After reading the "prequel" for want of a better word to this, I decided to check this fic out, and I'm glad I did. It was great! (Possibly better than the first one... but that was great too...). The way you intertwined the two different story lines was very effective. You have great plot ideas which make this kind of story really unique!

My favourite line was "Forget the Boy Who Lived. Harry was the Dad Who Lived." It simultaneously made me laugh and go 'aww'. Plus it was perfect for Harry's character.

Just one small thing - I would have liked it if you went into more detail about the issues between Ginny and Andromeda. I don't know, I was just curious after you made some comment about it.

Anyway, it was great how you tied two story lines down to really simple things, like love, and made them connect to your title as well. Great job!!

Author's Response: Yeah, I have to agree with you that this one is better than the last one--I guess that shows how my writing has improved and evolved over the years...Thank you for saying that I have great plot ideas. My favourite line is the same as yours--God knows how I came up with that. And I do plan to have some sort of follow-up about the issues with Andromeda and Ginny and Narcissa and everyone. Just not at the moment because I'm currently working on Checkmate, my WIP. Thanks for another one of your lovely reviews and I hope to see you in my inbox again soon. ~Soraya~

I enjoyed this fic - I thought you got into Andromeda's character really well. It was a great moment to place the story, and I liked your idea that she's more in shock and can't cry yet, but when Harry comes and takes responsibility away from her (by taking Teddy) that she can finally let go.

Unfortunately, I didn't quite like your Harry - I know he's only in the fic for a few lines, but some of his dialogue didn't quite sit right with me. I would have imagined him to have been more nervous when he arrived and not quite so good at saying what he meant. But maybe that's just my interpretation of him. I did like the last line thought, and how it connected to the beginning and brought Harry and Andromeda together nicely.

Another little nitpick - you've written "Therefore, she was considerably unsurprised to see Harry Potter..." - the considerably unsurprised seems a little awkward to me, perhaps something like 'not at all surprised' would have worked better?

Anyway, in general I did like this fic and how you showed Andromeda.

Author's Response: Thank you for the lovely review. I've never been very good with Harry for some reason-- that's why I don't write about him very often. Thank you for writing in!

This was really sad, but really well written. I love how you used second person - it made me feel really involved in the story, as if I was personally experiencing this. Using Ginny as your focalising character was also a nice touch, and that last line really sent chills down my spine.

I loved how you played with the reader's emotions - right until the end you make it seem like there's some hope, especially when Hermione finds something in a book, and then in the end it is heartbreaking.

I loved the spell as well - what an original and dark idea! And I loved the irony as well, that Harry's soul ends up fracturing into tiny pieces - almost as if he inadvertantly echoes Voldemort.

The only really tiny thing I didn't like so much was the opening paragraph. I can see that you were trying to give a sense of the setting, but it didn't draw me in so much. Sorry I can't really think of how you could have done it better... and anyway, by the end I'd almost forgotten about it because the rest was so amazing!!

One more thing - I really loved how Ginny's character came through, and how you showed her 'shattering' (for want of a better word) throughout the fic.

Author's Response: Wow, thank you for such an amazing first review! I really appreciate it. I'm glad you enjoyed the second person pov - I know a lot of readers don't, but it just came out that way. I find it heartbreaking as well. It was interesting to explore a 'what if?' for that Final Battle, especially since I really thought Harry might die at the time the last book was released. I don't know where I got the idea for the spell, but you are exactly right about how it mirrors Voldemort. It's bitter irony, something JKR didn't touch on much. I'm glad you kept reading in spite of the opening paragraph - I can see how it's a bit different than the rest of the story - thanks again for the lovely review!! ~Gina :)

So bitter sweet! I totally wasn't expecting his Dad to die... it was very sad. You wrote that bit nicely - there was no description of lots of tears and pain and all that, just some nice dialogue. I loved the way each vignette was interspersed with conversations with his Dad. It was also really interesting to show the Quidditch team from someone else's point of view, and how Ron affected them all. Your sense of character is great - I had a nice picture of Jimmy, his Dad, Ritchie and Demelza, which was a great achievement in such a short fic!!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! It suddenly occurred to me that we really don't know anything about the new kids in book six, and I thought they deserved a story. I'm glad you liked it!

I really liked this idea and you wrote it really well. Filtering everything through the mind of a 5-year-old was a really good idea and really effective. I have a few small things to say - firstly, I really loved how initially you referred to wizards as "it" instead of "he", but then when the Death Eater came into the boy's house, you changed and calle him "he". I liked the way you objectified wizards, so this seemed a bit strange to me. Also, you've used the word 'unexplainable' and whilst I think that's now an accepted word, it's meant to be inexplicable... but that's nothing major. Early on in the story you also wrote "I've another one before, as well..." - you're missing 'seen'.

Anyway, it was written really well and it was very haunting and effective. I loved the bluntness of your character - "Daddy cried for a long time, because Mummy and Emma werent asleep. They were dead." So yeah, great fic :)

Author's Response: Sorry about the mistakes -- I'll change them now! :D

Once again your portrayal of Lily and James was great and I liked the unconventional way you used to get them together.

I wasn't so sure about how you seemed to portray Lily's relationship with her friends... from what is known in canon, she seems like she'd be the loyal type who'd share everything with them and the way she just flippantly left them seemed a bit strange... but that's just my interpretation.

Anyway, I really enjoyed it, it was nicely written and your characters were great :).

Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm glad you enjoyed this take on it all. I find it amusing that you are picking on Lily and not any number of things I would have pegged, lol! ;) I see your point, but I would like to point out Lily wasn't being flippant when she left them: she was in a terrible, rotten mood. She didn't want to hang out with them, and they hardly noticed her lag behind. I can recall times when I didn't want to hang out with people, and I can recall times where I did just leave. As for her sharing everything, that's possible, but we don't know that for sure. And again - this thing with James is something she's not sure about, so maybe she didn't feel ready to talk with her friends about it. Or maybe she did off the page. ;) So that's where I'm coming from on Lily. I'm glad that little bit didn't distract from the rest of it - thanks so much for the review! I really appreciate your lovely compliments! ~Gina :)

Hello Jess, yes it's me again...

This is a fantastic poem. (As usual.) It really shows that scene in King's Cross so well... I loved the ending - That which you reviled has become your realitly, / For you are Death. That just really shows what Voldemort has become, and how in life what you fear most and try to escape will always come back to haunt you.

I think you did a great job here, as I think it's very hard to capture someone who is so completely inhuman. I think it's easier to write Tom Riddle (I've done that before), because at least there's a speck of humanity in there...

Anyway, I'm getting off topic here... the point is I think you've done a really good job with this.

~Katrina

Author's Response:

I will freely admit that I was in a very, very pissy mood when I wrote this. What I wanted was to focus on someone/thing that was more pathetic than I felt at the time (It's a long, long story, and no, it wasn't as big a deal as I made it out to be, lol. I was being very melodramatic at the time.) And really, what is more pitiful than that scrap of afterlife that had become Tom Riddle/Voldemort? He spent his entire existence instilling fear of him and of his name, and in the end, it created his own demise. No one  sympathised with him; only pity, if even that, remained. The kicker was that he did it to himself by being too thick to realise that there are simply things he doesn't understand, and that pretending things he doesn't understand don't exist doesn't make it so.

And now I've got off track, but thanks for stopping in. I know poetry isn't your thing, and really, it's not mine, either, but I'm glad you enjoyed it and got the point. 

Take care!

~Jess

Very sweet :). Wizard/Muggle interactions are really interesting to explore, and I thought you did this pretty well. It was interesting to see events and then hear Alice's voice in between, definitely a different way of writing. My only criticism is that I would have liked more - for example more detail on how Alice fell in love with Albus and a bit more about her character. Also perhaps you could have explored why Hugo is working in a Muggle establishment... or maybe not, it mightn't have really fitted in the story. Anyway, it was nicely written, and I had to laugh at Al and Alice together. Definitely a good read :).

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Like I said in reply to an earlier review, this was pretty much a drabble that got out of hand. I suppose the snippet-like quality of a drabble came over into this one-shot. In a drabble, you really can't explain very much of anything...

I'm glad you thought Al and Alice were funny together. I thought it was rather funny too. =)

Thanks for reading!

Beautiful! Your characterisation of Sirius was spot on - I can imagine him wanting to make the most of riling his family, particularly as he knows he won't be there to suffer the consequences.

His conversation with Regulus was sad - in a way I felt like hitting Regulus for so calmly accepting what his famil told him, but at the same time I sort of felt for him - the way you characterised him, it seemed that underneath he didn't agree with his family, but belonging somewhere was more important to him.

Bellatrix was deliciously cruel, though perhaps not quite as mad as we see her in canon. In fact, all the relatives were portrayed realistically - I liked the bit where Sirius sees his father raise an eyebrow the way he does. It was nice to see some similarity between Sirius and his family.

This is, in my humble opinion, the best line in this story: "Christmas at the Black house, he thought. It was like watching both a comedy and a tragedy at the same time." That's just so spot on, because the extreme lengths the Blacks go to and the way Sirius can rile them is comedic, yet it's tragic to know that this is his family.

So all in all, loved the fic :)

~Katrina

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much for the review, Katrina! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. I'm especially glad you thought Sirius was okay, because at one point I lamented being able to write him. But I guess I just can't write that particularly story, since it's still unfinished on my laptop and this one was a quick and fun write. I'm not sure about Regulus, but I do like to think that they were brothers and that there would have been some sort of relationship between them. Hee hee, your favorite line is different than mine, but I'm glad that one stood out too! I wrote this story just so Sirius could say "Happy Christmas, b****." Isn't that crazy? One can only imagine what Azkaban did to Bellatrix in terms of really driving her over the edge. Thanks again for the review, I really appreciate it! ~Gina :)

Hi Ariana,

Fantastic, brilliant, amazing story. I think it was really good the way you showed the Marauders falling apart, and yet throughout there was a sense of what had been. The individual scenes with each of the Marauders were so well-written, and just so perfectly in character. Remus seemed tired and sick of what life had dealt him, thought still resolute. Sirius was witty and always had a comeback ready, and yet even he couldn't be arrogant about this situation (I loved the last line in that part, about how he couldn't protect his friends.) Peter was lonely and I think you did something interesting here, as he seems to feel betrayed by the others, as they treat Lily like one of them etc. It's a nice parallel with what happens later. Lily's doubt was really great - obviously, as a reader, we knew she would make the choice to fight, but it was interesting to see her thought processes, which would be entirely realistic.

The way you tied everything in with the last bit about there being a traitor was great too - particularly as the first people to be 'accused' were Remus and Sirius, and Peter wasn't even mentioned.

Your writing was just perfect in this story. I particularly loved your dialogue, which is always hard to write - it showed so much character.

I also think the concept for this story was very good, as it shows how love and friendship can break down when doubt comes into play, particularly when it's caused by a war like this. I think for this reason that my favourite part was the interaction between Sirius and Remus, because of all the characters, I think they're the least trusting of each other, and it really shows how this lack of trust comes between their friendship.

So, great story, I really loved it :).

~Katrina

Author's Response: Oh! Thank you for this lovely review! This is my least favorite part about the Marauder-era, the part where their friendship begins to unravel and they all start to grow apart a little. I'm so happy you thought the characterization was all right. I struggled with that before, I think, and that's why I decided to take the class, so I'm glad it showed! But what I keep forgetting to mention, and what I think helped me just as much as the class, was the fact that Jess beta'd this story so well and gave such perfect advice as to how to make this story work. Without her, this story would not be remotely intelligible. Thanks again! xx Ariana