Chapter 13: Lost
Lily spent the next month in a blur of happiness. She was finding that life with James Potter as her boyfriend was easier than she would have imagined. She could really be herself around him, and relax into the enjoyment of their final year at Hogwarts.
One afternoon, however, things changed drastically. Lily was attempting to finish her Transfiguration essay for Professor McGonagall, but James had decided long ago that this was far too boring a past-time.
“James!” Lily protested, as he tickled her ear with the end of his feather quill. “Will you quite that! I need to finish this.”
“No you don’t. You don’t even want to finish it. You just think that you should. Am I right, or am I right?”
“It amounts to the same thing. Distracting me will only postpone the time when my essay is finished. Then I’m at your disposal.”
Sirius laughed. “Bad move. You don’t want to go giving Prongs that kind of power. He’ll never relinquish it.”
Sirius was reclining on the sofa opposite, absent-mindedly shuffling a deck of exploding snap cards. “Want a game?” he asked James, sitting up and pulling a table towards them.
“Sure, why not.” James finally put his quill down, much to Lily's pleasure, and leant forward to engage in the game. As Sirius began dealing the cards into two separate piles, Ellie and Yves approached. They dumped their bulging bags on the floor and pulled up chairs to sit by the table Lily was working at.
Lily looked up. "Where have you two been?" she asked distractedly.
"Library," Ellie answered. "We were set a horrible Ancient Runes essay this morning."
"I'm attempting McGonagall's now," Lily said, sighing as she picked up her essay and leafed through the pages. "Not very successfully," she said finally, setting it back down on the table.
"At least you've started it!" Yves said, pulling out books from her bag and heaping them in a pile in front of her. "I dread to think how long it will take me to read this lot."
Sirius, who had just succeeded in a hand of Exploding Snap that had blown up in James's face, turned to the girls. "You work too hard. I finished McGonagall's essay last night. It only took me half an hour." He said this proudly, taking more cards out from the box and dealing them out.
The girls ignored him, heads bent over their books and quills racing.
After half an hour, by which point the pack of cards had run out and both James and Sirius were looking much worse for wear, Ellie threw down her quill. "It's no use, my brain's going round in cirlces." She reached in her bag and pulled out a fresh pack of cards. "You boys in?" she asked, moving to sit on the sofa where the James and Sirius were.
Sirius, who wore an expression that was a mixture of pride and shock, nodded his head and moved over to make room for Ellie.
Just then, a small girl approached the table and cleared her throat. “Lily?” she questioned nervously. Lily looked up from her books at the girl, although her hand continued to move across the page of parchment that was her essay. “Yes?”
“Uh, I have a message for you from Professor Dumbledore. He says you are to meet him in his office as soon as you can. It’s important. Apparently,” she added hastily.
Lily rubbed her eyes. “Right now? My essay…” The girl shrugged. “I’m just passing on the message.” She turned on her heel and skipped off to find her friends.
James, who had been sitting with a puzzled expression on his face, now turned to Lily. “Well, come on then. Let’s go.”
“She didn’t mention you, James.”
“I know, and Dumbledore can kick me out of his office if he wants. But I’m coming with you anyway.”
Lily smiled. “Sure. Thanks James.”
Sirius looked up. “What’s all this about? Are you in trouble?”
“I hope not. See you later, Sirius.”
“Bye.”
Lily and James left the Common room and made their way up the flights of stairs to the stone gargoyle that guarded Dumbledore’s office. Lily looked at James. “Do you think the password’s the same as it was at our meeting?”
James shrugged. “Pear Drops.” The gargoyle leapt to the side and he smiled. “Seems to be.”
Lily returned the smile and then preceded James through the door and onto the moving spiral staircase. When they reached the top, Lily knocked hesitantly on the door. She always felt nervous about entering the Headmaster’s office, even for a Head of School meeting.
“Come in,” rang the voice of Albus Dumbledore from within the room. Lily turned the handle and stepped into the light of the office. James was just behind her.
Dumbledore was seated behind his desk, but he stood as Lily entered. “Ah, Miss Evans. Thank you for coming so swiftly. And Mr Potter…” He gave a slight nod to James, as if authorising his presence. “Come and take a seat, both of you," he said, conjuring up an extra chair for James with a lazy wave of his wand.
The pair sat opposite Dumbledore, who seated himself in his chair and lowered his half-moon spectacled to survey them. “I will cut to the chase. I do not think it fair to dawdle in these circumstances. Miss Evans, I’m am very sorry to have to tell you this, but I received a message this morning from your sister, which-“
“Petunia?” Pure shock was on her face. “Wrote to you? She would never…”
“It appears that in special circumstances, your sister can put aside her difficulty in accepting the magical world. I assure you, I received a letter from her this morning. It was brief. I am afraid to say that your parents have died.”
Whatever reasons Lily imagined Dumbledore having for summoning her here, this was certainly not one of them. She refused to believe it. “No. No, that’s a lie. No, they’re not, they’re not… they haven’t….”
James reached over and put his hand reassuringly on Lily's shoulder. He looked at Dumbledore. “Are you sure?”
“I am very sorry, yes. Your sister wishes that you return home for the funeral. I of course give my consent, together with my deepest sympathies.”
“How?” Lily managed to ask.
“Your sister writes that there was an explosion which occurred in town. The Muggle Prime Minister tried to cover it up from the Ministry of Magic, but we are not as blind as they seem to think we are." He paused, and surveyed Lily. "I had my suspicions. Even with what Muggles call “terrorists”, explosions are not common events. The Ministry was on the case far sooner than the Muggle authorities were. It was most defiantely the work of Death Eaters, although their motive is as yet unknown. Whilst this may sound harsh, it was most likely for pure fun. Your parents were simply in the way. I am deeply sorry.”
Lily's head was spinning as Dumbledore said all this. She didn't want to hear it. Without thinking, she took a great gasping breath in and held it. She didn’t know how else to react. Letting go of her breath would be like opening floodgates to her emotions and her tears, and mark an acceptence to what she had just been told. She couldn’t do that. Her parents couldn’t be dead. They wouldn’t leave her alone in the world. They couldn’t. So she held on. Her head started to feel light and her vision blurred. Somewhere that seemed far off in the distance, a voice was calling her.
“Lily!” It was James. He took her shoulders and shook them hard. “Lily, you’re going purple! Breath, Lily!”
Dumbledore stood hastily, knocking his chair over in the process. “Leave her alone, James. Shaking her will produce nothing. She will breathe when she is ready to.”
“She’ll choke then!”
“Don’t underestimate her, James. Let go, please.”
James did as he was told. Dumbledore swooped down in his place and looked into Lily’s eyes. “It is ok to grieve, Lily,” was all he said.
His words reached her and clicked something into place. She gasped as if pulled from the ocean, collapsing forwards onto Dumbledore’s shoulder. He patted her on the back as she took great shuddering sobs. “You take over, James. I must arrange for some transport to take Miss Evans home.” James sidled in between the two, and Lily transferred her sobbing to James’s shoulder instead. She clutched at him despairingly.
Dumbledore left his office. It was just the two of them. James didn’t know what to say. He said nothing. Lily continued to cry.
After what seemed like an hour, her breathing calmed and she lifted her head from his shoulder, looking into James’s eyes. “I’m sorry. For making a fool of myself. You can go if you want.”
James looked at her and sighed. “I wouldn’t leave you right now for anything, you silly girl.” He pulled her into a tight embrace.
Dumbledore entered and they separated. He walked around to his chair, picked it up, but did not sit down. “I have arranged for the chimney in your parents’ house to be temporarily hooked up to the Floo Network. You can access it from my fireplace right away.”
Lily stood and wiped her hands over her tear-stained face. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and her head ached from all the crying, but she retained the utmost dignity as she said, “Thank you Professor. For your kindness and help.”
“Not at all. We all need a helping hand in such circumstances. I am sure you will find the next few weeks rather difficult, but it is best right now for you to be with your sister.”
James took her hand and squeezed it tight. He smiled reassuringly at her, not knowing how you say goodbye at such a time. He settled for “See you then,” before releasing her hand and moving towards Dumbledore.
Lily took a handful of Floo powder and threw it into the fireplace. “14 Newman Lane,” her voice rang clearly into the room. There was a moment of purple mist, and she was gone.
Love Conquers by dumbly_dorr
Chapter Notes: Sorry to introduce sadness just when everyone was happy, but at least it keeps the story on its toes!