I liked how you started with the ending, so to speak, making Ginny’s memories all the sadder, as we know what will happen. “She wanted to stop there, to make up her own happy ending.” That line is so sweet, so touching, I really love it.

I do have one question - why wasn’t Ginny fighting too? I doesn’t really seem like her, to stay home and wait for news, I would have thought she would be out on the battlefield, helping Harry, doing what she believed in.

“Was it selfish for her to feel pain? Was it wrong for her to cry for her own grief when the world was rejoicing?” This reminded me of ‘I Never Knew You’, of how the character is presented with an impossible battle of emotions, how unfair it is for them. It makes very good reading though!

This was a really moving read, Ginny’s emotions were especially well done. Once again (again!), a great last line, a wonderful way to end it. Well done.

Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you liked it! I like that line too! And no, I don\'t have the slightest clue why Ginny wasn\'t fighting. I never actually thought about it. And yes, it probably is similar to INKY. I have quite a few self-cliches. Thanks so much for reviewing!

I really like all of the subtle explanations of how things are different in Japan, like the mattress on the floor and the description of the city. You point them out without being obvious, which is really good.

"Love comes in many different forms and shapes, but at the end, it’s all the same. It is just love.”" That is such a wonderful line! My favourite so far! Ooh - what did the old woman at the shop say?! I can't imagine Sirius not wanting to know - and I want to know too!

Gosh - Kasumi sure is wise - "It’s a reminder for all of us that life is short, yet it’s beautiful." Those are some really great lines which definitely have an impact.

"long wide pants" That would be trousers in England - but I'm not sure what in Japan! From Sirius' point of view it would be trousers anyway.

Gosh! What a way to end a chapter! I'm off to find out what happens now!!

Author's Response: I\'v always had a fascination for the Japanese culture, so writing this fic was a real treat. It was such a great writing excersice becuase I had to describe it, I couldn\'t ignore it like I do in \"Ariel\", I mean they\'re in Hogwarts, I don\'t need to describe it everyone knows how it looks like, but here I didn\'t have other choice and it was a good excersize. I totally forgot to put what the woman said, she said \"Sexy Foreigner\" I smacked myself for forgetting that. Sorry about the pants thing, I keep forgeting that in england they\'re called trousers not pants, silly me. Thanks for the review!

I felt so, so sorry for Snape at the beginning, when he has all these nice thoughts of escaping his home, to somewhere better, nicer - and then all his dreams are thwarted by two inconsiderate boys. The part about Snape freezing himself was a great effect, well in character and in keeping with what we know in canon. A really good start to the chapter, really visual and emotional.

I do have one gripe about a particular sentence; “The stupid Weasley prat had hurt her by snogging another Gryffindor wench right in front of her, after making her think he liked her. “ I have to say, I’m not sure Snape would word it quite like that. It sounds more like something Ginny might say in a fit of anger (obviously, not if it was about her brother, but if she was explaining the situation to someone else, about someone else. If you get that - sorry, it’s not very clear!) than Snape, a grown man. It sounds very personal, something that Snape hasn’t really admitted to himself yet that he would feel that strongly. Perhaps he might just say, ‘That idiot Weasley had hurt her by leading her on, then showing affections for someone else in front of her,’ or something. But I’m not sure he would say ‘prat’ most of all.

I loved the bit afterwards, where Snape tries to deal with his feelings by completely ignoring them. “He would not let a little know-it-all Gryffindor destroy the defenses he had spent so much time building.” I think that is such a great line, really well in character for Snape, plus a great metaphor at the end, really effective.

“I have two actually; the first is the fall of the Dark wizard Crean what is the date of that event? And the second is why do you have to be so mean?” I laughed out loud at that! I’m not too sure whether Hermione would actually say that, but it did make me giggle. Her next bit, about getting a glimpse of his human side, only for it to turn so drastically, was well done though, and brought it back to canon again! The last line made me laugh out loud as well! A great way to end the chapter! Well done!

Author's Response: Wow! Thank you! I think that review was longer then the chapter! *giggles* I understand what you are saying about Snape, I will keep that in mind. Thank you for reading and reviewing!

This is a really well written piece, I really enjoyed reading it! I thought the last stanza with the glass slipper semi-metaphors (or however you would describe it - I'm not sure!) were really well done in particular. Also the prince and pauper references were very good - in-keeping with both canon and the poem! I don't know much about poetry, and I don't usually read it, but I thought that this was amazing! I can't wait to see more of your writing - poetry or otherwise! (Also, I would like to hear the tune if possible!)

Author's Response: Wow-you made my day!!! I have a friend with an MP3 player who said she\'d be willing to record it. I\'ll contact you and give you the info. Thanks- Daisy

Nice start to what looks like a promising fic. The first few paragraphs were especially emotional, recounting the losses that had taken place. One line that I found very prominent out of it all was, "They did not know of the horrible murderers roaming their town until they were victims themselves." which was very touching, just imagining it.

There were a few grammatical errors in there that I noticed, but nothing big. "It had been only four years since they had left Hogwarts, but it had felt like forever." I'd delete the 'had' in 'but it had felt like forever', as the sentence flows smoother without it, and it isn't really necessary.
"The graveyard that the trio was walking in happened to be part of the newly erected Potter Manor." I think that the 'the trio was walking' should be 'the trio were walking', as 'trio' is a plural, and 'was' is the singular.
"“Please, Harry, you know exactly why you’re being called I need help with the kids ”" The second part of this sentence is a bit too long, Ginny would probably need to take a breath somewhere! Either "...you know exactly why you're being called! I need help with the kids," or "...you know exactly why you're being called - I need help with the kids!" would work, as long as there is some sort of punctuation there to break it up.

In my opinion, I think Hermione would be stronger when coping with her parents deaths than that. Although she would still be upset long after, I don't think she would cry that much in public, probably just force it to the back of her mind and only let it out when she was alone. However, that is only my opinion, and pulled off your own opinions well in this.

You did a really good job of characterizing Ron when Hermione was taken, as obviously he's go through a lot of confliction emotions and actions. My favourite line was, "His body was debating whether to stay frozen as it was or go jump in the freezing lake behind the mansion." which I thought was brilliant! I think maybe you could evolve on Harry's emotions, as she was his best friend too, and I think he'd show more than that, but his reasoning to be strong for Ron was well done, and showed why he might not have. There was some great imagery when Hermione was taken, I felt so sorry for her - and Ron!

Overall a great start, good luck with the rest of this fic, I'm looking forward to finding out what happens!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review. [/blushes at horrile grammar skills] Yes, I\'m terrible with grammar and it often happenes that a beta will miss something. I probably would have evolved Harry\'s emotions, but the main focus of it, was primly Hermione. I do agree though, that Harry probably would have been a bit more upset, had I truly inteneded to stick to it. (My last statement was confusing, I didn\'t quite know how to say it.) As for Hermione, I always pictured her as the one to blame herself. I figured she might blame herself for not being their when her parents were attacked, which would make the memory and despair burn stronger.

I love the topic of this, unrequited love and having to let go. Again, your great description pulls through here, especially at the Beech tree, I found. I also liked the consistent transition of ‘just a little longer’ which was really effective.

I have a few things I’m not sure about with this. I have to say, it’s unlikely that James would have been in love with Lily for all his years at Hogwarts. For instance, in his first few years, I doubt he was even that interested in girls. For another, I’m not sure Chloe would have described him as being ’in love’ with Lily, for two reasons; 1) she liked him herself, and so although it was obvious he liked Lily, I don’t think she’d have said it was ’love’ as that could just be a little too depressing. 2) They were only 16 at the time, and although it seems to us that it was love, as they later got married, at the time I don’t think 16 year olds would have described it as love.

One other gripe is how she was able to let go so easily after liking him so much for so long. Perhaps you could have had it how she felt so much better after her decision to let go, how it seemed a little easier even then, just after making it, rather than have it all suddenly better. However, I did love the description of it!

I really liked Chloe’s character, how she was able to do the right thing in The Three Broomsticks, even though she felt differently. I thought that was really strong of her. Also how she tried to be happy for Lily, was really nice. My favourite line has to be “And of everything, the lost memories were what hurt the most.” which was just beautiful!

Author's Response: Why thank you! I agree with most everything you said, I don\'t quite like this fic. I would do a more through response, but I\'m very tired. Just know it meant a lot to me!

What a lovely fic, Beth - but how sad! I can't wait to read the rest of the series - even if I know you're just going to kill them all off! I really liked Addicks' character, it was so nice how passionate he was about the dragons. I thought your description was great too, "Its snout protruded from its face and its lips were curled back to reveal gleaming, sharp fangs." I could really picture the dragon - though I'm not sure I want to!

I loved the little bit about Fred and George' dragon suits - I never thought about how that could offend/annoy dragon handlers! That was brilliant! "Charlie was sure if the dragon was being attacked, its talons would be enough to unnerve even You-Know-Who himself." What a great idea - they should really try that in book 7!

One thing is, at the beginning of the story Charlie says that he'll be going home for Thanksgiving, but Brits don't celebrate Thanksgiving - I don't even know when it is! So maybe you could change that to another holiday, like Christmas or Halloween?

The conversation between Charlie and Addicks was great, it really made me smile. The best line has to be, "“Anything unusual about this one?” Addicks replied wryly, “You mean apart from the fact that this is the biggest dragon ever to exist? Not much.” " That really made me giggle!

Oh my gosh - the ending! I mean, from the summary, I knew pretty much what was coming, but that hit me so hard. That he died before finding out if he'd stopped the man in black - did he? I hope so. It was such a touching story though, especially the way you ended it, with it all just going black.

Anyway, all that is left to say now is HAPPY BIRTHDAY BETH (for yesterday!)! And great fic!!

I liked how you went through time, the transition was very smooth with the familiar start of the paragraph with her age and an event - it was very effective. The constant comparisons with champagne also helps to connect everything well, so the reader does not feel confused - again, a nice use of familiarity.

What I really enjoyed reading in this is all the description, you have a wonderful use of not only describing how things are, but how Susan feels, which gave me a very clear picture of what's going on as well as helping me feel closer to the character. "The liquid is at first bitter on Susan’s tongue, but once she swallows, warmth spreads down her throat, to her stomach and then out to her fingertips and toes, until her entire body is wrapped in a soft blanket." I loved the association at the end of a soft blanket - it is something a child in particular would liken it too. The only thing I would slightly quibble about is for Susan to take more than one sip - I remember the first time I tasted alcohol I hated it, and so I would think it would take Susan a second sip to truly taste it. But then, everyone's different, and the single good feeling works well with the rest of the story.

I love your use of the senses (which I seem to be commenting on an awful lot these days, but everyone does it so well!), with "her heels clicking and clacking" for sound, the taste of champagne, the sight of Susan 'all grown up' at the party, the touch of warmth in her fingertips, the smell of the aroma around Hogwarts a little later on. I really liked this sentence in particular, "Cats, owls, rats, toads and just about every other animal imaginable screech, scratch, scream and scramble." The use of the lists and alliteration were wonderful, and so that sentence stuck in my mind.

Gosh - what a contrast in her 13 year old paragraph! The mention of a sensitive subject is done very well, although I think maybe you could have evolved on a few of those points, to make it seem a little more real - as suicide is a very drastic step.

I did like the little details you put in, such as the chess match against Eleanor and Susan's bitten nails - all these things help to make the story more real and add those finishing touches that make a story memorable. I particularly liked the nail part, actually, as it's like Malfoy to have pristine perfectness - and like a girl to be jealous of his nails!

I loved the ending, Susan's thoughts about being scared she wouldn't do it right, Malfoy showing his bully nature in a different form - and how after Susan got back her champagne feeling, he leaned in again - and of course, her final thought. It was lovely, a great finish to a truly great story. Well done!

Author's Response: Wow. I kept reading and coming back to this review, I didn\'t know how to respond to something so sweet! This is doing wonders for my ego. Thanks so much Kiara, darling, this is a treasure!

Another great chapter here, Schmergo! I'll just jump straight in as usual! I thought it was great how Ted told everyone - it shows how time has progressed since Remus had to deal with it, and after the war how there is less prejudice, and how brave and Gryffindorish it was of Ted.

Your parenthesis of "(which had been fixed up and redecorated)" made me giggle! That whole paragraph I thought was very well written, with some good dry humour in there.

Now: Emma. I don't think that Emma's mean - as I said before, she's one of my favourite characters in this - I just think she's ignorant. She doesn't understand what something as terrible as losing a parent is like - nor should she have to - she's had a really happy childhood, and just doesn't get it. She did what she felt was right - standing up for her friend - just not in the right way. (I did think her comment was very quick-witted though) So yeah - I think with Emma it's ignorance rather than meanness - she has Ron's earlier emotional depth rather than Hermione's, and the quick tongue of the Weasleys - not thinking before she speaks. That's the impression I get, anyway.

I thought it was sweet of Jordan to think of Ted wanting company - sweet of all of them to think that and to be brave enough to go with him - it shows what good and close friends they all are.

I found the scene with the teachers talking about The Overseers very interesting. Harry I thought was very well in character, and I liked Hermione's cold replies, and how you described their voices as "emotionless" by the end of their conversation. However, I'm not sure I can see Hermione rising to the bait against Zambini being prejudiced against Muggleborns - we've always seen her as stopping Ron retorting verbally or physically, never rising to it herself. I did like the dialogue there a lot though, and the arguments they both put forward.

It made me smile to see all the students wishing Ted luck as he went to the Shrieking Shack - especially Tyrone! I really like Tyrone - hope to see more of him in future chapters! I absolutely adored the line "the butterflies in his stomach were mutating into pterodactyls." I thought that was wonderful! My favourite line in the chapter, nice job.

Jordan's invisible comment made me chuckle as well! I have to say again how much I like the humour you put in here, Schmergo, it's all really well done - and, importantly, not overdone.

I like how you adapted Truth or Dare to the wizarding world - very well thought out, a thing that far too often isn't. I also liked the description of Emma "casually kicking off her shoes and taking off her jacket." It's little details like that that make this story so good. Also, wonderful description of Ted's transformation.

And how adorable that Ted was jealous of Ivy going to Jordan for protection! *giggles* And Ivy's first kiss from Ted was when he was a wolf! As even though he thought of it as a hug, it was so a kiss! And on her hand too. How bless! *cooes* And it was very sweet how he noted her smell - like she knew his in the last chapter. Great parallel.

The Emma/Tyrone interaction was just heart! I'm sorry, but that is definitely my OTP for this story! I thought it was lovely how Emma was noticing all the little details about Tyrone, like his posture and how it was "unsettling" not to have him talk to her and hit on her - and we all know "unsettling" means she misses it! =p Oof, frosty ending - I wonder what Tyrone was hoping Emma meant when she thanked him though... And I have to comment on how cute it is that they call each other by their last names - remind anyone of any other couple we know?!

The end was just chilling! It's definitely left me on tenterhooks for the next chapter! Again, wonderfully written - you're doing a brilliant job on this fic, I can't wait to read the rest!

Author's Response: Oh, thank you! And I\'m so glad you see Emma the same way I do... she has a LOT of Ron\'s traits; she\'s really not very emotionally mature and she can be a bit tactless and rough around the edges. But she means well. Yeah, I\'m not sure Hermione would stand up to Zabini like that, but I kind of wanted to find an excuse to get Zabini to rant about how he wouldn\'t join the Overseers... I\'m glad you like Tyrone, because he becomes a pretty important character... and by the third book in the trilogy, he\'s one of the major ones, so I\'m glad you don\'t find him annoying. Haha, the last name thing... I never thought of that! Hmm, Tyrone kind of IS James... but more attractive. ^_^

Yay for a new chapter! And you can imagine how much I squeed at all the Emma/Tyroneness in here! =D But: to the chapter! Seeing as it's you, Schmergo, I'll overlook the fact that there was an annual Valentines Ball (that we've never heard about before), as well as the fact that you wrote it very well and without any clichés or cringe-worthy moments - or, thank God, that it was a Masquerade Ball! =p You know that I'm only teasing, but in seriousness you did manage to write what can be clichéd extremely well, so you completely forget the fact that it could be, and that it's just another chapter of a great fic. So well done for that.

Again what I loved here was how you kept the characters all true to their age, the blushing, the interaction - it was all very well done. "Emma’s jaw threatened to become friendly with the floor." I loved that line there - brilliant way of making a saying original and humorous! (I also loved how Emma specifically remembered that Antonia went out with Tyrone!) Haley's little speech there I thought was very cute and very realistic of a teenage girl - that's the sort of thing I do all the time!

The Ted/Ivy interaction in this chapter was sweet - I did feel sorry for her when Ted announced that he'd been asked already! Bless them both, being nervous! Young love! *gigglesnorts*

I also loved Haley and Emma's prank - I wonder what happened when she got it?! And Tyrone is undoubtedly cool - I love his nonchalance on what for most teens is one of the scariest most unthinkable escapades ever: asking someone out - and getting turned down! I thought his reasoning was very sweet though. He's definitely becoming one of my favourite characters.

I loved the little paragraph on last year's Ball, and how they again acted as being that year younger they would - all the larking around, sort of making fun of the fact that they wanted to be there, as they would do, and avoiding the more advanced emotional issue of a dance. (You know, of course, that I especially hearted the mention of Emma and Tyrone's spontaneous slow dance tap number!) Also that two ominous lines at the end - nicely reminding us that it isn't all sweetness and light...

Hmm, I'm not so sure that Ron would make lightness of death - I can see how he might be a bit oblivious, like he was at the mention of Parvati, whereas Harry noticed, and I'd agree in that Ron might not even be able to forgive Krum completely in death - but I really don't think Ron is as callous as that. He knows what it's like to have the awfulness of losing someone, he's seen what it's done to his best friend, and he's obviously matured a lot - I don't think he'd do that, to be honest. However I did like the trio interaction here a lot.

"Beauty is 50% natural and 50% painful" - oh, too true! *giggles* I also like the description of Isadora as Tyrone's catalogue ordered "accessory" - again, great creativity and humour! I really like all the little jibes between Emma and Tyrone - trying to disguise their real feelings! ;-p I really liked the description of the kids, and how it showed all their different personalities and their general age - like how Haley was crazy, Jordan was awkward, Ted's voice cracked and he and Ivy were nervous - it all made it very real.

I'm sure you'll know that I absolutely adored one of the last bits which was more centred on Emma, her feelings and how she reacted to everything - like hoping McGonagall was talking to one of her cousins, how she was aware of their shoes' noise in the silence - just little things like that I thought were extremely well described. "they passed a giant plate-glass window that seemed to be overlording as much of the wall space as possible." That I thought was perhaps one of the best pieces of description in this chapter, a wonderful line.

The little bits of Emma/Tyrone here were absolutely lovely, like how his elbow fit on her shoulder, and how she noted that it was softer than her friends - how it fit - and how he grabbed her wrist - oh, he cares! It shows he cares by how much he tries to prove he doesn't care.

I also really loved how they both reacted under pressure - how Tyrone reacted humanly, not calm and collected as usual, and how Emma kept up her Gryffindor front. I think it is so interesting how she said "I am a Gryffindor after all!" later - and I wonder, is it that Gryffindors were born brave, or being put in Gryffindor and feeling that they ought to be brave makes them brave? I loved how we really got to see a lot of Emma's personality in this chapter, how she couldn't resist showing off a little, how she noticed little things, and how also even though she was scared she refused to let it show. I loved how like her parents she is, but she's also completely herself too. She's always been my favourite character, but now even more than before.

*giggles* Whose son is Edwin? He seems a lot like the twins - but they'd be dreadfully disappointed to learn that their son was a prefect! "you could have heard a pin drop into a haystack and be able to locate it solely by following the sound" Another one of your fabulous expanding upon familiar sayings and making them firmly your own, whilst making the reader firmly laugh along! And the mention of the two girls who screamed when Ron's name is mentioned made me giggle too!

And awwww at the Tyrone/Emmaness that went on at the end! I literally squeed, it was just so, so cute! =D I loved how you kept them in character to what we already knew of them then too! I really thought their argument at the end was fantastic, as they're both such fiery characters (and of course it didn't make me smile because it reminded me of another couple who ended up screaming at each other after a Ball...obviously...!).

It was wonderful how that fight made Emma realise what she'd said and done was wrong - as it was just ignorance, not meanness - and how she was big enough to admit it and say sorry, which she really needed to do. My heart really went out to Tyrone there. And that last line: squeeee!

So, all in all, another wonderful chapter - I have no doubt that you'll be able to keep it up, I'm looking forward to the next one! (Also best of luck for the Post-Hogwarts QSQ - this naturally has my vote!)

Author's Response: Aw man, I always look forward to your reivews! You notice EVERYTHING! You\'re... like... Ted or something.

I\'m glad you like Tyrone, because his role in the stories gets bigger and bigger as the trilogy progresses. I like him, too, which is funny, because he\'s the type of person I usually can\'t stand at school. Ehh, but Tyrone\'s prettier and more magical, so maybe that\'s it.

I\'m REALLY relieved that you think I dealt with the romance well, because I wrote this two years ago and it was the first thing I ever wrote with any hint of romantic-ness whatsoever... though a lot of it\'s based on my experience and what was happening with my friends at the time of writing it.

Hmmm, you\'re right about Ron... again, this was written before DH came out, so he hadn\'t lost his own brother, and canon Ron as of HBP was a little less sensitive... but also, I hoped to get across that Ron is one to try to make himself seem tougher than he is, sees sentimentality as a weakness. (I was trying to draw a parallel between him and Emma in this chapter, I think.)

Edwin is *sob* Fred and Angelina\'s son, though that\'s not really possible in canon now. You will definitely see more of him...

Thanks so much for your QSQ vote and all of your delightfully detailed reviews. I hope you like the next one! (It has some VERY silly parts and some quite serious ones, much like this one, I guess. And it\'s the first chapter that gets into Jordan\'s head at all.)