party.�

Sirius patted him on the back reassuringly. “Not to worry, Prongs. Forget the mistletoe, or poison ivy, or whatever it is. Wormtail and I are about to move on to a better plan.�

“That’s what I was afraid of,� James groaned. He added in a much quieter voice, “I can’t sing.�

“I know,� Sirius informed him. James enjoyed singing; as of yet, no one particularly enjoyed listening to him. “However,� Sirius continued, “I anticipated this might happen, and have a solution.�

“You anticipated losing a bet to Evans regarding the authenticity of your mistletoe and having to perform a Christmas carol with James?� Remus asked skeptically.

“Of course not, I’d have come top in Divination if I had foreseen that… and probably would have created actual mistletoe. I just thought it might be useful to make sure Prongs has a singing voice tonight.�

Out of the corner of his eye, Remus noticed Gustave, the large gray goose waddle behind the threadbare sofa.

“Perhaps you two can discuss which song you’d like to perform while fixing the tree,� Remus suggested.

“And where are you going?� Sirius asked.

“I’m just going to see if Peter needs any help in the kitchen,� Remus replied serenely. In reality he simply planned on getting himself another Butterbeer and hopefully discovering what Wormtail was up to. He obviously wasn’t cooking the goose; thus, he was most likely working on the mysterious Operation: Christmas Cookie.

He slipped into the kitchen only to find Peter quietly reading a potion’s instructions aloud to himself, “Add three drops to food to cause the intended person to become infatuated with…�

Remus nearly lost his temper then and there. He couldn’t believe Peter and Sirius would stoop to giving Lily a love potion. Neither could he imagine that James would have agreed to it. Peter still hadn’t noticed him, and Remus quickly slipped back out, leaving the door open only a crack.

Peter didn’t hear him and continued, “Side effects may include excessive giggling, dry-mouth and Freudian-slips. Do not attempt to Apparate long distances if…�

Remus then watched Peter open the potion bottle over a plate of cookies. He couldn’t tell which cookie Peter had put the potion on though, as Peter had his back to the door. Once he had finished, Remus made his entrance.

“M-moony! What are you doing in the kitchen?� Peter asked nervously, while guiltily stepping in front of the newly tainted platter of cookies.

Remus smiled pleasantly. “I just thought I’d grab another Butterbeer and see how the cooking was coming along.�

The stove had four pots on it, all but one of them boiling over; the fourth was smoking and creating a smell that was roughly as pleasant as that of James’s burnt hair. Remus also couldn’t help but notice that he’d walked into a rather large sticky spot on the floor and that there were eggshells and syrup on the countertop. He suspected his own mother might faint if she ever saw her own kitchen in such a state.

“It’s coming along really well!� Peter replied, tossing Remus a Butterbeer before attempting to usher him back out of the kitchen. “It might look a bit disorganized right now… but really, I have everything under control.�

“Really? Because the last time I saw Gustave, he was headed for Sirius’s bedroom,� Remus replied. “Shouldn’t he go in the oven soon?�

“I suppose,� Peter replied, gulping nervously.

Remus offered, “I can look after all this while you go catch him.�

“Maybe you could catch him instead?� Peter suggested hopefully.

“Wormtail, you almost make it sound as though you’re trying to keep me out of the kitchen,� Remus replied lightly.

“No, no, of course not!� Peter hastily answered. “I’ll just run off and get Gustave… You’ll look after all this while I’m gone?�

“Of course!� Remus answered pleasantly, waving to Wormtail. As soon as Wormtail was out the door, he pocketed what was left of the love potion. He was slightly horrified to see that the tiny bottle was nearly half empty. How much of the stuff had Wormtail used? Ideally, Remus would simply have thrown out the offending cookie; however, he still had no idea which of them was actually tainted. Now he needed to get rid of the entire platter of gingerbread cookies.

Suddenly struck by inspiration, Remus popped back out of the kitchen and hurried over to the sofa he’d last seen Gustave hiding behind. Remus was painfully aware that Alicia Fawcett was staring at him as though he was a nutter as he got down on his hands and knees in an effort to cajole the Christmas goose out from behind the furniture.

“Gustave? Come here, goose… Come on Gustave…�

Gustave wasn’t having any of it. He hissed and snapped at Remus, who realized that sweet-talking his dinner into coming out was about as likely to work as one of Sirius’s schemes. Instead, he withdrew his wand, aimed it at dinner and muttered, “Petrificus Totalus! Accio Gustave!�

With all the dignity he could muster, Remus then put the frozen goose under his arm and marched back into the kitchen. He didn’t dare make eye contact with Alicia. Once back in the safety of the kitchen, Remus lifted the jinx and proceeded to feed the entire plate of gingerbread cookies to the greedy Christmas goose.

“I couldn’t find Gustave anywhere!� Peter announced upon his return.

“Not to worry: he found me,� Remus replied, gesturing to the large goose on the floor.

Wormtail’s expression changed momentarily. “That’s… that’s great Moony. I’ll just… have him in the pot in a couple of ticks.�

“He ate a plate of cookies,� Remus mentioned casually. “Extra stuffing, right?�

Wormtail looked even more uncomfortable than before, but forced a large smile. “Right!�

“I’ll get out of your way,� Remus offered before he excused himself. As he left, he could hear Gustave frantically honking.

Remus then went in search of James. He ought to know what Operation: Christmas Cookie had actually comprised of. Besides, James was the only one who’d ever been able to make Sirius listen to reason.

It took Remus some time to find James and Sirius, mainly as he had expected them to be out socializing. Instead, they were holed up in Sirius’s bedroom, scribbling on a piece of parchment.

“Moony!� James exclaimed upon Remus’s entrance. “Just the chap we need! What rhymes with ‘snake’?�

“Er… ‘lake’, ‘break’, ‘fake’, any number of words… Why do you ask?� Remus hardly thought this was the time to compose a poem for Lily. He also doubted the romantic nature of a poem that Sirius was helping with, especially if they needed a rhyme for ‘snake’.

“It’s all your fault, Moony, so you really ought to help with this,� Sirius informed him. A few of the witches in Sirius’s posters nodded in agreement, though the ones of Muggle girls remained still.

“How is any of this my fault?� Remus asked hotly, while trying to ignore the distracting posters; he wasn’t about to let the love potion incident slide.

“You had to play Herbology expert and falsify my mistletoe!� Sirius explained, as though Remus were being especially thick. “So the least you could do now is help us write the song we’re going to perform.�

“First, I think we need to discuss your Operation: Christmas Cookie,� Remus replied. He turned to James, “Did you know they were planning on giving Evans a love potion?�

“WHAT?� James spluttered, dropping the quill he’d been writing with and dripping ink splotches all over the carpet.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Moony,� Sirius replied arrogantly. “We weren’t going to slip Evans a love potion.�

“Then what were you planning on doing with the love potion I found in the kitchen?�

“We were going to give a little bit of it to all the other girls at the party,� Sirius explained.

Remus and James simply stared at Sirius.

“Wormtail figured if we gave a very mild love potion to the other girls at the party, they’d talk James up… you know, tell Lily what a great guy he is… maybe even make her a bit jealous.�

Remus still didn’t think this was one of Peter’s better ideas, but he had to admit, it wasn’t anywhere near as bad as he’d suspected. “You still can’t be going around giving love potions to…�

Sirius waved away Remus’s protests. “It wasn’t a strong love potion to begin with and Wormtail wasn’t going to give anyone a full dose. At most, they would have thought James’s new bald spot really suited him.�

“Hey!� James felt the back of his head, still clearly bothered by the earlier mishap.

“Now, since not only did Remus get us into this singing mess, but he also thinks I’m the sort of person who goes about preying on innocent girls, I think the least he can do is help us write this song.�

“Whereas, I think the least I can do is, in fact, nothing,� Remus replied, flopping down on Sirius’s red and gold bedspread.

“Oh, come on, Moony,� Prongs wheedled. “I’ve had enough mishaps already and I think Evans has grown fonder of me. Maybe if I can pull this off it’ll impress her enough…�

Remus looked at James with pity; no rational human being would believe that Lily Evans could ever fancy James Potter. He was about to try to let James down gently but then saw the shiny new bald spot reflected in the mirror above Sirius’s chest of drawers. Tonight didn’t seem a particularly good time to crush James’s hope, nor did it seem the sort of thing one ought to do at Christmas. Remus wasn’t actually certain what holiday was best suited to destroying all hope… possibly Valentine’s day. James was still looking at him expectantly.

“Fine,� Remus sighed. “Let’s see what you have so far.�

James happily passed the parchment they’d been scribbling on. After only a few lines Remus started to snicker. After about ten minutes of corrections, he handed the parchment to Sirius.

Sirius glanced over it. “Not bad, Moony! But does the last line really rhyme?�

“No, it doesn’t,� Remus admitted. “But I think you’ll agree that it’s about as good as it’s going to get. Besides, Evans will probably like it.�

“True. And let’s face it, thus far my first two plans haven’t exactly been a roaring success,� Sirius replied, handing the new lyrics to James.

James looked them over carefully before adding, “Well done, Moony! Now, Padfoot… how is it that I’m not going to make a fool of myself singing this?�

“Don’t worry about that,� Sirius replied jovially. “You ought to be worried about looking a fool when you sing with Evans. I hear she has a fantastic voice.�

“I’m not singing with Evans,� James stubbornly announced, crossing his arms over his chest. “I don’t care about your Operation: Two Turtledoves; I’m just not doing it.�

Sirius didn’t reply, but merely raised an eyebrow.

James continued, “Why would you think that I’d ever agree to such a barmy plan?�

“Trust me, Prongs. You’ll want to sing this song with Evans,� Sirius replied. He handed another piece of parchment to James, who quickly scanned through it.

James began to unconsciously play with his hair. “It’s not that I don’t like your… er, special alterations to the song, Padfoot, but it still doesn’t change the fact that I can’t actually sing it.�

Sirius then proudly pulled a small bottle from within his robes. “You can with this,� he replied, tossing the potion to James.

“What is it?� Remus asked.

“It’s a Bellavox Potion,� Sirius replied. “Guaranteed to make even a crow sound like a nightingale… for a little while.� He turned to James and added, “Just pour it into a glass and drink it right before you have to perform and voilà: guaranteed to impress Evans.�

“Well done, Padfoot; you do think of everything!� James carefully pocketed the tiny bottle before making his way back to the party.

Remus however, was still curious. “And how are you going to con Evans into agreeing to this… by the way, what song is it?�

Sirius smiled in reply. “First of all, I don’t recall saying she’d have an option. Secondly, do you remember that song… Baby It’s Cold Outside?�

“Yes, I believe it is now permanently etched into the brain of every Gryffindor student. Come to think of it, the Ravenclaws might have been able to hear it too. I meant to ask you Sirius, how in Merlin’s name did you not end up in detention over that?�

Sirius grinned. “Well, as you know, I did get hauled into Dumbledore’s office, but it turns out that he was surprisingly supportive of my ‘efforts to imbue the staff and students with holiday cheer’. Turns out he loves waking up to music, though he did ask that I use more variety. He lent me his copy of Let The House Elves Sing and told me I could keep it up as long as I played his favourite carol too.�

Remus laughed. He’d nearly forgotten that Professor Dumbledore used to insist on everyone singing the school song at the beginning of term; he’d also forgotten the mutinous looks Dumbledore had received from the staff. Now that he thought about it, forcing everyone to wake up to holiday music did seem the sort of thing Dumbledore would support.

“So, I understand why Dumbledore would think it was a good idea… but really Padfoot, what were you thinking?�

Sirius crossed his arms behind his head and leaned back. “I was hoping you’d ask, Moony. I’m actually quite proud of this. You see, I needed to blast that song all over the castle so that everyone at the party would know it.�

“Well, I think it’s safe to say that you accomplished that spectacularly,� Remus informed him.

“Yes, quite,� Sirius agreed. “Well, you might know a bunch of Muggle songs, but James and I weren’t raised listening to them. I’m willing to bet half the people here never would have heard that song if not for my help.�

“You are truly a patron of the arts,� Remus added sarcastically while rolling his eyes.

“Well, there wouldn’t be a lot of point to get Prongs and Evans to sing the song for everyone if no one’s ever heard it before,� Sirius pointed out.

“It won’t matter, Padfoot,� Remus argued. “There’s no way she’ll agree to do it.�

“Moony, once again you underestimate me,� Sirius interrupted. “I went to the trouble of getting Nick’s help with this one.�

“Nick? You mean St Nick?� Remus asked, even more confused.

“Of course not, you muppet; I meant Nearly Headless Nick. He supports my plan.� Sirius then added as an afterthought, “Of course, that may be because I told him he had to if he wanted to come to the party.�

Remus rolled his eyes. “That might have had something to do with it.�

“Still, you have to admit, Moony, all things considered the party’s going quite well,� Sirius informed him.

Remus nearly agreed. Then they saw the scene which was unfolding in the living room.

---

Apparently Gustave, the Christmas goose, had ingested enough potion-tainted cookies to fall madly in love with none other than James Potter. The goose had been searching wildly for the object of his affections and had finally found him. Gustave was currently hissing furiously and snapping at anyone who tried to approach his new love interest.

“What the Dickens is that goose doing in my living room?� Sirius demanded.

Remus quietly replied, “Well, if I had to guess, I would say that Gustave might have eaten your Operation: Christmas Cookie.�

Sirius glared at Remus before focusing on the kitchen door and shouting, “Peter! Get in here!�

Peter appeared moments later, looking quite flustered. “Yes?�

“Why is Christmas dinner in the living room instead of in a cooking pot where it belongs?� Sirius asked, clearly on the verge of losing his temper.

Peter bit his lip. “Well… it’s just that Gustave…�

“I told you not to name it!� Sirius barked at him. He started towards Gustave. “I’ll wring its neck myself!�

James took one look at Peter’s face and spoke up. “Aww, lighten up Padfoot. Neither of you have the faintest idea how to cook this thing anyway. Besides, didn’t I tell you that I wanted a guard-goose for Christmas?�

Remus then muttered quietly to Sirius, “Besides, who knows what will happen if we all eat a goose that’s full of love potion.�

“Fine, the goose lives,� Sirius relented. “Merry Christmas, James.�

Peter was clearly pleased with the outcome. “Thanks,� James replied as Gustave snuggled up against him. Catching Sirius’s eye, James added, “You really shouldn’t have.�

Remus couldn’t be certain, but he thought that Lily was looking at James a bit differently. Sirius then made an announcement, “Good evening, everyone. It may have come to your attention already that the mistletoe is actually poison ivy.�

Most of the guests looked rather unsettled by this news, but Sirius continued, “Not to worry: you can still kiss under it; just don’t touch it. More importantly though, James and I lost a bet to the lovely Miss Evans regarding the authenticity of the mistletoe. In order to fulfill our end of that bet, we are now going to perform a song.�

Sirius clearly had everyone’s attention; even Gustave seemed excited. Remus took a few moments to fumble with his gramophone and soon everyone could hear the melody of You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch.

James and Sirius began singing together.

“You’re a mean one, Voldemort!
You really are a snake.
You're as cuddly as a Kappa,
And as slippery as a Shrake,
Voldemort!�

James then sang in a surprisingly good voice:

“You're a pasty vampire,
who’s heart could use a stake!�

Remus looked around the room while marveling at how well the Bellavox Potion was working. Most of the guests seemed to be enjoying his lyrics, though he noticed several seemed unnerved by the flippant use of Voldemort’s name.

Sirius started to sing the second verse alone:

“You're a monster, Voldemort!
Your nose is but a hole.
Your brain is full of Doxies.
You've got Dungbombs in your soul,
Voldemort!
Your aroma is less pleasant than a
putrid Mountain troll!

James stepped forward to take the last verse. Remus, kept an eye on Lily to gauge her reaction to the final line of the song, which he was particularly proud of, even if it didn’t rhyme terribly well.

“You're a vile one, Voldemort!
You have eyes of scarlet red.�

“Or brown?� James mouthed to Sirius, before resuming the next line of the song.

“You have all the tender sweetness
Of a hungry Quintaped,
Voldemort!
Given the choice between the two of you,
I would rather date the giant squid!�

Lily burst out laughing, before turning beet red. No one except Remus seemed to notice, as James and Sirius were enjoying a round of applause from the assembled guests.

Sirius put his hands in the air, calling for everyone’s attention again. “And now, without further ado, the ghost of Gryffindor Tower, who will also be filling tonight’s role of the ghost of Christmas past, has an announcement to make.�

Nearly Headless Nick floated towards the middle of the floor, his head wobbling precariously. Remus assumed that Operation: Two Turtledoves was about to begin. He still couldn’t imagine Sirius’s plan actually working though.

Nick looked around the room, clearly enjoying having so many people’s attention. He was carrying a small piece of parchment with him, and began to read from it. “As you probably already know, I, Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington, have been the ghost of Gryffindor Tower for nearly half a millennium. In that time, I have witnessed many Christmas traditions, but none are dearer to me than that of the Head Boy and Head Girl Christmas duet.�

James did his best to subtly pour the last of the Bellavox Potion into is Butterbeer and quickly finished it off. Peter leaned in and whispered to Sirius, “I’ve never heard of the Head Boy and Head Girl Christmas duet.�

“That’s because I made it up,� Sirius quietly explained. “Sounds good though, doesn’t it? I really ought to suggest it to Dumbledore next time I’m in his office.�

Nick continued, “This year, I’m especially looking forward to the duet as both the Head Boy, James Potter, and the Head Girl, Lily Evans, are Gryffindors, who I am sure will do our house proud in this time-honoured tradition.�

Several Gryffindor students cheered at this. Lily Evans was not among them. Instead, she was looking at Nick in a deeply suspicious manner.

“I’ve never heard of this tradition,� Lily informed him, her arms crossed.

“Really?� Nick asked, clearly uncomfortable. “I thought everyone would have…�

Sirius jumped in to rescue his plan. “Now, Evans, we honoured our bet and sang our duet. I’d hate to think you’re going to disappoint all these people and refuse to do your part for this bit of Hogwarts history.�

Lily looked as though she would very much like to start a new tradition of ‘hex the Sirius Black’, however after looking at the group of assembled people, she grudgingly replied, “And what would this ancient song of Hogwarts tradition be?�

“Glad you asked, Evans,� Sirius replied, handing her a piece of parchment. “It’s an adaptation of Baby It’s Cold Outside.�

“Ah, yes,� Lily replied dryly. “This obviously is a centuries old tradition. And I suppose, you’ve already heard of this duet, Potter?�

James nodded in mock seriousness. “Of course, didn’t you read about it in Hogwarts: A History? Now, I’ll admit that part of me was hoping that we’d get out of it, but I just don’t think I could let all these people down, Evans. Besides, it’s part of my duty as Head Boy.�

“I suppose I don’t really have a choice, do I?� Lily sighed, looking around at a room full of expectant people before turning to glare at Sirius.

“Not if you want to uphold the sacred duty of Hogwarts Head Girl,� Peter interjected with as much seriousness as he could muster.

Remus started towards the gramophone again but Lily interrupted him. “Hang on, Lupin. If I’m going to be manipulated into singing this song, at least give me a chance to skim over the words first.�

“That seems fair,� James agreed.

“All right,� Sirius announced. “While Evans familiarizes herself with our beloved Hogwarts’ Christmas song, how about all the Gryffindors here sing God Rest Ye, Merry Hippogriffs? I’m sure you’ve all learned the words by now!�

Despite several groans at the outset, Sirius proceeded to lead his fellow Gryffindors, Nearly Headless Nick included, in a surprisingly rousing rendition of his favourite holiday song. Not to be outdone, the Hufflepuff Quidditch team then performed Icky the Abominable Snowman.

Remus tried to catch Alicia Fawcett’s eye, but she seemed to be looking at the Beater she had been kissing earlier who was now singing in a deep baritone voice. His heart sank but he reminded himself that everyone was probably watching the Hufflepuff Quidditch team. Upon looking about the room, Remus noticed that one person in particular wasn’t watching the Hufflepuffs: Lily Evans didn’t even raise her head as she studied the piece of parchment in her hand. Remus couldn’t tell if Lily was unfamiliar with the Hufflepuffs’ song or if she was simply busy trying to learn the one Sirius had handed her. By the time they reached the second chorus, most of the other guests had joined in. Remus couldn’t help but think that it was a rather perfect moment, standing around the newly redecorated Christmas tree with his three best friends. Despite his many misgivings, he was really enjoying Sirius’s party.

As the song came to a close, Artemis Lovegood stepped forward and informed those gathered that she and her friends would be singing Heat the Cauldron Up, It’s Snowing Outside. Artemis boldly stepped forward, practically dragging Rachel Moody and Alicia Fawcett with her. Remus found himself quite pleased to have an excuse to stare at Alicia. To his delight, he noted that she was no longer looking at the Hufflepuff Beater. In fact, she wasn’t looking at anyone, but kept staring at her feet and blushing in a manner which Remus thought was quite endearing. He couldn’t actually hear Alicia’s singing, but imagined that she likely had a lovely voice. Had he been paying closer attention to the other girls, he might have noticed Rachel Moody staring at Sirius.

After the girls’ rather sultry song finished, Sirius once again got everyone’s attention. “Well, I think it’s high time these two turtledoves got around to singing their duet!�

His statement earned him a glare from Evans, but a good deal of applause from most of those gathered. Encouraged by his guests’ reaction, Sirius added, “And of course, the traditional Head Boy and Head Girl duet is supposed to end with a traditional Head Boy and Head Girl kiss.�

“Not on your life, Black,� Lily replied swiftly.

Remus decided to start the music before Lily had a chance to change her mind about the duet.

Sirius leaned over and quietly told Peter and Remus, “Well that went better than at the beginning of term when I tried to convince her that the Head Boy and Head Girl were supposed to share a dormitory.�

“You couldn’t have actually expected her to believe that,� Remus chuckled, fondly recalling how Sirius had managed to get nearly all the students on the Hogwarts Express to confirm his ridiculous story.

Remus couldn’t help but marvel at how much Sirius could accomplish when he set his mind to it and was curious about what exactly Sirius had done to the song lyrics. He was even more curious as to whether James and Lily would get through the entire song without James or Sirius being slapped. In fact, most of Sirius’s guests were wondering the same thing.

However, when Lily’s cue came, she began to sing, “I really can't stay.�

Without missing a beat, James jumped in, “but Lily it's cold outside.�

“I've got to go away,� she replied.

Slightly bolder, James echoed, “But Lily it's cold outside.�

“This evening has been…�

James cut in, keeping perfect time, “Been hoping that you'd drop in.�

“…So very nice,� Lily finished.

James, hopefully reached out for Lily’s hands. “I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice!�

Lily, smirking slightly, snatched her hands away from James’s grasp, singing, “McGonagall will start worry.�

Smiling in spite of himself, James continued, “Beautiful, what’s your hurry?�

If Remus hadn’t known better, he would have thought that Lily was beginning to enjoy herself. “I don’t want to upset Dumbledore.�

“Listen to the fireplace roar,� James sang, putting his hands on Lily’s shoulders.

She swatted them away, replying, “So really I'd better scurry.�

James used a quick non-verbal spell and floated a bottle of Butterbeer over. “Beautiful, please don't hurry.�

Playing along, Lily conceded, “But maybe just a half a drink more.�

James turned to Remus, gave him an exaggerated wink and added, “Put some music on while I pour.�

Feigning shock, Lily added, “The students might faint!�

“Lily, it's bad out there!�

She theatrically raised an eyebrow before singing, “Say what's in this drink?�

“No love potions I swear!� answered James, throwing his hands up in surrender.

As the pair continued the song, Remus couldn’t help but think it a shame that Lily had never shown any interest in James. Everyone was clearly enjoying their performance, even Lily, in spite of herself.

By the time they reached the third verse, Remus almost believed that Lily had grown rather fond of James, who had somehow managed to sneak an arm around her shoulders. Gustave was hissing with jealousy behind his leg, but was otherwise behaving himself.

“The Fat Lady will be suspicious,� Lily sang.

James leaned in close to her. “Gosh your lips look delicious!�

“Filch will be watching the door,� she answered, taking a few steps back.

James followed, pointing out, “That’s what secret passages are for.�

Lily continued, “The Slytherins’ minds are vicious.�

James leaned in for a kiss, but Lily managed to avoid it. Looking somewhat awkward he sang, “Gosh your lips are delicious…?�

Remus winced. James’s voice had cracked horribly on the last line.

Lily nearly missed her place. “…But maybe just a Butterbeer more.�

James’s voice continued to crack and squeak on his next line. “Never such a blizzard before.�

James became increasingly embarrassed as the effects of the Bellavox Potion continued to wear off. However, he continued to sing, if it could really be called singing as he wasn’t even remotely close to the correct key.

“This is painful,� Remus whispered to Sirius and Peter.

“I know; I can hear him too,� Sirius replied grimacing.

“We’ll create a distraction,� Remus announced, as he grabbed Peter by the arm and hurried him into the kitchen.

Moments later, Victoria Williams leapt wildly onto the sofa while screaming at the top of her lungs, “RAT!�

Peter helpfully scurried all about the floor, causing many of the guests to scramble out of his path. All thoughts of the traditional duet vanished immediately. As a final touch, Peter chased the Beater whom Alicia had taken an interest in. Remus couldn’t help but feel a bit smug as his rival ran about the house shrieking like a little girl.

After having thoroughly terrorized the majority of the guests, Peter ran back into the kitchen. Shortly thereafter a loud bang was heard and Peter emerged, in human form. “Not to worry, I took care of it,� he reported.

“Thanks, Wormtail,� James told him quietly. “You really saved me out there.�

Peter shrugged. “It was Moony’s idea.�

“I give up,� Sirius informed his three friends. “No offense, James, but it would take a miracle to get you and Lily together. I mean… not only have each of my plans failed…�

“They’ve failed spectacularly,� Remus finished for him.

“Well, I’ve got a bald spot, been thoroughly soaked, kissed the wrong girl, been poisoned, have a lovesick goose after me and just made an utter fool of myself when your potion wore off early.�

“But other than that, you’re having a good time?� Sirius asked, unable to keep a straight face.

Peter answered for his friend. “Of course he is: Evans is here and not once has she called him a toerag.�

Remus snorted. To be fair, it had been well over a year since he’d last heard Evans refer to James as a toerag.

“By the way, Peter, there’s something I’ve been wondering… If you’re out here, what’s happened to dinner?� James asked.

Peter shrugged. “I made bangers and mash.�

“That’s… not exactly Christmas food,� Remus pointed out.

“No, but I actually know how to make bangers and mash,� Peter explained. His eyes suddenly widened and he dashed back towards the kitchen. “And they’re probably burning by now!�

It wasn’t long before all the guests were eating slightly blackened sausages with rather lumpy mashed potatoes.

In an effort to liven things up, Mary MacDonald suggested playing a game entitled ‘Christmas Truth or Dare’. “I’ll go first,� she explained, turning to Harold Greengrass. “Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?� she asked.

Harold looked rather confused, but replied, “Er, Christmas Truth, I suppose.�

“All right,� Mary replied, “Harold, what’s your favourite Christmas tradition?�

“Well… I guess I’d have to say the traditional Head Boy and Head Girl duet,� Harold replied, grinning. He then turned to Artemis Lovegood. “Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?�

“Christmas Dare!� Artemis announced.

Harold looked utterly perplexed at what he ought to do next. “Umm… I Christmas dare you to…�

Harold looked about helplessly. “To go make a snow angel outside.�

Artemis looked slightly crestfallen at Harold’s lack of creativity but hurried outside and completed the dare.

She then turned her attention to Sirius. “Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?�

Sirius grinned wickedly. “Well, obviously Christmas Dare!�

Artemis bit her lip and smiled. “Fine. I Christmas Dare you to kiss Rachel under the mistletoe.�

Sirius rose to the challenge, not even bothering to remind everyone that it was actually poison ivy.

After about thirty seconds, James piped up, “I think that counts for having completed your dare, Sirius.�

Remus noticed that Rachel Moody was quite red-faced as she returned to her seat, but looked fairly pleased nonetheless.

Sirius was now surveying his guests with an evil expression, carefully evaluating which would be the best target.

“Remus! Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?�

On the one hand, Remus knew it would be madness to accept any sort of dare from Sirius Black. On the other hand, he didn’t want to appear too afraid of Sirius’s dare, even if it were a perfectly rational fear. “Christmas Dare.�

“Excellent!� Sirius replied. “I Christmas Dare you to sit on…� Sirius pretended to scan the room. “Alicia Fawcett’s lap and tell her what you’d like for Christmas.�

Remus resolved to only ever choose ‘truth’ in future. He also resolved to promptly murder Sirius Black the moment the party was over. In the meantime a scarlet-faced Remus very awkwardly hovered over Alicia’s lap while pointedly announcing, “I’d like to kill Sirius for Christmas.�

Most of those assembled laughed good-naturedly, Sirius included. Remus still felt mortified as he made his way back to where he had been sitting. He wanted to get back at Sirius, but Sirius had just had a turn. What Remus needed was to choose someone else who could give Sirius a hard time. “Evans, Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?�

“Christmas Truth,� Lily replied.

“What’s the best Christmas present you ever got?� Remus asked her.

Lily’s face froze and Remus immediately knew he’d crossed some sort of line, but couldn’t imagine what he’d done wrong. He had thought he’d been generous in giving her an easy question.

He could tell from across the room that Lily was upset. “A necklace,� she replied tonelessly. She quickly turned. “Pettigrew, Christmas Truth or Christmas Dare?�

Remus wasn’t even paying attention as Peter attempted to dance to music from The Nutcracker. Normally he would have deeply enjoyed watching Peter attempt a pirouette. However, he noticed Lily quietly excuse herself and decided that he really ought to apologize for having upset her, though he was still at a loss as to what he’d said wrong.

---

He found her on Sirius’s porch, staring out at the snow, her lower lip trembling.

“Lily, I’m sorry. Is… is there anything I can do?� Remus asked, feeling incredibly awkward. She only shook her head in reply, her long red hair swishing from side to side.

Unsure what to do next, Remus walked over next to Lily and gazed out upon Sirius’s lawn with her. Snow was gently falling about them; however, there were enough openings in the clouds to reveal a few twinkling stars.

After nearly a minute, Lily said in a muffled voice. “I’m sorry, Remus. I must look such a fool, crying over a simple question.�

“No one thinks you’re being foolish,� Remus reassured her. “These past few months have been a strain on everyone.�

“Can I tell you a secret?� Lily asked, having regained some of her composure.

“Of course you can,� Remus replied.

Lily looked at him shrewdly. “You can’t tell the three stooges in there. Do you still promise to keep my secret?�

Remus wasn’t used to keeping secrets from his friends. Nevertheless, if Lily needed a confidant, he was willing to keep whatever her secret was from the other three Marauders. He’d suspected for some time that Lily was aware of a bigger secret of his than who he fancied. Whether she actually knew was more than Remus had been able to determine; she’d never so much as mentioned the subject of lycanthropy to him and he wasn’t about to bring it up. Remus then realized that Lily was still waiting for his answer and told her quietly, “I promise.�

Lily sighed and pulled a pendant out from underneath her robes. “This is my most favourite Christmas present.�

Remus examined the necklace with care; it appeared to be a small glowing deer inside a tiny Christmas ornament.

“It’s my Patronus,� Lily informed him. “I know it’s not a real Patronus; but that’s what I was told it was when I got it. I was only nine and back then I was terrified at the thought of Dementors.�

“And the Sorting Hat still put you in Gryffindor,� Remus teased. “So you’ve obviously got over it.�

“Because of this,� Lily replied, protectively hanging onto her little charm. “I probably wouldn’t have been brave enough to get into Gryffindor without it.�

“I suspect you would have made the cut anyway,� Remus told her kindly. “You’re probably one of the bravest people I know.�

Lily blushed at the compliment. “I suppose what I meant is, I’ve always felt that this necklace is the source of whatever courage I have. When I’m about to do something that scares me, I always think of it. I’ve actually worn this every day for… well, I guess for eight years now.�

Remus almost asked who had given her the necklace, but then he realized that if Lily had received it before she had arrived at Hogwarts, there was only one possibility. He had to admit that it was a side of Severus Snape that he wouldn’t have previously believed existed. For the first time, he wondered if Lily missed her childhood friend, though he still found it hard to believe that anyone could actually miss having Snape around.

Lily broke the silence. “Have you managed the Patronus Charm yet?�

Remus shook his head. “I haven’t even tried it yet. It won’t come up until the end of the year. Have you?�

“I can’t seem to get it,� Lily replied. She sighed, gazing out into the snowy woods. “I know this doesn’t make any sense, but this year… I wanted a real Patronus for Christmas, but I don’t seem to be able to manage the happy thought.�

“I’m sorry,� Remus told her, wishing there was something he could do.

“Thanks,� Lily replied, smiling slightly. “Is it silly to wish for my own little Christmas miracle?�

“Not at all.� Something suddenly clicked in Remus’s mind. “Lily, what do you think your Patronus would look like?�

Lily held up her necklace again. “I’ve always thought it would look just like this, only bigger. I know it’s just a shrunken Christmas ornament… but I will actually be quite disappointed if my Patronus doesn’t turn out to be a deer.�

“Well, you never know,� Remus replied. “But I’ve been told that Christmas is a time for miracles…� He pretended to consult his watch. “I really ought to get back inside.�

Lily glanced back through the frosty window. “I’ll be back in a bit. I just want to be alone for a little while.�

Remus looked her directly in the eyes, “Just promise me that you won’t leave without saying goodbye first. All right, Evans?�

Lily smiled and nodded in reply before heading out for a walk. There was a crescent moon hanging low in the night sky, causing the snow to sparkle and leaving Lily’s path relatively well lit. She was still upset with herself for having lost her self control in front of everyone. She’d promised herself that she would be strong. Lily closed her eyes, just feeling the snowflakes land in her hair and on her face.

When she opened her eyes again, she gasped in awe. Not ten feet from where she stood was a deer, staring at her. Not wanting to frighten the animal, Lily didn’t move. After nearly a minute, to Lily’s surprise the deer took a cautious step towards her.

On impulse, Lily slowly held out her hand. The stag continued towards her, stopping just short of her outstretched palm. Thinking that she must be dreaming, Lily put her hand on his nose. The stag snorted lightly, his breath visible in the chilly air.

Lily continued to pat the stag’s head, staring straight into his hazel eyes. She couldn’t help but find something oddly familiar about the deer. It wasn’t until she started to pat the stag’s neck that she suddenly stepped back.

With an utterly bemused look on her face, she gingerly touched one of the velvet covered antlers. For a moment she bit her lip, but then she guessed, “Prongs?�

A moment later James Potter was standing before her, looking rather embarrassed. “How did you know?� he asked, while adjusting his glasses and fully expecting to be slapped or cursed.

Lily laughed. “I wish I could say that it was your eyes… but it was actually that bald spot at the back of your head.�

“So… you aren’t mad?� James asked, still wondering if he ought to be ready with a Shield Charm.

Lily shook her head, still unable to stop smiling.

“Well, I guess you know my big secret now,� James told her, nervously playing with his hair.

“Only because Lupin told you mine, which I really ought to be cross with him about,� Lily replied. She frowned slightly, looking off in the direction of the house as if expecting Remus to pop out from behind a nearby bush and apologize.

“Whatever that secret was, I don’t know it,� James told her. “He just grabbed me and told me to find you in the woods… as an Animagus.� It still felt strange to him that she knew his other form.

Her eyes sparkling, Lily replied, “I guess I ought to make it fair and tell you one of my secrets then.�

She motioned for James to lean in closer. To his surprise, instead of whispering something in his ear, he found Lily’s lips on his. After they broke apart, he asked her huskily, “So… I think you still have to tell me a secret.�

“Fine,� Lily answered cheekily. She then informed him in an exaggerated whisper, “I just kissed James Potter.�

James put an arm around her shoulders, his heart beating faster when she snuggled in against him. “Lily Evans, I’m afraid that won’t be a secret for long, as I plan on telling anyone who’ll listen.�

Lily rolled her eyes and laughed. “I suppose there’s no point in trying to stop you… but there’s something I want to try before we go back to the house.�

James was still grinning ear to ear as he cocked his head and asked, “Oh? What might that be?�

Back in Sirius’s house, the other three Marauders were gazing out the window, ignoring the party that continued on around them.

“Do you think the plan worked?� Peter asked.

Upon seeing two silver Patronuses bounding, side by side, about Sirius’s yard, Remus replied, “I expect so.�

“I told you I’d get those two together,� Sirius reminded them. “And all it took was…�

Remus interrupted him, “A small miracle.�

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