Companion to And What If They Were Lovers? & And What If He Faded into the Background?
By ThatRomantic
There was a pronounced awkwardness in the room now that Rose and Scorpius had left. The four adults were sitting in Malfoy Manor in a silence that was as thick as treacle. Ron shifted nervously next to his wife of twenty years, desperately wanting to break the ice.
“I love what you’ve done with the place,” he said without really thinking. Every head in the room, including the portraits and the house-elf that had come in to ask if the guests wanted anything more to drink, turned to the tall, ginger haired man. All reactions were different: Astoria had raised a single eyebrow, Hermione’s mouth was hanging open with disbelief and a red flush; but it was Draco’s reaction that surprised him the most. He seemed to be both offended and angry at the comment, wearing a threatening scowl as if daring the other man to say more. He suddenly realised that he was in the same room he had been in all those years ago.
“Yes, well... I didn’t particularly like the house at the time of your last visit,” Draco gritted out. Astoria put a reassuring hand on her husband’s arm “ but he didn’t seem to calm down. It was only when his grey eyes met Hermione’s honey-brown that the tension visibly left his body.
Ron was immensely confused by this. What was that about? Why was it that Malfoy could not be calmed by his own wife, but could by the gaze of the woman he had mercilessly insulted for seven years? The awkward silence became heavier in the atmosphere after that, but Ron snuck glances at the blonde across from him. Ron silently gloated to himself that he “ although grey “ still had hair. Despite Draco’s obvious hair loss he seemed not to have changed much. His hair was still white blonde, his nose was still pointed “ along with his chin “ and his eyes were still the steel grey they were at school.
What perturbed Ron to no end was that Draco’s silver gaze would occasionally flick to Hermione and soften. Ron noticed that he did not seem to want to make eye-contact “ in fact; the other man avoided her eyes completely. Draco’s gaze “ however unintentionally or briefly “ landed on Hermione’s breasts. When Ron looked closer at what Draco was doing “ having been ready to make a snide comment about his lack of subtlety “ Ron was disturbed even more when he saw Malfoy was looking at other specific places on her body. That in itself was annoying enough, but it was where his gaze wondered specifically that peeved him off. Ron knew those spots and he knew them very well: her left collarbone, where she liked to be kissed; her bellybutton, where she enjoyed to be licked; her long slender neck, where she was fond of being sucked; the outside of her right thigh, where she gained great pleasure at being stroked. The last one was most disturbing for Ron, and he felt his anger boiling in his blood at the simple idea of Malfoy knowing that intimate detail about his wife. Malfoy looked directly at Hermione’s breasts again “ the place she most loved any caress, the place that would send her flying over the edge into ecstasy. Malfoy’s eyes darkened at that point, and Ron inadvertently growled under his breath.
“I’m going to the loo,” he lied.
“Down the corridor and on the left,” Astoria said politely.
“Thank you,” Ron replied. He walked into the corridor from the room, directly to the door that had a sign that said BATHROOM on it. He took some deep, calming breaths “ like he had been taught by the woman he went to see about anger problems before Rose was born “ and did his business while he was there. Somehow, going for a piss always seemed to calm his frayed nerves. He sat down on the closed toilet seat to prepare himself for going back into the tense room for a few minutes. Once he had settled himself he left the bathroom, still with a little tension in his shoulders.
He was about to reach for the doorknob to re-enter the tense atmosphere, when a female hand reached out for his. He didn’t recognise it and, startled, turned around. He was faced with the dark haired woman that had been sitting opposite him.
“Don’t go in there,” Astoria said gently, “not yet. They need to work some things out between themselves.” Ron looked at her bewildered, unsure as to whether to be offended or worried.
She spoke again, smiling sadly. “He loves her, you know?”
“Who, Malfoy? No, he doesn’t “ he hates her, she hates him. They hate each other “ I don’t know where you get that idea from.”
“No, they don’t, at least not on his part. Draco and I aren’t in love “ we are close, but not in the way we should be as man and wife. It was merely a marriage of convenience “ for both our sakes really. We barely ever have sex, and when we do it’s not my name he screams in ecstasy, it’s hers.” Ron was struck dumb by this. There was clearly something more to them than he had first suspected, and against his better judgement, he waited with Astoria outside the large wooden door, hoping he was doing the right thing.
The door shut behind Astoria as she exited the room to ‘check if the house-elves were starting dinner.’ The tension in the room was a different kind from before Astoria and Ron departed. Hermione took a deep breath and asked the only question on her mind at that moment.
“How do you feel about this?” Draco looked up at her, slightly confused for a moment before realising the reason all of them were there in the first place.
“I can’t say it comes as a shock,” he said. “Not really,” he added after a pause. “After all, they’ve liked each other for so long it was almost inevitable that they got together.”
“Yes, I suppose so,” she said wistfully. “It feels like Karma’s finally caught up with me.”
“What do you mean?”
“You know,” she said, “after what happened between us...”
“Yes, I suppose you’re right.” There was another long pause before Draco spoke again.
“I saw you at your wedding,” he said rather guiltily. “You looked stunning.”
“Thank you.” After another pause she spoke again.
“I got pregnant “ you know? I was a year younger than Rose is now.” He looked up at her, shocked, and with hurt in his eyes.
“That’s what you really meant about Karma then?” She simply nodded. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Oh, come on, Draco. I was seventeen and we barely spoke. That was the year you... the year that... Would you really have wanted it? Would you really have brought a child into that world?”
“I suppose you’re right “ as always,” he said disappointedly.
“Plus, what would you have told your parents, your friends, your ‘master’? What would I have told my friends and family? No, it was for the best.”
“Yes, yes. Of course.” There was another tangible silence.
“Do you ever think about what it would have been like? If things were different?” She asked.
“All the time.”
“Me too.”
“I did it for you, you know?”
“What?”
“Becoming a Death Eater,” he said simply. “I hoped that if I was ‘in rank’ you wouldn’t be hurt.”
“Why did you care? You never did before.”
“I had my reasons, Hermione. Good reasons.”
“What were they?” she pushed. She was hoping she knew. She was hoping she guessed right.
“It doesn’t matter now,” he said, avoiding her gaze. She walked from the couch she was on to next to him on his. He still didn’t look up. She put a hand on his cheek and turned his head to face her.
“It does to me, Draco. Please tell me. Maybe I can put my heart to rest then.” He looked up and their gazes locked. He was instantly hypnotised by what he saw in her honey brown orbs.
“I cared because I love you.” He quickly tried to turn away but she wouldn’t allow it. Tears welled in her eyes.
“You loved me?”
“No, Hermione,” he said. At this she whimpered and it was her turn to look away. He caught her chin with his index finger and their eyes locked once more. “I love you. Present tense.” She gasped. After all these years, he still felt that? “But I also know that I can’t have you,” he continued. “We’re both married; our children are in love with each other and about to make us grandparents. I know, for a fact, that it will be torture watching you across the room and never being able to hold you the way I want. Seeing Scorpius and Rose living the life I wanted for so long with you, but “ as you say “ that’s how Karma catches up with you.”
She did not speak for a while, unsure as to how to take his confession. “I understand,” she said eventually through a closed throat and watery smile.
“May I have one last kiss? To say goodbye,” he asked.
“Yes,” she breathed. As soon as the word was out of her mouth, lips descended on hers. It was nothing like the ones they had shared twenty-five years before. It was soft and tender, full of promises and regrets; beautifully heartbreaking. It felt like they were making love to each other’s mouths. All the memories of their time together came rushing back. They were holding each other tightly “ never wanting to let go, never wanting it to end. Their tears slid down each of their cheeks, melding and becoming one. All too soon it ended, but they held on just a moment longer.
“I love you too, Draco.”
Rose and Scorpius were laid outside on the vast lawns of the Manor a few weeks later. They were cloud watching and the air was tranquil.
“Do you think they’ll ever stop loving each other?” Rose asked after a while.
“No,” Scorpius replied, “but I don’t think they’ll act on it, either.”
It was odd for the Seventh year couple to think that their parents had a life before them. It was even odder to know that they had a history.
“Do you think they know how obvious they were being?”
“No, I don’t.” They were talking about the day that both families had been at the Manor for the announcement the young couple had. Both teens noticed their parents trying to sneak glances at one another when they thought no one was looking. It saddened both of them to know it had come to this for the older couple, and neither could imagine the pain their parents were going through, or shame they would feel if anyone were to find out.
“Never leave us, Scorp,” Rose said after a while, placing a hand on her slightly swollen stomach.
“I’ll never leave you, sweetheart,” Scorpius replied.