Chapter Thirty-Seven: The Guilt of Mr. Malfoy
With Edgar Payne as a neutral acquaintance and Colm Scrivener back as an enemy, the universe seemed to realign itself once again. The whisperings that had plagued Lottie at every turn stopped; Colm was still followed by rumors and camouflaged snickers, but that was the least of Lottie’s concerns. She took to reading the diary into the early hours of the morning in her free time. She had gotten through all six of Harry’s years at Hogwarts by Christmas holiday.
With a week off of classes, Lottie took to studying the diary all day by the fireside. Andrea learned that it was futile to try and reason with her at these times and tagged along with Sophie and Julianne until Lottie was quite finished.
The last part of Harry’s account was the hardest to read. Lottie could almost feel the panic rising through the aging pages. It was almost suffocating. Harry had become a friend, a close confidant. He trusted her”his cousin”with everything. And she trusted him”she would if she could somehow talk to him”reach through the yellow pages of the diary and grasp whatever piece of his memory was left.
‘They killed them,’ Lottie read. ‘Malfoy killed Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. There was an attack on the Burrow. Almost everyone got away”they were almost safe, but Malfoy caught Molly with her back turned. Arthur went back to help her…’
Lottie put the book down. Malfoy”Draco Malfoy”the man who was was staying in the castle? Who Hermione trusted? Her heart did somersault in her chest.
She leapt to her feet and looked around. She had to do something”she had to. She took a frantic lap around the common room, as though she expected him to be hiding under one of the sofas, waiting for her. After deciding that the common room was clear, she took out through the clock and ran down the halls. Lottie pounded up the stairs, searching.
Her breathing became heavy. She clutched a stitch in her side. Running around in circles was not going to help anybody. She had to stop and come up with a plan. Where would he be? Who did he know?
Lottie’s stomach lurched again. She didn’t have time for this. A Death Eater was sitting comfortably in the castle, probably plotting its destruction, and nobody had a clue. She had to stop him. Groaning with frustration, she took off to the only place she had seen him before”Hermione’s office.
She ran up the stairs in record time and veered left down a corridor. Hermione’s door was ahead. She swung it open with such a force that it smashed against the bookshelf on the wall.
“Lottie?” Hermione glanced up from a stack of essays. “What””
“Malfoy!” Lottie raged.
“What?”
“Where is he?”
“He’s in the Great Hall, having lunch. What””
“No!” Lottie turned back to the doorway. “I can’t explain now. We need to get him out of here.” She took off down the corridor, her heart beating in her chest. A Death Eater at Alsemore surely meant that the Dark Lord could be here any second.
“Impedimenta,” Hermione said calmly. Lottie stopped in her tracks. Hermione’s footsteps drew towards her.
“Let me go,” Lottie growled. The spell felt like a brick wall that had made itself at home against her windpipe.
“Rowe, would you please explain your sudden rage against Draco before you go off to murder him?” Hermione asked, her voice quivering with laughter.
“It’s not funny,” Lottie said. She pushed against the spell harder. “In the diary”in Harry’s diary”it wrote about how Malfoy killed the”the”I don’t know their name”the Weasels?”
“The Weasleys?”
“Yes! He killed them”he’s a Death Eater!” Lottie could feel the spell relenting. She pushed with all of her weight against it.
“Lottie, you don’t understand. Malfoy””
The spell broke. Lottie stumbled forward, lost her balance, and slammed against the wall. “I have to go find him!” she shouted as she turned to the next corridor and began descending the steps to the Great Hall.
Her heart pounded in her throat. She pulled her wand out and pushed the doors open to the Great Hall. What seemed like every student turned their head as she ran down the aisle between the Maelioric and the Palmyitor table. She could see Malfoy, with his stupid, manicured eyebrows arched in surprise.
The Hall was silent as Lottie pounded down to the staff table. “Sectumsempra!” she shouted. A scarlet gash slid across Malfoy’s ivory face.
“Rowe”” Palmyitor got to her feet “”what on earth””
Lottie didn’t notice the dangerous glint in Palmyitor’s eyes. All she could see in front of her was Malfoy. “Stupefy!” she hissed.
This time, Draco was ready. His shimmering shield rebounded Lottie’s curse. Lottie dodged out of the way in a single step. “He’s a Death Eater!” she yelled. A collective gasp echoed in the Hall. “He’s a murderer.”
Draco rose to his feet. In a flurry of his emerald robes, he walked calmly down the Hall until he was only inches away from Lottie. She noticed that his wand was concealed in his long fingers, pointed directly at her heart. Scarlet blood slowly dripped down of his elegant features and pooled on the Great Hall floor. “Listen to me,” he hissed, his silver eyes glinting.
A sudden memory consumed her the moment their eyes connected. She was very young, maybe three or four. The door to their one room flat opened and a large, crumpled form with graying, blond hair fell onto their floor. “This is yours,” grunted a Death Eater who was standing above the dead body. “Bloody thing tried to start a revolt.” His voice was slick. Lottie, huddled behind her mother’s legs, could see a lock of blond hair under his hood. The Death Eater turned his masked face to Lottie and knelt down. Her nose almost touched the cool metal of his mask. His silver eyes glimmered in the firelight. In a flash, his wand was out, pointed against Lottie’s throat. Lottie remembered her mother’s scream, and her father’s involuntary jerk toward her. They were frozen in that moment of static fear for a good minute, before the Death Eater tucked his wand away. He left without another word, sweeping his robes behind him.
Lottie looked up at Malfoy. “You killed my grandfather,” she said, her voice shaking. “You killed the Weasleys. You’re nothing but a lying Death Eater! Stupe””
“Expelliarmus!” Lottie’s wand shot from her hand. The force of the spell pushed her backwards several paces. Palmyitor lowered her wand. “Now that is quite enough,” she said. “Carry on with lunch.”
As all of the other students began to cautiously nibble at their food again, Palmyitor strode down to separate Lottie and Malfoy, who were still glowering at each other with the hatred of several generations. “You two are behaving like children,” she said as she bent down and picked up Lottie’s wand. “No, Rowe, you don’t get this back until you cool your head. My office. Now.”
Still holding the diary to her chest, Lottie sulked to Palmyitor’s ever-familiar office; Malfoy trailed behind. The door slammed shut behind them. “Explain,” Palmyitor said as she settled herself at her desk.
“Professor, he’s a Death Eater.”
“I am no such thing.”
“I have proof!” Lottie flipped through the pages of the diary maniacally. “Listen to this”‘Malfoy killed Mr. and Mrs. Weasley”’”
A shrill chorus of laughter cut her off. “That?” sneered Malfoy. “That is why you see it fit to attack me?”
“Don’t laugh!” Lottie yelled, color rising to her cheeks. She couldn’t believe he was laughing at a time like this. She just wanted to hurt him”to curse him”if only Palmyitor would give her back her wand. “You killed my grandfather too”years ago. You left him dead at our door, remember?”
“That was my father,” Malfoy said.
“Your””
“My fathe is a Death Eater. He killed the Weasleys, not me. Don’t judge me by the errors of my father.”
“Well you don’t judge m because of my Muggle family, then!”
“Are you two finished yet?” Palmyitor rubbed her temples. “I would expect behavior like this from you, Rowe, but Draco? You are more than forty years her senior. All is cleared up, is it not? Contrary to what you believe, Rowe, Draco is not a Death Eater. There. Can we all go on with our day? Without bloodshed?”
“I very much agree,” Malfoy said. “Now that the trial is over, may I continue on with my business?”
“Of course”Oh, not you, Rowe.”
Lottie sighed and turned back to face Palmyitor. “Yes?”
Palmyitor waited until Malfoy closed the door before getting to her feet. She swept toward Lottie threateningly slowly. “Give me the book.”
“But””
“We tried to let you keep it. Clearly you cannot be trusted with the information.” Palmyitor extended her palm.
“But Harry is my cousin. It rightfully belongs to me.”
Palmyitor leaned down so that she was face to face with Lottie. Lottie quickly put of a block of Occlumency as she peered into the professor’s cold, brown eyes. “Harry Potter,” she hissed, “is dead. That diary belongs to nobody in particular. Just because you are related to the Famous Harry Potter”” she stood up to her full height “”does not mean this war is only yours to fight. If you want to pick up where he left off, you will have a lot of errors to fix where he failed.”
Lottie looked away; she flushed red. Her hands were very cold. “I”I was just trying to””
“Help?” Palmyitor returned to her desk and perched in her straight-backed chair. “Help by doing what you’re told. We are very capable of running this war without you or your famous cousin.”
Lottie did not say anything. Throat dry, she took a step toward Palmyitor’s desk and slapped the diary onto the tabletop. Silently, she left the office and let the door slam behind her.
“That was quite a show,” said a familiar voice from across the corridor. Andrea rounded the corner with her eyebrows raised impressively.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“We all make mistakes, Lottie””
“Well not me, okay?” Lottie groaned and slammed her fist into the wall. Pulsating pain throbbed across her knuckles. “I’m not supposed to do things like that anymore.” Her stomach sank with the realization. “I’ll never become a master Occlumens if I let my emotions run wild like that.”
They walked down the stairs silently. Andrea thoughtfully chewed on her bottom lip. “You know,” she said as they reached the bottom step. “That’s not very healthy”to hold onto your emotions like that. I mean, you were given a gift and you’re a very talented Occlumens, but you don’t need to restrain yourself all the time.” Lottie stopped and turned her head to look at Andrea. Andrea’s eyes were stern behind her thick glasses. “Look at Palmyitor. She doesn’t look very happy at all, does she?”
Frustration hit Lottie in waves. What did Andrea know about Occlumency? “That doesn’t matter; don’t you see?” Lottie said slowly as though she were explaining to a very young child. “We’re not here to be happy”we’re here to finish this war. Our feelings don’t matter”who cares if you’re sad or lonely? If being sad keeps you alive, what does it matter?”
Andrea surveyed her over the top of her glasses. “There are things worse than death, Lottie.”
Lottie opened her mouth, but closed it again. She couldn’t think of anything to say”there wasn’t anything. “I”I left my”I forgot to get my”my wand back from Palmyitor,” she finally said. She carefully avoided Andrea’s gaze by staring at the top of her head. “I’ll meet you in the common room later.”
Lottie turned around and heaved a sigh. She heard Andrea’s footsteps retreating to the Palmyitor clock. Andrea couldn’t be right, could she? Lottie tried to swallow, but her throat was still too dry. What could be worse than death?
The castle was silent as she ascended the steps to Palmyitor’s office. It was still lunch, Lottie guessed. Everybody must have been in the Great Hall. She was crossing the corridor perpendicular to the entrance when hushed voices stopped her in her tracks.
“There is no way to be sure,” said a voice. A nearby door stood ajar. “I doubt we will be able to find him, if he doesn’t want to be found.” Lottie instantly recognized that sneer. It was Malfoy.
“Here, let me help you with that,” said another voice”Hermione’s. She muttered an incantation that Lottie did not recognize. A sharp intake of breath”the spell must have hurt. “Rowe may not be the most gifted at Charms, but she certainly has a skill in Dark Magic.” Hermione paused. “But Naesa seems to trust him.”
“I would trust Fenrir Greyback before Naesa Palmyitor,” Malfoy said. “Have you ever wondered why she trusts him?”
“Because,” came Hermione’s voice, “she knew Dumbledore was on to something.” Lottie could hear a growing coldness in her words and terseness in her tone.
“And look where that got him. Dumbledore trusted anything on two legs.”
“That’s true.” Lottie heard Hermione’s footsteps draw closer to the door. “He trusted you and that didn’t do him any good.” Before Hermione left, Lottie rushed down the corridor, and turned out of sight.
Palmyitor’s door was before her. Lottie pushed it open with her shoulder.
“Rowe!” Palmyitor spun around and lowered her wand. Behind her, a shimmering, white doe stood in the windowsill, pawing at the ground.
“I”er”I was just”is that a Patronus?”
Palmyitor glanced sideways at the doe, which immediately lowered its head and evaporated into fine silver. “Yes. Yes, it is.” She turned back to face Lottie and raised her eyebrows. “What do you want?”
“I just wanted to get my wand back,” Lottie said, still staring at where the doe had disappeared. “I don’t like to go far without it.” Lottie winced, waiting for Palmyitor’s refusal”waiting for the lecture, maybe even the detention.
“What? Oh, yes”of course.” Palmyitor pulled the sycamore and walnut wand out of her pocket and tossed it distractedly in Lottie’s direction, her eyes still focused on the patch of wall where the doe had just disappeared. Lottie caught her wand and slipped it into her pocket. Something told her that she would not have gotten it back if the Patronus hadn’t been there.
“Thank you, Professor,” Lottie said as she left the office and shut the door behind her. Questions swam through her mind so quickly that she developed a minor headache. Who was Palmyitor communicating with? And who was Hermione and Malfoy talking about? These thoughts carried her all the way to the common room where she collapsed into an armchair next to Andrea.
“Well you sure seem to be in the festive mood today,” Andrea remarked.
“You’ll never guess what I just overheard,” Lottie whispered.
“Oh don’t tell me you’ve been eavesdropping again.”
“Well”yes, but Hermione and Malfoy were talking”they got kind of angry at each other, actually, but they were arguing about”about someone Palmyitor trusts. And about why she trusts him and”and things like that. Who could that be?”
“Who cares?”
“But then, when I got my wand back, there was a Patronus in Palmyitor’s office; you know, like the one she sent as a messenger to us in France. That must be from someone far away”she wouldn’t just communicate by Patronus to Maelioric or something. Who could she be talking to?”
Andrea paused; a frown etched across her face. “I think that the more important question,” she said, “is if they’re all talking about the same person.”
Halfway to Infinity by Eponine
Chapter Notes: Thanks so much to TheBird for helping me out with this chapter!
This chapter is dedicated to the amazing waiter from the Moroccan restaurant I went to last night. Thanks for the bread, sir!