Oh my Godric, this was amazing! I'm speechless. It's such a sad, sad story. I felt drawn into it from the very beginning. Your style is great and your characterisation is even better. I'm in awe. The ending was perfect and it really sums up Voldemort's view on love.

You really make it seem so effortlessly simple. Good job. The poem has a nice rhyme and a spooky sort of rhythm.

On a grammatical note, you should watch your apostrophes (can't, don't, she's...)

Overall, brilliant poem. Good luck in the future!

Author's Response: thanks. i'll bear that in mind for future

Hey! This is a nice beginning to a story with potential.
So far, I liked Rachel's character better. Her worries are well-presented and very real.
Katie, I think, got upset too quickly - or maybe she's just extremely hot.headed :) I think she also spent a lot of time pondering over the phone thing; I don't think many people would to that.
Anyhow, it's a cool beginning! I'm looking forward to more chapters soon :-)

Author's Response: Wow! I have potential! Who knew? Thanks. I'm gonna have a lot of fun getting deeper into Rachael's character as the story progresses. Yes, Katie did get angry rather quickly, because even though she is usually a very fun person to be around, she's a little bit of a pessimist, and gets angry or upset rather quickly. And I don't think she spent that much time worrying about the phone, but if she did it's because a lot of weird stuff has been happening to her lately, and most people don't answer phones in their sleep. That I know of. :-) I"m glad you like it, and do expect Chapter 2 up soon. it would have been up sooner, but it's been rejected twice because i obviously didn't read the rules carefully enough. Hopefully third time's the charm! H_T

This chapter gave me quite the creeps. You nailed the setting. I liked Abigail, she was a cool character. And I didn't expect that to happen with Trelawney and all! I only have one little nitpick; I suppose Abigail's last name is spelled Resnik, because it was most of the time - once you spelled it Resnick though.

Another good chapter! Keep it up :)
~Nez

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you liked this chapter better.

Wow... This was just wow. At first I thought it was about Remus, but it does actually capture Severus' feelings in the situation perfectly. The emotions of anger and grief mix so well, reinforced by the image of shattering glass and general destruction.

It made no noise as it tipped and he felt oddly unsatisfied. Drawing his wand, he murmured a spell and the sofa exploded with a satisfying noise. Smiling grimly, he walked up the stairs and into his bedroom. This room had yet to see any destruction.

This part, to me, shows that he wants to systematically destroy the remains of his life that is now worthless for him. And, yes, when angry you want things to make a noise as they get destroyed.

His anger evaporated under the weight of his grief.

This sentence is perfect. I can quite see him crumbling with grief at this part.

A very good and powerful work of art, with perfect characterization of Snape, and also of Dumbledore, who came across as compassionate and caring.

~Nez

Author's Response: Nez,
Thank you for your review. I cannot believe, or maybe I can with what and whom I normally write, that no one has yet said they thought it was about George. That is who it started out as. Thanks again.
Terri

Oh, this was priceless! I command you for your bravery on writing Dumbledore (he's a tricky character) and congratulate you for pulling it off that well. Gilderoy, of course, was quite in-character and hilarious. I loved Dumbledore pushing all the right buttons and flattering him when he needed to - it was a very Dumbledore thing. The end was great, as well! You have a way with Dumbledore. I will never get it how there was no one else available, though. He's a terrible teacher and is even bad at magic!

Well, congrats for a wonderful story!

Author's Response: Thank you very much for the review! I'll admit I was a little scared using Dumbledore as a character, but it turned out to be a lot of fun putting him in a room with Gilderoy Lockhart. They both have the ability to ramble at will. The funny thing about Lockhart is how he desperately tries (and often fails) to avoid looking like an absolute fraud.

This is interesting; I'll keep an eye out for this fic. It's a good concept and you seem to have a good grasp of the characters, so it will no doubt be a great story. Update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!