So, thou hast resorted to alighting on Zoheb's author page? BWAHAHAHA...! Thou shalt never leave this place of nightmares eternal; my hypnotic powers COMPEL you to stay!
...
Still here? Good, I thought that you had left already. Thats what a sensible person would do anyway... which would mean that you are not a sensible person! Good for you! You sound like the sort of person I like to know.
Now, things can only get wierder from here, so just remember that all you have to do is press backspace and you'll be reasonably safe.
SCOREBOARD:Zoheb : 2, Mods: 3
Now then, *rubs hands together* on to the unnecessary personal information! Huzzar!
Name: Chuckles the Flying Skull... no, I'm just joking- or am I?
Date of Birth: 26-10-1992
Lunatic Rating: Not first class. Harmless and taciturn... but only when sleeping.
Personality: Not a very pleasant person. Very emotional and angers easily. Has strange moments when all logic seems to be thrown out the window. Proceed with caution.
Nationality: Bangladeshi. We used to be in first place for Most Corrrupt Country... but no longer. THEY STOLE IT FROM US: OUR PRECIOUS! *Gollum! Gollum!*
Religion: Islam. I like it, so there!
Physical description: What's it to you?
Favorite Activities: Being wierd and random; being taciturn and boring; being intelligent and sarcastic; playing Strategy Games; listening to good music; reading fantasy, crazy sci-fi, general science fiction, thrillers, comedies, comics; sketching; and (My favorite) staring into the distance, silent in my thoughts (Mostly involving apocalyptic battles with lots of lovely dragons slaughtering each other, with the odd horror of Hell thrown in here and there).
Favorite literature: The Lord of the Rings, the Silmarillion, the very inaccurately named Hitchhikers Trilogy, Angels and Demons, Harry Potter, Jurassic Park, Congo, Life of Pi, The Ruby in the Smoke, The Shadow in the North, The Tiger in the Well, The Tin Princess, To Kill a Mockingbird, the Old Kingdom Trilogy, Discworld, AVENGER, P. G. Wodehouse, JOB: A Comedy of Justice, The Wheel of Time series.
Favorite comic series: Asterix
Favorite bands: Opeth, Dream Theater, Tool, Liquid Tension, Porcupine Tree, Pink Floyd, Helloween, A Perfect Circle, In Flames, Queensryche. The full list is quite exhaustive.
Favorite poem: 'Oh freddled gruntbuggly’ (Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz)
Favorite qoutes:
"I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed"- Marvin (The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy)
"Your weasels are untied!"- Rejwanul Islam
"BWAHAHAHAHA (So ad infinitum)"- Any evil lord worth his salt.
"These Romans are crazy!"- Obelix (Asterix)
"What'cha got for me, Billy-bob? "- Myself (Oh, how I long to use it in a proper conversation!)
"Go away: I'm alright..."- H. G. Wells (Last words)
"I'm gaseous, invisible... and deadly"- Undead Shade (Warcraft 3: TFT)
"If there's only one nation in the sky, then shouldn't all passpors be valid for it?"- Piscine Molitor Patel (Life of Pi)
Thank you for taking an interest. By now you should have realized that all your efforts have been for naught, because sleazes like me are running amock all over the place. 'Tis a sad, sad reality of the world.
You can talk to me on msn if you feel like it- just don't bother me too much.
I have decided that you can only be allowed to speak to me after you answer these simple (Oh, don't you just wish they were!) questions:
A) If I were to peel a potato, would I sing "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" or "Take this Life' as I peel it?
B) How many wildebeests am I holding up?
C) Complete this sentence: "Hello, my name is Voldemort and my favorite Pokemon is [Insert name here]".
D) If London was a giant cucumber, then what would Dhaka be? (This is the most important question of them all).
E) Have you ever dreamt about cottage cheese with onions- and a side-order of tuna casserole?
F) Are you still here?
G) Suggest a good name for the star actor in the movie "The Last Dodo Hero."
H) "Dolores Umbridge is so blazin' hot"- if that thought is crossing your mind right now, then stay the Niflheim away from me.
Mail me with the answers, and I will decide whether you are worthy... or else you will be blocked with a titanium wall... bwahahaha...
Goodbye, young rhinoceros: may you graze long and well.
Oh...! As I leave you, I would just like you to read this little ditty I cooked up *clears throat*:
"Oh, Switzerland/ How I dream of thee...!/ Where the sun doth shine,/ and the chocolate is free...!"
CUT! Aaannd that's a wrap!
THIS IS NOT A REVIEW. I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A REVIEW. THIS IS A TEST OF A ALLEGEDLY FAULTY MECHANISM.
Author's Response: MY COUSIN TOLD ME THAT THERE WAS NO BOX WERE YOU WRITE THE REVIEWS IN THIS POEM...
I HAD TO CHECK IT OUT.
Author's Response: ITS ALRIGHT, PEOPLE! THIS THING WORKS JUST FINE!
Author's Response: ... like you didn\'t know that already.
Young Force, the Jedi is still with you.
Author's Response: Thank you, Yoda!
Y'know, if they really needed to take down the Bunnyman, who better for the job then Elmer Fudd?
Author's Response: =) That is a brilliant idea, and it would not surprise me if WB saw that and made a film out of it without giving you credit.
I don't think you should write a sequel for the blog just yet. Wait a few months. Write something else. And then you write it.
Remember, the spring that has been held back for the longest period of time bounces forward the strongest.
Oh, and something i saw on TV: "Hullaballoo, and how do you do? Musty prawns and Timbuktu! Kick 'em in the dishpans, Hoohoohoo!"
Author's Response: Well, yeah, it\'ll be awhile before I write the sequel to the blog. I\'m working on a novel right now, and two fanfiction projects, plus I\'m busy as a beta.
What was that weird thing from, because it sounds familiar... I know I\'ve heard it somewhere. (Possibly some guy on a cruise ship I was on this summer.)
So now this has been detoured to Humor Fics? Stranger things have happened...
Author's Response: Yep, I stuck it in \'humour fics\' because the contest is over. And I don\'t think it fit in any other category...
That was from 'Courage the Cowardly Dog'.
What a depressingly contradictory name.
Author's Response: I personally think that show is kinda lame, but each to his own...
Fairly Oddparents... yes, yes. Its quite good, I agree. Have you seen Spongebob yet?
Author's Response: No, I haven\'t... I still don\'t have cable teelvision. My grandmother does, and that\'s where I saw \"Fairly Odd-Parents.\" I don\'t watch much TV at home, \'cos I have very few channels!
Its lame, yes. Its VERY lame. But since I had nothing better to do...
Author's Response: Yeah, well, I\'ve seen \"Arthur\" from time to time, and I think \"The Fairly-Odd Parents\" is hilarious, so I can\'t talk!
And why exactly is Hedwig scared that I'll tattle on her? Has she forgotten that it was I who istigated 'The Great Push'? Well, has she?!!!! ANSWER ME, GOD!
Lets see... what was Pabna Mental Hosptial's phone number again?
Author's Response: *Shrugs*
A Piano. That's interesting. Piano. Good luck, you'll need it! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (Cough cough)
Darn it, what was that phone number?!
Author's Response: ...*Suddenly realizes that this review page no longer belongs to me*
That was... FANTASTIC! You should damn well have gotten more reviews!
Fantastic. Smashing. Shiny.
But wait... wasn't the map written after they became animagi? Ah well, who cares? Facts stink.
Author's Response: So others have suggested, but I decided the map was FINISHED after they became Animagic, but STARTED long before then.
Well, thats very logical and sensible. You've got me convinced.
Author's Response: Just consider it AU :)
Good.
Author's Response: thanks.
I feel that the chapter was too short, but keep writing: this shows promise!
Author's Response: Well, this is my first fic...so before trying some \"real\" stuff, I thought maybe I should just give it a try and see if I\'m any good. I promise I\'ll try to make the next chapter longer. Thanks loads for your review; I\'ve seen that people just add this story to their favourites and run away! Thanks again!
*Thumbs up*
Author's Response: *Big grin*
Super-stellar. Block-buster. UPDATE!
Author's Response: Thanks keep reading!
Bwahahahahahahahaha...!
There can be no worse fate for Lord Voldemort!
Good chapter. Keep churning them out.
Author's Response: Aah Zoheb....my sincerest reader! I\'m glad you enjoyed the chapter...ah wait there is too much fun planned ahead..and oboy I think I\'ll have to start work on the next chapter, lazy me!
Hmm... an intriguing chapter. It has great potential... let us see if it lives up to it, eh what? :)
Author's Response: Yes, Zoheb it definitely will, I assure you! Actually I wanted to throw a bit of plot in the whole thing too. Thanks for the review, Keep reading!!!
*Thinks about many positive words... too many to write down.*
I hope you excuse my lack of expression.
Author's Response: That\'s okay, Zoheb. You\'ve written PLENTY of long reviews before! Cheers!
--Schmergo (Schmerg_The_Impaler)
Author's Response:
\'Positive\' is a pretty good start, I think.
Thank you! *Waves*