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Married To the World's Biggest Git by AIsForAntlers

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Chapter Notes: So here it is. And let me introduce you to my favorite character, James! So this is just sorta a chapter to introduce James. Not much happens yet, but I promise it will.
When my mother dropped Petunia and her friends at the shopping center near the Leaky Cauldron, a very curious thing happened. I said goodbye to her and she only shrugged silently. Surprised, I wondered why she was acting that way, but now that I look back at that moment, I know that it was just jealousy. The whole way to Diagon Alley, mum was raving about how wonderful it was that I had been accepted to Hogwarts. Neither of us could stop talking about how amazing it was going to be when I could do magic at home.

Now that James and I are married and he has met Petunia, he says she's a neat freak and needs to be hospitalized for being an obsessive compulsive if her house is that clean. Maybe James is only upset because we're not allowed to visit her since he accidentally knocked over a vase and made a complete mess. When he pulled out his wand to fix it, she threw a royal hissy fit and screamed for us to leave and never have contact with them again.

She never use to be that uptight; we used to be the best of friends. We would play in the mud together when we were little, once even having a contest to see who could last the longest without cleaning her room.(Of course, with my competitive nature, I won.) I suppose, thinking about it now, Petunia started her obsession with all things clean and normal after she found out that I was a witch. I wonder if it was her way of proving to my parents that she was just as good as me.

Well, anyway, my mum and I walked into the pub Professor McGonagall had told us about and were quite startled by Tom, the bartender. He had teeth then, although he had lost half of them already and looked as though he would lose more soon. We weren't quite sure if we could trust his gummy smile, but I didn't think there was any other option.

“Excuse me, sir,” I started, wondering how formal I should be. "Do you know how I can get into Diagon Alley?”

“Oh, Professor McGonagall sent you?” At my nod he continued. “This way, I'll show you.”

He led us to the back of the pub and tapped one of the bricks with a wand that he pulled out of his shabby robe's pocket. I stared as the wall melted before my eyes. As Mum gasped, I realised how much easier it was for me to believe in magic than for her. I had done some magic before and Severus had been there to explain most things to me. Tom pointed us to Gringott's Bank, where Mum shrieked at the sight of a goblin even before we approached the counter to exchange our money. A young boy that looked my age heard my mum cry out and watched us curiously as we were handed new coins. He had obviously figured out that I was a Muggleborn and that my mum was a Muggle because he came up to us as we were leaving the building.

It is impossible to call an eleven-year-old hot, but I could definitely see the potential. The boy had the cute face that every eleven-year-old has, but what surprised me was his eyes. They were a deep hazel colour that stared around wide-eyed at everything. When the boy came up to us and I looked at him, I blushed after seeing the simple look of pleasure at meeting me. I tried to imagine why he had felt that way.

When I looked up again he thrust out his hand,saying, “My name is James Potter. It's a pleasure to meet you. I couldn't help but notice your mother's reaction to the goblin and thought I might be able to help you with your shopping.”

I was really surprised at how well-spoken he was. He had obviously been exposed to higher social classes and adults a lot. I looked up at my mum and we both shared a glance that said, “Well, we don't know our way around, and I'm sure nothing bad can happen from it.”

"We would love your help.” I smiled at him and tried to sound as classy as him,continuing, “My name is Lily Evans. You have probably guessed that I am Muggleborn with not the slightest idea of where to go. It would ease my mind greatly if you would guide us through Diagon Alley.”

“Wow. You fake it just as well as I do,” James said and smiled. “I hate being formal, but my mum insists that I use that type of language around adults. Anyways, I assume that you're going to be a first year at Hogwarts this year, meaning that you'll need just about everything that I'll need so I'll show you around.” He flashed another grin at me. “Stay here. I'll go find my mum.” Then he was gone before I could get over the fact that he was treating me like he had known me all my life.

“Mum?” I looked over at her to see a disgusted look on her face. Not knowing why, I asked, “Are you okay?”

“What?” She tore her eyes off of the spot where James had been and said, “Oh yes. Everything is fine... I just don't know if I want you going to school so far away if all the boys act like that...” She drifted off and I couldn't believe my ears.

“Mum! You can't be serious!”

“No, but I am!” a voice said right behind me. I jumped and turned so quickly that I fell over. Luckily (in his eyes, I'm sure), James had come back just in time to catch me.

“Thanks,” I mumbled and looked at the ground, embarrassed that he had to stop me from falling.

“Sirius! I didn't think I'd see you today again. And... that joke wasn't funny even the first time you told me it. What happened to you dear old mum dragging you off?"

James obviously had met this boy earlier that day. I couldn't really make sense of their conversation.

“You know me... always the funny one!” The other boy flashed a grin at me, then turned back to James. “I ditched Mum so I could do my actual shopping. I think I finally lost her when she went down into Knockturn Alley.” He looked at me again and must have seen my blank face because he then asked James, “Who is this? Are we having company during our fun afternoon of shopping?” The last sentence was dripping with sarcasm. I got the impression that he didn't like to shop very much.

“This is Lily Evans. She's Muggleborn, so I was going to help her do her shopping, if it's okay that she comes along.” He turned to me and with a grin continued, “This is Sirius Black. We met earlier today. He's going to be a first year too!”

“Sirius,it's so great to see you again! Does your mother know you're still here?”

A very sweet-looking woman with light brown hair that was cut short and beginning to gray had walked up and hugged Sirius. Her eyes were the same a James. Hazel with the perfect amount of curiosity thrown in. Then she turned to me smilingly.

“So this is the 'really pretty girl' the has agreed to the amusing presence of my son."

Surprised, I blushed, not really knowing why. I had never actually thought about myself as being pretty or not.

James quickly gave his mum a look that said, “How could you tell her I said that?”

"Be careful about encouraging James. He'll never leave you alone now.” Mrs. Potter smiled and I knew she was kidding, but Mum didn't seem too happy.

“My name is Karen Evans. It's a pleasure to meet you. It's nice to meet someone that my daughter will know at school. It was very kind of your son to offer us help,” my mum said, making herself smile.

“I'm Sarah Potter. Would you care to get a drink? James and Sirius know this place like the back of their hands; they can show Lily around.”

Mum couldn't help but smile at her, genuinely this time, and agree to go.

“Lily, I want you to be very careful. I don't know anything about this place, so make sure you stay close to James and Serious, was it?”

“Sirius Black, at your service, ma'am. Lily will be very safe with us; we never get in trouble.”

I felt a little uneasy about this, but I knew we would have fun.

“I'll introduce you to my husband. He works at the Ministry of Magic and talks to non-magical people all the time. He'll love to meet you,” Mrs. Potter said as she and Mum walked away. James's mum yelled over her shoulder to him, “Meet us at the Leaky Cauldron in an hour. One hour, you hear?”

“Yes, Mum!” James yelled quickly, then turned and grinned. “Excellent, they're gone. Now the fun can begin.”
Chapter Endnotes: Edit: Again, I edited a few things in this chapter as well. For the most part it is the same. And as for them meeting in Diagon Alley, I promise it will all fit in with the memories of Snape in the 7th book. Enjoy! :)