06/27/07
Hi! I'm Alyssa, and I'm 16. I'm a busy sophomore. Harry Potter is my default "homework-break." I love to write, and I'm currently obsessed with the Next Generation. JKR is a genius for giving us all these characters so conducive to fanfiction. :)
[Report This]
Potter's Pentagon: The Past (Book Three) by Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: The final installment in the Potter’s Pentagon Trilogy. Read “The Five” and “The Truth” first, myess? Okay!
WARNING! Contains Muggle adventures in Diagon Alley, unusual eyebrows, cheesy clichés galore, psycho Ted, the not-so-lost years of Merlin, a school-wide singalong, the old potato joke, Tyrone’s Princess Bride obsession, Emma’s stubborn denial of the existence of Tyrone’s mustache, a graphic death, a joke shop product as a major plot device, hobo Jordan, Jordan hugging, Jordan pulling pranks, time travel, the Love Shack, angst, and worst of all, Professor Zabini.
It’s the sixth year for Potter’s Pentagon and company, and our heroes learn that in the wizarding world, coming of age has a somewhat weightier significance. Students are busy with an Inter-House Unity Project, Jordan is having weird dreams, Pansy and Ophidias Malfoy have been released from Azkaban, Professor Zabini has a mysterious project of his own, and almost everyone is acting strangely. Meanwhile, at the Ministry of Magic, a man with a vendetta against Ron Weasley is trying his hardest to get him in the biggest trouble possible. Is the only way to save him to travel into the past?
New talents are discovered, new friendships form and old ones change, pasts are dredged up, and, of course, there’s lots of good old-fashioned snogging. And one of the five kills for the first time… while another becomes a casualty of war.
Starring 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Male Original Character runner-up Jordan Potter, Best Female Original Character nominees Ivy Potter, Haley Potter, Emma Weasley, and Giorgi Anderson, and Best Male Original Character nominee Ted Lupin! Nominated for 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Post-Hogwarts Story.
Date: 03/15/10 Title: Chapter 28: Epilogue: There And Back Again
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH, it's over!!!!!!!!!!
I'm kinda pressed for time right now or I'd leave a longer review. Tell you what: I'm going to reread the whole series and then it will all be fresh in my head and THEN I can leave you the longest, best review ever, m'kay? :)
Author's Response: DUDE, that would be ridiculous! But the most amazing thing ever! Thank you SO much, by the way!
Date: 09/04/08 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6: In Which Anatoly Matches Giorgi In Sheer Eccentricity
Oooh, a new chapter!!!!!!!
Woot!
Okay, so I just finished my first week of high school (well really still mid-school, but my grades now count for college and whatnot) in which I am taking several honors classes and the one AP class my school offers, and I had 2 major tests and three essays in the first week. So I'm pretty much exhausted, which is why this review will be rather...flat. You've been warned.
Awww, Jor-jums will be realllllly mad at Haley. Like, seriously mad. Furious. I know this because my brother likes to find out the password for my email account then read all the emails from my friends. And that's annoying. So I think he'll be mad at her because she read the email from Giorgi, who's really his only friend. Some twisted logic here.
GASP! Those weird dreams Jordan keeps having? They're creeping me out. Those are NOT normal hormones, buddy. It's like he's seeing a really twisted future. "We've got nothing to lose" sounds like "For the greater good." Jordan and Cecilia sound very...dangerous. Both very...efficient. They could be very cruel and cold. Ahhh, no!!!!
Haley and Anatoly, sitting in a tree! Mmmkay, I'll comment more on them later.
So not only is nelson Blanket-sop a lame worm-lover, he's a twisted pervert too. That makes me like him as a "villain" more, because before he seemed just misunderstood. But now that I know he's pervy too, okay, I get it now.
TED!!!!! No!!!! He...he's "not well." no! Teddy!!!! *sobs* He had better get better. Also, I bet he'll be the one to stop Jordy and Cecilia in their evil schemes. 889
Author's Response: WOW! You're in middle school, but you're taking an AP? You must be outrageously brilliant. I'm only in two AP's, and I'm in my junior year of high school. (I signed up for three AP's, but I couldn't take AP German because it was the same period as Ladies Select Chorus, and I'm too much of an egomaniac to be in the non-select chorus.)
I don't think Jordan will find out about Haley using his computer! Haley's sneaky. She just needs to mark his message as 'unread' and then log off. I'm sure Anatoly could help her with that, since he's Muggleborn. OR they could vandalize Jordan's computer and change everything pink and sparkly!
You're right, Jordan and Cecilia are scary. They sound like they'd make some kind of cold steel and glass world domination corporation. ^_^
Date: 08/20/08 Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5: In Which Professor Zabini Hatches A Diabolical Plan
Teddy? What's happening to sweet little--well maybe not so little--Ted? He can't be sick...or cursed...or whatever is causing him to drink the whole lake in the bathroom! I would just DIE! No! Make him better, O all powerful author of Schmergoness!!!!!! (please?)
On another note, Haley with Anatoly? Oooh, this shall be interesting, very interesting indeed!!!
I have this insane theory--since Ivy is paired with little Tabitha, I think the two will scheme and get Emma and Ted together. It's so...un-Ivy...that it would be a good way for her to get out of her shell, and she's just so sweet that she would want Emma and Tyroonie to be happy which is why she would do it. Or maybe she'll be distraught over Ted's weird illness thing and be all depressed and pinch-faced again. Oh, poor Ivy...
K, I think that's the end...i need to go to bed right now, cuz i'm really tired, which it partially why this review might be so spacey.
Author's Response: Poor Teddy... I have to say, I thought it was funny when it said 'the whole lake in the bathroom,' which sounds a bit funny taken out of context. Yep, Haley's the one stuck with a Slytherin- Haley, as in the girl who called Slytherin "The Future Evil Of England Society" and giggled. Should be interesting indeed.
Do you mean 'get Emma and Tyrone' together? I was a bit shocked when I saw the phrase 'get Emma and Ted together.' Because that is one ship that will never work! ^_^ But I have to tell you, on the Emma/Tyrone front, your theory's wrong-- Ivy and Tabby don't try to get them together. I'm telling you this because I really like your idea and WISH I'd done that.l Actually, Ivy and Tabitha's project is never really an issue in the story-- the story focuses more on Haley and Anatoly and, to a lesser extent, Jordan and Cecilia.
Ivy's role in this story is really unusual because it kind of continues on a storyline from the first book that wasn't really an issue in the second one-- the whole 'part of the Malfoy family' thing. I will tell you that she definitely comes into her own by the end of the book! I'm a bit of a feminist, so all of my female characters end up kicking some kind of butt.
Date: 03/07/09 Title: Chapter 13: Chapter 13: In Which Ted and Merlin Chat With Some Professors
Schmergo, dearie, you have reviewers. At the moment though, this reviewer needs to finish her book report on Pride and Prejudice, which unfortunately I understood about as much as the novel we're reading in French.I shall be breif.
So. Emma and Tyrone-ness!!! Yay!!!! But what's going to happen to them??? You left a cliffhanger there. :( Don't make Emma die. Emma can't die.
I like your portrayal of Merlin. It's so unique and non-old-mannish and awesome. Jordan needs to be more like Merlin and less brooding.
Author's Response: Ahahaha, thank you. It's too bad that I haven't updated my Pride and Prejudice story in awhile, because THAT might make for an interesting book report if you printed out Emma's summaries and turned them in! And I'm so glad you liked Merlin, because I was worried about that and how nontraditional I was making him.
Date: 08/07/08 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4: In Which An Old Adversary Slouches Back Onto The Scene
"This was a change from the Ophidias that Icy had known and tried to put up with for so long..."
Who or what is "Icy?" (I think you mean Ivy...) :D
"[Tyrone] was sitting behind Ted, who cramped his style somewhat in this respect. "
Hahaha, Ted cramping Tyrone's style? Ted isn't one to want to cramp anyone else's style...hahaha, that line really made me laugh.
I love Jordan..."I loathe group projects" Haha, that's so...Jordan!
I love the Emma/Tyrooniness. They're perfect for each other...Emma has to see that.
Welp, methinks that's all. Update soon, please.
Author's Response: NO, IT'S AN ENTIRELY NEW CHARACTER NAMED ICY, YOU DOLT! No, I'm kidding. ^_^ That would be awesome, though. And yeah, Tyrone's normally a tall guy, but when he's next to old six-foot-five Ted, then he doesn't feel like such a giraffe anymore. Honestly, I'm just like Jordan when it comes to projects. Normally, I'm the world's biggest underachiever when it comes to homework, but I'm obsessive over projects.
A Different View On Love by helz_belz
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: James would do anything to get inside Lily’s head. Lily would do anything to get away from James. Lily was brewing a banned potion. James went to find her. Lily made a mistake and the potion exploded. James got his wish, but is it much more than he bargained for?
Now Complete!
After a year the Epilouge is now up! Come read for a bit of fun!!
Runner up QSQ - Best Chaptered Canon Romance
Reason for Nomination:
This is the most unique take on how James and Lily really got to know each other. The story is hilarious and keeps you laughing throughout, but it never lets you forget the serious stuff. Plus, she somehow manages to end each chapter with a nice cliffhanger.
~~hestiajones
Date: 07/24/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter One: Why Am I Doing This Again?
Hah, ooh! I love it! This is brilliant...update soon! I can't wait to find out what lily does in James's body and vice versa.
Author's Response: I just finished writing the second chapter, but it still needs a bit of polishing and Beta'ing. I'll keep working on it and update as soon as possible. Check out my Author page for sneak peaks of what is next!
Date: 08/22/08 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter Two: When You Become Exceedingly Handsome
Hahaha, I can't wait to see how this is going o go! What will James's friends think? And LIly's? It'll certainly be hard for James to do a decent approximation of a girl, let alone Lily!
Author's Response: What will James' friends think? I think they will notice something different, but will they put there finger on it? I'm pretty sure James will have a good time being Lily....at first....
Thanks for the review!
Check out my Authors page for a sneak peak at chapter three!
Date: 09/28/09 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter One: Why Am I Doing This Again?
I really like this story! I'm glad you actually update it regularly.
I usually am not nitpicky in reviews even when I find a lot of mistakes (which actually yours seemed to have quite a few.....maybe it's just my mood today. I'm on the grammar hunt. But they didn't detract that much.)
Firstly, in a couple places, you put "women" where it should have been "woman." "Women" is the plural of "woman."
Secondly, in chapter 12, I think it is, I like Sirius's confession, but it would work much better as a one-shot. Can you honestly picture someone saying that aloud? Especially Sirius? It's just not quite dialogue, so I found myself skimming over some of the larger paragraphs to get to something more interesting and teenage-boy-ish.
Another little thing you seem to do a lot when writing dialogue is have the characters say "we are" or "I am" instead of "we're" or "I'm." It's a matter of voice. It's not necessarily wrong, it just sounds stiff or overly sarcastic when Sirius or James use that kind of language.
This is an extract from chapter 13: "he was laughing too hard to see Professor Slughorn bounce off his large stomach and crashed to the ground." Are you getting the same image I am here? (ps, my image is Sluggy floating around like a balloon and bouncing off walls with his protruding stomach. It makes me giggle, but I don't think that's really what you meant here.) :)
That's all I have time for right now--hope it helped!!!
Author's Response: Thanks for the long review. I went through the story again and tried to pick up all the Women/Woman errors, and I did make a few, thanks for pointing that out.
With Sirius' confession, you could be right, it might have worked better as a oneshot. But, as it's in the chapter now, I don't really want to change it too much. I do see your point though, it seems a little too mature for Sirius. But hey, he went though a lot.
I didn't even notice that about the dialogue. I suppose that is just the way I write. I don't even notice it when I'm reading it back.
Haha, that does promote a weird image. I fixed that up too. Thanks for the review, it did help :)
Magical Moments - A Special Issue by luinrina
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Once again the four most mischievous boys Hogwarts has probably ever seen have been caught when executing a prank. The consequences? A detention. But they never saw this detention coming…
Date: 08/14/08 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue - Not the Everyday Detention
Aww, a cliffhanger! Thanks a lot.
In any case, I'm eager to see how this turns out. I'd leave a longer, better review but I don't have time right this moment. I'm eager for the next chapter! Update soon!
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and leaving your nice comment. Whenever I have another free place in the queue I shall update the story.
More than Meets the Eye by lilybobily7
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: First problem: James Potter is Head Boy. Second problem: Why is he acting so different? The James Potter that Lily Evans knows is arrogant and conceited and loves Quidditch and bullying his “inferiors” with an unimaginable passion. This year he’s kind and charming and much more, shall we dare say it…mature. He is also much more distant than he has ever been in all her years at Hogwarts. In her seventh year, Lily finds out that there is much more to James Potter than meets the eye and together they set out on the long and precarious road to each other’s hearts.
Date: 03/16/09 Title: Chapter 14: Snowballs
Ooooh, cyberchip cookies, my favourite. I'm guessing she's going to talk to....Olivia. Even though that makes no sense. OH! Severus?
Author's Response: Olivia:...possibly
Severus:...interesting idea ;)
Date: 01/17/09 Title: Chapter 12: "Tree House"
Oh! Bu-bu-but.....She loves him! Awwwww, poor James. It took a lot of courage for him to do that.....and she ruined it! Awwww. I want more!
Author's Response: more will come soon. =]
thanks for reviewing!
Letting Go by summerskies
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: It's hard to let go, it's even harder realizing that you can't. JamesLily Oneshot.
Date: 09/06/08 Title: Chapter 1: Letting Go
I think you should change the rating on this--1st-2nd years implies that 11 and 12 year olds could read this, and I think it contains some inappropriate material. Sorry if that sounds rude, and this is your first review and all...I just thought the rating should be higher.
Author's Response: Thank you! As you can tell I'm new to this, sorry!
Secret Mischief by ginny112
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: As Luna Lovegood begins her seventh year at Hogwarts, she finds herself joining Ginny and the others in their plan to help a forlorn George Weasley move on from his misery and be happy again after the death of his twin, Fred. But when Ginny decides to spice things up by altering the plans secretly, Luna is treated to an unexpected surprise …
George/Luna
Date: 03/20/09 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue: Remembrance
I LOVELOVELOVE this story so far. At first, I saw the summarry and it said George/Luna, which I was very hesitant to read because I hate straying from canon. But I was bored, so I startesd reading it and couldn't stop. I lOVE your portrayal of Luna!!!!! She's always been one of my favourites....okay, my VERY favourite....so much that I did a mahvelous painting of her in oils....hehe....anyway, I thought you captured her just right. Her point of view is dead-on. She thinks almost like a child....and I adore that. Keep writing; I cannot wait to see the next chapter!!!
Hanky-Panky: A Potter's Pentagon One-Shot by Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: It's that time of year. Time for an untimely winter ball, and Emma Weasley is not thrilled about Tyrone Thomas' relentless pursuit if her. But will his terrible singing and creepy stalker-ish antics woo her at last? And what the heck is Jordan Potter up to? DH is very disregarded. No Albus Severuses here.
I am Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff House, and this is my submission to the Winter Snows thingy, in the "Melting a Winter Heart" category.
Date: 12/27/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
YAAAAAAAY!!! i loooovelovelove this story. Basically, I love anything to do with anything you write. Haha.
Let me just say, if I were Emma, I would DIE of embarrassment if some dude came up and sang to me in the middle of class. But then, if I were Emma, I would react like Emma did, because, well, I would BE her. Yeah. So if I were in Emma's situation, I would die. Yeppers.
Mmmkay, JORDAN/GIORGI. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Awwww, Jordan is so adorable. When he's not all emo and depressed and morbid and a cruelly efficient genius and stuff.
I have decided something. Giorgi NEEDS to attend Hogwarts. Yep. Now, I kNOW, she can't do magic, but she could learn the theory and stuff, and she could do home study of all her Muggle subjects and she would actually have FRIENDS! And Jorjums would be less emo with her sunshiney spirit around! Okay, so maybe it wouldn't work, but it's an idea.
On a different note, but not an entirely obscure one, I drew the Pentagon (and Tyrooney) as fairies. Yes. I dunno why, but for a couple weeks I was OBSESSED with fairies and the drawing thereof (and I still am, sorta.) The point is, I drew them, and they amuse me greatly. Teehee. I shall have to send them to you. Along with a couple other rather amusing drawings of them. Yep. Should I PM you on the boards or summat?
Author's Response: Oh my gosh, thank you so much! IN ANY CASE! I'm not Emma, because if some dude sang to me in the middle of class, I would totally acquiesce right there. I'm a bit more Haleyish in that department, I guess. But I love singing and public humiliation. As for Giorgi attending Hogwarts, that won't happen, but that doesn't mean things won't improve at Giorgi's schooool!
Dude, I absolutely MUST SEE Potter's Pentagon characters as fairies. That sounds like the coolest thing ever. They need awesome fairy names like Puck and Mustardseed and Peaseblossom and Oberon!
The Fastest Yet by Racing Co
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: In 1967, Cleansweeps and Comets are the racing brooms of choice in the wizarding world, but a few Hogwarts students have plans to revolutionize the market. Deucalion Wilcott, a Quidditch prodigy, and Slytherin classmate Ivan Berdahl team together to design the greatest racing broom in history.
Who knows broomsticks better than two flying enthusiasts? With a little bit of skill, rule breaking, and plain luck, the Nimbus Racing Broom Company is founded.
Date: 05/30/09 Title: Chapter 4: Nimbus the Second
Oooh, I like this story so far. Your characters are great--I like Ivan. I'm interested to see how they'll go about inventing the Nimbus. Please update soon!
Author's Response: Thanks! I'm certainly glad you like the story so far. I'm hammering out the next chapter, so it'll get updated soon.
Trickster by Willow Rosenberg
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: After the disastrous events of the end of the Marauder's fifth year, a fuming Lily Evans decides that that arrogant James Potter and his friends need a taste of their own medicine. The straight-laced Prefect suddenly finds herself pranking her class's trickiest boys--and maybe even enjoying it. Coupled with a series of mysterious apology letters that Lily has begun receiving, it's bound to be an interesting year.
Winner of the 2010 QSQ for Best Canon Romance!
Date: 07/20/10 Title: Chapter 14: Between the Lines
This is honestly the best MWPP-era story I've ever read. You're so good at all the unexpected little plot twists and the characterization and the Sirius-James relationship and the Lily-James relationship (it works very well how you have them teaming up to prank people)...
I love your Lily and your James (I can see a lot of Harry in them) and Sirius and Remus aren't bad either. I also love how you've done Peter. In most fics, he's stupid and obnoxious and it's hard to see why the others ever want to hang around him, but you've included lots of things to make that more believable. I could go on for hours but it's quarter til 1a.m. where I am. I reallllly look forward to the next couple chapters!!
Author's Response: oh thank you so much! yeah peter's tough, knowing what happens eventually...but they had to have trusted him initially. the next chapter's in queue now, so it should be up soon!!
Brothers & Sisters by ringobeatlesfan4
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary:
They fight. They argue. They threaten never to speak again. But in the end, it’s all alright. Because they’re brothers and sisters, or at least that’s what it feels like. James, Albus, and Lily Potter are the closest siblings you’d ever find. Rose and Hugo Weasley have their differences, but in the end, they would die for each other. And as for Scorpius Malfoy… he’s unlike anything the others have seen before. But he’s okay… because he saved them on countless occasions.
This is the story of the bonds between siblings, cousins, and friends. It’s the story of forgetting the past to create a brighter future. And it’s the story of learning to let go of the old, and holding on to the new.
Date: 06/22/09 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: Surprises
I like this so far--what will happen to Hugo?
I'm working on your art request--I can't wait to see the next chapter because I need to know more about those OCs! Could you maybe PM me a draft on the boards?
Author's Response: Hi again! Sure, I can send you a first draft! I have a potential beta (I just have to reply to my thread) and it will be sent to them ASAP, but I can definitely send you a draft. Thanks for the revie,w and as for what will happen to Hugo... *evil laugh* You'll have to wait to find that out! {BeccA}
Paint Me Eternal by grangergurl
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Kherington Squires has been around for a long time. She has personally witnessed every historically important event in wizarding history, but has done it quietly. She understands that nature's course continues to move forward.
But what happens when she falls in love? Will she let nature keep moving, or try to stop it before time continues to kill all she loves?
Date: 06/04/09 Title: Chapter 2: Paint Me a Family
Oh, this is intriguing so far! How are these people not dead? Somehow it reminds me suspiciously of Twilight, seeing as how they never age and have to move around. But they seem entirely human. I'm confused, which means I can't wait to find out more! Please update soon.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! And I was sort of afraid of that, to be honest. I like Twilight well enough, but it did quite ruin the idea of immortality for me. However, I'm glad that you're receptive to the story. Thanks so much for your confusion (if that makes sense)!
Harry and Lord V: Beauty and the Beast Gone Potter by Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Yet another ridiculous Harry Potter musical spoof by yours truly, this one is set during Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, to the tune of Alan Menken, Howard Ashman, and Tim Rice's brilliant musical, Beauty and the Beast!
If you like this, go to my profile and read some of my other parodies, of West Side Story, Wicked, Sweeney Todd, High School Musical, Les Miserables, and Phantom of the Opera!
Date: 06/29/09 Title: Chapter 1: ACT ONE
EEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! You have no idea how much I love this musical. I'd just finished watching the movie when I came to the computer and this was there and I read it and sang all your lyrics aloud and it was SO MUCH FUN and I can't wait for Act 2!!!! (Also, I did that with Wicked, and it was so totally wicked.)
Author's Response: Thank you! Beauty and the Beast is such afun and beautiful musical. It's great getting reviews from you again!
Scenes from Shell Cottage by WeasleyMom
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: This fic is a series of missing moments from the time H/R&H were at Shell Cottage, beginning immediately after they Disapparated from Malfoy Manor. JKR shows us what was going on with Harry, but this is my version of what could have happened with Ron and Hermione after one of the most emotional/disturbing events in the entire series.
UPDATED June 2010 When I first wrote this fic, I didn't know what a beta reader was, and frankly, it showed. Thanks so much to Natalie for helping me polish this up and make it more readable. Thanks also to both Julia and Carole, whose helpful comments in the review section allowed me to make some much-needed corrections during the rewrite. I would love to know what you think ~ reviews are very much appreciated!
This was nominated in the 2010 Quicksilver Quill Awards for Best Canon Romance.
Date: 09/08/09 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
I love this first chapter! It's so powerfully emotional. I think you've done the characters just right. I can't wait for the next one! (Sorry this review hasn't much substance; it's really late where I am. I'll try and give more concrit in the future, k?) :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you like it.