Well, I had earned another detention with Snape. Therefore, the night that was meant to be spent at my first Quidditch practice was instead spent in Snape's gloomy office sorting through old punishment cards.

"Miss Lestrange," he said upon my arrival, giving me that smile I hated. "I have your detention task ready."

"Yes, sir. What is it?" I asked bitterly.

He pointed to several boxes and said, "Lately, Mr. Filch has wanted to sort through these. They are old files containing notations of former Hogwarts students - their crimes and their punishments. Many of the cards have been ruined. I need you to recopy these and put them back in their boxes in alphabetical order without magic. Understand?"

"Yes," I grumbled.

"Yes, sir."

"Yes, sir."

"Get to work," he said. "Why don't you start with these boxes? You may see some - ah - names that are quite familiar to you in here."

"Yes, sir."

I knelt down on the floor and began to pull out the cards. The first one, to my surprise, read, Rodolphus Lestrange. Cursed first year in hallway. First year's face bright blue and covered in orange spots; head expanding at rapid rate. Week of detention.

I felt Snape's eyes on me and hastily began to recopy it. Once I was finished, I pulled out the next one, which wasn't any better ...

Rodolphus and Rabastan Lestrange. Jinxed three third years in Great Hall. Third years now in hospital wing with rash. Week of detention.

How many weeks of his school years did my father spend in detention? It wasn't exactly a surprise, based on how things had turned out. But the next card caught my attention a bit more.

Bellatrix Black. Used illegal jinx on first year. First year's hair caught fire and burned off; currently in hospital wing. Week of detention.

"Isn't it great knowing that they, just like you, were in detention constantly?" Snape said after I pulled this one out and stared at it.

"Yeah," I groaned. "Real great."

I pulled out the next card, which gave me more of a shock than anything else.

Bellatrix and Andromeda Black. Vandalized school property by damaging gargoyle by use of illegal hex. Two weeks of detention.

Andromeda? Andromeda? How in Merlin's name could she have received detention? Had Bellatrix made her do it? Most likely. But Andromeda said they had been close. Close sisters didn't really get each other into trouble like this, did they? But as I recopied the names, I remembered the time I had covered for Dora one summer night after her sixth year, when she was desperate to see her boyfriend after Ted and Andromeda had forbid her from doing so. Both of us had been punished as hard as the other.

I returned to the cards. Was it even necessary to keep them? Couldn't these old crimes and punishments just die? He had totally done this on purpose, of course. Snape wanted me to sort through these cards just so I would be affected like this. I was determined not to show any reactions, though, so I carried on with the cards. Occasionally I saw Andromeda's or Narcissa's name crop up again with Bellatrix's. The Lestrange brothers appeared often.

Finally Snape dismissed me. It was extremely late and past curfew, but I didn't head for the dormitories. Instead I silently moved through the entrance hall to the castle grounds. Going outside into the dark was the only thing I felt like doing.

I went to the edge of the forest and sat near the trees. I knew nobody could see me from here. I was far from Hagrid's hut, staring across the lake. The black water rippled as the stars and moon reflected on it. The night was so clear, in fact, that I could spot the familiar constellations in the reflection.

There was Gamma Orionis, the star I usually looked for. It seemed to shine brighter than the rest tonight, though I knew I was just imagining this. As I had learned in Astronomy, Gamma Orionis was simply the twenty-seventh brightest star in the sky. But tonight, in my eyes, it was number one.

I sighed and rested my chin against my knees, thinking about how things just weren't fair. I knew life wasn't fair; everyone knows that. But I just wished things could be a bit fairer for me.

It wasn't fair that my parents had left me when I was young. It wasn't fair that I didn't know everything I wanted to know. It wasn't fair that Draco Malfoy, my cousin but ultimately my rival, probably knew my parents better than I did. It wasn't fair that Andromeda wouldn't tell me anything. It wasn't fair that Snape made me go through those cards just to torment me. It wasn't fair that things had come to this and now I was constantly on the verge of snapping and getting sent to Azkaban.

My eyes filled with tears, turning the lake and stars to watery ink. It wasn't fair that Sirius had to go. It wasn't fair that Bellatrix had to kill him.

I looked away from the lake and the stars. To the right, I saw a tiny black snake slithering over the grass, moonlight shining on its scales. I closed my eyes and this vision burned inside my head. I felt myself drifting away, but the snake scales were still printed in my mind ...

I was falling through darkness again. It wasn't the first time I had experienced this sensation. The darkness seemed endless, but eventually I hit ground.

I was in a forest, a giant forest. The trees were huge, their trunks large and round, seeming to go up forever. Their roots jutting from the ground were nearly impossible to climb over. I began to walk. I lifted my foot over one of the roots and stepped down. I tripped, and was on the ground.

Several snakes slid out from behind the tree closest to me. There were countless numbers of them, each about the same size. But they weren't normal snakes. These snakes were emerald green, so bright they burned my eyes. They looked like they were glowing. I had never seen anything like them, not even in my Defense Against the Dark Arts books.

Suddenly they were crawling all over me, securing me to the ground. I couldn't get up. I tried, but felt something heavy on my back. Then I realized it was a snake, just like the others, only much, much bigger. It glowed emerald just like the rest, but was about five times and round and ten times longer. It wrapped around me, squeezing me tighter and tighter, until it was about to devour me whole. Its mouth was up to my head ...

Then I felt a nudge on my side. It felt more real than the snakes that covered my body. I felt it again. With a gasp, my eyes snapped open. I was looking at the lake again.

I found myself shaking and covered in sweat. There was also this uncomfortable feeling, like the snakes were still crawling on me.

"Hey, are you all right?"

I heard a voice, but was too unsettled to know where it had come from. Something in the back of my mind told me that whoever was talking was also the one who had nudged me awake.

"Are you all right?" the voice repeated.

I looked over and saw a face in front of me. It took me several seconds to realize who it was, but as my eyes focused I saw that it was Theodore Nott. What was he doing out here this late?

I couldn't speak. I opened my mouth, but no sound came out.

"Listen, I can take you to the hospital wing if you need it."

"No ... " My voice came out rough. "I'm - I'm fine ... just ... bad dream ... that's all ... "

"Yeah, you looked like you were dreaming. It must have been a pretty terrible nightmare."

"Yes," I said, finding my voice at last. "Yeah, a nightmare ... well ... " I stared at the lake again and remembered what had confused me. "What in Merlin's name are you doing out here at this time?" I demanded.

"I could ask you the same thing," he replied.

"I just ... wanted some time alone. I didn't feel like going to bed. Obviously I needed to, though."

"You sure did. And as for your question ... maybe I just wanted some time alone too."

I looked at him, puzzled. "Why would you need time alone?"

"To think," he said. "Why else?"

I sighed and looked at the lake without answering.

"I can take you back to the castle," he said.

I glared at the water and snapped, "I don't need any help, especially from a Slytherin. Especially from you."

I tried to stand up but still felt shaky. My legs trembled and collapsed. He caught me and held me up.

"Let me go," I snarled. "I'm capable of getting back on my own, thanks."

He released me, and I began to walk off, trying my hardest to stay steady. He followed me along the lakeshore.

"What do you want?" I asked angrily. "You don't have to follow me back!"

"I'm not following you!" he said. "I'm going back, too! I need to sleep just like you."

"Well, go ahead of me, then!"

He didn't listen, but walked by me still and asked, "What were you dreaming about?"

I stopped and turned to glare at him. "Why do you want to know? It's none of your business. If you hadn't noticed, I was having a nightmare that I'd rather not think about right now."

"You know, a lot can be interpreted from dreams," he said.

"I know that. I took Divination for three years, but it's not like my dreams ever held any secrets! Now you can leave me alone!"

I began to run toward the castle doors. When I heard his footsteps crunching the leaves behind me, I whipped my wand out and pointed it at him.

"Listen, if you don't stop following me, I'm going to curse you. You know what I can do when I get upset, and you're pushing it really far."

"All right," he said. "I'll let you go."

"Thank you."

I turned around and trotted back to the oak front doors and was about to reach for the doorknob when I stopped. I turned around and saw Nott standing exactly where he had been several seconds before. I sighed and walked back to him. "Aren't you coming back inside?"

"I was waiting for you to enter the castle so you wouldn't think I was following you," he hissed. "What do you want? Do you want me to come with you or stay behind? Make up your mind!"

I turned to face the greenhouses without looking at him. I was beginning to get frustrated, not just with him, but with myself for being so quick to judge, so I said, "Fine. Come with me. But first, will you tell me why you were out here this late?"

"Well, it's not your business," he said, "but I'll tell you. I do this a lot. I never get caught sneaking out. I just have a lot of things on my mind, so going outside at midnight helps this. I know you're wondering what I have on my mind, so fine - I'll tell you. You may or may not know this, but my father is a Death Eater."

I thought about this for a moment and remembered the Department of Mysteries battle ... Lucius Malfoy had said, "Leave Nott, leave him, I say ... " [*]

"Yeah. I may have heard his name somewhere."

"So you know that," he said. "So there. Both of us have parents who are Death Eaters. You would understand that, wouldn't you?"

"Well, sure," I said. "Is your mother a Death Eater as well?"

"My mother's dead," he said. "She died when I was young."

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said, and while I meant it I didn't really sound sorry.

"Don't be sorry. Point is, my father - being the Death Eater that he is-has his heart set on me becoming a Death Eater when I'm out of school, or earlier, if possible. However, I don't want to be a Death Eater."

"And why wouldn't you want to be a Death Eater?" I asked. "Aren't all Slytherins - ?"

He interrupted me. "I knew you were going to give me that. The answer is no, not all Slytherins want to be Death Eaters. I believe your aunt was in Slytherin? She's not a Death Eater, is she?"

"Narcissa isn't, but she's as good as! Her husband and sister both - "

"Your other aunt," he said.

"Oh." True, Andromeda had been a Slytherin, and she was as far from a Death Eater as possible. "Yeah."

"Besides, it's not like all Gryffindors are good," he said. "Look where Peter Pettigrew ended up."

"Okay, okay! I see your point!"

"Yes, well, that's about it. I get stressed enough thinking of becoming a Death Eater one day. I know there's no way out. What my father wants, my father gets."

"Oh," I said. "Then ... why are you telling me this? Is it safe to assume you haven't told anyone this before? Why me?"

For once, he looked embarrassed. "I don't know ... I guess, since I found out who you were, I felt some sort of...connection to you. You know ... I'm a Slytherin but I don't fit in ... you're a Gryffindor that doesn't really fit in ... we both have parents who are Death Eaters ... "

"Yes, but we're not alike at all," I said. "And I do belong in Gryffindor - "

He snorted. "Yeah, right. A Lestrange never belongs in Gryffindor. Neither does a Black, which you are as well. Isn't it common knowledge that Black equals Slytherin?"

Feeling angrier, I said, "There are exceptions! And I'm hardly a Lestrange - my parents haven't exactly raised me, have they? You know, I think the Sorting Hat places more value on character than blood, really."

"Right. Well, whatever. That's my story, and I'm leaving now. It's late."

"I had no idea," I said sarcastically. "I guess I'm leaving too."

I walked toward the front doors once again. This time Nott followed and entered the castle behind me. I began to walk toward the grand staircase as he went left toward the dungeons. I stepped on the top step and said awkwardly, "Well ... uh, thanks for sharing your story."

He shrugged, said, "You're welcome, I guess," and continued to the dungeons.