Chapter Seventy-Six: Lottie’s Last Stand
Lottie woke flat on her back with a heavy pressure against her chest. The pain she had felt before was gone”the part of her that felt it had been ripped from her no longer ached. Back, though, was her bodily pain”physical pain, coursing up and down her limbs, pulsating dully in her core.
The place where she had been hit with the Killing Curse felt as though it had been kicked by some kind of horse. Her left forearm burned uncomfortably and her stomach felt like there was another human form slumped over it.
Slowly, she lifted an eyelid. There actually was another person slumped over her. Colm lay against her, mask cast to the side, but still in his Death Eater robes, sobbing. He hadn’t noticed that she was breathing yet.
Lottie shut her eyes and thought about all she had to do. She chose to come back and try to attack the Dark Lord. She couldn’t simply walk away, tempting though it was. She opened her eyes again and drank in the world around her.
Colm noticed her breathing a moment later. He picked his head up and stared down at her chest, which was rising and falling more steadily now that his weight was off it. He slowly turned his head and when his eyes made contact with hers; he sat back out of shock.
Lottie reached out a tentative arm and pushed herself to a seated position. She took a few deep breaths, gazing at Colm the whole time before turning and glancing around the room. Voldemort was gone. “Where did he go?” she asked.
“How”how”” Colm sat up and cleaned closer to stare at her. “How did you survive?”
“I didn’t.” Lottie turned back to him and blinked. “I came back.”
Colm grappled with this answer. He opened his mouth a few times and his eyes grew steadily wider as he thought. Lottie took advantage of this moment and, despite the ache across her entire body, launched herself towards him.
Her weight caught him off guard and he fell backwards. There was a cracking noise of bone against stone as his skull collided loudly with the ground. Lottie pinned him before reaching into his robe and rummaging through his pocket. She pulled out his wand and held it, pointed between his eyes.
He let her do it. Lottie knew he was fully capable of pushing her off of him, but he did not. After a moment, Lottie stood up quickly.
“Where are you going?” Colm asked.
Lottie turned to him slowly. She kept her Occlumency up and just watched him coldly for some time, not feeling anything. “I’m going to kill him.”
“You can’t.” Colm stood up suddenly reinvigorated and rushed towards her.
Lottie flicked his wand and with a large blast knocked him off his feet. “Don’t you dare come near me.”
“Please.” Colm reached over to push himself up. He was shaking all over. “Lottie, you can’t. He’ll kill you. I”when I thought I had lost you, it was”it was the worst.” He held a hand over his heart. “It felt like I was going to explode. I wanted to”I wanted to die. I hated myself.”
“You should.” Lottie took a step towards him and stared down the bridge of her nose at him. “You should hate yourself”after everything you’ve done and the people you’ve killed.”
Colm let out a quiet moan that was more like a wail and slumped over at her feet. “Please”Lottie”I never wanted to hurt you. I would do anything to keep you safe. P-please”why did you have to come here? Why couldn’t you have stayed safe where I left you?”
“I couldn’t hide there forever.”
“I would hide you.” Colm picked his head up and looked at her, his eyes rung red with tears. “I could protect you. The Dark Lord”he would never suspect it”and you would be safe. You could live with me””
“Do you honestly think I could live with you after everything you’ve done? You really are a coward,” Lottie said, cutting off his drivel. She spat on the ground beside him. “You would disobey your Lord? What are you even fighting for?”
Colm turned his gaze upward. All of his sorrow poured out at her feet. Lottie felt none of it. He moved his mouth for a moment before words came out. Finally, he said, “You.”
Lottie looked at him with no pity. All she could see was Andrea. Her death replayed again and again in her minds eye. It filled Lottie’s veins with venom and she raised the wand. Colm said nothing, just stared at her imploringly, filling his vision with her image before he saw no more.
“Avada Kedavra.”
The green light flashed. Something rushed past her. Colm fell down dead, just like Maelioric, just like Lottie’s parents, just like Andrea. Lottie looked at him without speaking. She had nobody to speak to.
Somewhere inside of her, she knew that Voldemort had not gone. He was still in the castle, just trying to kill every last person left. Lottie turned to the row of bodies along the wall. She reached into her pocket where Andrea’s glasses lay, still intact. She ran her finger over the frame and pinched the bridge as though maybe, somehow, that would bring her back.
Everybody was dead”everybody was gone. Lottie didn’t even know who she was fighting for anymore.
But she knew that she had to keep fighting.
She stepped towards the door and then stopped. She needed some way to disguise herself. She could not have gone to death and back again just to be killed by another Death Eater.
Lottie turned towards Colm’s still body.
She knelt down beside him and stared into his blank eyes. They had used to grow warm when he smiled. He used to look at her with so much joy, never understanding why she even stayed with him.
Lottie remembered him when they were young. He had been terrible, cruel, but he said it was because he had always liked her. Now she didn’t know what to believe. Was evil just in his nature?
She picked up the Death Eater mask that lay a few feet from his broken body, and glanced at her own pajamas. She ran a hand over Colm’s black Death Eater robes and grabbed a handful of fabric. Carefully, so as not to rip it, she pulled it over Colm’s head. It was so large, but it would have to do. She put them on.
They smelled like him and were still warm. Lottie glanced down at him. He looked oddly vulnerable, lying there in an undershirt and his ripping pair of trousers. She looked away from him, wiling herself not to think of his love for her or how he used to smile. His stiffening body did not move as she stepped over it.
Lottie placed the mask over her face. It covered her entirely, except for the two slits in the eyes. She reached back and put her hood up so it covered her head. The robes were so large on her that the bottom of the hem dragged on the floor and the sleeves covered her hands”but it would do.
She walked all the way to the door before stopping. She took a breath. This was it. Her entire life led exactly to this moment. She could not fail. She knew exactly what she had to do. She listened to her own breathing for a minute, purging the images of Colm, of Andrea, of Harry and her parents out of her mind.
She opened the door.
Outside was complete desolation.
Bodies covered almost every inch of floor space, both students’ and Death Eaters’. The remnants of Dark Magic lingered in the air, made it heavy to breathe. A few people were groaning, but besides that, it seemed that no one was alive.
Lottie stepped over Hermione. She walked around Lucius. She looked at the still Death Eaters. They didn’t move, but their masks glimmering in the colorful light made them seem oddly alive. She turned to face the hall. Voldemort was still here”he must be. The question was where he had gone.
Lottie looked up the main staircase that led to most of the classrooms and common rooms. Bodies lined these as well. Apparently, the battle had moved up through the entire castle.
She cast her gaze towards the other stairway”the one that led down to the dungeon and Palmyitor’s office. She didn’t know why, but she took that route. Carefully stepping over fallen students, she made her way to the top of the stairs, before descending down.
Her footsteps creaked against the old steps as she went. She took her time, waiting to be sure that she had an effective mental block. Nothing could go wrong. She thought of what Snape had taught her: think nothing, feel nothing.
She paused at the first landing. Palmyitor’s office door was shut, but she stared at it anyway. The next landing was the Palmyitor common room which was still locked from the inside, and below that were the dungeon classrooms.
If he was anywhere, it was here.
Lottie took another breath and willed every feeling of fear from her mind.
She reached out and turned the handle. The door swung open.
She was right.
Voldemort stood with his back to the door. He stared at the shelves and shelves of scrolls, the failed plots for his own demise. He stopped when he heard the door open and slowly turned around, a menacing snarl stretched across his face as he turned to face his opponent.
When he saw Lottie in Death Eater robes, his smile vanished. “I told you not to bother me,” he hissed.
Lottie paused for a moment. Behind the cold metal of the mask, she opened her mouth to say the incantation, but in this pause, Voldemort narrowed his eyes. He flicked his wand suddenly and sent hers”Colm’s once, but now hers”flying through the air.
Lottie was not particularly surprised. She knew it wouldn’t be that easy”couldn’t be that simple. And standing before him, defenseless, she was unafraid.
Voldemort watched her, the comfort in his inhuman eyes slowly fading away. Lottie reached up and pulled off her mask.
When Voldemort saw her face, he took a sudden lurch back. Lottie took advantage of this wave of emotion to begin to press against his mind. “You,” he said, his cold voice sounding suddenly unsure. “I killed you. I hit you with the Killing Curse.”
He raised his wand as though to try again, but Lottie quickly said, “It won’t work.” Of this she was not entirely positive, but her Occlumency was good enough that Voldemort would never know her doubt. “I cannot die until you do.”
Voldemort did not lower his wand. He seemed torn between forcing her to explain and trying to kill her anyway. Lottie applied more pressure to his Occlumency.
“Years ago,” she began, “you did something very stupid. You took Harry Potter’s blood to recreate your body.” She didn’t care whether he was actually interested or not; the more she shocked him, the weaker his defenses got without him even realizing. “By doing that you gave him a means to return if you killed him.”
“Harry Potter is dead,” Voldemort said. His eyes flicked behind her as if he expected Harry’s ghost to suddenly appear. “He did not come back. Or has the Mudblood’s champion been hiding all this time?”
“No, he is dead.” Lottie smiled slowly because she knew it would disarm Voldemort further. “He had a choice whether to come back or not, and he didn’t take it.”
Lottie paused. In that moment, Voldemort’s mouth opened slightly as he tried to compute what was going on. Again, Lottie leaned harder against his mental defenses.
“But I did,” she said.
Voldemort’s look of confusion transformed into one of pure terror. He gazed at her intently, and Lottie summoned even more energy to get into his mind.
“You are not Potter””
“But I’m his cousin.” Lottie let Voldemort deal with this shock himself. She knew it would be a powerful piece of information. She pushed against his mind even harder, but he was too concerned with this new revelation to notice.
To push him over the brink, Lottie added, “Two of your Death Eaters knew too. Snape knew for years”he never told you. Do you know that I was in your inner circle for months? Snape helped me get in.” She reached down and pulled up the sleeve of her robe. The Dark Mark shone as clearly as ever against her alabaster skin. “Are you sure you know where his loyalties lie?”
Voldemort looked down at her Mark in horror. He widened his eyes, as though wishing he were just imagining a Mudblood wearing his most valuable gift before him.
He looked up, and Lottie met his gaze. His block had nearly completely collapsed, and he had no idea. Lottie smiled. She mustered all of the energy she had left”every ounce of magic inside of her”and pressed further to destroy his Occlumency.
Voldemort’s eyes flickered. In a panic, he realized how close she was to his thoughts, how near to uncovering the vulnerable memories. It was a scramble for control. He tried to muster his remaining strength to block her from his mind, and for a moment they stood in a stalemate.
Lottie gave it a moment. She took a breath. He was pressing against her, trying to destroy her. If this happened, she knew it would be the end of her. But she also knew it wouldn’t happen. She took another breath and pressed forward with her Legilimency.
They stood with their eyes locked, but really so much more was occurring. Voldemort strained and hid and did everything he possibly could to keep Lottie away, but she did not relent. Her slow, steady progress at breaking apart his Occlumency was cruel, inhuman.
She gave one final push, and fell into his mind.
There were thousands of memories. The simplest, least emotional ones were up front, ready to be picked. Those were not what Lottie was looking for. She skimmed past all of the recent thoughts and went straight to the memories blocked away, most hidden so that he would never feel again.
Lottie smiled cruelly and picked a poignant memory. She shoved Voldemort into the throes of it, but made she that he saw it as an outside observer, not as a former self.
“Please, not Harry!”
A young, redheaded woman threw herself in front of the crib. Lottie focused the memory on her”her tears, her heartbeat, her panic. “No, please, not Harry.” She filled the memory with the woman’s desperation, plunging Voldemort into the depths of the consequences of his actions.
Lottie shifted scenes.
An elderly wizard with a long, white beard addressed a crowd of students. Voldemort was a young man, nearly whole, and sat silently, listening to the old man’s lectures.
“A student has been killed.”
Lottie selected several images of Voldemort’s helpless victims before returning to the speech.
“She was found in a girl’s bathroom…”
Lottie let the speech continue and conjured images to go along with it. Into Voldemort’s memory, she forced the image of the student’s parents, sobbing. Lottie selected their grief and expanded it, trying to fill Voldemort. Grief that he did not understand now consumed him. He drowned in it.
Lottie picked another memory.
Voldemort was a child; his soul was intact. The other children were crying while the stoic Tom Riddle stood before them. They were in a cave far from any adults or anyone who could save them. Lottie shifted Voldemort’s perspective and gave him the children’s fear, made him the vulnerable one.
Voldemort hadn’t felt genuine fear in nearly a century. He floundered in it, unable to control it, unable to escape.
Lottie switched memories.
She found an image of another red-haired witch, though not the same one as before. She sobbed and screamed shrilly. Tears streamed from her brown eyes as she stood helplessly before him. “I loved him,” she cried.
Lottie took her love and gave it to Voldemort. He convulsed under its strength. All of the sorrow for Harry’s loss, all of the love that Ginny Weasley had felt lived on. Lottie used it as a weapon. It filled Voldemort completely, burned his flesh from the inside out.
He was weakening”Lottie could tell. She returned back to the first memory, the original. Lily Potter flung herself before Voldemort, crying, sobbing, begging him to spare her son.
Voldemort was weak. His mental block had been destroyed and his mind altered. He had not felt anything, truly felt anything, for over a hundred years. What was left of his soul writhed and twisted, and in the back of his mind, in some distant corner, there was one tiny, flickering spark of remorse.
That was it.
Lottie immediately retreated out of Voldemort’s mind, knowing the danger of being in there now. Back in the present, she blinked and looked down. Voldemort had fallen to the ground, overcome with remorse. It was painful for him”physically painful.
He wrapped his long, spider like hands around his face. He was making loud, guttural noises that Lottie had never heard before. He was tiny. This enormous, evil wizard was reduced to a helpless animal, too far from anyone to be helped.
Voldemort was screaming now. Lottie did not move. She knew that she was witnessing magic beyond any that anybody could perform. Another person might have felt guilt. Another person might have pitied the man now suffering on the ground more than anything he caused his victims to suffer. Lottie did not.
She watched with an unblinking eye as Voldemort convulsed. He had become a monster”had given up most of his soul. But he had kept one piece. And that one, infinite piece was what Lottie had found; that one flicker of human was what destroyed him.
It went on for a long time. Lottie stayed clear from his vulnerable mind and watched impartially. She had a feeling that if she got sucked into it, that she too would be destroyed.
Voldemort’s body writhed and convulsed. Tears streaked down his white face and his mouth was wide in a silent scream of terror. Lottie knew that this was worse than any sort of Cruciatus Curse.
He was being eaten alive by magic. It wasn’t physically destroying his body, but Lottie knew the havoc it was wreaking in his tiny sliver of a soul. She thought of where she had just been with Harry”of the excruciating, unspeakable pain she had suffered there. She knew Voldemort’s would be much worse for his crimes.
Voldemort gave one last shudder and was still. He lay spread-eagle on his back, as helpless as a newborn child. His eyes flew wide with terror and his mouth sagged open. Lottie knew he was dead”and that he definitely would not come back.
She took a step away from him. She did not want to look at his face anymore. It unnerved her. She let out a slow streak of air and paused in the doorway of the office. She ran a hand over the wood of the doorframe, just for the sensation of touch again, just to make sure she really existed.
She had passed through this door countless times, had practically lived in this office to fight the war. And now it was over. It was all over. Lottie stepped out into the corridor.
Halfway to Infinity by Eponine
Chapter Notes: Thank you, coolh5000, for beta'ing this chapter! You're lovely!
This chapter, the last chapter, is dedicated to J. K. Rowling. Because of you, Jo, I am an infinitely better human. Your stories have been with me through my childhood, adolescence, and now adulthood; you made me a bookworm, a reader, and now a writer.
This is the last full chapter, but there is an epilogue on its way.