It's Not Meant to Be by hpluver365

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Chapter Notes: I have a lot of people I would like to thank for inspiring me, pushing me, and correcting me. First off, thank you to one of my best friends who prefers to stay unnamed for keeping me occupied during History class by absentmindedly saying, “My soul is a trapped butterfly.” That one line gave birth to this entire poem.

I would also like to thank my friend Jana for pushing me to continue with this piece when three periods later in Math class, I had given up. A poem she had written for English continued to inspire me in the writing of this poem.

Can’t forget my wonder beta, Kate (Euphrates). I thank thee profusely for helping me with the finer points of this poem. It wouldn’t be what it was without you! Thanks for your harsh critique and your careful editing. I don’t know what I’d do without you!

Read and enjoy! And if you have the time, I’d love a review!

Why was I chosen?

Why was it me?

Why must I kill him?

It’s not meant to be.

What makes you think this?

What makes it seem

That I am the “Chosen One?”

I really don’t see.

The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches.

Born to those who have thrice defied him,

Born as the seventh month dies,

And the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal,

But he will have the power the Dark Lord knows not,

And either must die at the hand of the other -

For neither can live while the other survives.

The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord

Will be born as the seventh month dies.*

Is this why? This prophecy?

It’s not true -

Why can’t you see?

Just look at what it’s doing to me.

~ ~ ~

My soul is a trapped butterfly,

A knot that won’t untie.

The whole world weighs down on me,

But why? I cannot see.

So much is expected -

So much I cannot do.

Will I be rejected

If I do not fill these shoes?

Or did this already happen?

My rejection? My last goodbye?

Am I already forgotten?

Am I gone? Did I die?

~ ~ ~

You may say I’m meant to kill him,

But killing's not for me.

I’ve detained him, I’ve confronted him,

But kill?

It’s not meant to be.

Blackness. Stillness. Badness. Sadness.

Death.

Killing. Dying. Mourning. Crying.

Death.

Look at those words -

Their sorrow and truth.

Look at those feelings -

How powerful and uncouth.

It pains me to say it,

But that’s not me now.

It will never be.

So find somebody else

Who won’t disagree.

The only way to remember is to forget.

The only way to love is to hate.

The only way to heal is to hurt.

The only way to survive is to die.

There is no other way.

Not for you or for me.

The only way to survive is to die.

Now that’s my prophecy.

Author's Note: You should also know that I do not think Harry feels this strongly against his task. He is too strong a character to explode and have an emotional crisis like this. I do however think that Harry is slightly reluctant and unhappy with his life, however, this poem is more an exaggeration of his feelings than anything else.

Oh, I forgot one thing. No, I do not want Harry to die. I had a feeling some of you reviewers would ask me that! It’s just that in his extreme angst, he sees this as the only way out.

*This entire italicized section was taken right from the book Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by JK Rowling.