06/06/05
~This adorable banner was made by my dear friend Sekhmet!
Hear ye! Hear ye!
This is your conscience talking. Also your sense of humour, your sense of pride, and your intuition, and we all say you should read The Harry Potter Literary Storm!
*M_O_M enters*
Me? Have anything to do with your conscience, sense of humour, sense of pride and intuition telling you to read the humour story I’m proudest of? I don’t know what you’re talking about. But, you know, they are pretty important aspects of you, so for the sake of them, I’d say why not try it? After all, if your conscience, sense of humour, sense of pride and intuition abandon you in protest of you not reading Happy’s story, it’ll be far worse than (almost) anything that could happen as a result of you reading it. Right?
Right?
Anyway, my name’s Georgia, I’ve recently fallen in love with the Prewett family, I have a long term humour story which you may have noticed I’m attempting to promote–
I mean, which your conscience, sense of humour, sense of pride and intuition think you should read, of course-
And I like to hide behind supposedly witty remarks and a bent sense of logic.
To avoid digging myself into a deeper hole, I’d like to dive in and tell you about my stories.
Prewett'd: Wedding Tears, Funeral Tears
This is my entry to the third run of the Gauntlet. It's from Gideon's perspective (thus the 'Prewett'd' bit), and is the darkest piece of writing I think I've ever put together. I'm really, really proud of this story, and really hope people read it - although it was for the Gauntlet, this is now a part of the lifetime of (my version of) the Prewetts.
The Harry Potter Literary Storm
It’s an ongoing humour fiction starring an OC called Happy O’Brien, who, in this alternate universe, is responsible for the creation of Harry Potter. He and his assistant Jackie van de Geissen and crack team of anonymous authors have put together the Harry Potter books in a very different way to what you’re used to.
The rumours are true, the first drafts are too, and this story had been nominated thrice for best humour fiction.
THAT’S RIGHT, NOMINATED THRICE FOR BEST HUMOUR FICTION; can you believe it? *Will never get over the flattery*
and the lovely Schmergo put in nomination for best OC too, with Happy.
*Pats Happy on the head*
Chapter Four, Part Two promotional banner:
Chapter Six promotional banner:
Chapter Seven, Part Two and Three promotional banner:
Jackie and Barry side-kicks banner (Barry's a dude from my Dean's Corner series of artpad movies)
Prewett’d : Gucky and the Fork Tree
It’s a one shot of pretty good length, about Gideon, Fabian and Molly as children, submitted for the One Shot Challenge: Muggle Artifacts. It’s the first story I’ve written about the Prewetts, and certainly not the last.
… And he Turned Around Snobbily and Walked Away
Another one-shot, inspired by the quote from Prisoner of Azkaban, when Snape accuses James of strutting. Good for a grin or two, or so I’ve been told.
Ginny's Midnight Drama
One-shot; basically a gag in story form. It was my first submitted story, and will always be special. Good, special ficlet. *Pats*
The Letter-Opener
Definitely more serious, and certainly not a humour story. But it came third in the One-Shot Challenge: Borgin and Burke's. Just thought you should know.
NOTE: INCLUDES CHARACTERISATION OF YOUNG VOLDEMORT
Well, it’s a big thing for me. I find Tom Riddle difficult to write, at any age.
~Thank you to joanna!
The Acromantula and its Ability to Consume the Most Repulsive Beasts on This Earth
This is a fun story about Draco Malfoy being cocky ^^
Nothing for Chrismas
Chaptered, and complete. It's light and fluffy and about the Weasleys. I like it more now, because it mentions Gideon and Fabian Prewett, and even Morticia, an OC of mine.
Oh, and that was nominated (by the fantastically wonderful HermyRox12) for the Quicksilver Quills best General Fiction award.
T'was but a Puddle
It's a poem, and I think it's fun. ^^
And this was nominated for Best Poem. Thank you, HermyRox12!
COMING SOON
The last part of chapter seven of The Harry Potter Literary Storm. The very last. Eep!
A ballad about a gnome called Gary the Green
And most likely, plenty more Prewetty stuff.
Somehow, I doubt anyone will read this. Ever. But if you did, well done, congratulations, thank you, and I’m sure you’ll enjoy my stories a lot more. So please, scroll down a bit and read about them all over again. Maybe even read the things themselves! *Noting pointlessness of having just written all of this*
Anyway, a nice day to all, and to all a nice day!
~MOM
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The Dark Lord's Blog by Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: What does Lord Voldemort do in his spare time? Well, that's an excellent question. Who would have known that the Dark Lord has a blog? (He also has a loyal following of readers, most of whom are Death Eaters and who post their comments.) Voldemort dispenses advice on everything from murder methods to germ protection to Power Rangers to shoes, and gives an account of the life of an evil overlord. But is he posting too much personal information online? And will Harry read it and find out more about the Dark Lord than Voldemort ever intended? Read and see.
WARNING: Extremely OOC behaviour from almost all.
RUNNER-UP in the 2007 Quicksilver Quills Awards for Best Humour fic! Also nominated like 21 times, because apparently my readers are as insane as I am!
Date: 09/30/06 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Don't Try This At Home
Alright, first I must say that I am appalled at the fact that you didn't tell me that this story was up. For shame! What was I meant to do? Actually look? Or notice the mentions of it in your posts on the forums? Or even ask?
Tut tut.
Anyway, I'd just like to say, 'ha ^^'. This story is so very... you. In a good way! Well done, Schmergo!
Author's Response: Hmmm... so this story is so very \'me?\' Does that mean that I\'m an incredibly evil inhumanoid thing that wants to kill Harry Potter? That\'s interesting....
-- Schmergo.
Are you saying that\'s a compliment or an insult?
--Voldemort
Author's Response: Oh yeah... and in the next entry, I\'m putting in a brief mention of Pyrites, who ceased to exist. I didn\'t steal this from you, just so you know...
And why does this thingy make a slash symbol (/) every time I try to make an apostrophe? That\'s kind of annoying me...
Date: 10/05/06 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: A Selected List of Imbeciles
Hola.
I really like this chapter! I love how Ron's, like, number three on Voldemort's 'To Die' list, and Hermione's number six. And then, although he's already dead, Dumbledore's, like, number ten. Ha.
And I giggled at all mentions of Voldemort's insecurities, like how he can't sing as well as Josh Groban, has no hair and no lips.
And last but not least, Wh00t for passing mentions of Pyrites! That guy doesn't get nearly enough credit. Huzzah ^^
Author's Response: Thank you! Yes, I love Josh Groban\'s voice, and since Voldemort\'s described as having a \'high, clear voice,\' I had this funny image of him being jealous of Josh Groban\'s voice.
Yeah, you probably remember how excited I was when I read about Pyrites in your story. I love that guy.
Author's Response: Eeep, I meant \'high, cold.\' High and clear sounds like a description of the voices in the London Boys\' Choir.
One Minute by Rachael DuBois
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Time is precious when fighting deadly curses. Missing moment from HBP with Snape and Katie Bell.
Date: 10/04/06 Title: Chapter 1: One Minute
O_O I love it.
Somehow, this story is so strong it really pulled me into it, not a common thing. And somehow, you managed the building of intensity with a flair that made it just work, so the last line (the time) completely makes a simple, but perfect ending.
There's a truly amazing style to your writing in this story. So yeah - I love it.
Reminiscent Rain by EtherealElation
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary:
One foot.
One foot in front of the other.
One foot in front of the other, step-by-step, walking –
So careful not to tread upon the crumbling dust and bones that is all that is left of –
Them.
Date: 10/15/06 Title: Chapter 1: Amori
Hey! Hey, you wrote this!
I could have sworn I already reviewed. But thankfully I didn't because obviously I would have been wrong, huh?
...
Anyway, I couldn't resist checking out your bio. This is a really beautiful story - the poetry makes the whole thing flow so naturally, I don't even know how to describe it. Like... on the one hand, I could see everything happening, but on the other hand, with the constant, meaningful references to 'them', I found myself also imagining what had come before, which made the whole thing so much more tragic.
It was made even more valuable by realistic it was; Hermione obviously has these overpowering emotions, but at the same time you can see that she'll be alright. You've written her strength, especially, with an amazing flair, so not only does the situation and emotions get communicated, but her character comes through as well.
So yeah, overall I think this is a particularly lovely piece. Just brilliant.
Author's Response: Well, for not knowing how to describe it, I must say, you did a most spectacular job of it! I must thankyou, and eat my reviewer\'s choclolate, and then go to bed... 1:35 AM is not a sane hour, I tell you. Although that\'s always when my creative juices start flowing, and then I stay up till 3 writing - and I have to go to church tomorrow!
I need a time turner. That way, I could write, and then, I could go back in time and sleep in the guest bed, or something. Sounds good to me. Anyhow - thanks for the wonderful review!
~Juli
An Uplifting Adventure by Gmariam
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: While shopping for Christmas gifts during their final year, Fred and George decide to visit the Muggle shopping centre, and drag new prefects Ron and Hermione along for the ride. After experiencing the fascinating world of Muggle clothing, music, and magazines, they take the lift up to the top level, a ride that leaves the Weasley brothers pale and nervous. When they return to the lift for the journey back down, Fred and George Apparate back to Diagon Alley instead, leaving Ron and Hermione to face the consequences alone when they return to the Leaky Cauldron.
This story was written for the One-Shot Challenge: Muggle Artifacts by Gmariam of Ravenclaw and received Third Place.
Date: 10/18/06 Title: Chapter 1: An Uplifting Adventure
Ooh - I've been waiting for this to come up ever since you mentioned it on the forums! And can I just say - Yay! Absolutely hilarious.
I love the way you characterised just about everyone in this story, and I honestly can't remember Mrs. Weasley being any scarier. Really. And the elevator incident was just priceless. I especially liked this line:
To his surprise she took his hand once more, called the twins a rather rude name, and led him toward the exit.
It's short and simple, but somehow just... really funny! I'm nervous about posting my entry now...
Again, this is a brilliant story. Good luck!
Author's Response: Hi! Thanks so much for the great review! I am so glad you stopped to read this story and I am thrilled you enjoyed it. I am really glad you liked the characterizations, for some reason I thought readers might find some of the characters a bit \"off\" and I\'m still worried someone will zing me for it. Ah well, it was fun! Please don\'t be nervous about posting your own entry, I can\'t wait to read more stories in this challenge! Good luck with it, and thanks again for the great review! ~Gina :)
Date: 10/18/06 Title: Chapter 1: An Uplifting Adventure
*Sigh* And sorry for the double-review, but can you believe I only just got the title.
*Moron*
Author's Response: Hi again! I\'m glad you got it, did you like it? Funny story there - my original title was \"Mall Rats.\" :) LOL! But then I realized \"mall\" wasn\'t a big word in Britain so I had to go back and change \"mall\" to \"shopping centre\" and there went that title. I also had to change \"elevator\" to \"lift\" and hence the new title, which I think is a bit silly, but so was their trip to the mall - I mean shopping centre. ;) Thanks again for the review!! ~Gina :)
A Black Destiny by Sly Severus
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: The time has come. Bellatrix is finally being initiated into the Death Eaters. But was it really what she wanted? Was she really meant to follow the Dark Lord?
Written by Sly Severus of Slytherin for the Gauntlet's 3rd run
Date: 11/11/06 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
^^ Alright, first I have to congratulate you for:
a) Finishing the Gauntlet
b) Not smashing the suggested word limit into tiny pieces and
c) Actually sticking to the prompts. *Personally bent most of them like Superman bends steel*
Your characterisation of Bella is really different to the one in my head. Also Rodolphus. But I love the softness you added to their characters. I'm not usually a nit-picker, but I saw this:
Panic ceased her. early on. I think you mean 'seized'.
Anyway, yeah. It's so interesting to see how people have taken their characters through the prompts - and this story is very nicely done. And I have to mention that you handled the characterisation of Voldemort really well too *almost forgot to mention that*.
Author's Response: Awww...thanks so much. I tried to follow the prompts as best as I could but I bent them in a few places too.
My characterisation of Bella is actually a bit harsher in this then in some of my other stories. I just can\'t see her as evil as the rest of you. She was way off to what I usually do with her when she killed Andromeda. I hated to do that but it seemed to fit. I still feel guilty about it though.
As for Rodolphus, I have been experimenting with a softer Rodolphus lately, but it isn\'t my real vision of him. I think of him as cold and cruel, which is how he is portrayed in most of my fics, so far. Although, I believe I am slowly starting to get used to the softer version of him, very slowly.
Glad you liked my Voldie, by the way. I\'m getting more comfortable with him now but he was a stuggle when I starrted out. :D
And, I did indeed mean seized. That\'s an interesting typo. I\'ll go search for it. Thanks for pointing it out! :D
Trust by blackhairedweasley
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: Neville is tired of being considered worthless. He's tired of being the one without respect. But respect comes with a price.
One of the 2nd place winners for the Gauntlet's 3rd run.
Date: 11/11/06 Title: Chapter 1: The Spy
^^ Hola.
I think the initial premise of this story is divine - the timing, along with the Order's plan. Look, I'm not usually nit-picky, but something's come over me today. Thus, I have this:
To think, he, Neville Longbottom, the song of Frank and Alice Longbottom, would have a dark mark on his arm that night.
I’m pretty sure ‘song’ is meant to be ‘son’. And Dark Mark is capitalised. O_O Just to me irritatingly thorough.
But yeah - I thing you're characterising everyone really well - Neville and Harry, as well as the others when they come. I know there's not much time for a lot of dialogue, but I think you did a brilliant job with it anyway.
*Hangs around to find out what happens next*
Author's Response:
Author's Response: Oh, thank you for pointing that out! Yeah, only so much gets by when your beta\'s \'spell check\'. I decided to leave \"dark mark\" without capitalization because I was using it in the same way as \"A beetle on his arm,\" or \"A bracelet on his wrist.\" But that\'s debatable, anyways.
I\'m really happy with what you said about the characters. If more dialogue is needed, then don\'t worry - the next chapter has much more \"dialogue\" seeing as I\'m actually including the humor challenge.
Thanks for the review!
- Jacie the Cat
Draco, The Babysitter by mgle_teacher
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: After a potion goes awry, Draco finds himself as the newly appointed babysitter of one Hermione Granger, age: 4. As if that wasn't humiliating enough, his wand is confiscated by Potter and he is forced to do everything the dreaded Muggle way.
Note to my readers: This story has been on hiatus forever due to a variety of factors. I do hope to finish it some day, but don't hold your breath. Also, this is NOT a Dramione nor will I change it to be one. Lastly, I am in the process of rewriting this story so bear with me.
Date: 12/21/06 Title: Chapter 1: Exploding Cauldrons
I have to admit that, at first, I was reluctant to read this story. But a lack of anything to do and a little curiosity made me do it, and now I’m very glad ^^
I think it’s really amazing how you managed to put these characters into such a crazy situation, kept them true to everything we know about them, AND made the story fit into the ‘funny’ category, as opposed to the one full of insane randomness. Really, I’m so impressed it’s almost funny.
Like I said, it stood out very strongly how everyone was in character. Draco is extremely unimpressed with his situation. He’s in Order headquarters, and he has an agreement with them – he’s even working with them. And yet, he’s still Draco, and he’s still Draco at this time in his life. Harry’s agreed to a truce with Draco, and all this has happened – yet, he’s still Harry. Whoa!
The only thing I’d question is little Hermione’s language. I mean, I’m obviously not an expert but I’ve spent a lot of time around five year old’s, some of whom have read the Harry Potter books themselves.
But other than that, this is a really funny story, the characters seem shockingly accurate to me, and the light side of the situation is just hilarious against a very dark backdrop.
Author's Response: Awwww *hugs*
Thank you so much for your review MoM!
I\'m so happy you decided to read my story due to your curiosity.
I\'m really trying to keep all the characters true to their nature, and at the same time trying out my hand at humor. The fact that you\'ve just confirmed that for me has made my day in more than one way. *hugs again*
I must admit you did call me on Hermione\'s language. I had a job at a day care many summers ago - and their language skills varied greatly in my mind. I\'m trying to find that perfect mix for little Hermione. She will become more vocal as the story progresses.
Thanks for your splendid review *huggles*
Ritta
In the Pursuit of Power by Gonz
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: When she was fired from the Ministry Dolores Umbridge lost her well earned power. Determined to regain what she has lost, Dolores makes a decision that will change her life forever. Journey with Dolores as she faces the trials and tribulations in her new life as a Death Eater.
Written for the Gauntlet Third Run by Gonz of Hufflepuff House.
Date: 11/26/06 Title: Chapter 1: One-shot
Wow - there really is something very hard hitting about this story... I think it has something to do with how your Umbridge just never seems to feel remorse. She feels no pity, for anyone really, not to mention anything. It's like some kind of blindness - even Fudge is more of a tool to her than a person.
A coldness has stayed with me after reading this story. You took a really unique angle on it all, and conquered every challenge differently, I think, to most others. Well done, and good luck!
:-The Order of the Ravenclaw House Elves-:
Author's Response: The Turnips have House Elves, nevermind I don\'t think I want to know.
My impression of Umbridge is that she has never let herself care about anyone before. She\'ll help someone if its in her interest, but care, no. Umbridge really reminds me of Count Dooku in the novelization of the third moive where he is thinking about how everyone is either an assest or a threat. There is no third group. Umbridge thinks of Fudge as an assent nothing more. In that way of thinking there is no room for friendship. Its sad that she chooses to live that way, but that is how I see her character.
I glad you felt like mine was different, becuase I felt like I didn\'t really stretch the prompts at all.
Thanks so much for reviewing and good luck to you to.
Homework Excuses by bajab
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Remus Lupin is sneaking out at night, and the other Marauders want to know what he is up to, so what do they do? Follow him of course. An Early Marauder's era fic
Date: 12/21/06 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
Aww ^^
To me, this is a very cute story, and the punch line is just priceless. I don’t know what it is, but there’s a certain aspect which makes it all that much funnier, if you know what I mean. It’s in your style, like in the very last line when Lupin’s tone is described as ‘forlorn’. Things like that make the story and the style of humour so much richer.
I also really enjoyed the interaction between James and Sirius – it’s not easy to write them (for me at least) having such a relaxed, chummy relationship, but you did, and particularly well too. Just to a certain level, they (and Peter, for that matter) picked on each other, but nothing was over the top and all of it matched everything we know about them in canon to the tiniest detail.
Basically, I think this was a nice idea, and was very well written. The only complaint I have is some of the bits about Peter but really, that’s only because I’m in denial about his character and how he behaves.
Just lovely! Well done!
Author's Response: Peter was the hardest to write.
Voldemort is Coming to Town by Sly Severus
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: What should a small wizarding community do when they know that Voldemort is coming to town?
This is an entry for the Winter Tales Contest, A Christmas Carol: Parody, by Sly Severus of Slytherin.
Date: 12/14/06 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
^^ I really like this. It's like... a really funny cross between making light of Voldemort and encreepenating the original carol. I did miss the regular rhyme scheme though - that would have been cool.
Author's Response: I\'m glad you liked it and thanks for the review. :D
I always enjoying making fun of Voldie. I liked the original rhyme scheme too, but I\'m just not much of a poet. I knew if I didn\'t dump the rhyming idea that I would never finish. :)
Anyway, thanks again for the review.
The First Harry Potter by dragonwings
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: A fun, absolutely pointless parody involving Harry and some shepherds, three kings, Mary, Joseph, and a lot of sheep.
This is dragonwings writing in the Winter Challenge for... GRYFFINDOR!
Date: 12/15/06 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
Oh, my goodness. I love this rendition so much! It's just brilliant, and I love how you use those hilarious throw-away phrases, like calling Wormtail a weird little man.
AND I'm really glad you kept most of the rhyme scheme, and the rhythm was just perfect. I actually sung it to hear what it sounded like, and it was great (except for when I had to stop from laughing).
Well done, and really really really good luck with the challenge!
... and I realised I technically really shouldn't be saying that, being a 'Claw and all...
Author's Response: Haha thanks!!! I\'m not a very good poet so it\'s nice to know that I\'m not a complete failure at this!
Voldy's Deathpants by Deathpants, Mind_Over_Matter, wendelin the wierd, cmwinters, Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: The Order of the Phoenix and the Death Eaters are locked in battle over a highly important magical artifact known to most as Voldy's Deathpants, in bold letters like that. However, they go about battle in a, er, highly unusual way-- a Quidditch match!
Probably the silliest thing that's ever appeared on this site, featuring highly OOC behaviour.
Deathpants is a team of writers consisting of Mind_Over_Matter, cmwinters, wendelin the wierd, and Schmerg_The_Impaler. Our story was written in Round Robin format. This (and our deranged minds) explains its randomness. Enjoy!
The insanity of the Deathpants has gotten to the mods! This ridiculous story WON the 2008 Quicksilver Quill Award for Best Humour Story!
Date: 09/28/09 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1 and Only
Wow... I'd forgotten how much fun this story was. Somehow. Heh.
More importantly though - I want to say to whoever reads this, I'm sorry for my neglect for the past... ages. Especially to Shmergo. I've been very flipped about for a long time now, but I appreciate everyone's reviews so much - and the friends I made here, I still love you!