It had been sixteen hours, and Dora had still not contacted her.
Andromeda had tried to keep herself busy, she really had. It kept her from thinking of the awful possibilities that the night had in store for them all. She had cleaned the kitchen, read a magazine, rearranged the furniture in the parlor, cooed at her grandson, and even laid down to sleep, but her attempts had been half-hearted and it was never long before she turned to another activity. The restless energy had been building since Remus had run out the door, and the only thing that had kept her from running to Hogwarts herself was the infant now clutched in her arms.
Surely a battle couldn’t take this long?
She remembered, from ages ago, a conversation she had shared with Ted’s mother. Margaret had grown up during the Muggles’ World War II, and her father had been killed in the fighting.
“It was awful,” she remarked once, her voice full of sadness. “We didn’t hear from him for months. And then, one day after I arrived home from school”I was seventeen then”we saw two men in uniform walking towards our house. My mum fainted then and there, because she knew they had come to tell us why there were no more letters.”
The only men in uniform for this war were those who wore Death Eater robes. Andromeda supposed it was ironic that she and Margaret shared the same fear, but for very different reasons.
Where was Dora?
She wandered around the house, too close to panic to appreciate the way the late-afternoon sun lit her parlor elegantly. It had been months since the sun had shone properly. If it had been a normal day, she and Remus and Dora would have taken Teddy outside to enjoy the spring warmth. Remus would have made them all tea”bless him, he insisted on pampering all the girls in the house”and they could have pretended, for just a few hours, that they weren’t in hiding, that the Fidelius charm over the house wasn’t the only thing keeping them from torture and death. But it wasn’t a normal day, and she would not leave the house until she heard a shred of news.
Andromeda clutched Teddy closer to her, fearing for the newborn’s parents. She had just re-entered the kitchen, thinking that perhaps she ought to eat, when the intruder alarms went off.
Impossible, she thought, as she ran to place Teddy in his bassinet and retrieve her wand. We’re under the Fidelius Charm. No one can find us unless…
Unless…
Her breath stopped. If the Death Eaters were here, then that meant…
But as she peered out the curtains, there were no Death Eaters. There was only a stocky red-headed man, walking slowly towards her front porch. Recognizing a Weasley brother, Andromeda opened the door a crack. If a Weasley was here, then Kingsley, their Secret-Keeper, must have sent him.
The red head bobbed closer, and Andromeda realized that he was the second of Molly’s sons. “Charlie?” she asked, surprised. Why wasn’t he in Romania?
He looked up, and Andromeda was shocked to see how haggard he looked. His face showed the traces of a bloody nose, and dark circles surrounded his eyes. But it wasn’t his physical appearance that stopped her in her tracks; it was the aura he carried around him of one who was bringing bad tidings. The pain of loss showed in his eyes, in the way he seemed bent with sorrow, in the very air around him. A vise closed around Andromeda’s heart, and suddenly she knew exactly how Margaret’s mother had felt those many years ago. She opened the door fully and faced him as he ascended the steps of the porch.
“It’s Dora, isn’t it?”
Charlie could only nod, his eyes full of unshed tears. “Yes. Her and Remus.”
Andromeda fell to her knees.
*****
The next day was a blur. Charlie had told her of Voldemort’s defeat, how Harry Potter had taken care of him once and for all. Then he had insisted she come with him to Hogwarts; everyone was gathered there, and it wouldn’t be good for her to be alone. But didn’t he understand? She was alone, now. It almost felt as if Andromeda Tonks had ceased to exist. She was dead, too, gone as surely as her husband and daughter. All that remained was an empty shell, a body that could still think and breathe but that could feel nothing.
This was so much worse than Ted’s death. When Ted had passed on, she had still had Dora to cling to. Now she had no one.
Andromeda had always been more prone to empathy than her siblings, a fact that Bellatrix and Narcissa had exploited and that their mother had never understood. As Andromeda had grown up, she had learned to shut off her emotions, the better to fit in with the family. It had taken Ted to draw her feelings out again; Ted with his jovial laugh, his love of life, and his ability to nurse an emotionally starved teenager back to health. He had taught her how to live again, and then he had given her Dora, the daughter who showed her how to laugh. But how could she laugh now? How could she ever laugh again? Was it possible to go on living when those who had taught her how were gone?
But it was easier to go along with Charlie than to explain, so she had packed an overnight bag, scooped up Teddy, and followed him to the scene of the worst destruction she had ever witnessed.
Debris was everywhere. Shards of glass littered the steps; blood and burns stained the once pristine lawns of her alma mater. Craters from missed spells pockmarked the soil, and the occasional giant footprint marked a sharp indent in the landscape. As Andromeda looked around, she could only wonder: was that where Dora had fallen? Had Remus been beside her, or had he died first, thinking his wife was home and safe? Were they even aware that their child was an orphan?
She tripped on a chunk of stone, and would have fallen if Charlie had not steadied her. For reasons she couldn’t fathom that one moment almost broke her, but she held her head high and refused to acknowledge the burning sensation in her eyes. Andromeda Tonks might have been gone, but Andromeda Black was still very much there”and Blacks never, ever wept in public.
Charlie led her to a room off the Great Hall, where all the dead had reverently been placed until funeral arrangements could be made. There were at least fifty bodies, perhaps more, and at first Andromeda walked in a daze past dozens of other mourners. She was afraid to look down, afraid to see who else she might have lost. Charlie seemed to understand this; he touched her elbow lightly, and she followed him to where her daughter now rested without once looking away from his trademark Weasley hair.
She hardly noticed when he stopped and almost ran into him. “Sorry,” she whispered. She closed her eyes, steeling herself, and gripped Teddy to her as tightly as she could without hurting him. She hoped he would stay asleep. It did not matter that he was only weeks old; she did no want him to remember his parents this way. But who else could she give him to?
It was just her now; her and one tiny infant. Andromeda took a deep breath and opened her eyes.
Dora and Remus lay side by side, serene and untroubled. Dora’s hair was her natural mousy brown, and suddenly this upset Andromeda. She was sure that if Dora had a choice, she would want her hair to be her favorite garish shade of pink when they laid her to rest. And why, oh why did she have to look so peaceful? If it had not been for her chalk-white face, Andromeda could have imagined Dora waking up from a deep sleep and assuring her mum that everything was fine now, that they could all go home together and make a cup of tea to steady her nerves. But the minutes ticked on, and there was no sign of movement, no rise and fall of her chest or telltale twitch of an eye. Andromeda choked back a sob as she knelt by her daughter’s lifeless shell, and in a rush Andromeda Tonks pushed her way past Andromeda Black’s emotionless front and she could feel again.
But why now? She didn’t want to feel; the numbness was almost better than this crushing agony. Her body wracked with heaving sobs that she could no longer control, and Teddy soon added his mewling protests when her crying woke him. Andromeda held her daughter’s lifeless hand and cried until there were no tears left in her, almost oblivious of her grandson in the face of her overwhelming grief. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair that his was happening. How could the world take her darling away from her? A parent should never have to bury her child!
It was Teddy that made her regain control. Andromeda realized it was not only her sobs that had woke him; she had pulled Teddy so tight to her body that he was almost smothered. She gave him some breathing room and shushed him as her sobs gradually faded. Her breathing steadied slowly, and she suddenly realized that Charlie Weasley was kneeling next to her with his arm around her shoulders. Tears were coursing silently down his face as he stared at the body of his former classmate, but he seemed too tired to notice.
Andromeda awkwardly patted his arm. The Black in her scowled at the need for comfort, but the grieving mother appreciated the gesture. “Thank you.”
Charlie just shook his head. “It isn’t much, but it helped my mum...”
“What?” Andromeda’s heart stopped again. Why had Molly been here?
“It…Fred…” Charlie gestured to a body a few meters away, and abruptly buried his face in his hands as his shoulders shook with silent, helpless sobs.
“Oh…” A new wave of hopelessness crashed over her. Not a Weasley. She knew Molly had lost both her brothers in the first war; now she had lost a son, as well. Andromeda was not the only grieving mother.
She had thought she had no tears left, but a fresh river flooded out of her eyes as she stared at Fred Weasley’s supine body. Where was his twin? Was the rest of the family all right? In her own grief, she had not even thought to ask about the state of her friends. She supposed she ought to feel ashamed, but the numbness had returned, and she found she couldn’t.
“Mum,” Charlie said suddenly, wiping his eyes. “Mum, why are you back here?
Andromeda glanced up and was shocked at the changes in her friend. Molly, once so plump, seemed a mere shadow of herself. Her very essence seemed limp with fatigue, her eyes wide with shock. She barely noticed anything around her; she just knelt at Fred’s side and absentmindedly stroked his hair.
Charlie hauled himself off the floor and hurried to his mother. “Mum, have you slept?” he asked gently. Molly ignored him, so he carefully grabbed her chin and forced her to face him. “Mum,” he repeated, “have you slept at all?”
Molly finally seemed to notice him. “No, dear, I haven’t.”
Charlie took her hands in his. “You need to sleep, Mum. Come with me, we’ll get you a potion…” But he broke off as Molly shook her head violently.
“Not yet, Charlie. I need to be here…”
“No, you don’t, Mum, you haven’t slept in days…”
“Charlie!” she snapped. “Please, just let me sit with your brother.”
Charlie’s shoulders sagged with defeat, and Andromeda stepped in. “I’ll stay with her, Charlie. You must be starved; go get something to eat.”
“I can’t, I need to look after Mum. I wasn’t here when I should have been; I can’t let her down now.” Charlie’s shook his head helplessly, and Andromeda was struck by how very pathetic he looked.
“When did you get here?” she asked quietly. “And have you had anyone look at your nose?” It still looked swollen, and the dried blood beneath it looked rather horrific now that she was paying attention.
“Oh…I got here this morning, after…after it was all over. And no, I haven’t. I’ve had…other things…on my mind.”
Despite herself, Andromeda’s curiosity peeked from beneath her depression.
“How did your nose get hurt, Charlie? If you weren’t here for…well…”
Stupid, stupid. That was why he was so depressed…he hadn’t been here to fight. And she had reminded him of that.
But Charlie, thankfully, let it slide. “George,” he answered morosely. “He decked me. I should have known better than to tell him it was my fault…but I felt like it was, since I wasn’t here…”
“Hold still,” Andromeda said. She carefully juggled Teddy so that she could get her wand out. Concentrating, she pointed it at Charlie’s nose and said, “Episkey.”
The swelling went down, and Charlie sighed in relief. Andromeda tried to be happy, but the incident had reminded her of all the times she had used that spell on Dora, and she found she was once again on the verge of tears.
“Feel better?” she asked, trying not to sound as miserable as she felt.
Charlie nodded gratefully, but his eyes filled up again at the sight of his mother, who was once again stroking Fred’s hair. After whispering his thanks he rushed out of the room, almost barreling into other mourners.
Poor Charlie. And Poor Molly. Andromeda supposed she had better do as she had promised. Still keeping a tight grip on Teddy, she knelt awkwardly next to her friend. “Hello, Molly,” she said weakly.
“Andromeda,” Molly said back, with a shadow of a smile, but it abruptly faded when she looked at the bodies of Remus and Dora. She seemed to struggle for words for a moment, and finally asked, “How are you?”
Andromeda shook her head. “You’ve seen me better, I’m sure.”
The ghost smile appeared again. “As I’m sure you’ve seen me.”
They both sat in silence for a moment, until Teddy decided to let them know he was hungry.
“Oh,” Molly breathed, looking down at him. “Oh, Andromeda, he looks just like his mum.”
“I know,” Andromeda said, trying hard not to sob again. “Except his eyes. His eyes are most definitely Remus’s.”
“May I hold him?” Molly asked hesitantly.
“Yes, of course,” Andromeda answered, and carefully delivered Teddy into her waiting arms.
“Hello, dear,” Molly said softly. “Aren’t you beautiful.”
Teddy looked up and smiled at her. “Oh!” Molly said, looking surprised. “Isn’t he too young to be able to do that?”
Andromeda shrugged. “You have much more experience than me, Molly.”
Molly smiled back at him, a genuine smile, though it was bittersweet. “You’re a very special little boy, you know.”
Teddy wailed again. He could not be kept waiting when his stomach was empty.
“Here,” Andromeda said. “I have a bottle with me.” She pulled it out and gently took her grandson back.
As Teddy sucked away greedily, the moment of merriment faded. Andromeda glanced at Molly. “I still can’t believe it’s all over.”
Molly shook her head. “Neither can I. But I’m glad you weren’t here, Andromeda. It was…horrific.” Molly looked on the verge of tears again. “I had never killed anyone before. I don’t ever want to again, no matter how necessary it might be. I’m just…I’m just not cut out for wars.”
“Molly,” Andromeda asked hesitantly. Did she really want to know this? “Do you…do you know who killed Remus and Dora?”
Molly nodded. “I heard that Dolohov killed Remus. But…oh, Andromeda…Bellatrix killed your daughter. And then I killed her.”
Andromeda didn’t know what to say. She had suspected, she had guessed…but it was another thing entirely to deal with the reality that her own sister had killed the most precious person in her life.
Molly was sobbing again. “I’m sorry, dear…I…I killed your sister…”
“Bellatrix is no sister of mine.” Andromeda hardly recognized her voice; it was a snarl, an animal sound, and Molly looked up in alarm. “She disowned me a long time ago. We haven’t spoken for years.” Andromeda fought to control her fury, taking deep breaths. Why did it have to be Bellatrix? Why not some stranger? How much more complicated could grieving become?
When she could speak normally again, she looked Molly square in the eye and said, “Thank you, Molly, for avenging my daughter’s death. You are more of a sister now than Bellatrix ever was.”
She wondered vaguely how Narcissa had fared in all this. Ah, well, plenty of time to find that out later…
“How can we move forward?” Molly asked, tears still streaming down her cheeks. “Families divided, parents…parents outliving their children…” she began to sob quietly again, one hand clutching that of her dead son.
Andromeda put her bottle down, ignoring Teddy’s protests to reach an arm around her friend. She struggled to keep the tears from her own voice as she looked at her own daughter and son-in-law, and then at the grandson they had left her.
“We keep living the way we always do: one step at a time. Because, as much as we’ll miss them…” and she stopped as her voice caught.
Teddy wailed again, and Molly smiled weakly at the little boy. “There are others who still need us now,” she finished, and Andromeda nodded.
“Exactly,” she said.
She picked up the bottle again to quiet Teddy.
“Well,” said Molly slowly, “how about we see to getting you a room for tonight? I’d invite you to the Burrow, but we haven’t seen it yet…”
“It’s fine,” Andromeda said. “I imagine most people are just finding a spot on the floor of the castle.”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Then I’ll do that as well. I’m sure the school desks won’t protest at spending a night as a bed and a bassinet.” She had always done well at transfiguration.
As they stood up, they took another long look at their lost loved ones. “I’ll be back, Dora,” Andromeda whispered. “And I’ll see you, too, Remus.”
She turned her back on the dead and shifted her focus to the living. “Now, Molly, Charlie was right. We should both really get a potion and try to sleep…”
The Women Who Won by Laurelyn
Chapter Notes: First off: This is Jo's world; I am only visiting. Second: I AM SO SORRY!!! I did not realize until today that it's been almost three years since the last update. It's no excuse, but in that time I've dealt with poor health and a hospital stay, a death in the family, a psychotic roommate with a rifle, and the increasing pressures of university life. (Only six months to graduation!) I hope this chapter is nice and long enough to make up for the wait somewhat. Enjoy!
Chapter Endnotes: I refuse to promise any more updates soon, but rest assured it will not take a year. : ) Please review...if you think I deserve reviews after that long wait, anyway...