This poem is definitely an impacting poem. It's a big tearjerker. The constant use of rhyme and steady rhythm really gives this poem a good beat. Furthermore, your words really gave me a cause to celebrate. You are really an amazing poet. I only noticed one small mistake - how could a girl with jet black hair and green eyes look like a Weasley through and through? I liked that play on "Dumbledore's man, through and through" though. You really brought new meaning to my favorite quote from HBP. Your poem was really different, a good story told well in poetry. Great job!

I really liked this story. I'm a huge sucker of Broadway musicals, and always freak out when I see songfics based on Broadway musical songs. This story did not dissapoint me, either. I have a few things, though, that you may want to correct.



First and foremost, I want to ask you if you've ever read a songfic before. If you have, you will notice the song lyrics are in italics or are otherwise distinguished from the rest of the story. In case you are unsure, you put words in italics by surrounding them with the tags {} and {} only, without the brackets (I was afraid if I didn't bracket the tags, the review would become italicized.) Second of all, I don't get how the term "Beauty and the beast" refers to Harry and Ginny. While Harry isn't the nicest person at the time of his life, he's certainly no beast. Also, don't the song lyrics refer to physical characteristics? I understand where you are coming from, and know the song lyrics can be taken different ways, but I think some disscussion on how you can interpret the song lyrics is very important here.



Secondly, I think that the ending of the story is too cliche and storybook. You have a great romance story, and a great fic before it, but you end it in such a rushed way. I write one-shots a lot, and I understand the trouble of getting an entire story into one chapter which you don't want to be really long. However, you gave the fic a storybook ending that made it seem like you didn't care very much. Think about the ending of the musical (or even the Disney movie) Beauty and the Beast. Now, I haven't seen either in a while, but I do remember the ending wasn't very happy. Sometimes the best stories to read don't have happy endings. While it is hard to add such a low note such as Harry dying, Voldemort winning or something opposite of the ending you put to a story that can be viewed as cute, fluffy and romantic, your story isn't as fluffy as it seems. The too-happy ending makes the story seem almost fake. Harry and Ginny's romance really isn't a very happy one at all, and it's important that you adknowledge that.



Other than those few things, I really liked this story. Even if you don't edit your story, I think its important you remember those things for future stories. While I don't expect a sequel to this story, I'm looking foward to reading more stories, especially Broadway songfics, by you in the present.

I usually never read Harry/Cho stories, but I'm incrediably glad I've decided to read this. I think you portrayed the Chang family extremely accurately. Also, you really made me feel empathy to Cho when she came home after Cedric's death. The fact that Mr. and Mrs. Chang didn't know of Cedric's death until after Cho came home really showed how closed up Hogwarts was from the rest of the world, and almost was a hidden foreshadowing of the tyranny in the wizarding world to come. I think this story is really intriguing. I really don't read or ship Harry/Cho, and I still don't know why I clicked on this fic in the beggining, but I'm really glad I did. You get a 10/10 from me.

Hmm... this story is pretty good, it's definitely got potential, but it definitely needs a lot of work. First of all, in the summary you refer to Lily as a "he" several times. I think you meant to say "James", and if you put James, the summary would be spotless, but for now it just looks sort of wierd. As for the story, it definitely had potential but I was sort of confused. Sometimes, I couldn't tell whose point of view it was in. For example, in the first paragraph you rocket from describing Lily, to James trying his hardest, then back to Lily. I had to read that a few times before really understanding. I really don't think you should refer to Peter as an a-hole, even though it's probably true. Whose point of view is this in? Remember, Peter was a Marauder. Obviously, he was well-liked enough to hang out with James, Sirius and Remus for seven years. Who was saying that about him? His friends were too loyal to say that, and Lily probably wouldn't use such wording. There were a lot of grammerical mistakes, especially involving the quotes. "Him that close seems too close for comfort," was a very awkward pharase. I understand you were striving to be different, but it didn't work. I didn't like the wording at all. Otherwise, though this story has potential. I really like the idea. I also like how the Marauders talked about McLaggin, that was funny. I think you probably need a good beta to help you sort through this story. Is this your first story? I think you're a great author and have a lot of potential. Read through your story again and see what you can improve. I really hope this review wasn't too harsh, and I hope you do the best. I can't wait to see the next chapter!

Great job! I think you need to add the HBP cannon a little more subtly but other than that, excellent! Keep up the good work!

I'd just like to add to my other two reviews that making me cry is good. I cried for several days after, you know, the ending of HBP and its my fave book ever! I'm very anxious waiting for an update, though! I know you have written about a zillion other great fics, but this one really has some die-hard fans. Like me!

Author's Response: Ahah! Well, that's good to hear. Yes, HBP = pure luff. Everywhere. I'll try to update...I really will...I had the chapter planned out, too, and it DIED, but it does me good to know I have die-hard fans. *hug*

Wow I'm a Remus/Tonks shipper and have read all your R/T but cuz Tonks probably wasnt even born then, I am officially a Remus/Seriri shipper. Its so sad, though about going to the Shrieking Shack and all. Just curious, are you one of those famous Snape is a Vampire believer? Sorry, aint gonna happen Still one of my fave stories of all time though.

Author's Response: Haha! I think this is the first time anyone has ever said they ship one of my original pairings. That makes me feel absurdly special. *beam* I thought the Shrieking Shack scene was all right. A little vindictive, though. I hate doing stuff like that to Remus. And no, I don't think Snape is a vampire, don't worry about that! I just thought it was a nice ploy to sidetrack Seiri from the real issue at hand -- i.e., Remus is a werewolf. I'm not one for vampire-Snape myself. Thanks for the fab review!

This seems to be a really good story so far. I really like how you characterized the young Vernon Dursley ("B positive"!- that made me crack up hysterically) The only real error I saw was the fact that you didn't capitilize "Muggle." I don't often read long chaptered stories (I rarely get to second chapters) but I'm looking foward to reading the rest of your story. ~Lilypudding~

Funny... I love this whole thing! I don't like how at the A/n at the end of the first song you use chatspeak, but other that that, amazing! Absolutely hilarious! I can just imagine Sirius singing... my computer screen would break! Funny!

definitely 10/10. *sniff* i wouldnt mind that as sorta like an alternate ending to HBP- how lupin and tonks got together was kinda lame, unless u considered the circumstances- u know, dumbledores's death and everything. have u ever considered making up your own characters and writing a story sorta like this, or a novel, or even a play? you would be really good at the real deal, you're amazing at fanfic.

Author's Response: It wasn't so much how Lupin and Tonks got together that bugged me -- I actually rather liked that -- but the lack of story behind them. I was like, "WHAT --? HOW --?!" And then the lack of action. We want snoggage, darnit! Haha. Hmm, I've never considered turning this particular storyline into anything original. I do write original fiction, quite a lot (I aim to be a novelist), but to use this...hmm. I like it! Thanks for the input!