Ron’s eyes welled with tears as he stared at me, his hands shaking in what appeared to be anger. My breath was catching on some mysterious item in my chest, and I collided with the forest floor. It was there that I let another sob escape me, this time for Ginny. Persephone was tucked somewhere in the far corners of my mind, where I knew she would haunt me for the rest of my life. But this…this was more than Persephone. This was Ginny, the girl that I had loved before Hermione, the one that I had allowed to get away. Never again would I see that smiling face. Never again would that red hair whip in the wind as she laughed at a clever joke made by her brothers. She was dead, gone forever. Dead. Died. And it was because of me again. Everyone I loved, everyone I cared about…they always ended up buried somewhere in the ground, their lives snuffed out because of their relationship with me.

“Why did you come?” I asked Ron when I could speak. Another cough rose up within my chest, and I heaved. I tasted the blood in my mouth and forced myself to swallow, like the disease was swallowing me. From up above, Ron sniffed and wiped his sleeve.

“They promised me, Harry,” he told me, “that they would keep them safe. Me, Ginny, my entire family. They promised that if I joined up, they wouldn’t let the disease touch me and that I could…could take whatever revenge I wanted to.”

My brow furrowed in confusion. Wiping my mouth, I took a breath and forced myself up. My knees wanted to buckle, my mind threatened to slip back into the white world of madness as I steadied myself on my feet. I fought it with all of the power I had left and stared at him, shaking my head.

“What are you talking about, Ron?” I asked him, and I saw that there was grief swirling in his eyes. And something else was there too, something I couldn’t recognize at first. But then I felt the connection, for it was an emotion I knew all too well myself. Self-remorse. He looked away from me and up at the trees, listening to the wind blow through them. He walked away for a moment, and I felt my eyes slide back into my head. A voice was speaking there, and I wanted desperately to listen to it.

Traitor, it said. We kill traitors, Harry.

I had to ward it off, had to fight it for now. There was nothing more important than keeping my wits about me, if for nothing more than to protect Ron from my murderous hand. What was it that had made the voice scream? What was it that kept it away? Instantly, I let my mind wander to the kiss on the terrace, the way Hermione had felt in my arms. I took a deep breath, picturing her face as the wind swirled around her and tossed her hair, and the voice gave a shriek and shrank back into the shadows. I opened my eyes again and turned to see Ron leaning against a tree, the tears now pouring down his cheeks.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” he said to me. “Sorry that I ever did it. I thought that if I did, you would just…just let me have her back. Hermione, I mean. I thought that by joining them and helping the disease spread, I could just make both of you sick and then find the cure. And then I would be able to take the credit for saving her and she would see that she loved me still. But then, I got in too deep. And they told me that they were set to kill and I was going to help them do it. And then he said that he would make sure that you were too weak to fetch the cure and that you…you would be the only one with the ability to do it. And when I asked him about Hermione, he said that she would probably die. And I couldn’t show emotion, but I asked if he would spare my family. And he promised that he would but…but…”

I felt a cold wave sweep over my body as he spoke. I barely felt myself move as I wandered over to where he stood. I seized his left arm viciously and he let out a sob as I heaved the hem of his robes up. The Dark Mark burned there on his skin, as black as I had ever seen it. And I recoiled and backed away, my face contorted in disgust and disbelief. Part of me had known, but I hadn’t wanted to admit it. Part of me had guessed, but I hadn’t wanted to be correct. And here I stood now, in the presence of a Death Eater and at his mercy.

“You have to understand Harry that I was angry,” Ron began. “I didn’t know where else to turn and I…I’m w-weak! I’m not like you; I’m not as resilient! You-Know-Who he…he made me promises that I couldn’t refuse!”

“Lies, Ron!” I spat at him, and the fury was beginning to spark the white world again. “It’s always lies with him! Everything he told you, he told you because he knew you wanted to hear it! He needed you to get to me! And he used you…but he knew that once that disease spread, it was going to go to anyone, including your sister! Did you think that you were protecting her?! You should have known!! You’ve been around his schemes for years! You should have known that he would…”

“I HATED YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME!” Ron screamed. “I WANTED TO GET BACK AT YOU FOR TAKING HER FROM ME! AND YOU…YOU…”

He broke like a string dangling a bowling ball. He threw himself down at my feet and began convulsing in sobs. I simply stood, staring at him, my own fury mixed with that of another’s. And when I spoke, it was not my own words coming out of my mouth, but a message from someone else, a message from master to servant.

“You’ve sealed your own coffin, Ronald Weasley,” my own voice said, and I felt myself twitch as the message took me over. “You have betrayed me, and so you will die.”

Ron stopped his sobbing as the voice entered into his ears. He brought his face out from behind his hands and looked up at me. But I was not me anymore, not right then. I was something else, something horrible and blind that could not see because of the good residing in the body, but who could hear and speak just fine. And I could feel the…the Weasley boy staring me defiantly in the face, though I did not see his eyes.

“You bastard!” he shrieked, and I cackled a cackle that did not belong to me. “You killed her! And you mark my words, I’m going to see that he makes it through this! I’m going to save him, I’m going to bring him to you, and he’s going to kill you! And when he does, I will be standing there, laughing as you fall!”

I laughed again, and then felt him touch me. My eyes rolled, my knees fell out from beneath me and I was in hysterics now, my sides aching fit to burst as I howled in laughter.

“Harry!” Ron called, but I was no longer Harry. At least, part of me wasn’t. But there was something inside my head, talking faintly. I couldn’t make out the words at first, and I coughed and shook in a convulsion of sorts. But then its voice grew stronger, and as a hand collided with my face, I heard the voice scream out.

“Hold on, mate,” it said consolingly, and it was my voice, the one that belonged to me. “Hold onto yourself.”

“Harry!” Ron shouted again, and my eyes snapped open. I was back, back and in control of my own mind again. I pushed Ron off of me and rolled over onto my side to retch. I heaved in gasps of air, the blood still burning my lips as I rolled back over onto my back and shook. Ron looked down at me, the grief still scorching his eyes.

“You all right?” he asked me as he offered me his hand. I took it, using it to steady myself. I stumbled to a tree and leaned against it, mustering my will power.

“What the Hell was that?” I asked him. He shrugged.

“He said that he was going to try and…and play around with you,” he said. “See if he could get inside your head a bit.”

“You call that “a bit”?”

“We’ve gotta get to that cure, Harry, and fast.”

“Who said you were coming. You’re a Death Eater, remember? Signed a little contract saying that you would always be loyal to Volde…”

“Shh!”

“What? Still afraid of saying your bloody master’s name?”

Ron’s cheeks burned red with color. He said nothing, merely choosing to stare out into space for a moment. I took the time to push myself away from the tree and collect my wand from the ground. I was going to walk away, leave him there by himself while I continued on. Then, I heard him call out behind me just as I was beginning to lose him in the darkness.

“She’s dying,” he called after me. I froze in my tracks. I knew he was talking about Hermione, and I knew that he was right. I was even surprised that she hadn’t died already, though the thought of her cold and lifeless was enough to send me to Hell and back again. She had been the first to fall ill, and yet two had died before her. At least two, that is. I didn’t know the exact number. Ron called out again. “She’s dying and she can’t hold on much longer. I saw her before I left and she talked to me. And do you know what she said?”

“What?” I asked him. “What did she say? What could she have said to you that you think I would care about?”

“She said that she missed you,” he said, “that she wanted to see you again. And then she said that she missed us, all three of us. The way we used to be, before we knew about all of this…this mess. She wanted it to be that way again, she said. And I promised her that it would be, one day. I promised her that.”

“What does it matter, your promises?” I asked. “You promised Voldemort you would be his man, forever.”

“Only to protect the people I love.”

“AND IT LANDED YOU WITH A DEAD SISTER!”

Ron looked down at the ground, wounded by my words. I was breathing heavily, my breath showing in the cold night air. He looked at me again.

“You’re the only one who can save her, Harry,” Ron said. “Hermione, I mean. And I know how much you love her. You don’t want her to die, any more than I wanted Ginny to. So I’m going to keep my promise to her. I’m going to try my best to make things the way they were. But if you go this alone, you will be dead before you even get a chance to reach that cure. He’ll kill you, and then he’ll let the rest of them die the way he’s set it up for them to. So you let me come with you. I’ll snap you out of the episodes that you experience. I’ll keep you under a watchful eye. I’ll let you get the sleep you need and make sure you’ve got the…the strength to get you where you need to go.”

“Thanks but no thanks,” I uttered, and I turned my back on him. I covered my mouth to cough, blood rising again. Ron had said that I wouldn’t be infected like the rest of them. Yet here I was, coughing up my lungs just like all of them were. I was weakening, and I knew it better than anyone. Without help, there was a chance I might not even make it to Voldemort. I knew that he wouldn’t let me die on my own, not without killing me. But if he found me already half-dead, he would shoot the spell at me and then it would be done. And Hermione would die too, her chance for a normal life snuffed out like a candle. She would never grow to have children, never open another book again. Those beautiful chocolate eyes of hers would fill up with death, and it would be my fault, my burden to bear even if I were dead. I stopped walking and closed my eyes, meeting the whiteness again. Opening them quickly so as to prevent it from consuming me, I pivoted slowly and turned around again.

“I could kill you,” I said to him. Again, he lifted his shoulders in a shrug.

“Can’t say I don’t deserve it,” he said. “But I won’t let it happen. I know exactly what he’s doing to you, Harry, and almost everything that he intends to do. I’ll try my hardest to snap you out of it. And you’re not exactly a weakling. You’ll be able to do just fine, with my help. Alone, you’d never manage. But with me…”

“The odds are still against me.”

“But slightly higher in your favor.”

I sighed and it hurt. My chest felt as though it were being butchered from inside, put through a meat grinder and shredded. I wheezed, looked away for a moment, and then looked back.

“Can I trust you?” I asked him, even though a flame of hope was burning somewhere in my heart. The friendship would never be as it had been before, not after such a betrayal. But if Ron was on my side again, then he was right. The game had changed a bit, and though I was still the underdog, my chances were a bit better. “Do I have your loyalty?”

“Always,” he said, and he seized my hand and shook it. “Now, what do you say we make camp? You look like you’re fixing to die or something.”

“That’s funny,” I said. “You almost made me laugh.”

I wanted to pitch the tent, but Ron insisted on doing it. I didn’t know if it was because of guilt or pity that he offered, but I didn’t argue with him that much. My head was throbbing, and I wasn’t sure if I would have had the energy to erect one. It took him merely twenty seconds to get it all set up, and then he went about casting Shield Charms and other protective spells.

”It’s what Hermione would do!” he said cheerfully, though the sadness still overpowered anything in his voice. I nodded as I sat against a tree, fighting the urge to fall asleep. I knew that if I gave in, I might not wake up as the same person. I had to suffer in order to keep my wits about myself, so I slapped myself gently across the face and shook my head, keeping my eyes open.

”Let me just go inside really quickly and I’ll make sure everything’s set,” he said, and he disappeared underneath the flap like an anxious housewife. I leaned my head back against the tree’s trunk, sighing. I felt something tap me on the shoulder. Thinking it was a bug, I attempted to shoo it away. But it tapped me again, and I looked over. My heart swelled as my eyes befell upon the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. There, standing by my side and looking as healthy as the first day I had met her, was Hermione. She smiled at me, extended her hand, and brushed my cheek. Her scent was strong, stronger than it had ever been. I leaned forward, desperate to touch her lips against mine and feel her body beneath my fingers. She put a hand on my shoulders to stop me.

“You’re too tired for this right now,” she said to me. I shook my head and pushed a strand of hair back from her face.

“No, I’m fine,” I assured her, though my eyelids were heavy. All I wanted was her and nothing more. I wanted to hold her, to kiss her, to be with her. But she resisted me as I made to move forward again. “Really, I’m okay. I just want to be with you.”

“Sleep, Harry,” she told me. “I’ll be waiting for you when I wake up. But right now, you just need to close your eyes. Close your eyes and I’ll see you in your dreams. I’ll see you there, and then I promise, I’ll let you kiss me. I’ll let myself be with you.”

I suddenly felt the weight of exhaustion bearing down on me like an anvil. Lights danced in front of me like ballerinas as I felt her soft lips graze mine and I was falling through white clouds, through white air. There was beautiful laughter ringing softly in my ears, and I could have listened to it forever. And she was standing there, in the midst of the snowfield, her white robes glorious and flowing down her body with grace. I started to run to her, but my body wouldn’t let me go anywhere. I reached out, wanting her hand to touch mine, but I couldn’t reach her.

“You haven’t done it yet, Harry,” a voice called out, and I fell to my knees as a pain seared in my scar. I cried out, reached out to Hermione and begged her to help me. But she wasn’t Hermione anymore. She was a little girl now, with glowing red eyes. And she was talking to me, her voice icy. “Kill him, Harry. He betrayed you. Kill him. Kill him now.”

“Wake up, mate!” Ron’s voice sounded as though it was coming from the surface of a black pond. “Come on Harry, time to come back. None of it’s real. Come back.”

I made a grab for something, my hand quivering, and then I felt my face break through to free air again. I heaved in gasps of breath, weakened but alive, and Ron was in front of me, his hands steadying him on the ground.

“Some grip you got there,” he told me. “Took me forever to get you to let go.”

He was rubbing his throat, and I could see, though my eyesight was foggy, that it was red and irritated. Looking at my own hands, I realized that they were cupped into a position mirroring his neck. I moved my fingers out of the position and sat shaking, not looking at anything, allowing my vision to blur. She had been there, so real, so concrete. And now I was alone again, and she was an illusion. And I had tried to kill someone again. What was I turning into? Some kind of monster infected with a disease that made me do my enemy’s bidding? Had I become my own worst nightmare after all?

“I can’t do this, Ron,” I said. “I…you can’t be with me. I’m dangerous.”

Ron said nothing for a moment, merely popping his lips. Then, he looked up at the stars.

“You know when Ginny was first born, I didn’t like her at all,” he said, a dry chuckle rising out of his mouth. I cocked an eyebrow. “I didn’t want her taking my place as the youngest, and I thought because she was a girl she would be…I don’t know, loved more or something like that. But as the years went by, I realized that she was everything a brother could have ever wanted. She was more than just a playmate…she was like a best friend too. And now, she’s gone. I can’t have her back. And it’s my fault.”

“So what are you saying?”

“That I’m going to put things right, Harry. I’m staying with you, no matter how bad things get. Because I owe it, to her and to you. I loved her and I killed her. And I’m going to rectify that mistake. I’m going to stay with you, snap you out of whatever you need snapped out of, and then we’ll see what we get out of that. I’m not going to let another best friend die…not you or Hermione. It’s too late for Ginny, but I promise you that I won’t leave you…not until you’ve done what you need to do. And if I have to die getting you there, I’ll do it.”

I coughed, but the blood did not come up. Using the tree as a support, I pushed myself off of the ground and made toward the tent. Ron was already standing, and he watched me go in. I turned to look at him.

“Was Hermione…how bad was she?” I asked earnestly. My fear had been heightened by the vision. Was it just Voldemort’s images torturing me? Or had it been Hermione’s soul, visiting me from the dead?

“She’s strong, Harry,” he assured me. “She’ll make it through this. She’s waiting for you, mate. And she’ll keep waiting.”

“Why wait when you can have her now?” asked a cold voice from behind a tree. I shook my head, staring as the Shield Charms began to break around us. And a figure began to emerge out of the darkness, carrying something in his arms. And as he approached, the cloaked man threw something down at my feet. I backed away instinctively, and then rushed forward. Hermione’s eyes were closed, and blood was matted in her unkempt hair.

“Thought I’d bring you a gift,” Draco Malfoy sneered as he pointed his wand at my face.