Confessions and Duels
- So wishing him a Happy Easter, she watched him go off in the direction of the Ravenclaw common room, realizing she had an odd feeling in her stomach... something that she had never experienced before and she knew very well that it had nothing to do with her anger. -
It was another full moon the day after Easter and Lily was definitely feeling the worst of it. She felt so sick she couldn’t even gather enough strength to get herself out of bed. She tried many times to get out of bed, but finally gave up when she fell off the bed and hit her head on the nightstand in the process. She was knocked out for ten minutes before Rachael found her. She spent the most part of the day dozing in and out of fitful sleeps, not eating anything when her mother appeared at the door asking if she was hungry. She strongly doubted that anything she ate would remain in her stomach.
Lying on her bed, she gazed out the window at the steadily darkening sky. She was going to have to get up soon. She didn’t think she would have the energy to get from her room, down the stairs, and out to the yard. Rachael would help her though, so she didn’t have to worry. She just wondered if this transformation would be worse than the one in January. Between the ones from then to this one, her transformations had been no big deal. It was now early April and she hadn’t had a transformation different from her usual ones. This fact drove the idea of Snape tampering with her potion completely out of her mind. There was just one thing that was bothering her.
She had, once again, infuriated Snape before he gave her the Wolfsbane Potion. She knew she shouldn’t have said anything, but she couldn’t help it; it was as if some unknown force had taken her over. Walking past the Potions classroom the day before Easter break started, she caught Snape yelling at Jacob Lawrence. Snape was telling Jacob that he was a sorry excuse for a wizard, all because he had one mishap with the potion he was making. It wasn’t any of her business to step in, but the way Snape was yelling at him infuriated her. He was making it sound as if Jacob was the densest wizard in the world.
So, in her anger, she stepped in between Snape and Jacob and told the Potions Master off, earning herself twenty points deducted from Gryffindor and a detention the day she got back from break. Then he shooed them off, making it known that he had a potion to be working on and he didn’t need their presence. Walking out of the dungeons with his friend, Jacob told her he was grateful for what she did, but he couldn’t stay and talk because he had to go pack his trunk so he’d be ready to leave the next morning. Wishing him a Happy Easter, Lily watched him go off in the direction of the Ravenclaw common room. As she hurried to Gryffindor Tower, she realised she had an odd feeling in her stomach. It was something that she had never experienced before and she knew very well that it had nothing to do with her anger.
Maybe this was why she didn’t question Snape when he handed her the Wolfsbane Potion later that night. She had spent the next few hours wondering what the feeling could be, only coming to the conclusion as she was dropping off to sleep. There were rare few feelings that she had never felt in her life and one of them was liking someone more than normal. To most people her age this feeling was very familiar, but to her it was something foreign. She wasn’t sure what to do. She didn’t get the chance to talk to Jacob, since she couldn’t find him on the Hogwarts Express the next day and didn’t see him on the platform either. She just decided to talk to him about it when they got back to school.
Closing her eyes as her stomach lurched painfully; Lily rolled over onto her back and listened for her mother’s footsteps, which came momentarily. The door to her room opened and in walked Rachael, whose face was deadly pale.
“Come on, Lily,” she said quietly.
Lily didn’t want to move.
“Can’t I just do it here?” she moaned, feeling a painful stab in her skull.
Rachael’s eyes widened slightly when she heard this, remembering very clearly that the last time her daughter was reluctant to go into the shed resulted in something horrible. She shook the thought out of her mind and asked again.
“Please, Mum?” Lily begged. “I can’t even move.”
“Lily, you have to go down there,” said Rachael firmly.
Lily wanted very much to shake her head, but discovered she didn’t even have enough vigor for that. Rachael knew that her daughter couldn’t and wouldn’t go down to the shed. So she marched over to the bed, knelt down, grabbed Lily’s arm and swung it over her shoulders and helped her down to the backyard. Rachael had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. This wasn’t good; this was exactly how her daughter acted when it all went wrong. Though Lily’s resistance wasn’t to the same extent as last time, she was still resisting with words, as she couldn’t do it physically. All the way down the stairs Lily begged to transform in her room, saying she had the potion, she couldn’t bring any harm on her mother. Rachael couldn’t listen to this. If she heard anymore she would wind up doing what her daughter wanted and she could possibly be bitten.
When they made it out to the yard, Lily finally stopped begging, but went grudgingly inside the shed. The look on her daughter’s face made Rachael feel horrible as she chained her up to the wall. Leaving the shed, Rachael made herself comfortable on the porch, knowing that she would have to wait the full moon out with Lily. She only hoped that what she thought was wrong.
She gazed up at the sky, waiting for the moon to fully rise, when she would hear the ghastly sounds of the transformation. However the sounds didn’t come when the moon had fully risen. Curious, Rachael made her way to the shed and peered in through the window. What she saw baffled her beyond all reason, the werewolf was already there. It was as if Lily had simply, painlessly morphed into a werewolf in a split second. She couldn’t understand it. Even with the Wolfsbane Potion the transformation took more than a few seconds, and Lily still would groan in pain since the potion couldn’t dull it. What’s going on?
The werewolf stood up and gained its bearings, sniffing around for human flesh that it could bite, only to find that there was none in reach. The werewolf ran wildly around the small space, desperately looking for something to eat. She soon realised that it was a useless effort. So she bit and scratched herself. Rachael cringed, waiting to hear her howls of pain. But the howls never came. Rachael couldn’t figure it out, Lily would always howl in pain during her transformations. She was, yet again, biting and scratching herself when her human mind would definitely argue against it. Utterly confused, Rachael retreated to the porch; her head resting in her hands as she listened to the silence of the night and, for the first time, was disturbed by it.
Rachael woke the next morning, still sitting outside, and found Lily outside of the shed. How did she get out? Rachael wondered as she approached her daughter. Lily looked up when she saw her mother and tried standing up, but her legs argued against it, so she remained slumped against the shed wall. Getting a closer look at Lily, Rachael noticed that this full moon must have been a bad one, though nothing compared to the January one. Lily’s hands needed to be bandaged again and she couldn’t help but notice that there were several new bites along with the original ones. All along her face were rather long scratches that were dripping blood. Her eyes were swollen (for some strange reason) and when Lily tried to say something her voice came out in a small rasp.
“How’d you get out?” Rachael asked.
“I dunno,” Lily strained truthfully. She closed her eyes tight and took a deep breath. “I was just out here.”
“What happened?” Rachael asked, greatly concerned.
“I don’t know. My transformation took no time at all and I had my werewolf mind, but I couldn’t howl or anything…”
Rachael nodded, she knew this much, apparently Lily only knew this much as well.
“Come on, let’s go inside and get you cleaned up,” said Rachael.
Lily tried standing up, but once again she couldn’t. Rachael bent over to help her up, but Lily argued against it, saying she would rather stay outside than be locked up inside for the day. She waited patiently for her mother to return with the necessary potions and new bandages for her hands. She knew she shouldn’t have taken that potion; she was just too preoccupied to even give her cautions a chance. She should have pretended to take it and suffered through a normal transformation like Remus did before the potion was invented. But, no, she didn’t even bother to think about what could happen to her.
Rachael came out only moments later, her arms laden with bottles of potions and a roll of bandages perched precariously on the top. It only took a few minutes for her to down all the potions and only took her mother two minutes to rewrap Lily’s hands. Rachael was inspecting the shed once she was done when she heard Lily talking to someone.
Curious, Rachael poked her head outside the door and saw a tall boy with black hair talking to Lily. It seemed, from the way they were talking, that they had met before, so she knew he was a friend from school. Coming out of the shed, Rachael cleared her throat loudly. Lily and the boy looked towards her.
“Oh,” said Lily shortly. “Mum, this is Jacob Lawrence, a friend from school. Jacob, this is my mum “ Rachael Lupin.” The boy named Jacob smiled and shook Rachael’s hand. “He was in the area,” Lily explained.
“Were you?” Rachael said, letting her curiosity slip into her voice.
“Yes,” said Jacob. “My dad’s planning on buying some space in Hogsmeade for his business and I remembered Lily telling me that she didn’t live too far from there, so I thought I’d see how she was feeling.”
“Oh, well that’s very nice of you. I’m going to be inside, want me to bring the dog out, Lily?”
“Yeah, thanks,” answered Lily appreciatively.
The two waited for Rachael to come out of the house. When she did, she placed Nimbus on the ground and he dashed over, diving into Lily’s lap. She grinned and scratched him behind the ear. “Nimbus, I’d like you to meet my friend, Jacob,” she said. Nimbus barked at the boy and walked over to him, indicating that he would like to be petted. Jacob, however, stepped backwards.
“I’m allergic,” he explained when Lily raised an eyebrow at him. He sneezed loudly, scaring the dog away.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Go on, Nimbus; get Mum to open the door for you.”
Nimbus readily obeyed her and ran back to the house.
“When did you get him?” Jacob asked, making conversation.
“On my birthday, in January. My mum snuck him into St. Mungo’s. I’ve always wanted a dog and he’s a good one.”
“Yeah, he looks like a nice dog, and a hyper one.”
Lily laughed. Looking around, she remembered that she had promised herself that she would talk to Jacob about something very important when she got back to school. She didn’t expect him to show up sooner, but now he was here, she had to talk to him. It was awkward though. She never pictured it being like this: right after a full moon when she couldn’t even stand up to look him in the eye. She had to do it; she had to now before she chickened out.
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something,” she said quietly.
“Really?” asked Jacob interestedly.
“Yeah, sit down, it might take a while.”
Jacob sat down and looked at her strangely, dreading that it might be something he had done to make her angry. He doubted he did anything, but you could never tell with Lily.
She struggled with her words; she didn’t know exactly how to word what she wanted to tell him. How could she make it so that it didn’t so odd?
“I’ve been having this weird feeling lately,” she said at long last.
“Have you? What is it?”
“That’s the thing, I didn’t know at first what it was, but now I do. I’m just not sure how to say it without it sounding strange.”
“Does it, by any chance, concern me?”
“Yes, and that’s why it’s so strange. I mean, I hardly ever talked to you before this year. Now we’re getting to be pretty good friends and that’s why I’m finding this so awkward.”
Jacob nodded, though feeling slightly frustrated with her stalling. He had a thought as to what it might be, and, if truth be told, he was happy that she felt that way. But, if she was having such a hard time letting it come out, did she really mean it? He wanted her to mean it so much, but he had to admit he had his doubts.
“What are you trying to say exactly?” he asked.
“That’s just it, I don’t know what to say,” said Lily in a frustrated voice.
Jacob rolled his eyes and turned around, ready to leave. “Well, when you figure it out, tell me.”
He began to walk away at a brisk pace when Lily yelled at him, “I think I love you!”
Jacob stopped walking and his eyes widened. He couldn’t believe his ears; he was right… He turned around and saw that Lily looked absolutely mortified at what she had just said. Her face was burning red and if her eyes could have been any wider they would’ve been the size of a Quaffle. Kneeling down in front of her, he tried to make sense of this.
“There, I said it,” Lily muttered, her face still apple red. “Now just tell me what you think and, please, make it quick.”
She closed her eyes, waiting for him to tell her she was crazy so she could get her humiliation over with. She certainly did not expect what happened. Jacob put his arm around her neck and quickly kissed her. Lily was too shocked to say anything when they broke apart.
“I can do that slower if you like?” Jacob offered, grinning. Without waiting for an answer, he pulled her into a tight embrace and kissed her long and slowly. Lily could have stayed that way for eternity, but soon found herself becoming short of breath and pulled away. Lily thought her face would’ve been fiery red but, to her surprise, she found that it was perfectly fine. In fact, she didn’t feel the least bit embarrassed about what had just happened. It seemed that Jacob wasn’t either, judging by the large smile on his face, making it look as though he had wanted to do that for years.
“Yeah, slower was better,” Lily joked.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” he said, almost breathlessly. “And I’ve wanted to hear that from you for so long and I wanted to say I love you for so long.”
“You have?”
“Yes. There was always something about you that I liked. I didn’t know what it was, but I didn’t care. I just knew I liked you, maybe loved you. And now I know it’s true.”
“I hardly gave you a second thought until you came up to me in the Great Hall that day…”
“But now you do and that’s all that matters.” He pulled her into another brief kiss and neither of them noticed Rachael standing on the porch watching them, completely shocked. One part of her wanted to go down there and confront them, but another part of her resisted. She knew this was what her daughter wanted and needed. She had found someone who could love her and completely ignore the werewolf side of her, even if it was showing clearly on her face through the scars.
Jacob left after a while. The two had been talking about something Rachael couldn’t hear. She waited until he was definitely gone before going down to her daughter, who was looking quite pleased with herself. Lily didn’t notice that her mother had dropped down beside her and was watching her intently. It took her a few minutes to look and find her there, a grin playing on her lips.
“I take it you and Jacob had fun?” she said, hardly able to stop herself. Lily Evans had done the same exact thing to her when she found out about her and Sirius.
“You were watching!” Lily accused, though not sounding infuriated. She seemed t find it rather funny in fact.
Rachael nodded, not bothering to conceal her smugness.
“Oh, it was rather sweet,” tormented Rachael in a false sentimental voice.
“How much did you hear?”
“Most of it. I opened the door to let Nimbus in and couldn’t help but overhear you say ‘I think I love you!’ What happened? I thought he was just a friend.”
Lily’s face reddened for the first time since she had said that.
“Well, yeah he was a friend. Now he’s a bit more,” she answered simply. “What? Are you going to say he can’t be?”
Rachael laughed slightly she shrugged her shoulders. “Depends. Was that your first kiss?”
“Well, yeah…”
“I can’t say anything then. Mine was when I was fifteen, and you’re eighteen.” Rachael stood up and looked around; it had to be about midday now and it was getting uncomfortably hot. She didn’t want Lily to stay out in the heat. “Do you think you have the feeling back in your legs?” she asked.
Lily didn’t know but she didn’t think she did. So, when she stood up, she wasn’t surprised to find that she didn’t. However, she was surprised to feel the surging pains in them, going from the very tip of her biggest toe and all the way up.
“No,” said Lily, falling back to the ground. She wondered what she could have done to them to make them hurt like that. When she rolled up the leg of her pants, she saw they looked completely normal; they bore no scratches or bites. The sun was shining brightly in the afternoon sky and there was no shade Rachael could possibly provide. Rachael remembered the spell that Griemer used at St. Mungo’s to get Lily from the lobby to the Serious Bites Ward. Excusing herself for a mere minute so she could go and retrieve her wand, Rachael hurried off to the house.
Lily watched her go, trying to ignore the stabbing pains that plagued her legs. She decided that it was do her best to keep her mind distracted. She really couldn’t believe what had just taken place; she didn’t expect that kind of reaction. She did know he felt the same way about her, but she never expected him to kiss her a second after finding out. She didn’t mind, it just caught her off guard. How was she going to live this down when it reached the ears of her friends? Hermione would go on saying she knew it from the beginning. She had no doubt Ron and Harry would find it absolutely hilarious. Well, they weren’t ones to laugh since both of them had kissed girls long before she ever kissed a boy.
Rachael reappeared at her side only one minute later with her wand. She quickly waved it, muttering the charm and Lily was suspended in the air. Lily looked around and saw her mother grinning, probably thinking the entire thing was hysterical. She knew very well that Lily didn’t like being suspended in the air, even if it was for her own good, and besides, it was embarrassing. There was no arguing against it at the moment; she didn’t want to stay out in the heat. The morning weather was fine, but now the weather was becoming stifling.
Once inside the cool house, Rachael dropped her daughter down in one of the armchairs and asked if she was hungry. Lily declined the offer of any food, as she found her stomach churning unpleasantly. Sitting in the living room, attempting to stretch her legs without them shooting pains through her, she wondered if she would be fit enough to go back to school the next day. Her trunk was packed and ready to go, so all she had to do was wait the day out, hoping that her legs would feel better. That was the only thing preventing her from getting on the train; if it wasn’t for that, she would be positive she was going back. At least I don’t have to go to St. Mungo’s, she thought appreciatively. She hated being stuck in the hospital, even if it was just for a few weeks. She grew to despise sitting in a bed with no means of escape. This was one of the reasons she hoped she would find the cause of her condition, so she could avoid going back there.
Rachael was bustling about in the kitchen, no doubt preparing lunch for herself, and whistling merrily. Lily had to say, Rachael had made a drastic mood swing, going from being irritable to almost cheerful. She knew her mother would never be entirely happy until she, Lily, was completely cured, but she had to admit she enjoyed seeing her mother smile. She didn’t even mind the smug smile she had when she caught her and Jacob. It was a nice improvement compared to how she had been when this all started. Maybe Rachael was growing to accept what might happen and was trying to make the best of things like Lily was trying to do. Lily liked that, she liked it a lot; it was better than the both of them moping in self pity until the end.
“Mum, am I going back to school tomorrow?” Lily called into the next room.
“I don’t know,” Rachael answered truthfully. “It depends on if you’re feeling better.”
“I feel fine.”
“You know what I mean.”
Lily knew she shouldn’t have even bothered asking, as she knew very well that would be her mother’s response. Stretching her arms out behind her, she shut her eyes and hoped that when she woke up she would be okay to go to school.
Indeed when she woke up later that day she found that she was able to walk around and that her legs hardly hurt. Because of this, she found herself sitting on the Hogwarts Express waiting for the train to make its way back to the castle. She was alone in her compartment, as Harry, Ron and Hermione had spent the holiday at the castle, while she was forced to return home. She at least hoped she would run into Luna or Neville, but it seemed that the both of the remained at the castle as well. She didn’t remain alone for too long. The compartment door slid open just as the train was leaving the platform and she saw Jacob standing in the doorway.
“Do you mind?” he asked, looking pointedly at the seat beside her, which was now playing host to her trunk.
“Sit,” she said, removing her trunk and placing it on the seat in front of her.
He took the seat and looked around, twiddling his thumbs awkwardly.
“How was your Easter?” he asked conversationally. They had never talked about the holidays the day before, so he was curious.
“Alright, I can never get too many giant chocolate eggs. How was yours?”
“Good. I can never get enough of listening to my dad’s shop talk,” he added sarcastically.
“Did he get the space in Hogsmeade?”
“Yeah he did. When I got back there yesterday he was all happy and took us out to celebrate. It was fun… until he started prying.” Lily didn’t even need to ask what his dad had started prying about. “Yeah, he wanted to know where I went,” he elaborated. “So I told him I went to visit a friend who lived real close to Hogsmeade. You’d think my mum would step in for me, but she used that annoying voice parents use when they think they know something “ ‘and who is this friend?’”
“And what’d you tell them?”
“I didn’t tell them anything, which was really stupid seeing as how they figured it out just by my not saying anything. My mum had to shriek out for the whole place to hear ‘my little boy has a girlfriend!’ And, if she could have, I bet she would’ve burst out crying.”
“Bad tears or good?”
“Good, good ones, yeah. She’s been telling me I’m too old to still be single.”
Lily laughed at that, as Mrs. Jameson used to tell her thing same thing. The moment she turned sixteen that was all she heard.
“Then it got bad,” Jacob said, resentment evident in his voice. “So, my mum asked what your name is and I just casually said ‘Lily Black’ and my mum said ‘oh what a pretty name.’ My dad, on the other hand…”
Lily cast her eyes down to the floor; she knew exactly what Mr. Lawrence would think when he heard that name.
“So, what’d he say?” she asked unnecessarily.
“He said that he doesn’t want me to have anything to do with someone who has the surname Black. Even when I said you had grown up with a different surname and with a different family and that your father was innocent and that you’re the sweetest girl I know, he still didn’t budge.”
“Well, then what do we do? He’s not going to budge like you said… and I don’t want your dad to be mad with you just because of me.”
She knew she didn’t have to ask what to do; the answer was obvious in her eyes. She would just have to forget that anything had happened and that she had never even met Jacob. She didn’t want him to have a fight with his father, seeing as how she knew that it wasn’t fun to be in an arguement with a parent.
She hated this. All because of her name she couldn’t have what she wanted and neither could someone she cared about. She knew Jacob’s father was being unreasonable and he had no right to judge her, but she didn’t want him to be mad with his son. She cared about him too much to allow that to happen. If doing this was going to ruin their father-son relationship, she didn’t want that to happen. It hurt for her to say it, but she had to.
“I don’t care what he says,” stated Jacob defiantly. “He doesn’t know you; he can’t judge you by your surname. And if he doesn’t like that, then too bad for him.”
Lily shook her head; she didn’t want him to fight with his parents because of her. As much as she hated herself for saying what she was about to say, she had to for his well being.
“Do what your dad says,” she muttered her voice breaking as she did so.
“W-what?” stuttered Jacob disbelievingly.
“Please, just listen to him. I-I don’t want you two to be mad at each other on account of me.”
“No, you don’t mean it, you can’t.” Jacob knew she didn’t mean it. Just by looking into her eyes he could see the regret she was feeling. She only wanted to do what would benefit him, and that meant giving up something he knew she wanted.
“I don’t want to mean it,” she admitted, struggling to remain calm. “And maybe… maybe if your dad comes around we can… we can pick up where we left off.” Taking a trembling breath she looked away from him, not wanting him to see what this was doing to her.
He wasn’t going to be embarrassed by seeing her like this; he turned her around and looked her straight in the eye.
“You don’t have to do this,” he said imploringly. “I don’t care if my dad and I fight.”
“But I care if you do, especially if it’s all because of my surname. I care about you too much to do that to your family. And if I have to give up what I want… then I will.”
“Lily…”
“Just listen to me, please. And, like I said, if he comes around… we’ll start over.”
Jacob opened his mouth to say something, but Lily shook her head, she was going to stand her ground on this. Jacob sighed hopelessly. He knew she was set on this and he wanted to respect her wishes, even if it meant giving her up to please his father. He pulled her into a hug and kissed her gently one last time before breaking apart.
“I still love you,” said Lily quietly.
“I know you do.” He stood up and made his way to the door, grabbing his trunk on the way. “Bye, Lily.” With that, he was gone.
Lily stared at the door, though not seeing it. She couldn’t grasp what had just happened. She had told him to forget he ever met her so he could respect his father. Yet she had just given up the best thing that had happened to her in a long time. She loved him and that was why she did this, she wanted what was best for him. What about her, though? What about what was best for her? It took her every nerve she had to do what she did and it was slowly eating away at her.
She felt a warm tear slide down her cheek, but she didn’t bother to wipe it away. She hated herself for doing what she did. The look in Jacob’s eyes when he heard it… she didn’t think she would ever erase that from her memory. He looked slightly betrayed, but understanding, though he couldn’t keep the sadness out of his voice. What if his father never came around? Then they would go on pretending they had never known each other forever. She didn’t think she could do that. She would have to think of something to do that would make Mr. Lawrence see reason. There just had to be something.
Whatever she could do, she didn’t know what it was at the moment and she didn’t want to think of it either. Pulling her knees up against her chest, she buried her face in them and spent the remainder of the ride sobbing and thinking of what she had given up.
The train screeched to a halt in Hogsmeade station and Lily joined the crowd of students making their way to the carriages. Lily was thankful for the fact that she was able to scrounge up an empty one, she didn’t feel like sharing one with anyone. She took the offer up and sat alone in the empty carriage, trying to shut her eyes and block the night out.
The carriage ride seemed to take no time at all. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of the castle. Making her way up the steps, she heard the last voice she wanted to hear, especially when she heard what he had to say.
“Aw, what’s wrong, Black?” said Draco Malfoy, sounding as though he knew perfectly well what was bothering her.
“None of your business, Malfoy,” she retorted coldly.
“Was your boyfriend that bad of a kisser that he made you cry?” he continued, acting as though he hadn’t heard her.
“You little spy!” she snapped. “Do you have nothing better to do than spy on my personal life?”
“As of right now, your personal life is of my greatest interest. My father is very concerned in seeing if the Black Family can live on.”
“Shove off, Malfoy.” This time it wasn’t Lily who spoke. Malfoy spun around to see Jacob approaching him, a look of fury in his eyes. “Why don’t you just leave her alone? Is your life so pathetic you have to bother someone who doesn’t even start with you?”
“I don’t know, Lawrence. It’s just fun to bother filth like this,” Malfoy snarled.
That was the limit for Jacob. He raised his fist and was about to bring it down into Malfoy’s face but Lily, who had predicted this, grabbed his arm and held it back. Jacob tried shaking his arm free, but Lily wouldn’t let him punch Malfoy just because of her. Malfoy watched this spectacle before him and burst out laughing, which seemed to only infuriate Jacob more. Lily, sensing something bad was going to happen, pulled him away.
She was surprised by Jacob’s reaction to say the least; she hadn’t even expected him to do anything. She could also see that Jacob was shocked with himself as well.
“Thanks,” she said meekly.
“You’re welcome,” he said in a somewhat bitter voice. “I guess I’ll be going then.”
Before Lily could even say anything else, he raced up the stairs in the direction of the Ravenclaw common room. Lily knew dinner was going on in the Great Hall and, even though she wasn’t hungry, she wanted to see some friendly faces. Entering the Great Hall she saw Harry, Ron and Hermione sitting at the head of the Gryffindor table. Hermione was holding up a copy of the Daily Prophet and was flipping through the pages while Harry and Ron were looking over her shoulder. She took her seat in front of Harry and read the headline on the front page; it was something about new Ministry tactics that were going to be taken in the battle against Voldemort.
Hermione ruffled the pages, not looking up until she noticed Lily sitting in there. She smiled and set the paper down, folding it carefully as she did so.
“Lily,” she said brightly. “How was your Easter?”
“Fine,” Lily replied, doing her best to make her voice sound pleasurable.
“Did you and your mother make up?” she asked casually, as though she was merely questioning the weather conditions.
“Yeah, we did. She’s not mad at me anymore.”
Hermione nodded happily and picked up the paper again. Only a few minutes later she set the paper down again and announced she was heading back up to the common room. Harry and Ron decided to go with her, only after inviting Lily to join them in a game of Exploding Snap. She declined the offer; she was not much of an Exploding Snap player and she was extremely tired. She followed them up to Gryffindor Tower and entered a rather loud common room (“Gobstones”). Looking around for the source of the excitement, they noticed on the notice board that Professor Dumbledore was, once again, starting a Dueling Club in the Great Hall on Mondays. The first meeting was scheduled for the next evening at seven. The students had to admit that they were a little wary about this club, as the first time they had a dueling club (in second year) it had not come off very well.
They decided to check it out anyway. So at seven o’ clock sharp Monday evening they found themselves standing in a familiar setting. The four House tables that usually crowded the hall were pushed back against the walls. In the centre of the room was one long table, on which Professor Snape stood. The Slytherins were greatly amused by this, but the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws knew they would have to be cautious if this man was going to teach them to duel. He was surveying the hall with a satisfied smirk on his face. Once the clock struck seven he called for silence with the simple wave of a hand. Instantly the hall fell quiet and the students listened aptly to their professor when he began to speak.
“As you all are aware of, Professor Dumbledore has decided to restart the Dueling Club we had attempted five years ago. Luckily, we now have a more… competent Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher who will help us with the procedures. Professor Westley,” he called over his shoulder. Professor Westley, a middle aged man with pitch black hair, came up behind him and surveyed the students. “We will be teaching you the basics of dueling, using some defensive spells such as the Disarming Charm.” He and Westley turned to face each other. “We are now in the appropriate dueling position. We will start with the Disarming Charm. Now, we will bow and hold our wands at the ready.”
Professor Snape and Professor Westley bowed low, though Westley’s eyes never moved from the Potions Master, which the students thought was a smart idea. Once they were both straight, they held their wands before each other and before Westley could even open his mouth, Snape shouted,
“Expeliarmus!” and Westley’s wand flew out of his arm and landed in the crowd of students.
“As you can see,” Snape sneered, clearly enjoying this, “your professor has been disarmed.”
“Yes, I believe they noticed, Severus,” said Professor Westley in what he hoped to be a kind voice. “Now that we have disarming down, maybe we should allow the students to practise amongst themselves? Please divide yourselves into pairs and work on this spell for ten minutes. Then we will move onto our next spell.”
Chatter broke out amongst the students as they ran to partner with someone before Snape took the liberty of doing so for them. Lily paired with Hermione, who proved to be quite a challenge to disarm. The fact that Lily was feeling ill didn’t help matters. After finally managing to disarm Hermione she found herself glad that the professors were calling for their attention once more. The students gathered around the table and just as Professor Westley was about to teach them another charm, Professor Snape interrupted him.
“I think now is the perfect time for two students to demonstrate this charm for all of us,” he announced, his sneer going past a few select students, Lily being one of them.
“A good suggestion, Severus,” said Westley warily. “However, I recall being told by the Headmaster that the last time two students dueled each other, neither came off for the better.”
Several of the students nodded heartily at this statement, but Professor Snape chose to ignore them.
“Then we will not use the same pair,” he said, making it seem as though this was the perfect solution to the problem.
Westley opened his mouth to argue but Snape shoved past him and began fishing through the many students. Almost instantly, he picked Pansy Parkinson from a group of giggling Slytherin girls and she dashed up to the table. He took a little longer deciding on the second student, though everyone knew that it was going to be a girl. As Ron conveniently mentioned to Harry as Snape was approaching, not even Professor Snape would make a boy and girl duel. Ron turned out to be right because at that very moment Snape grabbed the scruff of Lily’s collar and pulled her up onto the table against her will.
Professor Westley, who had been watching Snape look over the students, did not seem pleased at the pair Snape had chosen. He went over to the professor and whispered something in his ear, which made Snape sneer.
Professor Westley raised an eyebrow in Lily’s direction.
“Snape,” he said in an undertone. “I really don’t think you should allow her to-”
“Oh, Westley,” said Snape in a voice loud enough for all to hear. “Are you implying that you don’t believe Miss Black is able to duel?”
The Slytherins howled with laughter as Professor Westley’s face turned a faint shade of red.
“No,” he retorted. “I know that Lily is quite capable of dueling, I’ve seen her duel before. I just don’t think she should right now, considering the circumstances.”
Lily, who had been listening to this conversation, stepped forward and vouched for herself.
“I can duel,” she said, though disagreeing with what she had just said. She couldn’t even disarm Hermione after fifteen tries. What made her think she could disarm Pansy Parkinson, a Slytherin who would stoop to the lowest to humiliate or harm someone. Professor Westley looked doubtful about this, but Professor Snape simply clapped his hands together and told them to begin. The two professors stepped backwards and watched as the two girls bowed quickly, holding their wands at the ready. The two were silent for a moment, each waiting for the other to make the first move. So when Lily saw Pansy open her mouth, she yelled out,
“Expeliarmus!”
Pansy’s wand flew out of her hand and narrowly missed hitting Snape in the face. The hall burst out laughing when they saw this, but stopped when they saw Snape seething with anger. Pansy also didn’t seem to find this funny because she took this opportunity to send off the Leg Lock Charm. Caught off guard, Lily’s legs locked and she fell to the floor, landing hard on her face. She felt her nose crack painfully and tried with all her might to stand up, but it was useless. Again the Slytherins howled with laughter as Harry, Ron and Hermione hurried over to their friend’s aid. Hermione helped Lily roll herself over and cringed when she saw blood flowing freely out of Lily’s nostrils.
Professor Westley hurried over and lifted the Leg Lock Curse and with a quick wave of his wand, Lily’s nose was healed. Pocketing his wand, he marched over to Pansy Parkinson and proceeded to give her the longest lecture known to man. It ended with her doing lines for a month. Pansy broke through the crowd, looking utterly miserable, but no one pitied her. What she did was uncalled for.
“Okay, I think that’s enough for tonight,” said Professor Westley, dispatching the students. “Same time next week. Good night.”
The students all exited the hall, talking loudly about what had just taken place.
“That Parkinson had no right,” said Ernie Macmillan pompously.
Lily, Harry, Ron and Hermione liked Ernie, but they found at times he could be a little overconfident and pompous. This time he was right in it.
“No she didn’t,” Lily muttered. She grabbed a tissue out of her pocket and attempted wiping off the large amount of blood on her nose. “Then again, Snape should’ve listened to Westley.”
“Well, you said you could duel,” said Hermione reasonably.
“I know, but they should know better than to listen to me.”
Hermione couldn’t argue with that, as the staff knew they shouldn’t listen to Lily. Lily still shouldn’t have said she could duel when she knew she couldn’t. They lost Ernie as he turned towards the basement to go to the Hufflepuff common room, while they continued to Gryffindor Tower. Once inside the common room, Lily made a beeline to the dormitory, hoping to wash off the remainder of the blood on her face. After ten minutes of scrubbing her face, it was clean and she went to change for bed.
Lying in her bed, she stared out the window directly across from her bed. Did no one think her capable of doing anything? Professor Westley thought she couldn’t duel, when she proved that she could successfully disarm her opponent. Hermione didn’t think she could duel, and neither did Harry and Ron, even she didn’t think she could do it and yet she insisted that she be allowed to. Would anyone think her capable of doing what she used to? Maybe they would when she got better, if she got better that is. She could deal with having a sickness her whole life, but she would be able to deal with it better if she was allowed to do the things she did before she got sick. Was that too much to ask? She didn’t think it was.
With that thought in her mind she fell into a fitful sleep.