"You’re kidding," Selena said to Apollo. "Is this from him?"
Apollo hooted. Selena quickly untied the parchment from his leg and unrolled it.
I would have thought better of you. Your statement ‘I feel like a complete fool’ is now completely true, as it seems that you are as thick as ever. Once again, Selena, you’ve done your best to figure things out, and yet still come far off the mark.
He had written back. Again. Why? Her brother never did anything without a reason that he would benefit from. What was in it for him?
Selena frowned down at the paper, tracing her mouth in thought. She looked at Apollo. "Was Severus acting strange when you took his letter? Did he say anything to you?"
Apollo blinked at her.
"You know you’re losing it when your asking your owl to answer you, Selena," she muttered to herself. "Well, thanks anyway."
Selena quickly Apparated to St. Mungo’s, the letter still clutched tightly in her hands. She found Melissa and once again dragged her into the nearest ward, which was thankfully empty.
"Another one?" Melissa hissed as Selena shut the door and soundproofed it.
"Yeah," said Selena, handing her the letter. Melissa quickly scanned the paper, and did the unthinkable: She laughed. Just stood there and laughed.
That’s what friends are for, eh?
"Melissa!" Selena cried. "This is serious!"
"I’m sorry," Melissa managed to sputter, her shoulders shaking slightly as she continued to chortle.
"There’s nothing funny about this!" said Selena furiously.
"I know, I know," Melissa laughed, stuffing her fist in her mouth to silence herself. Selena gave Melissa a withering glare. After several seconds Melissa recovered from her giggles, so she removed her hand and said, "Look…obviously, this situation is about as far away from funny as you could get…but this – " she waved the letter in the air, a small grin on her face " – this is just…it’s...." Something in Selena’s expression must have told her she had gone too far though, for her face suddenly changed and she said, "I’m sorry."
"You should be," said Selena waspishly, snatching the letter from her friend’s hand.
"Selena…"
"No."
"Selena." Melissa took her shoulders, forcing Selena to look at her. "I am sorry, okay? But this…I don’t know…I mean…" she glanced at the letter lying on a bedside table "…some of the things he said…" Melissa smiled slightly. "I mean…it’s just so…him."
"Whoop-dee-do," said Selena spitefully, jerking away from her friend’s grasp. "‘It’s just so him’. Like I really wanted to deal with him during this whole mess. Some help you are," she spat out as an afterthought. "Very supportive, Melissa, very – what the hell does he think he’s doing, anyway? Is this some thing that You-Know-Who put him up to? Or is he just trying to butter me up, get me on his side? What – "
"Selena," said Melissa gently, "you can’t let this get in the way of your life."
"I’m not letting it – "
"Then let’s get back to work," Melissa cut her off, looking a little impatiently at her friend.
"Fine," Selena snapped, not very maturely. She stalked out of the room.
***
"Good morning, Severus!" Selena said cheerfully, as she skipped into the Common Room. Severus looked up at her from the armchair he was hunched in, one eyebrow raised.
"And then you say, ‘Good morning, Selena!’" she told him, sitting in a chair across from him.
Severus just shook his head and went back to scribbling in his book.
"And then I say, ‘How’re you doing today?’" Selena continued. "And you would say, ‘Fine, and you?’ Or, of course, if you were not fine, you might say ‘Not so good, but how are you?’"
"What are you doing?" Severus asked her.
"Teaching you manners. You seem to lack them."
"Ha, ha," Severus said dryly.
"Well, if you didn’t you would have said, ‘Good morning, Sel – "
"Alright, alright," Severus cut her off, waving a hand at her impatiently and continuing to write.
"You’re still writing in books?" Selena asked, sounding exasperated.
"I did it last year; don’t sound so shocked."
"I thought maybe you saw fit to change."
"Don’t get your hopes up."
"Why are you working today, anyway? It’s Saturday."
"So?"
"You don’t always need to be working."
"Why not? If I want to, I should have license – "
"You need some fun," said Selena firmly. "You work too hard." Severus rolled his eyes, but Selena paid him no mind and hurried out.
Once out in the hall, she realized she did not have any sort of plan. She wandered around aimlessly, passing various students who were strolling by.
Near the Gryffindor portrait hole, she suddenly heard a burst of loud swearing and jumbled curses. She peered around the corner.
"Regulus?"
Regulus Black immediately rounded on her, wand raised and gray eyes blazing.
"Oh, it’s you," he muttered, dropping his wand to his side and spinning around furiously, glaring at the wall.
Selena stepped closer. Regulus Black, a Slytherin in her year, did hang out with the crowd Severus usually spent time with, but by himself he wasn’t so bad. Sort of like Severus. Actually, she felt rather bad for him at times – his brother seemed to be constantly on his case, and Regulus often seemed quite unsure of what to do with himself. "Are you alright?" she asked warily.
"Yeah," said Regulus. "My brother just annoys the crap out of me sometimes – but I’m sure that’s something you can relate to," he added, with a sideways glance at her.
Selena laughed, a little bitterly. "Obviously."
"It’s that blasted Potter, too," Regulus continued, scowling. "They both were under that darned Invisibility cloak, so I couldn’t see where they were, and suddenly I’m breaking out into hives…"
"Invisibility cloak?" Selena broke in curiously.
"Technically, I don’t know about it," said Regulus, rolling his eyes. "But I’m not as thick as Sirius sometimes presumes me to be. They’re always yammering about it, they don’t even treat it like a secret. It’s almost as though they want everyone to know, and to realize how great they are."
The wheels in her head were spinning. "Do you have any idea where they were headed next?"
"They said something about Evans – " Regulus stopped, and glanced at her. "But I wouldn’t be getting any ideas."
"Oh?" Selena asked, giving him a innocent smile. "Why’s that?"
"Potter practically worships that thing," said Regulus, disgust written all over his face. "And Severus is proof of what they do to those that get on their bad side, Selena…if you steal it…"
"I’m not going to steal it, Regulus," said Selena, still using her bubbly, innocent voice. "What ever gave you that idea? I was thinking more along the lines of having James Potter loan it to me."
He raised his eyebrows skeptically. Selena’s charming smile remained for several seconds more, then her usual smirk took over.
"See you around, Regulus," said Selena, and she strolled away.
A little later that day, Selena hurried into the Slytherin Common Room, spotted her brother, and dashed towards him.
"Come on," she whispered.
"Come on what?"
"Under here." Selena unwrapped the tight bundle she’d been holding, and held it up with a flourish. She grinned at his bewildered face.
"Where’d you get that?" Severus demanded.
"James Potter."
"Potter gave you his – "
"No, I borrowed it," Selena said with a smirk.
Severus looked impressed. "That’s not something you normally do."
"I’ll take that as a compliment," said Selena, admiring her ‘borrowed’ item.
"How’d you get it?"
"You’re not the only one who’s good at magic," said Selena, pretending to be offended.
"But how’d you get past the Gryffindor portrait?"
"I didn’t. James left it in the Astronomy Tower."
"Just left it there? Even Potter can’t be that thick?"
"He was distracted by a certain Lily Evans," said Selena, her smirk growing wider. "So I took the opportunity to place the Disillusion charm on myself, and snuck along the walls to grab the cloak. So, are you coming?"
Severus’ eyes glinted maliciously, so Selena took that for ‘yes’, tossed the cloak over the both of them, and slipped out.
"There’s Black," Severus whispered. "What jinx should I use…"
"I didn’t get this cloak so you could hex all the Marauders," Selena hissed at him.
"Well, what else would we do?"
"I don’t know, get food from the kitchens? Give Mrs. Norris a kick?"
"Come on, Selena, this is my chance," said Severus quietly, as they stepped nearer and nearer to Sirius, who was attempting to look as though he were up to nothing, leaning against the wall. But the sneer lingering around his mouth told otherwise. "It won’t hurt him…not too much anyway…"
"Severus!"
"I was kidding."
"I doubt it."
Ignoring this last comment, Severus pulled his wand from his robes and muttered, "Langlock!"
"I’ve never heard of that spell," Selena murmured as they positioned themselves against a wall to watch the outcome.
"You wouldn’t have," Severus replied. "I invented it."
"Huh?"
"I invented that spell," said Severus calmly, watching Sirius with a mixture of vindictive pleasure and satisfaction. "It causes your tongues to become stuck to the roof of your mouth. This should be entertaining, I’ve never used it before. Black the guinea pig…" he sneered.
"You invented a spell?"
"That’s what I just said."
"Really? You actually created your own spell?"
"How many times do I have to repeat myself?"
"Wow," Selena breathed. "That’s – "
"Shh," Severus hissed. "Potter’s coming. Now maybe that idiot will realize he’s been hit with a jinx."
"Padfoot," James said, "did you take my cloak?"
"Nhh," said Sirius, looking over at his friend. He frowned at the strange sound that came from his mouth. He tried again: "Nhll," he slurred.
"You okay?" James asked him.
Sirius glanced at him again, then around the room. "H ‘ung," he said.
"What was the spell, mate?" said James, not seeming very concerned to find his best friend without the ability to speak.
Sirius seemed to decide talking was pointless and shrugged.
"So you don’t know when it happened?"
Sirius shook his head. The two were silent for a moment, then Sirius pulled a piece of parchment out of his pocket and hastily wrote something down, then shoved it in front of James’ face.
"Snape?" James read aloud. He looked at Sirius. "You think ol’ Snivillus did it? But you didn’t see him – ooo-hhh. You think he took my cloak?"
Sirius nodded fervently. Selena threw a worried look at Severus and motioned for them to get going, but Severus just shook his head.
"That greasy git," said James casually, casting his eyes around. "Well, we’ll get him sometime. I just wish I knew what that spell was, then I could counter it…" He frowned at Sirius. "C’mon, I’m sure Moony and Wormtail will have some ideas." The two left.
"How will they figure out the counter-curse?" Selena asked worriedly. "Only you know it, since you’ve never used that spell before…"
"Who cares?" said Severus, a satisfied smirk on his face.
"You know, maybe if you didn’t do so much to them, they wouldn’t pick on you either," Selena said repremandingly.
"This is one of those things you’re never going to get, Selena."
"I get it better than you might think," said Selena angrily. "And it’s true, you hurt them just as much as they hurt you. If you just cut it out for once – "
"Look," said Severus irritably, "why don’t you just stay out of my business?"
"You’re making it my business just by being related to me! People reach conclusions based on these things, and they think – "
"Does it look like I care what people think?" Severus demanded.
"No, but it’s about time you did!" said Selena. "If you would just lay off people for once and act at least a bit civil – "
"I’m civil when I need to be," said Severus, glaring at her. "Would you quit acting so superior?"
"You’re my brother!" Selena cried. "I’m not going to just watch you become – "
"Stay out of my life, Selena!" With that, Severus tossed the cloak off both of them and stormed away.
***
I’m still far off the mark, am I? Then what exactly is the correct mark? Because, as near I can tell, I’m on the mark perfectly. There’s no way you can keep denying it without solid proof, Severus. Fancy words don’t mean a thing. You’ve got nothing to back up your statements, so why don’t you just give it up?
Selena Snape
I must be crazy, Selena thought. I’m writing to a man who’s a Death Eater and whom I despise. Why? What for? She still could not answer these questions. She didn’t still care about him, she knew that…but there was a small part of her that couldn’t help wondering whether she would be unnerved should he turn up dead or be taken to dementors. She didn’t much like this part of her.
But there was another reason she kept writing: a part of her was curious. She wanted to see what Severus’ reaction would be, every time she kept writing back. Would he keep responding? Would he say something that revealed his true intention? Would he try and lure her somewhere? What would he do?
Then there was the question that followed each of these: what would she do? This was the question that scared her. So, not wanting to dwell on it, she Apparated to work.
***
"The meeting will now commence," said Minerva McGonagall. Everyone instantly grew silent.
"Well," said McGonagall, "we don’t have much to report on any whereabouts of Death Eaters or He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named."
The large group murmured uneasily.
"But," McGonagall continued, "we’ve been able to locate several large groups of dementors. Where there are dementors, there are often followers of You-Know-Who, to tell them orders and give commands." McGonagall pointed to several areas on a large map. "It’s not much of a plan, but I think it’s time we tried to do something – we haven’t done much since Albus – " McGonagall’s voice had become strained, but she quickly cleared her throat and said, "Perhaps we would be able to capture some Death Eaters. I shall split you up into small groups…"
So McGonagall divvied up the Order members into small groups. Selena was informed that she would be traveling to Bluebell Lake. She glanced over her assigned group members. Alastor Moody always made her feel rather uneasy; the way that even when she used Occlumency it felt as though he could still break into different parts of her mind with that eye of his. Remus Lupin she got along with though, despite their slightly awkward history.
The rest of the meeting past rather uneventfully, as the absence of their former leader had a much bigger impact than Selena had thought possible. Hagrid burst into tears near the end. Selena left in a bit of a hurry as the meeting closed. Melissa quickly chased after her and the two walked in silence for a little way.
"It felt so different," Selena said after awhile. "Without the two of them, I mean. I didn’t realize how much they affected the group until now."
"We all affect the group," said Melissa. "If anyone of us left, there would be a difference."
"Yeah," said Selena, "but losing the leader…and losing – you know…it’s so…"
"The war’ll be over soon," said Melissa quietly. "Then everything will be back to normal."
"I don’t think things will ever be back to normal. Not completely."
Melissa frowned, but didn’t comment.
"It’s not like I ever talked to him or anything while we were there," said Selena, absently kicking a pebble on the sidewalk. "But…it’s just…it’s just that I…"
"You miss him," said Melissa quietly.
"No," said Selena sharply, halting and rounding on her friend. "Of course I don’t miss him! I don’t want him around! I don’t miss him at all! I – "
"You miss who he was," said Melissa gently. "Not what he became."
"I don’t – "
"Yes you do, Selena," said Melissa kindly, her eyes shinning with unshed tears as she smiled softly at her friend. "It’s okay to love someone, you don’t – "
"I don’t love – "
"Selena." Now Melissa was starting to get agitated. "You need to get past this. I’m here to help you through this, and to assist you in getting past it. But I can’t help you if you aren’t willing to help yourself."
"This is ridiculous!" Selena yelled. "If you want to help me, you wouldn’t laugh at the situation, or make false accusations – "
"Damn it, Selena!" said Melissa, her face coloring in anger. "Why can’t you just stop pretending that this is all your fault, and that you don’t give a damn about Severus – "
"Why can’t you just stop being such a bloody fool? You – "
"We don’t need to have this argument," said Melissa coldly. Her face was still flushed, but her eyes were now hard and cool. She turned and began to walk onward. "We both know who’s right, and endless bickering won’t change it."
"Don’t you dare leave!" Selena screamed angrily. "Melissa, come – !" Too late. She had already Apparated away.