It became obvious to anyone who cared to look that Severus Snape and Lily Evans shared a secret. They, on the other hand, believed that their friendship was relatively undisclosed. They considered that most people knew they were on speaking terms, but that their midnight rendezvous of potion making went unannounced. However, even the very beginning of love is like a billboard tattooed on one’s forehead, and Lily Evans was unfortunate enough to have a marquee.
She was careful. She daydreamed only when away from Severus’ presence and even then only when she was alone. But her mind did wander, often at inopportune moments, and her subconscious seemed desperate to proclaim what her lips could not. It was small, but prevalent: his name scrawled quickly on an old parchment just to see what it looked like, a note from him that never seemed to reach the bin, a deep sigh escaping from her chest. She wasn’t even sure how she felt, what she was feeling.
Of course Severus cannot be excluded from this, because though he had superb control over his outward display of emotion, he truly and desperately loved Lily. He readily admitted it to himself, dwelled on it, saturated his mind with every sentence she had ever whispered to him. Severus’ conduct revealed nothing. He was safe to dream about Lily when she sat in front of him in class. There was no chance of a blush, a falter, a hesitation. Unfortunately, when alone with Lily, Severus was unhappily an open book.
The Marauders hated everything about Severus. James, at the very least, was beginning to form the connection between Severus and Lily and a cruel and malicious jealousy grew in him. The Mauraders knew about James’ feud, and they knew about Severus and Lily’s friendship, and because the place where Lily’s affections lay was important to James, they were willing to act. There was more than one wolf in their group.
“Disgusting,” spat James as he watched Lily laugh at something Severus had said.
“I know, Prongs. Gilbert’s a tyrant. There is no way to do his essay and Flitwick’s tonight,” sighed Remus, stretching back on his chair.
“I was talking about Snivellus,” said James, nodding his head to a now more stoic Severus and Lily on the other side of the library.
Sirius quit gnawing the end of his quill and ran his hand through his hair.
“I could curse him. Hell, Wormtail could curse him, James. Go for it Pettigrew,” Sirius laughed prodding Peter.
“Nah, the greaseball and I fought yesterday,” responded James. “That nasty piece of work hit me from behind. He hides it well doesn’t he? There’s no way he managed to get all the burns I gave him healed. I hope they’re there for a week.”
“Why don’t we have a chat with him,” proposed Sirius, rising from his chair then looking down at Remus. “Don’t worry, Mum. I don’t want to fight him.”
Remus chose to leave the library in lieu of confronting his friends just as Lily rose to leave as well. She gathered up her books and her ink and as she tucked her hair behind her ear she just managed to glimpse the approaching trio from the corner of her eye. Severus hadn’t seen them yet. Leaning closer to his head she said hurriedly, “Do. Not. Fight.”
Severus looked to her sharply and then snapped his head towards the Marauders. Lily threw James a warning frown then strode out of the library. Once outside the door she leaned against the wall where they couldn’t see her and found Remus there as well. They shared a brief knowing glance then listened.
“Snape.”
“What, Potter? Can’t confront me without a backup team?” Severus didn’t look up, but his wand was in his hand.
Leaning closer, James provoked him. “Funny, slime like you talking about bravery when you only attack when my back is turned.”
“I’d face you any day, one on one, Potter,” sneered Severus through gritted teeth, rising to meet James at eye level.
“A duel,” suggested Peter hungrily.
“Make it proper. I’m James’ second. Midnight by Barnabas the Barmy. I won’t get in the way. No one will,” promised Sirius backing up James.
“No seconds. If you’re man enough to face me, Potter, come alone.”
“Midnight, pig,” said James his voice rising as he moved to Severus’ face.
“Midnight,” consented Severus, and he walked across the room and out of the library.
Lily had heard him coming and had run across the hall and dropped her books. She pretended to be picking them up as Severus came past.
“Sev, what’s wrong?” she asked innocently.
“Lily, I need you to work on the potion alone tonight. The Gurdyroot has to be added exactly at 11:45. And then two cups of sugar. It’s not in the recipe, but I think it will make a person talk more easily,” said Severus hurriedly as he helped hand her the books.
“Why?” she asked.
“Something about the medicine going down easier. It’ll work.”
“No, Sev,” she stopped in front of him, grabbing his arm, “why do I need to handle the potion? Where are you going tonight?”
Shaking her hand off him, Severus’ eyes turned cold. Lily backed away but met his gaze.
“Nowhere, Lily. I’m just tired.”
“So what was that with James?”
“The usual insults,” Severus said in an offhand way as he moved around her.
Lily watched him go, and then noticed Remus against a wall.
“Remus you have to help me. We’re prefects, we can’t let them kill each other.”
Shifting uncomfortably, Remus averted her gaze.
“It’ll happen anyway. But I’m going to be there. If Sna- if either of them crosses the line, I’ll stop them.”
“Then I’m coming too,” declared Lily decidedly. But as she headed with Remus to the Griffindor Common Room she felt fear crawling in her heart.
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Severus paced the floor in front of Barnabas the Barmy. His eyes were hollow, mad. His hair, damp from sweat, clung to his face like sticky spiderwebs. Lily had cast a Disillusionment Charm on herself and from the end of the hallway she watched him fearfully. It was like he was a caged animal, a dangerous foreign beast. He looked to her as a black-feathered Hippogriff, talons sharpened and poised over an enemy.
It wasn’t for nothing that Lily was considered the best student at Hogwarts at Charms. The Disillusionment Charm was perfect and the potion ingredients were set to pour and stir themselves at precisely the right time. Lily was stricken by the change that had come over Severus. She did not recognize her friend. She didn’t know where Remus was but she hoped he would avoid Severus right now. She felt a stab of pity for James.
The man himself suddenly appeared a few feet away from Severus having thrown off his invisibility cloak. Even in the dim moonlight Lily could see the cocky smirk.
“Don’t scream, Potter,” hissed Severus. “I don’t want interruptions.”
“I’m tired of talking,” James barely breathed as he flicked his wand.
Severus just had time to block the spell that glowed orange-red. As one blinks, Severus had sent back a spell automatically. It grazed James’ thigh and Lily, horrified, could make out a trickle of blood collecting on the stone floor.
James, however; did not seem to have noticed. His response threw Severus a few feet before crippling him on the ground. Severus pushed himself up and moved his wand in a thrust. James leaped, but his feet managed to get caught and tied by invisible ropes.
For an insane instant Lily wanted to shout the counter spell so James could defend himself. But James appeared to have been able to do it and he sent a wild Expelliarmus! just as Severus did. James’ bounced off the wall then hit Severus and both lost their wands. In complete fury, they lost their senses as well. James flew at Severus with an almighty uppercut. Severus beat him right back.
The fight was terrible. James had a cut above his eye and could not see through the blood. Severus threw him against the wall and James’s head hit with a crack. Undaunted, James replied by punching Severus so rapidly and repeatedly in the head that Severus could barely block him.
All the while they were deadly silent. Only thuds and cracks and gasps could be heard. Severus managed to knock the wind out of James, and as James tried to catch his breath, Severus did as well. But Severus was not quick enough. James tackled him to the ground and wrapped his hands around Severus’ thin neck. Lily had only to watch him once slam Severus’ head onto the stone before she moved like lightning.
She pulled James’ hair sharply and heaved him by the back of his shirt. She had just managed to get in one kick to his shin when James responded to the attack from an invisible aggressor.
Still on the ground, he saw a wand near him. Grabbing it, he pointed behind him and Lily was sent flying. She hit the wall, hard. As she slid down and accepted the blackness filling her mind, she could just see Severus rising.
When she lost consciousness, Lilly’s body became visible again. At first James could not understand what he was seeing. Then, through his one good eye, he learned the terrible truth.
“LILLY!” he shouted grabbing her shoulders. “No! Lily, please. God, what’s the spell- Lily wake up!”
James did not even hear Severus’ roar. The Slytherin, seeing his love helplessly attacked and now seemingly lifeless, grabbed the Gryffindor by his neck and squeezed. James had nothing left to fight him with. He was at last at the mercy of a merciless Snape.
But Remus had seen all that had taken place in those brief moments and now he acted. Sending a spell, he knocked out Severus and then all three lay on the floor, still. Seeing the glow of a wand moving towards them down the hallway, Remus shouted,
“Please! Watch these students! I’m getting the nurse!”
He then sprinted off and returned shortly with the nurse to a now lit hallway filled with teachers.
“My God, what did they do to each other?” asked a stunned Professor Flitwick.
“Not now. Let me get them to the Hospital Wing,” said Madame Pomfrey lifting the students onto invisible stretchers.
Professors Gilbert and Dumbledore followed with Remus. As they made their way, Dumbledore spoke calmly to Remus.
“Mr. Lupin, tell me what was going on here.”
“Dumbledore, it was obviously a love quarrel and the subject of it managed to get herself in the middle,” exclaimed Professor Gilbert.
“No-yes- it was really just James and Snape. Sir, we, I mean, Lily and I, knew they were going to fight and we came to stop things from getting out of hand,” panted Remus, trying to keep up.
“Without informing a teacher? Two prefects?” questioned Dumbledore quietly.
“Sir, I’m so sorry. We had- I had no idea this could happen.”
“I’m not meaning to criticize you Remus. I understand that both you and Miss Evans are friends with the two. I’m merely wondering about the position you were in as leaders of your house and loyal friends. Teachers, it seems, would have eliminated your dilemma.”
Hanging his head, Remus continued…
“Lily said she would be there but I didn’t see her. It wasn’t quite the time when Snape and James said they would fight so I ran back to Gryffindor tower to get her. When I couldn’t find her I ran back to Barnabas the Barmy and…I couldn’t understand what I was seeing. They were fighting like Muggles and coated in blood. Then suddenly James was pulled backwards and then Lily appeared, knocked out.”
Gilbert looked sharply at Dumbledore.
“Disillusionment Charm. She must have put it on herself. No wonder the Potter boy hit her. An invisible assailant. “
“Mr. Lupin, that is enough from you tonight. I will talk to you further tomorrow, but for now, your friends are safe and in good hands. There will be an announcement in the morning regarding duels and curfews.”
Remus could not look into the steely blue eyes but instead stared at the three floating students drifting softly into the Hospital Wing.
The Only One He Ever Loved by Salem
Chapter Notes: Looooonger chapter compared to the others. Tell me what you think.