Hey there,

Just, wow. One shots are usually harder for me to get into, because there’s only so many words that the author put everything in. But, just, wow. I must say, didn’t expect it to be Cormac at the end of the story, but I like it.

First off, love that you kept us in suspense about who you were talking about. I didn’t really know what time period it was in, so I didn’t know who it might have been that she was considering, but I did figure that it was Ron who was with another. Now that I see Cormac’s name though I feel like I should have figured it out, but I didn’t.

The emotions in this story are also amazing. I can imagine all the stuff that Hermione would have gone through whenever Ron was being his usual self, and to see them voiced out in a story in such a spectacular way is very nice. Hermione can sometimes be a hard character to write, but you did it very well. Same with Cormac. We don’t know a lot about him, but from what was giving to us in the books, I think that you have him completely spot on. He seems like a pushy guy who would have initiated it.

Also, the progression of the story really flows very well. I can see Hermione’s disgust because of who she’s with. And the more she thinks about it…well, why not? Cormac is probably the one person who can irritate Ron the most, so he really is the logical choice of who to make Ron jealous with. I wouldn’t say that he’s better then Ron, just that Ron can’t stand him due to his liking Hermione, and being better at Quidditch then him and all of that. Cormac was definitely the right choice in her mind, which is quite justified.

Great uses of imagery! I can picture this whole scene in my mind, step by step, and it’s very vivid and complete, which is an amazing thing for an author to accomplish.

I really can’t see anything to nitpick so I will just once more say that this one shot was absolutely amazing and I will definitely be checking to see if you have anything else I can read now.

~Alyssa

I think it should be a crime that this story doesn’t have more reviews. Someone recommended I read this, and I am so glad I did. I don’t usually read anything with Draco, because of how he’s portrayed in the book, but I find myself actually sympathizing for him. And I definitely don’t read this ship usually, which I’m starting to change my mind about.

I love that you took two people who really shouldn’t work, and put them together in such a way that it’s believable and I find myself wondering if this really happened. I never gave much thought to what might have happened to Draco after all was said and done, except for that snippet we saw of him in the epilogue. I never really thought that he might be regretting what he had done, and wishing things were different. After all, the stories just kind of made Draco seem like a real tool and I never liked him since he was always so mean to my favorite characters. But, you opened my eyes and showed me that he really is a character who has emotions and feelings and that maybe he really didn’t want to do things that Voldemort forced him to do.

I was also warned that this was a bit of a dark story. I can definitely see where that came from with all of the thoughts of the war and such, but I think that the darkness really gave a helping hand to making this story even more amazing. I’ve always associated Draco with darkness, though not Katie really. The final battle I do associate with some darkness though, so I guess that would make me think differently with Katie. I don’t know if that makes any sense at all there. I guess I’m just trying to say that the darkness really makes this believable. I don’t know if I would have ever in a million years believed that the two of them would get together if the story was a light and happy one. I mean, I don’t see what she could possibly see in him. But the dark tone in this story really makes the couple seem believable to me. I mean, anything can happen when you’re mourning something that happened, and you’re just trying to feel something, anything, to escape the pain.

The emotion just bleeds into this story though. It’s so spot on and accurate and I can feel what they’re both feeling. I can feel the loss of Fred for Katie, and I can feel the guilt that Draco has been carrying around with him since his sixth year. Reading the story it’s almost like I was drowning in pain and guilt also. You really brought that emotion to life which as a reader I absolutely adore.

I wonder how this story might have panned out if it was longer. I don’t know if the two of them would ever stand the test of time, but I find myself hoping that they would. They complement each other perfectly, and they are what each other needs, especially at the present moment, which leads me to believe that maybe they wouldn’t have stood the test of time. I mean, in the story they’re both in pain and both have things that they want to forget. Being together makes the pain fade for a while, and clears their mind enough to get through the day. But what happens when they aren’t in pain anymore? Will they stay together? Or was it only something that they both needed to heal? I find myself asking all of these questions and more as your story came to an end.

A fantastic story. I think you might have changed my mind about this ship, and I might just go and see if there are anymore that I want to read.

~Alyssa

Author's Response: Wow. Thank you so, so much for this beautiful, thorough review! I didn't think this story would be getting many more (if any) reviews, so it was a lovely surprise to see you left one. I am so glad this story changed your mind about Draco - in the books, I can't stand how he acts, but I feel like there is an opening for redemption in fan fiction because it's difficult to believe a person can be *all* bad. I agree that it is definitely a dark story, but I am happy to hear that it didn't mar the pairing for you. I might write more Draco/Katie in the (much later) future; it was definitely an interesting pairing to think about. Thank you again for leaving this incredibly well-written review, it's made my day :). xx Ariana

Hey there!

This is kind of a review for all of the chapters so far, because I just couldn’t stop reading once I started long enough to give a good review.

I must admit, the first thing that drew me into this story is the fact that it’s what might have happened if Voldemort never existed. I always wondered what might have happened, but I don’t think I have really ever stumbled upon a story that really takes that idea and explores it. I must say though, you did fantastic with this story.

I love that you don’t have Lily and Potter together in the beginning of the story, and that he isn’t the Head Boy. While we know he was indeed it in the Potterverse, it’s good to see a story where he isn’t all that he thinks he is. Don’t get me wrong, I adore the couple and think they’re wonderful together, but it is nice to read a new and refreshing point of view on something that happened.

I must also say that you really captivated me in this story. From the moment I started reading it, I couldn’t stop. I had to know what was coming next in the chapters. The story just sucked me in and didn’t let me go until I had no more chapters to read. You must write more soon, so I can keep reading the story.

You did a very good job with your oc Vanessa in this story. At first I had my doubts about her. I mean, pretty, charming, able to get Potter’s attention? I had to admit I was a bit worried. But those traits that you originally show us just worked into an overall bigger picture where those things aren’t really faulted against her in my opinion. She is a sound OC in my opinion, which I must just say great job on. She is one of the reasons I enjoy this story so much.

Overall, I just wanted to applaud you on the plot. It can be hard to write something that is from the AU world, and it’s most definitely hard to write something this good in that difficult setting. Also for keeping the characters in line! We don’t know a whole lot about this era, but I think you did a great job portraying the characters how they should be.

Now that I got all of that out of the way….write more soon! Please! I need to know what happens as this plot just continues to thicken. You have me hooked into this story, and I really need to know what happens next. I hope you update soon!

I hope to see more of this wonderful story, and I will definitely continue to read this until the end.

~Alyssa

Author's Response: Thanks for the long review! I am glad that you like the story so far. I spent a lot of time thinking about what would have happened in a world without Voldemort, and so am glad to hear that it seems realistic enough. I was worried that some of the choices I made (particularly pertaining to my characterization of James and Lily) would put off readers. And I am really happy that you like Vanessa. She is my favorite person to write in this story. She ended up sticking around for a bit longer than I had originally planned because I liked her so much.

Hey there!

Wow. A lot of emotion packed into a few words. I think you hit how people were feeling spot on in this story. After all, we basically did see at least that Remus and Sirius were both convinced the other leaked the information. It is only logical that all of them were thinking that the other betrayed the trust and are the reason they’re dead. Well, not Remus because he had no clue any of this was going on, and he most certainly wasn’t one of the people who the blame could have been shined on.

It’s interesting to see so many snippets in time, and I think that really helps to make the one shot really good. And the repetition of “I killed them” really strikes the message home that all of them in their own way contributed to their death. Yes, Peter might be the one who officially did it, because he’s the one who gave up a secret that he should have guarded with his life. But all of them were responsible and played a role in the deaths of Lily and James. It’s also interesting to see into Peter’s mind a bit, and to see how he felt like he had no choice. We all know that he shouldn’t have done it, but still, it’s interesting to see the mind of one who thought that he had absolutely no option. All he was trying to do was not get killed himself, but he did go too far with it, which you show when you said that he gave the Dark Lord the information of where they are and “I killed them”.

Bravo at really making me think about how they’re all somewhat responsible. I always just pointed the blame at Wormtail, because he is such an easy person to blame. But the one shot really shows us we can’t just do that. I really like that this one shot made me actually think about that. Thank you for that.

Great job, and I will look for more stories from you in the future.

~Alyssa

Author's Response: Thank you very much.

I must say. I don't tend to read a lot of historical stories, but this one intrigued me, and I honestly liked it a lot. I see someone else pointed out the few errors I also found, so I won't repeat them. Great job though! :D I'll have to look and see if you have anything else I can read now.

~Alyssa