Day 800 - Today I saw the most luscious piece of meat sitting on the table... just sitting there, waiting for me... Needless to say, I "forced" myself to spring up to the table and devour it.
I beat my personal best of ten seconds to inhale a slab of meat.
Day 807 - I saw a rather cute boy snake today out in the gardens. I went to go meet him, but Voldy saw me and grabbed me...
Because of it, he now won't let me out of his sight and has me locked up in the mansion. He can take over the world, yet I can't have a boyfriend. Jeez! What gives?!
Day 810 - Voldy sent Wormtail out on some sort of secret mission today, without even bothering to tell moi about it. Hmmph.
Day 811 - Well, I found out what that the big "secret mission" was. It's nothing more than a simple plan to send Wormtail to live with someone named Severus Snape for the summer. I think I've heard of him, he's a teacher at Hogwarts and none to pleasant. It would certainly explain why Wormtail wasn't looking all that pleased with it.
Ha! Now I can lounge around the Riddle mansion without having that sickening man breathe down my neck.
Day 820 - Somebody please put me out of my MISERY! Say it ain't so! Voldy said that I have to go check up on Wormtail for a couple of weeks. NO!! Kill. Me. Now.
Day 822 - Right now I'm in the middle of packing for my torturous journey to keep an eye on that spaz Wormtail.
You know, if it wasn't for the fact that Voldy could turn me into a belt (a very fashionable belt, I might add) with a simple swish of his wand, I would have bitten him by now for coming up with such a stupid idea...
Still Day 822 - I've finished packing. I have included an extra layer of skin incase I feel like shedding this one. Also, I can't expect to travel without Mr. Snuggley-boo, my teddy. Did I just admit that?! Oh well, it's not like somebody is going to steal this diary and post it for a bunch of people to read...
Day 828 - I've just arrived at some dreary place called Spinners End. What a dump this place is. The house where I'm staying isn't any better. I haven't seen this much drab since I stayed with my Great-Aunt Ethelinda in South-eastern Asia when I was just a little snake-ling.
The owner of this place, Severus Snape, is quite the dower person. His reaction to seeing me on his doorstep was nothing compared to what Wormtail's was like when he saw me. Wormtail wimpered and dashed back into his room behind the bookshelf. COWARD!!
Day 833 - Everyday since I've been here, it has been the same boring ritual. This is just a detail of what I did today:
7am - Ate dry, crappy, snake food for breakfast.
8am - Went back to sleep.
9am - Tortured Wormtail.
10am - Tortured Wormtail some more.
11am - Wrote to distant relatives.
12pm - Stole lunch from an angry Snape.
1pm - Wrote to Voldy. Told him everything is A-OK so far.
2pm - Tortured Wormtail again.
3pm - Sunbathed.
4pm - Broke into Snape's secret stash of liquor...*hic*
5pm - Dinner, which consisted of crappy, dry snake food again.
6pm - Exersized (got to keep my girlish shape) by torturing Wormtail.
7pm - Stared constantly at Wormtail, making him quite uneasy and jumpy.
8pm - Liquor and dry, crappy snake food weren't agreeing. Vomited on Snape's robes, and he was very unhappy about that.
9pm - Still felt nauseous. Decided to head to bed early. Am hoping for a nice dream about that cute garden snake at home.
Day 835 - Have I mentioned how depressing it is being here? If it were to get any livelier, I'd expect a funeral to break out at any time.
Day 837 - Something relatively interesting happened today. Two women appeared at the house. One I recognized as Bella Lestrange (COW!), but the other I didn't know. But obviously Snape knew them. I didn't know he had a girlfriend, let alone two. I didn't think the ole dog had it in him.
I didn't stay to watch, but as I was leaving, one of them started blubbering loudly.
Day 842 - I get to go home today!! Another day here at this dive and I would've needed to fling myself off the nearest ravine!!
Day 845 - Ah, home sweet home! How I've missed thee!
The lush lawns, that boy in the gardens, and yes, even Voldy, the big oaf he is.