They don’t say a word as they gallop down the passageway, gasping for breaths and clutching the stitches in their sides as they run, without stopping, from a building in Hogsmeade and back to the Hogwarts Castle. They run, and they run and they run, slamming the door behind them and locking it when they are back in their dormitory. Safe.
They collapse on their beds, chests heaving, beads of sweat along their foreheads despite the late winter chill. The fear is still in them, the terror of being faced by a werewolf at the beginning of the transformation.
Sirius stares up the ceiling of his four-poster, remembers Remus’s body as it went rigid on the bed in the Shrieking Shack, remembers the moan of pain that came out of his mouth, realizes that it is Remus the rumors are really about and shudders. He can’t stand to stay on his bed–any bed for a moment longer and he rises it from it quickly, stalking over to the window where this whole mess started.
He stares out, his eyes passing over the Whomping Willow and curses the day it was planted. His eyes look further, reaching out, trying to see the Shack miles away and finds himself unable to make it out. He swears, hits his fist against the window sill, and then swears again, holding his throbbing hand to his chest, wishing he could punch the glass out of the window.
There is a fury within him, fury at this discovery, at the injustice of it. No one deserves to have this curse. Remus doesn’t deserve to have this curse.
Sirius turns back to the center of the room. James is sitting up in his bed, Peter looks as though he’s about to start hyperventilating.
“Do we care?”
“What?”
“Do we care?” Sirius asks again, sticking his hands in his pockets as he leans against the window. His foot taps anxiously against the stone floor.
James mouth works silently.
“I don’t think I do,” Sirius offers, while James tries to answer.
“But–”
“So he becomes...something else for one night a month,” Sirius says before James can argue, present valid reasons as to why this is completely insane. “Is that a good reason for us to not be friends with him anymore?”
“But–”
“It isn’t like he’d leave school,” Sirius says logically. “The
staff has to know; Dumbledore knows. They aren’t going to kick him out if we tell them that we know. They’ll just swear us to secrecy or something, make sure that we don’t tell.”
“What? About his furry little problem?” James scoffs.
Sirius stares at him for a moment and then snorts with laughter. In moments, James is laughing too, kicking his feet against the bed and Peter has gotten enough of his breath back to smile.
“Yeah. His furry little problem,” Sirius agrees, grinning.
“I don’t know, Sirius,” James says hesitantly.
Sirius rolls his eyes. “If I hadn’t dragged you there tonight you never would have known. Has he ever done–”
“A werewolf,” Peter says, slowly sitting up. “Sirius, he’s a werewolf.”
“Thank you Peter, I hadn’t realized,” Sirius snaps, and Peter blushes.
“He’s right,” James says quietly. “Peter’s right. Remus is a werewolf. And he’s dangerous.”
“Has he ever hurt you?” Sirius asks pointedly.
“No, but–”
“Did you ever think that he would hurt you?”
“No. But Sirius, that’s not the point. He could.”
“He wouldn’t.”
“You don’t know that,” Peter said practically.
“I do too.”
“You–”
“Remus wouldn’t hurt any of us. You know that. He kept on telling us to leave, didn’t he? Remus wouldn’t hurt anything as small as a fairy; he isn’t going to hurt any of us.”
“Sirius–”
“No.” Sirius is now truly annoyed. “I’m not talking to any of you,” he says crossly. “How can you have so little trust in him?” he asks, stalking to his bed and toeing off his
shoes. “We’re going to stay friends with him and we aren’t going to discuss it and now I’m going to bed.”
And because he now has nothing to say to any of his friends, that’s just what he does.
*****
The next day, Remus is, as expected, not at breakfast. Or at their first lesson, or second. He stays missing straight up until lunch, at which point Sirius marches straight up to Professor McGonagall, eating at the Head Table, and demands to know where Remus is.
“Mr Black, you know very well that he is visiting–”
He hardens his gaze and she sees it in them, knows that he is not going to take the excuse for whatever reason, and swallows.
“The infirmary, Mr Black. He is with Madam Pomfrey in the Hospital Wing.”
“Thank you,” he says with a curt nod of his head, and leaves the Great Hall.
He finds the door locked when he reaches the infirmary, and knocks, tapping his foot anxiously against the floor until Madam Pomfrey comes to open it. She seems surprised to see him.
“Remus,” Sirius says baldly.
“Is not taking any visitors.”
“He’ll want to see me.”
“No, he doesn’t, Mr Black. Perhaps, after he returns to classes, you may–”
“Tell him I don’t care.”
She blinks. “Pardon?”
“Tell him I don’t care. About–about what we were discussing the other day. Tell him it doesn’t make a difference.”
She eyes him. “Very well,” she sighs, and begins to close the door.
“You will tell him, won’t you?” Sirius asks, sticking his foot between the door and the jamb.
“Yes, Mr Black, I will tell him.”
“I–” He stops; he’s done everything he can. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” Madam Pomfrey says, and closes the door.
Sirius starts down the hallway and is nearly around the corner when–
“Mr Black?”
“Yes?” he asks, turning around quickly.
“He says to tell you thank you.”
He stares at her, shocked.
“Mr Black?”
“Oh. Yes. Thank you,” he says, watching as she disappears again behind the door. He considers and then continues on, smiling.
A/N: The next set of four chapters are going to be MUCH longer than this one and are going to take you from third year to fifth and a spectacular *fun* realization. If you enjoyed, please review!