She looked so lost and alone, standing there with her eyes turned away from me. I didn’t know what to do. She seemed convinced that I would view her as a monster because of her sister.
Silence fell between us, neither comfortable nor uncomfortable. Several times, I thought to do something, say something, but I didn’t know what. Finally, she tried to leave, an action I refused to allow. I didn’t want her wandering off when she was so vulnerable.
“No,” I said firmly, stopping her attempt to walk past me with an arm.
She spun away from my touch, recoiling in anger as if I had planned on taking advantage of her. Her usually warm eyes were fiery in her rage as she stood away from me, hands clenched into fists at her side.
“Dromeda, what are you doing?” I asked in shock.
Her breathing was ragged, her body tense as she stared at me unseeingly. I approached her slowly, wondering about her reaction and the things she was seeing. Cautiously, I reached out to touch her shoulder, surprised when my fingers brushed against her cheek instead. I drew back from her, the softness of her skin still lingering on my fingertips. What was I doing?
I looked down at my hand, thinking maybe I had the Muggle disease where I lost control of my limbs. That would surely explain my roaming fingers more than a simple case of curiosity and attraction.
My eyes went back to Andromeda, somewhat relieved to see her looking at me with a puzzled expression gracing her features. At least she wasn’t mad.
“I, um, I don’t think you should go. Come with me; we can talk somewhere quiet.”
“I can’t, Ted. I need to be alone. As much as I love it, I don’t think we-”
Cutting her off, I shook my head. “Don’t say it. Your sister has nothing to do with us, with our friendship -- with me.”
She glared at me, anger flaring up in her eyes. “Yes, she does! Don’t you see? She’s the embodiment of the Dark Lord’s beliefs -- my family’s beliefs. Those beliefs all scream out against people like you,” she cried out. At my confusion, she gave a small shriek of frustration. “Muggle-Borns! Half-bloods! People who don’t come from ancient families of pure blood!”
“She can’t touch me in here, Dromeda. I’m safe with Dumbledore as Headmaster. I’m not afraid of your sister,” I said calmly.
Her eyes were disbelieving as she stared at me. “Did you know that every Death Eater has a relative within this school? The majority of those relatives would not mind passing on something from their Dark Lord to their relative. The majority of those relatives share the same beliefs and ambitions as their Death Eaters. My sister knows magic now that you will probably never know. Dark magic. She’s powerful and strong, clever to a fault, and hardly sentimental. Growing up, I used to think that God forgot to give her a heart. You’d stand no chance against her. You’d be ruined in a second.”
I watched her pace before me, waving her arms occasionally to punctuate her words. She was agitated and rambling, the fear showing through in her eyes.
“Dromeda, stop. Stop. I’ll be okay. Why would your sister target me specifically?”
Andromeda stopped to stare at me, her trembling evident now that she was standing still. “Why? Because you’re a “Mudblood”, impure and unfit to be on speaking terms with me. Do you not remember what she said all those years ago?”
I stared at her, wide-eyed. “No, I remember. She threatened to hurt you, to make you pay and ache because I wanted to be your friend. She told me not to be selfish and make you suffer.”
“See, that’s exactly the sort of person Bella is! She wouldn’t hesitate to hurt me, her own sister, if it meant getting her way. She’s always liked me least…”
The last sentence was mumbled, as if to herself. I watched, unsure of what to say.
“Dromeda-”
“Why do you call me that? Why not Andy, or something else?” she interrupted suddenly, her eyes burning with something unidentifiable.
I could feel my face scrunch up in confusion. “I don’t call you Andy because I’ve noticed that your family and other pure-blood fanatics call you that. I want something all my own to call you.” As the last words left my lips, they tingled with the meaning behind them. Shaken, I continued, “I call you Dromeda because you don’t seem like a Drea or a Droma. Do you not like it?”
She smiled at me sweetly. “No, it’s charming, and kind. Like you.”
I felt heat flush through me, reminding me how glad I was that I didn’t blush easily. “Let’s go somewhere we can talk without interruption.”
Her smile faded, her face collapsing back into sorrow and fear. Worry blossomed as I watched her try valiantly to keep her emotions in check. The shock of her sister’s latest news seemed to have broken the weave of her control. I offered my hand to her wordlessly, pleased when she slipped her cool hand in mine.
----------------------------------------------
“I don’t feel like myself anymore,” she muttered before turning surprised eyes on me. “I’ve never told that to anyone before.”
I smiled at her reassuringly. “I’m not just anyone, ma cheri.”
She smiled, though the fear and worry was still there in her eyes. “You speak French?”
Nodding, I shifted my position against the window frame. I could feel the heat from her leg as they leaned on mine. She was staring down at her hands, her face hidden by her long hair.
“On me l'a enseigné pendant qu'en France avec ma famille.” At her confused look, I grinned and translated. “I was taught it in France with my family. I loved the language so I kept speaking it when my family forgot. Aveline enjoys having conversations in French.”
“Oh. Your family must be well off.”
“We’re not too bad. Dad owns a travel agency “ Muggle place that sets up travel arrangements for people “ and Mum helps with the creative part of it.”
“So they like to travel?”
“Yeah, I guess you could say that. They’re in America right now.”
“Why didn’t you go with them?” She sounded curious as she finally met my eyes.
I looked away, out the window we were sitting in. There were plenty of reasons why I hadn’t gone with them.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
I shook my head at her quiet words. “I do want to tell you. It’s just a touchy subject between my family and me. They don’t understand or accept my life. It’s too awkward being with them.”
Her gaze rose up to meet mine, a twitching in my stomach appearing at the fire in her eyes. She leaned forward, resting her elbow on her thigh. “I feel very similar to that,” she said, anger putting an edge to her voice.
“I don’t understand this,” “ she gestured between us with her hands “ “but I feel this illogical urge to tell you everything. It’s rather scary because I was taught that to trust someone is to give him power over you. With the people I grew up around, this was true. With you, I would rather marry the Giant Squid than say you can’t be trusted.”
I, unsure of what to say, only reached out for one of the hands lying still in her lap. She gave me a wavering smile as I played with her fingers absently, seeming to understand that I knew what she was saying.
“My family never seemed to know the real me. I was only ever what they wanted me to be. Coming to Hogwarts opened my eyes to what there could be, who I could be. It showed me that there was so much more than what I had grown up with…
“It was a world of secrets and pureblood, of deceptions and lies, of treachery and unhappiness. Not exactly the right kind of situation to raise children in. Bella was exposed the worst. She set the precedent for being the perfect daughter: follow Mum and Dad’s rules, get sorted into Slytherin, excel in school, believe the beliefs of the family, and marry a pureblood. She was the favored girl, despite her mood swings and slight insanity. I was supposed to follow in her footsteps. To me, everything she did was something I never wanted to become. Yet, I was, and still am, being pressured to be like her.”
“You’re not. I knew that when I first met you,” I interjected, watching her bowed head. My words were met with a dazzling smile of such warmth, I was taken aback.
“So many have told me that I remind them of my sister, at least in looks. It tears me up inside sometimes. I don’t want to upset my family though. They’re all I have, all I’ve ever had. Loyalty to family has been preached to me so many times, especially by my Aunt Walburga. I think she is suspicious about me.” Her tone turned slightly amused at the end.
Deciding to take a risk, I gave her hand a squeeze and spoke. “Oh, who wouldn’t be? What with those big, lovely hazel eyes, and your fantastic smile, who would ever trust you?” I winked at her, earning an appreciative giggle and smile.
“Oh yes, who would?” She grinned, but it slipped away into seriousness. “It means more than I think I can say that you seem to see me.”
“Of course I see you. I’ve got eyes, haven’t I?” I scoffed, giving her thigh a nudge with my foot.
“What do you see exactly, Ted?”
There was a burning curiosity in her eyes, bright but unable to mask the fear behind it. I wonder what there was to fear from me. “I see a beautiful girl who is smart.”
“Thank you.”
“I see an amazing girl who’s opinionated, but scared.” She smiled faintly at my slightly dry tone. “I see a lovely girl who is sad and a bit lonely. I see the kind of girl I could be friends with.”
Her eyes looked at me appraisingly. She didn’t seem to know what to say. I felt a sensation flow through me as I realized just how close we were on the window seat, the feel of her long fingered hand in mine, the things I had said, the look in her eyes. It was just as intimate as I had ever been with Aveline, a thing I had shared with no one else.
She gave my hand a squeeze, managing to convey the words she seemed unable to speak. A silence fell between us, a thoughtful silence as we fell into our minds.
“What about siblings? Do you have any?” She broke the silence finally, her voice hesitant at so different a subject.
“Two. An older brother who envies my life and despises me because of it, as well as a younger sister who adores both of us and is the apple of our parents’ eyes.”
“To think that my family considers Muggles almost incapable of feelings,” she remarked musingly.
“Ted!”
We both turned to look into the Hufflepuff common room’s depths, towards the voice yelling my name. Running towards us, I spotted Margaret, a younger girl I had befriended. She was bundled up, pulling on gloves as she came closer.
“Hello Margaret.” I was rather miffed at her interruption. It wasn’t every day I sat in the window seat with someone from another house.
“Do you want to join us for a snowball fight? Or sledding?” She turned her green gaze on Andromeda. “You should come too. I’m Margaret, by the way.”
Her enthusiastic friendliness seemed to surprise Andromeda for a short minute before she regained her composure. She smiled brightly at the younger girl.
“Margaret, this is Andromeda.” I made the introduction with a dry tone. Margaret had always been a friendly girl.
“It’s nice to meet you. So, what do you say?” she questioned, her face hopeful.
I glanced at Andromeda; she was gazing at Margaret thoughtfully. It seemed that she was actually considering the proposal.
“How many people are coming?” Andromeda spoke to Margaret for the first time, a feat which made Margaret grin widely.
“Oh well, we’ve got Jasmine and Aeron, Evelyn, Einar, Ceridwen and Reid, Chris, Luke, plus some others. I guess you’d say we’ve got enough.”
“Hmmm… Well, I’d have to go get some things to wear…,” Dromeda was welcoming the distraction thankfully, her hand giving me a swift squeeze in what I sensed was excitement. I wondered if the Slytherins held contests such as snowball fights like we did.
“Nonsense! Come with me, and we should be able to find you some things to wear from someone. You might not match though.” Margaret gushed, her happiness at Andromeda’s acceptance visible as she brushed away the older girl’s words.
Dromeda looked at me, her eyes bright in anticipation. “Do you want to?”
Who was I to pass up fun in the snow? “Sure. Go on ahead. I’ll just change into warmer clothes.”
She flashed me a cheerful smile before slipping off the window seat. The pair of girls disappeared down the corridor, Margaret keeping up a steady stream of conversation.
I left to change as well, thinking upon all that I had learned about Andromeda in the course of the day. There was so much more to her than I had thought. Thinking about my first impression of her earlier in the year made me blush at the conclusions I had jumped to.
I was waiting for them in the common room when they came back. Margaret had been right; Andromeda didn’t match. She wore a shockingly pink hat that made her cheeks rosy. A gold and black scarf wrapped around her neck and was tucked into the thick black sweater she wore. Over that sweater, she wore a jacket the color of Muggle army wear. Margaret was arguing with her about her shoes as they approached; she wore a pair of red boots that had fur sticking out of the top from the insides.
“You’ll be a lot warmer in them! I promise you that.”
“I like my shoes a lot better.”
“Trust me; you’ll be happy I made you wear these when we come back in. Otherwise, your feet would be frozen, and your shoes soaked.”
Rolling her eyes, Andromeda grinned at me as she gave up. She pulled on a pair of blue striped gloves that Margaret handed her.
“All right, let’s go,” said Margaret. She dashed ahead to meet up with the other members of our party, leaving us in relative privacy.
“You look ready to laugh,” Dromeda remarked as she adjusted the hat over her long hair.
I let the smile tugging on my lips slip forth. “You simply remind me a very confused rainbow.”
“Oh, come off it. I look perfectly fine. At least I’ll be warm.” She grinned at me, unable to pretend to be mad.
A Little Lighter Than Black by kritchen
Chapter Notes: Thanks to Nik as always for beta-ing. She's fantastic and fast! Thanks to Kat for helping me with ideas when I got stuck as well. :}