Hi there! I have fourteen stories up, and my favorites are Ripping at the Seams, At the Bus Stop, and Worms for Teeth. Thanks for stopping by!
Nice finish! Poor Regulus-- Do we ever find out what happens to him out of all this? I like how you managed to finagle it to Lily and James getting together, too. I've read so many Lily/James fics and every time I grin anew when they, after years of unrequited love and hatred, finally get together. So sweet.
Wow, this is really good! I didn't read the synopsis before reading it, and was quite surprised, in a good way. Hmm... is there a Lily/Regulus ship, or animosity, blossoming here? I loved this, please continue!
Oh dear this is so depressing.... Excellent job, then.
Author's Response: Haha! Thanks? lmao
Good start! I want to see what happens!
Author's Response: thanks:D The next part will be up.... when it\'s up. lol.
Wow, this was beautiful. Right on the favourites. Really, really well done. It was funny, I was listening to Peter Gabriel, my favourite artist, and then I read this poem, but the funny thing was there's a song on the same album called "More Than This" (which, by the way, I sincerely recommend) which actually fits this poem pretty well. Hmm... Well, this was great. I was reading along and I stopped for a moment at the butterfly scene, and thought, "Hmmm... Potter?" :) At times I wondered if Gemma was going to be the Grey Lady (even though she is Ravenclaw's daughter), because of the repetition of "grey". But no, you kept to canon, which was nice, and this was a very well-written poem about a feeling we all can relate to.
Author's Response: I\'m glad that you liked the piece! I haven\'t heard the song you are refering to, I will try to check it out sometime. It\'s not entirely cannon since Harry is not supposed to be a descendent of Godric, but I figure that if the Potters come from an illigitimate line it might not be in the books and could squeak through anyway. Thanks again for the kind words and the review!
Oh my goodness, this is incredible! So poignant and beautiful. Flawless. I felt like I was skating along clouds. I kept expecting to fall through suddenly and be let down, but I never did. :) Fantastic job. Excellent.
Author's Response: Goodness gracious! I\'m so pleased that you enjoyed the whole thing. Thank you so much for the review!
YES! Excellent! My friend Breanne constantly refers to this exact moment, page 625 (she has it memorized) in the American edition, when Ron and Hermione kiss, as her favorite moment in any book ever. I don't love that second to that level of devotion, but this is quite nice!
Author's Response: Thank you! I just think Jo handled Ron and Hermione\'s relationship so well!
*grins* This looks very promising! And perhaps some *nudge nudge* romance between the Potions professor and Brethany (who, by the way, has a very interesting name)? Don't mind me; I pair everyone and everything. This is really good, though! I look forward to seeing more.
Author's Response: Am I so obvious? I\'m uncertain about a romantic relationship between the two, but there are some definite sparks flying between Severus and Brethany. Here\'s a hint: they enjoy arguing with each other entirely too much...remind you of anyone?
Oh, this was so sad!
This line really got me:
"Yeah, there’s a lot of books,” Lily agreed. “I could spend all day in here, but I doubt Mum would let me.”
She then smiled at them.
He smiled too, but really all he wanted to do was cry.
Oh dear, that was so sad... My prediction, before moving on to chapter three (you got the new chapters up really quickly, by the way): Bellatrix realizes what Snape's going to do and somehow screws him over! Am I right? Only one way to find out... *clicks "next" button*
Author's Response: Thanks for coming back! :D I\'m glad you\'re still enjoying. As to your prediction . . . you\'ll simply have to read on, muahaha. Although I see that you already have. :P
She looked up at him with wide eyes. “But — that doesn’t make any sense. We would all die if there was no sun,” she said solemnly, with the straight-forward logic only a nine-year-old could have.
His eyes stung. “Exactly,” he choked out.
Oh, what a sad, sad, line...
Again, so sad!! Well, this was a nice finish. You know, I never really thought about time travel like that, but it really does make sense. I'm still a bit confused, however: how does anyone ever change time with a time turner? Is it possible? Erg, my head hurts... Well, good job! Nice ending!!
Author's Response: I was rather proud of that line, teehee, so I\'m glad you liked it too. :D
As to the Time Travel thing, yes, it IS possible to change time in some circumstances. For example, in PoA, when Harry and Hermione saved Buckbeak. But in their case, when they were still in \'real time\' (ie, before they had traveled), their time traveling had technically already happened -- such as Harry\'s patronus rescusing the other Harry. But since Severus was still alive in the present, it simply wouldn\'t have been possible for him to kill himself in the past, because he would have never been able to travel in the first place.
Okay, I\'m going to shut up about Time Travel now, because I think I just made that even MORE confusing! XD Anyway, thank you for reading, and for leaving all those nice reviews!
Yay!!!!! This was incredible and is going right on my favorites list (and I'm picky)! What an interesting idea, and you're carrying it through well! At first I was a little confused as to why Snape was doing this, because wouldn't he realize he had an important role to play in Harry's life? And then I realized, oh, it's way back in 1980 and the Potters have just died! And it all made sense-- because of course Snape, torn with grief, would want to do something rash to make it all go away. This was really excellent, and I'm so excited to see the future chapters!
Author's Response: What a nice review, thanks so much! Yes, this is set right after the Potters have died, before Severus has really thought through the future clearly. Chapter two should be up soon! :D
Hmm... this is an intriguing start. Is "Lily" a shortening of "Laura"? I didn't get that at the beginning, because in his mind James calls her "Laura." I think he would have called her Lily instead. Well that was a tiny thing, but in general, this is good!
Author's Response: Hi! Well, this is James Potter II (Harry\'s son) grown-up. So Laura is his wife. :)
Yay! I'm a hopeless romantic who believes every single person on earth should get hooked up (okay, exaggerating a little), and a grin started spreading across my face when I felt the burgeoning love. Nice!
Oh...this is so good! Ah, Bellatrix. She's pretty messed up, isn't she? I liked how you mentioned "stare into his [Voldemort's] beautiful eyes" -- in the midst of all this sentiment we're reminded yes, Bellatrix is out of her mind. She's in love with the most evil person alive. You did such a good job with this, I started feeling sort of sorry for Bella and thinking it was cute she was romantic-- and then I was like, wait, what am I thinking, this is Bellatrix and Voldemort!! That's good writing. Nice! :)
Author's Response: Aw, what a nice review. Yes, Bellatrix is indeed out of her mind, and absolutely nuts. But she is also truly in love, and can we fault her for that? Love makes fools of us all, whether we are psycho or not. ;) Anywho, thank you again, your reviews always make me smile!
I love that you did a story around that quote-- it just about broke my heart when I read it in DH! To start, I love the storytelling-- you write action but it doesn't feel rushed or lacking of anything; every idea moves smoothly into the next, and the emotions are portrayed realistically. I like the dream sequence in the very beginning; it's an interesting lead-in and I can imagine having the same sorts of nightmares if I were a little Hogwarts First Year! Charlotte is a very believable OC, especially when she's questioning if it was wise to decide to be a witch and not just a "normal" person. You just feel for her so deeply; I got the same sick turn in my stomach as Charlotte did when she realizes her wand's upstairs and she's wondering if "[the older students] knew something she didn't." You really show, instead of the heroics and the grandeur of the battle, a little girl's reality, of fright and uncertainty and no assurance of success (especially when she sees Harry Potter, the so-called saviour, is only a "scrawny teenager"!). There's no order, she doesn't know what's going on and just wants to return to the known, to the safety, to the warmth of her home and family. It just seemed so unfair again when she falls through the "wall" and finds herself far away-- and then to find her way back in only to see that the fighting is well underway is terrible. The whole time I was on edge and just as scared (okay, maybe not that scared) as Charlotte. The appearance of Ginny is a bit reassuring until she offers to bring Charlotte inside, which is exactly what she doesn't want, leaving the reader still on-edge and unsure about Charlotte's fate. Gorgeously done; right on my Favorites! (I'm so glad you didn't kill off Charlotte-- I think I would have broken down in tears!)
Hey, this was good! Unrequited love--or unfulfilled, I should say--is sad. But I liked this plot line. My favourite lines: Whatever Draco wants Draco gets; and then the last line too. :) The only thing that got me was the brief switch to first person somewhere near the end. If it's in Pansy's point of view, maybe make it stand out as hers, so that it's clearer. Good job!
Author's Response: Wow. I didn\'t even notice that til now. Thanks for pointinmg it out. And thanks even more for the review!
Author's Response: Wow. I didn\'t even notice that til now. Thanks for pointinmg it out. And thanks even more for the review!
Hannah! Oh dear, this was so terribly sad! Few things are so terrible as unrequited love. But you did a wonderful job in telling this. Well-written; simple, but eloquent. Well done. My favourite line: 'But there was nothing to say because for the first time Albus had shown himself, how he truly was and he didn’t know how to fix that.' So sad!
Author's Response: thank you so much for the review - it really cheered me up! I\'m pleased you thought this was a good fic, I was little nervous about it because romance doesn\'t tend to be my genre so to hear that it worked is great!
More, por favor! (Rhymes!) Your summary is SO interesting--I really want to see this story!
Author's Response: I\'m still working on the first chapter. I just really want it to shine.
Hey Hannah!
This was great! Everyone is so in character, but somehow grown-up too; you did a perfect job of keeping the same people but making them a few decades older. Ron is funny just by being Ron, which is always the best (and no "Bloody Hell!"s either! Thank God!).I like how Hermione tells Ron he can't as a motivator-- if felt very Ron-ish to me. When I read it I was like, what, why is Hermione being mean and doubtful? And then I got it and I smiled. You thought of every little component--the computer, making timetables-- and it really shows how hard the simplest (not for me!) Muggle activity is for wizards and especially Ron. And then the last line is so cute and clever!
This was a great story and very entertaining. This reminds me of how I learned to drive! My parents were gripping the arm rests and screaming the whole time, and there was quite a lot of swearing on both ends. ; )
YAY! Third review!!! Okay, Susan, you probably already know how much I adore you and what you write, but let me say again--you're a talent! This is just so beautiful. I know I don't a get a vote, but if I did you'd win in the Challenge. :)
~Rhi
Author's Response: And you, my friend are a wonderful Beta reader (who knew punctuation was so complicated!). It would not be nearly as good without you!