"Oh dear," Hannah murmured faintly, mouth open. "What on earth do they hope to accomplish by this?"
In the corridor ahead, Alice, Renny, and Lucy were at the center of a commotion. Alice was strolling around smiling and holding a poster that said, "Sign up here for C.A.A.A.T., or Campaign Against Acne-Afflicted Teens", Renny was handing out flyers, and Lucy was writing down names of the people signing up. Renny walked over to Eloise and Hannah.
"Care to join C.A.A.A.T., Abbott?" Renny asked rather nastily, pronouncing the acronym like 'cat' and brandishing a flyer in Hannah's face.
Hannah took the flyer, and, glancing at it briefly, said, "I'd rather eat slugs. What's all this about, anyway?"
"Oh, too bad," said Renny brightly. "You're really missing out. It's our new campaign against students with acne. In our opinion, they're ruining the beautiful halls and grounds of Hogwarts. Since we are, as you know, quite popular, we're sure we'll get many people signing up just because we're so wonderful, but we don't mind. We appreciate all of our supporters." Renny gave a wide smile that couldn't have been genuine. "Well, I mustn't be wasting time talking to non-supporters!" She walked away, completely ignoring Eloise.
"What does that flyer say?" Eloise asked Hannah curiously.
"Why does it matter? It's just a load of rubbish," Hannah said.
Eloise replied, "I know that, but I still want to see it. It's best to know what they're up to."
Hannah shrugged, handing Eloise the bright pink pamphlet.
Eloise scanned the flyer, taking in the curly gold lettering at the top of the page that read, 'Do you wish the halls and grounds of Hogwarts should remain unblemished and beautiful? If so, you should join C.A.A.A.T. today! Our organization is all about preserving the school we love!' She read the rest of the flyer and then laughed heartily.
"What?!" Hannah asked, startled.
"Nothing, it's just that flyer--it's absolutely ridiculous! That's the funniest thing I've seen all day," Eloise said, chuckling. "You know, I wonder if they actually think this would upset me...if they do, that's pretty sad."
"Well, I figured it would upset you," Hannah said hesitantly. "You're usually pretty mad when people make fun of you."
"I suppose so. Honestly, though, Campaign Against Acne-Afflicted Teens? That's pitiful. I can't believe they could get anyone to sign up."
Hannah shrugged. "Well, they [i]are[/i] popular. Why, I have no idea, seeing as they're bints, but they're popular. They probably promised that people who signed up would be best mates with them or something."
"I'd say so--Renny even admits they'd have people signing up because, in her words, they're 'so wonderful'. I can't imagine they'd have anyone signing up to 'preserve the school we love'. It's utter nonsense!"
"Absolutely," Hannah agreed.
*****
Ten minutes later in the Charms classroom, Flitwick was conducting what was shaping up to be a lengthy lecture on Cheering Charms. Normally, Eloise would've been fascinated, but today, she didn't even realize what was going on until she felt Hannah elbow her sharply.
"What?"
"Flitwick called on you--he asked who the inventor of the Cheering Charm was," Hannah hissed.
"Oh, er, sorry, Professor. Felix Summerbee invented the Cheering Charm. Also, sir, I've read he was so dedicated to perfecting it that because he continually tested it on himself, he acquired a chronic case of hiccups, a common side effect."
"Very good, Miss Midgen! Five points to Hufflepuff for excellent research! Now, class, if you could form pairs and practice the charm..."
Eloise and Hannah paired up and began practicing. "What had you so distracted, anyway? You weren't paying a bit of attention," Hannah asked, waving her wand aimlessly.
"It's not like I missed a crucial lecture. We studied Cheering Charms last year, remember? I suppose Flitwick's trying to prepare us for our O.W.L.s, as I've heard they'll be on it. Anyway, I was trying to figure how we could use C.A.A.A.T. to our own benefit."
Hannah raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me? What are you aiming to do, join?"
"Don't be ridiculous," Eloise said airily. "I just want to put Renny, Alice, and Lucy in a tight spot, but I don't want to tell a teacher."
"Why not? They'd get plenty of detentions."
"I'm playing fair. Besides, I don't like tell-tales, and I have no intention of being forced to despise myself. Do you have any ideas?"
"I don't want to be involved. Whatever you're planning on, it sounds like a good way to get into trouble, and I, for one, want to win the House Cup. Hufflepuff hardly ever does, you know, but we still have a chance."
"Highly unlikely, but I won't force you. However, I might remind you that it's possible to create trouble without getting caught." Eloise grinned slyly. Hannah frowned, but didn't say anything more. Eloise took the opportunity to hit Hannah with a Cheering Charm, who then smiled broadly and somewhat vacantly. The two girls continued practicing with minimal conversation until the bell rang.
*****
After a long and dirty Herbology lesson, Eloise and Hannah traipsed back up to the castle for lunch. As they walked into the Great Hall, they spotted Marietta and Patrick and hurried over to join them.
"Marietta, you won't believe what Alice and Renny have done! Lucy's involved, too, but they're the main ones. They've started this stupid campaign, and it's absolutely ridiculous. It's called C.A.A.A.T. and--" Hannah stopped suddenly, realizing Marietta wasn't listening. "Marietta?"
"Hmm?" Marietta glanced up. She apparently hadn't realized Hannah and Eloise were standing behind her, because she said, "Oh, hello. Have a good morning?"
Hannah rolled her eyes. "Listen. Have you talked to Renny?"
"Why would I talk to Renny?" Marietta looked rather puzzled.
"Because you told Eloise you would tell Renny that everything's fine between you and Eloise, and to keep her too-perfect nose out of other people's business. Well, you didn't say that exactly, but you [i]did[/i] say you'd talk to her," Hannah said somewhat accusingly.
"I did, didn't I? Sorry about that...I'll talk to her. Have a good morning?"
"Oh yes, we had a terrific morning. Positively hilarious, between Renny's campaign and Cheering Charms," Eloise chuckled.
"We did Cheering Charms last--what d'you mean, Renny's campaign?"
"She's started this thing called C.A.A.A.T., or 'cat'. It stands for the Campaign Against Acne-Afflicted Teens, and their supposed mission is to rid the school of students with zits."
"You're kidding, right, Loie?" Marietta raised her eyebrows. "Honestly, it's a bit impossible."
"Actually, it's quite possible. If not, it's possibly the only impossibility ever managed, though personally I believe that every impossibility is actually possible."
"Ha, ha." Marietta rolled her eyes. "Classic you, that is. Anyhow, she can't possibly pull it off. Why on earth would anyone join a thing like--what was it? Oh yeah, 'cat'."
"In Renny's words, people are dying to sign up because her, Lucy, and Alice are so 'wonderful'. We figured they promised people who signed up that they would be on friendly terms with them, but we don't know for sure. That's why I asked if you'd talked to Renny," Hannah finished rather snippily.
"I said I'd talk to her, and I will, okay? Look, you don't need to get on my case. No offense, of course."
"Of course," Hannah replied coolly.
"Hannah, Marietta? It's okay--you don't need to fight. Seriously, Hannah, it's fine," Eloise cut Hannah off as she opened her mouth. "I'm sure Marietta will talk to her. Even if she doesn't, I'm not going to fuss about it. It's only Renny."
"Right," Marietta said, pushing her hair out of her eyes. "Could you pass me the ham, Patrick? Thanks." Patrick grinned at Marietta, then glanced down the table to Alice.
Hannah pursed her lips and glanced at Eloise worriedly. She saw the same thought reflected in Eloise's eyes. [i]I don't trust him...[/i]
Eloise Midgen and the Acute Acne by eowyngirl
Chapter Notes: An interesting new organization appears...
Chapter Endnotes: Please review!