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Sirius sniffed Andromeda's gift (ginger biscuits with pumpkin icing), tossed it on the table, and closed his eyes, wondering what he'd just agreed to. His head, he was suddenly aware, was throbbing painfully from its recent encounter with the kitchen floor.
Damn her and her Auror negotiation skills, he thought, massaging it delicately with his fingers. Really! "Marauder's Oath." He made a mental note to hit Moony next time the ugly git showed his face.
But maybe, just maybe, Nym was right. She had a good head on her shoulders, and Sirius trusted her judgement as much as he trusted anyone's. If she was more worried about him racing off to Harry than Harry racing off to Voldemort... maybe he was getting worked up over nothing....
He stopped massaging his head, which only hurt more now, and rested it gingerly on the table.
Nym had grown so much while he was in Azkaban. She'd been, what, seven when he was locked up? And back then she'd thought him the Most Exciting Person in the World because he had a motorbike; a flying motorbike (okay, it was hard to argue with that). One time Ted gave her permission to ride along, and it had so obviously been the happiest moment of her young life... well worth the wrath they'd had to endure from Andromeda later, after Nym had been sent to bed....
Sirius hiccuped and absentmindedly traced a finger over the deep gouge marks in the table, not lifting his head. Now Nym was dating Moony. That idea had taken some getting used to. But it turned out she was a good influence on him, really good. He needed it, too, because he'd gone a bit... stodgy over the years, without Padfoot and Prongs around to set him straight.... And it really hurt Sirius to see an old friend so demoralized he could discuss Snivelly confiscating the Map from Harry without even cracking a smile. (Sirius loved that story; he'd roared with laughter and had a bounce in his step for days after hearing it.)
With Nym in his life though, Moony had finally started acting like Moony again, and Sirius no longer needed to mockingly call him "Professor Lupin" all the time.
He'd even managed to cajole the happy werewolf into going out on a full moon (though only after a great deal of whining about how his situation in Grimmauld Place was just like when Remus had to transform in the Shrieking Shack all alone). The two of them had quietly Apparated to the mountains around Hogsmeade at dusk; unfortunately, even with the hills perfectly devoid of human life, Moony had insisted on taking Wolfsbane beforehand....
Sirius snorted at the table. What kind of werewolf just curled up in a cave and went to sleep round midnight? Only Remus Lupin.... Well, he'd seen to it Lupin awoke under a pile of decapitated rat carcasses, each missing a toe, and an onslaught of petulant demands that he help carry them back for Buckbeak.
The whole incident had hit Sirius pretty hard though, throwing him into "fits of the sullens" so deep that even having Kreacher throw blood-crusted rats at Mother's portrait hardly cheered him. He desperately missed having an accomplice who really shared his lust for adventure (or, as Andromeda once called it, his "penchant for thrill-seeking behavior"); without Prongs, it was like some giant part of him was missing.
That's why he'd also been hit so hard when Harry shot down a simple plan to meet him in Hogsmeade, because it was a tad risky. He'd even felt miserable enough to give Harry the cold shoulder, though Molly nagged him about it incessantly (thankfully Ron left the reason why Sirius was mad out of his letter). He just couldn't stand the thought of the last surviving Potter lecturing him about responsibility instead of offering him a hand out of this forsaken place.
Sirius hiccuped again and decided to try lifting his head — an imprudent move that only made him wince. He wondered if there was any pain potion in the house. Probably not, but it didn't matter because it would've been ten years old... and most likely poisoned by Kreacher... not to mention, pain potions didn't go well with alcohol....
As he set his head back down on the table, his eyes landed on Andromeda's letter. Lacking the drive to reach out and get it, he sat there and contemplated it for a while instead.
Andi hadn't always liked him. She used to keep her distance back when he was Bella's protégé, not that Sirius could blame her in the least. He knew how it must have looked when he and Reg played at being Muggles, pulling funny faces and grunting like trolls, or when they dissolved in laughter at Bella's stories of "putting Muggles in their place." But he'd never even seen a Muggle before starting school, not knowingly anyway. They were just the stupid bad guys in story books, and he'd sort of imagined them looking more like goblins or house elves than proper wizards. So at the time, he figured Andi was just cold and grouchy for no reason. And she, like everyone else, must've thought him just a perfectly normal Black kid.
All that changed, of course, the day he got sorted. He could still remember it vividly: striding confidently to the stool, seeing Bella scoot over to make room for him at the Slytherin table just as the hat slipped over his head....
"Hello there."
Hi. You have to put James in Slytherin too.
"Who's that?"
James. James Potter. He's my best friend and he's standing in line. You have to put him in Slytherin too.
"What makes you so sure you're going in Slytherin?"
Cause Bella said so. And Mother. And Father.
"And you believe them?"
Yeah.
"But they don't get to decide. That's my job."
Uh, okay...
"Let me see, you certainly are clever, and you don't set much store by the rules. Your bloodlines are pure as they come."
Right.
"You're also very proud, and you care little for those you believe to be beneath you."
Huh?
"But I also see a lot of loyalty and bravery here... yes, you're not the sort who saves his own neck first...."
What's that supposed to mean?
"You would find more of your own kind in Gryffindor."
WHAT?
"It's true."
Are you INSANE? You know my family, they'd KILL me!
"It will be difficult, I won't deny, but you are remarkably strong."
You can't! You wouldn't!
"I'm sorry, but it's where you belong."
Wait, you don't get it! They'll actually KILL me!
"You'll thank me one day."
Yeah right!
"Trust me, you're a... GRYFFINDOR!"
Great. My blood's on your hands, Hat.
Most of his family had reacted quite predictably — his parents, for example, racing up to the school to insist there'd been a mistake and demand he be moved — but Andromeda's behavior had left Sirius utterly perplexed. She took to slipping him sweets from Honeydukes and loudly telling her sisters it was embarrassing enough to have a blood traitor in the family, could they please not remind the whole school by constantly hexing him in the halls. Equally perplexing had been how sixth year Ravenclaw and perfect stranger Ted Tonks had decided, seemingly out of the blue, to appoint himself Sirius's personal bodyguard.
Sirius smiled weakly. The ache in his head had grown duller, and he willed himself to sit up a little. He unfolded Andi's letter while helping himself to a ginger biscuit.
------
Sirius, Darling,
Nymphadora tells me you're not doing so well. She and Remus don't want to alienate you by bringing it up, but they're very worried about you. And please don't get angry at them for telling me, because we all care about you very, very much. All we want is for you to be happy, and healthy, and safe.
Obviously she can't speak the name of the place, nor can I find it until Albus Dumbledore returns, but I have an excellent idea where you are, and believe me, I more than anyone know how hard this must be for you. But chin up, Darling, you've got to stay positive, because we will sort all this out, and things will get better. Soon.
I won't spell it out and risk angering you further, but you know what I mean when I say: please don't do this to yourself. There are too many people who love you and can't afford to lose you again. Not just me and Ted, and Remus and Nymphadora, but also Harry Potter. You're the closest thing to a parent he's ever known, Sirius, and if nothing else, you need to stay strong for him.
So please just hang in there a little longer, Sweetheart, alright?
Loads of Love,
Andi
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Sirius reread the letter twice before crushing it in his fist. Then, face stinging hot, he groped for his bottle, and drained it out of spite.
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A/N--Someone's being a bit of a brat, I know, but Andromeda anticipated as much and suspects her message will still sink in.
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Sirius Black and the Drapery of Doom by capella_black
Chapter Notes: Memories of Tonks, Remus, Andromeda, and the Sorting Hat. :D