Artimus P. Moneytrouser - son to Atticus Q. Moneytrouser founder of Moneytrouser Incorporated (the prestigeous company that attacks goths through clothing) lived an easy life abusing his slaves and women wenches till the age of 60 when he realized he wanted to be imortalized in history, so he hired J.B. Rowling to write a series of exciting teen novels to shake the worlds foundation and possibly scare it through literature! Having hired J.B., his pirated novels became a sucess and he took all credit from J.B. throwing her out onto the streets to be eaten away by the badgerous carnivog (a cross between a badger and hog, the animal that inspired the less popular Gruggly Crunch house in the Harry Potter series) Artimus plans on filing lawsuits on J.K. Rowling for stealing the ideas he stole from J.B. He plans on dying at the age of 54 because anyone past that age becomes obsessed with cats.